1
00:00:01,751 --> 00:00:03,485
Hey!
What the hell is this?
2
00:00:03,486 --> 00:00:05,585
I'm guessing it's my latest
budget cut proposal
3
00:00:05,586 --> 00:00:07,485
based on your rage sweat.
4
00:00:07,501 --> 00:00:09,185
First of all,
I am rage glowing.
5
00:00:09,220 --> 00:00:11,104
Second, you wanna cut funding
6
00:00:11,138 --> 00:00:12,956
for the Pawnee Palms
Public Putt-Putt?
7
00:00:12,990 --> 00:00:15,242
What did
the P.P.P.P.P. ever do to you?
8
00:00:15,276 --> 00:00:17,644
Ron is very anti-government,
and he has that philosophy,
9
00:00:17,678 --> 00:00:19,095
but there are just certain
things that you don't cut.
10
00:00:19,130 --> 00:00:22,115
Schools, police, mini-golf,
merry-go-rounds, parades,
11
00:00:22,149 --> 00:00:24,450
gazebo repair,
roads and bridges, whatever.
12
00:00:24,484 --> 00:00:26,486
Pretty gardens,
hummingbird feeders.
13
00:00:26,520 --> 00:00:29,472
I believe in cutting
useless government projects.
14
00:00:29,507 --> 00:00:31,774
I also believe
in cutting useful projects,
15
00:00:31,809 --> 00:00:34,577
future projects,
and past projects.
16
00:00:34,612 --> 00:00:37,046
The Hoover Dam
is a travesty.
17
00:00:37,081 --> 00:00:38,648
You also believe
in making furniture.
18
00:00:38,682 --> 00:00:40,733
Why don't you go
solder a chair instead?
19
00:00:40,768 --> 00:00:42,185
Do you expect me
to make a chair
20
00:00:42,219 --> 00:00:44,787
out of transistor chips
and small wires?
21
00:00:44,839 --> 00:00:46,890
Look, the defunding
of the mini-golf course
22
00:00:46,924 --> 00:00:49,509
is on the agenda for the city
council meeting tomorrow.
23
00:00:49,543 --> 00:00:52,395
I'm sure you'll argue against it
with your trademark vigor.
24
00:00:52,446 --> 00:00:54,664
Oh, I will argue,
and I'm gonna win.
25
00:00:54,715 --> 00:00:56,733
That putt-putt
is gonna be around forever,
26
00:00:56,767 --> 00:00:58,201
and when I am done with it,
27
00:00:58,252 --> 00:01:01,287
it'll attract more visitors
than the Hoover Dam.
28
00:01:01,305 --> 00:01:04,140
And it'll produce double
the amount of electricity.
29
00:01:04,175 --> 00:01:05,691
- How?
- I'll figure it out.
30
00:01:05,709 --> 00:01:07,327
It already has windmills.
Who cares?
31
00:01:07,361 --> 00:01:10,246
[Triumphant music]
32
00:01:10,281 --> 00:01:15,087
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
33
00:01:27,447 --> 00:01:29,382
Councilmen, I have something
to discuss with you,
34
00:01:29,416 --> 00:01:31,067
but before I do,
can I just point out
35
00:01:31,118 --> 00:01:33,753
how handsome
the both of you look today?
36
00:01:33,787 --> 00:01:36,055
- Yeah, I know.
- I feel very ill.
37
00:01:36,090 --> 00:01:37,874
Okay, well, tomorrow
we are voting on funding
38
00:01:37,925 --> 00:01:39,726
for the mini-golf course,
and personally,
39
00:01:39,760 --> 00:01:41,044
I think it is great
for families,
40
00:01:41,078 --> 00:01:44,264
it's a great job creator,
and it's extremely cute.
41
00:01:44,298 --> 00:01:46,049
I'm wondering which way
you two are leaning.
42
00:01:46,083 --> 00:01:47,584
Well, the last time
I was there,
43
00:01:47,618 --> 00:01:50,904
I saw kids of all races
getting along and playing.
44
00:01:50,938 --> 00:01:52,755
It was terrible.
45
00:01:52,790 --> 00:01:54,106
So I'm voting
to get rid of it.
46
00:01:54,124 --> 00:01:56,125
At least you have
a good reason.
47
00:01:56,160 --> 00:01:57,977
Well, Howser is with me.
48
00:01:58,011 --> 00:01:59,195
Milton is with Dexhart.
49
00:01:59,230 --> 00:02:00,763
Jeremy, you're the swing vote.
50
00:02:00,814 --> 00:02:02,282
- What do you think?
- Hmm.
51
00:02:02,316 --> 00:02:04,951
Well, on the one hand, I love
cutting government programs.
52
00:02:04,985 --> 00:02:08,004
On the other hand,
mini-golf rules.
53
00:02:08,038 --> 00:02:11,024
And on the third hand,
I hate both you and Ron Swanson.
54
00:02:11,058 --> 00:02:12,976
So this one could go either way.
55
00:02:13,010 --> 00:02:14,744
I'm kind of a badass wild card.
56
00:02:15,478 --> 00:02:17,063
Hey, what are you
doing tonight?
57
00:02:17,097 --> 00:02:19,115
More like who am I doing?
58
00:02:19,149 --> 00:02:21,184
[Chuckles]
59
00:02:21,918 --> 00:02:22,635
No one.
60
00:02:22,653 --> 00:02:23,686
I'm free.
What's up?
61
00:02:24,221 --> 00:02:26,322
Can I get two beers
and an ice water
62
00:02:26,357 --> 00:02:28,508
for my friend here,
designated driver?
63
00:02:28,542 --> 00:02:30,393
I am?
You drove here.
64
00:02:30,427 --> 00:02:31,344
Nah, it's too late, bro.
65
00:02:31,378 --> 00:02:32,362
I already ordered the water.
66
00:02:32,413 --> 00:02:33,613
I don't know
what you want me to do.
67
00:02:33,647 --> 00:02:34,831
Andy and I just closed
a big donation
68
00:02:34,865 --> 00:02:36,332
to the Redwood Music Program,
69
00:02:36,367 --> 00:02:38,150
a charity he discovered,
70
00:02:38,168 --> 00:02:40,786
so I suggested we all go out
for a celebratory drink.
71
00:02:40,804 --> 00:02:44,957
And somehow I just ended up
becoming the designated driver.
72
00:02:44,975 --> 00:02:47,610
And paying for everyone.
73
00:02:47,645 --> 00:02:49,829
And I didn't
get to choose the bar.
74
00:02:49,863 --> 00:02:51,881
I should be more assertive.
75
00:02:51,915 --> 00:02:53,650
[Rock music]
76
00:02:53,684 --> 00:02:56,452
Aw, the band
is moving me tonight.
77
00:02:56,487 --> 00:02:58,071
It's really good.
78
00:02:58,105 --> 00:03:00,139
Really?
They sound kinda crappy to me.
79
00:03:00,157 --> 00:03:01,474
Kinda sounds like
one of your songs, babe.
80
00:03:01,508 --> 00:03:03,376
Well, you know what,
Mouse Rat has a lot of influence
81
00:03:03,394 --> 00:03:05,311
on some
of the local high school bands,
82
00:03:05,346 --> 00:03:07,397
mostly 'cause Chang
buys 'em beer and whatnot.
83
00:03:07,431 --> 00:03:09,348
Wait, Andy,
this is a Mouse Rat song.
84
00:03:09,366 --> 00:03:12,285
♪ Spread your wings
and fly, yeah ♪
85
00:03:12,319 --> 00:03:13,419
That's my band.
86
00:03:13,454 --> 00:03:14,537
I didn't recognize us
without me
87
00:03:14,571 --> 00:03:15,672
because I'm
the only one that matters.
88
00:03:15,706 --> 00:03:16,956
Thank you, everyone.
89
00:03:16,974 --> 00:03:18,441
We are Rat Mouse.
90
00:03:18,475 --> 00:03:19,826
Rat Mouse?
91
00:03:19,860 --> 00:03:20,810
Rat bastards.
92
00:03:20,844 --> 00:03:21,761
They're playing without me?
93
00:03:21,795 --> 00:03:23,513
That's a song I wrote!
94
00:03:24,547 --> 00:03:26,732
Hey, baby, can I borrow
your car for a month?
95
00:03:26,750 --> 00:03:27,984
I already lent you my car.
96
00:03:28,018 --> 00:03:29,435
Do you not know
where my car is?
97
00:03:29,470 --> 00:03:31,270
Ugh, I'm so sick
of the third degree.
98
00:03:31,305 --> 00:03:32,355
It's like dating a cop.
99
00:03:32,389 --> 00:03:34,574
I'm gassy.
Let's make out.
100
00:03:34,608 --> 00:03:35,625
- What?
- Yeah.
101
00:03:36,459 --> 00:03:37,327
Move aside!
102
00:03:37,378 --> 00:03:39,595
Dating Mona-Lisa
is awesome.
103
00:03:39,646 --> 00:03:42,114
Except that I live
in constant fear for my life.
104
00:03:42,132 --> 00:03:44,684
So I guess it's time
to do the mature thing
105
00:03:44,718 --> 00:03:47,270
and have someone else
dump her for me.
106
00:03:47,304 --> 00:03:50,189
Uh, Perkins, sit down.
107
00:03:50,207 --> 00:03:51,974
I just heard
that you and Traeger
108
00:03:52,009 --> 00:03:53,459
might be
getting back together.
109
00:03:53,493 --> 00:03:54,660
Yeah, it's funny, right?
110
00:03:54,695 --> 00:03:55,812
I mean,
we're already planning
111
00:03:55,846 --> 00:03:56,929
on having a baby together.
112
00:03:56,947 --> 00:03:57,997
We're not quite
a couple but--
113
00:03:58,031 --> 00:03:59,048
Yeah. Cool. Congrats.
114
00:03:59,083 --> 00:04:00,350
Listen, I need your help.
115
00:04:00,384 --> 00:04:01,718
My girlfriend is crazy.
116
00:04:01,752 --> 00:04:03,853
You say that
about every girl you date.
117
00:04:03,887 --> 00:04:05,004
You said that about me.
118
00:04:05,039 --> 00:04:06,289
Calm down, Ann.
You're proving my point.
119
00:04:06,323 --> 00:04:08,991
Seriously, Mona-Lisa
is legit insane.
120
00:04:09,043 --> 00:04:10,076
She once jumped
out of a moving car
121
00:04:10,094 --> 00:04:11,728
to buy a Nicki Minaj poster.
122
00:04:11,762 --> 00:04:13,913
Can you break up
with her for me?
123
00:04:13,947 --> 00:04:15,631
I'm not gonna
dump a girl for you.
124
00:04:15,666 --> 00:04:17,550
I'll give you
that chenille blanket of mine
125
00:04:17,584 --> 00:04:19,252
- you love so much.
- Deal.
126
00:04:19,286 --> 00:04:20,686
Ugh, but that's
my favorite blankie.
127
00:04:20,704 --> 00:04:22,171
- Won't you do it for free?
- Nope.
128
00:04:22,222 --> 00:04:24,607
Fine.
129
00:04:24,641 --> 00:04:27,126
Yeah, dead ringer
for Courtney Thorne-Smith.
130
00:04:27,161 --> 00:04:29,078
She works
at the gas station.
131
00:04:29,113 --> 00:04:31,497
Okay, I need to have Jamm
fall in love with this place,
132
00:04:31,515 --> 00:04:32,799
so I'm rolling out
the red carpet.
133
00:04:32,833 --> 00:04:34,350
I need you to stay upbeat.
134
00:04:34,401 --> 00:04:35,601
Keep things light.
135
00:04:35,619 --> 00:04:36,602
Absolutely.
136
00:04:36,620 --> 00:04:38,254
I can be a sort of...
137
00:04:38,288 --> 00:04:40,456
Conversational lubricant.
138
00:04:40,507 --> 00:04:41,391
Yeah, there's probably
a less gross way
139
00:04:41,442 --> 00:04:42,442
to say it, but sure.
140
00:04:42,476 --> 00:04:43,693
I love being a caddy.
141
00:04:43,727 --> 00:04:47,029
It's so much more
than just carrying clubs.
142
00:04:47,064 --> 00:04:49,549
It's about offering
positive reinforcement.
143
00:04:49,583 --> 00:04:52,918
I consider myself a caddy
to everyone in my life.
144
00:04:52,936 --> 00:04:55,721
- Yeah, good one!
- Nice shot!
145
00:04:55,756 --> 00:04:56,889
Great sweeping.
146
00:04:56,907 --> 00:05:00,009
Way to be, duck.
147
00:05:00,060 --> 00:05:01,894
Councilman, nice putter.
148
00:05:01,912 --> 00:05:03,362
Oh, thank you very much.
149
00:05:03,397 --> 00:05:05,665
Some fat Hawaiian guy
left it in my waiting room.
150
00:05:05,699 --> 00:05:07,020
When he came back,
I was all like,
151
00:05:07,050 --> 00:05:09,435
"Oh, uh, yeah, yeah,
no, I haven't seen it.
152
00:05:09,470 --> 00:05:10,386
I don't know."
153
00:05:10,421 --> 00:05:11,804
[Chuckles]
Classic.
154
00:05:11,839 --> 00:05:14,157
[Fake laugh]
What a great and funny story.
155
00:05:14,191 --> 00:05:16,426
Okay, before we start,
anybody want a hot dog?
156
00:05:16,477 --> 00:05:17,660
Hot dogs?
157
00:05:17,694 --> 00:05:20,746
You know I have irritable bowel
syndrome, you racist.
158
00:05:20,780 --> 00:05:22,932
Yikes, okay.
How about a snow cone on me?
159
00:05:22,966 --> 00:05:24,066
Hello, Councilman.
160
00:05:24,101 --> 00:05:26,786
Chris, Leslie,
snow cone lady.
161
00:05:26,820 --> 00:05:28,554
I see
you're about to play a round
162
00:05:28,589 --> 00:05:30,656
of publicly
subsidized mini-golf.
163
00:05:31,191 --> 00:05:33,559
Mind if I join you?
164
00:05:33,893 --> 00:05:37,113
Well, hello, Burly, Chang.
165
00:05:37,147 --> 00:05:38,297
Hey, man, what's up?
166
00:05:38,332 --> 00:05:39,949
I was just
over at the bar,
167
00:05:39,983 --> 00:05:41,784
enjoying a wonderful night
with my co-workers
168
00:05:41,835 --> 00:05:43,202
who all talked
about how awesome I was,
169
00:05:43,237 --> 00:05:44,153
and I look up,
and what do I see?
170
00:05:44,188 --> 00:05:45,505
A band.
171
00:05:45,539 --> 00:05:47,039
But you're missing something
like, uh, I don't know,
172
00:05:47,074 --> 00:05:50,960
your lead singer/songwriter/
T-shirt designer/nacho chef.
173
00:05:50,994 --> 00:05:52,344
What's up?
174
00:05:52,362 --> 00:05:54,247
First of all,
your nachos are terrible.
175
00:05:54,281 --> 00:05:55,665
No one's had
the guts to tell you.
176
00:05:55,699 --> 00:05:57,066
Why don't you melt
the cheese?
177
00:05:57,117 --> 00:05:58,201
[Scoffs]
178
00:05:58,252 --> 00:05:59,936
We tried to tell you
about the show, man.
179
00:05:59,970 --> 00:06:01,571
I called your cell,
like, 20 times.
180
00:06:01,605 --> 00:06:03,256
Well, I dropped
my cell phone
181
00:06:03,290 --> 00:06:05,274
in a bowl of cereal
last week, you idiot.
182
00:06:05,309 --> 00:06:07,660
You bothered to call me,
you'd have known that.
183
00:06:07,694 --> 00:06:08,911
Maybe you should
change your name
184
00:06:08,946 --> 00:06:11,647
to Burly and The Backstabbers.
185
00:06:11,682 --> 00:06:13,232
That's a pretty good name,
actually.
186
00:06:13,250 --> 00:06:15,635
Yeah, he's really good
at coming up with names.
187
00:06:16,169 --> 00:06:18,003
Get me
a Budweiser Black Crown.
188
00:06:18,021 --> 00:06:19,338
You guys got
Black Crown here?
189
00:06:19,356 --> 00:06:21,157
If not, you should.
190
00:06:21,191 --> 00:06:22,241
Ron, are you gonna
be joining us?
191
00:06:22,275 --> 00:06:24,310
I won't be playing.
192
00:06:24,344 --> 00:06:26,245
I'm simply here
to remind Councilman Jamm
193
00:06:26,263 --> 00:06:28,181
that this ridiculous play palace
194
00:06:28,215 --> 00:06:30,716
costs the taxpayers
thousands of dollars a year.
195
00:06:30,734 --> 00:06:32,151
And what a bargain.
196
00:06:32,186 --> 00:06:34,820
I mean, kids love it,
adults love it, Jamm loves it.
197
00:06:34,855 --> 00:06:36,072
Everybody loves it.
198
00:06:36,106 --> 00:06:37,356
It's like
the Toy Story 3 of places.
199
00:06:37,390 --> 00:06:38,574
Yeah, she's right, Swanson.
200
00:06:38,609 --> 00:06:39,909
I do love it.
201
00:06:39,943 --> 00:06:41,160
You should relax a little.
202
00:06:41,195 --> 00:06:42,361
Have a snow cone.
203
00:06:42,395 --> 00:06:43,496
Leslie's buying all night.
204
00:06:43,530 --> 00:06:44,580
You don't say.
205
00:06:44,615 --> 00:06:46,165
She's buying you snow cones,
206
00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:49,835
and tomorrow you're voting on
an issue that she cares about.
207
00:06:50,170 --> 00:06:51,420
Hey, guys, what, are we
gonna stand around all day
208
00:06:51,455 --> 00:06:53,906
and listen to Ron
spout off unrelated facts
209
00:06:53,924 --> 00:06:56,075
about blah, blah, blah,
or are we gonna play?
210
00:06:56,093 --> 00:06:57,243
Game on.
211
00:06:57,244 --> 00:06:58,244
Hey, everybody, great news.
212
00:06:58,762 --> 00:07:00,880
They gave us
free mylar balloons.
213
00:07:00,914 --> 00:07:03,099
I got dibs
on the dinosaur.
214
00:07:03,133 --> 00:07:05,184
And the pirate and the dolphin.
I want all of 'em.
215
00:07:05,219 --> 00:07:07,270
- You got 'em.
- Sweet.
216
00:07:09,019 --> 00:07:11,270
The Councilman is away...
Good luck to you both.
217
00:07:11,741 --> 00:07:14,345
Luck has nothing
to do with it, Chris.
218
00:07:16,679 --> 00:07:17,663
Yeah, I could be a pro!
219
00:07:17,714 --> 00:07:19,381
Wow, you are
on fire, Jeremy.
220
00:07:19,615 --> 00:07:20,832
- Having fun?
- Mmhmm.
221
00:07:20,867 --> 00:07:23,668
I think this proves
that this is a wonderful place
222
00:07:23,903 --> 00:07:25,904
that brings joy
to people's lives
223
00:07:25,938 --> 00:07:27,689
and brings
a community together.
224
00:07:27,707 --> 00:07:29,674
It's also a place
that costs the taxpayer
225
00:07:29,709 --> 00:07:32,627
$9,000 in annual subsidies.
226
00:07:32,661 --> 00:07:33,728
[Blows raspberry]
227
00:07:33,763 --> 00:07:35,030
You guys sound like school.
228
00:07:35,064 --> 00:07:37,599
I have two important pieces
of caddy information.
229
00:07:37,633 --> 00:07:39,768
Councilman Jamm
leads by eight strokes,
230
00:07:39,802 --> 00:07:41,836
and you are both
about to set a course record.
231
00:07:41,870 --> 00:07:43,121
For friendship.
232
00:07:43,155 --> 00:07:45,440
On to the next hole.
233
00:07:45,474 --> 00:07:47,742
You are pandering
to get a vote.
234
00:07:47,776 --> 00:07:49,677
And worse,
you're deliberately losing.
235
00:07:49,695 --> 00:07:50,745
I am not
deliberately losing.
236
00:07:50,779 --> 00:07:52,614
I'm having
a very off night.
237
00:07:52,648 --> 00:07:54,132
Losing on purpose
is a form of lying.
238
00:07:54,666 --> 00:07:56,801
You're only as good
as your word.
239
00:07:56,836 --> 00:07:57,852
You want a word, Ron?
240
00:07:57,887 --> 00:07:59,404
I have a word for you.
241
00:07:59,438 --> 00:08:01,689
I will do anything
I can to get Jamm's vote
242
00:08:01,707 --> 00:08:03,341
so that he will
keep this course open,
243
00:08:03,392 --> 00:08:04,592
and it will be good
for the community--
244
00:08:04,610 --> 00:08:05,694
stop!
I know it's more than one word.
245
00:08:05,728 --> 00:08:07,929
Shut up.
246
00:08:07,963 --> 00:08:09,347
♪ Remember...
247
00:08:09,982 --> 00:08:11,182
Hi, Mona-Lisa?
248
00:08:11,233 --> 00:08:12,367
- [Coughs]
- Hi.
249
00:08:12,401 --> 00:08:13,368
I'm Ann Perkins.
250
00:08:13,402 --> 00:08:15,186
- I used to date Tom.
- Oh, okay.
251
00:08:15,221 --> 00:08:17,772
We can do this,
but I will bite you.
252
00:08:17,807 --> 00:08:20,025
Is that a screwdrive--
no, I do not want to fight.
253
00:08:20,059 --> 00:08:21,159
- No.
- Okay.
254
00:08:21,193 --> 00:08:22,994
I just wanna
talk to you woman-to-woman
255
00:08:23,045 --> 00:08:25,814
because I know Tom
pretty well.
256
00:08:25,848 --> 00:08:26,765
Do you know his ATM pin?
257
00:08:26,799 --> 00:08:27,816
'Cause I cannot crack
258
00:08:27,850 --> 00:08:28,883
that little bitch's code.
259
00:08:28,918 --> 00:08:30,418
[Fake laughs]
I don't.
260
00:08:30,943 --> 00:08:32,070
You know what
used to drive me nuts?
261
00:08:32,104 --> 00:08:33,938
He is a total control freak.
262
00:08:33,973 --> 00:08:36,657
I mean, you have to put
a coaster down on every surface,
263
00:08:36,675 --> 00:08:38,176
and the worst part is,
they're all
264
00:08:38,227 --> 00:08:40,378
made out of pictures
from Diddy's Instagram.
265
00:08:40,413 --> 00:08:42,330
Diddy's on Instagram?
266
00:08:42,348 --> 00:08:45,884
How did I not know that Diddy
was on Instagram, you jagweeds?
267
00:08:45,918 --> 00:08:48,336
- Who are you yelling at?
- The jagweeds.
268
00:08:48,370 --> 00:08:50,422
Why are you
still in front of me?
269
00:08:51,456 --> 00:08:53,491
- ♪ Everything that used to...
- I'm done with that band.
270
00:08:53,526 --> 00:08:55,593
I mean, I'm an adult now,
you know?
271
00:08:55,644 --> 00:08:58,496
I work two part-time jobs.
Hello.
272
00:08:58,531 --> 00:08:59,781
I don't need the stress
273
00:08:59,815 --> 00:09:01,850
of playing guitar
with my friends every few weeks.
274
00:09:02,184 --> 00:09:04,602
Yeah, plus look how bad
they are without you.
275
00:09:05,153 --> 00:09:06,154
Burly's terrible.
276
00:09:06,438 --> 00:09:08,523
He actually has
a really beautiful voice
277
00:09:08,557 --> 00:09:09,774
for a backup singer.
278
00:09:09,808 --> 00:09:11,542
Right,
that's what I meant.
279
00:09:11,576 --> 00:09:13,945
I love Andy,
but to be perfectly honest,
280
00:09:13,979 --> 00:09:15,463
Mouse Rat's music
is not my thing.
281
00:09:15,497 --> 00:09:17,815
I really only listen to,
like, German Death Reggae
282
00:09:17,850 --> 00:09:20,635
and Halloween sound effects
records from the 1950s.
283
00:09:20,686 --> 00:09:21,886
And Bette Midler.
284
00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:24,022
Obviously.
285
00:09:24,056 --> 00:09:25,873
You know what,
I'm retiring from music.
286
00:09:25,924 --> 00:09:27,525
- Andy. Andy.
- Done.
287
00:09:27,559 --> 00:09:28,810
But not without first
288
00:09:28,861 --> 00:09:32,780
a monster farewell
performance solo
289
00:09:32,815 --> 00:09:35,116
on this stage tonight,
everybody.
290
00:09:35,150 --> 00:09:37,318
I'ma show these idiots
what a big mistake they made.
291
00:09:37,353 --> 00:09:40,204
I need piece of paper, I need
a pen, I need four more beers,
292
00:09:40,239 --> 00:09:42,857
I need a computer fan, I need
a lightning bolt of inspiration.
293
00:09:42,908 --> 00:09:43,958
It's song writing time.
294
00:09:43,992 --> 00:09:45,943
What do you need
a computer fan for?
295
00:09:45,978 --> 00:09:49,063
Sometimes when you use
a computer, it gets hot,
296
00:09:49,098 --> 00:09:52,166
and the fan
cools it down.
297
00:09:53,201 --> 00:09:54,252
You know,
I think it's great
298
00:09:54,286 --> 00:09:56,387
that you're cool
with Tom's financial situation.
299
00:09:56,422 --> 00:09:57,438
What are you talking about?
300
00:09:57,489 --> 00:10:00,091
Tommy owns his own business.
[Chuckles]
301
00:10:00,125 --> 00:10:01,976
Yeah, but he had
to borrow a lot of money,
302
00:10:02,010 --> 00:10:03,961
and when you're not around,
303
00:10:03,996 --> 00:10:06,697
Tom drinks tap water.
304
00:10:06,732 --> 00:10:07,915
[Shrieks]
What?
305
00:10:07,950 --> 00:10:09,951
Excuse me.
306
00:10:09,985 --> 00:10:11,769
You're broke?
307
00:10:11,787 --> 00:10:14,205
Uh, yeah, super broke.
Are you upset about that?
308
00:10:14,223 --> 00:10:16,991
Mm, yeah, 'cause I don't
eff with poorsies.
309
00:10:17,042 --> 00:10:20,011
But thanks to a warning
from my new best friend,
310
00:10:20,045 --> 00:10:21,362
I don't have to, okay?
311
00:10:21,397 --> 00:10:23,447
We're done,
you're awesome,
312
00:10:23,465 --> 00:10:25,600
and I don't even usually
like Puerto Rican chicks.
313
00:10:25,634 --> 00:10:27,301
I'm not--I mean,
it shouldn't matter, but I'm--
314
00:10:27,352 --> 00:10:28,853
You're breaking up
with me?
315
00:10:28,871 --> 00:10:31,873
- Oh, man, that sucks.
- That's right. It's over.
316
00:10:31,907 --> 00:10:33,341
Let's go dance.
317
00:10:33,392 --> 00:10:34,561
Help.
318
00:10:37,295 --> 00:10:39,630
Ugh, I cannot catch
a break.
319
00:10:39,664 --> 00:10:41,482
You better find
your stroke, Knope.
320
00:10:41,517 --> 00:10:43,034
Guys, I'm gonna
let Julie go home.
321
00:10:43,068 --> 00:10:45,303
It's getting late, and Jeremy's
eaten all the syrup.
322
00:10:45,337 --> 00:10:46,504
Thank you.
323
00:10:46,538 --> 00:10:47,572
It's been an honor
working alongside you.
324
00:10:47,606 --> 00:10:49,290
- Thanks.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up.
325
00:10:49,341 --> 00:10:50,992
Snow cones
are half the fun.
326
00:10:51,026 --> 00:10:52,426
Yeah, Julie,
could you stay, please?
327
00:10:52,428 --> 00:10:54,311
I have calculus homework.
I--
328
00:10:54,329 --> 00:10:56,364
Oh, well, math is worthless
in real life.
329
00:10:56,398 --> 00:10:58,433
I mean, there's an app
for calculating tips.
330
00:10:58,467 --> 00:10:59,416
That's all you need.
331
00:10:59,435 --> 00:11:00,601
Math is very important,
332
00:11:00,652 --> 00:11:02,069
especially for young women.
Stay in school.
333
00:11:02,121 --> 00:11:04,939
I've made my point.
Leslie has made hers.
334
00:11:04,990 --> 00:11:07,225
Which way are you voting,
Councilman?
335
00:11:07,259 --> 00:11:08,820
Uh, well, I'm kind of
still on the fence
336
00:11:08,861 --> 00:11:10,194
about this budget thing,
337
00:11:10,228 --> 00:11:12,930
but I do love watching
you guys squabble over me.
338
00:11:12,948 --> 00:11:14,882
You sure make a guy feel
like a real lady.
339
00:11:14,917 --> 00:11:15,917
Weird.
340
00:11:15,951 --> 00:11:17,501
All right,
how about this?
341
00:11:17,519 --> 00:11:19,086
You two play each other.
342
00:11:19,121 --> 00:11:21,255
Nine holes.
Winner gets my vote.
343
00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:23,407
I'm game. Ron?
344
00:11:23,441 --> 00:11:25,293
An athletic competition
where both parties
345
00:11:25,344 --> 00:11:27,962
are competing their hardest
is certainly more honorable
346
00:11:27,996 --> 00:11:29,547
than whatever
this charade is.
347
00:11:29,581 --> 00:11:30,982
Sudden death playoff
348
00:11:31,016 --> 00:11:32,817
on the very course
that hangs in the balance.
349
00:11:32,851 --> 00:11:35,036
I could literally faint
350
00:11:35,070 --> 00:11:36,604
if I didn't
have impeccable blood pressure.
351
00:11:36,638 --> 00:11:38,573
[Cracks knuckles]
352
00:11:38,607 --> 00:11:39,907
Oh, hey, everybody.
353
00:11:39,942 --> 00:11:42,009
My name is Andy Dwyer.
354
00:11:42,044 --> 00:11:44,495
You probably know me
as the artist formerly known
355
00:11:44,529 --> 00:11:46,330
as the lead singer
of Mouse Rat.
356
00:11:46,365 --> 00:11:49,984
Well, after tonight, you'll only
know me as the former artist
357
00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:53,538
formerly known
as the lead singer of Mouse Rat.
358
00:11:53,572 --> 00:11:55,273
I'm retiring from music.
359
00:11:55,307 --> 00:11:58,559
This is my swan song.
360
00:12:01,330 --> 00:12:03,948
♪ Once I was
a golden swan ♪
361
00:12:03,982 --> 00:12:06,200
♪ swan of a man
362
00:12:06,251 --> 00:12:08,469
♪ now that swan's name
was Andy ♪
363
00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:10,872
♪ and he started
a rock and roll band ♪
364
00:12:10,906 --> 00:12:13,791
♪ he made
incredible nachos ♪
365
00:12:13,825 --> 00:12:16,477
♪ that everybody claimed
they loved ♪
366
00:12:16,512 --> 00:12:19,614
♪ and then the band mates
dicked him over ♪
367
00:12:19,648 --> 00:12:22,900
♪ with a massive
rock and roll shove ♪
368
00:12:22,935 --> 00:12:25,353
♪ this is my swan song
369
00:12:25,387 --> 00:12:26,888
♪ watch me fly
370
00:12:27,922 --> 00:12:29,774
- Tom.
- What happened to you?
371
00:12:29,808 --> 00:12:31,242
Mona-Lisa happened to me.
372
00:12:31,260 --> 00:12:33,477
She covered me in glitter
and Anna Nicole body spray.
373
00:12:33,512 --> 00:12:35,413
Why do they still
even make that?
374
00:12:35,447 --> 00:12:37,131
They don't--she's had
the same bottle for years.
375
00:12:37,182 --> 00:12:39,033
She just mixes in
water and baby oil.
376
00:12:39,067 --> 00:12:40,784
Now it's your turn
to help me, okay?
377
00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:43,070
You need to break things off
with me and Mona-Lisa.
378
00:12:43,105 --> 00:12:44,989
Uh, Ann,
this might be a battle
379
00:12:45,023 --> 00:12:45,973
you need to fight yourself.
380
00:12:46,008 --> 00:12:47,091
I try not to get involved
381
00:12:47,125 --> 00:12:48,125
in other people's
personal relationships.
382
00:12:48,143 --> 00:12:49,610
Aah! Don't hurt me.
383
00:12:49,645 --> 00:12:51,062
Get me
out of this friendship!
384
00:12:51,096 --> 00:12:52,964
♪ I'm gonna find a place
385
00:12:52,998 --> 00:12:54,849
♪ where I can be
the beautiful duckling ♪
386
00:12:54,883 --> 00:12:58,953
♪ I always was inside
387
00:12:58,987 --> 00:13:01,973
♪ whoa
388
00:13:02,007 --> 00:13:04,642
♪ whoa
389
00:13:04,660 --> 00:13:07,228
[sobbing]
♪ whoa
390
00:13:07,262 --> 00:13:08,980
[wails]
391
00:13:09,514 --> 00:13:13,067
Why is there a gorilla
guarding this gingerbread house?
392
00:13:13,101 --> 00:13:14,485
Because mini-golf
is awesome.
393
00:13:14,519 --> 00:13:16,479
It's cute, and it's fun,
and it needs to be saved.
394
00:13:16,521 --> 00:13:18,992
Less talk.
More competing for my vote.
395
00:13:21,126 --> 00:13:22,827
[Chime rings]
396
00:13:22,861 --> 00:13:23,927
Wow.
397
00:13:23,946 --> 00:13:25,246
This is it.
398
00:13:25,280 --> 00:13:26,730
Ron leads by one.
399
00:13:26,748 --> 00:13:28,599
If he hits the ball
into the dragon's mouth,
400
00:13:28,634 --> 00:13:29,750
he gets Jamm's vote.
401
00:13:29,801 --> 00:13:31,185
Uh, bean sprouts.
402
00:13:31,219 --> 00:13:33,237
Tofu.
Ralph Nader.
403
00:13:33,272 --> 00:13:35,356
Ayn Rand
is a terrible writer.
404
00:13:35,407 --> 00:13:38,376
Don't mess up, don't mess up,
don't mess up.
405
00:13:38,410 --> 00:13:39,543
[Dragon hisses]
406
00:13:39,578 --> 00:13:40,544
- Damn it!
- Hole- in-one!
407
00:13:40,579 --> 00:13:41,829
Excellent win, Ron.
408
00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:43,614
Even better loss, Leslie.
409
00:13:43,632 --> 00:13:45,466
Ultimately, we learn
the most about ourselves
410
00:13:45,500 --> 00:13:47,134
through the losses.
411
00:13:47,169 --> 00:13:48,135
Swanson, I hate you.
412
00:13:48,170 --> 00:13:49,553
Nothing will change that.
413
00:13:49,588 --> 00:13:51,789
But I respect the hell
out of your short game.
414
00:13:52,507 --> 00:13:53,957
You got my vote, hombre.
415
00:13:54,476 --> 00:13:56,594
Hey, you got
a hole-in-one on 18,
416
00:13:56,628 --> 00:13:58,145
so I'm supposed
to give you this.
417
00:13:58,180 --> 00:14:01,298
No, he gets
the dragon too?
418
00:14:01,316 --> 00:14:02,466
A fine trophy.
419
00:14:02,484 --> 00:14:03,901
I think I'll keep it
in the office.
420
00:14:03,935 --> 00:14:05,135
No, you won't.
421
00:14:05,153 --> 00:14:06,320
- Here, kid, want this, huh?
- Yeah.
422
00:14:06,355 --> 00:14:08,356
Take it and run.
Run!
423
00:14:11,062 --> 00:14:12,996
Tom, she's coming!
Tom!
424
00:14:13,014 --> 00:14:14,631
Okay, desperation time.
Follow my lead.
425
00:14:14,699 --> 00:14:15,682
What lead?
What do you mean?
426
00:14:15,700 --> 00:14:17,667
What are you--
oh.
427
00:14:17,718 --> 00:14:22,339
What the mother-effing, c-ing
ess-ing, effing k-ing eff
428
00:14:22,373 --> 00:14:23,757
is going on right now?
429
00:14:23,791 --> 00:14:24,875
Sorry, Mona-Lisa.
430
00:14:24,909 --> 00:14:26,359
We can't keep our hands
off each other.
431
00:14:26,393 --> 00:14:27,727
That is accurate.
432
00:14:27,762 --> 00:14:29,746
Oh, it's all
finally very clear.
433
00:14:29,780 --> 00:14:31,648
All the times
that you were like,
434
00:14:31,682 --> 00:14:32,983
"Oh, no,
Tom's no good for you."
435
00:14:33,017 --> 00:14:35,085
And all the times you tried
to break it off with me...
436
00:14:35,136 --> 00:14:36,820
- I finally get it.
- Mmhmm.
437
00:14:36,854 --> 00:14:38,788
You guys want
a threesome.
438
00:14:38,823 --> 00:14:41,107
What? No. We do not wanna
have a threesome with you.
439
00:14:41,125 --> 00:14:43,059
Well, let's not
rush to judgment.
440
00:14:43,094 --> 00:14:45,462
- I mean, I say we hear her out.
- Gross.
441
00:14:45,496 --> 00:14:46,529
Tom, good luck.
442
00:14:46,564 --> 00:14:47,981
You still owe me
a blanket.
443
00:14:48,015 --> 00:14:49,167
[Laughs]
444
00:14:49,215 --> 00:14:51,301
She's got a screw loose,
am I right?
445
00:14:51,335 --> 00:14:52,269
Actually she's not the one
446
00:14:52,303 --> 00:14:53,737
in my life
I would call crazy.
447
00:14:53,788 --> 00:14:55,288
Look, I still don't
think we should date.
448
00:14:55,323 --> 00:14:56,423
Oh, me neither.
449
00:14:56,457 --> 00:14:57,424
I've been single
for an hour now,
450
00:14:57,458 --> 00:14:59,776
and it's the tits!
[Chuckles]
451
00:14:59,810 --> 00:15:00,927
I'd still like
to hook up though.
452
00:15:01,462 --> 00:15:05,966
Yo, do you wanna have
a threesome with us?
453
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:07,284
Yeah, okay.
454
00:15:07,318 --> 00:15:08,518
- Cool.
- Sweet.
455
00:15:08,552 --> 00:15:09,569
- All right.
- All right.
456
00:15:09,604 --> 00:15:10,638
Yo, what up?
My name is Mona-Lisa.
457
00:15:12,172 --> 00:15:14,207
Well, hello,
fellow employees.
458
00:15:14,225 --> 00:15:15,942
Co-workers,
I bid you adieu.
459
00:15:15,977 --> 00:15:17,928
Whoa, fancy Andy.
460
00:15:17,962 --> 00:15:19,045
Oh, me?
No.
461
00:15:19,063 --> 00:15:20,814
This is just
how I dress now.
462
00:15:20,848 --> 00:15:24,517
Funny goofball music Andy...
[lmitates fart]
463
00:15:24,535 --> 00:15:26,052
is gone.
464
00:15:26,087 --> 00:15:28,388
You're left
with the professional remains.
465
00:15:28,422 --> 00:15:29,723
I'm an adult now.
466
00:15:29,757 --> 00:15:31,141
I'm gonna focus on business,
which is good.
467
00:15:31,175 --> 00:15:33,059
Give me more time
to play video games.
468
00:15:33,093 --> 00:15:38,114
Babe, you love that band
that I also love so much.
469
00:15:38,149 --> 00:15:40,250
They're important to you.
470
00:15:40,284 --> 00:15:42,969
Come on, call Burly
and ask him to let you back in.
471
00:15:43,004 --> 00:15:44,321
Why, so they
can steal my swan song?
472
00:15:44,355 --> 00:15:46,506
Ha, joke's on them.
I forgot it.
473
00:15:46,540 --> 00:15:48,775
No, business
is my life now.
474
00:15:49,093 --> 00:15:51,211
- Okay, what's in there?
- I don't know.
475
00:15:51,245 --> 00:15:52,612
I-it's locked.
476
00:15:52,647 --> 00:15:54,731
- Yeah, that's my briefcase.
- Is it?
477
00:15:54,765 --> 00:15:56,000
[Whistles]
478
00:15:56,305 --> 00:15:57,300
Good gravy.
479
00:15:57,335 --> 00:15:58,418
Oh, hello, Ron.
480
00:15:58,452 --> 00:16:00,020
I believe
you know this gorilla.
481
00:16:00,054 --> 00:16:02,856
It used to bring joy
to hundreds of Pawnee families,
482
00:16:02,890 --> 00:16:04,791
but then you got rid
of its habitat, so it died.
483
00:16:04,809 --> 00:16:07,544
Your office shall serve
as its monkey tomb.
484
00:16:07,578 --> 00:16:09,295
- How much did you pay for this?
- Irrelevant.
485
00:16:09,313 --> 00:16:11,731
I would pay any amount
of money to properly shame you.
486
00:16:11,765 --> 00:16:13,984
Leslie, you should know by now
that I live my life
487
00:16:14,018 --> 00:16:15,802
according to a certain set
of principles,
488
00:16:15,820 --> 00:16:18,071
and I do not deviate
from them.
489
00:16:18,105 --> 00:16:20,674
Right, I mean, God forbid
you're flexible in any way.
490
00:16:20,708 --> 00:16:22,875
You should just stick
to your stupid, rigid,
491
00:16:22,893 --> 00:16:24,577
anti-government principles.
492
00:16:24,612 --> 00:16:26,479
But you know what?
Those principles stink.
493
00:16:26,514 --> 00:16:27,914
They're not
the right principles.
494
00:16:27,932 --> 00:16:29,699
You may think so.
I do not.
495
00:16:29,734 --> 00:16:31,935
Thank you
for my new silver-backed friend.
496
00:16:31,969 --> 00:16:33,803
I like him very much.
497
00:16:33,838 --> 00:16:38,258
I will call him "$9,000
of taxpayer money the gorilla."
498
00:16:38,292 --> 00:16:40,861
That is a terrible--
his name is Mr. Fuzzyface!
499
00:16:41,879 --> 00:16:43,646
[Door slams]
500
00:16:44,681 --> 00:16:45,281
Hey.
501
00:16:45,316 --> 00:16:49,102
How did your wild dirtbag
fantasy night work out?
502
00:16:49,136 --> 00:16:51,588
Well, Mona-Lisa and the random
girl she grabbed after you left
503
00:16:51,622 --> 00:16:54,157
got into a fistfight
in the parking lot.
504
00:16:54,191 --> 00:16:55,792
Eventually, Mona-Lisa
threw a cinderblock
505
00:16:55,826 --> 00:16:56,876
through the girl's windshield.
506
00:16:56,911 --> 00:16:58,678
She dives in,
steals her purse,
507
00:16:58,712 --> 00:17:01,364
doesn't go for the money,
steals all her birth control pills,
508
00:17:01,399 --> 00:17:02,916
and says, "Bitch,
you're gonna get pregnant."
509
00:17:02,950 --> 00:17:05,368
She then pretends
those are ecstasy
510
00:17:05,419 --> 00:17:06,939
and sells it
to a bunch of college kids
511
00:17:06,954 --> 00:17:09,272
that are drinking
Goldschläger at a gas station.
512
00:17:09,306 --> 00:17:11,491
You have to break up
with her.
513
00:17:11,525 --> 00:17:12,675
I tried. Again.
514
00:17:12,710 --> 00:17:13,977
It did not go well.
515
00:17:14,011 --> 00:17:15,562
Did she assault you?
516
00:17:15,596 --> 00:17:19,015
- No, this was a sexual injury.
- Okay, gross.
517
00:17:19,066 --> 00:17:20,850
Anyway, here's
your chenille blanket.
518
00:17:20,885 --> 00:17:21,835
You earned it.
519
00:17:21,869 --> 00:17:22,786
Thanks for your help.
520
00:17:22,837 --> 00:17:24,087
Tom, thank you.
521
00:17:24,121 --> 00:17:25,739
Eh, be nice
to Chenille O'Neal.
522
00:17:25,773 --> 00:17:26,906
I will.
523
00:17:26,941 --> 00:17:27,907
It needs
to be brushed regularly.
524
00:17:27,942 --> 00:17:28,902
Never use a lint roller.
525
00:17:28,909 --> 00:17:30,894
- I'm dead serious.
- Okay.
526
00:17:30,928 --> 00:17:31,895
And keep it out
of direct sunlight.
527
00:17:31,946 --> 00:17:33,747
If I see this
at one picnic, I swear--
528
00:17:33,781 --> 00:17:34,998
Okay, you know what,
I don't even want it anymore.
529
00:17:35,049 --> 00:17:36,232
Yes!
530
00:17:36,267 --> 00:17:37,734
Thank you!
531
00:17:37,768 --> 00:17:40,303
[Knock on door]
What's up, yellow head?
532
00:17:40,354 --> 00:17:42,322
Jamm, are you here
to rub it in my face
533
00:17:42,356 --> 00:17:43,773
that I lost
your vote last night?
534
00:17:43,808 --> 00:17:48,461
Well, I was, but it doesn't
have to go down that way.
535
00:17:48,496 --> 00:17:50,613
You shook Ron's hand
and told him
536
00:17:50,648 --> 00:17:52,248
that you were gonna vote
to close the putt-putt.
537
00:17:52,283 --> 00:17:53,833
My word is garbage.
[Chuckles]
538
00:17:53,867 --> 00:17:54,884
Everyone knows that.
539
00:17:54,919 --> 00:17:56,186
Let's talk deal.
540
00:17:56,237 --> 00:17:59,806
What can you offer me
to change my mind?
541
00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:03,076
Wow, Jamm, even for you,
this is pretty sleazy.
542
00:18:03,110 --> 00:18:04,377
Hey, don't act
so shocked.
543
00:18:04,411 --> 00:18:06,913
A few months ago,
you traded me your office
544
00:18:06,947 --> 00:18:08,331
for that stupid
swimming pool bill.
545
00:18:08,365 --> 00:18:10,416
Last night you bring in
a teenage girl
546
00:18:10,451 --> 00:18:13,119
to pump me
full of snow cones.
547
00:18:13,154 --> 00:18:16,973
This is simply
how people like us operate.
548
00:18:17,507 --> 00:18:19,642
I have six things
to say to you.
549
00:18:19,677 --> 00:18:22,629
One: You drive me nuts
with your rigid code of honor.
550
00:18:22,663 --> 00:18:25,048
Two: Congratulations,
putt-putt has been defunded.
551
00:18:25,082 --> 00:18:27,467
And only because Jamm
was going to double-cross you,
552
00:18:27,501 --> 00:18:29,202
and I made him
stick to his word.
553
00:18:29,220 --> 00:18:32,005
Three: I am furious that
putt-putt has been defunded.
554
00:18:32,039 --> 00:18:33,339
Four: I am sorry
that I said
555
00:18:33,373 --> 00:18:34,707
the gorilla's blood
was on your hands.
556
00:18:34,725 --> 00:18:36,092
'Twas Leslie killed
the beast.
557
00:18:36,143 --> 00:18:38,845
Five: Putt-putt is for children,
and they are the future,
558
00:18:38,879 --> 00:18:40,563
and I have already written
a ballot measure
559
00:18:40,598 --> 00:18:42,315
that will save it,
and it will pass.
560
00:18:42,349 --> 00:18:45,735
And six: Your rigid code
of honor, which drives me nuts,
561
00:18:45,769 --> 00:18:47,320
makes you
a wonderful human being,
562
00:18:47,354 --> 00:18:48,321
and I am proud
to call you my friend,
563
00:18:48,355 --> 00:18:49,889
and don't ever change.
564
00:18:49,907 --> 00:18:52,325
- You want a drink?
- Very much.
565
00:18:55,605 --> 00:18:58,004
Burly,
I just want to say I'm sorry
566
00:18:58,005 --> 00:18:59,306
that I haven't been to rehearsal
567
00:18:59,324 --> 00:19:01,475
and that I won't
let you sing or write songs
568
00:19:01,493 --> 00:19:03,193
or walk out onstage
in front of me.
569
00:19:03,494 --> 00:19:05,028
Man, I love playing
with you guys.
570
00:19:05,562 --> 00:19:07,281
And I want back in
if you'll let me.
571
00:19:07,332 --> 00:19:08,665
Well, we never
wanted to kick you out.
572
00:19:08,700 --> 00:19:10,167
It's just, you didn't
show up for practice,
573
00:19:10,201 --> 00:19:11,451
- and we like to play.
- Right.
574
00:19:11,902 --> 00:19:14,254
If you wanna come back in,
you can.
575
00:19:14,289 --> 00:19:15,539
I'm more
of a backup singer anyways.
576
00:19:15,573 --> 00:19:16,573
You can say that again.
577
00:19:16,574 --> 00:19:17,541
No, no, no.
578
00:19:17,575 --> 00:19:18,842
Hey, you got a great voice.
579
00:19:18,876 --> 00:19:19,843
Yeah, Ben!
580
00:19:19,877 --> 00:19:21,411
God, don't say that.
581
00:19:21,429 --> 00:19:23,079
- Welcome back, buddy.
- Yes.
582
00:19:23,097 --> 00:19:24,096
[Laughs]
583
00:19:24,097 --> 00:19:25,182
All right!
584
00:19:25,216 --> 00:19:26,883
Hey, I'll even try melting
the cheese on the nachos.
585
00:19:26,917 --> 00:19:27,884
All right.
586
00:19:27,918 --> 00:19:29,052
It won't work.
587
00:19:29,086 --> 00:19:31,388
You're gonna look
like such an idiot.
588
00:19:31,672 --> 00:19:34,007
I have been in the city
council for almost a year,
589
00:19:34,025 --> 00:19:35,265
and I'm proud
of what I've done.
590
00:19:35,276 --> 00:19:37,360
But every once in a while,
I end up in a situation
591
00:19:37,395 --> 00:19:38,845
that makes my stomach queasy.
592
00:19:38,863 --> 00:19:41,147
You're in politics.
What did you expect?
593
00:19:41,181 --> 00:19:43,316
Frankly, I hoped it would
be like dealing with you.
594
00:19:43,350 --> 00:19:47,737
People with strong opinions
hashing it out respectfully.
595
00:19:47,788 --> 00:19:49,956
And then you either
realize that I'm right
596
00:19:49,991 --> 00:19:52,826
or you get hungry
and go home and I win.
597
00:19:52,860 --> 00:19:54,277
There are
a lot of Jeremy Jamms
598
00:19:54,312 --> 00:19:56,079
along the path
you're walking.
599
00:19:56,130 --> 00:19:57,964
I suppose you just
need to figure out
600
00:19:57,999 --> 00:20:00,217
whether it's a path
you truly wanna walk.
601
00:20:00,251 --> 00:20:03,386
Yeah.
602
00:20:03,421 --> 00:20:04,971
I'm taking
that gorilla with me
603
00:20:05,006 --> 00:20:06,056
and putting it back
in the putt-putt
604
00:20:06,090 --> 00:20:08,642
- when it reopens.
- Sorry, no.
605
00:20:08,676 --> 00:20:10,227
That gorilla was a gift
606
00:20:10,261 --> 00:20:13,179
from a very determined co-worker
whom I respect.
607
00:20:13,213 --> 00:20:15,348
And there's
a certain code of honor
608
00:20:15,382 --> 00:20:16,716
that accompanies gift-giving.
609
00:20:16,734 --> 00:20:19,402
God, you're the worst.
610
00:20:21,438 --> 00:20:22,455
Ladies and gentlemen,
611
00:20:22,489 --> 00:20:24,941
welcome to Mouse Rat's
Reunion Show,
612
00:20:24,976 --> 00:20:27,794
featuring me, Andy Dwyer,
and for the first time,
613
00:20:27,828 --> 00:20:31,047
Andrew "Burly" Burlinson
on lead vocals.
614
00:20:31,098 --> 00:20:33,183
That's right,
two lead vocalists.
615
00:20:33,217 --> 00:20:35,518
Name one other band
that's done that.
616
00:20:35,553 --> 00:20:37,954
The Beatles.
617
00:20:38,189 --> 00:20:39,639
Three, four!
618
00:20:39,673 --> 00:20:43,343
[Rock music]
619
00:20:43,561 --> 00:20:47,063
Both: ♪ Oh I know
we had bad times ♪
620
00:20:47,414 --> 00:20:51,067
♪ but we had good times too
621
00:20:51,068 --> 00:20:55,067
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com