1
00:00:02,235 --> 00:00:03,902
The interface
is pretty simple.
2
00:00:03,904 --> 00:00:06,187
You put your horizontal "X"
coordinate here,
3
00:00:06,189 --> 00:00:08,223
vertical "Y"
coordinate here.
4
00:00:08,225 --> 00:00:10,559
When you're happy with those,
you press this button.
5
00:00:10,561 --> 00:00:12,744
Got it.
6
00:00:15,999 --> 00:00:19,034
Leonard, you'll never guess
who I just found online-- Hey!
7
00:00:21,554 --> 00:00:23,055
Nice shot.
8
00:00:23,057 --> 00:00:25,440
Eh, his giant head
did most of the work.
9
00:00:25,442 --> 00:00:27,559
Very mature.
10
00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:30,062
You're lucky
I'm out of Silly String.
11
00:00:31,213 --> 00:00:32,647
As I was saying, Leonard,
12
00:00:32,649 --> 00:00:36,018
you'll never guess who I just
found online: Professor Proton.
13
00:00:36,020 --> 00:00:37,052
(chuckles):
You're kidding.
14
00:00:37,054 --> 00:00:38,186
He's still alive?
15
00:00:38,188 --> 00:00:39,387
Yes!
16
00:00:39,389 --> 00:00:40,555
Who's Professor Proton?
17
00:00:40,557 --> 00:00:42,941
He was the host
of this great-- Hey!
18
00:00:42,943 --> 00:00:44,409
Yes!
19
00:00:44,411 --> 00:00:46,061
Sorry, tell me
about Professor Proton.
20
00:00:46,063 --> 00:00:48,530
Professor Proton hosted
my favorite science show
21
00:00:48,532 --> 00:00:49,948
when I was a child.
22
00:00:49,950 --> 00:00:51,666
I never missed
an episode.
23
00:00:51,668 --> 00:00:54,002
He demonstrated
scientific principles
24
00:00:54,004 --> 00:00:55,087
using everyday objects.
25
00:00:55,089 --> 00:00:56,338
It was pretty cool.
26
00:00:56,340 --> 00:01:00,042
Aw, so cute when you use
the word "cool" wrong.
27
00:01:00,793 --> 00:01:03,428
Like when kids say "pasghetti."
28
00:01:03,430 --> 00:01:05,297
Oh, dear Lord!
29
00:01:05,299 --> 00:01:06,515
Leonard, look!
30
00:01:06,517 --> 00:01:09,184
He's still available
for parties and events.
31
00:01:09,186 --> 00:01:10,469
We should hire him.
32
00:01:10,471 --> 00:01:12,020
Hire him to do what?
33
00:01:12,022 --> 00:01:13,722
Well, whatever
we want.
34
00:01:13,724 --> 00:01:16,141
Hang out, do
experiments,
35
00:01:16,143 --> 00:01:17,526
make him take 12
pictures with us
36
00:01:17,528 --> 00:01:19,027
so we can make
a calendar.
37
00:01:19,979 --> 00:01:21,813
It would be pretty awesome
to hang out with him.
38
00:01:21,815 --> 00:01:24,282
I just used "awesome" wrong,
didn't I?
39
00:01:25,368 --> 00:01:27,369
Well, I'm e-mailing
him right now.
40
00:01:27,371 --> 00:01:29,371
Do you remember
his old theme song?
41
00:01:29,373 --> 00:01:30,739
Of course I do.
42
00:01:30,741 --> 00:01:32,991
♪ Grab your goggles,
put your lab coat on ♪
43
00:01:32,993 --> 00:01:36,711
♪ Here he comes,
Professor Proton. ♪
44
00:01:37,830 --> 00:01:41,500
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
45
00:01:41,502 --> 00:01:44,586
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
46
00:01:44,588 --> 00:01:46,388
♪ The Earth began to cool
47
00:01:46,390 --> 00:01:48,824
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
48
00:01:48,826 --> 00:01:51,309
♪ We built the Wall
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
49
00:01:51,311 --> 00:01:53,929
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
50
00:01:53,931 --> 00:01:56,064
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
51
00:01:56,066 --> 00:01:58,100
♪ Bang! ♪
52
00:01:58,101 --> 00:02:02,101
♪ The Big Bang Theory 6x22 ♪
The Proton Resurgence
Original Air Date on May 2, 2013
53
00:02:02,102 --> 00:02:07,102
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
54
00:02:07,136 --> 00:02:08,503
Hey, I just found out
55
00:02:08,505 --> 00:02:10,538
I have to be at
the telescope lab all weekend.
56
00:02:10,540 --> 00:02:12,840
Any chance you and Bernadette
could take care of my dog?
57
00:02:12,842 --> 00:02:14,609
Why don't you put her
in a kennel?
58
00:02:14,611 --> 00:02:17,478
Why don't you put your mother
in a home?
59
00:02:19,865 --> 00:02:23,401
To be honest,
she'd do better in the kennel.
60
00:02:24,169 --> 00:02:25,453
I'll talk to Bernie.
61
00:02:25,455 --> 00:02:26,621
I'm sure it's fine.
62
00:02:26,623 --> 00:02:27,672
Thank you.
63
00:02:27,674 --> 00:02:30,291
It's happening!
It's happening!
64
00:02:30,293 --> 00:02:32,627
Professor Proton is coming
to our house.
65
00:02:32,629 --> 00:02:33,928
You're kidding!
66
00:02:33,930 --> 00:02:37,382
You mean the guy who used
to host that lame kids show?
67
00:02:37,384 --> 00:02:40,268
And you just
got yourself uninvited.
68
00:02:40,270 --> 00:02:42,887
See? I told you I'd find
a tactful way to do that.
69
00:02:43,839 --> 00:02:45,890
How'd you get him to
come to your house?
70
00:02:45,892 --> 00:02:47,892
As Professor Proton
always says,
71
00:02:47,894 --> 00:02:50,144
"There is no problem
you can't solve
72
00:02:50,146 --> 00:02:51,813
if you use your noggin."
73
00:02:51,815 --> 00:02:54,181
And he wrote him a check.
Yeah, that, too. Big check.
74
00:02:57,453 --> 00:02:59,787
(singsong):
Uncle Howard!
75
00:03:03,859 --> 00:03:06,527
Cinnamon's here
for her sleepover party!
76
00:03:09,131 --> 00:03:12,266
You know if you had a stroke,
she'd eat you, right?
77
00:03:12,268 --> 00:03:16,004
And it would be my pleasure
to be her num-num.
78
00:03:18,640 --> 00:03:21,726
Okay, so what do I need to know
to take care of her?
79
00:03:21,728 --> 00:03:23,177
It's very simple.
80
00:03:23,179 --> 00:03:25,680
For breakfast, she has
an egg-white frittata.
81
00:03:25,682 --> 00:03:27,148
Feel free
to give her a choice
82
00:03:27,150 --> 00:03:29,383
of home fries or
an English muffin, but not both.
83
00:03:29,385 --> 00:03:31,552
We're watching our weight.
84
00:03:31,554 --> 00:03:33,271
Uh, for dinner,
something simple--
85
00:03:33,273 --> 00:03:36,691
a veal chop, some scampi,
whatever you like.
86
00:03:37,776 --> 00:03:39,527
Classy dog.
Yes.
87
00:03:39,529 --> 00:03:41,496
Also, don't forget
to close the toilet
88
00:03:41,498 --> 00:03:43,114
or she'll drink out of it.
89
00:03:43,116 --> 00:03:45,066
I feel for ya.
(chuckles)
90
00:03:45,068 --> 00:03:49,003
I've got a psychotic mommy, too.
91
00:03:54,043 --> 00:03:56,711
SHELDON:
Leonard, are you in bed?
92
00:03:58,213 --> 00:04:00,314
Yes.
93
00:04:00,316 --> 00:04:03,401
Me, too.
94
00:04:03,403 --> 00:04:05,720
Great.
95
00:04:05,722 --> 00:04:06,921
I can't sleep.
96
00:04:06,923 --> 00:04:08,106
(sighs)
97
00:04:08,108 --> 00:04:10,925
Well, I can, so shut up.
98
00:04:10,927 --> 00:04:14,378
Do you realize that
in less than nine hours,
99
00:04:14,380 --> 00:04:17,115
Arthur Jeffries,
aka Professor Proton,
100
00:04:17,117 --> 00:04:18,683
will be in our apartment?
101
00:04:18,685 --> 00:04:21,435
Sheldon, you know that
if you stay up all night,
102
00:04:21,437 --> 00:04:22,653
you're gonna be sleepy tomorrow.
103
00:04:22,655 --> 00:04:24,789
And a sleepy Sheldon
is a cranky Sheldon.
104
00:04:24,791 --> 00:04:26,157
And a cranky Sheldon...
105
00:04:26,159 --> 00:04:28,126
is actually no different than
a regular Sheldon.
106
00:04:28,128 --> 00:04:29,961
Good night!
107
00:04:33,549 --> 00:04:36,651
I'm thinking
of wearing a tuxedo.
108
00:04:36,653 --> 00:04:38,469
That's not ridiculous.
109
00:04:38,471 --> 00:04:40,922
Good night.
110
00:04:43,125 --> 00:04:46,144
Do you have cufflinks?
111
00:04:46,146 --> 00:04:47,311
No.
112
00:04:47,313 --> 00:04:49,464
Ah, just as well.
Where can you rent a tuxedo
113
00:04:49,466 --> 00:04:50,832
at 3:00 in the morning?
114
00:04:50,834 --> 00:04:53,317
Okay, good night.
115
00:04:56,121 --> 00:04:58,456
Nice to meet you,
Professor Proton.
116
00:04:59,958 --> 00:05:02,243
Nice to meet you,
Professor Proton.
117
00:05:03,028 --> 00:05:06,330
Nice to meet you,
Professor Proton.
118
00:05:07,199 --> 00:05:10,151
Nice to meet you,
Professor Proton.
119
00:05:10,153 --> 00:05:11,736
Nice to meet you, Prof...
120
00:05:11,738 --> 00:05:13,838
(slap)
Ow!
121
00:05:34,059 --> 00:05:37,345
Leonard?
122
00:05:37,347 --> 00:05:39,647
What?
123
00:05:39,649 --> 00:05:42,183
I still can't sleep.
124
00:05:44,403 --> 00:05:47,488
She really tuckered
herself out at the park, huh?
125
00:05:47,490 --> 00:05:49,357
Yeah, you two were so
cute playing together.
126
00:05:49,359 --> 00:05:51,409
It was kind of fun
throwing a ball
127
00:05:51,411 --> 00:05:54,712
and not having anyone
laugh at me.
128
00:05:54,714 --> 00:05:57,048
And you were sweet
not to throw it too far
129
00:05:57,050 --> 00:05:59,050
so she didn't wear out
her tiny legs.
130
00:05:59,052 --> 00:06:01,502
(chuckles):
Yeah, that's what I was doing.
131
00:06:02,921 --> 00:06:05,039
You know, there were
a few moments today
132
00:06:05,041 --> 00:06:07,308
when I almost felt like
we were a little family.
133
00:06:07,310 --> 00:06:08,809
Really?
Yeah.
134
00:06:08,811 --> 00:06:10,311
I never thought of
myself as a mom,
135
00:06:10,313 --> 00:06:12,313
but when the three of us
were out there having fun,
136
00:06:12,315 --> 00:06:14,098
I felt like maybe
someday we could do it.
137
00:06:14,100 --> 00:06:16,150
Of course we can.
138
00:06:17,636 --> 00:06:20,621
Especially if our baby's
as calm and quiet
139
00:06:20,623 --> 00:06:22,490
as little Cinna...
140
00:06:22,492 --> 00:06:24,792
Son of a bitch, she's gone!
141
00:06:24,794 --> 00:06:26,727
Where'd she go?!
142
00:06:26,729 --> 00:06:28,529
I don't know!
She didn't leave a note!
143
00:06:28,531 --> 00:06:30,164
You were the one
144
00:06:30,166 --> 00:06:32,566
who was supposed to put her
back in the stroller!
145
00:06:32,568 --> 00:06:33,751
No, I wasn't! You were!
146
00:06:33,753 --> 00:06:35,453
No, I wasn't!
Yes, you were!
147
00:06:35,455 --> 00:06:37,872
Yeah, well,
you throw like a girl!
148
00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:47,465
I'm getting worried.
149
00:06:47,467 --> 00:06:50,785
Relax, Sheldon, he's only
a few minutes late.
150
00:06:50,787 --> 00:06:53,688
Professor Proton was never late
when he was on TV.
151
00:06:53,690 --> 00:06:56,257
You know, every day, 4:00,
he was there.
152
00:06:57,759 --> 00:06:59,360
Unless tornadoes
were ripping apart East Texas,
153
00:06:59,362 --> 00:07:01,445
in which case,
we'd join him in progress.
154
00:07:02,564 --> 00:07:05,432
(cell phone ringing)
155
00:07:05,434 --> 00:07:07,618
It's him.
156
00:07:09,871 --> 00:07:12,573
Hello.
157
00:07:12,575 --> 00:07:14,158
Well, I see.
158
00:07:14,160 --> 00:07:15,960
Yes.
159
00:07:15,962 --> 00:07:18,779
All right, we can come get you.
160
00:07:18,781 --> 00:07:20,614
Yeah, well, see you soon.
161
00:07:20,616 --> 00:07:22,616
Bye.
Where is he?
162
00:07:22,618 --> 00:07:24,085
The third floor landing.
163
00:07:24,087 --> 00:07:27,255
The poor old guy's been walking
up the stairs for half an hour.
164
00:07:31,009 --> 00:07:32,643
It's really you.
165
00:07:37,399 --> 00:07:39,483
Mr. Jeffries, I am so sorry.
166
00:07:39,485 --> 00:07:41,819
We should've told you
about the broken elevator.
167
00:07:41,821 --> 00:07:43,738
I agree.
168
00:07:45,424 --> 00:07:49,160
Professor Proton,
it's an honor to meet you.
169
00:07:49,162 --> 00:07:51,145
Just-just call me Arthur.
170
00:07:51,147 --> 00:07:53,331
Leonard...
171
00:07:55,117 --> 00:07:56,367
...you hear that?
172
00:07:56,369 --> 00:07:57,568
Professor Proton said
173
00:07:57,570 --> 00:07:59,503
I should call him Arthur.
174
00:07:59,505 --> 00:08:01,505
That means we're friends.
175
00:08:01,507 --> 00:08:03,007
No.
176
00:08:03,009 --> 00:08:07,161
A friend would've-would've
told me about the elevator.
177
00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:11,432
Look at me.
178
00:08:13,168 --> 00:08:15,553
I can get as close
to you as I want
179
00:08:15,555 --> 00:08:18,306
without my mom saying
it's going to ruin my eyes.
180
00:08:21,777 --> 00:08:24,478
Is, uh, is he dangerous?
181
00:08:26,064 --> 00:08:28,399
Actually,
he's a genius.
182
00:08:28,401 --> 00:08:30,951
I am.
183
00:08:30,953 --> 00:08:34,688
Th-That doesn't answer
my question.
184
00:08:34,690 --> 00:08:37,291
Mr. Jeffries,
I'm-I'm Leonard.
185
00:08:37,293 --> 00:08:39,126
This is my
girlfriend, Penny.
186
00:08:39,128 --> 00:08:40,194
Hi.
187
00:08:40,196 --> 00:08:43,297
Hello.
188
00:08:44,383 --> 00:08:46,533
Well, I hope I haven't kept
189
00:08:46,535 --> 00:08:49,720
the kids waiting too long
for-for the show.
190
00:08:49,722 --> 00:08:51,505
Oh, no,
there are no kids.
191
00:08:51,507 --> 00:08:53,174
No, the-the show's for me.
192
00:08:54,542 --> 00:08:57,595
Come on. I'll race ya...
193
00:08:57,597 --> 00:08:58,979
Arthur.
194
00:09:02,734 --> 00:09:06,387
Is the, is the blonde girl
really your-your girlfriend?
195
00:09:06,389 --> 00:09:07,688
Yes, sir.
196
00:09:07,690 --> 00:09:10,074
You're the genius.
197
00:09:29,532 --> 00:09:32,067
So, do you do a lot
of appearances like this?
198
00:09:32,069 --> 00:09:33,835
It-It's hard to say.
199
00:09:33,837 --> 00:09:37,072
I'm-I'm still trying
to figure out what...
200
00:09:37,074 --> 00:09:40,425
what-what this is.
201
00:09:41,677 --> 00:09:43,678
We just wanted
to hang out with you
202
00:09:43,680 --> 00:09:45,764
and maybe learn
a little about your life.
203
00:09:45,766 --> 00:09:49,584
Well, there-there really isn't
too much to tell.
204
00:09:49,586 --> 00:09:52,521
After the TV show
was-was canceled,
205
00:09:52,523 --> 00:09:54,139
nobody in the scientific world
206
00:09:54,141 --> 00:09:56,525
would, uh, would take me
seriously.
207
00:09:56,527 --> 00:09:57,542
So I was forced
208
00:09:57,544 --> 00:10:00,779
to do these, uh,
children's parties
209
00:10:00,781 --> 00:10:03,448
to-to make a living.
210
00:10:03,450 --> 00:10:04,900
That's too bad.
211
00:10:04,902 --> 00:10:08,103
But still, working with kids--
it must be rewarding.
212
00:10:08,105 --> 00:10:11,156
You-you get bit a lot.
213
00:10:12,358 --> 00:10:15,276
Let me see
if-if I have this straight.
214
00:10:15,995 --> 00:10:18,463
You-you two are-are physicists,
215
00:10:18,465 --> 00:10:22,100
and-and you,
and you want me
216
00:10:22,102 --> 00:10:26,188
to do a children's...
science show?
217
00:10:26,190 --> 00:10:28,557
Yes.
218
00:10:29,542 --> 00:10:30,959
And if there's time,
219
00:10:30,961 --> 00:10:33,728
take 12 pictures with us
in seasonal clothing.
220
00:10:39,902 --> 00:10:41,336
You know,
221
00:10:41,338 --> 00:10:42,687
I'm a real scientist.
222
00:10:42,689 --> 00:10:46,408
I-I have a PhD
from Cornell University.
223
00:10:46,410 --> 00:10:47,409
Yeah, that's great.
224
00:10:47,411 --> 00:10:48,860
Did you bring
your puppet?
225
00:10:49,729 --> 00:10:53,231
No, no.
226
00:10:53,233 --> 00:10:56,701
I-I hate that puppet.
227
00:10:56,703 --> 00:10:59,004
Oh, no.
228
00:10:59,006 --> 00:11:01,323
How could anybody hate
229
00:11:01,325 --> 00:11:04,092
Gino the Neutrino?
230
00:11:04,094 --> 00:11:05,760
It's nice, huh?
231
00:11:05,762 --> 00:11:07,679
I got him for
20 bucks on eBay.
232
00:11:07,681 --> 00:11:10,331
(Italian accent):
Including a-shipping!
233
00:11:12,268 --> 00:11:15,437
I'm... I'm
awake, right?
234
00:11:18,691 --> 00:11:21,443
Th-This is happening?
235
00:11:24,280 --> 00:11:25,647
Cinnamon!
236
00:11:25,649 --> 00:11:27,182
Cinnamon!
237
00:11:27,184 --> 00:11:29,201
You know, maybe she doesn't
recognize her name
238
00:11:29,203 --> 00:11:31,820
because of Raj's accent.
239
00:11:31,822 --> 00:11:33,188
Good thinking.
240
00:11:33,190 --> 00:11:36,658
(Indian accent):
Cinnamon, come to Daddy!
241
00:11:37,793 --> 00:11:39,211
(Indian accent):
Cinnamon!
242
00:11:39,213 --> 00:11:41,663
Where are you,
my little lamb chop?
243
00:11:42,531 --> 00:11:43,582
Nice.
244
00:11:43,584 --> 00:11:45,217
(chuckles)
Thanks.
245
00:11:45,219 --> 00:11:47,869
When this all blows over,
remember that voice.
246
00:11:47,871 --> 00:11:50,472
It's kind of a turn-on.
247
00:11:51,340 --> 00:11:53,808
It turns you on
when I sound like Raj?
248
00:11:56,812 --> 00:11:59,898
Cinnamon!
249
00:12:01,067 --> 00:12:04,502
Okay, as-as I put
the egg on top,
250
00:12:04,504 --> 00:12:07,522
and-and the
flame goes out
251
00:12:07,524 --> 00:12:10,325
and-and the air pressure
decreases
252
00:12:10,327 --> 00:12:11,860
in-in the flask,
253
00:12:11,862 --> 00:12:15,297
what do you think will happen?
254
00:12:15,299 --> 00:12:16,698
I think I know.
255
00:12:16,700 --> 00:12:18,333
It's gonna get
sucked in.
256
00:12:19,235 --> 00:12:21,836
It's going to
get sucked in.
257
00:12:21,838 --> 00:12:24,539
Okay, I didn't know.
258
00:12:28,377 --> 00:12:29,878
Yes!
259
00:12:31,464 --> 00:12:33,798
See, I'm not
a scientist like them.
260
00:12:34,650 --> 00:12:37,052
I-I figured that out.
261
00:12:37,054 --> 00:12:40,355
Uh, potato clock.
Do potato clock.
262
00:12:40,357 --> 00:12:41,439
What's that?
263
00:12:41,441 --> 00:12:45,227
I-I power a clock
with a, with a potato.
264
00:12:45,229 --> 00:12:46,728
Shut up!
265
00:12:46,730 --> 00:12:48,530
You can do that?
266
00:12:50,816 --> 00:12:52,117
I mean...
267
00:12:52,119 --> 00:12:54,986
wouldn't that solve
the world's energy crisis?
268
00:12:57,290 --> 00:12:59,724
No.
269
00:13:00,876 --> 00:13:02,544
Look, guys,
270
00:13:02,546 --> 00:13:04,479
keep your money.
I-I think, uh...
271
00:13:04,481 --> 00:13:06,214
I-I think I'm done.
272
00:13:06,216 --> 00:13:07,749
What-what's wrong?
273
00:13:07,751 --> 00:13:09,284
Is she upsetting you?
274
00:13:09,286 --> 00:13:11,703
Because I can
make her go away.
275
00:13:11,705 --> 00:13:16,374
No, sh-she's the only reason
I've-I've stayed this long.
276
00:13:18,177 --> 00:13:19,561
Then what is it?
277
00:13:19,563 --> 00:13:21,012
I don't know.
278
00:13:21,014 --> 00:13:22,797
I think I'm just...
279
00:13:22,799 --> 00:13:25,300
I-I just,
I just don't want to be
280
00:13:25,302 --> 00:13:27,852
Professor Proton anymore.
281
00:13:27,854 --> 00:13:30,355
Well, how can you say that?
282
00:13:30,357 --> 00:13:32,741
Professor Proton's the best.
283
00:13:32,743 --> 00:13:35,777
What-what has it ever gotten me?
284
00:13:35,779 --> 00:13:38,613
I mean, I'm-I'm an 83-year-old
man who has...
285
00:13:38,615 --> 00:13:42,500
potatoes in-in his suitcase.
286
00:13:42,502 --> 00:13:45,537
Other scientists think-think
I'm a joke.
287
00:13:45,539 --> 00:13:46,671
And the...
288
00:13:46,673 --> 00:13:52,377
the puppeteer who did,
who did Gino...
289
00:13:52,379 --> 00:13:55,964
well, he also...
290
00:13:55,966 --> 00:13:58,433
did my wife.
291
00:14:02,972 --> 00:14:04,406
Mr. Jeffries,
292
00:14:04,408 --> 00:14:06,641
I need to show you something.
293
00:14:09,562 --> 00:14:11,446
I'm sorry to hear
about your troubles.
294
00:14:11,448 --> 00:14:12,731
Uh, thanks.
295
00:14:12,733 --> 00:14:14,032
But if you don't mind
296
00:14:14,034 --> 00:14:16,351
me asking,
uh, the potato clock--
297
00:14:16,353 --> 00:14:17,869
how does it work?
298
00:14:18,821 --> 00:14:22,941
Is it a trick clock
or a trick potato?
299
00:14:27,213 --> 00:14:30,632
Wh-What do you two talk about?
300
00:14:36,605 --> 00:14:40,225
I wrote a fan letter to you
when I was a child in Texas,
301
00:14:40,227 --> 00:14:44,979
and you sent this autographed
picture back to me.
302
00:14:44,981 --> 00:14:47,315
Do you remember that?
303
00:14:47,317 --> 00:14:49,601
I'll-I'll give you a hint:
304
00:14:49,603 --> 00:14:53,688
I have a bracelet
with my own address on it.
305
00:14:55,324 --> 00:14:57,575
Well, anyway, um,
306
00:14:57,577 --> 00:14:59,694
you may find this
hard to believe,
307
00:14:59,696 --> 00:15:02,664
but I didn't have
any friends growing up.
308
00:15:03,516 --> 00:15:05,917
No, I-I get that.
309
00:15:08,220 --> 00:15:11,539
But, um, I
did have you.
310
00:15:11,541 --> 00:15:13,925
And every
day at 4:00,
311
00:15:13,927 --> 00:15:16,594
you'd come to my
house on Channel 68,
312
00:15:16,596 --> 00:15:18,680
and we'd do
science together.
313
00:15:18,682 --> 00:15:21,132
If it hadn't
been for you,
314
00:15:21,134 --> 00:15:22,967
well, who knows what
would've become of me?
315
00:15:22,969 --> 00:15:25,687
You know? Instead of a
world-class physicist,
316
00:15:25,689 --> 00:15:29,140
I could've wound
up as a-a hobo.
317
00:15:29,142 --> 00:15:31,609
Or a surgeon.
318
00:15:32,478 --> 00:15:34,612
I bet there are
important discoveries
319
00:15:34,614 --> 00:15:35,980
being made every day
320
00:15:35,982 --> 00:15:39,484
because you inspired millions
of kids to pursue science.
321
00:15:39,486 --> 00:15:41,936
In a way, their discoveries
are your discoveries.
322
00:15:41,938 --> 00:15:43,071
Yeah, it's true.
323
00:15:43,073 --> 00:15:44,122
A generation
324
00:15:44,124 --> 00:15:45,473
of young scientists
325
00:15:45,475 --> 00:15:47,575
are standing on your shoulders.
326
00:15:48,644 --> 00:15:50,161
Well, thank-thank you, guys.
327
00:15:50,163 --> 00:15:53,498
That... that-that means a lot.
328
00:15:53,500 --> 00:15:57,218
Well, it's important you know
how much you mean to us.
329
00:15:57,220 --> 00:15:58,670
Uh-oh.
330
00:15:58,672 --> 00:16:00,672
Arthur, are you okay?
331
00:16:00,674 --> 00:16:03,958
I'm having a...
332
00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:06,177
problem with
my pacemaker.
333
00:16:06,179 --> 00:16:07,846
I'll-I'll call
for help.
334
00:16:07,848 --> 00:16:11,015
Any chance we could
plug it into the potato?
335
00:16:15,771 --> 00:16:17,939
No.
336
00:16:23,529 --> 00:16:26,531
(cell phone ringing)
337
00:16:26,533 --> 00:16:28,983
(sighs)
338
00:16:28,985 --> 00:16:31,085
Hello?
339
00:16:31,087 --> 00:16:33,388
What do you mean,
you found my dog?
340
00:16:33,390 --> 00:16:36,441
She's with my friends.
341
00:16:36,443 --> 00:16:38,659
Is she okay?
342
00:16:38,661 --> 00:16:39,878
Oh, thank you.
343
00:16:39,880 --> 00:16:41,963
Uh, just text me your address;
I'm on my way.
344
00:16:41,965 --> 00:16:44,098
Oh, and if she's hungry,
go ahead and feed her.
345
00:16:44,100 --> 00:16:46,267
But do not give her
anything starchy.
346
00:16:46,269 --> 00:16:48,219
She's having risotto for dinner.
347
00:16:50,773 --> 00:16:52,223
Your vitals are stable,
348
00:16:52,225 --> 00:16:54,893
but let's take you in
for some tests just to be safe.
349
00:16:54,895 --> 00:16:56,611
You want one of us to go
with you in the ambulance?
350
00:16:56,613 --> 00:16:58,863
I'll do it!
351
00:16:58,865 --> 00:17:01,566
He's not a relative,
he's not allowed, right?
352
00:17:01,568 --> 00:17:03,401
No, that's not a rule.
He can go.
353
00:17:03,403 --> 00:17:05,620
(whispers):
Oh, yeah!
354
00:17:05,622 --> 00:17:07,739
I can't catch a break today.
355
00:17:09,208 --> 00:17:11,626
We'll pack up your stuff
and meet you at the hospital.
356
00:17:11,628 --> 00:17:13,628
I'm sorry
things turned out this way.
357
00:17:13,630 --> 00:17:16,464
Well, at-at this point,
I'm just...
358
00:17:16,466 --> 00:17:19,717
glad someone's carrying me
down the stairs.
359
00:17:23,255 --> 00:17:25,256
Met my childhood hero,
360
00:17:25,258 --> 00:17:27,008
now I get to ride
in an ambulance.
361
00:17:27,010 --> 00:17:29,260
Boy, if we can get him
to do that calendar,
362
00:17:29,262 --> 00:17:31,429
this'll be the best day ever.
363
00:17:33,849 --> 00:17:36,734
Can't believe
we lost her.
364
00:17:36,736 --> 00:17:37,769
What was I thinking?
365
00:17:37,771 --> 00:17:39,654
I'd be a terrible mom.
366
00:17:39,656 --> 00:17:41,356
Well, maybe with the first one.
367
00:17:41,358 --> 00:17:42,723
But kids are like pancakes.
368
00:17:42,725 --> 00:17:44,993
The first one's
always a throwaway.
369
00:17:49,031 --> 00:17:50,832
How's this look?
It's fine.
370
00:17:50,834 --> 00:17:52,534
Where'd you get
that picture of her?
371
00:17:52,536 --> 00:17:53,668
It's not her.
372
00:17:53,670 --> 00:17:56,871
I just Googled
"foo-foo little dogs."
373
00:17:56,873 --> 00:17:58,172
(Skype ringing)
374
00:17:58,174 --> 00:18:00,608
It's Raj. Stay quiet.
375
00:18:01,677 --> 00:18:02,894
(chuckles):
Hey!
376
00:18:02,896 --> 00:18:04,078
Bad timing.
377
00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:06,431
Bernadette just took Cinnamon
out for a walk.
378
00:18:06,433 --> 00:18:08,299
Hmm. Interesting.
379
00:18:08,301 --> 00:18:11,336
Did they take a walk
down Liars' Lane?
380
00:18:12,171 --> 00:18:13,004
What?
381
00:18:13,006 --> 00:18:14,739
A lane frequented by liars.
382
00:18:14,741 --> 00:18:16,591
Like you, you big liar!
383
00:18:18,394 --> 00:18:19,994
You have her?
384
00:18:19,996 --> 00:18:22,146
Oh, thank God
she's okay.
385
00:18:22,148 --> 00:18:23,948
Well, I trusted you,
and you let me down.
386
00:18:23,950 --> 00:18:26,651
The poor thing's been shaking
for hours.
387
00:18:26,653 --> 00:18:27,902
I'm really sorry.
388
00:18:27,904 --> 00:18:29,704
Hang on, you've
had her for hours?
389
00:18:29,706 --> 00:18:31,306
Yes. I picked her up,
390
00:18:31,308 --> 00:18:34,042
and then we both went for
massages to try and calm down.
391
00:18:34,044 --> 00:18:36,077
And then we got Pinkberry.
392
00:18:36,829 --> 00:18:38,329
So you knew
she was okay,
393
00:18:38,331 --> 00:18:40,732
and you couldn't pick up
the phone to tell us?
394
00:18:40,734 --> 00:18:42,750
Well, I-I thought about...
395
00:18:42,752 --> 00:18:44,252
Don't "well"
me, mister!
396
00:18:44,254 --> 00:18:45,503
We've been
worried sick!
397
00:18:45,505 --> 00:18:47,422
She could have been
dead for all we knew!
398
00:18:47,424 --> 00:18:49,457
You should be
ashamed of yourself!
399
00:18:49,459 --> 00:18:51,125
Sorry. I-I just...
400
00:18:51,127 --> 00:18:52,093
Sorry's not
good enough!
401
00:18:52,095 --> 00:18:53,728
Maybe you need
to take some time
402
00:18:53,730 --> 00:18:55,813
and think about
what you've done!
403
00:18:59,385 --> 00:19:00,852
Nice guilt trip.
404
00:19:00,854 --> 00:19:01,853
(chuckles)
405
00:19:01,855 --> 00:19:04,822
You are gonna be
an amazing mom.
406
00:19:04,824 --> 00:19:06,274
(chuckles)
407
00:19:15,801 --> 00:19:19,253
♪ Soft kitty, warm kitty
408
00:19:19,255 --> 00:19:21,672
♪ Little ball of fur
409
00:19:24,593 --> 00:19:27,862
♪ Happy kitty, sleepy kitty
410
00:19:27,864 --> 00:19:30,865
♪ Purr, purr, purr.
411
00:19:30,867 --> 00:19:32,116
Thank you, Sheldon.
412
00:19:32,118 --> 00:19:33,701
That-that was very nice.
413
00:19:33,703 --> 00:19:34,736
Want me to sing it again?
414
00:19:34,738 --> 00:19:36,621
No.
415
00:19:38,407 --> 00:19:42,543
The fourth, the fourth time
was-was the charm.
416
00:19:42,545 --> 00:19:44,662
There anything
I can get for you?
417
00:19:44,664 --> 00:19:46,330
Some apple juice?
418
00:19:46,332 --> 00:19:47,632
Uh, some Jell-O?
419
00:19:47,634 --> 00:19:49,000
No. No, thank you.
420
00:19:49,002 --> 00:19:50,418
But I-I do...
421
00:19:50,420 --> 00:19:52,553
I do have a favor to-to ask.
422
00:19:52,555 --> 00:19:53,838
(gasps) Name it.
423
00:19:53,840 --> 00:19:55,256
Well, I'm-I'm booked to do
424
00:19:55,258 --> 00:19:57,475
a children's party tomorrow,
425
00:19:57,477 --> 00:20:01,462
and, um, frankly I, you know,
I-I don't feel up to it.
426
00:20:01,464 --> 00:20:03,264
Oh, you're not.
427
00:20:03,266 --> 00:20:05,683
You look awful.
428
00:20:07,236 --> 00:20:09,020
Th-Thank you.
429
00:20:10,773 --> 00:20:12,290
Anyway, uh...
430
00:20:12,292 --> 00:20:16,244
I mean, you know my act
better than... anybody.
431
00:20:16,246 --> 00:20:17,278
I was, I was hoping
432
00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:18,246
that maybe, you know,
433
00:20:18,248 --> 00:20:19,647
maybe you'd fill in for me.
434
00:20:19,649 --> 00:20:21,866
Wha... Are you saying
435
00:20:21,868 --> 00:20:24,719
that you want me to be
Professor Proton?
436
00:20:24,721 --> 00:20:25,920
Yeah.
437
00:20:25,922 --> 00:20:28,172
Oh, my.
438
00:20:28,174 --> 00:20:29,757
What an honor.
439
00:20:29,759 --> 00:20:32,794
Oh, this is like being asked
to ascend Mount Olympus
440
00:20:32,796 --> 00:20:35,029
and dine with the gods.
441
00:20:35,031 --> 00:20:40,535
Or a... Korean family
in Alhambra.
442
00:20:42,003 --> 00:20:44,939
But they'll know I'm not you.
443
00:20:44,941 --> 00:20:47,108
Should I call myself...
444
00:20:47,110 --> 00:20:49,310
Professor Proton, Jr.?
445
00:20:49,312 --> 00:20:51,362
Sounds great.
446
00:20:51,364 --> 00:20:55,116
So, in a way...
447
00:20:55,118 --> 00:20:57,285
it's like I'm your son.
448
00:20:57,287 --> 00:20:59,904
What-Whatever.
449
00:21:03,625 --> 00:21:05,893
Father.
450
00:21:07,746 --> 00:21:09,497
Sure, what the hell?
451
00:21:09,499 --> 00:21:14,499
== sync, corrected by elderman ==