﻿1
00:00:00,962 --> 00:00:01,834
Okay, everyone.

2
00:00:01,957 --> 00:00:05,101
Look in your folders. You will find
information about founder's week.

3
00:00:05,242 --> 00:00:06,600
And before
we start brainstorming,

4
00:00:06,614 --> 00:00:08,706
I just wanna thank Ron
for lending us his cabin.

5
00:00:08,775 --> 00:00:10,042
Lending?

6
00:00:10,112 --> 00:00:11,724
Makes it sound like I had
a choice in the matter.

7
00:00:11,793 --> 00:00:13,069
I never should've agreed
to this

8
00:00:13,193 --> 00:00:14,821
or let you know
that I have a cabin

9
00:00:15,088 --> 00:00:16,756
or gotten to know any of you.

10
00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:18,117
That's the spirit.

11
00:00:18,248 --> 00:00:19,928
Founder's week
is a yearly celebration

12
00:00:19,998 --> 00:00:21,095
of all things Pawnee.

13
00:00:21,164 --> 00:00:23,016
We've got
a pie-eating contest,

14
00:00:23,086 --> 00:00:24,080
a giant petting zoo,

15
00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:25,863
and the granddaddy of them all,

16
00:00:25,932 --> 00:00:27,577
the founder's week parade.

17
00:00:27,647 --> 00:00:28,848
I don't wanna
over-hype it,

18
00:00:28,917 --> 00:00:31,762
but our parade
makes the rose bowl parade

19
00:00:31,832 --> 00:00:33,395
look like
a turds-on-wheels convention.

20
00:00:33,521 --> 00:00:34,600
Let's do an exercise.

21
00:00:34,724 --> 00:00:36,956
April, what makes Pawnee
the best city in the world?

22
00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:39,500
Easy: Most murders
per capita.

23
00:00:39,624 --> 00:00:41,585
The guillotine
was invented here.

24
00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:43,719
City Hall is run
by the walrus mafia.

25
00:00:43,842 --> 00:00:46,503
Donna, help me out.
What makes Pawnee so great?

26
00:00:46,627 --> 00:00:47,818
Cost of living is cheap.

27
00:00:47,942 --> 00:00:49,793
In about three years,
I will have saved enough

28
00:00:49,799 --> 00:00:51,336
to pay off my condo in Seattle.

29
00:00:51,459 --> 00:00:53,097
You have a condo in Seattle?

30
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:55,060
Yes, I like the rain
and the fish markets.

31
00:00:55,201 --> 00:00:56,606
Guys, we need to focus.

32
00:00:56,675 --> 00:00:58,848
I want this to be the best
founder's week ever, okay?

33
00:00:58,972 --> 00:01:02,648
- No more distractions.
- I'm bored.

34
00:01:02,771 --> 00:01:04,620
Let's go have sex in a tree.

35
00:01:04,743 --> 00:01:06,087
He'll be back in eight minutes.

36
00:01:06,210 --> 00:01:07,836
Why did you have
to bring her here?

37
00:01:07,959 --> 00:01:09,541
I don't really have
any power in this relationship.

38
00:01:09,665 --> 00:01:10,940
I'll think of ideas
in the tree.

39
00:01:10,941 --> 00:01:13,035
Anyone's welcome
to join us in the tree!

40
00:01:16,845 --> 00:01:27,524
<font color="#ec14bd">Sync & corrections by honeybunny</font>
<font color="#ec14bd">www.addic7ed.com</font>

41
00:01:34,476 --> 00:01:37,084
Really?

42
00:01:37,154 --> 00:01:39,554
Okay.
Thank you.

43
00:01:39,622 --> 00:01:41,543
Bye.

44
00:01:41,613 --> 00:01:43,704
You okay?

45
00:01:43,774 --> 00:01:44,733
Yeah, I'm fine.

46
00:01:44,803 --> 00:01:45,864
Good morning,

47
00:01:45,934 --> 00:01:48,232
colleagues, co-workers, friends.

48
00:01:48,302 --> 00:01:52,006
Everyone feeling normal...
today?

49
00:01:52,076 --> 00:01:53,138
Here's what happened.

50
00:01:53,208 --> 00:01:54,819
I left my sweat shirt
at Ron's cabin.

51
00:01:54,889 --> 00:01:58,421
When I went back to get it,
I found this in the trash:

52
00:01:58,491 --> 00:02:00,241
Positive pregnancy test.

53
00:02:00,524 --> 00:02:02,890
Side note: I accidentally threw
my sweat shirt away.

54
00:02:02,959 --> 00:02:04,399
That's why I was digging
through the trash.

55
00:02:04,469 --> 00:02:05,806
Found that too.
Pretty cool.

56
00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:08,104
So if my science is correct,

57
00:02:08,175 --> 00:02:11,226
one of the five women
who were at the cabin--

58
00:02:11,296 --> 00:02:15,936
Leslie, Donna, Ann,
Mona-Lisa, or April--

59
00:02:16,060 --> 00:02:17,170
is pregnant!

60
00:02:17,293 --> 00:02:18,586
Can't be April.

61
00:02:18,894 --> 00:02:19,876
She would've told me.

62
00:02:19,999 --> 00:02:22,153
That leaves four suspects.

63
00:02:22,745 --> 00:02:25,001
There's only one man
for this job:

64
00:02:25,125 --> 00:02:28,029
Bert Macklin, FBI.

65
00:02:28,118 --> 00:02:29,936
They said I was retired.

66
00:02:30,006 --> 00:02:31,204
They said I was too dangerous

67
00:02:31,274 --> 00:02:32,645
for the Pawnee
Police Department.

68
00:02:32,715 --> 00:02:34,191
Turns out they were right...

69
00:02:34,315 --> 00:02:35,758
and wrong.

70
00:02:35,882 --> 00:02:39,347
Macklin, you son of a bitch.

71
00:02:40,427 --> 00:02:41,825
Hello, fellow Pawneeans.

72
00:02:41,951 --> 00:02:43,940
As you know,
the founder's week festivities

73
00:02:44,009 --> 00:02:44,969
kick off tomorrow.

74
00:02:45,038 --> 00:02:46,513
Um, one small announcement:

75
00:02:46,582 --> 00:02:48,160
Due to
a tragic misunderstanding,

76
00:02:48,229 --> 00:02:50,696
the prettiest pig
beauty pageant

77
00:02:50,767 --> 00:02:53,398
has been replaced by a pork rib
barbecue competition.

78
00:02:54,282 --> 00:02:55,501
Oh, no.

79
00:02:55,624 --> 00:02:56,946
But on to less grisly news,

80
00:02:57,212 --> 00:02:58,498
thank you for participating

81
00:02:58,621 --> 00:03:00,863
in our special founder's week
public forum

82
00:03:00,986 --> 00:03:03,236
led by councilwoman
Leslie Knope.

83
00:03:05,350 --> 00:03:06,769
Thanks to a lot of hard work

84
00:03:06,892 --> 00:03:08,455
and some very dedicated
civil servants,

85
00:03:08,491 --> 00:03:10,937
this has been a banner year
for our city.

86
00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:13,512
Obesity and diabetes are down.

87
00:03:13,636 --> 00:03:14,744
Test scores are up.

88
00:03:14,867 --> 00:03:16,752
Pawnee raccoon attacks
have decreased.

89
00:03:16,875 --> 00:03:18,652
People can now suddenly
feel safe

90
00:03:18,776 --> 00:03:20,574
in our parks, grocery stores,
and hospitals.

91
00:03:20,697 --> 00:03:22,806
I am very proud
of what we've accomplished.

92
00:03:22,929 --> 00:03:27,243
In fact, this forum
is kind of my victory lap.

93
00:03:27,367 --> 00:03:29,858
I am here today
to ask you one question.

94
00:03:29,981 --> 00:03:33,940
Are you better off now
than you were a year ago?

95
00:03:34,063 --> 00:03:35,636
Who'd like to start?
Uh-oh.

96
00:03:35,875 --> 00:03:38,860
Kathryn Pinewood,
Pawnee Restaurant Association.

97
00:03:38,983 --> 00:03:40,907
This town is not better off.

98
00:03:41,030 --> 00:03:42,926
This past year
has been a disaster,

99
00:03:43,049 --> 00:03:44,778
and this government
is hell-bent

100
00:03:44,901 --> 00:03:48,615
on stripping away our most basic
personal freedoms.

101
00:03:48,738 --> 00:03:50,032
Okay, counterpoint.

102
00:03:50,155 --> 00:03:53,083
Ms. Pinewood, I've never
stripped away anyone's freedoms.

103
00:03:53,207 --> 00:03:54,919
I simply stopped a restaurant

104
00:03:55,042 --> 00:03:58,963
from serving an insane
500-ounce soda to its customers,

105
00:03:59,087 --> 00:04:00,650
which only made
our citizens healthier.

106
00:04:00,778 --> 00:04:02,458
And frankly, I don't see
any of those citizens

107
00:04:02,528 --> 00:04:03,898
standing up
and complaining abo--

108
00:04:06,509 --> 00:04:07,813
Okay.
Now, I see them.

109
00:04:08,066 --> 00:04:10,533
Whoa! Darren!
Slow down!

110
00:04:10,657 --> 00:04:12,681
That sweat suit's
not for sweatin' in, okay?

111
00:04:12,805 --> 00:04:13,752
This is crushed velvet.

112
00:04:13,829 --> 00:04:14,967
If you go at more
than a brisk walk,

113
00:04:15,090 --> 00:04:15,872
it <i>will</i> fall apart.

114
00:04:15,962 --> 00:04:18,358
This looks dope.
Let's pay for it.

115
00:04:18,481 --> 00:04:20,293
Business is booming.

116
00:04:20,416 --> 00:04:22,381
If it keeps up like this, I
would leave the Parks Department

117
00:04:22,504 --> 00:04:25,253
and do Rent-A-Swag full-time,
maybe even expand.

118
00:04:25,376 --> 00:04:26,991
I could add
a baby section over there,

119
00:04:27,115 --> 00:04:27,945
call it "Li'l Swaggers."

120
00:04:28,069 --> 00:04:29,192
I could add
some old people stuff,

121
00:04:29,316 --> 00:04:30,294
call it
"Rent-A-Sag."

122
00:04:30,417 --> 00:04:32,837
Ugh, no.
Old people are gross.

123
00:04:32,961 --> 00:04:34,673
Oh. Nice.

124
00:04:34,796 --> 00:04:37,140
Hey, dingdong!
Can I go home?

125
00:04:37,264 --> 00:04:38,752
My tum-tum
feels gross,

126
00:04:38,876 --> 00:04:41,120
and also, I hate working.

127
00:04:41,442 --> 00:04:43,926
I guess, but find someone
to cover for you, okay?

128
00:04:44,049 --> 00:04:45,019
'Cause we're really busy
right now.

129
00:04:46,279 --> 00:04:48,509
Also, a lawyer guy called you.

130
00:04:48,632 --> 00:04:51,176
He sounded really sexy
on the phone,

131
00:04:51,299 --> 00:04:52,641
and I was very into that.

132
00:04:52,764 --> 00:04:55,402
Like, I was,
like, very into that.

133
00:04:55,526 --> 00:04:56,693
All right,
let's set up some boundaries

134
00:04:56,816 --> 00:04:58,502
on what's cool for you
to say to me, okay?

135
00:04:58,619 --> 00:05:00,497
Okay.
I frenched my cousin one time.

136
00:05:00,620 --> 00:05:01,657
That's gross.

137
00:05:01,780 --> 00:05:02,876
I might still be in love
with him.

138
00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:05,023
- Please leave.
- All right, bye.

139
00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:09,179
Tom Haverford,
my name is Trevor Nelsson.

140
00:05:09,302 --> 00:05:12,011
I represent a client who would
like to make you an offer.

141
00:05:12,135 --> 00:05:13,710
Babyface heard my demo?

142
00:05:13,833 --> 00:05:15,321
I will accept a record deal.

143
00:05:15,444 --> 00:05:17,451
No, you deeply misunderstand.

144
00:05:17,575 --> 00:05:19,801
My client has taken an interest
in Rent-A-Swag.

145
00:05:19,924 --> 00:05:21,714
He'd like to know
if you are looking

146
00:05:21,838 --> 00:05:23,635
to sell a controlling interest
in the store.

147
00:05:23,758 --> 00:05:26,080
Whoa, Diddy wants
to buy Rent-A-Swag?

148
00:05:26,203 --> 00:05:28,358
- Not what I said.
- This is a lot to process.

149
00:05:28,482 --> 00:05:31,401
Will Diddy be coming
to the meeting?

150
00:05:31,524 --> 00:05:33,539
I'm not at liberty to tell you
who my client is.

151
00:05:33,599 --> 00:05:35,272
It would
violate confidentiality.

152
00:05:35,395 --> 00:05:38,141
- I understand.
- It's not Diddy.

153
00:05:38,265 --> 00:05:39,206
Got it.

154
00:05:47,758 --> 00:05:50,693
- Oh.
- Oh, hello...Ann.

155
00:05:50,816 --> 00:05:52,867
Oh, boy.
What do you want, Macklin?

156
00:05:52,990 --> 00:05:54,971
Me?
Just observing.

157
00:05:55,095 --> 00:05:57,151
A little something
they taught us down at Quantico.

158
00:05:57,184 --> 00:05:58,973
Well, I guess
I'll get out of your hair.

159
00:05:59,096 --> 00:06:01,865
Wait, there is
just one more question.

160
00:06:01,988 --> 00:06:04,419
- Congratulations.
- Is that a question?

161
00:06:04,542 --> 00:06:06,719
It's an accusation,
'cause I know your secret.

162
00:06:07,432 --> 00:06:10,168
- You're pregnant.
- What? I'm not pregnant.

163
00:06:10,291 --> 00:06:12,117
You're not?
Damn it. Who is?

164
00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:13,998
'Cause I found this
at Ron Swanson's cabin.

165
00:06:14,122 --> 00:06:15,443
- It's a pregnancy test.
- Oh, my God.

166
00:06:15,566 --> 00:06:16,786
Someone we know is pregnant?

167
00:06:16,909 --> 00:06:18,678
I'm trying to get pregnant.
That's not fair.

168
00:06:18,773 --> 00:06:20,539
I mean, great,
and happy for them,

169
00:06:20,662 --> 00:06:21,896
and congratulations, whatever,

170
00:06:21,977 --> 00:06:23,792
but ooh!
No! Boo!

171
00:06:23,915 --> 00:06:25,194
We have to find out
who this is.

172
00:06:25,318 --> 00:06:28,115
Whoa, I don't think so.
Bert Macklin works alone.

173
00:06:28,239 --> 00:06:29,408
I will buy lunch.

174
00:06:29,531 --> 00:06:30,568
You can have as many burgers
as you want.

175
00:06:30,692 --> 00:06:32,017
Welcome to the FBI.

176
00:06:33,390 --> 00:06:35,679
Ms. Pinewood, Leslie's
public health initiative

177
00:06:35,782 --> 00:06:37,117
has been a huge success.

178
00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:39,843
Pawnee is no longer the fourth
most obese city in America.

179
00:06:39,967 --> 00:06:41,236
We're now ninth.

180
00:06:41,306 --> 00:06:42,780
Together, as a town, we lost

181
00:06:42,850 --> 00:06:45,507
an amount of weight equal
to 800 pregnant manatees.

182
00:06:45,630 --> 00:06:47,989
A gym opened,
and it stayed in business.

183
00:06:48,112 --> 00:06:49,983
And people checking
into the E.R.

184
00:06:50,053 --> 00:06:53,077
after ingesting a whole
candy wrapper is down 40%.

185
00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:54,717
But where will it end?

186
00:06:54,840 --> 00:06:56,778
Now, you wanna rob
our children of fun

187
00:06:56,902 --> 00:06:59,541
by attacking the Sweetums
school lunch program,

188
00:06:59,664 --> 00:07:01,799
literally taking candy
from babies.

189
00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:04,092
Those school lunches
are incredibly unhealthy.

190
00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:06,278
You somehow convinced
the school board

191
00:07:06,348 --> 00:07:07,855
that napkins are a vegetable.

192
00:07:07,925 --> 00:07:08,994
They're made from plants.

193
00:07:09,116 --> 00:07:12,109
Stop restricting our freedoms.

194
00:07:12,179 --> 00:07:15,334
Yeah!

195
00:07:17,346 --> 00:07:19,659
My name is Dewey from Sanitation.

196
00:07:19,906 --> 00:07:21,516
Ever since you stripped us of our freedoms

197
00:07:21,586 --> 00:07:23,025
by making us hire women,

198
00:07:23,095 --> 00:07:24,912
we've had to turn
one of our bathrooms

199
00:07:24,982 --> 00:07:26,559
into a woman's bathroom.

200
00:07:26,628 --> 00:07:27,966
We only have one bathroom now.

201
00:07:28,036 --> 00:07:29,201
I'm so sorry, Dewey.

202
00:07:29,270 --> 00:07:30,882
That sounds
like a horrible price to pay

203
00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:33,352
for something as trivial
as gender equality.

204
00:07:33,421 --> 00:07:34,724
So you agree.

205
00:07:34,794 --> 00:07:37,261
Bjorn Lerpiss
of the Pawnee Lerpiss family.

206
00:07:37,331 --> 00:07:38,936
There was supposed to be
a Paunch Burger

207
00:07:38,997 --> 00:07:40,190
in this lot next to my house.

208
00:07:40,287 --> 00:07:41,341
And then, you stripped
my freedom

209
00:07:41,464 --> 00:07:42,533
by putting a park there.

210
00:07:42,656 --> 00:07:43,621
Now, if I wanna start
my day off

211
00:07:43,744 --> 00:07:45,553
with a triple-decker pancake
breakfast pizza,

212
00:07:45,640 --> 00:07:47,173
I gotta go to the one
that's 10 minutes away,

213
00:07:47,296 --> 00:07:49,052
and that makes me 20 minutes
late to work every day.

214
00:07:49,361 --> 00:07:50,173
I work at home.

215
00:07:50,296 --> 00:07:52,110
Have you ever considered
not eating that for breakfast?

216
00:07:52,233 --> 00:07:53,961
I'll never consider that.

217
00:07:54,084 --> 00:07:56,457
This feels strangely personal.

218
00:07:56,581 --> 00:07:57,758
Maybe it's because they're all
standing up

219
00:07:57,881 --> 00:08:00,367
saying how much they hate me
as a person.

220
00:08:01,643 --> 00:08:04,181
How many people
am I talking to, Donna?

221
00:08:04,304 --> 00:08:06,239
One or 1 1/9?

222
00:08:06,363 --> 00:08:08,161
Are you asking me
if I'm pregnant?

223
00:08:08,284 --> 00:08:10,541
Oh.
Interesting.

224
00:08:10,664 --> 00:08:12,125
I don't remember
saying anything

225
00:08:12,249 --> 00:08:14,200
about anyone being pregnant.

226
00:08:14,324 --> 00:08:16,626
Are you sure it's not you?

227
00:08:16,749 --> 00:08:18,631
I'm a grown woman with
a good head on her shoulders.

228
00:08:18,754 --> 00:08:20,075
Don't worry about me.

229
00:08:20,454 --> 00:08:24,205
Whew.
This case just got interesting.

230
00:08:24,329 --> 00:08:25,046
Well, not just.

231
00:08:25,170 --> 00:08:26,939
It was pretty interesting
to begin with.

232
00:08:27,063 --> 00:08:30,705
This case
just remained interesting.

233
00:08:31,547 --> 00:08:33,314
Listen, my wife and I
do not feel

234
00:08:33,437 --> 00:08:35,037
that we're better off
than a year ago

235
00:08:35,160 --> 00:08:36,550
because a year ago, this town

236
00:08:36,674 --> 00:08:37,995
was not a horrifying sex den

237
00:08:38,118 --> 00:08:39,502
where people could put
their body parts

238
00:08:39,626 --> 00:08:40,800
anywhere they want
with impunity.

239
00:08:40,923 --> 00:08:42,076
And then, you were elected.

240
00:08:42,168 --> 00:08:44,653
And now, this town
a horrifying sex den

241
00:08:44,777 --> 00:08:46,257
where people can put
their body parts

242
00:08:46,263 --> 00:08:48,176
anywhere they want to
with impunity.

243
00:08:48,299 --> 00:08:48,821
Yeah.

244
00:08:48,944 --> 00:08:50,601
If you are referring
to my fight

245
00:08:50,725 --> 00:08:53,216
to teach
comprehensive sex education,

246
00:08:53,339 --> 00:08:54,985
you need to at least
acknowledge the fact

247
00:08:55,066 --> 00:08:57,116
that STDs are
down 14% from last year.

248
00:08:57,239 --> 00:09:00,636
And deviant behavior in Pawnee
is up a billion percent!

249
00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:01,583
No, it's--
no, it's--

250
00:09:01,587 --> 00:09:02,657
This town is going to hell

251
00:09:02,709 --> 00:09:04,855
in a Gucci knock-off
handbag, girl.

252
00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:06,873
See? See?

253
00:09:06,996 --> 00:09:08,838
They agree.
Come on.

254
00:09:08,961 --> 00:09:11,306
I am definitely better off
than I was a year ago,

255
00:09:11,429 --> 00:09:12,965
and it's all thanks
to Leslie Knope.

256
00:09:13,088 --> 00:09:15,566
This woman single-handedly
saved my business.

257
00:09:15,690 --> 00:09:17,664
Thank you, Dennis.
There you go, perfect example.

258
00:09:17,744 --> 00:09:19,050
No need for further questions
on that one.

259
00:09:19,173 --> 00:09:21,876
Oh, I'm sorry.
What is your business, sir?

260
00:09:21,999 --> 00:09:23,957
Oh, I run
a pornographic DVD emporium.

261
00:09:24,080 --> 00:09:27,598
Well, it used to be a quaint,
little movie rental place

262
00:09:27,721 --> 00:09:29,112
with a lot of community value.

263
00:09:29,246 --> 00:09:30,446
- Oh, it's much better now.
- Yeah!

264
00:09:33,019 --> 00:09:35,557
- Leslie is the best.
- No, no, Brandi.

265
00:09:35,627 --> 00:09:36,655
- Gah, gah, gah, gah--
- Hello, everyone.

266
00:09:36,725 --> 00:09:39,606
- I'm Brandi Maxxxx...
- Hi, Brandi.

267
00:09:39,675 --> 00:09:43,378
Star of such films as
the incredible Burt Wonderbone,

268
00:09:43,448 --> 00:09:46,502
<i>A Good Guy to Lay Hard,</i>
and <i>Argo.</i>

269
00:09:46,625 --> 00:09:48,282
I had a small part in <i>Argo</i>

270
00:09:48,406 --> 00:09:50,666
as well as the porn version
<i>Our Goo.</i>

271
00:09:50,789 --> 00:09:52,334
I've seen the first 90 seconds.

272
00:09:52,458 --> 00:09:53,231
It's thrilling.

273
00:09:53,354 --> 00:09:54,710
If it weren't for Leslie Knope,

274
00:09:54,833 --> 00:09:57,765
there would be far, far less
pornography in this town.

275
00:09:57,889 --> 00:10:00,761
No, what happened was
there was a misunderstanding,

276
00:10:00,885 --> 00:10:03,173
and I accidentally got
the government involved

277
00:10:03,297 --> 00:10:05,231
in an unseemly business,
but I cleared that up,

278
00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:06,228
and everything's fine.

279
00:10:06,351 --> 00:10:09,425
It's not like I'm some kind of
sex-crazed maniac or something.

280
00:10:09,548 --> 00:10:10,939
Leslie, are you pregnant?

281
00:10:11,062 --> 00:10:12,453
Did you or did you not leave

282
00:10:12,576 --> 00:10:14,935
this positive pregnancy test
in a dumpster in the woods?

283
00:10:16,308 --> 00:10:17,893
Hey, everybody.

284
00:10:19,883 --> 00:10:21,719
- No.
- Really?

285
00:10:21,843 --> 00:10:23,570
Okay.
Well, I'll get out of your hair.

286
00:10:23,693 --> 00:10:25,053
Sorry to interrupt.

287
00:10:25,176 --> 00:10:27,113
Was that Brandi Maxxxx?

288
00:10:28,129 --> 00:10:32,168
Investors, I have some very
exciting news about Rent-A-Swag.

289
00:10:32,291 --> 00:10:34,537
Someone--
I'm not saying Diddy,

290
00:10:34,660 --> 00:10:36,459
but I'm not
<i>not</i> saying Diddy--

291
00:10:36,583 --> 00:10:38,365
has offered
to buy out Rent-A-Swag

292
00:10:38,489 --> 00:10:40,146
for a buttload of money.

293
00:10:40,270 --> 00:10:41,793
How big a buttload, son?

294
00:10:41,917 --> 00:10:45,362
We would all basically
double our investments.

295
00:10:45,485 --> 00:10:47,639
Are you kidding me?
Sell, baby.

296
00:10:47,763 --> 00:10:49,135
Imagine the kind
of treat-yourself day

297
00:10:49,259 --> 00:10:50,341
we could have with the profits.

298
00:10:50,465 --> 00:10:54,113
I'm talking pedicures
on pedicures on pedicures.

299
00:10:54,236 --> 00:10:55,207
That is appealing.

300
00:10:55,330 --> 00:10:57,398
If someone is interested
in buying you out,

301
00:10:57,521 --> 00:10:58,822
it means you're doing
something right.

302
00:10:58,945 --> 00:11:00,499
I say you continue to grow,

303
00:11:00,622 --> 00:11:02,717
accumulate power,
find this investor,

304
00:11:02,841 --> 00:11:04,858
and buy his business
to teach him a lesson.

305
00:11:04,981 --> 00:11:07,359
- April, what do you think?
- I thought about this a lot.

306
00:11:07,482 --> 00:11:10,093
I actually think that you should
get a "Hello Kitty" tattoo.

307
00:11:10,216 --> 00:11:11,841
- No, with the store.
- Oh.

308
00:11:11,965 --> 00:11:13,749
Uh, burn it
for the insurance money.

309
00:11:14,001 --> 00:11:15,739
Tom, listen to me, if there's
one thing I've learned--

310
00:11:15,863 --> 00:11:17,881
- God, nobody cares, Gary.
- Enough.

311
00:11:18,604 --> 00:11:20,462
- Thank you.
- I miss you guys.

312
00:11:21,406 --> 00:11:23,900
What a wonderful event.
Everyone is having fun.

313
00:11:24,022 --> 00:11:25,290
This is great.

314
00:11:25,361 --> 00:11:26,971
Chris, could you just please...

315
00:11:27,041 --> 00:11:28,859
I'm sorry, I was just trying
to cheer you up.

316
00:11:28,928 --> 00:11:30,162
- Just hang in there.
- Thanks.

317
00:11:30,194 --> 00:11:31,721
All right,
if you'll excuse me, I found out

318
00:11:31,844 --> 00:11:33,799
this morning that I am playing

319
00:11:33,868 --> 00:11:36,063
a special role in this parade.

320
00:11:36,133 --> 00:11:37,138
No spoilers.

321
00:11:38,723 --> 00:11:40,279
Honey, I hate to state
the obvious,

322
00:11:40,403 --> 00:11:42,299
but you chose a life
in politics.

323
00:11:42,422 --> 00:11:44,090
I mean, the more
you actually accomplish,

324
00:11:44,159 --> 00:11:45,633
the more heat
you're gonna draw.

325
00:11:45,702 --> 00:11:48,343
- Yeah, I know.
- Let's go watch the parade.

326
00:11:48,413 --> 00:11:49,391
You know you can't resist
a parade.

327
00:11:49,514 --> 00:11:50,583
That's true.

328
00:11:50,706 --> 00:11:52,563
Parades and your butt:

329
00:11:52,633 --> 00:11:53,763
- My two vices.
- There you go.

330
00:11:53,832 --> 00:11:55,616
Whoa, what are you doing?

331
00:11:55,685 --> 00:11:57,783
My assistant has something
she'd like to show you.

332
00:11:57,908 --> 00:11:59,395
Partner.

333
00:11:59,788 --> 00:12:02,535
Oh, my assistant has something
she'd like to show you, partner.

334
00:12:02,900 --> 00:12:04,470
It's a positive
pregnancy test, Tom.

335
00:12:04,593 --> 00:12:06,068
I found it
outside of Ron's cabin

336
00:12:06,191 --> 00:12:07,288
after our brainstorming session.

337
00:12:07,412 --> 00:12:10,327
Is there any possibility
Mona-Lisa could be pregnant?

338
00:12:10,450 --> 00:12:13,180
We always use protection...

339
00:12:13,282 --> 00:12:14,792
but I'm pretty positive
she pokes holes in them.

340
00:12:14,861 --> 00:12:16,335
What brand pregnancy test
is it?

341
00:12:16,404 --> 00:12:18,256
It's called
"Womb There It Is."

342
00:12:18,326 --> 00:12:19,909
That's her brand.

343
00:12:20,245 --> 00:12:22,054
I'm gonna be a dad?

344
00:12:22,307 --> 00:12:25,153
I'm gonna have a baby
with Jean-Ralphio's sister?

345
00:12:25,276 --> 00:12:26,982
Oh, God.
What have I done?

346
00:12:27,105 --> 00:12:28,875
Like, to humanity?

347
00:12:35,212 --> 00:12:36,282
This is the perfect thing

348
00:12:36,344 --> 00:12:37,716
to take my mind
off of yesterday.

349
00:12:37,786 --> 00:12:40,598
I am going to pretend
that this is my victory parade

350
00:12:40,667 --> 00:12:43,444
and the town is celebrating
my hard work and dedication.

351
00:12:43,514 --> 00:12:45,126
- There you go.
- Leslie, Leslie.

352
00:12:45,195 --> 00:12:46,928
I'm so sorry.
I need to talk to you.

353
00:12:47,052 --> 00:12:49,675
What are--
what?

354
00:12:49,947 --> 00:12:51,283
I'm the Nipple King.

355
00:12:51,353 --> 00:12:52,897
Kernston's Rubber
Nipple Company

356
00:12:52,966 --> 00:12:54,981
elects a nipple king
and a nipple queen every year

357
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:56,189
to ride on the float.

358
00:12:56,259 --> 00:12:58,246
- Congratulations, Chris.
- Thank you.

359
00:12:58,316 --> 00:13:00,340
- It's such an amazing honor.
- It's wonderful.

360
00:13:00,408 --> 00:13:01,601
But I do need to talk to you

361
00:13:01,644 --> 00:13:03,125
about a float
that is in this parade,

362
00:13:03,154 --> 00:13:04,148
because I'm not sure
that you're going to be--

363
00:13:04,218 --> 00:13:06,720
- No fun for you!
- Uh-oh.

364
00:13:06,790 --> 00:13:08,470
No fun for you!

365
00:13:08,539 --> 00:13:10,665
- Is that me?
- Maybe it's not you.

366
00:13:10,735 --> 00:13:12,913
- Maybe it's Kate Upton.
- Oh, thank you.

367
00:13:13,036 --> 00:13:15,521
No, it's me, and damn them.
No fun for you!

368
00:13:15,645 --> 00:13:17,218
Hey!
Hey, hey, hey, hey!

369
00:13:17,341 --> 00:13:18,530
Hey, stop, please!

370
00:13:18,653 --> 00:13:20,199
Stop!
Excuse me, Pawnee.

371
00:13:20,322 --> 00:13:22,834
I'm sorry, I don't mean to stop
your parade or anything,

372
00:13:22,957 --> 00:13:24,967
but I just have to say
something here, okay?

373
00:13:25,091 --> 00:13:26,649
I don't think
this is very fair!

374
00:13:26,773 --> 00:13:28,459
Babe--babe, stop wagging
your finger.

375
00:13:28,582 --> 00:13:30,371
Certain people
are lashing out at me

376
00:13:30,495 --> 00:13:32,278
because of things
that I did this year.

377
00:13:32,402 --> 00:13:34,718
But I am not trying to stop you
from having fun.

378
00:13:34,842 --> 00:13:36,524
I am an extremely fun person.

379
00:13:36,647 --> 00:13:39,075
This float represents a group

380
00:13:39,198 --> 00:13:42,999
of over 300 business owners,
individuals,

381
00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:46,154
and community leaders
who are protesting

382
00:13:46,277 --> 00:13:48,237
unfair government regulation.

383
00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:52,363
We are the committee
to recall Leslie Knope.

384
00:13:52,486 --> 00:13:55,035
Let's kick her out of office.

385
00:13:55,158 --> 00:13:57,295
Recall Knope!

386
00:13:57,418 --> 00:13:59,589
Recall Knope!

387
00:13:59,712 --> 00:14:01,403
Recall Knope!

388
00:14:01,527 --> 00:14:04,763
- Recall Knope!
- Legalize weed!

389
00:14:04,832 --> 00:14:07,645
Recall Knope!
Recall Knope!

390
00:14:08,311 --> 00:14:09,888
So, I need to ask you something

391
00:14:10,011 --> 00:14:12,441
and I kinda wish Jean-Ralphio wasn't here.

392
00:14:12,564 --> 00:14:15,171
Please tell me
that you're dumping my sister,

393
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:18,205
because I will laugh--
I will laugh so much.

394
00:14:18,328 --> 00:14:20,490
Actually, it may be
the opposite.

395
00:14:20,614 --> 00:14:23,383
- Is this yours?
- No, no.

396
00:14:25,704 --> 00:14:29,373
Yeah.
It's mine.

397
00:14:29,443 --> 00:14:31,977
- I'm pregnant.
- Lemony snicket.

398
00:14:32,100 --> 00:14:34,089
Oh, my God, are you serious?

399
00:14:34,159 --> 00:14:35,377
I'm gonna be an uncle?
Is that a real thing?

400
00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:36,526
Is that gonna happen?

401
00:14:36,650 --> 00:14:38,531
No, no, that's too much--
too much responsibility for me.

402
00:14:38,655 --> 00:14:40,509
I gotta--I gotta find
another way out of this.

403
00:14:40,632 --> 00:14:42,236
Well, I wish you told me.

404
00:14:42,359 --> 00:14:44,186
I mean, obviously, we need
to talk about our future.

405
00:14:44,310 --> 00:14:45,445
Maybe I could sell
the business,

406
00:14:45,568 --> 00:14:46,482
and we could use the profits

407
00:14:46,606 --> 00:14:48,109
to put a down payment
on a house or something, or--

408
00:14:48,232 --> 00:14:50,058
- <i>Psych!</i>
<i>- </i> What?

409
00:14:51,531 --> 00:14:55,415
Ah, ha, ha.
Look at your stupid face.

410
00:14:55,538 --> 00:14:58,037
- You had a dumdum face.
- That was hilarious.

411
00:14:58,160 --> 00:15:01,094
Oh, that was... ♪ hilarious ♪

412
00:15:01,218 --> 00:15:04,575
♪ That's hilarious ♪

413
00:15:04,698 --> 00:15:06,701
So you're not pregnant?
This isn't yours?

414
00:15:06,824 --> 00:15:07,823
[Bleep], no.

415
00:15:07,946 --> 00:15:11,243
Do you know how many different
pills I take,

416
00:15:11,367 --> 00:15:13,453
birth control or otherwise?

417
00:15:13,576 --> 00:15:16,467
There is no way that I could
be pregnant with a human baby.

418
00:15:16,590 --> 00:15:18,408
Thank God.
Yes!

419
00:15:18,531 --> 00:15:20,398
Tommy has his life back!
Let's go!

420
00:15:20,522 --> 00:15:21,436
What the hell
is wrong with you, man?

421
00:15:21,559 --> 00:15:22,592
That's my sister.

422
00:15:23,189 --> 00:15:24,715
Nah!
I'm just kidding, man.

423
00:15:24,839 --> 00:15:27,786
She's the worst.
You dodged a bullet, baby.

424
00:15:27,909 --> 00:15:29,020
- Congratulations.
- Thanks.

425
00:15:29,044 --> 00:15:30,294
Bad, bad, bad, bad.

426
00:15:30,418 --> 00:15:32,832
Well, Macklin,
it's not Mona-Lisa.

427
00:15:32,918 --> 00:15:34,595
It's not me, it's not Donna,
it's not Leslie.

428
00:15:34,719 --> 00:15:36,529
There was only one other woman
at that cabin.

429
00:15:36,652 --> 00:15:38,254
April?
No, she would've told me.

430
00:15:38,378 --> 00:15:39,878
Besides, the math
doesn't add up

431
00:15:40,001 --> 00:15:42,191
because we only have sex
every single day.

432
00:15:42,315 --> 00:15:45,264
And since she's the only one
that we haven't talked to,

433
00:15:45,388 --> 00:15:47,536
it has to be hers.

434
00:15:47,659 --> 00:15:49,050
Oh, my God.

435
00:15:53,486 --> 00:15:55,039
I don't like seeing you
like this.

436
00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:56,640
I've never felt
this way before.

437
00:15:56,763 --> 00:15:57,834
Maybe I should just quit.

438
00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:59,572
Maybe we should both quit,

439
00:15:59,696 --> 00:16:01,054
and we should move
to the Bahamas,

440
00:16:01,140 --> 00:16:04,463
live on a beach,
catch fish with homemade spears.

441
00:16:04,587 --> 00:16:06,777
Yeah, you'd last
about 30 seconds with that work.

442
00:16:06,900 --> 00:16:08,146
When we went to Hawaii,

443
00:16:08,270 --> 00:16:09,997
you woke me up at 3:00 A.M.
to watch <i>Meet the Press.</i>

444
00:16:10,120 --> 00:16:11,791
Well, it was Elizabeth Warren.

445
00:16:11,914 --> 00:16:14,001
Like, I'm not going
to watch that live?

446
00:16:14,124 --> 00:16:15,646
Look, you can hate
your job sometimes.

447
00:16:15,708 --> 00:16:17,394
It's allowed.
But let me ask you this:

448
00:16:17,517 --> 00:16:19,081
Do you think this town
is better off

449
00:16:19,204 --> 00:16:20,945
- than it was a year ago?
- Yes.

450
00:16:21,068 --> 00:16:22,878
Do you stand behind
everything you've done?

451
00:16:22,999 --> 00:16:24,959
- Yes.
- Then screw 'em.

452
00:16:25,849 --> 00:16:28,063
But even if I wanted
to fight this recall,

453
00:16:28,186 --> 00:16:29,353
how would I do it?

454
00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:32,313
Thank you all for coming.

455
00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:34,207
As most of you probably know,

456
00:16:34,277 --> 00:16:36,747
there is a large committee
that has announced plans

457
00:16:36,817 --> 00:16:38,255
to recall me from office.

458
00:16:38,325 --> 00:16:41,275
My response to them is this:

459
00:16:41,344 --> 00:16:42,925
Bring it on.

460
00:16:43,048 --> 00:16:45,630
Step up.
<i>Step Up 2: The Streets.</i>

461
00:16:45,701 --> 00:16:47,452
I'm sorry,
my adrenaline is pumping,

462
00:16:47,575 --> 00:16:49,471
so all I can think of
is dance movie titles.

463
00:16:49,595 --> 00:16:51,350
<i>Stomp the Yard.</i>
There's one.

464
00:16:51,473 --> 00:16:53,352
Look, I work very hard
for this town,

465
00:16:53,475 --> 00:16:54,501
as hard as I can,

466
00:16:54,624 --> 00:16:56,422
and all that matters to me
is whether or not

467
00:16:56,545 --> 00:16:58,910
everyone here thinks
that they are better off now

468
00:16:59,033 --> 00:17:00,890
than they were a year ago.

469
00:17:01,013 --> 00:17:01,967
I think you are.

470
00:17:02,090 --> 00:17:04,294
If you disagree with me,
then go ahead and recall me.

471
00:17:04,418 --> 00:17:06,548
Go crazy.
<i>You Got Served.</i>

472
00:17:06,880 --> 00:17:08,863
<i>Silver Linings Playbook,</i>
kind of.

473
00:17:09,102 --> 00:17:10,624
The committee says
they plan to push

474
00:17:10,725 --> 00:17:12,032
for a recall vote
within two months.

475
00:17:12,156 --> 00:17:13,522
- Do you have a comment on that?
- Nope.

476
00:17:13,645 --> 00:17:16,741
Again, all I really care about
is are you better off?

477
00:17:16,865 --> 00:17:18,550
I think I'm better off.

478
00:17:18,673 --> 00:17:20,009
I haven't had a date
in a while,

479
00:17:20,132 --> 00:17:21,803
but I'm learning a lot
about me.

480
00:17:21,926 --> 00:17:23,489
Well, I wasn't
asking you specifically,

481
00:17:23,506 --> 00:17:24,672
but I'm happy
to hear that, Shauna.

482
00:17:24,795 --> 00:17:27,860
So, in conclusion,
recall, shmecall.

483
00:17:27,983 --> 00:17:31,453
No, I can't end
my big press conference

484
00:17:31,577 --> 00:17:32,729
by saying
"Recall, shmecall."

485
00:17:32,775 --> 00:17:34,750
That's ridiculous.
Ben, can you help me out here?

486
00:17:34,769 --> 00:17:36,991
That concludes councilwoman
Knope's press conference.

487
00:17:37,100 --> 00:17:38,898
And if you have
any further questions...

488
00:17:39,022 --> 00:17:41,561
hold on to them,

489
00:17:41,685 --> 00:17:43,299
because she has
a lot of work to do.

490
00:17:43,422 --> 00:17:44,645
Thanks, honey.
<i>Honey.</i>

491
00:17:44,768 --> 00:17:47,337
That's another dance movie
with Jessica alba.

492
00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:49,538
Alright, people.

493
00:17:49,725 --> 00:17:51,491
The Pawnee river's
not gonna clean itself.

494
00:17:51,615 --> 00:17:53,844
Volunteer weekend
task force, mobilize.

495
00:17:53,914 --> 00:17:55,764
Oh, Leslie,
this goes without saying,

496
00:17:55,834 --> 00:17:58,200
but if you need
any speeches or testimonials

497
00:17:58,269 --> 00:18:00,601
or just general enthusiasm
for your recall fight,

498
00:18:00,671 --> 00:18:01,802
I'm your man.

499
00:18:01,871 --> 00:18:03,105
- Thank you, Chris.
- You're welcome.

500
00:18:03,175 --> 00:18:04,854
I'll see you at the river.
Oh, oh, oh!

501
00:18:04,924 --> 00:18:07,315
Last one to pick up
100 rusty cans

502
00:18:07,602 --> 00:18:09,727
has still accomplished
a great deal.

503
00:18:09,797 --> 00:18:11,155
Hey, maybe after,
you wanna come

504
00:18:11,203 --> 00:18:12,437
meet me and Chris for a drink?

505
00:18:12,473 --> 00:18:14,529
Sure. Hey, how's it going
with you guys?

506
00:18:14,598 --> 00:18:17,789
We're great, actually,
and we're having a good time.

507
00:18:17,857 --> 00:18:19,366
- Sex is ridiculous.
- Mm-hmm.

508
00:18:19,436 --> 00:18:21,596
Hopefully, that ridiculous sex
will lead to a baby.

509
00:18:21,666 --> 00:18:22,667
I'm so happy for you.

510
00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:23,968
Just remember
to use protection.

511
00:18:24,039 --> 00:18:25,992
Wait, no, don't.
That would defeat the purpose.

512
00:18:26,062 --> 00:18:27,982
Okay, no.
Do your thing.

513
00:18:30,241 --> 00:18:32,132
Yeah!

514
00:18:32,201 --> 00:18:35,475
- My wife is pregnant!
- Okay, put me down.

515
00:18:35,598 --> 00:18:36,661
Hey, you can't keep it from me.

516
00:18:36,730 --> 00:18:37,690
I found
the pregnancy test, honey.

517
00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:38,993
Honey, I'm not pregnant, okay?

518
00:18:38,994 --> 00:18:40,599
And if I were,
you shouldn't lift me up.

519
00:18:40,696 --> 00:18:42,326
Wait, are you sure you're not?

520
00:18:42,449 --> 00:18:44,148
Yeah.
We've talked about this.

521
00:18:44,271 --> 00:18:45,017
Remember?

522
00:18:45,141 --> 00:18:46,304
I wanna wait until we're 50

523
00:18:46,427 --> 00:18:49,010
and then adopt a set of creepy
adult twins from Romania.

524
00:18:49,133 --> 00:18:50,257
Oh, yeah.
Of course.

525
00:18:50,380 --> 00:18:52,313
Actually, there is something
I need to tell you.

526
00:18:52,337 --> 00:18:54,008
You're pregnant.

527
00:18:54,131 --> 00:18:55,396
- No.
- No!

528
00:18:55,519 --> 00:18:57,178
We just ruled that out.

529
00:18:57,301 --> 00:18:59,201
- Ah, dang it.
- Okay, a while ago,

530
00:18:59,324 --> 00:19:00,897
I applied to veterinary school
in Bloomington,

531
00:19:01,021 --> 00:19:04,662
and I just found out that...
I got in.

532
00:19:04,785 --> 00:19:07,066
You did?
That's amazing!

533
00:19:07,190 --> 00:19:08,734
Wait, why did you wait
to tell me?

534
00:19:08,858 --> 00:19:11,314
Because I don't even know
if I wanna go, okay?

535
00:19:11,437 --> 00:19:13,733
I mean, yes, it's been my dream
to work with animals

536
00:19:13,856 --> 00:19:15,949
since I was a kid
and everything.

537
00:19:16,186 --> 00:19:17,154
But it would mean
I would be spending

538
00:19:17,277 --> 00:19:19,033
a lot of time
apart from you, and...

539
00:19:19,157 --> 00:19:20,638
Oh, we could get through that.

540
00:19:20,772 --> 00:19:22,377
I mean, look.
It would suck for a while,

541
00:19:22,418 --> 00:19:24,269
and I would miss you
while you're gone.

542
00:19:25,277 --> 00:19:27,339
But as I've known about you

543
00:19:27,462 --> 00:19:29,470
for the past 20 seconds,

544
00:19:29,594 --> 00:19:31,556
this is your dream.

545
00:19:32,597 --> 00:19:34,233
I'm really glad I married you.

546
00:19:34,356 --> 00:19:36,041
Yeah, we made a good call
on that one.

547
00:19:37,317 --> 00:19:38,846
So I just wanted
to let you know

548
00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:40,881
I will not
be selling Rent-A-Swag.

549
00:19:41,004 --> 00:19:42,493
And you can go tell your client

550
00:19:42,616 --> 00:19:45,333
he now has 100 problems?

551
00:19:45,456 --> 00:19:47,110
- Is it Jay-Z?
- No.

552
00:19:47,234 --> 00:19:48,344
But since you're not taking
the deal,

553
00:19:48,468 --> 00:19:49,606
I should inform you
that my client

554
00:19:49,729 --> 00:19:52,232
will be moving on to plan B:
Opening his own store

555
00:19:52,355 --> 00:19:53,670
directly across the street
from yours.

556
00:19:53,793 --> 00:19:54,693
Across the street?

557
00:19:54,816 --> 00:19:55,843
What kind of store
is it gonna be?

558
00:19:55,966 --> 00:19:57,365
He's calling it
"Tommy's Closet."

559
00:19:57,425 --> 00:19:59,643
It's a high-end
secondhand clothing store

560
00:19:59,766 --> 00:20:00,764
where parents can rent clothes

561
00:20:00,888 --> 00:20:02,362
for their teens,
tweens, and pres,

562
00:20:02,486 --> 00:20:05,617
as well as babies, toddlers,
grown-ups, and olds.

563
00:20:05,741 --> 00:20:07,385
But that's my idea and my name.

564
00:20:07,508 --> 00:20:09,877
So I guess only Domino's
is allowed to sell pizza now?

565
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:11,924
It's called capitalism,
Mr. Haverford,

566
00:20:12,048 --> 00:20:13,949
and you are about to get
a free lesson.

567
00:20:14,072 --> 00:20:17,391
Only this free lesson
is going to cost you.

568
00:20:17,839 --> 00:20:19,907
So it's not free?

569
00:20:21,239 --> 00:20:23,103
You're right.
That was confusing.

570
00:20:23,790 --> 00:20:25,839
This lesson will cost you.
Good day.

571
00:20:25,963 --> 00:20:28,531
This sucks,
but I have to admit:

572
00:20:28,839 --> 00:20:30,281
It's a pretty baller move.

573
00:20:30,883 --> 00:20:32,717
You sure this isn't Diddy?

574
00:20:35,381 --> 00:20:37,517
- It is Diddy.
- I knew it!

575
00:20:37,641 --> 00:20:38,611
It's not Diddy.

576
00:20:40,721 --> 00:20:43,022
Are you sure
everything will be all right

577
00:20:43,145 --> 00:20:44,298
if April goes to vet school?

578
00:20:44,413 --> 00:20:46,743
There are no sure things
in life, son,

579
00:20:46,866 --> 00:20:49,234
but you two seem
pretty solid to me.

580
00:20:49,358 --> 00:20:52,192
- Change is good, I guess.
- Not to me.

581
00:20:52,316 --> 00:20:54,388
Leslie's going around
asking everybody

582
00:20:54,512 --> 00:20:56,548
if they're better off
than they were a year ago.

583
00:20:56,671 --> 00:20:59,122
All I care about
is that I'm the same.

584
00:20:59,245 --> 00:21:02,156
If I'm the same as I was
a year ago, I'm happy.

585
00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:03,376
Wait, I forgot.

586
00:21:03,684 --> 00:21:05,641
- Who the hell is pregnant?
- What?

587
00:21:05,764 --> 00:21:07,410
I found a pregnancy test
at your cabin,

588
00:21:07,418 --> 00:21:08,866
and I checked with all the girls
over there.

589
00:21:08,989 --> 00:21:11,312
It wasn't any of them.

590
00:21:11,663 --> 00:21:13,892
Hello, darling.
What a surprise.

591
00:21:14,015 --> 00:21:16,070
Hey.
Can we talk?

592
00:21:16,194 --> 00:21:18,097
Maybe in private?

593
00:21:21,116 --> 00:21:27,881
<font color="#ec14bd">Sync & corrections by honeybunny</font>
<font color="#ec14bd">www.addic7ed.com</font>

