1
00:00:09,051 --> 00:00:11,053
(THEME SONG PLAYING)
2
00:01:06,099 --> 00:01:16,651
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
3
00:01:19,998 --> 00:01:21,666
(FEEDBACK SQUEALS)
4
00:01:23,167 --> 00:01:26,880
BELL: "In a world filled with
hate, we must still dare to hope.
5
00:01:26,963 --> 00:01:30,800
"In a world filled with despair,
we must still dare to dream."
6
00:01:31,843 --> 00:01:34,763
Words from the late,
great Michael Jackson.
7
00:01:35,304 --> 00:01:37,599
Chapel will open at 8:00.
8
00:01:37,933 --> 00:01:42,186
Today's order of services
is Catholic, Evangelical,
9
00:01:42,311 --> 00:01:45,941
Wiccan, Baptist,
other, and Muslim.
10
00:01:46,024 --> 00:01:47,692
Enjoy your Sunday.
11
00:01:58,244 --> 00:02:00,455
(MELLOW SONG PLAYING)
12
00:02:17,597 --> 00:02:20,767
You didn't eat breakfast. Most
important meal of the day.
13
00:02:22,477 --> 00:02:23,979
Start your engine right.
14
00:02:24,062 --> 00:02:25,063
Thanks. I'll, uh...
15
00:02:27,482 --> 00:02:28,483
Thanks.
16
00:02:28,817 --> 00:02:31,027
Fine. Run on fumes.
17
00:02:32,695 --> 00:02:34,238
I'm doing the
4-Hour Body.
18
00:02:34,739 --> 00:02:36,157
I don't know what that is.
19
00:02:36,282 --> 00:02:38,952
Oh, you'll see.
You'll see.
20
00:02:39,452 --> 00:02:41,746
Okay. Good luck
with that.
21
00:03:26,541 --> 00:03:28,543
(CLUCKING)
22
00:03:40,889 --> 00:03:42,557
LORNA: Come closer!
23
00:03:42,682 --> 00:03:46,352
Oh! Fuck me! God!
24
00:03:47,729 --> 00:03:49,480
I could get it.
Fucking come.
25
00:03:49,564 --> 00:03:50,857
(SQUEALING)
26
00:03:50,940 --> 00:03:53,776
Yes! Yeah! Yeah!
You fucking skank!
27
00:03:56,071 --> 00:03:57,030
Yeah!
28
00:03:57,113 --> 00:03:58,406
(MOANING)
29
00:04:00,742 --> 00:04:01,826
Finally!
30
00:04:02,493 --> 00:04:05,997
Man, look how buff my left arm
looks just from grabbling you.
31
00:04:08,166 --> 00:04:09,542
Nichols, we gotta stop.
32
00:04:09,625 --> 00:04:10,668
No, we can't.
33
00:04:10,752 --> 00:04:11,992
I gotta work out
the other side.
34
00:04:12,087 --> 00:04:15,006
Otherwise I'll be asymmetrical
like a crab, or a tennis pro.
35
00:04:15,090 --> 00:04:17,884
No, no, no.
No more. I'm engaged.
36
00:04:17,967 --> 00:04:19,552
Yeah, that's right.
37
00:04:20,511 --> 00:04:21,763
Get it while you can.
38
00:04:21,846 --> 00:04:24,140
No! No, it's not
fair to Christopher.
39
00:04:24,265 --> 00:04:26,226
And I need to
start tightening up.
40
00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:28,269
You're making me
feel like a cave.
41
00:04:28,394 --> 00:04:31,689
Baby, it's a cunt.
Huh? It stretches.
42
00:04:31,898 --> 00:04:34,275
Yeah, sometimes I feel like you're
trying to climb inside my womb.
43
00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:36,277
What can I say,
I've got mommy issues.
44
00:04:36,402 --> 00:04:39,280
Well, I don't want
to do it anymore.
45
00:04:39,405 --> 00:04:41,282
This was the last time.
46
00:04:43,618 --> 00:04:46,955
All right. Yeah, it's cool. Just at
least get me off first, all right?
47
00:04:47,080 --> 00:04:48,915
That's not very classy.
48
00:04:48,998 --> 00:04:50,792
We're having sex
in a fucking chapel.
49
00:04:50,917 --> 00:04:52,397
Come on, you wanna
give me blue balls?
50
00:04:52,627 --> 00:04:54,129
PENNSATUCKY: It's not fair.
I wake up every day and I...
51
00:04:54,254 --> 00:04:55,588
Fuck!
Shit!
52
00:04:59,550 --> 00:05:02,303
I thought you said the service
wasn't for another half hour.
53
00:05:02,428 --> 00:05:04,055
It was. You take
too long to come.
54
00:05:04,139 --> 00:05:07,809
Chaplain, the Jews never put
the markers back in the box.
55
00:05:07,934 --> 00:05:10,103
So write to your Congressman.
56
00:05:10,186 --> 00:05:11,562
What if he's a Jewish?
57
00:05:11,646 --> 00:05:16,234
There is one art cabinet for
everyone and you have to share.
58
00:05:16,317 --> 00:05:20,071
Now, if you please, we need
to get ready for mass.
59
00:05:20,155 --> 00:05:22,740
Sister? The candles.
Yes.
60
00:05:23,491 --> 00:05:24,993
My service is coming up.
61
00:05:25,118 --> 00:05:26,828
I wanna hang up my decoration.
62
00:05:26,953 --> 00:05:28,037
Your decoration?
63
00:05:28,704 --> 00:05:31,958
Yep. Look at it.
I made it in the shop.
64
00:05:32,541 --> 00:05:34,127
Except for it's not
done on account that
65
00:05:34,252 --> 00:05:35,892
I ran out of glow-in-the-dark
paint, but...
66
00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:37,337
Doggett, get it out of here.
67
00:05:37,463 --> 00:05:38,840
What? Why?
68
00:05:38,965 --> 00:05:41,341
You know why. I have
explained it to you.
69
00:05:41,467 --> 00:05:44,220
It's not iconography,
it's a cross.
70
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:45,680
Nothing goes on the walls
71
00:05:45,805 --> 00:05:49,391
that can't be taken down
before the next service.
72
00:05:49,517 --> 00:05:50,768
It's gonna glow in the dark.
73
00:05:50,893 --> 00:05:53,146
Now, Doggett!
74
00:05:54,272 --> 00:05:55,523
You know what? Fine.
75
00:05:56,191 --> 00:05:57,775
That's just fine.
76
00:06:01,279 --> 00:06:03,363
It ain't right,
and you know it.
77
00:06:03,447 --> 00:06:06,075
Well, this chapel is
not just for Christians.
78
00:06:06,201 --> 00:06:09,620
(SCOFFING) Yeah. I'm sure if I was a
Catholic, you would be much different.
79
00:06:09,704 --> 00:06:10,788
That's not true.
80
00:06:10,872 --> 00:06:12,372
Yep. It's very true.
81
00:06:12,498 --> 00:06:15,043
'Cause you and that Pope's
bitch are running this place!
82
00:06:15,710 --> 00:06:18,171
I like to think of myself
as more of the Pope's homie.
83
00:06:18,254 --> 00:06:20,089
PENNSATUCKY: You know what?
84
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:24,135
You treat everybody here better than me.
Even those witch ladies.
85
00:06:24,219 --> 00:06:25,845
Also not true.
86
00:06:25,928 --> 00:06:28,514
No, it is true. You let... You
take them for walks and you...
87
00:06:28,597 --> 00:06:32,852
As I would take you if your faith
required communion with nature.
88
00:06:32,935 --> 00:06:34,896
I don't want to walk! Okay?
89
00:06:35,021 --> 00:06:37,606
I'm gonna hang this damn cross!
90
00:06:37,732 --> 00:06:40,985
'Cause it's my religious freedom
and you're violating it!
91
00:06:45,907 --> 00:06:46,908
BIG BOO: You could sue.
92
00:06:47,075 --> 00:06:49,618
I heard about this
tranny in Massachusetts.
93
00:06:49,744 --> 00:06:52,330
State paid for
her whole hoo-ha.
94
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:53,998
I don't need them
to pay for the car.
95
00:06:54,123 --> 00:06:55,708
I just need them
to buy the oil.
96
00:06:55,833 --> 00:06:57,168
(CHUCKLES)
97
00:06:58,294 --> 00:07:02,631
What exactly is going on with you anyway?
Is it like menopause?
98
00:07:02,840 --> 00:07:04,842
Same idea.
Not enough lady juice.
99
00:07:04,926 --> 00:07:07,803
Skin gets loose, tits get saggy.
Hulk get angry.
100
00:07:07,929 --> 00:07:09,889
Oh, God! Do not do that!
101
00:07:09,972 --> 00:07:11,057
(CHUCKLING)
102
00:07:11,140 --> 00:07:12,433
Jesus.
103
00:07:13,268 --> 00:07:14,269
I know what you can do.
104
00:07:14,394 --> 00:07:17,605
You find an old lady lifer
and you bum her estrogen.
105
00:07:17,813 --> 00:07:20,858
You think the Fed gives a shit
about a felon's hot flashes?
106
00:07:20,942 --> 00:07:22,610
None of that gets covered.
107
00:07:22,693 --> 00:07:25,529
Nun gets it. I'm on
the pill line with her.
108
00:07:25,863 --> 00:07:28,449
Bullshit. It's probably
just anti-depressants.
109
00:07:28,616 --> 00:07:32,161
Oh, really? Ever heard of
an SSRI called Gynotab?
110
00:07:34,330 --> 00:07:38,126
Ow! What the fuck?
Girl, you pulled my hair!
111
00:07:38,251 --> 00:07:39,460
WOMAN OVER PA:
Any available CO
112
00:07:39,585 --> 00:07:40,753
to outer gate for
inmate transfer.
113
00:07:40,836 --> 00:07:43,557
You don't fucking talk to me, but you
want me to thread your eyebrows?
114
00:07:43,631 --> 00:07:45,425
Nobody else can do them right.
115
00:07:45,507 --> 00:07:49,304
Besides, we're family. We fight,
but we do shit for each other.
116
00:07:49,595 --> 00:07:51,222
You gonna let me play dominos?
117
00:07:52,056 --> 00:07:53,515
You can keep score.
118
00:07:54,809 --> 00:07:56,060
You got some thread?
119
00:07:57,645 --> 00:07:59,897
MAN OVER PA:
All personnel, 10-21 Jasmine.
120
00:08:01,023 --> 00:08:03,985
Here. Go find Gloria,
see if she'll trade with you.
121
00:08:04,110 --> 00:08:05,911
If not, I'll pull some
threads from my jacket.
122
00:08:06,654 --> 00:08:07,655
All right.
123
00:08:10,908 --> 00:08:12,534
Hey. What are you doing?
124
00:08:12,952 --> 00:08:13,953
Trading corn.
125
00:08:14,329 --> 00:08:15,729
Inmates aren't
authorized to barter.
126
00:08:15,830 --> 00:08:17,498
What the fuck is "barter"?
Trade.
127
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:18,833
Oh, come on. Everybody trades...
Hey!
128
00:08:18,958 --> 00:08:20,501
You want to get written up?
Is that what you want?
129
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:21,836
What do you want from me?
130
00:08:21,961 --> 00:08:25,756
What do I want?
Less attitude! You got that?
131
00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:28,843
You're not in charge here.
I am.
132
00:08:29,469 --> 00:08:30,636
Now give me the corn.
133
00:08:30,761 --> 00:08:31,929
Yes, sir.
134
00:08:34,807 --> 00:08:36,684
Damn, y'all saw that?
135
00:08:37,643 --> 00:08:40,355
He fucking took my corn!
136
00:08:49,030 --> 00:08:52,408
WOMAN ON TV: Come on down to the
hottest spot south of Havana!
137
00:08:52,533 --> 00:08:54,827
Brazil's Copacabana Beach.
138
00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:56,620
But I would be careful.
139
00:08:56,704 --> 00:08:59,915
Some of the most beautiful
places along the beach are...
140
00:09:07,423 --> 00:09:08,466
Whatcha making?
141
00:09:08,549 --> 00:09:10,676
I'm knitting.
Oh.
142
00:09:13,637 --> 00:09:15,764
I'm sorry, do I smell?
143
00:09:15,890 --> 00:09:19,519
No, she's just in the zone.
How's your Sunday?
144
00:09:19,601 --> 00:09:22,230
Pretty nice so far.
I was outside.
145
00:09:22,522 --> 00:09:25,733
It is beautiful up
here in the fall.
146
00:09:26,192 --> 00:09:27,568
Oh, yeah, sure.
147
00:09:27,651 --> 00:09:31,239
I got myself incarcerated just so
I could see the changing colors.
148
00:09:31,322 --> 00:09:34,242
I'm serious. I think I
need to be outside more.
149
00:09:34,325 --> 00:09:35,576
Weren't you cold?
150
00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:37,245
A little.
But it was lovely.
151
00:09:37,328 --> 00:09:39,372
I had my tea,
it was almost hot.
152
00:09:39,455 --> 00:09:41,416
I had my book,
it was almost good.
153
00:09:41,499 --> 00:09:43,167
And I saw a chicken.
154
00:09:44,419 --> 00:09:45,753
How random is that?
155
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:53,761
What? What?
156
00:09:56,514 --> 00:09:58,891
You saw a chicken? Like, a real
live chicken in the flesh?
157
00:09:58,974 --> 00:10:01,810
Well, it was covered
in feathers, but...
158
00:10:04,146 --> 00:10:05,273
(SIGHING)
159
00:10:10,027 --> 00:10:11,153
What's going on?
160
00:10:11,279 --> 00:10:12,613
You need to talk to Red.
161
00:10:13,406 --> 00:10:14,490
About what?
162
00:10:14,615 --> 00:10:16,242
You just need to talk to her.
163
00:10:19,620 --> 00:10:22,290
WOMAN OVER PA: CO to Main
Control for a shift briefing.
164
00:10:41,142 --> 00:10:43,311
Dayanara!
I unclogged the toilet.
165
00:10:43,436 --> 00:10:45,271
There was a Barbie in it.
166
00:10:46,314 --> 00:10:47,273
Eva?
167
00:10:47,356 --> 00:10:50,025
What? Barbie wanted
to go scuba diving!
168
00:10:52,487 --> 00:10:54,405
Ow, Mommy! Help me!
Aah!
169
00:10:54,489 --> 00:10:56,324
Sucio! Get your caqui fingers off me.
Dios mio!
170
00:10:56,449 --> 00:10:58,326
She's gonna hit me!
171
00:10:58,826 --> 00:10:59,994
You trying to hit your sister?
172
00:11:00,119 --> 00:11:02,246
She flushed a Barbie
down the toilet!
173
00:11:04,665 --> 00:11:06,375
The Barbie Cesar bought you?
174
00:11:07,918 --> 00:11:10,004
You think Barbies
grow on trees?
175
00:11:10,129 --> 00:11:12,714
You think toilets
grow on trees? Huh?
176
00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:13,841
No.
177
00:11:13,924 --> 00:11:15,884
What grows on trees?
Nothing.
178
00:11:16,010 --> 00:11:19,013
That's right! You need to
look after them better.
179
00:11:19,138 --> 00:11:20,181
How about you?
180
00:11:20,348 --> 00:11:21,432
I got better things to do.
181
00:11:22,016 --> 00:11:25,978
Get them a pizza if they're hungry.
I'm eating oysters, bitches.
182
00:11:26,646 --> 00:11:27,896
Whatever.
183
00:11:39,492 --> 00:11:40,576
I want oysters.
184
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:41,869
No, you don't.
185
00:11:42,662 --> 00:11:46,499
You're sure it was a chicken?
Not a pigeon?
186
00:11:46,582 --> 00:11:47,625
No.
187
00:11:48,209 --> 00:11:50,211
What about
a quail or a pheasant?
188
00:11:50,294 --> 00:11:51,587
Spruce grouse?
189
00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:52,754
American bald eagle?
190
00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:55,383
It was a chicken. I know
what a chicken looks like.
191
00:11:55,508 --> 00:11:58,010
I don't...
What's the big deal?
192
00:12:00,429 --> 00:12:04,684
There are no chickens around here.
Except for one.
193
00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:06,935
They say she lived
on a farm near here.
194
00:12:07,061 --> 00:12:09,689
Till one night,
the night before
195
00:12:09,771 --> 00:12:12,400
all the other chickens
were slaughtered,
196
00:12:13,901 --> 00:12:15,570
she escaped.
197
00:12:16,278 --> 00:12:20,241
She's been out there ever
since, living off the land.
198
00:12:21,116 --> 00:12:22,742
Living on her wits.
199
00:12:22,868 --> 00:12:25,079
Hey, what's going on?
200
00:12:25,162 --> 00:12:26,288
The chicken's back.
201
00:12:26,581 --> 00:12:30,084
Oh, give me a break.
Mom, there is no chicken.
202
00:12:30,209 --> 00:12:33,128
You're wrong!
She saw it.
203
00:12:33,254 --> 00:12:34,672
Oh, really?
Mmm-hmm.
204
00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,215
How'd it get over the fence?
205
00:12:36,340 --> 00:12:37,757
I don't know. It flew?
206
00:12:37,883 --> 00:12:40,886
Chickens don't fly. It was
probably a spruce grouse.
207
00:12:40,969 --> 00:12:44,432
No, it was her.
I saw it in a dream.
208
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:47,017
Goodbye.
209
00:12:48,519 --> 00:12:51,939
She came to me,
already dressed in herbs,
210
00:12:52,022 --> 00:12:55,775
and a little top hat,
black, tilted to one side.
211
00:12:55,901 --> 00:12:59,321
And she said, "Soon, Red,
we will be together.
212
00:12:59,447 --> 00:13:01,657
"Soon I will be yours."
213
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,659
No more processed chicken
214
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:07,705
that looks like a hockey puck
and tastes like wet paper.
215
00:13:08,539 --> 00:13:11,208
Real chicken Kiev.
216
00:13:14,545 --> 00:13:17,465
First girl to bag that bird
217
00:13:17,548 --> 00:13:20,635
gets a box of Biore strips.
218
00:13:23,929 --> 00:13:24,972
Me, too?
219
00:13:26,641 --> 00:13:28,392
Yes. You, too.
220
00:13:28,476 --> 00:13:30,102
You did good
bringing this to me.
221
00:13:31,312 --> 00:13:34,148
Maybe you're not as
useless as I thought.
222
00:13:39,111 --> 00:13:41,238
Sister Ingalls.
How was your service?
223
00:13:41,322 --> 00:13:43,324
Oh, fine. Thank you
for asking. Uh...
224
00:13:43,449 --> 00:13:45,326
Sophia. Sophia. That's right.
225
00:13:45,409 --> 00:13:46,868
What was your sermon about?
226
00:13:46,994 --> 00:13:49,497
Oh, I don't give sermons.
I'm not a priest.
227
00:13:49,580 --> 00:13:52,792
But we did have a good group
discussion about overcoming sin.
228
00:13:52,874 --> 00:13:54,293
Oh, I'm sorry I missed that.
229
00:13:54,376 --> 00:13:55,877
Really?
Are you Catholic?
230
00:13:56,003 --> 00:14:00,007
No! But... Well, I think a
lot about overcoming sin.
231
00:14:00,508 --> 00:14:02,760
And I just love Jesus Christ.
232
00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:06,639
And I've always wanted to try
one of those communion wafers.
233
00:14:06,722 --> 00:14:08,724
Well, I have a box
of a thousand.
234
00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:10,850
They're not as fresh as the
ones you get outside of prison,
235
00:14:10,934 --> 00:14:12,019
but they're good with dip.
236
00:14:12,186 --> 00:14:13,521
(LAUGHING)
237
00:14:13,646 --> 00:14:15,564
Oh, I forgot my hat.
238
00:14:15,690 --> 00:14:16,691
Mind if I come with you?
239
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:17,858
Not at all.
240
00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:20,319
PENNSATUCKY: Okay,
higher. Higher.
241
00:14:20,402 --> 00:14:22,321
Yep, higher. Nope, wait!
242
00:14:22,404 --> 00:14:24,490
No! To... Okay, now to...
243
00:14:25,115 --> 00:14:27,702
Look, that doesn't look
centered to me, it just...
244
00:14:27,827 --> 00:14:29,370
Excuse me!
245
00:14:29,995 --> 00:14:32,998
Oh, hey, Sister. Ain't
your time through here?
246
00:14:33,081 --> 00:14:34,375
I thought you weren't
allowed to put that up.
247
00:14:34,500 --> 00:14:35,501
No?
248
00:14:35,710 --> 00:14:38,546
That's what the chaplain
told you this morning.
249
00:14:38,671 --> 00:14:39,755
Oh, yeah, that's right.
250
00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:42,257
You're the little church mouse
that lives in her pocket.
251
00:14:42,675 --> 00:14:44,092
Well, I live in God's pocket.
252
00:14:44,218 --> 00:14:46,019
And she said I couldn't
put it up on the walls,
253
00:14:46,094 --> 00:14:47,346
but she didn't say
I couldn't hang it
254
00:14:47,471 --> 00:14:48,792
from the ceiling,
all right? So...
255
00:14:48,848 --> 00:14:50,432
That's not
a load-bearing pipe.
256
00:14:50,558 --> 00:14:53,435
What do you know about a
load-bearing pipe, lady man?
257
00:14:54,019 --> 00:14:55,688
I think I just told you.
258
00:14:55,813 --> 00:14:57,398
Please.
I'll just get my hat.
259
00:14:57,523 --> 00:14:59,567
It's not my business.
I don't want any trouble.
260
00:14:59,692 --> 00:15:01,652
Trouble? There's not gonna
be any trouble, okay?
261
00:15:01,736 --> 00:15:03,529
This is beautiful.
262
00:15:03,612 --> 00:15:07,408
All right? It's our right as
Americans to religious freedom.
263
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:09,720
Ain't you heard of
the Third Amendment?
264
00:15:09,744 --> 00:15:12,872
Soldiers should not be given quarter
in a house in times of peace?
265
00:15:12,954 --> 00:15:14,714
Is that really what
the Third Amendment says?
266
00:15:14,749 --> 00:15:15,957
I never knew that.
267
00:15:16,083 --> 00:15:17,084
Can you stay out of it?
268
00:15:17,167 --> 00:15:18,419
(PIPE SNAPPING)
(GASPS)
269
00:15:20,170 --> 00:15:22,339
Oh, damn it, Tucky.
I can't go back to seg.
270
00:15:40,023 --> 00:15:42,818
God has chosen to
test our conviction.
271
00:15:47,155 --> 00:15:50,033
So Red's okay with me because
I saw this chicken, I guess.
272
00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:51,952
And she said I wasn't useless.
273
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:54,204
Wow.
274
00:15:54,288 --> 00:15:55,414
Good.
275
00:15:56,039 --> 00:16:00,127
So that's the big
news in my small world.
276
00:16:00,294 --> 00:16:01,420
Um...
277
00:16:03,004 --> 00:16:05,257
What's happening with Barney's?
Did you talk to Weiner?
278
00:16:05,340 --> 00:16:08,844
Yes, I have.
Actually, there is...
279
00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:11,972
Oh, well, it's funny,
but there's a problem.
280
00:16:12,473 --> 00:16:13,515
What?
281
00:16:13,641 --> 00:16:15,517
They have concerns
about our ability to
282
00:16:15,643 --> 00:16:17,519
produce since we
still don't have a space.
283
00:16:17,645 --> 00:16:19,313
You told them that?
They don't need to know that.
284
00:16:19,396 --> 00:16:20,477
Why did you tell them that?
285
00:16:20,898 --> 00:16:22,316
I don't know,
because they asked?
286
00:16:23,901 --> 00:16:25,986
I'm sorry, should I
have texted you first?
287
00:16:26,612 --> 00:16:28,012
We don't have
an official order yet.
288
00:16:28,029 --> 00:16:29,390
They could take
us off the shelves.
289
00:16:29,448 --> 00:16:32,993
Well, you know, I was thinking maybe
that wouldn't be such a bad idea.
290
00:16:35,329 --> 00:16:36,497
Excuse me?
291
00:16:36,580 --> 00:16:39,875
I mean, maybe it's not the best
time to expand our business.
292
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:42,085
Polly, I quit my job for this.
293
00:16:42,169 --> 00:16:44,004
And then you went to prison.
294
00:16:44,087 --> 00:16:46,127
If I'd known you wouldn't
be around to handle things,
295
00:16:46,173 --> 00:16:48,216
I would have delayed the
baby and gotten a puppy.
296
00:16:48,342 --> 00:16:53,180
But I'm the size of Venus and
allergic to dogs, so... Fuck it.
297
00:16:53,305 --> 00:16:54,682
Polly, we were counting
on the extra income.
298
00:16:54,807 --> 00:16:56,183
Please, like you even pay rent.
299
00:16:56,308 --> 00:16:57,685
I pay rent. Who told
you I don't pay rent?
300
00:16:57,810 --> 00:17:00,896
Polly, I know that you're having
a baby, but what about our baby?
301
00:17:00,980 --> 00:17:02,189
What about Baby Poppy?
302
00:17:02,356 --> 00:17:06,067
What if Piper talks to Weiner? You
have more of a rapport, right?
303
00:17:06,193 --> 00:17:07,987
Yes! She likes me!
304
00:17:08,069 --> 00:17:10,698
So, should I see if she'll
drive up with us next week?
305
00:17:10,781 --> 00:17:13,868
No. We can set up a call.
306
00:17:13,951 --> 00:17:16,370
I'll call you, and then
the recording about it
307
00:17:16,453 --> 00:17:18,121
being a call from
prison will play,
308
00:17:18,205 --> 00:17:20,958
and then you can call
her from your phone,
309
00:17:21,041 --> 00:17:23,544
conference her in,
and I can talk to her.
310
00:17:26,005 --> 00:17:27,130
Please?
311
00:17:27,214 --> 00:17:28,465
Two minute warning.
Two minutes.
312
00:17:28,549 --> 00:17:29,717
(PEOPLE EXCLAIM
IN DISAPPOINTMENT)
313
00:17:29,842 --> 00:17:31,552
What? Jesus, they don't
give you any time.
314
00:17:31,677 --> 00:17:34,304
I know. Honey, have you talked
to your dad about Alex?
315
00:17:35,305 --> 00:17:37,516
No, I... Not yet. I will...
316
00:17:37,599 --> 00:17:38,893
Faster, please. Come on.
Okay, well,
317
00:17:38,976 --> 00:17:41,061
I'll ask him about it when
I see him later this week.
318
00:17:41,311 --> 00:17:42,604
Ask him what?
319
00:17:42,980 --> 00:17:45,858
To look over the indictment. To
see if Alex really named her.
320
00:17:45,941 --> 00:17:48,360
Of course she named me.
It's so obvious.
321
00:17:48,443 --> 00:17:50,153
Then why does his
dad need to check?
322
00:17:50,278 --> 00:17:55,200
So I can shove it in her smug,
lying, fucking lying, fucking face.
323
00:17:56,368 --> 00:17:57,745
I know she's lying.
324
00:17:59,747 --> 00:18:02,833
Hold up. What, she's in
here with you? Oh...
325
00:18:05,252 --> 00:18:06,211
Yes.
326
00:18:06,294 --> 00:18:07,713
Why didn't you tell me?
327
00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:08,923
Oh.
328
00:18:09,048 --> 00:18:13,343
You lied to me?
Honey, I didn't lie to you.
329
00:18:13,427 --> 00:18:16,430
I just failed to mention.
I didn't want you to worry.
330
00:18:16,555 --> 00:18:17,765
Worry? Worry about what?
331
00:18:17,890 --> 00:18:19,099
That she'd turn gay again.
332
00:18:19,850 --> 00:18:22,978
Whoa. That's not happening.
And you don't just turn gay.
333
00:18:23,103 --> 00:18:25,064
You fall somewhere on a spectrum.
Like, on a Kinsey scale.
334
00:18:25,146 --> 00:18:26,106
Okay.
335
00:18:26,231 --> 00:18:27,274
(STUTTERS)
336
00:18:27,357 --> 00:18:30,277
Besides, she is the last person
around here that I'd sleep with.
337
00:18:30,402 --> 00:18:31,403
Who's the first?
338
00:18:31,486 --> 00:18:32,487
See? I didn't mean that.
339
00:18:32,613 --> 00:18:34,114
I didn't mean that. I just...
340
00:18:34,197 --> 00:18:35,616
This is exactly why I
didn't want to tell you.
341
00:18:35,699 --> 00:18:38,410
Because I knew that you would do this.
What are you afraid of?
342
00:18:38,493 --> 00:18:40,871
That I'm going to do something?
343
00:18:40,955 --> 00:18:42,081
Gay?
344
00:18:42,163 --> 00:18:44,833
I wasn't before,
until you lied. Now I'm...
345
00:18:44,959 --> 00:18:47,168
Now I'm wondering if maybe
you're worried you will.
346
00:18:47,294 --> 00:18:48,921
Ah. Classic projection.
347
00:18:49,004 --> 00:18:50,130
Polly, don't help.
348
00:18:56,595 --> 00:18:57,805
(SIGHS)
349
00:19:22,746 --> 00:19:26,583
PORNSTACHE: Not only
is the ceiling ripped open.
350
00:19:28,293 --> 00:19:33,007
Not only is the chapel
covered in asbestos,
351
00:19:34,257 --> 00:19:37,678
rat shit, God knows what.
352
00:19:37,803 --> 00:19:38,846
Toxic mold.
353
00:19:38,929 --> 00:19:39,972
Toxic mold.
354
00:19:40,514 --> 00:19:46,687
But, surprise, surprise, our
electrical line has been compromised.
355
00:19:47,104 --> 00:19:49,356
We have to run new electrical.
356
00:19:50,816 --> 00:19:55,070
Officer Luschek,
is running new electrical
357
00:19:55,195 --> 00:19:57,698
something that you
feel particularly
358
00:19:57,823 --> 00:20:00,283
excited about doing
on a fucking Monday?
359
00:20:00,367 --> 00:20:01,368
Nope.
360
00:20:01,451 --> 00:20:02,452
Hell nope.
361
00:20:03,578 --> 00:20:06,999
You ought to be relaxing
after an exhausting weekend of
362
00:20:07,082 --> 00:20:09,877
prostate stimulation
and blow-up fuck dolls.
363
00:20:11,879 --> 00:20:13,296
But instead,
364
00:20:14,255 --> 00:20:19,386
thanks to this missed
opportunity for cradle death,
365
00:20:20,554 --> 00:20:22,347
you're here with me.
366
00:20:23,682 --> 00:20:25,809
And all these
other shit-birds.
367
00:20:29,312 --> 00:20:32,315
And all this shit.
368
00:20:32,399 --> 00:20:34,484
Man, why she ain't in SHU?
369
00:20:34,735 --> 00:20:36,820
Janae got sent to
SHU just for talking.
370
00:20:36,904 --> 00:20:38,279
Quiet, or you'll go with her.
371
00:20:38,655 --> 00:20:41,533
It weren't my fault. I was just
doing as the Spirit commanded.
372
00:20:41,616 --> 00:20:43,118
Fuck are you, Joan of Arc?
373
00:20:44,203 --> 00:20:46,872
No. I'm from Waynesboro.
My name is Tiffany...
374
00:20:46,955 --> 00:20:48,665
She knows what
your fucking name is!
375
00:20:49,917 --> 00:20:51,459
And you guys can kill each
other on your own time.
376
00:20:51,585 --> 00:20:55,005
Hey, Bennett, grab some retards
and go start the demo.
377
00:20:55,672 --> 00:20:56,924
Excuse me.
378
00:20:57,049 --> 00:20:58,258
Yes?
379
00:20:59,009 --> 00:21:00,343
Could we get some masks?
380
00:21:00,427 --> 00:21:01,511
(LAUGHS)
381
00:21:01,595 --> 00:21:04,765
For the mold.
And the rat shit dust.
382
00:21:13,232 --> 00:21:14,441
Bennett, go see if you can find
383
00:21:14,566 --> 00:21:16,235
some dust masks
in the tool shed.
384
00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:17,694
Okay.
385
00:21:17,778 --> 00:21:21,573
Rest of you, go outside. Start
bringing in those sheets of drywall.
386
00:21:21,656 --> 00:21:23,617
Wait a minute!
What?
387
00:21:24,118 --> 00:21:27,328
I don't want "it" here.
388
00:21:27,454 --> 00:21:28,956
Oh, please!
389
00:21:30,249 --> 00:21:31,917
That's why this
whole thing happened.
390
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:34,502
God's angry that there's an
abomination in the church,
391
00:21:34,628 --> 00:21:35,868
and if we don't
get rid of "it,"
392
00:21:35,963 --> 00:21:37,131
it's just gonna
keep on happening.
393
00:21:37,256 --> 00:21:38,465
All right, you listen to me.
394
00:21:38,966 --> 00:21:41,969
You are not
an agent of God, okay?
395
00:21:42,803 --> 00:21:46,807
God can do so much better than you.
You must know that, right?
396
00:21:46,932 --> 00:21:47,891
Know what?
397
00:21:47,975 --> 00:21:51,103
Jesus Christ, how the fuck
did you survive infancy?
398
00:21:51,186 --> 00:21:52,479
My auntie helped my momma...
399
00:21:52,604 --> 00:21:53,814
That's a rhetorical question!
400
00:21:53,939 --> 00:21:57,151
Do you not understand what a
fucking rhetorical question is?
401
00:21:57,234 --> 00:21:58,401
(CHUCKLING)
402
00:21:58,693 --> 00:22:00,654
Sophia just cares
about the church.
403
00:22:00,779 --> 00:22:02,781
And she just wants to help.
Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm!
404
00:22:02,864 --> 00:22:05,242
Help clean up the mess you made.
Mmm-hmm!
405
00:22:05,325 --> 00:22:06,451
PORNSTACHE: You see,
there, Pennsyltucky?
406
00:22:06,534 --> 00:22:08,120
That's just what I've been
saying the whole time.
407
00:22:08,203 --> 00:22:09,955
You're an idiot.
408
00:22:11,999 --> 00:22:14,709
(WHISPERING) I want to fuck
Jesus in his hand-hole.
409
00:22:14,835 --> 00:22:15,919
Mmm.
410
00:22:18,297 --> 00:22:21,091
All right.
Let's get to work.
411
00:23:00,088 --> 00:23:01,422
(SNIFFING)
412
00:23:04,301 --> 00:23:08,138
Hey. I thought that
we might get masks, too?
413
00:23:09,639 --> 00:23:11,390
There's not enough.
414
00:23:13,185 --> 00:23:14,853
That's what you get
for acting uppity.
415
00:23:14,936 --> 00:23:17,356
Okay, so about the chicken...
416
00:23:17,981 --> 00:23:20,234
What about it? It's like Red's
version of the white whale.
417
00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:22,401
No, no, no, I saw it.
I really did.
418
00:23:22,527 --> 00:23:25,239
All right. It's just you
and the crackheads then.
419
00:23:25,322 --> 00:23:27,699
But at least you're getting
in good with Captain Ahab.
420
00:23:27,782 --> 00:23:29,784
Better her ship than the ocean.
421
00:23:30,911 --> 00:23:34,122
So I take it you're not gonna
come look for it after work?
422
00:23:34,248 --> 00:23:35,582
What, the chicken?
423
00:23:35,665 --> 00:23:39,460
We're gonna search the yard.
Morello invited me.
424
00:23:41,380 --> 00:23:44,174
Morello and I are sort of
taking a break. (SNIFFS)
425
00:23:44,423 --> 00:23:46,425
I'm sorry to hear that.
What happened?
426
00:23:46,509 --> 00:23:51,223
Yeah, she still thinks her relationship
with her fiance isn't doomed.
427
00:23:51,723 --> 00:23:53,641
But she'll be back.
428
00:23:54,142 --> 00:23:55,685
Nothing lasts.
429
00:24:01,733 --> 00:24:02,734
Twenty.
430
00:24:05,444 --> 00:24:06,644
You got that?
What's the score?
431
00:24:06,696 --> 00:24:07,739
Oh.
432
00:24:07,989 --> 00:24:09,199
Hold up, let me add it up.
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
433
00:24:09,324 --> 00:24:11,076
What's going on over there?
434
00:24:14,121 --> 00:24:15,289
WOMAN: Come on, chicken!
435
00:24:15,372 --> 00:24:17,832
Red's looking for
the chicken again.
436
00:24:17,958 --> 00:24:19,458
That bitch is crazy.
437
00:24:19,584 --> 00:24:21,460
Who gives a shit
about a chicken?
438
00:24:21,544 --> 00:24:23,745
Maybe it's not the chicken but
what's within the chicken.
439
00:24:24,505 --> 00:24:25,840
You trying to sound deep?
440
00:24:26,258 --> 00:24:30,178
Nah. My boy, Potato Chip, told
me that when he was down,
441
00:24:30,304 --> 00:24:34,391
they used to bring in dope by
putting that shit inside birds.
442
00:24:35,016 --> 00:24:36,559
Chickens?
Nah.
443
00:24:36,643 --> 00:24:38,145
I think it was like
a pigeon or something.
444
00:24:38,270 --> 00:24:39,520
Did they stick it up the butt?
445
00:24:39,646 --> 00:24:43,566
Nah. They put it in a little
baggie, stuff it down the throat.
446
00:24:44,025 --> 00:24:45,735
But maybe they put
it in the butt, too.
447
00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:47,486
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
448
00:24:47,570 --> 00:24:50,657
There's no chicken.
That's a fairy tale.
449
00:24:50,740 --> 00:24:52,200
(ALL CHUCKLE)
450
00:24:54,744 --> 00:24:57,372
My boy said that shit's
worth, like, $1,000, yo.
451
00:24:57,831 --> 00:25:01,001
FLACA: And that's just from
what they put inside a pigeon.
452
00:25:01,626 --> 00:25:04,087
A chicken's got
a much bigger butt.
453
00:25:07,548 --> 00:25:09,009
Are you kidding me?
454
00:25:10,677 --> 00:25:11,678
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
455
00:25:11,845 --> 00:25:14,889
You have to be fucking kidding me.
You too?
456
00:25:15,015 --> 00:25:17,767
I'm not stupid. I'm just
going to watch the stupid.
457
00:25:20,354 --> 00:25:22,897
Yo, Spanish mamis
got something going on.
458
00:25:24,565 --> 00:25:25,733
Ain't you going, too?
459
00:25:25,859 --> 00:25:27,027
(CLICKS TONGUE) No.
460
00:25:27,444 --> 00:25:31,198
No, you'd rather sit
and scribble love notes.
461
00:25:31,906 --> 00:25:33,950
Don't play dumb,
I know what you're doing.
462
00:25:34,034 --> 00:25:36,411
I seen you leave a kite
and I know who for.
463
00:25:36,535 --> 00:25:37,578
You followed me?
464
00:25:37,704 --> 00:25:40,623
I'm telling you, you're wasting
your time with that one.
465
00:25:40,707 --> 00:25:44,211
Not that you're not pretty.
I don't mean it like that.
466
00:25:44,294 --> 00:25:48,673
It's just, you gonna fuck
a guard, fuck a fat one.
467
00:25:48,756 --> 00:25:50,133
That way they're
more appreciative.
468
00:25:50,217 --> 00:25:52,760
Let you sneak in cigarettes.
Maybe bring you McDonald's.
469
00:25:52,927 --> 00:25:54,087
Is that how you really think?
470
00:25:54,179 --> 00:25:55,659
That's how you need
to start thinking.
471
00:25:55,680 --> 00:25:57,057
I'm trying to look out for you.
472
00:25:57,307 --> 00:25:58,975
I don't fuck dudes
for Big Macs.
473
00:25:59,726 --> 00:26:01,311
But you fuck 'em.
Yeah.
474
00:26:01,395 --> 00:26:03,938
So what do you fuck 'em for?
Love?
475
00:26:04,231 --> 00:26:05,482
(EXCLAIMS IN SPANISH)
476
00:26:20,747 --> 00:26:23,417
Daya? Daya!
477
00:26:24,834 --> 00:26:28,380
Hi, baby!
Hello, my little angel.
478
00:26:29,130 --> 00:26:30,798
How you doing?
479
00:26:32,591 --> 00:26:34,052
Where's your
brother and sisters?
480
00:26:34,761 --> 00:26:37,556
I don't know. I'm hungry.
481
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:39,224
There's food in the kitchen.
Why didn't you...
482
00:26:39,307 --> 00:26:40,434
(LOUD LAUGHTER)
483
00:26:44,229 --> 00:26:45,897
Go ahead. I'll go.
484
00:26:48,942 --> 00:26:52,946
And Paco's like, "He's not
an eggplant, he's retarded!"
485
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:54,613
(LAUGHING)
486
00:27:00,454 --> 00:27:01,455
What do you want?
487
00:27:01,580 --> 00:27:03,123
What are you doing in here?
Get out.
488
00:27:03,206 --> 00:27:05,666
Eva's hungry. I need to
make her something to eat.
489
00:27:05,792 --> 00:27:06,952
CESAR: So make her something.
490
00:27:09,379 --> 00:27:12,090
But, hey, you better make me
something, too, if you're in here.
491
00:27:12,173 --> 00:27:14,008
You can't eat that.
It's shaped like animals.
492
00:27:14,134 --> 00:27:16,511
So, I don't give a fuck.
It tastes the same.
493
00:27:16,635 --> 00:27:18,263
But it's made for kids.
494
00:27:18,346 --> 00:27:19,889
I'm just trying to
look out for you,
495
00:27:20,014 --> 00:27:21,600
so people don't
think you're a faggot.
496
00:27:22,934 --> 00:27:26,563
You wanna wear Superman undies
and eat kids' food, be my guest.
497
00:27:26,645 --> 00:27:28,440
Maybe I should get
you a propeller beanie
498
00:27:28,523 --> 00:27:30,275
and you can hang
out on the corner.
499
00:27:30,358 --> 00:27:32,319
(CLICKS TONGUE)
500
00:27:32,444 --> 00:27:33,652
(SIGHS)
501
00:27:37,324 --> 00:27:39,658
Go out and buy some real food.
502
00:27:42,120 --> 00:27:43,455
Keep the change.
503
00:27:45,081 --> 00:27:46,082
Buy a smile?
504
00:27:47,125 --> 00:27:48,335
(SCOFFS)
505
00:27:49,294 --> 00:27:51,838
Cesar, how much longer
we have to do this here?
506
00:27:51,963 --> 00:27:53,381
Not long.
507
00:27:53,507 --> 00:27:56,134
Pepe may have found a new spot.
508
00:27:56,217 --> 00:27:59,513
What's the matter?
You don't like me anymore?
509
00:28:04,934 --> 00:28:06,269
(LAUGHING)
510
00:28:07,604 --> 00:28:08,855
(CURSES IN SPANISH)
511
00:28:09,147 --> 00:28:12,567
YOGA JONES: All right,
extend that rear leg.
512
00:28:13,067 --> 00:28:16,613
Challenge yourselves,
but don't forget to breathe.
513
00:28:16,779 --> 00:28:18,114
What do I do with my arms?
514
00:28:18,198 --> 00:28:19,533
Extend the arms.
515
00:28:20,783 --> 00:28:22,701
Soft eyes, Morello.
516
00:28:26,789 --> 00:28:29,209
Excuse me. What's happening?
517
00:28:29,334 --> 00:28:31,044
We got AA.
518
00:28:31,127 --> 00:28:34,381
No, not right now you don't. We're doing yoga.
This is our time.
519
00:28:34,464 --> 00:28:37,509
Well, they sent us here
'cause the chapel's wrecked.
520
00:28:37,592 --> 00:28:41,471
Now, don't worry. You just keep
on doing what you're doing.
521
00:28:41,555 --> 00:28:45,350
Yeah, let's see one of these
downward facing doggie styles.
522
00:28:46,142 --> 00:28:48,978
PIPER: Soft eyes, Morello.
Soft eyes.
523
00:28:49,062 --> 00:28:52,023
YOGA JONES: This is unacceptable.
Norma, take over for me.
524
00:28:52,106 --> 00:28:53,858
I'm getting Caputo.
525
00:29:03,493 --> 00:29:04,911
I'm sorry, am I disturbing you?
526
00:29:09,416 --> 00:29:12,669
Oh, man, I did it. (SIGHS)
I fucked up your Zen.
527
00:29:12,752 --> 00:29:16,089
No. Wouldn't wanna accidentally
kick you in the face.
528
00:29:19,342 --> 00:29:21,010
"So we do not lose heart.
529
00:29:21,094 --> 00:29:23,763
"Though our outer
self is wasting away,
530
00:29:23,888 --> 00:29:26,558
"our inner self is
being renewed day by day."
531
00:29:27,100 --> 00:29:29,686
What's that?
Corinthians 4:16.
532
00:29:30,437 --> 00:29:32,855
Just something I say to myself
when I think my ass looks fat.
533
00:29:32,980 --> 00:29:34,941
So you do understand what
I've been going through.
534
00:29:35,066 --> 00:29:37,485
I know, changes in
the body can be painful.
535
00:29:37,611 --> 00:29:39,987
But remember,
your body is just the ship.
536
00:29:40,238 --> 00:29:42,031
Your soul is the passenger.
537
00:29:42,115 --> 00:29:43,157
Oh. (CHUCKLES)
538
00:29:43,283 --> 00:29:44,951
There's another passage here.
539
00:29:45,076 --> 00:29:46,620
So you been through menopause?
540
00:29:46,745 --> 00:29:48,288
Oh, yes, dear.
541
00:29:48,788 --> 00:29:51,916
Did you just pray that
you'd get through it?
542
00:29:51,999 --> 00:29:53,042
More or less.
543
00:29:54,043 --> 00:29:56,963
What's the "more" part?
And the "less"?
544
00:29:57,046 --> 00:29:58,757
I also exercised regularly.
545
00:29:58,923 --> 00:30:01,968
See, it's especially
hard for me because
546
00:30:02,051 --> 00:30:05,054
it's taken me so long
to get to this point.
547
00:30:05,138 --> 00:30:09,350
And I'm just not ready
to give it up, you know?
548
00:30:09,476 --> 00:30:11,227
Yes, you said.
549
00:30:11,311 --> 00:30:12,646
And I sacrificed so much.
550
00:30:12,771 --> 00:30:13,813
Right.
551
00:30:13,980 --> 00:30:18,276
And I feel like finally,
finally, I'm the woman
552
00:30:19,319 --> 00:30:22,405
that God intended
me to be, you know?
553
00:30:22,781 --> 00:30:24,741
That's wonderful.
Yeah.
554
00:30:25,325 --> 00:30:26,867
You're not getting my hormones.
555
00:30:27,952 --> 00:30:30,913
Now, shall we
return to Scripture?
556
00:30:32,624 --> 00:30:35,376
You knew? This whole time?
557
00:30:35,710 --> 00:30:36,990
I figured it out
when you thought
558
00:30:37,003 --> 00:30:39,255
"Stations of the Cross"
meant Christian radio.
559
00:30:39,922 --> 00:30:41,341
So you've been playing with me?
560
00:30:41,466 --> 00:30:45,011
You may be unhappy, but it has
nothing to do with your body.
561
00:30:45,136 --> 00:30:48,264
If you were truly a woman, you'd
never be happy with that anyway.
562
00:30:48,348 --> 00:30:49,516
You have guilt.
563
00:30:49,599 --> 00:30:51,017
(SCOFFS)
564
00:30:51,559 --> 00:30:53,186
About what?
565
00:30:53,353 --> 00:30:55,855
About leaving your wife to
take care of Michael alone.
566
00:30:56,981 --> 00:30:58,358
About Michael being...
567
00:30:58,483 --> 00:31:00,026
Don't you talk
to me about that!
568
00:31:00,109 --> 00:31:01,629
You don't get to
talk to me about that.
569
00:31:01,695 --> 00:31:03,822
Sophia!
Leave me alone!
570
00:31:03,904 --> 00:31:06,324
MAN OVER PA: Attention all
personnel, be advised, count.
571
00:31:06,533 --> 00:31:08,368
TAYSTEE:
So there I am, topless,
572
00:31:08,451 --> 00:31:10,953
sitting on this bulldozer,
like, in a construction site.
573
00:31:11,037 --> 00:31:13,914
So I'm sitting there,
barbecue sauce on my titties,
574
00:31:14,040 --> 00:31:16,710
and I'm like,
"What the fuck? Again?"
575
00:31:18,378 --> 00:31:19,838
And then I look down
576
00:31:23,049 --> 00:31:28,137
and I see there's this dude
down on the ground
577
00:31:28,221 --> 00:31:29,930
with his head by,
like, the tire.
578
00:31:30,849 --> 00:31:32,183
And then I look close
579
00:31:32,266 --> 00:31:34,310
and I recognize it's the
bum from the night before
580
00:31:34,394 --> 00:31:37,063
that was hollerin' at me
outside of Pizzeria Uno.
581
00:31:37,188 --> 00:31:41,192
And when I look closer, I see
the dude is wearing my shirt
582
00:31:41,275 --> 00:31:44,404
and he's got barbecue sauce
all over his face and he's...
583
00:31:46,573 --> 00:31:47,657
He's dead.
584
00:31:49,576 --> 00:31:53,371
And that's when I knew it was
time to make a change. Thank you.
585
00:31:55,081 --> 00:31:58,835
Almost the exact same thing happened
to me, but it was tuna salad.
586
00:31:58,959 --> 00:32:01,588
YOGA JONES: All right.
We will now,
587
00:32:01,671 --> 00:32:04,257
once again,
go into a forward bend,
588
00:32:04,758 --> 00:32:08,511
and when you're ready,
relax back into Shavasana.
589
00:32:08,887 --> 00:32:11,431
Anyone else feel
like sharing today?
590
00:32:12,891 --> 00:32:13,892
Anybody?
591
00:32:13,974 --> 00:32:14,975
I'll share.
592
00:32:23,943 --> 00:32:26,279
I don't have a great
rock-bottom story
593
00:32:26,362 --> 00:32:29,783
because my rock bottom
is happening right now.
594
00:32:30,450 --> 00:32:35,455
Not that you're not all great, but I
guess I just thought I'd never be here.
595
00:32:36,289 --> 00:32:41,127
You know, I thought I was
someone who was in control.
596
00:32:41,669 --> 00:32:43,713
And I was in control,
for a while.
597
00:32:44,589 --> 00:32:46,674
When I only dealt heroin.
598
00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:49,969
Not even dealt.
I mean, I was an importer.
599
00:32:53,306 --> 00:32:58,018
But, yeah, I was going through
a break-up, and it was around.
600
00:32:59,562 --> 00:33:02,106
Actually, I think it's more accurate
to say that I was abandoned.
601
00:33:03,149 --> 00:33:07,612
But, anyway, I started using.
602
00:33:07,695 --> 00:33:09,322
Are you finished?
603
00:33:10,072 --> 00:33:12,283
Yes, thank you.
That was wonderful.
604
00:33:12,366 --> 00:33:15,328
Heroin was the best
girlfriend that I ever had.
605
00:33:15,411 --> 00:33:18,456
You know, she always
made me feel better,
606
00:33:19,833 --> 00:33:22,042
and she was always available.
607
00:33:24,337 --> 00:33:26,417
But even the best girls
will fuck you over, you know?
608
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:29,717
Yeah, you would fucking
know, wouldn't you?
609
00:33:35,515 --> 00:33:38,559
Damn, I thought yoga
was supposed to relax you.
610
00:33:38,685 --> 00:33:41,562
HOWARD: You want to know
if she fingered her?
611
00:33:42,062 --> 00:33:43,439
I think that's
been established.
612
00:33:43,564 --> 00:33:45,859
Please, Dad. No jokes.
I can't take it right now.
613
00:33:45,942 --> 00:33:47,151
Howard, leave him alone.
614
00:33:47,234 --> 00:33:48,361
You leave me alone.
615
00:33:48,486 --> 00:33:50,112
Larry, have you
weatherized yet?
616
00:33:50,196 --> 00:33:52,615
I know it looks tacky,
but if you put up the plastic,
617
00:33:52,699 --> 00:33:54,179
you'll save a lot
of money on heating.
618
00:33:54,200 --> 00:33:56,035
Those windows are very old.
619
00:33:56,160 --> 00:33:58,037
I'm going to, Mom.
620
00:33:58,621 --> 00:34:00,581
And I'm sorry I'm
late with the rent.
621
00:34:00,707 --> 00:34:03,042
It's all right. As long as you
take care of us when we're dying.
622
00:34:03,125 --> 00:34:05,461
Though you might want to think
about getting a job at some point.
623
00:34:05,545 --> 00:34:09,048
He has a job. He's a writer.
All it takes is one article.
624
00:34:09,131 --> 00:34:10,884
For what?
To get paid 50 bucks?
625
00:34:10,967 --> 00:34:14,178
To lead to bigger things. You have
any projects you're working on?
626
00:34:14,303 --> 00:34:16,931
Yes, Mom, thank you.
As a matter of fact, I do.
627
00:34:17,056 --> 00:34:18,307
I'm working on
an article right now.
628
00:34:18,391 --> 00:34:19,642
What's it about?
629
00:34:19,726 --> 00:34:23,021
It's a trend piece, about
something called edging.
630
00:34:28,902 --> 00:34:33,406
It's when you have sex or
masturbate without coming.
631
00:34:34,407 --> 00:34:37,035
Without coming?
That sounds unhealthy.
632
00:34:37,117 --> 00:34:39,495
A man needs to come.
Larry, tell me you're coming.
633
00:34:39,579 --> 00:34:40,621
I shouldn't have said anything.
634
00:34:40,747 --> 00:34:44,250
Howard, tell Larry he needs to come.
You could get blocked up!
635
00:34:44,375 --> 00:34:45,459
I'll tell him.
636
00:34:45,585 --> 00:34:46,627
Listen to your father.
637
00:34:46,753 --> 00:34:49,255
You two want some soup?
The girl made soup.
638
00:34:49,380 --> 00:34:51,173
Soup would be nice.
I'm fine. Thank you.
639
00:34:51,257 --> 00:34:53,259
I'll get for both of you.
640
00:34:57,055 --> 00:35:00,725
Dad, please. I know you don't like
Piper, but I'm asking you to help me.
641
00:35:00,808 --> 00:35:01,935
Who said I don't like her?
642
00:35:02,018 --> 00:35:03,394
I like her. She's the nicest
felon you've ever dated.
643
00:35:03,477 --> 00:35:04,687
Stop.
644
00:35:05,271 --> 00:35:07,774
I just think she's a bit wispy.
645
00:35:07,899 --> 00:35:09,609
I thought you'd end up with
someone more substantial.
646
00:35:09,734 --> 00:35:12,570
Are you talking about her moral
character or the size of her breasts?
647
00:35:12,653 --> 00:35:14,113
Please. I'm an ass man.
648
00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:15,615
He's an ass man.
649
00:35:17,199 --> 00:35:18,952
You asked about her girlfriend?
650
00:35:19,077 --> 00:35:20,327
Ex-girlfriend.
651
00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:23,414
I have looked over
the indictment.
652
00:35:24,123 --> 00:35:25,124
And?
653
00:35:25,291 --> 00:35:30,630
It states that, unequivocally,
Alex Vause gave her name.
654
00:35:31,380 --> 00:35:32,590
(SIGHS)
655
00:35:33,758 --> 00:35:35,134
Good. Thank you.
656
00:35:35,426 --> 00:35:36,970
Good? How is that good?
657
00:35:37,261 --> 00:35:40,056
It's good that
Piper'll know for sure.
658
00:35:40,389 --> 00:35:43,768
And she'll hate her more,
so she'll stay away from her.
659
00:35:44,644 --> 00:35:46,646
Listen, Larry, don't tell her.
Why?
660
00:35:47,855 --> 00:35:49,065
Prison is a fishbowl, son.
661
00:35:49,148 --> 00:35:51,025
The last thing she needs
is an enemy to obsess over,
662
00:35:51,150 --> 00:35:52,693
do something
stupid out of anger.
663
00:35:52,819 --> 00:35:55,488
She should serve her time
and leave without any trouble.
664
00:35:56,322 --> 00:35:57,698
I'm not gonna lie
to my fiancee.
665
00:35:57,824 --> 00:35:58,825
Why not?
666
00:35:58,950 --> 00:36:01,077
Because our relationship
doesn't work that way.
667
00:36:01,160 --> 00:36:04,998
Oh, yes, yes. It's based
on trust and honesty.
668
00:36:05,081 --> 00:36:06,666
Even though she
neglected to tell you
669
00:36:06,791 --> 00:36:08,751
that she's in there
with this Alex until now?
670
00:36:08,835 --> 00:36:11,587
Okay, first of all,
it's only been three weeks,
671
00:36:11,671 --> 00:36:15,382
and she didn't want to tell me because
she didn't want me to get upset.
672
00:36:15,508 --> 00:36:17,010
So, why should you upset her?
673
00:36:19,720 --> 00:36:20,972
No. (SCOFFS)
674
00:36:21,764 --> 00:36:23,933
No. I'm not gonna
lie to protect her
675
00:36:24,017 --> 00:36:26,185
like she's some
helpless thing, okay?
676
00:36:27,061 --> 00:36:29,522
Honesty is the best policy.
I really believe that.
677
00:36:31,065 --> 00:36:33,734
Larry, remember
all those special
678
00:36:33,860 --> 00:36:36,487
achievement ribbons
you earned as a child?
679
00:36:37,530 --> 00:36:38,698
Yeah.
680
00:36:38,781 --> 00:36:41,200
You notice how there was
never a public ceremony?
681
00:36:41,325 --> 00:36:44,537
You did win that one for
tidiest cubby in preschool.
682
00:36:44,662 --> 00:36:46,706
But the truth is...
683
00:36:49,625 --> 00:36:50,751
...overrated.
684
00:36:51,669 --> 00:36:57,550
My advice, keep her focused on her life
outside, her business, her friends.
685
00:36:58,217 --> 00:36:59,886
The wedding.
686
00:37:00,011 --> 00:37:01,888
Whether or not you actually
go through with it.
687
00:37:03,931 --> 00:37:08,102
Here, Larry. Eat your soup. You're
the best soup eater in America.
688
00:37:10,604 --> 00:37:12,606
POUSSEY: He's got it!
689
00:37:14,608 --> 00:37:16,110
Find that chicken,
babe, you got it?
690
00:37:17,070 --> 00:37:18,071
Chicken!
691
00:37:19,739 --> 00:37:20,698
(CLUCKING)
692
00:37:20,781 --> 00:37:22,408
Here, chicky, chicky, chicky.
693
00:37:24,535 --> 00:37:26,245
What's going on?
694
00:37:26,579 --> 00:37:30,249
There's $1,000 inside a chicken somewhere.
Everyone's looking for it.
695
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:33,002
What?
RED: You.
696
00:37:34,253 --> 00:37:35,963
This is your fault.
Huh?
697
00:37:36,089 --> 00:37:38,758
You've been blabbing all over
about the chicken, haven't you?
698
00:37:38,925 --> 00:37:40,259
Not really.
699
00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:43,137
But even if I had, you never
told me it was a secret.
700
00:37:43,262 --> 00:37:45,389
Because I thought
you had common sense.
701
00:37:45,472 --> 00:37:48,267
Black girls hear about a chicken,
of course this will happen.
702
00:37:48,475 --> 00:37:50,310
Why, because all
black people love chicken?
703
00:37:50,436 --> 00:37:51,687
Don't be racist.
704
00:37:51,771 --> 00:37:53,064
Because they're all on heroin,
705
00:37:53,147 --> 00:37:56,192
and somebody's been telling them
there's heroin in the chicken.
706
00:37:56,275 --> 00:37:57,443
I heard it's a gun.
707
00:37:57,526 --> 00:37:59,445
Okay, I had nothing
to do with this.
708
00:37:59,528 --> 00:38:02,240
You cannot blame this on me.
I just told you what I saw.
709
00:38:02,322 --> 00:38:04,117
Right, what you "saw."
710
00:38:04,242 --> 00:38:06,827
Why are you using air quotes?
Are you saying that I'm lying?
711
00:38:06,953 --> 00:38:08,537
Maybe you wanted
to impress people.
712
00:38:08,621 --> 00:38:10,957
I did not even know this was
a thing that was impressive.
713
00:38:11,082 --> 00:38:14,543
If she hasn't been scared off, the
Spanish or the blacks have her.
714
00:38:14,668 --> 00:38:17,213
Those Spanish probably
won't even eat her,
715
00:38:17,296 --> 00:38:19,381
just cut her throat
and drink her blood,
716
00:38:19,465 --> 00:38:21,550
or something
else superstitious.
717
00:38:22,009 --> 00:38:23,719
All I wanted was
to eat the chicken
718
00:38:23,803 --> 00:38:25,471
that is smarter
than other chickens
719
00:38:25,596 --> 00:38:27,347
and to absorb its power.
720
00:38:27,848 --> 00:38:30,810
And make a nice Kiev.
But, oh, well.
721
00:38:34,563 --> 00:38:37,483
So, what?
You're just gonna give up?
722
00:38:39,652 --> 00:38:40,694
Huh?
723
00:38:41,862 --> 00:38:43,656
Just because of
a little competition?
724
00:38:45,158 --> 00:38:46,617
That chicken is out there, Red,
725
00:38:46,700 --> 00:38:49,369
and it's waiting for you.
To eat it.
726
00:38:50,329 --> 00:38:53,833
And you have been waiting for
a very long time to eat it.
727
00:38:54,458 --> 00:38:56,836
What do those other girls
have that you don't have?
728
00:38:56,919 --> 00:38:58,004
They have dogs.
729
00:38:58,129 --> 00:39:01,299
Dogs does not a chicken catch.
730
00:39:02,633 --> 00:39:04,260
Determination, Red.
731
00:39:05,094 --> 00:39:06,887
That's what catches chickens.
732
00:39:07,847 --> 00:39:09,307
Who wants that
chicken the most?
733
00:39:09,849 --> 00:39:12,977
Who will prepare
that chicken most expertly?
734
00:39:14,020 --> 00:39:16,522
The woman who dreams about it.
735
00:39:17,190 --> 00:39:20,526
The woman who was born
to eat that chicken.
736
00:39:23,362 --> 00:39:24,363
You.
737
00:39:25,156 --> 00:39:26,615
(DOG BARKING)
738
00:39:29,243 --> 00:39:33,122
That's mine!
That's my chicken!
739
00:39:33,331 --> 00:39:35,124
(BELL RINGING)
740
00:39:35,208 --> 00:39:36,876
(WOMEN CLAMORING)
741
00:39:37,751 --> 00:39:40,546
What the hell is
the matter with you?
742
00:39:40,629 --> 00:39:42,715
You tryin' out for
the retard Olympics?
743
00:39:43,423 --> 00:39:46,219
Somebody shove some
dynamite up your ass?
744
00:39:48,387 --> 00:39:50,264
Do you want to get shot?
745
00:39:51,182 --> 00:39:55,394
Trust me. We got a lot of
bullets up in that guard tower.
746
00:39:56,562 --> 00:39:59,773
So if that's what you want,
just try that shit again.
747
00:40:03,069 --> 00:40:05,821
You are not supposed to run.
748
00:40:06,239 --> 00:40:08,866
Remind me never
to listen to you.
749
00:40:10,117 --> 00:40:12,786
So, why are you running? Huh?
750
00:40:16,082 --> 00:40:18,500
For a fucking chicken?
751
00:40:18,667 --> 00:40:21,837
Who the fuck told you there
was a chicken in my yard?
752
00:40:54,870 --> 00:40:56,122
But that's not fair!
753
00:40:56,205 --> 00:40:58,082
It's more than fair.
754
00:40:58,165 --> 00:41:01,460
You know the rules about running.
Who's next?
755
00:41:01,543 --> 00:41:02,628
Chapman.
756
00:41:05,714 --> 00:41:08,259
You're gonna have a swell
time down the hill, blondie.
757
00:41:08,926 --> 00:41:10,970
Trust me, he's gonna break you.
758
00:41:11,053 --> 00:41:13,306
HEALY: Yes, thank you.
759
00:41:13,431 --> 00:41:15,975
And that was not necessary.
760
00:41:16,058 --> 00:41:18,185
Please close the door
on your way out.
761
00:41:18,978 --> 00:41:20,218
MAN OVER PA:
Attention, inmates.
762
00:41:20,313 --> 00:41:23,649
Multiple code violations will
result in loss of privileges.
763
00:41:23,774 --> 00:41:26,485
So, I'm not sure if I
have the rumor straight.
764
00:41:26,652 --> 00:41:31,740
Is the chicken filled with money,
or heroin, or guns, or candy?
765
00:41:31,824 --> 00:41:33,784
No, no. Mr. Healy, this is...
766
00:41:33,867 --> 00:41:36,078
I'm not sending
you down the hill.
767
00:41:36,162 --> 00:41:38,331
You made a mistake.
You're new.
768
00:41:39,290 --> 00:41:40,499
Thank you.
769
00:41:40,582 --> 00:41:44,086
Probably just wanted to impress
people, be a big shot.
770
00:41:45,587 --> 00:41:48,674
So you started making up stories.
No!
771
00:41:48,757 --> 00:41:52,303
It's all right.
I understand.
772
00:41:52,386 --> 00:41:53,720
You think this
is the first time
773
00:41:53,846 --> 00:41:56,223
that I've heard
about the "chicken"?
774
00:41:56,765 --> 00:42:02,188
It's popular fiction. It's like
global warming or female ejaculation.
775
00:42:02,271 --> 00:42:05,191
No! No. No, it's not.
This is real.
776
00:42:05,858 --> 00:42:07,443
How is it real?
777
00:42:08,527 --> 00:42:09,778
Wait, which?
778
00:42:09,862 --> 00:42:12,031
The chicken. And the...
779
00:42:14,700 --> 00:42:16,118
The chicken.
780
00:42:17,203 --> 00:42:20,580
There's a triple razor wire
fence around this camp.
781
00:42:20,706 --> 00:42:22,333
It's impossible.
782
00:42:22,416 --> 00:42:24,918
And if you think that
chickens can fly, well,
783
00:42:25,044 --> 00:42:27,505
we better go to
Wikipedia right away.
784
00:42:27,963 --> 00:42:30,216
Oh, my God,
you have the Internet.
785
00:42:30,341 --> 00:42:34,761
Look, I don't care if you've
seen this thing or not.
786
00:42:35,137 --> 00:42:39,225
But I don't want you exciting the
other inmates with this kind of talk.
787
00:42:39,392 --> 00:42:41,519
They're not like you and me.
788
00:42:42,228 --> 00:42:46,065
They're less reasonable.
Less educated.
789
00:42:47,066 --> 00:42:50,444
And I don't want you
making up stories to Red.
790
00:42:50,569 --> 00:42:52,905
You know how
Russians love chicken.
791
00:42:54,031 --> 00:42:57,743
Moving forward, I want you
to keep your head down.
792
00:42:58,744 --> 00:43:01,080
Don't make any more
boastful claims.
793
00:43:01,830 --> 00:43:03,290
Don't...
See a chicken.
794
00:43:03,416 --> 00:43:04,750
Exactly.
795
00:43:04,875 --> 00:43:06,335
Now, repeat after me.
796
00:43:06,419 --> 00:43:09,505
BELL: There is no chicken.
There never was any chicken.
797
00:43:09,588 --> 00:43:12,841
The chicken is an urban myth.
A grand illusion.
798
00:43:12,925 --> 00:43:15,094
Something to give
your life meaning,
799
00:43:15,177 --> 00:43:17,263
but which is in fact not there.
800
00:43:18,013 --> 00:43:20,057
We will make a poster.
801
00:43:21,016 --> 00:43:22,851
Yo, chicken lady.
802
00:43:23,561 --> 00:43:26,230
I got my visitation
revoked 'cause of you.
803
00:43:30,650 --> 00:43:32,278
What'd you get?
804
00:43:33,862 --> 00:43:35,114
(SCOFFS)
805
00:43:35,614 --> 00:43:36,990
I should've fuckin' known.
806
00:43:38,867 --> 00:43:42,121
I don't mess with no heroin,
but I love me some candy.
807
00:43:42,580 --> 00:43:44,790
You better watch it with the stories.
I didn't...
808
00:43:49,795 --> 00:43:50,963
(SIGHS)
809
00:43:53,173 --> 00:43:56,051
MAN OVER PA: Bravo dorms,
assemble for visitation hall.
810
00:43:56,843 --> 00:43:58,178
Still open?
811
00:44:03,642 --> 00:44:05,311
In some tribal cultures,
812
00:44:05,394 --> 00:44:08,897
the transgender person
is regarded as a shaman.
813
00:44:09,773 --> 00:44:11,817
Trying to convert
me to paganism now?
814
00:44:11,900 --> 00:44:13,444
Whatever works.
815
00:44:13,527 --> 00:44:15,154
It's not a very
Catholic thing to say.
816
00:44:15,279 --> 00:44:18,491
I'm not here as a Catholic,
I'm here as a friend.
817
00:44:19,866 --> 00:44:22,578
I'll cut your hair. But I ain't
giving you no confession.
818
00:44:23,203 --> 00:44:27,207
I already know how I feel.
I let 'em down.
819
00:44:29,293 --> 00:44:31,086
You're still here.
820
00:44:31,629 --> 00:44:34,214
And the best thing you can
do for them is be strong.
821
00:44:34,340 --> 00:44:37,259
Inside. You already
have the Playboy body.
822
00:44:37,343 --> 00:44:38,969
What are you
doing reading Playboy?
823
00:44:39,303 --> 00:44:41,054
Oh, I read everything.
824
00:44:43,223 --> 00:44:45,351
Why did God have to give me
that stupid penis?
825
00:44:45,434 --> 00:44:46,519
I don't know.
826
00:44:46,602 --> 00:44:49,021
Any more than I know
why he gave men nipples.
827
00:44:49,687 --> 00:44:51,440
There are mysteries.
828
00:44:51,524 --> 00:44:53,567
And as a Catholic,
I enjoy them.
829
00:44:54,360 --> 00:44:56,362
The mysteries, that is.
830
00:44:56,945 --> 00:44:58,989
Well, I enjoy the nipples.
831
00:44:59,823 --> 00:45:02,075
So now they think that I'm a liar.
That I made it up.
832
00:45:02,201 --> 00:45:06,372
I don't understand. Why would I
make something like that up?
833
00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:08,248
I don't know.
834
00:45:08,374 --> 00:45:10,459
Hey, you have that call
with Weiner later, right?
835
00:45:10,543 --> 00:45:11,669
Yes.
836
00:45:11,751 --> 00:45:13,462
You ready?
I'm ready.
837
00:45:13,546 --> 00:45:18,509
That's good. Because I can't ask my
parents for any more money, okay?
838
00:45:18,592 --> 00:45:22,054
No. Yes. And I can't
ask mine either.
839
00:45:22,179 --> 00:45:25,849
Okay, we can't ask anyone's
parents for any more money.
840
00:45:25,932 --> 00:45:28,477
So make it a slam dunk, all right?
Yes.
841
00:45:28,561 --> 00:45:30,062
By the time you
get out of prison,
842
00:45:30,145 --> 00:45:31,605
you'll be
a big-time soap baron,
843
00:45:31,813 --> 00:45:35,568
I'll be a famous journalist,
and we'll start our life.
844
00:45:35,651 --> 00:45:38,904
Life already has started.
I'm in here.
845
00:45:38,987 --> 00:45:40,406
And I'm here with you.
846
00:45:40,531 --> 00:45:42,740
But let's just be honest with
each other, okay, Pipes?
847
00:45:42,824 --> 00:45:44,784
I wanna know what's going on.
848
00:45:44,910 --> 00:45:47,329
Yes. I'm sorry that I
didn't tell you about Alex.
849
00:45:48,288 --> 00:45:49,289
It's okay.
850
00:45:49,415 --> 00:45:51,749
It has nothing to do with
me being attracted to her.
851
00:45:51,833 --> 00:45:54,253
Really. I just...
852
00:45:54,336 --> 00:45:55,795
I didn't want you to
know that I was in here
853
00:45:55,921 --> 00:45:59,132
with somebody
that I hate so much.
854
00:45:59,258 --> 00:46:02,135
Oh, my God, I swear,
sometimes when I'm around her,
855
00:46:02,261 --> 00:46:04,012
I feel like I'm going crazy.
856
00:46:04,096 --> 00:46:07,349
Well, as long as
you keep your figure.
857
00:46:07,891 --> 00:46:10,269
Hey, did I tell you what
happened in yoga? No.
858
00:46:10,352 --> 00:46:13,188
She was just there.
Trying to antagonize me.
859
00:46:13,980 --> 00:46:18,360
I swear, Larry, I could
smash her in the face.
860
00:46:19,111 --> 00:46:22,114
Okay, well, don't... Don't
do anything like that. Okay?
861
00:46:23,115 --> 00:46:24,950
Anyhow, about Alex...
862
00:46:25,117 --> 00:46:26,993
Oh, my God.
I bet it was her.
863
00:46:28,078 --> 00:46:30,372
I bet she's the one who's been
spreading rumors about me.
864
00:46:30,456 --> 00:46:33,667
I bet she told everybody
that I lied about the chicken!
865
00:46:33,791 --> 00:46:37,296
Okay, Piper, let's drop the chicken for now.
It's not important.
866
00:46:37,379 --> 00:46:38,338
It's my rep!
867
00:46:38,464 --> 00:46:41,300
Piper, it's not important.
This is real life.
868
00:46:41,425 --> 00:46:45,345
Please don't get dragged
into the prison drama.
869
00:46:45,471 --> 00:46:49,266
Look, I know it's like a fishbowl
in there, but try. Focus.
870
00:46:49,349 --> 00:46:50,589
Larry, I know
that you're right,
871
00:46:50,643 --> 00:46:51,727
but I have to
live in this fishbowl
872
00:46:51,809 --> 00:46:53,479
and it's just...
873
00:46:54,062 --> 00:46:56,440
WOMAN: Just let him do his
krumping and have a good time.
874
00:46:56,523 --> 00:46:57,775
...hard.
875
00:46:59,735 --> 00:47:00,778
I know.
876
00:47:02,780 --> 00:47:04,740
So, what were you saying?
877
00:47:04,822 --> 00:47:06,992
Oh. About Alex.
878
00:47:07,117 --> 00:47:08,868
I talked to my dad
about the indictment.
879
00:47:10,537 --> 00:47:11,622
And?
880
00:47:16,543 --> 00:47:20,464
She didn't name you. I guess it
was someone else from the ring.
881
00:47:25,010 --> 00:47:26,844
Piper, are you there?
Yeah, I'm here.
882
00:47:27,429 --> 00:47:29,723
Did you hear me?
Yes, I heard you.
883
00:47:29,847 --> 00:47:32,017
I know it's surprising,
but this is...
884
00:47:32,100 --> 00:47:33,519
Pipes, this is good, really,
885
00:47:33,602 --> 00:47:37,815
because now you don't have
to feel crazy, or angry.
886
00:47:37,897 --> 00:47:43,737
You can just do your time and
stay away from that asshole.
887
00:47:44,946 --> 00:47:47,407
It's just that,
Larry, now this...
888
00:47:49,951 --> 00:47:52,162
This means that
I'm the asshole.
889
00:47:52,621 --> 00:47:54,122
MAN OVER PA:
Swing shift guard detail.
890
00:47:54,206 --> 00:47:57,501
P.m. cell check to
commence at 2130 hours.
891
00:47:58,460 --> 00:48:00,504
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
892
00:48:10,556 --> 00:48:11,557
(INHALES)
893
00:48:40,126 --> 00:48:42,212
What are you talking about,
Cesar can't make it?
894
00:48:42,295 --> 00:48:43,616
I don't know.
That's what he said.
895
00:48:43,672 --> 00:48:45,072
I take a fall for
that motherfucker,
896
00:48:45,090 --> 00:48:46,425
the least he could do is visit.
897
00:48:48,134 --> 00:48:50,928
Is he paying rent?
Is he buying groceries?
898
00:48:51,012 --> 00:48:52,347
Yeah, but I don't want
him in the apartment.
899
00:48:52,431 --> 00:48:54,932
Why? Is he
bringing girls home?
900
00:48:55,058 --> 00:48:56,268
No. Because he...
901
00:48:56,351 --> 00:48:58,687
Hey, I have an idea, you
want to ask how we're doing?
902
00:48:58,771 --> 00:49:00,814
Mommy.
Answer the question.
903
00:49:00,938 --> 00:49:02,274
Is he fucking around?
904
00:49:02,733 --> 00:49:04,818
I did answer the question.
905
00:49:04,942 --> 00:49:07,320
You know we took a bus
three hours to get here?
906
00:49:07,446 --> 00:49:10,115
Mommy, I made a paper airplane.
907
00:49:11,074 --> 00:49:12,242
Are you fucking him?
908
00:49:12,367 --> 00:49:14,160
Please. You have
got to be kidding me.
909
00:49:15,662 --> 00:49:17,122
LUCY: Mommy!
What?
910
00:49:17,205 --> 00:49:18,624
I made a paper airplane.
911
00:49:18,749 --> 00:49:20,793
(SIGHS) Where's your
stupid paper airplane?
912
00:49:20,918 --> 00:49:22,001
At home.
913
00:49:22,127 --> 00:49:23,336
Well, then why do I care?
914
00:49:23,462 --> 00:49:26,223
You want to show me something? You
can't show me something I can't see!
915
00:49:27,132 --> 00:49:28,216
What are you, stupid?
916
00:49:31,386 --> 00:49:34,598
You tell that motherfucker
he better visit. He owes me.
917
00:49:34,681 --> 00:49:37,476
WOMAN OVER PA: When in the visitation
room, you're allowed two hugs.
918
00:49:38,017 --> 00:49:40,479
One on arrival,
and one on departure.
919
00:49:46,485 --> 00:49:47,778
Good, you're home.
920
00:49:49,404 --> 00:49:52,073
Won't you make us
something to eat?
921
00:50:00,123 --> 00:50:01,750
Take off. Be out.
922
00:50:05,420 --> 00:50:07,798
How your tits be so big,
your mom's so small, huh?
923
00:50:07,881 --> 00:50:09,090
Well, I guess I
get 'em from my dad.
924
00:50:09,174 --> 00:50:10,383
Yeah?
925
00:50:24,982 --> 00:50:26,358
You said five minutes.
926
00:50:26,441 --> 00:50:28,610
Please. I just need
five more minutes.
927
00:50:28,735 --> 00:50:32,280
That's all. This is a very
important phone call.
928
00:50:32,364 --> 00:50:35,408
I'm on hold. (WHISPERING)
It's about my company.
929
00:50:35,534 --> 00:50:38,035
Man, I doubt you even got a company.
You all talk.
930
00:50:38,370 --> 00:50:39,705
See, there you go.
931
00:50:39,830 --> 00:50:41,247
POLLY: Piper?
Are you still there?
932
00:50:41,373 --> 00:50:42,708
Yes, I'm right here.
What's going on?
933
00:50:42,791 --> 00:50:43,991
I'm in a conference with Weiner
934
00:50:44,041 --> 00:50:45,642
on the other line.
How do I punch you in?
935
00:50:46,378 --> 00:50:47,754
I don't know, it's your phone.
936
00:50:47,880 --> 00:50:50,131
Ugh. All right, hold on. I have to ask Pete.
I'll be right back.
937
00:50:50,215 --> 00:50:51,424
No, no, no! Polly, wait, I don't...
Pete!
938
00:50:51,550 --> 00:50:53,635
Polly, Polly, Polly...
939
00:50:53,760 --> 00:50:55,387
MAN OVER PA:
Please revise count.
940
00:50:55,512 --> 00:50:57,973
It is not clear.
Please conduct a recount.
941
00:51:05,981 --> 00:51:07,024
Oh.
942
00:51:09,943 --> 00:51:11,904
Hey. Hey!
943
00:51:11,987 --> 00:51:13,780
Hey! Hey! Hey!
944
00:51:13,906 --> 00:51:15,106
Hey! Get off, man!
There it is!
945
00:51:15,156 --> 00:51:17,074
Look!
There it is! There's the...
946
00:51:17,200 --> 00:51:19,912
Hey! Hey! Are you
using the phone?
947
00:51:20,037 --> 00:51:21,038
Yes! I'm on hold.
948
00:51:21,120 --> 00:51:24,374
Hey! Hey! Make your call
or free up the phone now.
949
00:51:29,671 --> 00:51:31,256
Okay, Piper?
I figured it out.
950
00:51:31,339 --> 00:51:33,540
Everyone's on the other line.
I'm punching you in, okay?
951
00:51:34,259 --> 00:51:37,512
Piper? Piper, are you there?
952
00:51:37,679 --> 00:51:39,848
Dandelion ain't here right now.
953
00:51:39,932 --> 00:51:41,474
She gone to chase the chicken.
954
00:51:46,438 --> 00:51:47,606
(CLUCKING)
955
00:51:49,190 --> 00:51:50,442
PORNSTACHE: Chapman!
956
00:51:52,151 --> 00:51:53,952
What did I tell you
about running in the yard?
957
00:51:53,987 --> 00:51:55,280
I'm sorry, sir.
It's just that...
958
00:51:55,405 --> 00:51:56,907
Both feet on the ground
at all times. What?
959
00:51:56,990 --> 00:52:00,077
Nothing. Just trying to get
some fitness, that's all.
960
00:52:00,159 --> 00:52:02,829
Two speeds in my yard.
Walk and shuffle.
961
00:52:19,096 --> 00:52:20,430
(CLUCKING)
962
00:53:04,850 --> 00:53:15,279
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com