1
00:00:06,739 --> 00:00:07,740
(THEME SONG PLAYING)
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00:01:02,311 --> 00:01:13,186
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
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Don't fucking touch it.
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We'll take care
of it from here.
5
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(GUARD ANNOUNCING OVER PA)
6
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This shit better be
spotless when I get back.
7
00:02:10,070 --> 00:02:12,698
Here you go. It's okay.
8
00:02:14,033 --> 00:02:16,076
Wow. It's tight in here
with three people, huh?
9
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Tell me how it's also dark at
night and cold in the snow.
10
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(DAYANARA COUGHING)
11
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Hey, hey, you're gonna need
to clean that up.
12
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That's all you gotta say to
the mother of your child?
13
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You have to be quiet, please.
14
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I'm sorry. Are you okay?
Can I do anything or...
15
00:02:28,047 --> 00:02:31,091
So what do you want? Hurry it up.
It fucking stinks in here.
16
00:02:31,217 --> 00:02:33,058
I have a plan. It's
a pretty good one, I think.
17
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You see, I told you.
18
00:02:34,554 --> 00:02:35,638
So there's this
thing called furlough,
19
00:02:35,721 --> 00:02:37,056
where they grant an inmate
temporary leave...
20
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I know what furlough is.
21
00:02:38,516 --> 00:02:40,601
They don't actually give
that shit to anyone. Ever.
22
00:02:40,726 --> 00:02:42,395
It's rare, yes.
But my uncle knows the warden.
23
00:02:42,478 --> 00:02:43,688
I think we can make an appeal.
24
00:02:43,770 --> 00:02:45,981
For the love of your poor,
long-suffering grandma.
25
00:02:46,065 --> 00:02:47,066
Mama Lourdes?
26
00:02:47,191 --> 00:02:50,570
Ay, Mama Lourdes is so mean,
she's gonna outlive all of us.
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He's talking about a fake
abuela, who's really sick.
28
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Then fake abuela fake dies.
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00:02:56,741 --> 00:02:59,181
And you get to leave for the
weekend to go to her fake funeral.
30
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What's that have to
do with the baby?
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Ay, Dios mio, between
the two of yous,
32
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this child's gonna be
100% retard. I swear.
33
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When you start to show
and we can't hide it anymore,
34
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we tell everyone
that you got your pussy
35
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fucked while you
were on furlough.
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Peg-leg Pete here gets to keep his
job and no one knows shit. Get it?
37
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Yo, that shit is smart.
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Thanks.
39
00:03:21,601 --> 00:03:22,976
But it ain't never gonna work.
40
00:03:23,102 --> 00:03:25,104
Like you're the first person
who ever tried this game.
41
00:03:25,187 --> 00:03:28,441
Well, it's all we have, right?
So, I'll submit it today.
42
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Just do your best
to hide the puking.
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(VOMITING)
44
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Hi.
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00:03:43,664 --> 00:03:46,584
Larry Bloom. I'm here
for Urban Tales.
46
00:03:46,667 --> 00:03:47,668
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
47
00:03:47,793 --> 00:03:50,212
Great. You can have a seat.
Maury's not quite ready for you.
48
00:03:50,296 --> 00:03:52,336
Can I get you anything while you wait?
Water? Coffee?
49
00:03:58,011 --> 00:03:59,138
Sir?
50
00:03:59,930 --> 00:04:02,808
Sorry... Yes. Water,
please. Would be great.
51
00:04:02,891 --> 00:04:05,645
Got to keep the vocal
chords hydrated, you know?
52
00:04:06,771 --> 00:04:07,854
Too eager?
53
00:04:07,980 --> 00:04:09,231
Just a little.
Okay. Thank you.
54
00:04:28,167 --> 00:04:30,002
You here for Urban Tales?
55
00:04:30,085 --> 00:04:31,671
I am, yeah. Ben Palmer.
56
00:04:31,837 --> 00:04:33,464
Larry Bloom.
57
00:04:34,214 --> 00:04:36,008
Does your boyfriend
live far away?
58
00:04:38,844 --> 00:04:43,890
My fiancee is in prison.
She's a she. She's a girl.
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00:04:44,016 --> 00:04:46,185
The cardigan threw me.
60
00:04:46,310 --> 00:04:49,855
So, prison? That's gotta be
some rough stuff, huh?
61
00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:54,735
Yeah.
It's very difficult.
62
00:04:54,985 --> 00:04:56,529
How about you?
63
00:04:56,612 --> 00:04:59,948
My husband's a scientist down
at McMurdo in Antarctica.
64
00:05:00,032 --> 00:05:02,368
So, it's a different
kind of prison.
65
00:05:02,493 --> 00:05:06,872
Jeez. Yeah, that's like, as
long distance as you can get.
66
00:05:07,039 --> 00:05:09,834
Haven't seen him
in almost two years.
67
00:05:11,335 --> 00:05:12,961
Where's your fiancee locked up?
68
00:05:13,086 --> 00:05:14,714
She's upstate.
69
00:05:14,839 --> 00:05:19,009
I get to see her,
you know, pretty often.
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00:05:20,594 --> 00:05:21,679
Ready, guys?
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00:05:23,764 --> 00:05:25,725
It's gonna be a great show.
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00:05:27,017 --> 00:05:29,812
I'm sorry...
Okay. Thanks.
73
00:05:30,020 --> 00:05:32,398
NICKY: Hey, heard your dude's
gonna be on the radio tomorrow.
74
00:05:32,857 --> 00:05:34,567
What? Where did
you hear that?
75
00:05:36,527 --> 00:05:41,407
Well, a little birdie who listens to
NPR in her transport van told me.
76
00:05:41,532 --> 00:05:42,616
You didn't know?
77
00:05:42,742 --> 00:05:43,826
No, I had no idea.
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00:05:43,908 --> 00:05:46,161
I have not been able to get
in touch with him for a week.
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00:05:46,245 --> 00:05:48,581
Maybe he's cheating
on me with Maury Kind.
80
00:05:48,913 --> 00:05:52,585
Oh. Then you'd both be gay.
So post-modern.
81
00:05:52,877 --> 00:05:54,628
You know, it's like
the sole purpose
82
00:05:54,754 --> 00:05:56,547
of these things is
to end up tangled.
83
00:05:56,672 --> 00:05:59,132
Why has no one
figured out a solution yet?
84
00:05:59,299 --> 00:06:00,634
All right, Seinfeld.
Calm down.
85
00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:02,321
You in a hurry to
hang yourself with it?
86
00:06:05,305 --> 00:06:08,851
Less than 24 hours
and you're making a joke?
87
00:06:08,933 --> 00:06:10,310
Someone is dead.
88
00:06:10,561 --> 00:06:13,522
Jesus Christ. You having
your red dot special?
89
00:06:13,606 --> 00:06:16,609
Communists in your
funhouse? Crimson tide?
90
00:06:17,610 --> 00:06:18,943
Okay, perfect.
91
00:06:19,027 --> 00:06:22,531
By all means, attribute my legitimate
feelings of sadness to menses.
92
00:06:22,907 --> 00:06:24,491
You really just say menses?
93
00:06:24,617 --> 00:06:25,618
That's gross.
94
00:06:25,743 --> 00:06:26,744
You're gross.
95
00:06:26,869 --> 00:06:27,912
Great comeback.
96
00:06:27,994 --> 00:06:31,164
Excuse me, inmate?
What did you say to me?
97
00:06:32,625 --> 00:06:35,461
Hey, Chapman. Oh!
Pick your battles.
98
00:06:36,629 --> 00:06:39,381
Didn't your vacation on the sunny
island of SHU teach you anything?
99
00:06:39,548 --> 00:06:41,926
Are they really not gonna
have a memorial for her?
100
00:06:42,050 --> 00:06:43,469
Are you kidding?
101
00:06:43,636 --> 00:06:46,764
The administration cares about
burying the story, not her.
102
00:06:47,013 --> 00:06:48,432
Well, fuck that.
103
00:06:49,099 --> 00:06:54,396
Everybody deserves a funeral. I'm
gonna organize something for her.
104
00:06:54,563 --> 00:06:56,816
You barely knew her.
What are you doing?
105
00:06:58,066 --> 00:06:59,610
I'm untangling.
106
00:07:00,152 --> 00:07:03,113
Have you ever seriously
considered suicide?
107
00:07:05,658 --> 00:07:08,160
What are you?
One of those hippy-dippy docs?
108
00:07:08,285 --> 00:07:10,704
Like, if I told you I was
dreaming about a pineapple
109
00:07:10,830 --> 00:07:13,916
you would ask me if I wanna
have sex with my mama? Hmm?
110
00:07:14,166 --> 00:07:15,542
Have you experienced
any of the following
111
00:07:15,668 --> 00:07:17,127
during the last two weeks?
Anxiety?
112
00:07:17,252 --> 00:07:19,755
Of course I've
experienced anxiety.
113
00:07:19,922 --> 00:07:21,924
You think this is an easy job?
114
00:07:22,007 --> 00:07:25,511
Having to heal the whole world
with just these 10 fingers.
115
00:07:25,636 --> 00:07:26,679
It's a lot of pressure.
116
00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:27,847
Loss of appetite?
117
00:07:27,972 --> 00:07:30,683
What does that have to do with anything?
Hmm? Doc?
118
00:07:31,517 --> 00:07:35,228
You know, it's people like you
that give America a bad name.
119
00:07:35,354 --> 00:07:38,691
You all go squawking around talking
about guns being dangerous,
120
00:07:38,774 --> 00:07:42,361
when all you want to do is shove
pills down people's throats.
121
00:07:42,444 --> 00:07:45,823
When all they need is
just a little bit of faith.
122
00:07:46,490 --> 00:07:50,911
Ask me about my appetite. Why? Because
I'm just naturally kind of skinny?
123
00:07:51,036 --> 00:07:53,038
Miss Doggett, if you could
please just answer the question.
124
00:07:53,163 --> 00:07:55,081
I have answered the question.
125
00:07:55,207 --> 00:07:58,377
I'm not crazy. I'm chosen.
There's a difference.
126
00:07:58,460 --> 00:08:00,921
Now, if you just let
me out of this cage,
127
00:08:01,046 --> 00:08:03,549
we can both get
back to our jobs.
128
00:08:05,425 --> 00:08:06,802
Please?
129
00:08:06,886 --> 00:08:09,304
You've stated that you believe God is
speaking to you and allowing you...
130
00:08:09,388 --> 00:08:14,393
(GROANS) I don't have
to believe, Doc. I know.
131
00:08:14,476 --> 00:08:16,228
Why don't you just go ask
some of the other girls?
132
00:08:16,353 --> 00:08:17,938
They're all gonna tell you.
133
00:08:18,063 --> 00:08:23,986
I've been healing ailments left and right.
Miracle. There's proof.
134
00:08:24,236 --> 00:08:25,571
These hallucinations
you've been having...
135
00:08:25,738 --> 00:08:28,198
I'm not having
fucking hallucinations!
136
00:08:28,323 --> 00:08:30,784
I don't belong in here!
Come on!
137
00:08:30,951 --> 00:08:32,077
Miss Doggett...
138
00:08:32,202 --> 00:08:33,286
I'm not a freaking animal,
get me out!
139
00:08:33,453 --> 00:08:34,747
Miss Doggett,
when you calm down
140
00:08:34,872 --> 00:08:36,916
I will get you on a sedative,
take you to a nice room...
141
00:08:37,041 --> 00:08:41,503
I don't need any sedatives!
Jesus has my back!
142
00:08:41,587 --> 00:08:44,048
Please! Doc!
143
00:08:45,591 --> 00:08:48,134
Doc, come back!
144
00:08:51,096 --> 00:08:54,850
An inmate is dead and a crippled
delinquent was attacked.
145
00:08:54,934 --> 00:08:58,270
What happened yesterday
was an epic fuckup, people.
146
00:08:58,395 --> 00:09:00,105
All of you better get
on your knees tonight
147
00:09:00,188 --> 00:09:03,358
and pray that none of those kids'
families sue the shit out of the DOC,
148
00:09:03,442 --> 00:09:05,778
because we're all out
of a job if they do.
149
00:09:05,861 --> 00:09:08,447
You think she's gonna get
on her knees tonight?
150
00:09:08,572 --> 00:09:10,824
Something funny, gentlemen?
151
00:09:10,950 --> 00:09:11,950
Hi. I was just wondering,
152
00:09:11,992 --> 00:09:13,577
is there gonna be an investigation
into Miller's death?
153
00:09:13,660 --> 00:09:14,954
Our manual says that
the FBI is supposed
154
00:09:15,079 --> 00:09:16,359
to be informed
anytime there's...
155
00:09:16,455 --> 00:09:17,831
This was
a clear-cut suicide case.
156
00:09:17,957 --> 00:09:19,332
There's nothing to investigate.
157
00:09:19,458 --> 00:09:22,795
The body was cremated.
May she rest in peace.
158
00:09:24,964 --> 00:09:29,468
So, the warden has asked us to draft
a memo to distribute to the inmates,
159
00:09:30,677 --> 00:09:34,640
telling them that we care, the
services that are available, etc.
160
00:09:34,723 --> 00:09:36,016
You've got to be kidding me.
161
00:09:36,475 --> 00:09:39,478
I'm sorry, but how is this a
good use of our time, exactly?
162
00:09:39,561 --> 00:09:40,562
Excuse me?
163
00:09:40,938 --> 00:09:43,607
I don't know about the rest of
you, but I've got real work to do.
164
00:09:43,690 --> 00:09:45,358
Sit down.
165
00:09:46,151 --> 00:09:47,653
Unless you want me
to tell the warden
166
00:09:47,778 --> 00:09:49,279
that you refused
to participate.
167
00:09:53,158 --> 00:09:54,534
So, who wants to begin?
168
00:09:55,327 --> 00:09:57,370
We should offer our
condolences, right?
169
00:09:57,496 --> 00:09:59,247
Insurance companies
always tell you not
170
00:09:59,372 --> 00:10:01,166
to apologize when
you're in an accident.
171
00:10:01,249 --> 00:10:02,751
Admits fault.
172
00:10:03,085 --> 00:10:06,505
Just say,
"Being locked up sucks.
173
00:10:06,630 --> 00:10:08,924
"But that's no
reason to hang yourself,
174
00:10:09,008 --> 00:10:11,677
"slit your wrists or chug
10 bottles of NyQuil."
175
00:10:12,469 --> 00:10:14,220
Mendez out.
176
00:10:14,596 --> 00:10:16,849
You think a dead prisoner
is a joke, Mendez?
177
00:10:16,932 --> 00:10:18,308
Something to make light of?
178
00:10:19,101 --> 00:10:20,185
Let me be clear.
179
00:10:20,268 --> 00:10:23,022
When these women are at
Litchfield, they're in our care.
180
00:10:23,147 --> 00:10:25,816
And yesterday, we failed.
181
00:10:25,941 --> 00:10:30,737
A girl died because of us.
All of us.
182
00:10:32,531 --> 00:10:35,993
So quit fucking around and
show some goddamn humanity.
183
00:10:36,201 --> 00:10:38,120
(EXHALES)
Heavy stuff, huh?
184
00:10:38,203 --> 00:10:39,913
Yeah. It's so hard
to believe.
185
00:10:40,706 --> 00:10:42,582
What are you doing tonight?
186
00:10:42,708 --> 00:10:45,068
Nothing. Probably gonna watch
some SportsCenter, hit the hay.
187
00:10:45,127 --> 00:10:47,963
You want to...
Want to get a drink?
188
00:10:48,380 --> 00:10:49,548
You know I would,
I have a thing...
189
00:10:49,673 --> 00:10:50,841
Come on.
190
00:10:50,924 --> 00:10:52,551
Don't be a pussy. One drink.
191
00:10:52,634 --> 00:10:54,887
You can watch your gay
sports show tomorrow.
192
00:10:55,595 --> 00:10:57,681
Yeah. All right. Cool.
193
00:10:58,557 --> 00:10:59,597
See you in the parking lot.
194
00:11:04,563 --> 00:11:08,192
Hey. I wanna order some of that ginger gum.
I got some commissary credit.
195
00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:10,069
There's ginger
ale at commissary.
196
00:11:10,234 --> 00:11:12,905
No, I tried that shit. I got
a really bad stomach thing.
197
00:11:14,238 --> 00:11:15,281
What's my name?
198
00:11:15,407 --> 00:11:17,241
What?
I said, what's my name?
199
00:11:18,535 --> 00:11:19,661
I don't know.
200
00:11:19,786 --> 00:11:22,664
Exactly. All day long it's,
"Get me this, get me that."
201
00:11:22,748 --> 00:11:24,750
There are,
what, 250 women in here?
202
00:11:24,875 --> 00:11:27,836
Is it that hard to know my name?
I bet you know Red's name.
203
00:11:27,920 --> 00:11:29,253
We can't help you.
204
00:11:29,421 --> 00:11:30,589
What?
205
00:11:37,137 --> 00:11:38,555
Look, I don't mean no problems.
206
00:11:38,680 --> 00:11:40,099
Gloria said I
should ask in here.
207
00:11:40,224 --> 00:11:44,477
No problem. Gina's a sensitive little
squirrel when she's on the rag.
208
00:11:45,020 --> 00:11:46,772
Your daughter's pregnant, yes?
209
00:11:46,939 --> 00:11:48,899
What? No.
210
00:11:49,608 --> 00:11:51,235
There's this stomach
thing going around.
211
00:11:51,359 --> 00:11:52,945
She hasn't eaten in weeks.
212
00:11:53,028 --> 00:11:56,823
She's nauseous all the time but
still has a glow on her skin.
213
00:11:57,323 --> 00:11:58,784
It's none of your business.
214
00:11:58,909 --> 00:12:01,954
You bring it into my kitchen,
you make it my business.
215
00:12:05,457 --> 00:12:09,128
Okay, Sherlock.
Yes. You got it.
216
00:12:09,628 --> 00:12:11,295
PORNSTACHE: You're out
of bounds, inmate!
217
00:12:11,379 --> 00:12:13,423
Get the fuck out of here.
218
00:12:45,914 --> 00:12:47,249
Hey, what's your sign?
219
00:12:47,331 --> 00:12:50,794
Yo! My sign is get your ass up
and help me with this shit.
220
00:12:51,503 --> 00:12:54,173
You don't wanna know what the
planets have in store for you,
221
00:12:54,298 --> 00:12:56,091
that's your business.
222
00:12:56,216 --> 00:12:58,384
Man, the planets have
jail in store for me.
223
00:12:58,510 --> 00:12:59,469
(CHUCKLING)
224
00:12:59,552 --> 00:13:01,833
And some more of the same
tomorrow, and the day after that.
225
00:13:01,847 --> 00:13:03,515
Yeah.
Aries.
226
00:13:03,682 --> 00:13:05,017
All right.
227
00:13:05,142 --> 00:13:08,061
"It might be an excellent
time to take a trip
228
00:13:08,187 --> 00:13:11,106
"or see a new
part of the world.
229
00:13:11,190 --> 00:13:13,650
"Expand your horizons,
dear Aries."
230
00:13:14,860 --> 00:13:19,281
Yo! (CHUCKLES)
Expand your horizons, boo.
231
00:13:19,363 --> 00:13:20,364
Stupid.
232
00:13:21,074 --> 00:13:22,408
This is for the birds.
233
00:13:22,575 --> 00:13:25,578
Hate to break it to you, son,
but we the birds.
234
00:13:25,745 --> 00:13:28,456
If you want me to read yours,
all you had to do was ask.
235
00:13:28,540 --> 00:13:29,749
What's your sign?
236
00:13:29,875 --> 00:13:31,084
Taurus.
237
00:13:31,210 --> 00:13:35,672
Oh, yeah, you a stubborn bull,
all right. Okay.
238
00:13:37,090 --> 00:13:39,051
"The news that
you've been waiting for
239
00:13:39,176 --> 00:13:41,053
"might be
delivered in a few days,
240
00:13:41,178 --> 00:13:43,429
"and will likely be positive.
241
00:13:43,555 --> 00:13:45,265
"Gather your loved ones around,
242
00:13:45,389 --> 00:13:48,977
"in case you need extra support
for the changes to come."
243
00:13:49,102 --> 00:13:50,354
Yo, your appeal.
244
00:13:50,478 --> 00:13:52,147
I don't think that's
any of your business.
245
00:13:53,773 --> 00:13:54,858
Excuse me.
246
00:13:54,983 --> 00:13:57,736
So, what's up? You really
believe in all that stuff?
247
00:13:57,861 --> 00:14:01,031
Sure do. But this
paper's eight months old.
248
00:14:01,365 --> 00:14:03,533
What?
Mmm-hmm.
249
00:14:03,950 --> 00:14:05,869
(LAUGHING)
250
00:14:09,039 --> 00:14:10,082
(DOOR OPENING)
251
00:14:14,294 --> 00:14:15,295
Oh.
252
00:14:16,338 --> 00:14:17,923
Okay. Here's some advice,
253
00:14:18,048 --> 00:14:20,759
when a girl makes you cum
the way that I do,
254
00:14:20,884 --> 00:14:23,262
you should always act
thrilled to see her.
255
00:14:23,345 --> 00:14:24,429
Stop it.
256
00:14:24,554 --> 00:14:28,100
Okay. You're not in the mood
to banter, I withdraw my bant.
257
00:14:30,518 --> 00:14:31,519
Mmm.
258
00:14:31,603 --> 00:14:34,856
I asked some of the girls to come
help me plan a memorial for Tricia,
259
00:14:34,940 --> 00:14:37,276
nobody showed up.
I don't get it.
260
00:14:37,401 --> 00:14:40,279
I guess I'm the only one who
cares if there is a funeral.
261
00:14:40,362 --> 00:14:43,323
Okay. That's not the most self-involved
thing I've heard you say,
262
00:14:43,448 --> 00:14:45,325
but it's definitely up there.
263
00:14:45,450 --> 00:14:49,037
Please. Alex, will you stop
pretending like nothing happened?
264
00:14:49,246 --> 00:14:52,124
Pipes, you can't force people to
mourn the way you want them to
265
00:14:52,207 --> 00:14:53,292
just because it'll
make you feel better.
266
00:14:53,417 --> 00:14:54,500
That's not what I'm doing.
267
00:14:54,626 --> 00:14:55,961
Really?
No!
268
00:14:56,586 --> 00:14:59,005
'Cause I think we both know that
dealing with emotional chaos
269
00:14:59,131 --> 00:15:01,466
is not one of
your strong suits.
270
00:15:01,967 --> 00:15:05,887
Which is why we're not having an
affair, we're just being human.
271
00:15:05,971 --> 00:15:07,806
And why you are
planning a memorial
272
00:15:07,973 --> 00:15:09,808
for a girl that
you barely knew.
273
00:15:09,891 --> 00:15:11,393
We talked. I did know her.
274
00:15:11,601 --> 00:15:13,979
Did you know her better
than you knew my mom?
275
00:15:18,984 --> 00:15:20,026
That's not fair.
276
00:15:23,905 --> 00:15:25,157
None of it was fair.
277
00:15:28,534 --> 00:15:32,580
Look, life gets
messy sometimes.
278
00:15:34,207 --> 00:15:36,376
You know, you gotta learn
you can't always fix it.
279
00:15:36,460 --> 00:15:41,881
Heigh-ho, heigh-ho.
It's off to work I go. Oh!
280
00:15:42,174 --> 00:15:45,635
Don't mind me, ladies. Just
gonna do a little buffering.
281
00:15:46,428 --> 00:15:48,138
All in a day's work.
282
00:15:52,392 --> 00:15:57,189
♪ Vanilla and vanilla
283
00:15:57,272 --> 00:16:00,442
♪ Swirl, swirl
284
00:16:00,525 --> 00:16:03,111
♪ Swirl, swirl ♪
285
00:16:03,320 --> 00:16:06,198
You know, I don't actually think it's
a swirl if it's the same flavor.
286
00:16:06,281 --> 00:16:07,949
You know, if you
were still my wife,
287
00:16:08,033 --> 00:16:11,953
I would tell you all the time
how much I like your titties.
288
00:16:12,954 --> 00:16:15,374
'Cause girls like that.
289
00:16:16,375 --> 00:16:20,586
And that is
a tip from me to you.
290
00:16:21,963 --> 00:16:23,589
Alex, I miss you.
291
00:16:23,840 --> 00:16:25,342
I don't have time
to wander around
292
00:16:25,467 --> 00:16:26,968
flea markets and drink
cafe au lait with you.
293
00:16:27,135 --> 00:16:29,721
But I'm so cute.
Look how cute I am.
294
00:16:30,305 --> 00:16:32,891
Babe, I'm sorry.
I'm so fucking stressed.
295
00:16:32,974 --> 00:16:35,727
But you're always
so fucking stressed.
296
00:16:36,686 --> 00:16:38,897
I feel like
a pathetic housewife.
297
00:16:42,275 --> 00:16:44,403
Is this our life now?
298
00:16:46,571 --> 00:16:48,365
Hey. Hey.
299
00:16:52,618 --> 00:16:57,332
Let me take you out tonight, okay?
Anywhere you want to go.
300
00:16:59,792 --> 00:17:00,835
Okay?
301
00:17:03,171 --> 00:17:04,256
Okay.
302
00:17:07,217 --> 00:17:08,260
Hey,
303
00:17:10,178 --> 00:17:12,764
would you be up for a trip
to Istanbul this weekend?
304
00:17:12,889 --> 00:17:14,474
Yes! Of course!
305
00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:17,394
Oh, babe, that's great.
Thank you.
306
00:17:17,477 --> 00:17:19,563
I think you should be able to
get there and back in a day,
307
00:17:19,645 --> 00:17:21,898
so you won't even
have to stay overnight.
308
00:17:22,023 --> 00:17:24,276
I'm gonna call and set
up your ticket for you.
309
00:17:24,443 --> 00:17:25,818
Oh, my God.
310
00:17:25,944 --> 00:17:28,071
I thought for a second you
meant we would go together.
311
00:17:28,154 --> 00:17:31,157
Like a vacation.
Like normal people.
312
00:17:31,783 --> 00:17:33,452
I need you to do this.
313
00:17:33,535 --> 00:17:35,412
I wouldn't ask if I
had any another option.
314
00:17:35,495 --> 00:17:39,665
I specifically told you that
I would never do that again.
315
00:17:40,041 --> 00:17:43,169
Jesus, I am so stupid.
316
00:17:43,462 --> 00:17:45,964
I really am. I'm just
another drug mule to you.
317
00:17:46,131 --> 00:17:48,300
You are such
a naive asshole sometimes.
318
00:17:48,383 --> 00:17:49,426
I'm an asshole?
319
00:17:49,509 --> 00:17:52,304
I'm drowning right now and you
won't even consider helping me.
320
00:17:52,471 --> 00:17:55,474
I am done. I can't do this anymore.
I can't be with you.
321
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,309
Are you serious?
Where are you gonna go?
322
00:17:57,434 --> 00:17:59,018
I don't know
where I'm gonna go.
323
00:17:59,144 --> 00:18:00,103
I'm gonna go
back to the States,
324
00:18:00,186 --> 00:18:01,146
where I'm not your errand girl.
325
00:18:01,271 --> 00:18:03,482
I can't believe I didn't see this coming.
How did I not see this...
326
00:18:03,607 --> 00:18:05,448
You know what, I did see this coming.
Years ago.
327
00:18:05,484 --> 00:18:08,236
Rule number one. Don't ever fall
in love with a straight girl.
328
00:18:08,361 --> 00:18:11,739
Is that what you think this is about?
That I like dick?
329
00:18:11,823 --> 00:18:13,543
You know, I guess that
is easier than facing
330
00:18:13,617 --> 00:18:15,285
the fact that you
are a drug dealer.
331
00:18:15,743 --> 00:18:18,997
And it is ruining
everything good in your life.
332
00:18:20,290 --> 00:18:22,375
Don't you dare push this on me.
333
00:18:24,169 --> 00:18:26,379
You knew exactly
what you were getting into.
334
00:18:28,673 --> 00:18:30,675
I thought we were a team.
335
00:18:41,060 --> 00:18:44,439
This shit is weird. Why
aren't we playing dominoes?
336
00:18:45,940 --> 00:18:48,026
And what's she doing here?
337
00:18:51,321 --> 00:18:52,864
You gotta fuck Pornstache.
338
00:18:52,989 --> 00:18:56,701
What the fuck? What are
you even talking about?
339
00:18:59,371 --> 00:19:03,875
If you want to keep your baby and
Bennett, this is the only way.
340
00:19:03,958 --> 00:19:06,378
Otherwise, you don't get both.
341
00:19:07,253 --> 00:19:08,713
You just gotta
get him to fuck you.
342
00:19:08,796 --> 00:19:12,133
Then you go to Caputo, and tell
him that Pornstache raped you,
343
00:19:12,217 --> 00:19:13,926
you got the proof.
344
00:19:14,052 --> 00:19:15,720
The proof is in the pudding,
as they say.
345
00:19:16,179 --> 00:19:18,473
You let soldier boy
dream about his furlough.
346
00:19:18,557 --> 00:19:20,559
It ain't gonna happen.
347
00:19:20,642 --> 00:19:22,852
Girls in here miss
their own mother's funeral.
348
00:19:22,935 --> 00:19:25,055
And I think we all know
your mother's doing just fine.
349
00:19:25,104 --> 00:19:27,148
I don't care.
350
00:19:27,232 --> 00:19:30,443
I won't cheat on John.
I love him.
351
00:19:30,652 --> 00:19:31,861
Of course,
352
00:19:31,944 --> 00:19:34,406
which is exactly why
this is your only option.
353
00:19:35,490 --> 00:19:37,659
We've all known
girls in your situation,
354
00:19:37,783 --> 00:19:39,911
and do you know
what happens to them?
355
00:19:40,036 --> 00:19:43,748
They get punished.
Sent out to the SHU.
356
00:19:43,831 --> 00:19:46,459
Transferred to
maximum security.
357
00:19:46,585 --> 00:19:48,836
And when it comes out that
Bennett is the father,
358
00:19:48,920 --> 00:19:51,047
he'll be arrested
and convicted as
359
00:19:51,172 --> 00:19:53,299
a sex offender and
he'll go to prison, too.
360
00:19:54,426 --> 00:19:56,428
This is bigger than you.
361
00:19:57,011 --> 00:20:00,139
Every decision you make now
affects your family.
362
00:20:00,848 --> 00:20:02,559
Welcome to motherhood.
363
00:20:06,605 --> 00:20:11,568
Even if I say yes, and I'm not,
how would I get him to do it?
364
00:20:12,652 --> 00:20:15,697
You're good at getting guys
to sleep with you, no?
365
00:20:20,159 --> 00:20:22,870
No. Toss those.
366
00:20:23,037 --> 00:20:26,999
Here, I'll take that.
Used it on her corn rows.
367
00:20:27,166 --> 00:20:30,795
(CHUCKLES) You called her "corn hoes"
when she and Mercy started dating.
368
00:20:30,962 --> 00:20:33,757
Yes, well,
that was before she was dead.
369
00:20:33,839 --> 00:20:35,879
Besides, I told Mercy
I'd keep a few things for her.
370
00:20:35,925 --> 00:20:37,176
You talked to Mercy?
371
00:20:37,385 --> 00:20:39,638
Yeah. I mean,
somebody had to talk to her.
372
00:20:39,721 --> 00:20:41,013
That was good of you, Boo.
373
00:20:41,139 --> 00:20:42,140
Yeah.
374
00:20:42,265 --> 00:20:45,101
Remember when Danita tried
to do Trish's corn rows?
375
00:20:45,184 --> 00:20:46,478
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
376
00:20:46,603 --> 00:20:48,480
Even Black Cindy couldn't
fix that shit. Yeah.
377
00:20:48,647 --> 00:20:51,023
Poor kid. She walked
around looking like
378
00:20:51,149 --> 00:20:53,568
Ursula from
The Little Mermaid for weeks.
379
00:20:59,741 --> 00:21:00,992
You eat.
380
00:21:01,701 --> 00:21:02,868
Thank you.
381
00:21:03,578 --> 00:21:04,663
BIG BOO: Fucking Chang.
382
00:21:04,829 --> 00:21:05,950
Who would've thought it, huh?
383
00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:07,332
Yeah.
384
00:21:07,915 --> 00:21:12,253
Hey!
Fresh out of the microwave.
385
00:21:13,630 --> 00:21:14,714
Gracias.
386
00:21:14,839 --> 00:21:15,923
Always thought
Tricia seemed nice.
387
00:21:16,007 --> 00:21:18,092
I mean,
I never talked to her much
388
00:21:18,217 --> 00:21:20,345
or nothing,
but she had a good vibe.
389
00:21:20,553 --> 00:21:21,554
MARITZA: Yeah.
390
00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:23,682
Sucks she hung herself.
391
00:21:25,141 --> 00:21:26,643
I'm really sorry for your loss.
392
00:21:26,726 --> 00:21:28,603
Yeah. Gracias.
393
00:21:29,854 --> 00:21:30,896
Let me smell.
394
00:21:31,022 --> 00:21:32,148
What do you think?
395
00:21:32,357 --> 00:21:33,858
What's up?
396
00:21:33,941 --> 00:21:36,528
Thought y'all could use some
comfort food. (CHUCKLES)
397
00:21:37,821 --> 00:21:39,113
Oh, shit!
398
00:21:41,366 --> 00:21:43,368
You know, I talked to her once
in the food line.
399
00:21:44,577 --> 00:21:45,870
Man, we both hated goulash day.
400
00:21:46,912 --> 00:21:49,415
She pulled off them
rows really nice, too.
401
00:21:49,582 --> 00:21:51,543
Yeah. Well, for a white girl.
402
00:21:51,626 --> 00:21:52,836
Thanks for all of this.
403
00:21:53,044 --> 00:21:54,379
Oh, also...
404
00:21:58,132 --> 00:21:59,133
This.
405
00:22:00,343 --> 00:22:01,803
(CHUCKLES) Holy shit.
406
00:22:01,886 --> 00:22:03,722
Looks like they forgot to turn
these potatoes into chips.
407
00:22:03,847 --> 00:22:05,557
Open that up, shawty.
408
00:22:05,724 --> 00:22:07,475
BLACK CINDY: Shit!
You gotta check this out.
409
00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:10,144
What? Let me see.
What? No fucking way.
410
00:22:11,354 --> 00:22:13,147
Fucking check it out!
411
00:22:13,981 --> 00:22:16,651
You gotta pour one
out for her, right?
412
00:22:19,445 --> 00:22:20,530
Thanks, son.
413
00:22:20,655 --> 00:22:21,740
Yeah.
414
00:22:24,242 --> 00:22:25,660
Looks like we throwing a party.
415
00:22:25,744 --> 00:22:26,994
Fucking-A.
416
00:22:27,495 --> 00:22:30,749
We were having our coffee,
reading the paper.
417
00:22:30,914 --> 00:22:37,255
And all of a sudden there are two huge
guys with badges at our front door.
418
00:22:37,589 --> 00:22:39,090
Piper wasn't even dressed.
419
00:22:39,173 --> 00:22:40,966
You never expect to
be in your pajamas
420
00:22:41,092 --> 00:22:42,926
the moment your
life changes forever.
421
00:22:43,052 --> 00:22:44,470
That's true, isn't it?
422
00:22:44,596 --> 00:22:47,181
At the very least you'd have
underwear on, hopefully.
423
00:22:47,265 --> 00:22:51,102
(CHUCKLES) And how did you feel
once you started to understand
424
00:22:51,185 --> 00:22:53,438
that she'd actually
committed the crime?
425
00:22:53,563 --> 00:22:55,815
That your fiancee was
an indicted criminal?
426
00:22:55,939 --> 00:22:59,110
I was blindsided,
that's for sure.
427
00:22:59,444 --> 00:23:04,198
But it's like anything, eventually
it starts to feel normal.
428
00:23:05,867 --> 00:23:10,455
You figure out the right words to
say to other people. You adjust.
429
00:23:11,955 --> 00:23:15,167
I have to assume that
Piper is much more fortunate
430
00:23:15,293 --> 00:23:17,044
than a lot of
the women in there with her.
431
00:23:17,169 --> 00:23:21,633
You're able to drive up to see
her, you have resources, family.
432
00:23:21,841 --> 00:23:26,471
Yeah. Yeah. We're very lucky.
I see her a lot.
433
00:23:26,638 --> 00:23:27,806
What are your visits like?
434
00:23:27,931 --> 00:23:32,976
Oh, you know. She catches me up
on all the latest prison gossip.
435
00:23:33,102 --> 00:23:34,854
Which is actually
highly entertaining.
436
00:23:34,978 --> 00:23:36,021
Really?
Yeah.
437
00:23:36,147 --> 00:23:39,191
Can you tell us some
of your favorite stories?
438
00:23:39,983 --> 00:23:43,446
Oh, man. Well, I think my
favorite is one of the first.
439
00:23:53,331 --> 00:23:54,332
Ow!
440
00:23:54,540 --> 00:23:56,334
Dandelion! You okay?
441
00:23:56,835 --> 00:24:00,003
No touching.
No touching, okay? I'm fine.
442
00:24:00,505 --> 00:24:02,340
I'm real sorry about that.
443
00:24:02,465 --> 00:24:06,803
There used to be a sign that
said, "Caution. Wet floor."
444
00:24:06,886 --> 00:24:08,805
Really told people
what was going on.
445
00:24:08,888 --> 00:24:09,889
(GROANING)
446
00:24:13,100 --> 00:24:15,561
Suzanne, do you think
you could help me up?
447
00:24:16,187 --> 00:24:17,480
It's okay.
448
00:24:17,563 --> 00:24:19,524
Okay. Man. Okay.
449
00:24:20,817 --> 00:24:22,902
Here we go. Okay.
(EXCLAIMS IN ALARM)
450
00:24:23,026 --> 00:24:24,737
Okay. Okay.
451
00:24:24,863 --> 00:24:27,907
This is my fault.
This is my fault.
452
00:24:28,449 --> 00:24:30,535
My fault. My fault.
453
00:24:30,660 --> 00:24:31,981
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Please, don't,
454
00:24:32,035 --> 00:24:33,329
please, please,
please, don't do that.
455
00:24:33,412 --> 00:24:35,456
Please... It's okay.
456
00:24:36,749 --> 00:24:37,792
Thanks.
457
00:24:37,917 --> 00:24:40,545
I'm gonna make sure
you get home okay.
458
00:24:41,546 --> 00:24:43,046
No weird stuff.
459
00:24:43,882 --> 00:24:45,216
Thanks.
460
00:24:50,680 --> 00:24:52,348
You know this doesn't mean
I'm your wife, right?
461
00:24:52,431 --> 00:24:53,432
(CHUCKLES)
462
00:24:54,225 --> 00:24:58,396
I'm in much more of a
loving-being-single phase, anyway.
463
00:24:58,479 --> 00:25:01,858
I don't wanna be tied down.
You feel me?
464
00:25:02,775 --> 00:25:04,109
Oh, I feel you.
465
00:25:11,367 --> 00:25:14,954
Thank you, Suzanne.
Thank you very much.
466
00:25:19,291 --> 00:25:20,292
Ah!
467
00:25:21,293 --> 00:25:23,337
Suzanne, would you
mind taking this pillow
468
00:25:23,462 --> 00:25:25,506
and putting it
underneath my knee?
469
00:25:27,759 --> 00:25:29,427
You're not gonna pee, are you?
470
00:25:29,594 --> 00:25:34,265
No. When I get angry sometimes
I can't control myself.
471
00:25:34,348 --> 00:25:39,311
That's why I go to Looney Jail sometimes.
Psych. But not like "psych!"
472
00:25:40,312 --> 00:25:42,440
I gotta work on self-control.
473
00:25:42,565 --> 00:25:44,400
I can come back up
here when I'm in control
474
00:25:44,483 --> 00:25:46,444
'cause Mommy and
Daddy and the lawyer
475
00:25:46,611 --> 00:25:48,571
have an agreement
with the warden.
476
00:25:48,696 --> 00:25:52,408
Yeah. I like it up here.
I just gotta use the signal.
477
00:25:52,784 --> 00:25:54,077
What's the signal?
478
00:25:56,495 --> 00:26:00,499
Yeah. Helps the guards
know it's cool.
479
00:26:00,625 --> 00:26:02,919
Otherwise, back down.
480
00:26:03,044 --> 00:26:04,754
Is Psych worse than the SHU?
481
00:26:05,128 --> 00:26:06,464
Way worse.
482
00:26:06,631 --> 00:26:07,715
Scary.
483
00:26:08,674 --> 00:26:11,719
It's bold. Cold. Old.
484
00:26:12,428 --> 00:26:16,599
It's real bad. I wouldn't
wish it on the worst gremlin.
485
00:26:17,391 --> 00:26:18,631
But they give
you a therapist...
486
00:26:18,684 --> 00:26:19,852
No.
487
00:26:19,978 --> 00:26:24,816
Nope. I mean, they give me
medication and make me calm.
488
00:26:24,899 --> 00:26:27,192
But that just makes me sleepy.
489
00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:30,279
Sometimes when I'm real upset,
they tie me down.
490
00:26:30,446 --> 00:26:32,824
Like a balloon.
So I don't fly away.
491
00:26:33,156 --> 00:26:34,617
That sounds horrible.
492
00:26:34,826 --> 00:26:37,286
Yeah. Nobody comes
back from Psych.
493
00:26:38,245 --> 00:26:39,580
Except me.
494
00:26:40,539 --> 00:26:45,003
Once you go to Psych,
you get lost in Psych.
495
00:26:45,461 --> 00:26:49,507
It's like that place with the three corners?
In the ocean?
496
00:26:49,674 --> 00:26:51,092
The Bermuda Triangle.
497
00:26:51,216 --> 00:26:54,095
We should play charades
sometime, Dandelion.
498
00:26:54,177 --> 00:26:59,308
We'd make great partners.
Not wives. Just partners.
499
00:27:02,478 --> 00:27:05,023
Oh, can I ask you
one more question?
500
00:27:05,648 --> 00:27:06,899
Yeah, of course.
501
00:27:08,151 --> 00:27:12,446
How come everyone
calls me Crazy Eyes?
502
00:27:40,183 --> 00:27:42,267
(GRUNTING IN FRUSTRATION)
503
00:27:42,810 --> 00:27:45,228
Oh! God, no!
504
00:27:45,479 --> 00:27:46,480
(SOBBING)
505
00:27:51,903 --> 00:27:54,864
Another five milligrams
of diazepam for Doggett.
506
00:27:54,947 --> 00:27:57,408
I don't need any more.
I don't need no...
507
00:27:57,575 --> 00:27:58,826
Hey!
508
00:28:01,579 --> 00:28:03,081
I'm not crazy.
509
00:28:03,372 --> 00:28:05,958
Jesus, where are
you when I need you?
510
00:28:08,794 --> 00:28:12,006
No! Please.
I'm not crazy, I swear.
511
00:28:12,173 --> 00:28:14,926
If you weren't crazy, you
wouldn't have to work so hard
512
00:28:15,051 --> 00:28:16,594
to convince
everyone you're sane.
513
00:28:25,561 --> 00:28:28,439
LORNA: To Tricia.
May she rest in peace.
514
00:28:37,448 --> 00:28:38,490
Hey, Boo!
Hey!
515
00:28:38,616 --> 00:28:39,575
Oh, fuck off!
516
00:28:39,658 --> 00:28:42,120
Got to pour one out
for our girl, huh?
517
00:28:42,327 --> 00:28:43,370
Shit.
518
00:28:44,163 --> 00:28:45,289
Take it, take it.
519
00:28:45,456 --> 00:28:48,167
I thought you said they
weren't doing rounds today.
520
00:28:48,626 --> 00:28:49,919
Oh, it's just you.
521
00:28:50,002 --> 00:28:51,045
Yeah.
522
00:28:51,129 --> 00:28:52,130
(ALL SIGH IN RELIEF)
523
00:28:53,297 --> 00:28:54,465
Girl, get your ass in here.
524
00:28:59,262 --> 00:29:01,222
So this is what you
guys decided to do
525
00:29:01,346 --> 00:29:03,307
instead of come
to my memorial? Huh?
526
00:29:03,390 --> 00:29:04,600
Get drunk?
527
00:29:04,683 --> 00:29:06,269
Which looks like more fun?
528
00:29:06,393 --> 00:29:07,937
Point, Nun.
529
00:29:08,020 --> 00:29:09,063
(CHUCKLES)
530
00:29:09,147 --> 00:29:10,314
No, I can't.
531
00:29:10,439 --> 00:29:12,316
Hey, hand it over.
532
00:29:19,323 --> 00:29:21,117
Used to be a lady
in here who made
533
00:29:21,242 --> 00:29:23,035
the best toilet
hooch you've ever had.
534
00:29:23,661 --> 00:29:24,996
Shame she got out.
535
00:29:27,206 --> 00:29:28,207
Mmm!
536
00:29:29,583 --> 00:29:31,585
Why is having a drink
so cathartic sometimes?
537
00:29:31,669 --> 00:29:34,338
Booze helps you process.
At least where I come from.
538
00:29:34,421 --> 00:29:36,381
My family just yelled at
each other when they drank
539
00:29:36,423 --> 00:29:38,176
and then pretended
like nothing happened.
540
00:29:38,425 --> 00:29:39,426
Ah.
541
00:29:39,510 --> 00:29:42,346
This explains the wide-eyed,
ice-princess uptight thing.
542
00:29:42,471 --> 00:29:44,015
I'm not uptight!
543
00:29:44,140 --> 00:29:45,474
(ALL LAUGHING)
544
00:29:45,891 --> 00:29:48,393
Really? Is that funny?
It's really that hilarious?
545
00:29:48,519 --> 00:29:49,687
No, it's fine.
546
00:30:02,992 --> 00:30:04,535
You're awfully quiet, Nichols.
547
00:30:05,286 --> 00:30:07,038
It's been a long day, you know?
548
00:30:07,538 --> 00:30:09,040
BIG BOO: Look at this shit.
549
00:30:09,165 --> 00:30:11,542
Still kept track of everything
she owed everybody.
550
00:30:14,170 --> 00:30:17,006
How's that for karma,
huh? Yoga?
551
00:30:17,089 --> 00:30:18,883
That girl, she was good.
552
00:30:19,383 --> 00:30:22,887
Better than any of us. Too fucking
good for this fucking place.
553
00:30:23,095 --> 00:30:25,806
Well, fuck that. We all are.
554
00:30:28,142 --> 00:30:29,310
To Trish.
555
00:30:29,434 --> 00:30:30,686
ALL: To Trish.
556
00:30:32,479 --> 00:30:36,150
Hey, come on, Benny.
Shoot one back with me, bud?
557
00:30:36,317 --> 00:30:37,597
Nah, it's all right.
I'm driving.
558
00:30:37,651 --> 00:30:39,362
Suit yourself.
559
00:30:49,163 --> 00:30:50,164
(EXCLAIMS QUIETLY)
560
00:30:56,754 --> 00:30:58,214
Hello, ladies.
561
00:30:58,839 --> 00:31:00,216
How are we doing this evening?
562
00:31:00,424 --> 00:31:01,800
Buy us a drink?
563
00:31:02,009 --> 00:31:03,386
Are you serious?
564
00:31:03,468 --> 00:31:06,513
That's the first thing you say
to me, buy us a fucking drink?
565
00:31:06,597 --> 00:31:09,433
You believe these
fucking sluts, Bennett?
566
00:31:09,558 --> 00:31:11,102
What the fuck is
wrong with you?
567
00:31:11,185 --> 00:31:12,603
I'm sorry.
We just had a long week,
568
00:31:12,770 --> 00:31:14,146
we're letting off
some steam here.
569
00:31:14,272 --> 00:31:15,356
He didn't mean it.
570
00:31:15,439 --> 00:31:17,400
Yeah,
'cause we work at the prison.
571
00:31:17,524 --> 00:31:19,693
No shit?
That's gotta be scary.
572
00:31:20,527 --> 00:31:24,115
A girl died yesterday.
Hung herself.
573
00:31:24,198 --> 00:31:28,619
Should've seen how her eyes fucking bulged
out of her head. (CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY)
574
00:31:29,078 --> 00:31:31,663
Like that actor, that...
575
00:31:31,789 --> 00:31:34,541
Oh, come on, (STAMMERS) the
one with the big eyes...
576
00:31:34,625 --> 00:31:38,296
Oh, come on! You know, the fucking...
The ugly one.
577
00:31:39,630 --> 00:31:42,466
All right. I think, maybe we
should get you home, man.
578
00:31:44,009 --> 00:31:45,010
Oh.
579
00:31:45,970 --> 00:31:48,555
You know what pisses me off, Benny?
(BURPS)
580
00:31:48,931 --> 00:31:51,016
These fucking
bitches look at me like I'm
581
00:31:51,142 --> 00:31:53,227
some goddamn piece
of meat, you know?
582
00:31:53,311 --> 00:31:55,313
Like a fucking sex toy.
583
00:31:55,438 --> 00:31:57,481
But I'm a human being, man.
584
00:31:57,606 --> 00:32:01,193
I'm a person, you know,
with feelings and emotions.
585
00:32:02,445 --> 00:32:05,323
Does anybody ever ask me
how my day is going?
586
00:32:06,490 --> 00:32:07,825
No.
587
00:32:08,659 --> 00:32:12,997
We practically live with these girls.
We know everything about them.
588
00:32:13,998 --> 00:32:18,043
Do they ever for a second think
about our life outside of work?
589
00:32:18,919 --> 00:32:21,964
It's like we cease to exist
outside of those fucking walls.
590
00:32:22,047 --> 00:32:23,924
What the fuck is that?
591
00:32:25,426 --> 00:32:30,014
I'm sitting here, right?
Yeah, I exist!
592
00:32:36,354 --> 00:32:40,107
They think I'm so tall,
my feelings don't get hurt.
593
00:32:41,942 --> 00:32:43,152
All right, yeah.
594
00:32:44,653 --> 00:32:48,532
You are tall, buddy.
Come on. I'll drive you home.
595
00:32:48,699 --> 00:32:50,201
All right.
596
00:32:50,868 --> 00:32:52,870
All right, all right.
597
00:33:05,174 --> 00:33:07,218
Still a lightweight, huh, kid?
598
00:33:07,385 --> 00:33:11,347
Hooch is a little stronger
than Pinot Grigio, you know?
599
00:33:13,849 --> 00:33:15,934
You're looking very nice today.
600
00:33:16,101 --> 00:33:17,728
Better than you, at least.
601
00:33:17,853 --> 00:33:19,730
Are you off to
see you-know-who?
602
00:33:19,938 --> 00:33:21,106
Perhaps.
603
00:33:21,273 --> 00:33:24,568
Well, don't forget Larry's
interview is at 11:00 a.m.
604
00:33:24,776 --> 00:33:26,529
I wouldn't miss it.
605
00:33:27,863 --> 00:33:30,491
ALEX: Well, you two are like
real butt buddies these days.
606
00:33:30,699 --> 00:33:33,660
What do you think about that thing
that Big Boo said last night?
607
00:33:33,785 --> 00:33:35,579
About Tricia's karma?
608
00:33:35,787 --> 00:33:38,290
I think that we were all drunk
and bullshitting.
609
00:33:38,499 --> 00:33:40,543
What if it's not bullshit?
610
00:33:41,877 --> 00:33:44,338
I don't think that Pennsatucky
deserves to be in Psych.
611
00:33:44,588 --> 00:33:48,259
Look, you're just hung over
and feeling emo, all right?
612
00:33:48,342 --> 00:33:50,886
She's exactly
where she belongs.
613
00:33:50,969 --> 00:33:52,596
We basically
performed a public service.
614
00:33:52,721 --> 00:33:54,306
It's pretty horrible, Alex.
615
00:33:54,598 --> 00:33:55,766
You thought it was hilarious.
616
00:33:55,891 --> 00:33:58,519
That was before I talked to Suzanne
about what psych was like.
617
00:33:58,602 --> 00:33:59,603
Who's Suzanne?
618
00:33:59,686 --> 00:34:00,687
Crazy Eyes.
619
00:34:00,771 --> 00:34:02,731
Are you cheating on me and
Larry with Crazy Eyes?
620
00:34:02,814 --> 00:34:04,534
'Cause there is not
room for the four of us.
621
00:34:04,608 --> 00:34:06,360
Shut up. This is not funny.
622
00:34:06,444 --> 00:34:10,072
She said that Psych
is even worse than the SHU.
623
00:34:10,155 --> 00:34:12,616
And I can't even begin...
I can't.
624
00:34:12,699 --> 00:34:14,060
You know,
you really shouldn't have
625
00:34:14,118 --> 00:34:15,558
started this whole
gaslighting thing.
626
00:34:15,578 --> 00:34:16,620
Whoa, what is with the blaming?
627
00:34:16,703 --> 00:34:18,539
You sent her
into that bathroom.
628
00:34:18,622 --> 00:34:20,832
Do not project your
conscience onto me.
629
00:34:20,958 --> 00:34:23,210
Especially before
I'm barely awake.
630
00:34:23,335 --> 00:34:26,838
You know, you're absolutely right.
You're absolutely right.
631
00:34:26,964 --> 00:34:28,299
I am gonna go to
Caputo's office
632
00:34:28,424 --> 00:34:29,758
and I'm gonna tell
him that it was my fault
633
00:34:29,841 --> 00:34:31,135
and that he should let her out.
634
00:34:31,260 --> 00:34:33,554
Okay, I get your point,
Pipes. I get it.
635
00:34:33,678 --> 00:34:36,014
You think that
it was wrong. Cool.
636
00:34:36,848 --> 00:34:40,144
I am so tired of running away
from my shit, Alex.
637
00:34:40,269 --> 00:34:42,438
You said it yesterday.
I compartmentalize
638
00:34:42,563 --> 00:34:44,731
everything to make
myself feel better.
639
00:34:45,316 --> 00:34:47,568
I mean, I'm having
an affair with you.
640
00:34:47,651 --> 00:34:50,821
And we did not play a prank
on Pennsatucky, we were mean.
641
00:34:50,904 --> 00:34:53,991
I cannot let her
stay in Psych. I can't.
642
00:34:54,116 --> 00:34:56,201
Okay,
I would like to stress that
643
00:34:56,327 --> 00:34:58,496
I think this is
truly fucking stupid.
644
00:34:58,829 --> 00:35:01,540
It was me that
started this whole thing.
645
00:35:01,665 --> 00:35:04,627
Then I'll take this
one for the both of us.
646
00:35:10,174 --> 00:35:12,510
PIPER: Are you off
the phone now?
647
00:35:13,135 --> 00:35:15,804
It wasn't in the bathroom,
either.
648
00:35:15,887 --> 00:35:18,641
Did you look at
all while I was out?
649
00:35:20,684 --> 00:35:22,769
Alex,
I understand you're upset,
650
00:35:22,853 --> 00:35:26,773
but could you at least acknowledge
I'm a person who is speaking?
651
00:35:27,899 --> 00:35:31,028
If I miss this
flight I'm screwed.
652
00:35:33,905 --> 00:35:37,951
Alex! Passport! Hello?
653
00:35:40,120 --> 00:35:41,539
My mom died.
654
00:35:46,502 --> 00:35:47,628
What?
655
00:35:51,173 --> 00:35:55,135
My aunt just called up. It
happened this morning, I guess.
656
00:35:57,012 --> 00:35:58,597
Oh, Alex.
657
00:36:00,265 --> 00:36:01,892
I'm so sorry.
658
00:36:03,101 --> 00:36:06,605
My first instinct was
to call her to talk about it.
659
00:36:11,694 --> 00:36:13,320
What happened?
660
00:36:13,737 --> 00:36:15,864
An aneurysm.
661
00:36:17,241 --> 00:36:21,078
I don't know. My aunt said so many
things I don't even remember now.
662
00:36:21,203 --> 00:36:22,746
What can I do?
663
00:36:23,372 --> 00:36:25,082
I don't know.
I mean, I need to fly home.
664
00:36:25,165 --> 00:36:26,750
I need to figure
out the funeral
665
00:36:26,875 --> 00:36:28,419
because there's no
one else to do it.
666
00:36:28,669 --> 00:36:29,753
Okay.
667
00:36:31,422 --> 00:36:35,509
Will you see if you could find us
two seats out on a flight today?
668
00:36:41,390 --> 00:36:43,267
Al, I can't go with you.
669
00:36:47,145 --> 00:36:48,313
What?
670
00:36:49,773 --> 00:36:52,651
I am so sorry about your mom.
671
00:36:55,946 --> 00:36:57,781
But this doesn't
change anything.
672
00:36:58,532 --> 00:37:00,409
You're still leaving?
673
00:37:01,410 --> 00:37:02,786
Right now?
674
00:37:04,788 --> 00:37:09,126
My mother just died.
I can't fucking believe you.
675
00:37:11,295 --> 00:37:13,464
I can't be your
girlfriend anymore.
676
00:37:13,547 --> 00:37:16,300
Yeah, and apparently
not even my friend.
677
00:37:19,428 --> 00:37:21,388
Top drawer,
underneath my T-shirts.
678
00:37:21,555 --> 00:37:22,847
Jesus, Alex!
679
00:37:25,267 --> 00:37:27,185
You fucking hid it?
680
00:37:33,400 --> 00:37:35,152
Please don't leave.
681
00:37:36,487 --> 00:37:37,738
Not now.
682
00:37:43,577 --> 00:37:44,578
(SIGHS)
683
00:37:48,039 --> 00:37:49,958
You shouldn't
really be out here.
684
00:37:50,041 --> 00:37:52,336
It's okay.
I wanted to see you.
685
00:37:53,003 --> 00:37:54,254
How are you feeling?
686
00:37:56,006 --> 00:37:59,343
(SIGHS) Okay. A little better. You
heard anything from the warden?
687
00:37:59,426 --> 00:38:01,762
No. I'm...
688
00:38:01,845 --> 00:38:03,221
To be honest,
I think I might have
689
00:38:03,347 --> 00:38:04,723
underestimated
how long it'll take.
690
00:38:04,848 --> 00:38:07,184
They said it could be weeks,
or maybe even months.
691
00:38:07,351 --> 00:38:09,144
We don't got much time.
I know.
692
00:38:09,227 --> 00:38:11,772
Daya, look, I'm really starting
to freak out a little.
693
00:38:11,855 --> 00:38:13,482
I mean, I'm trying to be cool.
694
00:38:13,565 --> 00:38:15,108
But, you know,
I could be arrested for this.
695
00:38:15,192 --> 00:38:16,985
It's not just my job.
It's my whole life, you know?
696
00:38:17,068 --> 00:38:18,987
And I know it's yours,
too, of course.
697
00:38:19,112 --> 00:38:21,031
I don't know how
we're gonna fix this...
698
00:38:24,535 --> 00:38:27,329
It'll be okay.
I know it will.
699
00:38:28,079 --> 00:38:30,499
We'll figure
something out, okay?
700
00:38:31,208 --> 00:38:32,501
Okay.
701
00:38:34,837 --> 00:38:37,047
You know,
would you have liked me
702
00:38:37,214 --> 00:38:39,466
if we would have met
out in the real world?
703
00:38:39,633 --> 00:38:40,884
Yeah.
704
00:38:41,510 --> 00:38:43,261
For real?
Of course.
705
00:38:44,262 --> 00:38:47,932
I would've bought you a drink.
Chatted you up.
706
00:38:48,392 --> 00:38:50,894
I don't know if we would
have been in the same club.
707
00:38:51,061 --> 00:38:52,771
Who knows?
You know, I ended up
708
00:38:52,896 --> 00:38:54,616
in a skeezy dive bar
with Mendez last night.
709
00:38:54,732 --> 00:38:58,902
Never thought I'd be in a place like that.
Oh, man, he was so drunk.
710
00:38:59,027 --> 00:39:00,070
Really?
711
00:39:00,237 --> 00:39:02,197
Wasted, Daya.
Oh, it was hilarious.
712
00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:03,741
These two nasty girls
started hitting on him,
713
00:39:03,907 --> 00:39:05,325
then he went on this whole rant
714
00:39:05,409 --> 00:39:06,910
about how women
treat him like meat
715
00:39:07,035 --> 00:39:08,704
and never ask him
how he's doing or anything.
716
00:39:08,787 --> 00:39:11,498
Who knew he was
such a delicate flower?
717
00:39:12,249 --> 00:39:14,209
I wish you could've seen it.
718
00:39:15,168 --> 00:39:16,712
Me, too.
719
00:39:38,442 --> 00:39:39,860
Mr. Caputo?
720
00:39:40,444 --> 00:39:42,446
What do you need, Chapman?
721
00:39:43,363 --> 00:39:45,574
I'd like to talk to you
about Tiffany Doggett.
722
00:39:46,742 --> 00:39:49,828
We took care of her. She
won't be a problem anymore.
723
00:39:50,328 --> 00:39:52,831
It wasn't her fault.
It was mine.
724
00:39:52,956 --> 00:39:56,460
And I would like to fill out a report.
Officially.
725
00:40:00,672 --> 00:40:01,715
Have a seat.
726
00:40:02,591 --> 00:40:03,592
(SIGHS)
727
00:40:17,355 --> 00:40:19,316
What the fuck are you doing?
728
00:40:19,399 --> 00:40:22,986
You are out of bounds. Get back
behind the line immediately, inmate.
729
00:40:23,111 --> 00:40:28,116
Sorry, I was just... I wanted to talk.
Is that okay?
730
00:40:28,992 --> 00:40:31,077
You must get bored in here.
731
00:40:33,079 --> 00:40:35,123
It's not stimulating, no.
732
00:40:35,206 --> 00:40:37,542
You like other posts
more than the bubble?
733
00:40:38,502 --> 00:40:40,671
Cafeteria's my favorite.
734
00:40:40,838 --> 00:40:42,840
More to do, keeps you busy.
735
00:40:42,965 --> 00:40:44,675
Fucking hate that intake.
736
00:40:44,758 --> 00:40:48,846
The goddamn ID machine's
always broken. Why?
737
00:40:49,721 --> 00:40:52,307
No reason.
Just curious about your day.
738
00:40:54,768 --> 00:40:57,145
Well, it's
important to stay occupied.
739
00:40:57,270 --> 00:40:59,648
That's why I work on
these brain exercises.
740
00:40:59,731 --> 00:41:01,859
You know, a job like this,
you gotta stay sharp.
741
00:41:01,942 --> 00:41:03,902
You gotta stay on
top of your game.
742
00:41:04,027 --> 00:41:07,197
You gotta stay a step ahead.
Quick like a snake.
743
00:41:10,325 --> 00:41:13,662
In case any crossword
criminals jump out at you?
744
00:41:14,454 --> 00:41:15,455
(CHUCKLES)
745
00:41:17,248 --> 00:41:22,587
You know, the other day I just
read this article about Sudoku.
746
00:41:23,254 --> 00:41:26,591
Turns out, the Japanese
did not invent it.
747
00:41:26,717 --> 00:41:30,136
Some American,
some guy came up with it,
748
00:41:30,261 --> 00:41:33,724
originally called
it Numbers Place.
749
00:41:34,516 --> 00:41:37,101
Now I don't know what
Sudoku means in Japanese,
750
00:41:37,227 --> 00:41:41,105
but I find it a little bit odd that
it came out right before 9/11.
751
00:41:53,535 --> 00:41:54,745
You are glowing.
752
00:41:54,995 --> 00:41:56,204
Am I?
753
00:42:01,251 --> 00:42:07,591
Jean, I don't want to jinx it, but I
think I'll hear about my appeal soon.
754
00:42:09,342 --> 00:42:11,344
Where would you like to go?
755
00:42:11,511 --> 00:42:13,263
What do you mean?
756
00:42:13,388 --> 00:42:16,600
On your first night out.
Where should we go?
757
00:42:16,725 --> 00:42:18,769
Anywhere you like.
758
00:42:19,603 --> 00:42:24,441
You must believe, lanmou mwen.
Believe and it will happen.
759
00:42:27,027 --> 00:42:30,030
You remember that
little Italian place down
760
00:42:30,154 --> 00:42:33,116
in the basement,
on Montague Street?
761
00:42:33,241 --> 00:42:34,785
The one with the fresh bread.
762
00:42:34,910 --> 00:42:36,327
Of course I do.
763
00:42:36,536 --> 00:42:38,371
I'd like to go there.
764
00:42:38,705 --> 00:42:40,164
And after?
765
00:42:40,749 --> 00:42:43,293
Anywhere, with you.
766
00:42:48,799 --> 00:42:50,216
MAN ON PA:
Attention all officers,
767
00:42:50,341 --> 00:42:51,760
intake for new
prisoners will be in one hour.
768
00:42:51,843 --> 00:42:54,888
Come in. She's family.
769
00:43:00,102 --> 00:43:02,104
I'll do it.
I got it all set up.
770
00:43:02,228 --> 00:43:05,148
You're sure? Did you tell
him you wanted drugs?
771
00:43:05,315 --> 00:43:07,776
No, I just talked to him.
772
00:43:08,068 --> 00:43:10,487
Simple.
It's clean. I like it.
773
00:43:11,154 --> 00:43:15,241
I didn't want to be this graphic
in front of your mother.
774
00:43:16,284 --> 00:43:17,869
But you know he needs to...
775
00:43:19,079 --> 00:43:20,330
Cum inside of you.
776
00:43:20,497 --> 00:43:21,832
Or on you.
777
00:43:22,206 --> 00:43:25,585
Right. Okay, if... At the very least,
you got to Lewinsky this shit.
778
00:43:25,669 --> 00:43:27,378
Get some splooge
on your uniform.
779
00:43:27,504 --> 00:43:29,255
Anything that'll
be concrete proof.
780
00:43:31,174 --> 00:43:34,011
After you're done, you go
straight to the medic's office.
781
00:43:34,094 --> 00:43:37,597
Tell him you've been raped. Have
him do an exam immediately.
782
00:43:37,681 --> 00:43:39,141
Don't stop to pee.
783
00:43:39,223 --> 00:43:41,893
Don't wash anything.
Understand?
784
00:43:44,938 --> 00:43:46,397
Go get 'em, tiger.
785
00:43:59,369 --> 00:44:01,538
Well, you're not in the SHU.
Mmm-mmm.
786
00:44:01,621 --> 00:44:05,375
Janitorial duty.
Night shift. Two weeks.
787
00:44:06,043 --> 00:44:07,335
You're lucky.
788
00:44:07,878 --> 00:44:09,963
You better be
careful for a while.
789
00:44:13,175 --> 00:44:14,551
No, no, no, no, no.
790
00:44:14,634 --> 00:44:16,553
I think that looks like the exact
opposite of being careful.
791
00:44:16,678 --> 00:44:18,096
Regnery is on duty again.
792
00:44:19,056 --> 00:44:20,891
Come be my little spoon.
793
00:44:28,023 --> 00:44:29,440
Gosh!
794
00:44:31,484 --> 00:44:33,820
Ow. How do you
sleep on this thing?
795
00:44:34,362 --> 00:44:35,655
Not well.
796
00:44:36,447 --> 00:44:38,033
(MENDEZ ANNOUNCING ON PA)
797
00:44:39,951 --> 00:44:41,619
Hey, I am proud of you.
798
00:44:43,663 --> 00:44:45,248
Yeah?
Yeah.
799
00:44:48,585 --> 00:44:53,924
That was really brave. I mean,
it was dumb, but brave.
800
00:44:57,761 --> 00:44:58,929
You know,
801
00:45:00,138 --> 00:45:05,060
I don't think that anyone has ever
used that word to describe me
802
00:45:05,143 --> 00:45:06,937
in the history of the universe.
803
00:45:10,272 --> 00:45:12,859
I'm glad we have
each other in here, kid.
804
00:45:13,235 --> 00:45:14,527
Yeah, me, too.
805
00:45:15,570 --> 00:45:20,909
I mean, I'd rather be on a beach in
Tahiti, but this is a close second.
806
00:45:24,662 --> 00:45:28,125
Why do you always
feel so inevitable to me?
807
00:45:31,086 --> 00:45:32,462
I heart you.
808
00:45:32,587 --> 00:45:33,755
You heart me?
809
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:35,048
(CHUCKLES) Yeah.
810
00:45:35,215 --> 00:45:38,300
What is that? Is that like
"I love you" for pussies?
811
00:45:38,468 --> 00:45:40,095
Say "pussy" again.
812
00:45:41,054 --> 00:45:42,055
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
813
00:46:04,995 --> 00:46:06,663
I heart you, too.
814
00:46:07,329 --> 00:46:10,625
NICKY: Hey, not-lesbians.
It's 11:00.
815
00:46:10,750 --> 00:46:12,502
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit.
816
00:46:12,627 --> 00:46:14,171
Do you have a radio?
Yeah.
817
00:46:16,714 --> 00:46:18,842
Are you gonna be okay to
listen to this thing together?
818
00:46:19,009 --> 00:46:21,511
I mean, I don't think
it's against the rules.
819
00:46:23,013 --> 00:46:24,848
Okay.
Okay. Here.
820
00:46:28,476 --> 00:46:30,436
MAURY KIND: Chances are,
most of you have been there.
821
00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:33,355
It starts with
two people in love.
822
00:46:33,439 --> 00:46:36,734
You make a lot of promises, tell each
other you're different from the rest,
823
00:46:36,860 --> 00:46:38,153
the exception.
824
00:46:39,612 --> 00:46:41,739
For a month or two,
the long, meandering
825
00:46:41,865 --> 00:46:44,034
conversations feel
foreign and exciting.
826
00:46:44,117 --> 00:46:46,870
A chance to get to know one
another in a more intimate level.
827
00:46:47,871 --> 00:46:52,167
And then, slowly, so slowly
you might not even notice,
828
00:46:52,250 --> 00:46:57,297
conversations are replaced by missed
calls and resentful voicemails.
829
00:46:57,839 --> 00:46:59,090
And then finally,
830
00:46:59,841 --> 00:47:01,676
the day comes when
the two of you admit
831
00:47:01,801 --> 00:47:03,678
that you aren't,
in fact, the exception.
832
00:47:06,681 --> 00:47:09,475
That being far away from
the person you love most
833
00:47:09,642 --> 00:47:14,272
is difficult on the good days
and impossible on the bad ones.
834
00:47:18,568 --> 00:47:21,738
Today, we're exploring
long-distance relationships
835
00:47:22,655 --> 00:47:24,241
and talking with
a few New Yorkers
836
00:47:24,324 --> 00:47:27,451
who are currently navigating
these treacherous waters.
837
00:47:28,245 --> 00:47:31,455
I'm Maury Kind,
encouraging you to take
838
00:47:31,581 --> 00:47:34,792
a break from life
and join us, won't you?
839
00:47:36,253 --> 00:47:38,755
Can you tell us some
of your favorite stories?
840
00:47:38,838 --> 00:47:39,881
Oh, man.
841
00:47:41,049 --> 00:47:44,969
Well, I think my
favorite is one of the first.
842
00:47:46,304 --> 00:47:50,392
This insane girl,
like, actually insane,
843
00:47:50,474 --> 00:47:54,396
the kind of person who belongs in a
psychiatric hospital not a prison,
844
00:47:54,520 --> 00:47:56,356
but that's a whole
other discussion.
845
00:47:56,438 --> 00:48:00,484
She decides that Piper
is going to be her wife.
846
00:48:01,443 --> 00:48:06,032
She followed her around for days.
Wrote her this horrible poem.
847
00:48:06,866 --> 00:48:10,578
MAURY KIND: Do things like that concern
you in terms of Piper's safety?
848
00:48:10,787 --> 00:48:14,498
LARRY: Of course.
Yeah, of course. Absolutely.
849
00:48:15,499 --> 00:48:17,419
I know she can handle herself,
850
00:48:18,086 --> 00:48:19,879
but when you're dealing
with unstable women,
851
00:48:19,963 --> 00:48:22,464
you have no idea what they're
actually capable of.
852
00:48:22,632 --> 00:48:28,138
I mean, when your fiancee says
that she sleeps with one eye open
853
00:48:28,221 --> 00:48:30,723
because her
roommate is rumored to be
854
00:48:30,848 --> 00:48:33,310
a murderer and might
shiv her in her sleep,
855
00:48:33,435 --> 00:48:35,645
it's impossible
not to be scared.
856
00:48:35,728 --> 00:48:39,649
And I don't want to imply that
they're all crazy and dangerous.
857
00:48:40,984 --> 00:48:44,695
There's one girl who
should've been a track star.
858
00:48:44,821 --> 00:48:49,159
She was actually gonna start training
again while she was in there,
859
00:48:49,242 --> 00:48:53,121
but they shut the track down
because of budget cuts.
860
00:48:53,204 --> 00:48:56,124
There's the girl who has been
planning her wedding for months,
861
00:48:56,207 --> 00:48:58,084
just like everything is normal.
862
00:48:58,168 --> 00:49:01,838
Oh, but she is also sleeping
with the hot, lesbian junkie.
863
00:49:01,963 --> 00:49:04,090
How's that for a prison cliche?
864
00:49:04,924 --> 00:49:08,428
I mean, the cast of
characters goes on and on.
865
00:49:08,510 --> 00:49:13,433
There is the Russian woman who runs
the kitchen, totally terrifying,
866
00:49:13,515 --> 00:49:18,313
but she takes so much pride
in feeding everyone.
867
00:49:18,771 --> 00:49:21,523
You really have
to admire the way
868
00:49:21,649 --> 00:49:24,402
these women find
meaning in their days.
869
00:49:24,735 --> 00:49:27,364
How they take
care of each other.
870
00:49:30,532 --> 00:49:33,203
KIND: I'd like to
talk about the idea
871
00:49:33,328 --> 00:49:35,955
of female prison tropes,
if we could.
872
00:49:37,165 --> 00:49:40,210
It certainly seems
that sexual abuse
873
00:49:40,335 --> 00:49:43,380
and rape are very real threats.
874
00:49:44,047 --> 00:49:47,800
And then, of course,
there's the consensual sex.
875
00:49:47,884 --> 00:49:51,179
Did you and Piper make any
agreements before she left?
876
00:49:51,846 --> 00:49:52,847
Agreements?
877
00:49:52,930 --> 00:49:57,519
Well, pardon the pun, were any "get
out of jail free" cards handed out?
878
00:49:59,687 --> 00:50:03,066
LARRY: No. I'm very
committed to the relationship.
879
00:50:03,233 --> 00:50:04,566
How about for her?
880
00:50:09,989 --> 00:50:11,408
No.
881
00:50:12,742 --> 00:50:17,579
No, we never
discussed any agreements.
882
00:50:17,705 --> 00:50:21,000
Which was probably naive of us.
883
00:50:22,043 --> 00:50:24,754
You know,
it's funny, whenever we
884
00:50:24,921 --> 00:50:27,673
talked about
cheating in an abstract way,
885
00:50:28,716 --> 00:50:31,052
I always said I wouldn't
care if she had sex
886
00:50:31,177 --> 00:50:33,555
with someone else,
if it's just sex.
887
00:50:33,846 --> 00:50:39,185
But suppose, theoretically,
888
00:50:39,936 --> 00:50:43,940
that someone she loved
was in there with her.
889
00:50:44,065 --> 00:50:46,317
Someone she had history with.
890
00:50:47,902 --> 00:50:53,116
Someone who could understand
her life in there
891
00:50:53,241 --> 00:50:56,953
in a way that I'll
never be able to.
892
00:50:57,787 --> 00:51:01,082
It would be
devastating to think that
893
00:51:01,165 --> 00:51:04,419
that person could give her
something that I can't.
894
00:51:06,670 --> 00:51:09,715
It would be way
worse than just sex.
895
00:51:11,509 --> 00:51:14,762
It would be...
896
00:51:15,972 --> 00:51:17,890
It would be a betrayal.
897
00:51:27,484 --> 00:51:28,776
He knows.
898
00:51:33,864 --> 00:51:36,117
It's not phone
hours yet, Chapman.
899
00:51:36,909 --> 00:51:38,495
This is an emergency.
900
00:51:38,620 --> 00:51:41,100
Go eat lunch. You can deal with
your emergency in a few minutes,
901
00:51:41,164 --> 00:51:42,999
just like everyone else.
902
00:51:45,876 --> 00:51:47,629
Nice radio play.
903
00:51:48,879 --> 00:51:50,256
Oh, my God.
904
00:52:13,363 --> 00:52:14,947
He used a condom.
905
00:52:15,072 --> 00:52:16,199
Do you have it?
906
00:52:16,366 --> 00:52:18,368
No. He took it with him.
907
00:52:18,535 --> 00:52:19,661
We went over this.
908
00:52:19,785 --> 00:52:20,870
I know, but...
909
00:52:21,037 --> 00:52:23,831
I couldn't do
anything about it. I...
910
00:52:24,374 --> 00:52:26,459
Well, you're just
gonna have to do it again.
911
00:52:27,918 --> 00:52:31,381
Better hope you were good
enough for him to want more.
912
00:53:34,360 --> 00:53:35,612
Oh, fuck!
913
00:53:46,330 --> 00:53:50,376
I am so, so, so sorry.
914
00:53:50,668 --> 00:53:53,003
I had no idea that
he was gonna say those things.
915
00:53:53,170 --> 00:53:55,047
Is that what you think of me?
916
00:54:11,355 --> 00:54:14,776
An inmate from Litchfield Federal
Prison is attempting to contact you.
917
00:54:14,858 --> 00:54:17,320
To accept the call,
please press one.
918
00:54:17,861 --> 00:54:19,739
(BEEPS)
LARRY: So what did you think?
919
00:54:22,450 --> 00:54:23,701
How did you know?
920
00:54:24,160 --> 00:54:25,827
Know what, Piper?
921
00:54:26,828 --> 00:54:28,414
PIPER: I know that you know.
922
00:54:29,165 --> 00:54:32,710
I want to hear you say it.
Tell me you had sex with her.
923
00:54:33,753 --> 00:54:35,004
Please don't do this.
924
00:54:35,254 --> 00:54:37,674
Are you still
having sex with her?
925
00:54:40,468 --> 00:54:41,552
Yes.
926
00:54:47,809 --> 00:54:52,980
Your counselor called me.
927
00:54:53,690 --> 00:54:57,901
Freely, Healy, told me he was
concerned about your behavior.
928
00:54:58,027 --> 00:55:00,363
He told me that you
had to spend some time
929
00:55:00,530 --> 00:55:02,906
in the SHU for
lesbian activity.
930
00:55:04,450 --> 00:55:08,329
So was this your revenge?
Trying to get me killed?
931
00:55:09,079 --> 00:55:12,249
Wait, wait, so, so, you're
the victim in all of this?
932
00:55:12,500 --> 00:55:13,710
They're just people, Larry.
933
00:55:13,835 --> 00:55:15,712
They're just women who are
trying to do their best.
934
00:55:15,795 --> 00:55:18,297
And you made them
sound like they were...
935
00:55:18,381 --> 00:55:19,382
Criminals?
936
00:55:20,257 --> 00:55:21,425
Jesus!
937
00:55:22,552 --> 00:55:24,094
Who are you?
938
00:55:24,261 --> 00:55:28,516
Who... I can't believe... You're
the one asking me that right now?
939
00:55:28,599 --> 00:55:30,226
I can't believe that...
No, actually,
940
00:55:30,351 --> 00:55:31,935
actually,
actually, of course, I can.
941
00:55:32,061 --> 00:55:34,896
I totally can,
because, because God forbid
942
00:55:35,064 --> 00:55:37,941
I would get to dictate
the conversation, ever!
943
00:55:38,401 --> 00:55:41,111
There hasn't been any
conversation to dictate, Larry.
944
00:55:41,237 --> 00:55:43,905
You haven't picked up the
phone in over a week!
945
00:55:45,408 --> 00:55:48,285
Do you have any idea what it
has been like in here for me?
946
00:55:48,411 --> 00:55:50,329
Do you have any idea
how lonely I've been?
947
00:55:50,413 --> 00:55:53,915
Lonely? Lonely, really?
You've been lonely, huh?
948
00:55:54,041 --> 00:55:55,877
That's... Okay,
that's interesting, because,
949
00:55:56,001 --> 00:55:57,837
you know,
I just assumed you were okay,
950
00:55:57,879 --> 00:55:59,463
because you have Alex now.
951
00:56:01,048 --> 00:56:02,425
Do you love her?
952
00:56:04,886 --> 00:56:08,806
No, that's...
It's difficult.
953
00:56:10,600 --> 00:56:12,017
Do you love her?
954
00:56:17,356 --> 00:56:18,482
Yes.
955
00:56:37,668 --> 00:56:38,960
She named you, you know?
956
00:56:41,839 --> 00:56:44,258
She's the whole fucking reason
you're in there.
957
00:56:45,134 --> 00:56:47,303
How does it feel
to be in love with
958
00:56:47,428 --> 00:56:49,639
the woman who ruined our lives?
959
00:56:51,181 --> 00:56:52,683
You lied to me?
960
00:56:53,768 --> 00:56:56,646
Guess that makes us
perfect for each other.
961
00:57:00,483 --> 00:57:02,610
I didn't mean for
any of this to happen.
962
00:57:05,321 --> 00:57:07,364
I think I need some time.
963
00:57:08,574 --> 00:57:09,951
What does that mean?
964
00:57:10,033 --> 00:57:12,161
I don't know.
I just... I need...
965
00:57:12,870 --> 00:57:18,153
I need some time, okay? I
need some time away from you.
966
00:57:18,960 --> 00:57:21,086
You have to let me fix this.
967
00:57:23,255 --> 00:57:25,215
(TEARFULLY)
I don't know if you can.
968
00:57:31,180 --> 00:57:32,181
(DIAL TONE DRONING)
969
00:57:36,930 --> 00:57:47,121
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com