1
00:00:08,975 --> 00:00:10,806
Ah, Hop Foo's, my favorite.
Ripped By mstoll
2
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:12,876
Don't mind if I brunch.
3
00:00:18,318 --> 00:00:21,082
- Are you eating take-out for breakfast?
- You're my girlfriend now.
4
00:00:21,287 --> 00:00:23,187
You're not supposed to judge
anything I do.
5
00:00:23,390 --> 00:00:25,620
- Say that again.
- You're my girlfriend now.
6
00:00:25,825 --> 00:00:26,814
[BOTH LAUGH]
7
00:00:27,027 --> 00:00:29,860
I like it. Even when you have
dumpling in your mouth.
8
00:00:30,063 --> 00:00:32,623
- Ha, ha.
- Sounds good. I have to go.
9
00:00:32,832 --> 00:00:35,198
- I have a big meeting with Principal Foster.
- I hate that guy.
10
00:00:35,402 --> 00:00:37,734
- He always says no to your ideas.
- No, no. Not this one.
11
00:00:37,937 --> 00:00:42,806
- This one is, uh, Ocean Conservation Day.
- Why do you do this to yourself, Jess?
12
00:00:43,009 --> 00:00:44,237
You're telling me to not try?
13
00:00:44,444 --> 00:00:46,571
I don't want you to be disappointed
when he says no.
14
00:00:46,780 --> 00:00:50,147
Maybe you should try to try a little less.
15
00:00:50,350 --> 00:00:53,012
- How am I supposed to try to not try?
- That's a catch-22.
16
00:00:54,821 --> 00:00:56,584
- Hey, Coach.
- I dropped this dumpling!
17
00:00:56,790 --> 00:00:59,850
- Is that his breakfast?
- Yeah. Isn't it cute?
18
00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:02,255
- He's not even ashamed of it.
- Oh.
19
00:01:02,462 --> 00:01:04,987
I got it. It almost got away from... Agh!
20
00:01:05,799 --> 00:01:07,232
[SINGING]
Who's that girl?
21
00:01:07,434 --> 00:01:09,595
CHORUS: Who's that girl?
- It's Jess
22
00:01:10,470 --> 00:01:13,166
We have the chance to do something
really great.
23
00:01:13,373 --> 00:01:17,241
Everything's been donated.
All we need are transportation costs.
24
00:01:17,444 --> 00:01:21,244
Come on! That's only the most
expensive part of doing anything!
25
00:01:21,448 --> 00:01:24,884
You...! I'm sorry, that was rude.
26
00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:28,243
I slept very badly last night.
27
00:01:28,655 --> 00:01:31,954
Had a chai tea very late.
Had friends in from Montreal.
28
00:01:32,158 --> 00:01:36,219
Some of these kids have lived in L.A. Their
entire lives and have never seen the ocean.
29
00:01:36,429 --> 00:01:39,694
I asked them to draw
what they thought the ocean looked like.
30
00:01:39,899 --> 00:01:41,958
I got a lot of stuff like this.
31
00:01:42,168 --> 00:01:45,103
- Is that a bagel with wings?
- Yes, sir, it is.
32
00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:47,967
- Extraordinary.
- I'm not taking no for an answer.
33
00:01:48,174 --> 00:01:50,802
You're gonna have to,
because that's just the way it is.
34
00:01:51,010 --> 00:01:56,471
Mm. A shark with legs?
That's not even anatomically close to correct.
35
00:01:57,851 --> 00:01:59,819
That's just a square though.
36
00:02:00,186 --> 00:02:03,713
Have them start over. That's just terrible.
37
00:02:06,092 --> 00:02:09,721
Nick, I want to talk to you
about your fitness level.
38
00:02:09,929 --> 00:02:11,897
- Of what? My body?
- When's the last time you worked out?
39
00:02:12,098 --> 00:02:13,622
I'll tell you when it was.
40
00:02:13,833 --> 00:02:16,666
The time that he battled
his daddy's other dumb sperm...
41
00:02:16,903 --> 00:02:20,066
...in order to make his way
to his momma's dumb-ass egg.
42
00:02:20,273 --> 00:02:22,298
- Burns are getting better.
- Just really long.
43
00:02:22,509 --> 00:02:24,670
- Okay.
- Look, I don't need to work out.
44
00:02:24,878 --> 00:02:26,971
I'm old-fashioned
Coney Island fat-strong.
45
00:02:27,180 --> 00:02:30,775
Nicholas, Chinese food for breakfast.
See you're still a health nut.
46
00:02:30,984 --> 00:02:33,646
- Aren't you supposed to be at work?
- Rocking a PD. Personal day.
47
00:02:33,853 --> 00:02:35,787
Last day of the move.
48
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,685
Coach, I see you've wasted no time
moving into my room.
49
00:02:38,892 --> 00:02:42,828
Anyway, I just came over to,
uh, drop off my old key.
50
00:02:44,130 --> 00:02:45,529
Wow, so this is like a moment.
51
00:02:45,732 --> 00:02:47,757
Looking to get some much-needed space.
52
00:02:47,967 --> 00:02:49,958
- You're right across the hall.
- It's true.
53
00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:53,765
Everywhere you go, there you are.
54
00:02:53,973 --> 00:02:55,838
- What?
COACH: What?
55
00:02:56,042 --> 00:02:58,533
- His jeans are so small.
NICK: Looks like a little puppet.
56
00:02:58,745 --> 00:03:00,474
Like something
some Italian whittled.
57
00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:02,773
- Just let me train you.
- You should do it.
58
00:03:02,982 --> 00:03:06,850
I would love for Coach to train me,
but I pushed it too hard at the court.
59
00:03:07,053 --> 00:03:09,112
Went in for a dunk,
landed sort of funny.
60
00:03:10,256 --> 00:03:12,690
- Aah!
- Typical Winston.
61
00:03:12,892 --> 00:03:13,950
[BOTH LAUGHING]
62
00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:15,559
- True.
- What's that supposed to mean?
63
00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:17,161
You're always too injured to play.
64
00:03:17,363 --> 00:03:19,558
Remember when you sat out of a game
because you were sad?
65
00:03:19,766 --> 00:03:21,028
I was also cold.
66
00:03:22,835 --> 00:03:23,995
Nick, let's do this.
67
00:03:25,905 --> 00:03:27,964
Look at me.
You're in a new relationship.
68
00:03:28,174 --> 00:03:30,142
You're at risk for getting the boyfriend 15.
69
00:03:30,343 --> 00:03:31,810
- That's not a thing.
- It is.
70
00:03:32,011 --> 00:03:34,138
Jess is into this.
71
00:03:34,347 --> 00:03:36,542
I've seen this happen a million times.
72
00:03:36,749 --> 00:03:39,183
Boyfriend 15
quickly turns into the boyfriend 20.
73
00:03:39,385 --> 00:03:42,149
Next thing you know,
you're a fat dude on a little bike...
74
00:03:42,355 --> 00:03:44,983
...with a cowboy hat on,
talking about, "My ass hurts."
75
00:03:45,191 --> 00:03:47,591
- I don't wanna be that.
- I don't want you to be that.
76
00:03:47,794 --> 00:03:49,625
I'd be riding around in circles
or going places?
77
00:03:49,829 --> 00:03:52,059
Circles, dude.
Fat-guy rash on your arm.
78
00:03:52,265 --> 00:03:55,530
Schmidt's tried to get me to work out
for years. It didn't take.
79
00:03:55,735 --> 00:03:58,397
Also, and it's not an excuse,
I have a very bad back.
80
00:03:58,605 --> 00:03:59,663
- Bad back?
- Yeah.
81
00:03:59,872 --> 00:04:02,670
You gave me a piggyback ride
two days ago, giggled the whole time.
82
00:04:02,875 --> 00:04:05,241
- Heh, it was awesome.
- It was also really funny.
83
00:04:05,445 --> 00:04:06,844
We took the stairs, dude.
84
00:04:07,046 --> 00:04:08,536
- Because I was excited.
- Nick...
85
00:04:08,748 --> 00:04:11,239
...either take this dumpling
and be a dumpling guy...
86
00:04:11,451 --> 00:04:13,885
...or you train with me
and be a doing guy.
87
00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:16,248
It's hard.
Been a dumpling guy my whole life.
88
00:04:16,456 --> 00:04:19,118
One day, that's all I need.
I will change your life.
89
00:04:20,159 --> 00:04:21,717
You'll be able to see your abs.
90
00:04:23,730 --> 00:04:26,130
I thought God just didn't give me those.
91
00:04:26,332 --> 00:04:28,596
- Come on.
- Let's do it.
92
00:04:28,801 --> 00:04:30,701
- My man!
- I'm in! I'm gonna warn you.
93
00:04:30,903 --> 00:04:32,268
Working out is not my thing.
94
00:04:32,472 --> 00:04:34,201
I'm not worried, man. I do not fail.
95
00:04:34,407 --> 00:04:37,376
- You know what? I'm in too.
- You're injured, you shouldn't...
96
00:04:37,577 --> 00:04:40,444
What? Come on, Winnie the Bish
play through the pain, baby.
97
00:04:40,647 --> 00:04:42,376
Let's warm up with some jumping jacks.
98
00:04:42,582 --> 00:04:44,174
Agh!
99
00:04:49,656 --> 00:04:50,714
I'm just gonna... Um...
100
00:04:54,927 --> 00:04:57,725
Miss Day!
Check out my cool beach hat.
101
00:04:57,930 --> 00:05:01,127
Unfortunately, um, I have some bad news.
102
00:05:01,334 --> 00:05:03,495
We're not gonna get to go
on that field trip.
103
00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:07,771
But you said anything is possible,
Miss Day.
104
00:05:09,609 --> 00:05:12,077
You just keep wearing that hat, Crystal...
105
00:05:12,278 --> 00:05:15,975
...because as long as hot dogs are hats...
106
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:18,742
...anything is possible.
107
00:05:19,218 --> 00:05:22,016
You could be the first little girl in space.
108
00:05:22,221 --> 00:05:26,749
You just ride that hot dog hat
all the way to the moon, girl.
109
00:05:26,959 --> 00:05:30,520
Oh, Crystal,
you're not legally allowed to touch me.
110
00:05:30,730 --> 00:05:31,924
But thank you.
111
00:05:38,971 --> 00:05:41,804
- Hey! Guess who got a trainer.
- So many menus.
112
00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:43,669
I'm gonna look like Barry Bonds.
113
00:05:43,876 --> 00:05:46,106
- Seriously, what the hell?
- Hey.
114
00:05:46,312 --> 00:05:47,301
[SCOFFS]
115
00:05:47,513 --> 00:05:50,311
- It didn't go well with Foster.
- It did not go well.
116
00:05:50,516 --> 00:05:53,952
- I hate seeing you hurt.
- Are you serious? More menus?
117
00:05:54,153 --> 00:05:56,644
This is like...
Why do we need more menus?
118
00:05:56,856 --> 00:05:59,620
- Don't we have enough menus?
- You're saying "menus" a lot.
119
00:05:59,826 --> 00:06:01,225
This an eco-disaster.
120
00:06:01,427 --> 00:06:03,895
Conservation deserves a win today.
121
00:06:04,097 --> 00:06:05,826
Hop Foo's has killed its last tree.
122
00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:08,660
This feels like
a something-else-is-going-on type thing.
123
00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:10,859
You okay to drive? You got crazy-eye.
124
00:06:14,841 --> 00:06:16,809
Uh, welcome to Hop Foo's.
Can I help you?
125
00:06:17,009 --> 00:06:20,638
This morning, there were nine menus,
just in my apartment.
126
00:06:20,847 --> 00:06:23,680
I also hate those menus.
They're so bad for the environment.
127
00:06:24,917 --> 00:06:27,317
It's wasteful, it's an eco-disaster...
128
00:06:27,520 --> 00:06:29,147
I'll talk to my boss,
see if we can change that.
129
00:06:29,455 --> 00:06:32,982
Yeah, great. You do that.
I'm gonna follow up with you on that.
130
00:06:33,192 --> 00:06:36,389
I compost-recycle,
but I don't feel like it's enough. Thank you.
131
00:06:36,596 --> 00:06:42,057
- Thank you so much for stepping up.
- That's who I am. That's just, you know...
132
00:06:42,268 --> 00:06:44,429
- My name's Brian.
- Jess. Jessica. Jess.
133
00:06:44,637 --> 00:06:47,731
It's really refreshing
to meet someone who actually cares.
134
00:06:47,940 --> 00:06:49,908
Well, it helps that you're gorgeous.
135
00:06:50,109 --> 00:06:51,235
[LAUGHS]
136
00:06:51,444 --> 00:06:53,503
Blegh! Ha-ha-ha. Burr!
137
00:06:53,713 --> 00:06:57,205
No, that's crazy. That ain't real. Ha, ha.
138
00:06:57,417 --> 00:07:01,376
That's dumb. That's straight dumb.
You're dumb. You're nice.
139
00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:04,112
You excited for the holidays? I am.
140
00:07:04,323 --> 00:07:05,915
Anyway...
141
00:07:06,125 --> 00:07:08,559
- My system is built to be easy.
- Okay.
142
00:07:08,761 --> 00:07:10,752
- As easy as peanuts.
- "Easy as peanuts"?
143
00:07:10,963 --> 00:07:12,726
That's not an expression.
No one says that.
144
00:07:12,932 --> 00:07:17,596
Peanuts is an acronym. Peanuts stands for:
Physical. Education. Activity. Nuts.
145
00:07:18,838 --> 00:07:21,466
- Like, go nuts, have fun.
- You gotta use every letter.
146
00:07:21,674 --> 00:07:24,609
- I'm aware of that, but it still works.
- Yeah! Yo.
147
00:07:24,811 --> 00:07:27,211
What's going on, guys? Heh, let's do this.
148
00:07:27,413 --> 00:07:30,405
No injury's gonna hold
old Winnie the Bish down.
149
00:07:30,616 --> 00:07:32,914
I'm a warrior. Nick knows.
150
00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:34,484
Burpees? All right, cool.
151
00:07:34,687 --> 00:07:35,813
[GROANING]
152
00:07:36,022 --> 00:07:38,081
- Injury's gonna get worse.
WINSTON: I'm not a quitter.
153
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:39,280
[PHONE RINGS]
154
00:07:39,492 --> 00:07:41,153
What's going on? Everything okay?
155
00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:43,658
Did I leave my Oakland Raiders
yarmulke over there?
156
00:07:43,863 --> 00:07:45,956
Don't know,
Coach and I are working out.
157
00:07:47,233 --> 00:07:49,326
Heh, I've been trying to get you
to work out for years.
158
00:07:49,535 --> 00:07:52,629
- Just come over, man.
- I'm enjoying my space.
159
00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:55,103
But maybe you should just
put me on speaker.
160
00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:58,744
- Okay, you're on.
- Cool. Set the scene. What's the vibe?
161
00:07:58,945 --> 00:08:01,004
- Nick's in jeans.
- Nixon jeans?
162
00:08:01,247 --> 00:08:04,239
What the hell are Nixon jeans?
They sound really cool.
163
00:08:05,685 --> 00:08:07,983
Hey. I solved the menu thing.
164
00:08:08,187 --> 00:08:11,987
I just went down there and I took action.
Boom-yah. I made a change.
165
00:08:12,191 --> 00:08:15,285
Now that I can do that,
I feel like I can figure out the field trip.
166
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:17,429
- Double boom-yah.
- Ha, ha.
167
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:25,437
There's still things we need to figure out,
just gotta get the message across.
168
00:08:26,405 --> 00:08:29,431
Hey. Hey.
You don't need to leave these anymore.
169
00:08:29,642 --> 00:08:31,610
No. Hey, hey. Hey!
170
00:08:31,811 --> 00:08:35,269
Where are you running to?
Who sent you?
171
00:08:37,083 --> 00:08:39,517
Brian? I thought you were gonna
talk to your boss?
172
00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:42,381
- I am the boss.
- Hop Foo's is your restaurant?
173
00:08:42,588 --> 00:08:46,786
Sorry I lied. You just seem kind of crazy,
so I didn't want to deal.
174
00:08:46,993 --> 00:08:49,985
- But you care about conservation.
- Oh, I don't. I really don't.
175
00:08:50,196 --> 00:08:51,561
I care about my restaurant.
176
00:08:51,764 --> 00:08:53,823
You're going down, Brian!
177
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:57,127
I'm gonna collect signatures,
I'm gonna start a petition...
178
00:08:57,336 --> 00:09:01,796
...and I will turn it in
to the person who's in charge.
179
00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:03,066
Of restaurants.
180
00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:07,406
- I'm gonna report you to the city.
- Oh, no, not the city.
181
00:09:07,613 --> 00:09:09,979
No! You're a dick, Brian.
182
00:09:10,182 --> 00:09:13,151
I'm gonna burn down your building.
I won't do that. I won't do that.
183
00:09:13,352 --> 00:09:17,186
Why do people suck? Agh, ow!
184
00:09:20,259 --> 00:09:21,988
COACH:
Okay, we're gonna warm up with music.
185
00:09:22,628 --> 00:09:25,324
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]
186
00:09:25,531 --> 00:09:27,590
- Yeah, you feel that?
- I guess so.
187
00:09:29,268 --> 00:09:31,532
Yeah. Loosen up those shoulders.
188
00:09:33,839 --> 00:09:35,739
Move those arms.
189
00:09:35,942 --> 00:09:38,172
- Arms, not face.
- Sorry, thought you said face.
190
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:44,038
- Sexy. Working out is sexy.
- That's not sexy, this is sexy.
191
00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:46,407
That is not sexy.
192
00:09:47,653 --> 00:09:50,053
Ooh. Uh. Mm.
193
00:09:56,295 --> 00:09:58,058
Damn it!
194
00:09:58,397 --> 00:10:00,126
It's a great workout track!
195
00:10:01,567 --> 00:10:03,364
[GRUNTS]
196
00:10:04,637 --> 00:10:06,229
What's next?
197
00:10:07,373 --> 00:10:08,863
And time!
198
00:10:09,075 --> 00:10:11,703
- Yes! Whoo!
- Yes! Whoo!
199
00:10:12,745 --> 00:10:14,144
- Do it again.
- Again?
200
00:10:14,380 --> 00:10:16,075
Yeah, man.
201
00:10:17,516 --> 00:10:19,950
Six, seven, eight...
202
00:10:20,152 --> 00:10:21,642
Come on, man!
203
00:10:23,589 --> 00:10:26,080
- Mine's broken.
- Push through it, man.
204
00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:27,919
Thank God you're here, Cece.
205
00:10:28,127 --> 00:10:30,493
What's the emergency?
Why does Jess need this Chinese food?
206
00:10:30,696 --> 00:10:31,924
No, no, no, I made that up.
207
00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:35,931
- You tricked me into getting you food?
- Yes.
208
00:10:36,135 --> 00:10:37,568
- Why?
- Nick, what is this?
209
00:10:37,770 --> 00:10:40,295
For after. Don't worry about it.
I will be right back.
210
00:10:40,506 --> 00:10:41,939
[SIGHS]
211
00:10:43,109 --> 00:10:44,736
[IN FRENCH ACCENT]
Hello there.
212
00:10:45,878 --> 00:10:48,403
- I'm Cece. I remember you.
- [IN NORMAL VOICE] Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
213
00:10:48,614 --> 00:10:51,082
Great memory.
That's what's up. That's what's up.
214
00:10:51,283 --> 00:10:53,513
No doubt. Diggity.
215
00:10:53,719 --> 00:10:55,687
[LAUGHS]
216
00:11:00,793 --> 00:11:03,193
- Nick!
- Breasts... Ni...
217
00:11:03,796 --> 00:11:06,663
This is for the food,
and there's a little extra for you.
218
00:11:07,533 --> 00:11:10,161
- Oh, my God, are you tipping me?
- Yeah.
219
00:11:11,037 --> 00:11:13,471
If I'm gonna get in trouble, give it back,
I gave you 4 bucks.
220
00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:16,107
I'll tip you good. I'll tip you right over.
221
00:11:16,642 --> 00:11:18,769
- Good stuff.
- Yeah, yeah. Um...
222
00:11:19,545 --> 00:11:21,172
Wish I could've said something else.
223
00:11:21,380 --> 00:11:23,348
- "Tip you right over" was good.
- Cool. Uh...
224
00:11:23,549 --> 00:11:24,982
- She single?
- Yeah, kind of.
225
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:27,345
Cool, man. What are you doing?
226
00:11:27,553 --> 00:11:31,148
- I'm gonna... It's a protein base. I'm gonna eat...
- That's not how it works.
227
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:33,325
- We're in the middle of our workout.
- We're not done yet?
228
00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:35,391
- No!
- Hey, whoa.
229
00:11:35,594 --> 00:11:38,392
I had a productive conversation
with the restaurant owner.
230
00:11:38,597 --> 00:11:40,394
Action has been taken.
Change is in the air.
231
00:11:40,599 --> 00:11:44,626
I'm gonna go research lawsuits
in my room for fun.
232
00:11:45,871 --> 00:11:48,135
- You okay?
- Stop ordering from that place, Nick.
233
00:11:48,340 --> 00:11:50,035
Nick, put the dumpling down.
234
00:11:51,477 --> 00:11:53,342
- Hi.
- What's up, Jason Street?
235
00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:56,413
The Internet said
that I had to stay off my feet...
236
00:11:56,615 --> 00:11:59,982
...then I found this wheelchair in a ditch,
so I'm ready to work out.
237
00:12:00,186 --> 00:12:03,553
Winston, go lay down.
Nick, put the dumpling down.
238
00:12:03,756 --> 00:12:05,690
Relax. Ah!
239
00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:08,326
- Did you just gasp?
- Ha-ha-ha.
240
00:12:08,527 --> 00:12:10,392
- I'm having one...
- Down.
241
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,930
I'm gonna ask you again, don't...
242
00:12:15,401 --> 00:12:16,390
Don't do it.
243
00:12:18,370 --> 00:12:20,167
Don't. Do...
244
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,675
I'm going to eat one bite of this.
245
00:12:23,876 --> 00:12:25,776
Don't do it. You're better than this.
246
00:12:25,978 --> 00:12:29,175
- I don't know if I am. I'm... Agh.
- No. Don't. Don't.
247
00:12:29,381 --> 00:12:31,713
- Stop shaking it. Let me eat it.
- What's going on?
248
00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:34,249
- Just working out. Yeah.
- Just working out.
249
00:12:35,221 --> 00:12:37,883
- Does this food have MSG in it?
- What?
250
00:12:38,090 --> 00:12:39,785
MSG makes my jaw lock up.
251
00:12:39,992 --> 00:12:41,789
- You all right, dude?
- What?
252
00:12:41,994 --> 00:12:43,962
- What's going on with yourjaw?
- Yeah, dude.
253
00:12:44,163 --> 00:12:45,630
- Agh!
- Oh, you son of a...
254
00:12:45,831 --> 00:12:48,197
Wait a minute. Ha! "No MSG."
255
00:12:50,136 --> 00:12:52,900
- Where are you going?
- Just taking Winston for a walk.
256
00:12:53,105 --> 00:12:55,437
- I think he needs some fresh air.
- Agh!
257
00:12:55,641 --> 00:12:58,303
- Damn it, Coach.
- Nick!
258
00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:00,308
Really think about your next step.
259
00:13:00,513 --> 00:13:02,208
Why do you care so much?
260
00:13:02,414 --> 00:13:04,848
This is a crucial moment. A crossroads.
261
00:13:05,050 --> 00:13:08,076
By eating that, you're telling me
you'd rather sit on the couch...
262
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:10,983
...eating dumplings
than do something with your life.
263
00:13:11,190 --> 00:13:13,055
Are you a doer or a dumpling-er?
264
00:13:13,592 --> 00:13:15,958
I'm sorry, I'm not you, man.
265
00:13:16,595 --> 00:13:18,290
I'm a dumpling-er. Mm.
266
00:13:19,999 --> 00:13:21,830
Oh, it's veggie.
267
00:13:22,067 --> 00:13:23,466
I did all that for nothing?
268
00:13:25,171 --> 00:13:26,331
I tried.
269
00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:29,406
- Where are you taking me?
- Quiet, you're my smoking gun.
270
00:13:29,608 --> 00:13:30,836
Winston's in a wheelchair?
271
00:13:31,076 --> 00:13:34,739
What's next? Roberto Benigni coming
through the halls making everybody laugh?
272
00:13:34,947 --> 00:13:37,916
Damn it! Agh! I'm missing everything!
273
00:13:38,117 --> 00:13:39,482
Take these.
274
00:13:40,085 --> 00:13:41,074
Ugh.
275
00:13:41,287 --> 00:13:42,311
- Hi.
- Hi.
276
00:13:42,521 --> 00:13:43,613
- Hi.
- Don't even talk.
277
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:46,485
My friend is having
an allergic reaction to your food.
278
00:13:46,692 --> 00:13:49,286
- Hey, man.
- It says "no MSG" on the menu.
279
00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:50,723
It also says it with the...
280
00:13:50,930 --> 00:13:53,831
- What's the circle with the diagonal line...?
- [MUFFLED] Ghostbusters thing.
281
00:13:54,033 --> 00:13:55,967
- What?
- From the movie Ghostbusters.
282
00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:59,695
Oh. It says it with words,
and it says it with the Ghostbusters thing.
283
00:13:59,905 --> 00:14:02,032
- Just calm down.
- Here's what's gonna happen.
284
00:14:02,241 --> 00:14:04,675
You're gonna stop putting
these menus everywhere...
285
00:14:04,877 --> 00:14:07,971
...or I'll show the people here
what happens when you eat the food.
286
00:14:08,180 --> 00:14:09,374
I actually like the food.
287
00:14:09,615 --> 00:14:11,810
Listen, Jess, Chinese food is MSG.
288
00:14:12,017 --> 00:14:13,382
America is living a lie.
289
00:14:13,619 --> 00:14:15,712
We distribute menus
so people order the food.
290
00:14:15,921 --> 00:14:17,980
Just accept that.
That's the way things are.
291
00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:21,717
No. I am done accepting things
the way they are.
292
00:14:21,927 --> 00:14:27,058
Because there are menus everywhere,
and there are kids who wanna see the ocean.
293
00:14:27,266 --> 00:14:30,394
- What?
- And I don't like your vibe, dude.
294
00:14:30,603 --> 00:14:32,070
- Ugh.
JESS: Hey!
295
00:14:32,271 --> 00:14:34,671
This is what eating here
did to my friend.
296
00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:38,806
- Is that crispy noodles?
- Shut up.
297
00:14:39,011 --> 00:14:40,239
[COACH SINGING]
298
00:14:40,446 --> 00:14:41,470
Coach?
299
00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:44,649
No, no, no
300
00:14:44,850 --> 00:14:46,317
What the hell are you doing?
301
00:14:46,518 --> 00:14:47,542
Making island beats.
302
00:14:47,753 --> 00:14:50,153
I think this is what I'm gonna do
from now on.
303
00:14:50,356 --> 00:14:54,349
- Since obviously I can't coach.
- I thought we were just messing around.
304
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:57,222
- Why are you taking this so hard?
- Because, dude.
305
00:14:57,429 --> 00:15:00,592
I was trying to prove to myself
that I could still do this.
306
00:15:00,799 --> 00:15:05,236
Ever since Malia broke up with me,
I don't know, I've just been a mess.
307
00:15:05,437 --> 00:15:06,665
I can't do anything right.
308
00:15:07,406 --> 00:15:11,035
Guys, it's locked, it's unlocked.
Get it together, for real.
309
00:15:11,243 --> 00:15:13,370
What are you doing here?
I thought you were busy.
310
00:15:13,579 --> 00:15:16,844
I found this extra alarm clock,
and, uh, I thought I'd be neighborly...
311
00:15:17,049 --> 00:15:20,416
...so I'll set it up for you guys.
You're welcome.
312
00:15:21,620 --> 00:15:24,521
Wait a second, what is that?
313
00:15:25,257 --> 00:15:26,747
- What's what?
- Is that a camera?
314
00:15:26,959 --> 00:15:29,894
- Mm?
- Schmidt, are you spying on us?
315
00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:31,392
S... Ugh.
316
00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:33,792
It's a camera. I'm shocked.
317
00:15:33,999 --> 00:15:38,095
- You decided to move out. So move out.
- I am out.
318
00:15:38,304 --> 00:15:40,135
I'm actually very busy, you know that.
319
00:15:40,339 --> 00:15:44,639
I'm actually late for a very important coffee
with a dear friend of mine.
320
00:15:45,778 --> 00:15:48,975
- Who's that? Who?
- Hm? Yeah.
321
00:15:49,214 --> 00:15:51,045
Wouldn't you like to know?
322
00:15:53,285 --> 00:15:56,152
[SINGING] Tiny pants man
He don't have friends
323
00:15:56,355 --> 00:15:58,220
That's why he got the clock
324
00:15:58,424 --> 00:16:01,655
He got the clock to watch his only friends
325
00:16:03,595 --> 00:16:05,927
Enjoying your meal?
Winston enjoyed his meal...
326
00:16:06,131 --> 00:16:07,792
...until he had an allergic reaction.
327
00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:11,663
There. I drove away all your customers.
And I'm gonna do that every day...
328
00:16:11,870 --> 00:16:14,304
...until you stop with the menus.
329
00:16:14,506 --> 00:16:15,564
Earth warrior.
330
00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:18,773
- You win. I'll stop.
- Thank you.
331
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:20,741
Charles.
332
00:16:22,081 --> 00:16:23,343
You're fired.
333
00:16:23,549 --> 00:16:26,916
- What? No.
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
334
00:16:27,119 --> 00:16:28,848
- Don't fire him.
- He's the menu guy.
335
00:16:29,054 --> 00:16:30,453
- I was trying to make a difference.
- You did.
336
00:16:30,656 --> 00:16:32,851
At the beginning of the day
he had ajob. Now he doesn't.
337
00:16:33,058 --> 00:16:34,650
So congrats on your victory. You win.
338
00:16:34,860 --> 00:16:36,691
[SOBBING]
339
00:16:39,965 --> 00:16:42,331
Do you have any teaching experience?
340
00:16:42,534 --> 00:16:44,968
Does anyone have an antihistamine?
341
00:16:51,977 --> 00:16:54,673
You know, I just moved across the hall...
342
00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:57,440
...but it feels like
I moved across an entire ocean.
343
00:16:57,649 --> 00:17:00,311
People grow up, especially young people.
344
00:17:00,519 --> 00:17:02,453
- It's like my friends don't even miss me.
- Uh-huh.
345
00:17:02,654 --> 00:17:05,646
Well, they don't miss you.
They've moved on.
346
00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:09,021
What? How do you know that?
347
00:17:09,495 --> 00:17:10,962
Because he told me.
348
00:17:12,664 --> 00:17:15,963
His name is Connor,
and he went to SUNY Binghamton.
349
00:17:16,235 --> 00:17:20,035
I once lived with 40 birds,
and they all flew away.
350
00:17:20,305 --> 00:17:22,136
And I moved on.
351
00:17:23,442 --> 00:17:24,466
[GAGS]
352
00:17:24,843 --> 00:17:26,333
Slow down on the noodles, buddy.
353
00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:29,074
Well, congratulations, Miller.
You were right.
354
00:17:29,281 --> 00:17:32,045
- What happened?
- I terrorized a restaurant.
355
00:17:32,251 --> 00:17:33,980
I got a good man fired.
356
00:17:34,186 --> 00:17:37,349
I might've ran over a lizard
with my wheelchair, but I am ashamed.
357
00:17:37,556 --> 00:17:39,524
So that's what you get for trying.
358
00:17:40,359 --> 00:17:42,520
Let's see what the enemy tastes like.
359
00:17:43,095 --> 00:17:45,188
- Anybody wanna help me use the bathroom?
- No.
360
00:17:45,397 --> 00:17:47,331
Okay, I'll work it out.
361
00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:49,694
Shouldn't have even tried.
You just get hurt.
362
00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:52,564
This is such a relief, I can get fat now.
363
00:17:52,771 --> 00:17:55,103
- Guys, stop it.
- Been wanting to eat this all day.
364
00:17:55,340 --> 00:17:59,037
It's like a Chinese food ménage. Unh.
365
00:17:59,244 --> 00:18:01,337
You guys are doers,
and people like me...
366
00:18:01,547 --> 00:18:04,744
...who don't do anything,
we actually need people like you.
367
00:18:04,950 --> 00:18:06,383
JESS:
Mm.
368
00:18:06,585 --> 00:18:09,850
Oh, boy, this is bad. Uh, this...
Okay. All right.
369
00:18:10,055 --> 00:18:13,320
- I'm gonna give a speech, it's gonna fire you up.
- Got some on my pants.
370
00:18:13,525 --> 00:18:15,686
We'll start with compliments
to build confidence.
371
00:18:16,161 --> 00:18:18,595
Okay, um, Coach, you're a great guy.
372
00:18:19,798 --> 00:18:21,356
You've got strong bodies...
373
00:18:21,567 --> 00:18:22,625
Agh.
374
00:18:22,835 --> 00:18:25,303
You just need some more clients.
I believe in you.
375
00:18:26,004 --> 00:18:27,972
- Thanks.
- Jess, you're awesome.
376
00:18:28,173 --> 00:18:32,940
You are the most resourceful, optimistic,
amazing person I've ever met in my life.
377
00:18:33,145 --> 00:18:36,706
- I can't even get my kids on a field trip.
- You can do anything. You're smart.
378
00:18:37,516 --> 00:18:40,542
- Why can't you get them on this trip?
- No way to get them to the beach.
379
00:18:40,752 --> 00:18:43,152
That's a board, I karate kick it.
380
00:18:43,355 --> 00:18:47,416
- You're not used to making speeches.
- The point is, you never give up.
381
00:18:51,096 --> 00:18:53,724
Fine. I guess you win.
382
00:18:53,932 --> 00:18:56,628
- I sort of miss being here.
- The nanny cam gave it away.
383
00:18:56,835 --> 00:19:00,566
Well, nobody helped me,
so now there is a real mess.
384
00:19:00,772 --> 00:19:03,969
Hey, Winston, do you have the money
to rent a car or a bus?
385
00:19:04,176 --> 00:19:07,907
- I found this wheelchair in a ditch.
- Is anyone gonna tell me what's going on?
386
00:19:08,113 --> 00:19:11,014
Stop! If it's not an idea
about how to rent a car or a van...
387
00:19:11,216 --> 00:19:12,808
...then I don't wanna hear it!
388
00:19:13,018 --> 00:19:14,451
Wait a minute. Nick.
389
00:19:16,121 --> 00:19:17,179
That's brilliant.
390
00:19:17,389 --> 00:19:20,916
JESS: Boys and girls, transportation
provided by Hop Foo's restaurant.
391
00:19:21,126 --> 00:19:23,651
All right, everybody, we did it.
392
00:19:24,229 --> 00:19:28,632
Ocean Conservation Day starts now.
393
00:19:28,834 --> 00:19:30,529
Welcome to the Pacific Ocean.
394
00:19:30,736 --> 00:19:33,466
GIRL: Yeah!
- The large body of water to my left.
395
00:19:33,839 --> 00:19:35,602
No horseplay, guys.
396
00:19:35,807 --> 00:19:38,037
Guys, don't talk to strangers.
397
00:19:38,243 --> 00:19:40,677
And you said it wouldn't fit.
398
00:19:40,879 --> 00:19:43,313
I knew it'd fit,
I just didn't want you to bring it.
399
00:19:44,016 --> 00:19:45,540
Careful. It's got a trick wheel.
400
00:19:45,751 --> 00:19:47,150
- I think it's fine.
- Okay.
401
00:19:48,086 --> 00:19:50,714
- Agh! Trick wheel.
- It's not fine, sorry.
402
00:19:52,724 --> 00:19:53,782
This wheelchair...
403
00:19:53,992 --> 00:19:56,017
- Miss Day.
- Hey.
404
00:19:56,228 --> 00:19:57,820
Thank you.
405
00:19:58,030 --> 00:20:00,328
Here, you deserve this.
406
00:20:00,832 --> 00:20:02,993
Oh, thank you. I love it.
407
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:08,868
But you know what? I think this actually
belongs to Nick Miller, because he did this.
408
00:20:09,074 --> 00:20:10,166
Oh, wow.
409
00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:14,573
- Is this your dad?
- How old do you think I am, little girl?
410
00:20:14,780 --> 00:20:16,577
All right.
411
00:20:17,716 --> 00:20:21,413
- I don't want this gift. Ha, ha.
- It's her favorite hat.
412
00:20:21,853 --> 00:20:24,321
Hey. You made a difference.
How does it feel?
413
00:20:26,391 --> 00:20:27,551
It feels good.
414
00:20:27,759 --> 00:20:30,023
Yeah, actually, it feels great.
I feel like, um...
415
00:20:30,862 --> 00:20:33,092
I don't know, I feel like running.
416
00:20:33,298 --> 00:20:35,858
- Hey, Coach, you wanna show me how?
- How to run?
417
00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:37,365
Come on, coach me.
418
00:20:37,569 --> 00:20:39,560
Is this right, Coach?
Am I doing it right?
419
00:20:39,771 --> 00:20:42,035
Miller, you sorry excuse
for a human being...
420
00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:45,074
...you are shaped like a beanbag chair!
I will sit in you!
421
00:20:45,277 --> 00:20:46,335
WINSTON:
No, he can do it.
422
00:20:46,545 --> 00:20:50,572
I'm coming too,
because I ain't a quitter. Ironside!
423
00:20:51,550 --> 00:20:52,949
I'm coming. I'm com...
424
00:20:53,151 --> 00:20:54,243
Agh! Unh.
425
00:20:54,453 --> 00:20:55,750
I'm all-terrain, baby.
426
00:20:55,954 --> 00:20:58,889
- I was wrong about you. You're not a quitter!
- Whoo!
427
00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:02,083
- Now please, quit!
- Glad I got to see that.
428
00:21:02,294 --> 00:21:05,855
Oh, Schmidt, here's your key back.
429
00:21:07,065 --> 00:21:08,760
We kind of like having you around.
430
00:21:11,837 --> 00:21:13,600
Thanks.
431
00:21:13,805 --> 00:21:16,740
This is just a copy though.
I have like 50 of them at home.
432
00:21:17,109 --> 00:21:18,440
WINSTON:
What are y'all doing to me?
433
00:21:18,644 --> 00:21:21,112
- Your students are burying Winston.
- He likes it.
434
00:21:21,313 --> 00:21:23,474
Get away from me. Where your parents at?
435
00:21:23,682 --> 00:21:25,775
Shoo, children, shoo.
436
00:21:26,918 --> 00:21:28,715
Away now. Be away.
437
00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:30,820
- Get out of here.
WINSTON: Don't you understand?
438
00:21:31,023 --> 00:21:33,287
- Shut up, Winston.
- I'm family, you can't do this to me!
439
00:21:34,660 --> 00:21:35,888
COACH:
This is karma.
440
00:21:36,094 --> 00:21:37,288
[LAUGHING]
441
00:21:37,496 --> 00:21:39,895
Oh, Winston.
Ripped By mstoll