1
00:00:01,725 --> 00:00:03,827
Business at Rent-a-Swag
could not be better.
2
00:00:03,840 --> 00:00:05,831
Yesterday Jaden Smith
came in, and he was like,
3
00:00:05,862 --> 00:00:09,484
"Look, I want to quit the music/acting
business and work here with you."
4
00:00:09,522 --> 00:00:12,830
And I was like, "Jaden, be serious. The
world needs you. You have a gift."
5
00:00:12,853 --> 00:00:15,164
Ever since my client opened
his store across the street,
6
00:00:15,186 --> 00:00:16,610
your sales have plummeted.
7
00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:19,371
It's only a matter of time
before you're out of business.
8
00:00:19,671 --> 00:00:21,909
But my client has had
a moment of weakness,
9
00:00:21,934 --> 00:00:24,801
something he referred
to as "sympathy"?
10
00:00:25,623 --> 00:00:26,949
He's made you a final offer...
11
00:00:26,977 --> 00:00:29,948
$40,000 for Rent-a-Swag
and all of its contents.
12
00:00:29,983 --> 00:00:31,133
I suggest you take it.
13
00:00:31,150 --> 00:00:34,442
Well, I've heard all the facts, and it's
pretty obvious what I have to do...
14
00:00:34,763 --> 00:00:38,338
Get a big old mug of hot chocolate, put
on my thinking PJs, and get back to you.
15
00:00:38,350 --> 00:00:40,826
The offer is valid
for 48 hours.
16
00:00:41,066 --> 00:00:43,743
We would also be interested
in acquiring your thinking PJs.
17
00:00:43,761 --> 00:00:46,621
Listen to me very carefully.
18
00:00:46,658 --> 00:00:48,094
No matter what happens,
19
00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:52,587
you will never acquire
my thinking PJs
20
00:00:52,606 --> 00:00:55,402
or my YouTube blazer...
21
00:00:56,150 --> 00:00:58,651
Nonnegotiable.
22
00:00:58,742 --> 00:01:01,628
[Triumphant music]
23
00:01:01,637 --> 00:01:05,510
♪ Season 6, Episode 7
"Recall Vote"
24
00:01:05,582 --> 00:01:11,582
Synced by Reef
www.addic7ed.com
Resync for WEB-DL by Norther
25
00:01:19,987 --> 00:01:21,212
Sorry. Sorry.
26
00:01:21,236 --> 00:01:24,014
Larry, everyone else was able to make
it to the committee meeting on time.
27
00:01:24,038 --> 00:01:26,883
- What's your excuse? - I was voting
for you in the recall election.
28
00:01:26,912 --> 00:01:28,957
Lots of people wearing
Leslie Knope buttons.
29
00:01:28,993 --> 00:01:30,160
♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA
30
00:01:30,177 --> 00:01:33,504
No discussion about the recall election
until the polls close at 8:00.
31
00:01:33,532 --> 00:01:35,288
Let's focus on what
we can control.
32
00:01:35,310 --> 00:01:38,153
In 24 hours, we are going
to transform City Hall
33
00:01:38,172 --> 00:01:40,409
into the best haunted house
Pawnee has ever seen.
34
00:01:40,433 --> 00:01:41,483
There's been a mistake.
35
00:01:41,508 --> 00:01:44,789
This says that I'm in charge
of the silly skeleton room,
36
00:01:44,807 --> 00:01:48,007
when really it should say
"the undead serial killer room."
37
00:01:48,026 --> 00:01:51,726
- Who do I talk to about changing this?
- It's recall day. I've made my case,
38
00:01:51,752 --> 00:01:54,190
and the latest polls
have it as a dead heat,
39
00:01:54,213 --> 00:01:56,652
so there's nothing
left to do but wait.
40
00:01:56,778 --> 00:02:00,486
I'm fine. I mean, I got stuff to do.
I'm planning a haunted house.
41
00:02:00,606 --> 00:02:02,782
Plus, um...
42
00:02:02,813 --> 00:02:05,080
It's Kevin Pollack’s birthday.
43
00:02:05,249 --> 00:02:07,085
That's something
to focus on today.
44
00:02:07,122 --> 00:02:10,702
Who cares about the recall?
It's Kevin's day.
45
00:02:11,106 --> 00:02:12,087
I don't know what to do...
46
00:02:12,109 --> 00:02:15,311
I could take the offer and break
even, but I've come so far.
47
00:02:15,801 --> 00:02:19,989
Ron, can you put some more tiny
marshmallow in my hot chocky?
48
00:02:21,650 --> 00:02:25,138
- Thank you. - If there was something
I could do for you, I would.
49
00:02:25,150 --> 00:02:27,101
Maybe you should try
taking a walk...
50
00:02:27,136 --> 00:02:28,299
Out of my office.
51
00:02:28,336 --> 00:02:30,437
[Screams]
52
00:02:30,474 --> 00:02:33,907
- Ron! You're in Bloosh!
- What?
53
00:02:34,036 --> 00:02:37,051
- Ron's in Bloosh?
- Ron is in Bloosh!
54
00:02:37,103 --> 00:02:38,586
[Laughing]
55
00:02:38,608 --> 00:02:39,845
What is Bloosh?
56
00:02:39,876 --> 00:02:42,962
Bloosh is a weekly lifestyle
email written by Annabel Porter.
57
00:02:42,992 --> 00:02:45,173
She used to be the face of
the Eagleton phone book.
58
00:02:45,226 --> 00:02:47,122
Then she moved to Hollywood
to pursue her dream
59
00:02:47,140 --> 00:02:49,197
of becoming friends with
a bunch of celebrities.
60
00:02:49,251 --> 00:02:51,805
Then she moved back to
become a lifestyle guru.
61
00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:55,265
She's legit. She spent four months
living in Kate Bosworth's pool house.
62
00:02:55,286 --> 00:03:00,099
"A Ron Swanson-designed chair is
the must-have item of the season,"
63
00:03:00,117 --> 00:03:03,727
"along with red quinoa, wind
therapy, and buying an island."
64
00:03:03,759 --> 00:03:05,226
Annabel says
that buying an island
65
00:03:05,245 --> 00:03:09,210
is the only real way to know that your
goji-berry farm is pesticide-free.
66
00:03:09,237 --> 00:03:12,250
I've been trying to get
Rent-a-Swag in Bloosh for months.
67
00:03:12,293 --> 00:03:15,674
And now that you got in, I can get in too.
Congratulations, Ron! We did it!
68
00:03:15,714 --> 00:03:18,933
- Someone's getting a new leather jacket.
- I don't want a leather jacket.
69
00:03:18,976 --> 00:03:21,207
It's for me. This
is a great day!
70
00:03:22,064 --> 00:03:23,802
Both:
Ron's in Bloosh!
71
00:03:23,827 --> 00:03:25,663
- Ron's in Bloosh!
- What?
72
00:03:25,681 --> 00:03:26,963
Both:
Ron's in Bloosh!
73
00:03:26,999 --> 00:03:28,966
- Do it.
- Both: Ron's in Bloosh!
74
00:03:31,649 --> 00:03:35,152
April, you seem depressed,
and I would know.
75
00:03:35,187 --> 00:03:38,074
I spent most of last year being
treated by Dr. Richard Nygard
76
00:03:38,099 --> 00:03:39,605
for my own emotional problems.
77
00:03:39,627 --> 00:03:41,466
Yeah, I just miss Andy.
78
00:03:41,503 --> 00:03:44,834
Halloween was, like,
kind of our thing.
79
00:03:44,865 --> 00:03:47,578
Every year, we would dress up like
demons and egg Larry's house.
80
00:03:47,613 --> 00:03:49,344
- That was you?
- Larry, please.
81
00:03:49,366 --> 00:03:50,960
We're having a private
conversation.
82
00:03:51,011 --> 00:03:53,386
Well, I'd like to make
Halloween fun for you,
83
00:03:53,430 --> 00:03:55,543
like Andy would have,
starting right now...
84
00:03:55,561 --> 00:03:57,657
With scary,
scary monster claws!
85
00:03:57,845 --> 00:04:01,151
Okay, people, the grand
opening is in 20 hours.
86
00:04:01,175 --> 00:04:03,624
Larry, you had
the easiest job...
87
00:04:03,649 --> 00:04:04,943
Two triangles and a tooth.
88
00:04:04,972 --> 00:04:07,828
Nobody wants Gengurch-family-themed
Jack-o-lanterns.
89
00:04:07,853 --> 00:04:10,625
- Gayle likes them.
- Is any of this even good?
90
00:04:10,661 --> 00:04:13,027
Why didn't we call it
"City Hall-oween"?
91
00:04:13,045 --> 00:04:15,171
Okay, we need to change
every single banner.
92
00:04:15,203 --> 00:04:17,005
Leslie's been holding it
together pretty well,
93
00:04:17,017 --> 00:04:18,918
but today is when
she needs us the most.
94
00:04:18,938 --> 00:04:22,547
That's why we formed the Leslie
Knope emotional support task force.
95
00:04:22,566 --> 00:04:25,586
Anything she could possibly need
to get her through these final hours,
96
00:04:25,617 --> 00:04:27,111
we got it covered...
97
00:04:27,172 --> 00:04:31,222
Back rubs, YouTube videos of turtles
and birds becoming friends...
98
00:04:31,247 --> 00:04:34,775
A poster announcing
the new Lilith Fair concert.
99
00:04:35,019 --> 00:04:36,644
It's fake,
but it'll buy us an hour.
100
00:04:36,674 --> 00:04:39,746
We even have a secret hand signal
in case we think she needs help.
101
00:04:41,372 --> 00:04:43,618
It's loosely based
on the Klingon greeting salute.
102
00:04:43,642 --> 00:04:46,973
I just learned that. And if I had
known, I would not have agreed to it.
103
00:04:47,017 --> 00:04:51,696
Uh, hey, Leslie, how about instead of
slightly changing a lot of banners,
104
00:04:51,702 --> 00:04:54,766
we paint our toenails
to look like pumpkins?
105
00:04:54,815 --> 00:04:57,084
Fun! Ann, you're a genius!
106
00:04:57,131 --> 00:04:59,680
Your brain is almost as
perfect as your face.
107
00:05:01,073 --> 00:05:04,343
Hey, Ron, baby, what are
the hot deets on Bloosh?
108
00:05:04,393 --> 00:05:06,411
Start over and
speak differently.
109
00:05:06,430 --> 00:05:08,899
Sorry. Did you call that P.R. guy?
What's the latest news?
110
00:05:08,941 --> 00:05:12,293
Apparently, Joan Callamezzo
wants me to go on Pawnee Today
111
00:05:12,311 --> 00:05:14,949
to discuss my chairs
with this Porter woman.
112
00:05:15,001 --> 00:05:15,932
I said no.
113
00:05:15,951 --> 00:05:18,579
Ron, you said if there was something
you could do to help me, you would.
114
00:05:18,613 --> 00:05:21,038
Getting in Bloosh is my last
chance to save my store.
115
00:05:21,065 --> 00:05:22,834
You have to go and take
me so I can meet her.
116
00:05:22,876 --> 00:05:24,446
- Please?
- Fine.
117
00:05:24,665 --> 00:05:26,715
If it's that important
to your company, I'll do it.
118
00:05:26,733 --> 00:05:27,884
Yes!
119
00:05:27,925 --> 00:05:32,525
Now, I know high-end, Internet-only
lifestyle magazine really isn't your scene,
120
00:05:32,551 --> 00:05:36,114
so Donna and I wrote up
some cocktail banter
121
00:05:36,133 --> 00:05:39,651
and some conversation snippets
for you to practice so you can fit in.
122
00:05:40,492 --> 00:05:44,654
"Annabel, could I be more jels
of your low-lights right now?"
123
00:05:44,691 --> 00:05:48,343
"I mean, O.M.Squee,
talk about bangs envy."
124
00:05:48,368 --> 00:05:50,648
Oof, you got a long way
to go, Swanson.
125
00:05:50,732 --> 00:05:54,108
- Let's go again, from the top.
- I regret everything.
126
00:05:54,372 --> 00:05:56,497
- Babe, you made it. It's 8:00.
- Thank God.
127
00:05:56,530 --> 00:05:59,487
Okay, everyone, great
work, as always.
128
00:05:59,716 --> 00:06:03,169
I'm gonna stay here and just kind
of wait for the results to pour in.
129
00:06:03,207 --> 00:06:05,101
Thank you. I'll see
you all tomorrow.
130
00:06:05,119 --> 00:06:06,992
We're not going anywhere.
We're staying with you.
131
00:06:07,015 --> 00:06:09,302
No, really, it's gonna be
hours before they call it.
132
00:06:09,326 --> 00:06:12,396
We're not leaving, woman.
Stop trying to get rid of us.
133
00:06:12,422 --> 00:06:15,128
Yeah, I made frappuccinos for
a little caffeine boost,
134
00:06:15,161 --> 00:06:17,067
and Larry went to get
pizzas for everyone.
135
00:06:17,102 --> 00:06:19,904
Aw, that's very sweet, you guys.
Thank you.
136
00:06:19,977 --> 00:06:22,894
All right, let's hunker down.
It's gonna be a long night.
137
00:06:22,939 --> 00:06:25,658
[News program fanfare]
138
00:06:25,724 --> 00:06:29,712
Too close to call, a real
nail-biter, anybody's game...
139
00:06:29,765 --> 00:06:32,126
These are three phrases
you won't hear tonight,
140
00:06:32,168 --> 00:06:34,799
as Leslie Knope has been
voted out of office.
141
00:06:34,828 --> 00:06:36,878
What was expected to
be a close race...
142
00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:37,822
What did he say?
143
00:06:37,845 --> 00:06:39,411
...Has actually been
a not close race.
144
00:06:39,430 --> 00:06:42,643
Pawnee voters have decisively
removed Leslie Knope...
145
00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:44,461
- Honey, I'm so sorry.
- ...From the City Council.
146
00:06:44,492 --> 00:06:49,131
♪ I got-a the pizza ♪
♪ Pizza time, it's-a pizza time! ♪
147
00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:53,131
Larry, everyone is miserable, and
you are only making it worse.
148
00:06:56,605 --> 00:06:58,465
- Okay, Leslie's on her way in.
- Is she okay?
149
00:06:58,487 --> 00:07:00,104
I left her, like,
30 voice mails,
150
00:07:00,129 --> 00:07:04,178
and her outgoing message is just her
sobbing and burping and crazy laughing.
151
00:07:04,217 --> 00:07:07,105
Yeah, you know what? She's
actually handling it pretty well.
152
00:07:07,860 --> 00:07:09,404
What's up, fartwads?
153
00:07:09,630 --> 00:07:11,710
Are you eating a paunch burger?
154
00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:14,048
Well, you know what? If you
can't beat 'em, join 'em.
155
00:07:14,396 --> 00:07:17,523
I mean, I've been boycotting them
ever since Pinewood and her goons
156
00:07:17,548 --> 00:07:20,470
started this whole recall business,
but who cares now, right?
157
00:07:20,488 --> 00:07:23,161
What does it matter?
Nothing matters anymore.
158
00:07:23,254 --> 00:07:25,339
Mmm. Oh, my God.
This is good.
159
00:07:25,530 --> 00:07:27,231
This is really good.
160
00:07:27,377 --> 00:07:28,703
Why did I ever fight this?
161
00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:30,573
Have you thought about
a concession speech?
162
00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:32,277
Oh, concession speech?
163
00:07:32,319 --> 00:07:34,215
Yeah, I wrote one.
164
00:07:36,096 --> 00:07:38,769
"Eat my shorts, Jabronies.
Knope, out."
165
00:07:38,807 --> 00:07:41,965
I thought it best to revisit the
concession speech at a later time.
166
00:07:41,984 --> 00:07:43,275
[Clears throat]
167
00:07:43,732 --> 00:07:46,017
But we should focus
on the haunted house.
168
00:07:46,038 --> 00:07:52,275
And you know what I think it needs,
actually, is a papier-mâché Li'l Sebastian!
169
00:07:52,293 --> 00:07:53,977
- What?
- Oh!
170
00:07:54,118 --> 00:07:55,501
Oh!
[Clapping]
171
00:07:56,123 --> 00:07:57,311
Mm.
172
00:07:57,428 --> 00:07:59,690
I'm gonna go fall
asleep on a bench.
173
00:08:05,312 --> 00:08:07,292
I can honestly say
174
00:08:07,316 --> 00:08:10,709
today's guest is the
only person in this town
175
00:08:10,746 --> 00:08:13,713
who's a bigger deal than I am.
[Laughs]
176
00:08:14,305 --> 00:08:18,587
Please welcome lifestyle
guru Annabel Porter.
177
00:08:18,618 --> 00:08:21,938
[Jazzy music] Hello, hello.
It's me. I'm here.
178
00:08:21,965 --> 00:08:24,148
- Yes, you are.
- Hi.
179
00:08:24,167 --> 00:08:26,258
Can I just say, as a journalist,
180
00:08:26,334 --> 00:08:28,969
I feel like we're best friends.
181
00:08:29,347 --> 00:08:31,150
Tell the audience
about yourself.
182
00:08:31,188 --> 00:08:36,072
Well, I'm just a simple former
phonebook model who found her calling.
183
00:08:36,101 --> 00:08:37,899
- You know, I'm not perfect.
- Oh.
184
00:08:37,917 --> 00:08:41,261
The average woman worries about
what she looks like in a bathing suit.
185
00:08:41,286 --> 00:08:44,047
So does my nanny.
So I get it.
186
00:08:44,078 --> 00:08:46,117
Annabel, what trends are...
187
00:08:46,141 --> 00:08:48,738
Pardon the pun, but...
Trending?
188
00:08:48,757 --> 00:08:53,146
First of all, Mozambique cashmere
is the new cast-iron stove.
189
00:08:53,164 --> 00:08:54,019
Of course.
190
00:08:54,035 --> 00:08:57,848
I have found some amazing new
conflict-free paella recipes,
191
00:08:57,875 --> 00:09:02,129
and, luckily, my favorite
fishmonger now makes house calls.
192
00:09:02,154 --> 00:09:03,942
- Thank God.
- Finally.
193
00:09:03,974 --> 00:09:09,752
But my fave new item is a
deliciously bold chair...
194
00:09:09,777 --> 00:09:11,990
- Ooh.
- By local artist Ron Swanson.
195
00:09:12,005 --> 00:09:13,802
Ron Swanson is here.
196
00:09:13,827 --> 00:09:18,290
He will be joining us after
the break, so stick around.
197
00:09:18,350 --> 00:09:21,191
Did that woman call
my chair "delicious"?
198
00:09:21,411 --> 00:09:22,861
Whoo, Happy Halloween.
199
00:09:22,903 --> 00:09:25,666
Oh, caterpillar!
Thank you.
200
00:09:25,724 --> 00:09:27,775
Hey, guys, come on in.
201
00:09:27,894 --> 00:09:31,227
- Welcome to the den of horrors.
- Where's all the scary stuff?
202
00:09:31,260 --> 00:09:33,146
Scary stuff is
invisible, Leah...
203
00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:36,654
Broken dreams, disappointment,
achieving your greatest goal
204
00:09:36,673 --> 00:09:40,160
and having it all fall apart and knowing
that you'll never climb any higher.
205
00:09:40,352 --> 00:09:41,862
Can we have some candy?
206
00:09:41,880 --> 00:09:44,262
I'm gonna give you something
sweeter than candy, Ryan...
207
00:09:44,364 --> 00:09:45,526
The truth.
208
00:09:45,547 --> 00:09:48,585
It's very possible that some
of you have already peaked.
209
00:09:48,635 --> 00:09:50,273
It's all downhill
from here, turkeys.
210
00:09:50,302 --> 00:09:53,008
Okay, let's say good-bye
to Ms. Knope, kids.
211
00:09:53,038 --> 00:09:53,901
It is Ms. Knope.
212
00:09:53,917 --> 00:09:57,372
It's not city councilwoman Knope, because
that chapter of my life is already over.
213
00:09:57,409 --> 00:09:59,278
Just remember, kids,
214
00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:01,349
nothing gold can stay.
215
00:10:01,494 --> 00:10:02,640
Okay.
216
00:10:03,223 --> 00:10:07,225
Oh, my goodness, we are back with
America's greatest leader...
217
00:10:07,243 --> 00:10:11,524
[Laughs] Annabel Porter and
her new favorite artisan,
218
00:10:11,555 --> 00:10:14,424
local woodworker Ron Swanson.
219
00:10:14,726 --> 00:10:15,614
Hello.
220
00:10:15,632 --> 00:10:18,175
I discovered Ron's chairs
a few months ago,
221
00:10:18,192 --> 00:10:23,730
and what I absolutely love about a Swanson
is you can really use it for anything.
222
00:10:23,759 --> 00:10:26,378
Yes, mostly you use
it for sitting.
223
00:10:26,398 --> 00:10:29,648
Make it a rustic accent
piece in your solarium.
224
00:10:29,684 --> 00:10:32,845
Even better, use it as a focal
point in your yoga tent.
225
00:10:32,888 --> 00:10:35,188
Put it by a table
and eat a meal.
226
00:10:35,206 --> 00:10:37,985
[Chuckles] We don't do
meals in my home.
227
00:10:38,010 --> 00:10:42,230
No, every two hours, we eat
what I like to call a food tease,
228
00:10:42,274 --> 00:10:45,330
like an oat wedge or
a seaweed lozenge.
229
00:10:45,347 --> 00:10:48,714
Can I just say... And I think
this is really important,
230
00:10:48,738 --> 00:10:51,476
so I need everyone to shut up...
231
00:10:52,266 --> 00:10:55,268
- I love your hair.
- Oh. Thank you.
232
00:10:55,378 --> 00:10:57,279
It's genetic and unattainable.
233
00:10:58,580 --> 00:11:01,007
[Spooky music playing]
234
00:11:01,117 --> 00:11:03,761
I am scaring you!
235
00:11:03,886 --> 00:11:07,715
I could see you. There's, like, a
million mirrors in front of me.
236
00:11:07,879 --> 00:11:10,249
And you're never gonna make
me not miss Andy, okay?
237
00:11:10,274 --> 00:11:14,312
What about this? I'm Bert
Macklin, friendly lifeguard.
238
00:11:14,349 --> 00:11:18,002
Bert Macklin is not a lifeguard.
He's an FBI agent.
239
00:11:18,023 --> 00:11:19,429
Really?
240
00:11:19,454 --> 00:11:21,962
- That's even harder to believe.
- Just stop, okay?
241
00:11:21,974 --> 00:11:24,850
Your lame attempts at trying
to cheer me up are not working.
242
00:11:24,879 --> 00:11:29,124
Now I'm sad that I miss Andy and sad
that I can't make fun of you to Andy.
243
00:11:29,192 --> 00:11:31,580
I understand. I'm sorry.
244
00:11:31,597 --> 00:11:35,234
I've failed you, both as a
scary monster and a friend.
245
00:11:42,506 --> 00:11:45,842
[Country music playing]
246
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:49,519
Hey, I am really sorry. I
know you must feel awful.
247
00:11:49,537 --> 00:11:50,632
I don't feel awful.
248
00:11:50,653 --> 00:11:53,462
You know, actually, I feel
like I can finally relax.
249
00:11:53,578 --> 00:11:55,537
Accepting that you've
peaked is very freeing.
250
00:11:55,562 --> 00:11:59,781
Yeah, I know the feeling. I was impeached
when I was 18, and it was brutal.
251
00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:02,568
But you just have to keep
climbing back up that hill.
252
00:12:02,615 --> 00:12:04,159
Or do you?
253
00:12:04,288 --> 00:12:07,751
Maybe instead of working super
hard to rebuild your life,
254
00:12:07,786 --> 00:12:12,466
you just said, "I peaked.
Wow. What a great run."
255
00:12:12,599 --> 00:12:15,094
"And now I'm going to spend
the rest of my life really chill."
256
00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:18,445
Well, sure, I mean, part of
that sounds very appealing.
257
00:12:18,460 --> 00:12:20,386
- Yeah.
- But, n-no.
258
00:12:20,398 --> 00:12:22,626
Uh, see, i-it was important
for me...
259
00:12:22,735 --> 00:12:24,981
See, I took a job in City
budget crisis management,
260
00:12:24,993 --> 00:12:28,398
and now I work for
a candy charity.
261
00:12:29,274 --> 00:12:30,980
Oh, God, did I peak
when I was 18?
262
00:12:31,006 --> 00:12:33,206
- There it is.
- Drink up.
263
00:12:33,557 --> 00:12:36,358
♪
264
00:12:36,623 --> 00:12:37,723
- Whoo!
- Shots!
265
00:12:37,775 --> 00:12:39,558
[Excited chatter]
266
00:12:40,376 --> 00:12:42,765
B-13 shots.
267
00:12:42,855 --> 00:12:44,594
Bird bath salts.
268
00:12:44,638 --> 00:12:47,466
[Laughing] Wha...?
Champagne decanters!
269
00:12:47,558 --> 00:12:49,527
This is heaven.
270
00:12:50,012 --> 00:12:51,362
I love your chair.
271
00:12:51,381 --> 00:12:53,557
I need 12 for my
stepdaughter's craft room.
272
00:12:53,575 --> 00:12:56,435
Well, I make two a year,
so maybe in six years.
273
00:12:56,463 --> 00:12:58,251
- Can you put me on the wait list?
- Me too...
274
00:12:58,269 --> 00:13:00,809
Unless your chair was ever touched
by someone who ate refined sugar.
275
00:13:00,828 --> 00:13:03,900
Then I can't buy any of your chairs,
and I protest this entire event.
276
00:13:04,016 --> 00:13:05,754
Okay, Ron, Annabel’s
coming over.
277
00:13:05,783 --> 00:13:09,354
When you talk me up, be sure to
mention that you really admire
278
00:13:09,380 --> 00:13:12,111
how I take big risks with
men's neck accessories.
279
00:13:12,141 --> 00:13:14,942
- There he is.
- Hello, hello.
280
00:13:15,016 --> 00:13:18,061
Thank you for your kind words
about my chairs, Miss Porter.
281
00:13:18,086 --> 00:13:19,809
No, thank us.
282
00:13:19,852 --> 00:13:22,601
You are about to
make a ton of money.
283
00:13:22,625 --> 00:13:24,042
I want to license your designs.
284
00:13:24,143 --> 00:13:28,113
We are going to put Swanson chairs in
every six-bedroom home in the Midwest.
285
00:13:28,147 --> 00:13:31,549
If my chairs were mass-produced,
they wouldn't be Swanson chairs.
286
00:13:31,581 --> 00:13:33,406
Swanson chairs are handmade.
287
00:13:33,423 --> 00:13:37,004
Yes, and now they will be made by
thousands of tiny Chinese hands.
288
00:13:37,104 --> 00:13:38,104
[Clears throat]
289
00:13:38,414 --> 00:13:41,902
Oh, Miss Porter, this is my
very good friend Tom Haverford.
290
00:13:41,918 --> 00:13:45,931
He's a big fan of your...
Whatever you call what you do.
291
00:13:45,949 --> 00:13:48,059
Please speak to each
other while I leave.
292
00:13:48,076 --> 00:13:51,411
Oh, no, I am not done with you,
you wicked little so-and-so.
293
00:13:51,435 --> 00:13:52,578
Terrific.
294
00:13:53,172 --> 00:13:55,720
You know what? I had my time,
you know? I did my thing.
295
00:13:55,736 --> 00:13:59,063
I wanted to be a city councilor, and
I did, and I was, and I was like, whoo!
296
00:13:59,090 --> 00:14:00,643
And the people were like,
pffft!
297
00:14:01,056 --> 00:14:04,577
- At least we have each other.
- I love you so much.
298
00:14:04,601 --> 00:14:06,136
I love you too.
299
00:14:06,212 --> 00:14:07,537
- This is real.
- I know.
300
00:14:07,556 --> 00:14:09,004
- You're my husband.
- You're my wife.
301
00:14:09,028 --> 00:14:11,542
- You married me in front of people.
- I did. I was there.
302
00:14:11,561 --> 00:14:15,147
We may have peaked, but it doesn't matter.
We need to do something big, you know,
303
00:14:15,171 --> 00:14:18,041
something that really lets people know
that we're gonna love each other forever.
304
00:14:18,067 --> 00:14:20,180
Yeah! What is it?
305
00:14:20,267 --> 00:14:21,374
I got it.
306
00:14:21,431 --> 00:14:23,700
Hello, sir.
We are sober.
307
00:14:23,718 --> 00:14:26,136
We would like to get tattoos on our
bodies, 'cause we love each other.
308
00:14:26,155 --> 00:14:28,399
Tattoos? This is a pawnshop.
309
00:14:28,863 --> 00:14:31,001
- But, yeah, sure, I can do that.
- [Gasps] Awww!
310
00:14:31,024 --> 00:14:33,315
Yes! It happened!
[Laughing]
311
00:14:33,350 --> 00:14:35,744
[Gasps] Look what he's doing.
He's breaking pens.
312
00:14:35,759 --> 00:14:39,709
- This is the idea of the century.
- Right here.
313
00:14:39,780 --> 00:14:41,080
Both: Ow!
314
00:14:41,398 --> 00:14:42,767
Come here.
315
00:14:46,580 --> 00:14:50,330
My store is called Rent-a-Swag. It's
a clothing rental service for teens.
316
00:14:50,369 --> 00:14:52,390
It's an interesting idea.
Are you guys doing well?
317
00:14:52,409 --> 00:14:54,137
- We're doing amazing.
- Mm.
318
00:14:54,159 --> 00:14:56,153
And it'd be perfect for Bloosh.
319
00:14:56,172 --> 00:14:58,884
Why don't you take out whatever
you wrote about my chairs
320
00:14:58,909 --> 00:15:01,589
and put something in about
Rent-a-Swag instead?
321
00:15:01,609 --> 00:15:05,620
This month's trends are final.
I can't just throw a trend out.
322
00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:10,432
But my Bloosh scouts have started
trend-tracking for the February zine blast.
323
00:15:10,457 --> 00:15:13,107
- Good God, these words.
- I'll have them stop by your store.
324
00:15:13,129 --> 00:15:15,210
That'll be too late. We'll
be out of business by then.
325
00:15:15,229 --> 00:15:16,893
I thought you said
you were doing well.
326
00:15:17,458 --> 00:15:21,060
Ronnie, one last time, have you
reconsidered mass production?
327
00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:23,672
I can sell your
chairs on my site.
328
00:15:23,690 --> 00:15:25,100
No, thank you, ma'am.
329
00:15:25,106 --> 00:15:28,122
I'm not interested in letting
someone else sell my work.
330
00:15:28,152 --> 00:15:29,808
Well, that's too bad.
331
00:15:31,593 --> 00:15:35,662
This party is over.
It no longer is.
332
00:15:35,772 --> 00:15:36,905
It was.
333
00:15:36,996 --> 00:15:40,860
- It was...? That was my last shot.
- Sorry, Tommy.
334
00:15:41,147 --> 00:15:43,978
Let's just grab some of that
lychee body oil and bounce.
335
00:15:43,997 --> 00:15:46,355
Can you grab me some of those
pomegranate face masks too?
336
00:15:46,374 --> 00:15:47,511
Fo' sho'.
337
00:15:48,422 --> 00:15:49,941
Can I ask you a question?
338
00:15:49,966 --> 00:15:51,854
Are we the cutest couple
you've ever seen?
339
00:15:51,885 --> 00:15:52,760
Nope.
340
00:15:52,799 --> 00:15:55,212
Okay, you want the long
needle or the short needle?
341
00:15:55,258 --> 00:15:57,742
Doesn't matter. Can't find
a short needle. Long needle it is.
342
00:15:57,782 --> 00:16:02,548
I have a big idea. I want a
portrait of Eleanor Roosevelt,
343
00:16:02,572 --> 00:16:08,275
tastefully done, and then she has a very
classy tattoo of Pat Benatar on her arm.
344
00:16:08,294 --> 00:16:09,753
And that's very subtle.
345
00:16:09,787 --> 00:16:12,179
No, scratch that. Scratch all that.
Just write "Ben".
346
00:16:12,209 --> 00:16:14,097
Do you have anything
to numb the pain?
347
00:16:14,121 --> 00:16:16,549
Sure, take a scoop
out of the pill bucket.
348
00:16:17,315 --> 00:16:19,984
Okay, you said you
wanted "mouth queen"?
349
00:16:20,007 --> 00:16:22,757
No, stop. Stop it. Stop
everything that you're doing.
350
00:16:22,775 --> 00:16:25,510
- Stop it.
- Ann's here! Ann wants a tattoo!
351
00:16:25,534 --> 00:16:26,600
- Ann!
- No, no!
352
00:16:26,642 --> 00:16:27,892
- Both: Ann!
- No!
353
00:16:27,929 --> 00:16:31,250
Shh! Ann does not want a tattoo.
No one wants a tattoo.
354
00:16:31,277 --> 00:16:33,046
Ann, relax.
355
00:16:33,070 --> 00:16:35,139
Be "respitable" for
a second, okay?
356
00:16:35,183 --> 00:16:36,839
What we are doing is not nuts.
357
00:16:36,865 --> 00:16:38,515
We are merely getting tattoos
358
00:16:38,534 --> 00:16:40,844
so that everybody knows we love each
other and that we haven't peaked.
359
00:16:40,876 --> 00:16:44,439
- It makes a lot of sense.
- Okay, we're leaving, all right?
360
00:16:44,467 --> 00:16:46,542
So say good-bye to the nice man
361
00:16:46,574 --> 00:16:49,012
and thank me for saving you
from being on Dateline.
362
00:16:49,029 --> 00:16:50,195
Okay, let's go.
Come on.
363
00:16:50,213 --> 00:16:53,080
- Good-bye, world traveler.
- Later, bro Heisen.
364
00:16:53,186 --> 00:16:55,354
- Ben.
- Come on.
365
00:16:55,407 --> 00:16:56,994
[Spooky music playing]
366
00:16:57,071 --> 00:16:59,132
I don't want to be
a failure again, Ron.
367
00:16:59,409 --> 00:17:01,360
There's no shame in failure
368
00:17:01,889 --> 00:17:03,533
if you gave it
an honest effort.
369
00:17:03,558 --> 00:17:04,602
Easy for you to say.
370
00:17:04,626 --> 00:17:07,226
People are dying to give you money for your
business, and you didn't even take it.
371
00:17:07,256 --> 00:17:10,903
I didn't sell my chairs to that
website because I value my name.
372
00:17:11,347 --> 00:17:13,963
The only thing that's important
at the end of the day
373
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:16,531
is what's on your gravestone...
Your name.
374
00:17:16,639 --> 00:17:19,933
My gravestone's gonna be a 60-inch
touchscreen with a hologram of four mes
375
00:17:19,947 --> 00:17:22,420
singing End of the Road
by Boyz II Men...
376
00:17:23,704 --> 00:17:25,038
But point taken.
377
00:17:25,146 --> 00:17:29,616
Ben, what is the first rule of the Leslie
Knope emotional support task force?
378
00:17:29,907 --> 00:17:31,167
Don't let her get a tattoo.
379
00:17:31,192 --> 00:17:33,502
- What the hell happened?
- I couldn't help it.
380
00:17:33,525 --> 00:17:37,274
She's so cute when she's coming
up with destructive ideas.
381
00:17:37,628 --> 00:17:39,516
Never send a husband to
do a best friend's job.
382
00:17:39,534 --> 00:17:41,122
Out, Wyatt.
Walk it off.
383
00:17:41,150 --> 00:17:43,268
- Walk it off.
- Fine.
384
00:17:45,068 --> 00:17:46,662
- You did it.
- Yep.
385
00:17:46,685 --> 00:17:48,590
- See you later, Ann.
- No, Knope, sit down.
386
00:17:48,611 --> 00:17:49,844
Oh.
387
00:17:49,871 --> 00:17:54,108
- You are avoiding your problems.
- What? No, I'm not.
388
00:17:54,127 --> 00:17:56,130
- Can we talk about this tomorrow?
- You were down in the polls.
389
00:17:56,156 --> 00:17:59,133
Your opponents were well
funded and well organized.
390
00:17:59,168 --> 00:18:00,882
You must have known
this would be a possibility.
391
00:18:00,898 --> 00:18:03,828
Intellectually, I knew
that I might be in trouble,
392
00:18:03,850 --> 00:18:05,984
but deep in my heart,
I never really thought...
393
00:18:06,050 --> 00:18:10,481
Ben and I tried to help you, but as usual,
you're the best person for the job.
394
00:18:10,533 --> 00:18:13,096
I wrote this. You need to
hear yourself read this.
395
00:18:15,253 --> 00:18:17,554
"They held the recall
election, and I lost."
396
00:18:19,415 --> 00:18:21,466
"I was voted out of office."
397
00:18:21,496 --> 00:18:24,565
"In 30 days, I will no longer
be a Pawnee city councilor."
398
00:18:24,589 --> 00:18:26,022
Oh, it's so hard to
read when you're drunk.
399
00:18:26,050 --> 00:18:27,414
- Keep going.
- [Clears throat]
400
00:18:27,648 --> 00:18:29,498
"But I am Leslie Knope."
401
00:18:29,882 --> 00:18:32,082
"I am more
than a city councilor."
402
00:18:32,507 --> 00:18:35,463
"I am an unstoppable
force of energy."
403
00:18:35,735 --> 00:18:41,044
"And I will use those days
to work as hard as I can."
404
00:18:41,196 --> 00:18:43,527
These are all your
ongoing projects,
405
00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,904
everything you're currently
working on for Pawnee.
406
00:18:45,944 --> 00:18:47,686
You have things to do.
407
00:18:47,704 --> 00:18:49,834
You have a month left.
Use it.
408
00:18:49,872 --> 00:18:54,913
Ann, you poetic and noble land
mermaid, you're right once again.
409
00:18:55,046 --> 00:18:55,834
Thank you.
410
00:18:55,868 --> 00:18:56,809
[Giggles]
411
00:18:56,834 --> 00:18:59,559
I flushed my car keys
down the toilet.
412
00:18:59,712 --> 00:19:01,792
- No problem.
- [Sighs]
413
00:19:04,704 --> 00:19:07,134
Eww... stop.
414
00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:09,030
Hello to you too, April.
415
00:19:09,053 --> 00:19:11,747
I'm sorry I said you
were lame, okay?
416
00:19:11,772 --> 00:19:14,751
You are, but I know you were
just trying to help me, so...
417
00:19:14,770 --> 00:19:17,194
Thank you, April.
Happy Halloween.
418
00:19:17,418 --> 00:19:20,202
And if you want to egg
Larry's house, come find me.
419
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:22,488
You guys are cute.
420
00:19:22,599 --> 00:19:25,234
- Where'd that come from?
- I'm weak.
421
00:19:25,412 --> 00:19:27,990
I miss Andy, and
it's making me weak.
422
00:19:28,217 --> 00:19:32,911
Also, if Chris puts that much effort
into making my stupid night better,
423
00:19:32,935 --> 00:19:35,723
I'm sure that he'll make
your lame life perfect.
424
00:19:36,111 --> 00:19:38,875
Or he's secretly super
in love with me.
425
00:19:38,899 --> 00:19:39,950
It's probably that.
426
00:19:39,969 --> 00:19:41,300
[Laughs]
427
00:19:41,325 --> 00:19:42,738
That's a funny joke, April.
428
00:19:42,755 --> 00:19:45,499
But the truth is, I'm very
much in love with Ann.
429
00:19:45,555 --> 00:19:47,058
Aw.
430
00:19:47,172 --> 00:19:49,353
Okay, gross.
The spell's broken.
431
00:19:51,213 --> 00:19:54,994
I've made my decision, and I'll sell you
Rent-a-Swag, but on my terms.
432
00:19:55,028 --> 00:19:55,746
Which are?
433
00:19:55,758 --> 00:19:58,829
$40,000 for the inventory, the website,
and everything else in the store,
434
00:19:58,848 --> 00:20:02,758
but I keep the name Rent-a-Swag.
It's mine, and I'm keeping it.
435
00:20:03,639 --> 00:20:06,243
The name is actually an
important part of the sale.
436
00:20:06,778 --> 00:20:08,896
- Really?
- Yes. My client likes the name.
437
00:20:08,916 --> 00:20:12,161
It's better than Tommy's Closet.
He needs the name.
438
00:20:13,528 --> 00:20:15,935
Well, I don't know what
to tell you, except...
439
00:20:16,053 --> 00:20:18,516
I'll throw in the name in
exchange for $20,000 more
440
00:20:18,541 --> 00:20:20,425
and 5% of your
client's business.
441
00:20:20,459 --> 00:20:23,596
I'll run it past my client,
but I think we have a deal.
442
00:20:24,205 --> 00:20:27,946
Ron said there's nothing more valuable
than my name, but he's not a businessman.
443
00:20:27,965 --> 00:20:30,996
I am. And now I have seed
money for my next venture.
444
00:20:31,024 --> 00:20:32,616
I sold out, baby.
445
00:20:34,329 --> 00:20:37,676
The votes have been counted,
and I have been recalled.
446
00:20:38,125 --> 00:20:39,950
I am, of course, disappointed.
447
00:20:40,030 --> 00:20:43,164
But I am still your City
councilwoman for 30 more days,
448
00:20:43,175 --> 00:20:45,749
and I intend to spend
every second I have left
449
00:20:45,768 --> 00:20:48,324
working for you and
this great city.
450
00:20:48,470 --> 00:20:51,576
The thing about being part of the Leslie
Knope emotional support task force
451
00:20:51,595 --> 00:20:54,317
is that it's a very easy job.
452
00:20:54,354 --> 00:20:56,067
She's never down for that long.
453
00:20:56,093 --> 00:20:58,182
And now that she's had
a little time to recharge,
454
00:20:58,194 --> 00:21:00,801
she is like a toddler
bouncing back from a nap.
455
00:21:00,825 --> 00:21:02,713
Hey!
There you guys are.
456
00:21:02,732 --> 00:21:04,976
Okay, Ben, I need some help
with the re-zoning thing.
457
00:21:04,992 --> 00:21:08,163
Also, I think we should paint our deck,
so I have some color samples for you.
458
00:21:08,180 --> 00:21:10,219
And to thank you both for being
there when I needed you,
459
00:21:10,244 --> 00:21:12,600
I carved your faces into
these Jack-o-lanterns.
460
00:21:12,635 --> 00:21:14,180
Ann, it was very hard
to capture your beauty,
461
00:21:14,198 --> 00:21:16,801
and, Ben, you make a sexy pumpkin...
No surprise.
462
00:21:16,849 --> 00:21:18,630
Love you both.
See you later.
463
00:21:18,768 --> 00:21:20,728
- Okay.
- Wow.
464
00:21:21,529 --> 00:21:23,242
This is amazing.
465
00:21:23,780 --> 00:21:25,248
Not bad.
466
00:21:25,451 --> 00:21:30,451
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