1 00:00:02,787 --> 00:00:05,422 ♪ Good morning, USA! 2 00:00:05,457 --> 00:00:09,360 ♪ I got a feeling that it's gonna be a wonderful day ♪ 3 00:00:09,394 --> 00:00:12,329 ♪ The sun in the sky has a smile on his face ♪ 4 00:00:12,364 --> 00:00:16,767 ♪ And he's shining a salute to the American race ♪ 5 00:00:18,637 --> 00:00:22,039 ♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say 6 00:00:22,073 --> 00:00:24,041 ♪ Good... ♪ Good morning, USA 7 00:00:24,075 --> 00:00:34,267 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 8 00:00:34,786 --> 00:00:36,153 This is some party! 9 00:00:36,187 --> 00:00:37,588 Hideki's doing it right. 10 00:00:37,622 --> 00:00:39,390 He's doing it exactly right. 11 00:00:39,424 --> 00:00:42,259 This is one of the craziest parties I've ever been to. 12 00:00:42,294 --> 00:00:44,562 And as you know, I'm friend..I'm friendly. 13 00:00:44,596 --> 00:00:47,231 I'm friendsly with Shaun White. 14 00:00:50,602 --> 00:00:52,603 Oh, my God. 15 00:00:52,637 --> 00:00:55,673 Is that... Donna Nicole Marie Banelli? 16 00:00:55,707 --> 00:00:58,909 Hey, Banelli, you got a lot of nerve showing up here! 17 00:00:58,944 --> 00:01:00,444 So what? So what? 18 00:01:00,478 --> 00:01:02,880 It's a free world. So what? 19 00:01:02,914 --> 00:01:04,415 Excuse me, Stan. 20 00:01:04,449 --> 00:01:08,018 That's the bitch who gave all my ideas to Michael Crichton. 21 00:01:08,053 --> 00:01:10,020 Hideki! Happy birthday, man! 22 00:01:10,055 --> 00:01:11,655 You're doing it just right! 23 00:01:11,690 --> 00:01:13,157 This party, 24 00:01:13,191 --> 00:01:15,960 that double-breasted jacket you're wearing with corduroys, 25 00:01:15,994 --> 00:01:17,328 the '70s pornography 26 00:01:17,362 --> 00:01:19,163 you're projecting on the wall outside. 27 00:01:19,197 --> 00:01:20,531 These two things here. 28 00:01:20,565 --> 00:01:23,233 These are the last two Etruscan urns in existence. 29 00:01:23,268 --> 00:01:26,670 Geez, Hide, how do you do it? 30 00:01:26,705 --> 00:01:30,007 You can have anything you want if you just trust your gut. 31 00:01:30,041 --> 00:01:31,475 I don't always understand 32 00:01:31,509 --> 00:01:33,844 why my gut is telling me to do something, 33 00:01:33,878 --> 00:01:38,616 but I always do it, because it has never steered me wrong. 34 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:44,088 Oh, my God, you destroyed one of the urns! 35 00:01:44,122 --> 00:01:47,358 Making this one the last one in existence. 36 00:01:47,392 --> 00:01:48,659 It's priceless now! 37 00:01:48,693 --> 00:01:50,427 Ha, that's right. 38 00:01:50,462 --> 00:01:52,563 Thank you, gut. 39 00:01:53,965 --> 00:01:55,265 So, what happened? 40 00:01:55,300 --> 00:01:56,634 Eh, wasn't her. 41 00:02:00,205 --> 00:02:03,974 And now, the final Lego to complete our official entry 42 00:02:04,009 --> 00:02:06,944 into the tri-county Lego competition! 43 00:02:06,978 --> 00:02:09,947 The four stages of Ron Howard. 44 00:02:09,981 --> 00:02:12,216 Opie, Richie Cunningham 45 00:02:12,250 --> 00:02:14,318 and Ron Howard, the director with... 46 00:02:14,352 --> 00:02:15,886 and without hat. 47 00:02:15,920 --> 00:02:17,221 Not bad. 48 00:02:17,255 --> 00:02:19,957 I love it, and I still don't know who Ron Howard is. 49 00:02:19,991 --> 00:02:21,425 What, are you an idiot? 50 00:02:21,459 --> 00:02:23,227 He's only one of the most popular 51 00:02:23,261 --> 00:02:25,496 mainstream directors of our time. 52 00:02:25,530 --> 00:02:27,231 Eh, Ron Howard's okay, 53 00:02:27,265 --> 00:02:28,666 but I prefer indie films. 54 00:02:31,102 --> 00:02:32,236 Wait a minute. 55 00:02:32,270 --> 00:02:33,637 Do you smell that? 56 00:02:33,672 --> 00:02:37,141 Corned beef, tongue, whitefish salad. 57 00:02:37,175 --> 00:02:38,575 Oh, no. 58 00:02:38,610 --> 00:02:39,810 A deli platter. 59 00:02:39,844 --> 00:02:42,646 That can only mean one thing. 60 00:02:43,782 --> 00:02:46,250 Mom, who died? 61 00:02:46,284 --> 00:02:48,686 Schmuely. 62 00:02:48,720 --> 00:02:50,387 Uncle Ira? 63 00:02:50,422 --> 00:02:52,856 What are you doing here? 64 00:02:52,891 --> 00:02:54,258 How shall I put this? 65 00:02:54,292 --> 00:02:55,693 You're a child, 66 00:02:55,727 --> 00:02:58,395 and you're gonna remember this for the rest of your life, 67 00:02:58,430 --> 00:03:00,798 so I want to make sure I say this right. 68 00:03:00,832 --> 00:03:03,434 Your dad is dead! 69 00:03:03,468 --> 00:03:07,738 He's dead! 70 00:03:10,275 --> 00:03:12,242 Man, that Hideki does it right. 71 00:03:12,277 --> 00:03:13,977 What a perfect party. 72 00:03:14,012 --> 00:03:16,013 Well, not entirely perfect. 73 00:03:16,047 --> 00:03:18,082 The cake? You noticed, too? 74 00:03:18,116 --> 00:03:20,150 Don't you hate it when you're at a party 75 00:03:20,185 --> 00:03:22,753 and you have to wait, like, forever for a piece of cake? 76 00:03:22,787 --> 00:03:24,421 Yeah, but they have to cut the cake somehow. 77 00:03:24,456 --> 00:03:25,889 But what if they didn't? 78 00:03:25,924 --> 00:03:27,444 You mean, what if they got enough cakes 79 00:03:27,459 --> 00:03:29,560 to give each and every person their own entire cake? 80 00:03:29,594 --> 00:03:31,462 No, that's not what I'm talking about at all. 81 00:03:31,496 --> 00:03:34,531 I mean, what if there was some way to cut all the pieces... 82 00:03:34,566 --> 00:03:35,933 At the same time? 83 00:03:35,967 --> 00:03:37,067 Like some sort of... 84 00:03:37,102 --> 00:03:38,402 Gridded wire blade system 85 00:03:38,436 --> 00:03:39,937 that could quickly and conveniently... 86 00:03:39,971 --> 00:03:41,572 Dice the cake into appropriately-sized pieces 87 00:03:41,606 --> 00:03:42,873 with one simple cut? 88 00:03:42,907 --> 00:03:44,441 Yes! It could even be dishwasher-safe, 89 00:03:44,476 --> 00:03:45,676 and the wire blades could... 90 00:03:45,710 --> 00:03:47,244 Roll into the handles 91 00:03:47,278 --> 00:03:49,079 so it would fit in a kitchen drawer for... Easy... 92 00:03:49,114 --> 00:03:50,354 - No... - Nonsense... - Storage? 93 00:03:50,381 --> 00:03:51,648 We could call it "Piece of Cake" 94 00:03:51,683 --> 00:03:53,317 because it makes cutting a piece of cake... 95 00:03:53,351 --> 00:03:54,718 A piece of cake! 96 00:03:55,954 --> 00:03:57,087 What was that? 97 00:03:57,122 --> 00:03:58,956 I think that was... my gut. 98 00:03:58,990 --> 00:04:01,358 Oh, my God, this is just like Hideki! 99 00:04:01,392 --> 00:04:03,327 If we listen to it, we'll get rich! 100 00:04:03,361 --> 00:04:04,995 Do you really think it could work? 101 00:04:06,331 --> 00:04:08,232 I think someone does. 102 00:04:09,467 --> 00:04:12,169 They need to be together. 103 00:04:13,772 --> 00:04:15,172 What's that? 104 00:04:15,206 --> 00:04:17,508 Need an investor? 105 00:04:18,977 --> 00:04:20,878 Oh, my God, we're really doing this! 106 00:04:20,912 --> 00:04:22,579 I know, it's really gonna happen! 107 00:04:22,614 --> 00:04:24,648 And the best part is we'll be... 108 00:04:24,682 --> 00:04:27,851 equal partners. 109 00:04:27,886 --> 00:04:30,788 With only a verbal contract based on trust. 110 00:04:30,822 --> 00:04:33,590 What more is necessary among friends? 111 00:04:45,336 --> 00:04:46,303 Snot? 112 00:04:46,337 --> 00:04:47,704 Wh-What are you doing here? 113 00:04:47,739 --> 00:04:49,373 Why aren't you at your dad's funeral? 114 00:04:49,407 --> 00:04:50,707 I'm not going. 115 00:04:50,742 --> 00:04:53,544 You're not going to your own dad's funeral? 116 00:04:53,578 --> 00:04:55,345 It's all the way in Stockton. 117 00:04:55,380 --> 00:04:56,747 And my mom isn't going. 118 00:04:56,781 --> 00:04:58,482 And besides, I didn't even know him. 119 00:04:58,516 --> 00:05:01,118 At best, we were... "friendsly." 120 00:05:01,152 --> 00:05:03,554 Now, come on, we're gonna be late for the Lego competition. 121 00:05:03,588 --> 00:05:04,721 Whoa, whoa. 122 00:05:04,756 --> 00:05:06,657 You're not going to the Lego competition. 123 00:05:06,691 --> 00:05:08,792 Snot, if you don't go to your dad's funeral, 124 00:05:08,827 --> 00:05:10,961 you're gonna regret it for the rest of your life. 125 00:05:10,995 --> 00:05:12,830 Like when I cut off my rat tail. 126 00:05:12,864 --> 00:05:14,832 Steve, this is not a big deal to me. 127 00:05:14,866 --> 00:05:16,200 I really don't care. 128 00:05:16,234 --> 00:05:18,202 Because you're in denial. 129 00:05:18,236 --> 00:05:20,337 Hmm, how do I make this clear to you? 130 00:05:22,207 --> 00:05:23,207 Opie! 131 00:05:23,241 --> 00:05:24,708 What the hell, Steve? 132 00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:25,709 New plan. 133 00:05:25,743 --> 00:05:27,311 Barry, how much gas you got? 134 00:05:27,345 --> 00:05:28,879 A half tank, but it's a big tank. 135 00:05:28,913 --> 00:05:29,980 Why? 136 00:05:30,014 --> 00:05:33,383 Because we're going to California. 137 00:05:33,418 --> 00:05:36,220 We're taking Snot to his dad's funeral. 138 00:05:36,254 --> 00:05:38,255 I said I don't want to go. 139 00:05:38,289 --> 00:05:39,857 Snot, come on. 140 00:05:39,891 --> 00:05:41,358 You know what you would do right now 141 00:05:41,392 --> 00:05:43,160 if this were one of your indie movies. 142 00:05:43,194 --> 00:05:44,728 You'd drop everything you were doing, 143 00:05:44,762 --> 00:05:47,331 hop in this car and take a cross-country trip 144 00:05:47,365 --> 00:05:49,700 to your estranged father's funeral. 145 00:05:49,734 --> 00:05:51,235 And you know where your best friends 146 00:05:51,269 --> 00:05:53,370 in the whole world are gonna be? 147 00:05:53,404 --> 00:05:56,673 Right there beside you every step of the way. 148 00:05:58,209 --> 00:06:00,944 I care about you way too much 149 00:06:00,979 --> 00:06:02,613 to let you miss something this big. 150 00:06:02,647 --> 00:06:04,448 Fine, but I'm telling you, 151 00:06:04,482 --> 00:06:07,451 I'm gonna get to that funeral and still not feel anything 152 00:06:07,485 --> 00:06:08,886 about my dad dying. 153 00:06:08,920 --> 00:06:12,222 I promise you, buddy, by the time we get there, 154 00:06:12,257 --> 00:06:14,958 you're gonna be an emotional wreck. 155 00:06:37,839 --> 00:06:43,344 ♪ I want you to move to California for yourself ♪ 156 00:06:52,850 --> 00:06:54,951 We went out in search of a way to say good-bye 157 00:06:54,985 --> 00:06:56,653 to an absent father, 158 00:06:56,687 --> 00:06:58,154 but we found a lot more than that. 159 00:06:58,189 --> 00:07:00,523 We found each other. 160 00:07:02,059 --> 00:07:04,027 Not to mention ourselves. 161 00:07:04,061 --> 00:07:06,663 And like the open road... 162 00:07:06,697 --> 00:07:09,532 we are infinite. 163 00:07:09,567 --> 00:07:12,402 Will you shut up? 164 00:07:12,436 --> 00:07:14,871 You've been narrating for four hours. 165 00:07:18,442 --> 00:07:21,110 I can't believe your dad is dead. 166 00:07:22,680 --> 00:07:24,614 Hey, how you doing? 167 00:07:24,648 --> 00:07:25,949 Fine. 168 00:07:25,983 --> 00:07:28,284 My dad was never there for me when he was alive, 169 00:07:28,319 --> 00:07:29,999 so it doesn't feel like anything's changed. 170 00:07:30,020 --> 00:07:32,922 I mean, he was in and out of my life until I was eight, 171 00:07:32,957 --> 00:07:35,191 and then he disappeared completely. 172 00:07:36,894 --> 00:07:39,362 I used to get all excited when he was around 173 00:07:39,396 --> 00:07:41,531 'cause he'd give me Cheetos for breakfast. 174 00:07:41,565 --> 00:07:44,167 It wasn't until I got older that I came to understand 175 00:07:44,201 --> 00:07:47,270 that he did that because he didn't care about me at a. 176 00:07:47,304 --> 00:07:49,739 He didn't even care enough to get me real Cheetos. 177 00:07:49,773 --> 00:07:53,476 It was some off-brand knockoff called "Cheese O's." 178 00:07:53,510 --> 00:07:56,145 I had no idea that while I was swimming 179 00:07:56,180 --> 00:07:58,314 in name-brand snack foods, 180 00:07:58,349 --> 00:08:01,184 everything was so weird for you. 181 00:08:01,218 --> 00:08:02,919 I'm gonna need a minute, guys. 182 00:08:06,857 --> 00:08:10,159 Look, there's a lonely hitchhiker. 183 00:08:10,194 --> 00:08:13,429 Let's pick him up and you can analyze him. 184 00:08:20,938 --> 00:08:22,372 Whew, thanks for the ride. 185 00:08:22,406 --> 00:08:24,741 I was standing out there for quite a while. 186 00:08:24,775 --> 00:08:26,075 It's cool, man. 187 00:08:26,110 --> 00:08:28,244 We're on a pretty heavy trip ourselves. 188 00:08:28,279 --> 00:08:29,946 His dad died. 189 00:08:29,980 --> 00:08:31,614 So, yeah, there's that. 190 00:08:31,649 --> 00:08:34,117 Oh, I'm sorry to hear about that. 191 00:08:34,151 --> 00:08:35,585 Thanks, but I didn't really... 192 00:08:35,619 --> 00:08:37,220 Yeah. 193 00:08:37,254 --> 00:08:40,290 It's been pretty rough on all of us. 194 00:08:40,324 --> 00:08:42,025 Barry, pull over. 195 00:08:42,059 --> 00:08:45,261 We need to wander around the woods. 196 00:08:46,764 --> 00:08:48,531 You've been running from your feelings, Snot. 197 00:08:48,565 --> 00:08:50,633 But that ends here. 198 00:08:50,668 --> 00:08:52,902 The only thing more natural than nature 199 00:08:52,937 --> 00:08:54,804 is feelings. 200 00:08:54,838 --> 00:08:56,639 Okay, I'm out. 201 00:08:56,674 --> 00:08:58,541 I don't think I can relate to this journey. 202 00:08:58,575 --> 00:09:00,643 The truth is I have a serious meth addiction 203 00:09:00,678 --> 00:09:02,912 and I need to get to an underpass before nightfall. 204 00:09:02,947 --> 00:09:05,081 Good luck and Godspeed. 205 00:09:26,036 --> 00:09:28,604 That could be your dad right now. 206 00:09:28,639 --> 00:09:30,873 Ca-caw! 207 00:10:42,546 --> 00:10:44,547 What the hell is that thing? 208 00:10:44,581 --> 00:10:46,249 It represents your dad. 209 00:10:46,283 --> 00:10:49,752 I was thinking you could scream at it or burn it or something. 210 00:10:49,787 --> 00:10:51,054 I'm not gonna do that. 211 00:10:51,088 --> 00:10:53,056 Snot, you need to process this! 212 00:10:53,090 --> 00:10:54,590 This is a big deal! 213 00:10:54,625 --> 00:10:56,159 Yeah, it's my big deal! 214 00:10:56,193 --> 00:10:58,027 And I am not gonna pretend to have 215 00:10:58,062 --> 00:11:00,596 some big theatrical reaction to this 216 00:11:00,631 --> 00:11:02,899 just to make you happy! 217 00:11:02,933 --> 00:11:04,934 But you should have some reaction. 218 00:11:04,968 --> 00:11:06,335 You have to feel something! 219 00:11:06,370 --> 00:11:07,804 He was your dad. 220 00:11:07,838 --> 00:11:09,338 And now he's gone. 221 00:11:10,374 --> 00:11:12,408 We're all gonna die, Steven! 222 00:11:12,443 --> 00:11:14,010 I'm gonna die! 223 00:11:14,044 --> 00:11:15,378 You're gonna die! 224 00:11:15,412 --> 00:11:17,914 Everyone dies! 225 00:11:17,948 --> 00:11:20,349 Do you really think any of this 226 00:11:20,384 --> 00:11:22,552 is going to last forever? 227 00:11:22,586 --> 00:11:24,153 'Cause it's not! 228 00:11:24,188 --> 00:11:26,556 Your dad's death is tearing us apart! 229 00:11:32,863 --> 00:11:36,399 We are all alone in the universe. 230 00:11:36,433 --> 00:11:37,633 We are not alone! 231 00:11:37,668 --> 00:11:39,202 We're in this together! 232 00:11:39,236 --> 00:11:43,239 We are born alone and we die alone. 233 00:11:43,273 --> 00:11:45,374 Why am I here? 234 00:11:46,410 --> 00:11:48,578 I don't know why I'm here. 235 00:11:48,612 --> 00:11:50,513 Wait a minute. Where's Toshi? 236 00:11:50,547 --> 00:11:51,948 Toshi? 237 00:11:51,982 --> 00:11:54,117 Tosh! 238 00:11:57,521 --> 00:11:59,021 Toshi! 239 00:11:59,056 --> 00:12:00,923 Toshi, where are you? 240 00:12:00,958 --> 00:12:02,825 Toshi, please come back! 241 00:12:02,860 --> 00:12:05,528 Toshi! 242 00:12:15,506 --> 00:12:18,541 It's so hot in this corn. 243 00:12:18,575 --> 00:12:20,476 I found him! 244 00:12:28,585 --> 00:12:30,219 What are you talking about? 245 00:12:35,192 --> 00:12:37,059 Please go. 246 00:12:51,842 --> 00:12:54,076 The secret to the "Piece of Cake" system 247 00:12:54,111 --> 00:12:56,112 is the real aluminum wire, 248 00:12:56,146 --> 00:12:58,147 which is spun to perfection in China. 249 00:12:58,182 --> 00:13:00,249 Where they know how to spin wire. 250 00:13:00,284 --> 00:13:01,918 This wire is safe to touch. 251 00:13:01,952 --> 00:13:03,920 You will not cut yourself on this wire. 252 00:13:03,954 --> 00:13:05,988 This wire retracts into the handles for easy storage. 253 00:13:06,023 --> 00:13:08,057 I could just go on and on about this wire, 254 00:13:08,091 --> 00:13:09,392 but the real proof is in the puddin', 255 00:13:09,426 --> 00:13:11,027 or the cake, as I should have said, 256 00:13:11,061 --> 00:13:12,695 because we are about to slice up some cake! 257 00:13:12,729 --> 00:13:13,763 I don't know about you, 258 00:13:13,797 --> 00:13:16,832 but I am glad I came to work today. 259 00:13:16,867 --> 00:13:18,534 Now, just watch this. Look at this. 260 00:13:18,569 --> 00:13:20,036 Watch and see how amazing this is. 261 00:13:20,070 --> 00:13:21,437 Look! Look! Look! Look! 262 00:13:21,471 --> 00:13:22,872 Look at this! Look at this! Look! 263 00:13:22,906 --> 00:13:25,641 Now, I've heard stories of people running this system 264 00:13:25,676 --> 00:13:29,278 under hot water and using it on ice-cream cake! 265 00:13:32,950 --> 00:13:35,084 We don't have time to dillydally, so we're just 266 00:13:35,118 --> 00:13:36,552 going to get a room, shower up, 267 00:13:36,587 --> 00:13:38,788 and then get right back on the road. 268 00:13:51,201 --> 00:13:52,602 Um, hi. 269 00:13:52,636 --> 00:13:54,837 Uh, can I help you with your cello? 270 00:13:54,871 --> 00:13:56,806 No. It's my suitcase. 271 00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:58,541 I just don't think all suitcases 272 00:13:58,575 --> 00:14:00,076 should be rectangles, you know? 273 00:14:00,110 --> 00:14:01,477 I think sometimes suitcases 274 00:14:01,511 --> 00:14:03,646 can be cello cases with clothes in them. 275 00:14:04,982 --> 00:14:06,482 What are you doing here? 276 00:14:06,516 --> 00:14:08,784 I'm traveling cross-country taking Polaroid pictures 277 00:14:08,819 --> 00:14:11,053 of people walking other people's dogs. 278 00:14:11,088 --> 00:14:12,455 It's pretty hard to tell, 279 00:14:12,489 --> 00:14:13,889 but I didn't become an artist 280 00:14:13,924 --> 00:14:15,558 because it was easy. 281 00:14:15,592 --> 00:14:16,926 You're amazing. 282 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:19,562 I'm actually a total dork. 283 00:14:19,596 --> 00:14:21,464 I got to get something to eat. 284 00:14:21,498 --> 00:14:23,299 I'm starving. 285 00:15:03,507 --> 00:15:08,678 Where were you?! Where were you?! 286 00:15:08,712 --> 00:15:10,279 Where were you?! 287 00:15:28,065 --> 00:15:29,465 Move. 288 00:15:29,499 --> 00:15:33,169 You can move that way or you can move that way, 289 00:15:33,203 --> 00:15:35,204 but you got to move. 290 00:15:39,343 --> 00:15:41,544 You're right. 291 00:15:41,578 --> 00:15:43,913 I've been frozen inside. 292 00:15:43,947 --> 00:15:45,314 Stuck. 293 00:15:45,349 --> 00:15:46,349 Now I understand 294 00:15:46,383 --> 00:15:48,317 what Steve was trying to do for me. 295 00:15:48,352 --> 00:15:50,519 I got to get to this funeral. 296 00:15:50,554 --> 00:15:52,521 I've got to move. 297 00:15:52,556 --> 00:15:53,889 Yes, move. 298 00:15:53,924 --> 00:15:55,358 I must clean. 299 00:15:55,392 --> 00:15:57,927 Frat boys poop all over room. 300 00:15:57,961 --> 00:16:00,129 And in the lobby! 301 00:16:00,163 --> 00:16:03,833 They only do this 'cause I Tri Delt. 302 00:16:08,023 --> 00:16:10,191 Yeah, so his dad is dead 303 00:16:10,225 --> 00:16:11,793 and we're heading to the funeral. 304 00:16:11,827 --> 00:16:13,261 It's rough, because his dad 305 00:16:13,295 --> 00:16:15,196 was never really there for him, so... 306 00:16:15,230 --> 00:16:17,432 you know, it's-it's rough. 307 00:16:17,466 --> 00:16:19,534 He's also pretty poor. 308 00:16:19,568 --> 00:16:21,135 Well, with a friend like you, 309 00:16:21,170 --> 00:16:23,538 he's got more than most. 310 00:16:26,575 --> 00:16:28,376 I'm gonna leave this picture 311 00:16:28,410 --> 00:16:29,877 at a gas station. 312 00:16:34,683 --> 00:16:35,917 Steve, I get it now. 313 00:16:35,951 --> 00:16:38,086 I get why I have to go to my dad's funeral. 314 00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:39,587 And I owe it all to you. 315 00:16:39,621 --> 00:16:40,688 That-that's great, buddy. 316 00:16:40,723 --> 00:16:42,390 And I want to talk all about it 317 00:16:42,424 --> 00:16:43,524 the minute you get back. 318 00:16:43,559 --> 00:16:45,560 Just you and me in the buddy closet. 319 00:16:45,594 --> 00:16:48,930 You're not going with me to my dad's funeral? 320 00:16:48,964 --> 00:16:51,499 I would love to, but-but this girl, 321 00:16:51,533 --> 00:16:54,268 this-this incredibly hard-to-define girl... 322 00:16:56,605 --> 00:16:58,005 I think she's the one. 323 00:16:58,040 --> 00:16:59,540 And that I would meet her now, 324 00:16:59,575 --> 00:17:01,376 while you're going through your thing... 325 00:17:01,410 --> 00:17:03,010 what wonderfully transformative time 326 00:17:03,045 --> 00:17:04,212 for both of us! 327 00:17:04,246 --> 00:17:05,279 But... 328 00:17:05,314 --> 00:17:06,781 Life. 329 00:17:06,815 --> 00:17:08,383 Am I right? 330 00:17:13,389 --> 00:17:15,456 I can't believe Steve bailed 331 00:17:15,491 --> 00:17:17,258 after everything we've been through. 332 00:17:17,292 --> 00:17:19,694 Thanks for being here for me, Barry. 333 00:17:19,728 --> 00:17:21,396 Hey, I just feel good 334 00:17:21,430 --> 00:17:23,431 taking you to your dad's funeral. 335 00:17:42,851 --> 00:17:45,987 I just realized I don't know your name. 336 00:17:46,021 --> 00:17:47,221 I could tell you my name, 337 00:17:47,256 --> 00:17:48,556 but would my name tell you 338 00:17:48,590 --> 00:17:50,992 that I'm incapable of seeing the color orange? 339 00:17:51,026 --> 00:17:53,828 I just have to trust people who give me these. 340 00:17:53,862 --> 00:17:57,131 Or that I think mustaches are T-shirts for lips? 341 00:17:57,166 --> 00:17:59,801 Or that I wear ice skates to weddings? 342 00:17:59,835 --> 00:18:01,569 It's hard to dance. 343 00:18:01,603 --> 00:18:04,071 But that's just the type of person I am. 344 00:18:06,542 --> 00:18:07,842 I'm Steve. 345 00:18:07,876 --> 00:18:09,544 I'm the kind of guy who drives cross-country 346 00:18:09,578 --> 00:18:11,612 to take his friend to his old man's funeral, 347 00:18:11,647 --> 00:18:13,448 then gives it all up when he finds 348 00:18:13,482 --> 00:18:16,217 his manic, pixie dream girl along the way. 349 00:18:16,251 --> 00:18:17,552 Wait a minute. 350 00:18:17,586 --> 00:18:19,153 You blew off your grieving friend 351 00:18:19,188 --> 00:18:22,023 to hang out in a hot tub with a complete stranger? 352 00:18:22,057 --> 00:18:23,024 No. 353 00:18:23,058 --> 00:18:24,625 No, you don't understand. 354 00:18:24,660 --> 00:18:26,761 I helped him get in touch with his sadness. 355 00:18:26,795 --> 00:18:29,730 I'm the only reason he even went to the funeral. 356 00:18:29,765 --> 00:18:31,799 Oh, I just figured you out. 357 00:18:31,834 --> 00:18:33,835 You're an emotional tourist. 358 00:18:36,705 --> 00:18:37,672 A what? 359 00:18:37,706 --> 00:18:38,940 You're the kind of person 360 00:18:38,974 --> 00:18:40,741 who feeds off other's experiences 361 00:18:40,776 --> 00:18:43,277 to fill the void inside of you. 362 00:18:43,312 --> 00:18:44,512 An emotional tourist. 363 00:18:44,546 --> 00:18:45,813 And I'm sorry, 364 00:18:45,848 --> 00:18:47,748 but that's not the trip I packed for. 365 00:19:10,038 --> 00:19:12,473 We're all searching. 366 00:19:12,508 --> 00:19:14,008 For something. 367 00:19:14,042 --> 00:19:16,043 Something that makes us feel alive. 368 00:19:21,049 --> 00:19:23,050 Something to connect us. 369 00:19:31,627 --> 00:19:33,628 To give our lives meaning. 370 00:19:37,766 --> 00:19:40,167 But sometimes when you're searching for something, 371 00:19:40,202 --> 00:19:42,703 the worst thing that can happen is... 372 00:19:42,738 --> 00:19:44,672 you find it. 373 00:19:48,110 --> 00:19:49,110 Well, we made it. 374 00:19:59,721 --> 00:20:02,189 So, now what? 375 00:20:02,224 --> 00:20:04,425 Just drive. 376 00:20:04,459 --> 00:20:07,228 A railroad gypsy took away my vas deferens, 377 00:20:07,262 --> 00:20:09,230 but you are bumming me out. 378 00:20:26,782 --> 00:20:28,916 I should have gotten out of the truck 379 00:20:28,951 --> 00:20:30,585 and given Snot a hug... 380 00:20:30,619 --> 00:20:32,219 but I couldn't face him. 381 00:20:32,254 --> 00:20:34,755 I chose a girl over my best friend. 382 00:20:34,790 --> 00:20:37,658 And it'll haunt me the rest of my life. 383 00:20:39,695 --> 00:20:42,897 I've seen a lot of strange things in my long life, 384 00:20:42,931 --> 00:20:44,398 in between the blinks, 385 00:20:44,433 --> 00:20:46,763 but that was definitely the weirdest kid 386 00:20:46,883 --> 00:20:48,901 I ever drove away from a funeral. 387 00:20:49,508 --> 00:20:51,440 And I'm usually up for anything. 388 00:20:51,772 --> 00:21:02,190 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com