1
00:00:23,553 --> 00:00:27,169
Oh, boy. Monday morning
chit-chat at the water cooler.
2
00:00:27,189 --> 00:00:29,918
The only reason to have done
stuff over the weekend.
3
00:00:29,957 --> 00:00:31,838
The only part of the
movie I didn't get is:
4
00:00:31,851 --> 00:00:34,958
now Radioactive Man gets
his powers from his suit?
5
00:00:34,971 --> 00:00:38,685
The suit is slowly killing him, but
if he doesn't wear it, he'll die.
6
00:00:38,713 --> 00:00:40,000
Oh...
7
00:00:40,020 --> 00:00:42,607
Wait, you guys saw the new
Radioactive Man sequel?
8
00:00:42,630 --> 00:00:44,370
Uh, it's not a sequel,
it's a reboot.
9
00:00:44,399 --> 00:00:46,367
Actually, this one
undoes the stuff
10
00:00:46,386 --> 00:00:48,679
from the last one,
so it's a de-boot.
11
00:00:48,692 --> 00:00:50,879
Stop talking!
I haven't seen it yet!
12
00:00:51,245 --> 00:00:53,809
Radioactive Man Re-Rises
came out three days ago.
13
00:00:53,822 --> 00:00:55,301
It is fair game.
14
00:00:55,314 --> 00:00:57,793
Yeah, if you haven't seen it, then
you gotta leave the water cooler.
15
00:00:57,812 --> 00:01:00,422
But what if I want
some cooled water?
16
00:01:00,975 --> 00:01:02,189
You should have thought of that
17
00:01:02,209 --> 00:01:04,096
when you were not
seeing the movie.
18
00:01:04,118 --> 00:01:06,025
Fine.
I'll drink alone.
19
00:01:07,514 --> 00:01:10,514
♪ The Simpsons 25x09 ♪
Steal This Episode
Original Air Date on January 5, 2014
20
00:01:10,525 --> 00:01:13,025
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
Resync for WEB-DL by Norther
21
00:01:13,745 --> 00:01:16,152
It was so awesome
when Radioactive Man
22
00:01:16,158 --> 00:01:17,865
had to erase his own memory.
23
00:01:17,885 --> 00:01:20,052
Yeah, so he wouldn't be
tortured by his past
24
00:01:20,058 --> 00:01:21,585
when he was born in the future.
25
00:01:21,615 --> 00:01:23,848
Oh, they're talking
about the movie!
26
00:01:23,857 --> 00:01:25,957
Hurry up, you idiot!
27
00:01:26,033 --> 00:01:27,607
No, no, don't stop!
28
00:01:27,633 --> 00:01:29,020
I'm sorry I got mad.
29
00:01:29,109 --> 00:01:30,948
I'll do that thing you like.
30
00:01:33,314 --> 00:01:35,579
I got Radioactive Man's
new villain...
31
00:01:35,597 --> 00:01:37,032
the Collider.
32
00:01:37,058 --> 00:01:39,699
I turn out to be a good guy.
33
00:01:40,788 --> 00:01:44,182
I die, but come back
to life after the credits.
34
00:01:44,201 --> 00:01:45,569
Oh!
35
00:01:47,075 --> 00:01:51,155
Sometimes we feel there's
nowhere left to turn,
36
00:01:51,179 --> 00:01:52,884
much like Radioactive Man,
37
00:01:52,904 --> 00:01:55,423
when he had to kill his
own antimatter twin
38
00:01:55,437 --> 00:01:57,729
- with a blast of time particles from
the Chrono-cube... - ♪ Amazing grace
39
00:01:57,745 --> 00:01:59,696
- ♪ How loud I sing
- ...and in doing so, mortally wounding...
40
00:01:59,708 --> 00:02:03,248
- ♪ To drown the spoilers out! - ...his
girlfriend, who was pregnant with his own...
41
00:02:03,271 --> 00:02:05,704
♪ Shut up, shut up,
shut... ♪
42
00:02:06,904 --> 00:02:08,969
And stay out!
43
00:02:09,808 --> 00:02:12,555
Okay. I gotta go see the
Radioactive Man movie
44
00:02:12,575 --> 00:02:14,636
before it gets
totally ruined for me.
45
00:02:14,657 --> 00:02:16,032
Ooh, date night!
46
00:02:16,064 --> 00:02:17,913
I'll go change my bra.
47
00:02:18,480 --> 00:02:20,548
I want to see
Radioactive Man Re-Rises.
48
00:02:20,568 --> 00:02:22,355
If Bart's going, I'm going!
49
00:02:22,365 --> 00:02:24,707
If Grampa's going, I'm going!
50
00:02:24,726 --> 00:02:27,582
If you all go, then I have
to pay for a babysitter.
51
00:02:27,609 --> 00:02:31,382
We'll call that nice girl who's getting
her Masters in Child Development.
52
00:02:31,399 --> 00:02:33,949
Emily-Beth? We can't
afford Emily-Beth!
53
00:02:33,975 --> 00:02:35,735
She brings her own puppets!
54
00:02:38,093 --> 00:02:39,630
Bye-bye, Maggie!
55
00:02:39,655 --> 00:02:41,329
Bye-bye, money.
56
00:02:43,018 --> 00:02:44,545
Two adults, two kids,
57
00:02:44,573 --> 00:02:47,486
and one senior with the mind of
a baby so he should be free.
58
00:02:47,515 --> 00:02:50,384
For the 3-D show,
that'll be $72.
59
00:02:50,411 --> 00:02:52,668
- What?!
- Or, for ten dollars more,
60
00:02:52,687 --> 00:02:57,569
you can see it in IMAX Hobbit Frame
Rate Virtual Reality Vision.
61
00:03:04,705 --> 00:03:07,236
All right, movie, you
better be worth it.
62
00:03:22,249 --> 00:03:24,776
The motorcycle dudes are chicks!
63
00:03:24,799 --> 00:03:26,695
I wonder what else is chicks?
64
00:03:37,560 --> 00:03:38,670
Don't ask.
65
00:03:38,687 --> 00:03:39,992
Do smell.
66
00:03:40,005 --> 00:03:43,382
Also available in "Arctic Slut,"
"Morning After Melon" and "Elon Musk."
67
00:03:43,392 --> 00:03:45,300
Hey... they tricked us!
68
00:03:45,313 --> 00:03:46,573
That's a commercial!
69
00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:48,936
If I wanted to pay for
commercials I can't skip,
70
00:03:48,943 --> 00:03:50,656
I'd sign up for Hulu Plus!
71
00:03:50,686 --> 00:03:51,473
Shh!
72
00:03:51,500 --> 00:03:52,973
You're shushing me?
73
00:03:53,001 --> 00:03:56,568
This guy's on his cell phone,
she's texting, he's sexting,
74
00:03:56,592 --> 00:03:59,513
and that guy brought a
baby to a 9:00 movie!
75
00:03:59,528 --> 00:04:01,362
That's negative, man.
76
00:04:01,375 --> 00:04:03,341
What happened to the movies?
77
00:04:03,352 --> 00:04:06,492
First they got worse
than TV, and now this!
78
00:04:10,752 --> 00:04:12,662
And stay out!
79
00:04:14,469 --> 00:04:17,764
Chins up, Homer. You don't need
a theater to watch the movie.
80
00:04:17,786 --> 00:04:20,253
You just have to
illegally download it.
81
00:04:20,275 --> 00:04:21,966
Illegally download it?
82
00:04:22,003 --> 00:04:22,976
Is that legal?
83
00:04:22,991 --> 00:04:24,817
Who knows?
But it sure is easy.
84
00:04:24,830 --> 00:04:27,106
I'll walk you through it.
All you have to do is...
85
00:04:27,126 --> 00:04:29,852
The FOX network forbids the broadcast
of step-by-step instructions
86
00:04:29,865 --> 00:04:32,292
for illegally downloading
copyrighted intellectual property.
87
00:04:32,312 --> 00:04:33,785
In the meantime, please
enjoy this footage
88
00:04:33,799 --> 00:04:35,892
from NASCAR's 2011
Martinsville Cup.
89
00:04:41,056 --> 00:04:42,640
Wow, that was easy.
90
00:04:42,664 --> 00:04:44,632
All I had to do was click on...
91
00:04:47,575 --> 00:04:48,914
And play!
92
00:04:53,435 --> 00:04:54,875
Bless you, boy.
93
00:04:54,903 --> 00:04:57,618
That was the greatest thing
I've seen on a computer
94
00:04:57,631 --> 00:05:00,097
that I can talk about
with you in the room.
95
00:05:00,128 --> 00:05:01,695
How did you know
how to do that?
96
00:05:01,723 --> 00:05:03,066
I'm under 30.
97
00:05:03,090 --> 00:05:05,498
Guys, guys, I saw the
Radioactive Man movie!
98
00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:07,467
Here's my ten favorite
scenes from worst to best.
99
00:05:07,488 --> 00:05:10,501
Number ten: when what's-his-name
did that stuff with those dudes.
100
00:05:10,507 --> 00:05:12,700
- Number nine... - Uh, Homer,
that movie's been talked out.
101
00:05:12,720 --> 00:05:14,789
We're discussing the
new James Bond flick.
102
00:05:14,816 --> 00:05:16,816
I like that James
Bond is ugly now.
103
00:05:16,838 --> 00:05:18,785
I like that he doesn't
have any gadgets.
104
00:05:18,813 --> 00:05:20,211
I like that he's not
good at shooting,
105
00:05:20,236 --> 00:05:22,761
doesn't say funny quips,
or do any James Bond stuff.
106
00:05:22,780 --> 00:05:24,233
Shut up, shut up, shut up!
107
00:05:24,259 --> 00:05:25,932
Homer, go to the theater
and see the movie.
108
00:05:26,388 --> 00:05:27,320
Theaters?
109
00:05:27,333 --> 00:05:29,026
All I need to see this movie
110
00:05:29,045 --> 00:05:31,842
is a laptop and a Web site
based in a country
111
00:05:31,855 --> 00:05:34,740
that's really just
an offshore oil platform.
112
00:05:34,756 --> 00:05:35,969
Care to join me?
113
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:41,680
That was so much better
than the cinema.
114
00:05:41,702 --> 00:05:45,049
It mixes the wonder of movie-going
with the rush of stealing.
115
00:05:45,072 --> 00:05:47,921
All we want is brand-new,
big budget entertainment
116
00:05:47,943 --> 00:05:49,372
in our homes for nothin'.
117
00:05:49,385 --> 00:05:51,354
Why doesn't Hollywood get that?
118
00:05:51,553 --> 00:05:55,689
Gentlemen, I am inspired to create
a theater for the people...
119
00:05:55,703 --> 00:05:58,174
an experience free of
all the nuisances
120
00:05:58,180 --> 00:06:01,067
and gouging of
modern-day moviegoing!
121
00:06:01,089 --> 00:06:03,664
Yeah, no more jerks talking
on their cell phones!
122
00:06:03,678 --> 00:06:06,308
No more jerks telling me not
to talk on my cell phone!
123
00:06:06,314 --> 00:06:07,771
And best of all...
124
00:06:07,795 --> 00:06:12,033
we'll never have to sit through
another annoying commercial again!
125
00:06:18,174 --> 00:06:21,290
Welcome to
"Cinema Pirate-diso."
126
00:06:21,319 --> 00:06:23,532
Tonight's movie is
Life is Funny,
127
00:06:23,554 --> 00:06:25,408
directed by Judd Apatow.
128
00:06:25,415 --> 00:06:29,493
It's based on his life, starring his
family and ad-libbed by his friends.
129
00:06:29,513 --> 00:06:32,778
So for the next three
and a half hours, enjoy!
130
00:06:36,093 --> 00:06:39,113
Did you just pass gas while
we were making love?
131
00:06:39,128 --> 00:06:41,986
You're the one who hired
the Korean taco truck
132
00:06:42,006 --> 00:06:44,226
for our private
school fund-raiser.
133
00:06:45,436 --> 00:06:47,209
I live it, he writes it.
134
00:06:52,710 --> 00:06:54,263
Well, what did you think?
135
00:06:54,285 --> 00:06:56,545
We may be going to Hell
for seeing "side bosom,"
136
00:06:56,561 --> 00:06:58,960
but this backyard is
a little slice of Heaven,
137
00:06:58,979 --> 00:07:00,486
all thanks to Homer Simpson!
138
00:07:02,366 --> 00:07:03,373
This is fun!
139
00:07:03,394 --> 00:07:07,106
And it was so nice of the movie
company to let you show their film.
140
00:07:07,123 --> 00:07:09,163
Let me?
Uh, sweetheart,
141
00:07:09,187 --> 00:07:12,054
I downloaded it off
the Internet...
142
00:07:12,070 --> 00:07:13,710
illegally.
143
00:07:13,732 --> 00:07:15,885
An illegal download?
144
00:07:15,913 --> 00:07:19,207
But Hollywood says stealing
from Hollywood is wrong.
145
00:07:19,894 --> 00:07:23,155
Why should a regular guy like me
have to spend 15 bucks a ticket
146
00:07:23,174 --> 00:07:25,443
so studios can pay
huge salaries
147
00:07:25,463 --> 00:07:28,932
to the Air Buds and Ray
Liottas of the world?
148
00:07:28,951 --> 00:07:29,832
Oh!
149
00:07:31,395 --> 00:07:33,554
When I watched
that pirated movie,
150
00:07:33,574 --> 00:07:35,478
I was stealing with my eyes.
151
00:07:35,499 --> 00:07:38,106
So I'm repaying the good
people in Hollywood
152
00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:40,329
for the ticket I
should have bought.
153
00:07:40,349 --> 00:07:43,882
Now this money will end up in the
hands of the talented people
154
00:07:43,902 --> 00:07:47,317
who make magic happen
on the silver screen.
155
00:07:54,222 --> 00:07:55,509
Ah...
156
00:07:59,384 --> 00:08:01,424
Karen, get me the FBI!
157
00:08:01,451 --> 00:08:02,593
Karen!
158
00:08:15,159 --> 00:08:17,701
You people joined this
squad for one reason:
159
00:08:17,734 --> 00:08:19,381
to fight movie pirates.
160
00:08:19,407 --> 00:08:21,154
I wanted to catch
serial killers.
161
00:08:21,172 --> 00:08:23,112
"I wanted to catch
serial killers."
162
00:08:23,114 --> 00:08:24,867
From now on, you will
lay down your lives
163
00:08:24,885 --> 00:08:27,200
to protect America's
chick flicks, buddy comedies
164
00:08:27,218 --> 00:08:30,421
and steady stream
of animated misfires.
165
00:08:30,740 --> 00:08:32,736
Sir, you have to see this.
166
00:08:33,311 --> 00:08:34,511
"Took it off the Web...
167
00:08:34,532 --> 00:08:35,879
"watched for free...
168
00:08:35,900 --> 00:08:37,740
never pay for a movie again"?
169
00:08:37,981 --> 00:08:40,301
Men, set your guns on "kill."
170
00:08:40,328 --> 00:08:42,751
We're going after Homer Simpson.
171
00:08:42,919 --> 00:08:46,424
I now present, direct from the
computer of an angry editor
172
00:08:46,443 --> 00:08:48,114
at a special effects house,
173
00:08:48,132 --> 00:08:51,234
Cosmic Wars Episode Seven.
174
00:09:02,840 --> 00:09:06,108
My childhood has been un-ruined!
175
00:09:18,134 --> 00:09:19,474
Listen up, seat meat!
176
00:09:19,504 --> 00:09:23,472
You are all in violation of Title
17 of the U.S. Copyright Code.
177
00:09:24,569 --> 00:09:26,156
Easy there, hotshot.
178
00:09:26,171 --> 00:09:28,759
All the people are doing
is watching a movie.
179
00:09:28,806 --> 00:09:30,726
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
180
00:09:30,741 --> 00:09:34,788
I'm not wearing an undershirt and
my badge is poking into my skin.
181
00:09:34,818 --> 00:09:36,031
What's going on here?
182
00:09:36,052 --> 00:09:37,987
Is there a fondler
in the neighborhood?
183
00:09:38,002 --> 00:09:41,157
I'm here to arrest and hopefully
stage the prison suicide
184
00:09:41,170 --> 00:09:43,290
of the mastermind of
this operation--
185
00:09:43,314 --> 00:09:44,534
Homer Simpson!
186
00:09:44,540 --> 00:09:46,417
Ooh, mastermind.
187
00:09:46,450 --> 00:09:51,535
We got our man, thanks to a tip
from a heroic American snitch.
188
00:09:52,265 --> 00:09:54,265
One of you turned me in?
189
00:09:54,284 --> 00:09:55,804
Who was it?
190
00:09:57,161 --> 00:09:58,328
You!
191
00:09:59,277 --> 00:10:01,118
Superintendent Chalmers,
192
00:10:01,131 --> 00:10:02,727
you never forgave
me for that time
193
00:10:02,740 --> 00:10:05,386
we wore the same Hawaiian
shirt to that luau!
194
00:10:06,745 --> 00:10:08,222
They're gonna take Dad!
195
00:10:08,245 --> 00:10:10,510
- We gotta do something!
- I'm on it.
196
00:10:17,891 --> 00:10:19,598
Copyrighted material!
197
00:10:19,624 --> 00:10:20,905
Don't look at it!
198
00:10:20,925 --> 00:10:22,659
Someone sell me a ticket!
199
00:10:22,679 --> 00:10:24,371
Ear plugs in!
Blinders on!
200
00:10:24,395 --> 00:10:26,083
We trained for this!
201
00:10:42,793 --> 00:10:45,280
From now on, the only place
you'll be watching movies
202
00:10:45,296 --> 00:10:47,706
without having to buy
a ticket is jail.
203
00:10:48,125 --> 00:10:49,813
Oh... oh...
204
00:10:51,714 --> 00:10:55,088
Baby, promise me you'll
find out who turned me in.
205
00:10:56,054 --> 00:10:58,587
It's probably someone I
would never suspect.
206
00:10:58,616 --> 00:11:00,209
Never suspect.
207
00:11:01,918 --> 00:11:04,387
Your moans of sympathy
are all I have.
208
00:11:04,408 --> 00:11:06,490
Oh...
209
00:11:06,511 --> 00:11:11,205
Whoever did this to me will be
haunted by unbearable guilt forever!
210
00:11:11,881 --> 00:11:13,252
Forever!
211
00:11:21,264 --> 00:11:23,044
What are you guys in for?
212
00:11:23,076 --> 00:11:24,444
Bank robbery.
213
00:11:24,462 --> 00:11:25,803
Drug trafficking.
214
00:11:25,823 --> 00:11:27,897
- What about you?
- Movie piracy.
215
00:11:28,058 --> 00:11:29,151
What?!
216
00:11:29,173 --> 00:11:32,020
People in show business work
hard to make those movies.
217
00:11:32,036 --> 00:11:36,277
My media stocks under-performed
because of people like you.
218
00:11:36,447 --> 00:11:38,717
My brother lost his job
as a grip
219
00:11:38,736 --> 00:11:41,100
on a movie set
because of piracy.
220
00:11:41,118 --> 00:11:43,069
He had to sell his Jet Ski.
221
00:11:43,094 --> 00:11:46,447
A grip without a Jet Ski
ain't no grip at all!
222
00:11:51,348 --> 00:11:55,529
You're about to find out what
we do to copyright infringers.
223
00:12:07,027 --> 00:12:08,793
Uh... huh?
224
00:12:09,198 --> 00:12:10,340
Huh...?
225
00:12:24,949 --> 00:12:26,145
Whoo-hoo!
226
00:12:36,573 --> 00:12:38,491
It's almost like
having Dad here.
227
00:12:38,510 --> 00:12:41,125
Only with less growling
when I go near his food.
228
00:12:41,144 --> 00:12:43,603
I just want to know who
dropped the dime on Dad.
229
00:12:43,632 --> 00:12:44,785
Lousy rat.
230
00:12:44,807 --> 00:12:47,767
Maybe the person that
turned your father in
231
00:12:47,774 --> 00:12:49,994
thought they were doing
the right thing.
232
00:12:50,020 --> 00:12:51,684
Homer just pirated a movie.
233
00:12:51,703 --> 00:12:53,741
But it's not the worst thing
Dad ever did.
234
00:12:53,756 --> 00:12:56,342
It's not even the worst kind
of pirate Dad's ever been.
235
00:12:56,365 --> 00:12:59,832
Lisa, tell your brother that
stealing is wrong, no matter what.
236
00:12:59,858 --> 00:13:03,178
I don't know. It wasn't like
Dad was stealing for himself.
237
00:13:03,205 --> 00:13:06,338
He created this wonderful
experience for the whole town.
238
00:13:06,365 --> 00:13:09,171
I just can't imagine
anyone turning him in.
239
00:13:14,495 --> 00:13:17,256
- Dad, Dad, you're back, you're back!
- Hey! - Dad, you're back! Dad!
240
00:13:17,275 --> 00:13:19,882
Homer, what are you
doing out of prison?
241
00:13:19,902 --> 00:13:21,970
You have to go back
and give yourself up.
242
00:13:21,998 --> 00:13:24,205
I can't go back to jail!
243
00:13:24,218 --> 00:13:27,216
There's no shampoo, just soap!
244
00:13:27,256 --> 00:13:29,765
Wait, I know one
place in Springfield
245
00:13:29,778 --> 00:13:32,788
that doesn't care about
Internet piracy laws.
246
00:13:36,112 --> 00:13:37,693
Thanks for taking us in.
247
00:13:37,712 --> 00:13:40,458
Our family always
appreciates asylum.
248
00:13:40,985 --> 00:13:44,084
This consulate is like
being on Swedish soil.
249
00:13:44,103 --> 00:13:46,995
You're as safe here as you
would be in the Skatteskrapan.
250
00:13:48,251 --> 00:13:52,271
Your country doesn't think illegally
downloading movies is wrong?
251
00:13:52,290 --> 00:13:55,777
The people of Sweden believe all
movies should be shared freely.
252
00:13:55,811 --> 00:13:57,644
How is that not stealing?
253
00:13:57,670 --> 00:14:01,064
Bah, your Hollywood studios
are the real thieves,
254
00:14:01,084 --> 00:14:03,951
claiming all their hit
movies have lost money.
255
00:14:04,132 --> 00:14:06,292
I spit on their bookkeeping.
256
00:14:06,316 --> 00:14:09,129
Yeah, and why don't they
make a sequel to Taken
257
00:14:09,158 --> 00:14:11,085
where The Hangover
guys get taken
258
00:14:11,107 --> 00:14:14,317
and the only ones that could
rescue them is Fast and Furious.
259
00:14:14,336 --> 00:14:17,280
Aw, man, I would
love to pirate that.
260
00:14:17,293 --> 00:14:20,347
As would the proud
people of Sweden.
261
00:14:26,049 --> 00:14:27,536
They've found us!
262
00:14:27,556 --> 00:14:31,586
There's only one surefire way to get
fugitives out of a foreign building--
263
00:14:31,619 --> 00:14:33,237
blasting death metal.
264
00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:37,131
♪ Respecting the law,
respecting the law ♪
265
00:14:37,150 --> 00:14:40,228
♪ Copyright law,
copyright law ♪
266
00:14:40,255 --> 00:14:41,967
♪ Copyright law,
copyright law... ♪
267
00:14:42,491 --> 00:14:44,471
You like this?
268
00:14:44,491 --> 00:14:47,035
Oh-oh, Swedes love death metal.
269
00:14:47,055 --> 00:14:49,302
It reminds us of death.
270
00:14:50,631 --> 00:14:53,437
Damn those Peace
Prize-giving fish-smokers.
271
00:14:56,056 --> 00:14:59,254
I'm so tired of being
trapped in this embassy.
272
00:14:59,281 --> 00:15:00,387
Consulate.
273
00:15:00,409 --> 00:15:04,315
Consulates are regional offices, which
serve the embassy in the capitol.
274
00:15:06,041 --> 00:15:08,915
Thank you so much for sticking
with me through all this.
275
00:15:08,944 --> 00:15:11,274
You're the greatest
wife in the world.
276
00:15:13,501 --> 00:15:14,821
It was me!
277
00:15:14,834 --> 00:15:17,112
I was the one who told the FBI.
278
00:15:19,082 --> 00:15:20,074
You?
279
00:15:20,102 --> 00:15:21,195
How could you?
280
00:15:21,224 --> 00:15:22,994
You're my own flesh and blood.
281
00:15:23,014 --> 00:15:26,221
I was just trying to
do the right thing.
282
00:15:26,261 --> 00:15:27,774
Who would've thought
the authorities
283
00:15:27,783 --> 00:15:30,230
would use a confession
against me?
284
00:15:30,259 --> 00:15:33,265
Have you forgotten what you
promised at our wedding?
285
00:15:33,283 --> 00:15:34,923
To love and cherish?
286
00:15:34,944 --> 00:15:36,416
To aid and abet?
287
00:15:36,446 --> 00:15:39,106
I never wanted to
say funny vows.
288
00:15:39,122 --> 00:15:41,328
Well, you did!
And they got laughs.
289
00:15:41,410 --> 00:15:42,757
Solid laughs!
290
00:15:42,798 --> 00:15:44,685
I didn't mean for
this to happen,
291
00:15:44,700 --> 00:15:46,660
but you were stealing.
292
00:15:46,675 --> 00:15:49,582
All I ever had was you
looking out for me.
293
00:15:49,604 --> 00:15:51,432
I got nothing now.
294
00:16:22,565 --> 00:16:26,086
All rise in the matter of
The People vs. Homer Simpson.
295
00:16:26,102 --> 00:16:29,564
The people call Hollywood
ultra-producer, Judd Apatow.
296
00:16:29,585 --> 00:16:32,120
Homer Simpson is
an enemy of art.
297
00:16:32,133 --> 00:16:34,427
Art created by writers,
directors,
298
00:16:34,444 --> 00:16:37,958
and the guy who uses a computer
to erase or enhance nipples.
299
00:16:37,987 --> 00:16:40,466
And not just the people
who dream for a living,
300
00:16:40,483 --> 00:16:42,451
but the people
who depend on us.
301
00:16:42,491 --> 00:16:44,291
The spin class instructors,
302
00:16:44,311 --> 00:16:46,793
the personal rabbis, Seth Rogen.
303
00:16:50,592 --> 00:16:52,725
It's true, I need him.
304
00:16:52,748 --> 00:16:55,445
I saw a bootleg DVD of
The 40 Year Old Virgin
305
00:16:55,465 --> 00:16:57,080
for sale at a car wash.
306
00:16:57,100 --> 00:17:00,040
They left off my
director's commentary!
307
00:17:00,056 --> 00:17:02,201
It didn't even have
a blooper reel!
308
00:17:04,973 --> 00:17:06,877
Homer Simpson, you
have been found guilty
309
00:17:06,897 --> 00:17:10,357
of illegal reproduction and
distribution of copyrighted material.
310
00:17:10,379 --> 00:17:12,992
Before sentencing, do you have
anything to say for yourself?
311
00:17:13,002 --> 00:17:13,857
No.
312
00:17:13,870 --> 00:17:16,910
Homer, tell them your
side of the story.
313
00:17:16,939 --> 00:17:20,428
I know I hurt you, but
please trust me now.
314
00:17:20,454 --> 00:17:21,715
It'll work.
315
00:17:23,251 --> 00:17:24,956
You know what, Judge Apatow?
316
00:17:24,976 --> 00:17:26,895
I do have something to say.
317
00:17:26,916 --> 00:17:29,523
These movie people
may say I'm a pirate,
318
00:17:29,545 --> 00:17:31,045
but I'm just a man.
319
00:17:31,060 --> 00:17:33,561
A man who loved
Hollywood too much.
320
00:17:33,582 --> 00:17:36,380
So I made my own rules
and fought the big guys
321
00:17:36,399 --> 00:17:38,863
who tried to destroy
my way of life.
322
00:17:38,888 --> 00:17:40,448
He doesn't sound like a villain.
323
00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:44,134
- He sounds like a classic underdog.
- He's the unlikeliest of heroes!
324
00:17:44,151 --> 00:17:45,918
But where's the love story?
325
00:17:45,941 --> 00:17:47,808
At first my wife
didn't believe in me.
326
00:17:47,837 --> 00:17:51,292
Maybe we forgot why we fell
in love in the first place.
327
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:54,329
But when times seemed
darkest, one minute ago,
328
00:17:54,342 --> 00:17:57,657
she was there and gave me
the strength and courage
329
00:17:57,679 --> 00:17:59,930
to fight for what I believe in.
330
00:18:00,976 --> 00:18:03,900
He's a downloading David
versus a greedy Goliath.
331
00:18:03,913 --> 00:18:06,899
An Erin Brockovich
but with more cleavage!
332
00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:10,847
Two, three... Good Lord, he's
hitting all four quadrants!
333
00:18:11,367 --> 00:18:14,736
One family, against all
odds, took on the system...
334
00:18:14,763 --> 00:18:16,517
and lost.
335
00:18:18,120 --> 00:18:20,595
Mr. Simpson, I'd like to buy
the rights to make a movie
336
00:18:20,615 --> 00:18:22,048
based on your true story.
337
00:18:22,071 --> 00:18:23,604
I'm attached as
executive producer!
338
00:18:23,626 --> 00:18:24,851
Attached! Attached!
339
00:18:24,864 --> 00:18:27,892
One movie?
We envision a trilogy.
340
00:18:27,916 --> 00:18:30,149
Will Smith's family wants
to play your family.
341
00:18:30,170 --> 00:18:31,410
I'd be Jaden.
342
00:18:33,881 --> 00:18:35,560
On behalf of Hollywood,
343
00:18:35,585 --> 00:18:37,871
we are dropping all charges.
344
00:18:39,325 --> 00:18:40,687
These people hate my dad.
345
00:18:40,700 --> 00:18:43,027
How can they want to
make a movie about him?
346
00:18:43,052 --> 00:18:45,325
Hollywood may be run
by big corporations
347
00:18:45,341 --> 00:18:47,771
trying to squash people,
but they make movies
348
00:18:47,791 --> 00:18:49,919
about people standing up
to big corporations
349
00:18:49,933 --> 00:18:52,226
trying to squash
them and winning.
350
00:18:52,634 --> 00:18:55,451
I'll sign with whoever can
convince Channing Tatum
351
00:18:55,471 --> 00:18:57,877
to gain the most
weight to play me.
352
00:19:04,491 --> 00:19:06,767
- Surprise! - Surprise!
- Surprise!
353
00:19:06,782 --> 00:19:08,189
What the hell is all this?
354
00:19:08,211 --> 00:19:09,818
We're so excited
about your movie
355
00:19:09,824 --> 00:19:11,485
that we're having
a special screening.
356
00:19:11,506 --> 00:19:14,061
But the movie isn't in
theaters till next week.
357
00:19:14,070 --> 00:19:17,583
Yeah, we ripped a version off Bootleg
Bay just like you taught us.
358
00:19:17,589 --> 00:19:21,496
It's still got timecode on it,
but, otherwise, it's a clean copy.
359
00:19:22,838 --> 00:19:25,218
You're pirating my movie?
360
00:19:25,225 --> 00:19:28,150
The hell you are!
Piracy is stealing!
361
00:19:28,177 --> 00:19:31,172
You're taking money out
of my family's mouths!
362
00:19:32,227 --> 00:19:35,411
But the movie is... i-it's
about you pirating movies.
363
00:19:35,444 --> 00:19:37,451
Oh, that's Hollywood fantasy.
364
00:19:37,473 --> 00:19:41,306
We live in the real world, where
I have something called...
365
00:19:41,324 --> 00:19:44,344
prof-it par-tic-i-pa-tion.
366
00:19:44,366 --> 00:19:46,363
That's negative, man.
367
00:19:46,395 --> 00:19:47,956
Oh, Homie...
368
00:19:47,977 --> 00:19:52,480
Now all of you go see my movie
in the theater the day it opens!
369
00:19:52,493 --> 00:19:54,521
No bargain matinees!
370
00:19:54,543 --> 00:19:56,483
And tell your friends
it was great!
371
00:19:56,512 --> 00:19:59,685
Buy the stuff they advertise
in the commercials before it!
372
00:19:59,707 --> 00:20:04,334
Homer in the movie wears Ask
Body Spray and so should you!
373
00:20:04,353 --> 00:20:06,754
Don't ask! Do smell!
374
00:20:06,782 --> 00:20:08,656
Homie, do you really
think you should be...
375
00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:09,709
Up-bup-bup-bup-bup!
376
00:20:09,729 --> 00:20:13,058
What have we learned about not
blindly supporting our husband?
377
00:20:13,335 --> 00:20:15,713
Ask Body Spray!
378
00:20:17,666 --> 00:20:22,666
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
Resync for WEB-DL by Norther
379
00:20:31,404 --> 00:20:33,269
But then when times
seemed darkest,
380
00:20:33,295 --> 00:20:36,004
she was there; she gave me
the strength and courage
381
00:20:36,017 --> 00:20:38,062
to fight for what I believe in.
382
00:20:38,479 --> 00:20:40,115
On behalf of Hollywood,
383
00:20:40,134 --> 00:20:42,708
we're dropping all charges!
384
00:20:48,916 --> 00:20:51,204
So what do you think, Lise?
Who are the good guys here,
385
00:20:51,217 --> 00:20:53,792
the media companies or
the Internet freedom guys?
386
00:20:53,814 --> 00:20:56,449
Well, both groups claim
their intentions are noble,
387
00:20:56,462 --> 00:20:57,875
but at the end of the day,
388
00:20:57,900 --> 00:21:00,614
they're both trying to steal
as much money as they can.
389
00:21:00,628 --> 00:21:02,863
So... everyone's a pirate?
390
00:21:02,877 --> 00:21:04,904
And the worst one of all is...
391
00:21:49,250 --> 00:21:50,492
Shh!