1
00:00:00,791 --> 00:00:03,560
All right, madam, you've
sent back the peas, carrots,

2
00:00:03,594 --> 00:00:06,816
and even the chef's special,
peas and carrots.

3
00:00:07,836 --> 00:00:09,165
That's right.

4
00:00:09,166 --> 00:00:12,398
Now I hate to say this to my customers,
but you're kind of being a baby.

5
00:00:13,939 --> 00:00:15,807
Hey, will you two
keep it down?

6
00:00:15,808 --> 00:00:18,843
Danny Wheeler is officially
on sale at the NHL store.

7
00:00:18,877 --> 00:00:21,646
Dude, this is the tenth time
you've called. Have you no dignity?

8
00:00:21,681 --> 00:00:25,192
I'm dignified.
<i>Bonjour, monsieur.</i>

9
00:00:25,985 --> 00:00:28,012
I am <i>zee</i> French tourist.

10
00:00:28,013 --> 00:00:30,922
Do you have <i>zee</i> Danny Veeler
jersey in <i>stockee?</i>

11
00:00:32,658 --> 00:00:34,075
Sure, I'll hold.

12
00:00:34,708 --> 00:00:39,146
Okay. Does this suit say strong,
successful TV producer?

13
00:00:39,147 --> 00:00:41,726
Yeah, it does.
So why are you wearing it?

14
00:00:42,702 --> 00:00:45,737
Because I am only
one great idea away

15
00:00:45,771 --> 00:00:48,807
from being bumped up to producer
on "The Mary Hart Show."

16
00:00:48,841 --> 00:00:51,543
Look, yesterday,
I was walking down the hall.

17
00:00:51,577 --> 00:00:55,587
Mary came out of her dressing room,
stopped, looked straight at me.

18
00:00:55,588 --> 00:00:58,248
- What'd she say?
- Nothing. She just kept walking to set.

19
00:00:59,287 --> 00:01:01,820
But the point
is she stopped.

20
00:01:02,564 --> 00:01:04,735
Dude, I'm a Mary-stopper.

21
00:01:05,909 --> 00:01:07,801
Yes, I'm still here.

22
00:01:08,535 --> 00:01:13,048
Really? That's awesome!
I mean, <i>zhat's awesome!</i>

23
00:01:13,499 --> 00:01:15,038
My jersey's sold out!

24
00:01:15,039 --> 00:01:18,823
Coming through! Pay no attention
to the ass in your doorway.

25
00:01:18,824 --> 00:01:21,442
Mom! Mom, I have fans,
real fans.

26
00:01:21,443 --> 00:01:24,195
Yeah, well, could you turn them on?
I'm sweating through my good bra.

27
00:01:24,197 --> 00:01:26,683
No, no, no.
My jersey is sold out.

28
00:01:26,684 --> 00:01:28,735
Ah, I got to tell Riley.

29
00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:31,615
What's up
with the old bag?

30
00:01:34,420 --> 00:01:37,722
I am of course
referring to the duffel.

31
00:01:38,226 --> 00:01:41,161
Tucker, you look adorable.

32
00:01:41,179 --> 00:01:43,964
Your school pictures
are gonna turn out great.

33
00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:51,301
Riley's not answering.

34
00:01:51,335 --> 00:01:53,269
Damn it, Ben.
I knew it.

35
00:01:53,304 --> 00:01:55,394
I knew you were gonna
mess things up with her.

36
00:01:55,395 --> 00:01:57,396
I'm just like
that psychic on the corner,

37
00:01:57,414 --> 00:02:00,282
except I wear pants and I'm not
married to the fire hydrant.

38
00:02:01,195 --> 00:02:03,502
- I'm gonna go check on her.
- Hey, what about me?

39
00:02:03,503 --> 00:02:05,237
'Cause nobody's asking
if I'm okay.

40
00:02:05,238 --> 00:02:07,468
Because I'm not.
I'm the one who got dumped.

41
00:02:07,469 --> 00:02:09,475
Oh, sweetie,
we are all so concerned.

42
00:02:09,476 --> 00:02:12,405
But is he gone? Okay.
All right, okay.

43
00:02:12,406 --> 00:02:16,248
You guys have got to help me
unload these things.

44
00:02:19,486 --> 00:02:22,588
You bought all
of Danny's jerseys?

45
00:02:22,606 --> 00:02:25,858
Where you when I was selling
homemade taquitos?

46
00:02:27,561 --> 00:02:29,898
All right, Danny's contract
is coming up.

47
00:02:29,899 --> 00:02:33,181
And nothing says "Cut me from the team"
like a bunch of unsold T-shirts.

48
00:02:33,182 --> 00:02:35,880
Mom, Danny's an adult.
Just tell him the truth.

49
00:02:35,881 --> 00:02:39,138
- We're Wheelers. We can handle it.
- Really, Ben?

50
00:02:39,785 --> 00:02:41,569
You want the truth?

51
00:02:41,620 --> 00:02:43,055
<i>Okay.</i>

52
00:02:43,658 --> 00:02:47,360
You never sold one tube
of wrapping paper.

53
00:02:47,361 --> 00:02:49,149
Your lemonade stand sucked.

54
00:02:49,150 --> 00:02:51,746
And when you finally graduated
from junior high,

55
00:02:51,747 --> 00:02:55,583
it wasn't because you were good at math.
It was because I was good at flirting.

56
00:03:01,222 --> 00:03:03,708
I lie to you boys
to protect you.

57
00:03:03,726 --> 00:03:06,678
It's called being a parent.
Okay, get used to it.

58
00:03:13,133 --> 00:03:16,133
Synced by Reef
www.addic7ed.com

59
00:03:16,180 --> 00:03:19,605
Season 3, Episode 3
"Lights! Camera! No Action!"

60
00:03:19,882 --> 00:03:22,581
Danny, for the last time,
I'm fine.

61
00:03:22,839 --> 00:03:24,773
Why wouldn't you think I'm fine?
I'm fine!

62
00:03:25,070 --> 00:03:26,988
Riley, I've known you
my entire life.

63
00:03:27,022 --> 00:03:29,023
And whenever you get upset,
you stress-eat.

64
00:03:29,041 --> 00:03:31,025
Well, obviously, you don't
know me at all

65
00:03:31,026 --> 00:03:33,395
because this is
stress-baking.

66
00:03:33,729 --> 00:03:36,115
You know?
And there's a big difference

67
00:03:36,185 --> 00:03:40,001
'Cause in the past, I mean,
I would have eaten all of these,

68
00:03:40,035 --> 00:03:42,003
but now I just take a bite...

69
00:03:42,856 --> 00:03:44,655
Of each one.

70
00:03:47,692 --> 00:03:50,343
It has been 36 hours
and not one call.

71
00:03:50,377 --> 00:03:52,244
I mean, why hasn't he called,
Danny? Why?

72
00:03:52,279 --> 00:03:54,396
Maybe it's because
you told him not to.

73
00:03:54,397 --> 00:03:56,916
Um, I'm a woman.
I didn't mean it.

74
00:03:57,952 --> 00:04:01,858
I mean, you don't get over
a lifetime of love in 36 hours.

75
00:04:05,339 --> 00:04:07,846
And if he did love me,
he'd be here right now.

76
00:04:07,854 --> 00:04:10,014
I mean, he'd fight for me,
right?

77
00:04:10,015 --> 00:04:13,346
I would've.
I mean, he should've.

78
00:04:14,301 --> 00:04:16,218
You know what
I need to do?

79
00:04:16,525 --> 00:04:18,254
I need to move on.

80
00:04:18,305 --> 00:04:19,471
You know what?
That's it.

81
00:04:19,506 --> 00:04:21,774
I am moving on.
I am done with Ben Wheeler.

82
00:04:21,775 --> 00:04:22,875
- Really?
- Really.

83
00:04:22,876 --> 00:04:24,984
Oh my God,
this one looks like him.

84
00:04:28,648 --> 00:04:30,583
One sock.

85
00:04:30,584 --> 00:04:32,268
And number two.

86
00:04:32,269 --> 00:04:33,393
- No! No.
- Why?

87
00:04:33,394 --> 00:04:34,685
No, I am not wearing
this to work.

88
00:04:34,686 --> 00:04:37,237
And I am not booking Danny on the show.
He's not famous enough.

89
00:04:37,238 --> 00:04:39,122
Hey, I have seen
"The Mary Hart Show."

90
00:04:39,182 --> 00:04:41,823
- You don't always have celebrities.
- Yes, we do.

91
00:04:41,824 --> 00:04:43,951
Okay, what about that monkey
you had on yesterday?

92
00:04:43,952 --> 00:04:46,661
- He can drive a car!
- Yeah, well, so can Danny!

93
00:04:46,662 --> 00:04:48,913
- A stick shift?!
- Well, he can learn!

94
00:04:51,434 --> 00:04:53,573
And that's why
I put you in day care.

95
00:04:53,609 --> 00:04:56,596
Oh, Ben, I keep forgetting to tell you.
I got a lead on an apartment.

96
00:04:56,597 --> 00:04:58,839
So it looks like I'll finally
be getting off your couch.

97
00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:01,949
Hey, that's great. Hey, let me call
Riley and tell her the great news.

98
00:05:01,967 --> 00:05:04,413
Oh wait,
she's not talking to me.

99
00:05:04,438 --> 00:05:08,005
Ben, I'm so sorry if I had anything
to do with you and Riley breaking up.

100
00:05:08,006 --> 00:05:11,742
You know, some people would say
you had everything to do with it.

101
00:05:11,743 --> 00:05:13,430
And I happen to be
one of those people.

102
00:05:13,431 --> 00:05:15,516
Well, I still think it would
make our daughter happy

103
00:05:15,517 --> 00:05:16,998
if we at least
gave it a shot.

104
00:05:17,032 --> 00:05:19,448
Angela, we're not
playing house here.

105
00:05:19,449 --> 00:05:21,383
You don't even know where you're
gonna be in the next month.

106
00:05:21,384 --> 00:05:23,625
But that's just it.
I'm ready to stay.

107
00:05:23,626 --> 00:05:25,493
In fact, I was offered
a big part in L.A.

108
00:05:25,494 --> 00:05:27,628
and I already told my agent
I'm not interested.

109
00:05:27,663 --> 00:05:29,431
Maybe you don't see it,

110
00:05:29,465 --> 00:05:32,221
but I think we have the makings
of a pretty nice little family.

111
00:05:32,222 --> 00:05:34,000
Oh, I see plenty.

112
00:05:34,131 --> 00:05:35,813
No, seriously,
go put some clothes on.

113
00:05:37,740 --> 00:05:40,409
And they're super absorbent.

114
00:05:40,443 --> 00:05:42,461
Huh?
Voila! Huh?

115
00:05:42,512 --> 00:05:43,900
- Here, take it.
- Hey.

116
00:05:43,901 --> 00:05:46,348
I did it.
I actually did it.

117
00:05:46,382 --> 00:05:49,717
Well, so did I last Tuesday, but I'm
not running around bragging about it.

118
00:05:50,620 --> 00:05:52,521
No, no.

119
00:05:52,555 --> 00:05:56,001
I talked to Mary Hart and I convinced
her to book Danny on the show.

120
00:05:56,002 --> 00:05:58,653
Tucker!
Thank you!

121
00:06:05,936 --> 00:06:07,920
Um, yeah.

122
00:06:07,928 --> 00:06:09,736
- That's never happening again.
- No.

123
00:06:09,793 --> 00:06:11,377
So... so how
did you do it?

124
00:06:11,407 --> 00:06:12,624
Oh my God,
you should have seen me.

125
00:06:12,658 --> 00:06:14,226
- I was amazing.
- Yeah.

126
00:06:14,227 --> 00:06:16,816
A guest canceled, so I asked
if I can book Danny.

127
00:06:16,817 --> 00:06:18,446
She said, "Whatever,
don't talk to me."

128
00:06:18,464 --> 00:06:21,143
- And then that was it. Done.
- Yes.

129
00:06:23,619 --> 00:06:25,635
It's like a Danny Wheeler
fan club in here.

130
00:06:25,636 --> 00:06:27,737
Hey, everyone,
it's me.

131
00:06:29,509 --> 00:06:33,327
Okay, sweetie, you don't
want to cause a riot.

132
00:06:33,645 --> 00:06:36,598
Okay, guess what?
I've got even more good news.

133
00:06:36,599 --> 00:06:39,684
Tucker got you an interview
tomorrow with Mary Hart.

134
00:06:39,934 --> 00:06:41,332
Really?

135
00:06:41,333 --> 00:06:44,322
First my Jersey sells out and now
I get to interview Mary Hart?

136
00:06:45,270 --> 00:06:47,971
Mary, who do you like
in the playoffs?

137
00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:51,780
- Okay.
- Yeah.

138
00:06:53,031 --> 00:06:56,361
Okay, maybe I'll just write out
the questions <i>and</i> the answers

139
00:06:56,362 --> 00:06:58,146
that you'll be giving
to Mary.

140
00:06:58,371 --> 00:07:00,181
Oh, yeah.
That works too.

141
00:07:00,182 --> 00:07:02,340
I'll help right after
you buy me lunch.

142
00:07:02,341 --> 00:07:04,617
- Wait, why am I buying you lunch?
- Are you kidding me?

143
00:07:04,643 --> 00:07:07,405
After that kiss, you should
buy me dinner and a purse.

144
00:07:08,381 --> 00:07:10,952
Danny, there you are.
Hey, so how's Riley doing?

145
00:07:10,953 --> 00:07:13,335
Is she happy,
sad, conflicted,

146
00:07:13,369 --> 00:07:15,570
sticking pins in a small doll
that looks like me?

147
00:07:15,605 --> 00:07:18,174
'Cause my neck has been
killing me all morning.

148
00:07:18,407 --> 00:07:20,442
Actually, I think
she's ready to move on.

149
00:07:20,476 --> 00:07:23,512
Move on?
As in <i>"Ben" voyage?</i>

150
00:07:24,390 --> 00:07:26,381
<i>"Ben" there done that?</i>

151
00:07:27,105 --> 00:07:29,560
Well, it's not like you're
over there fighting for her.

152
00:07:29,585 --> 00:07:33,041
Well, I would've if I thought
something like that would work.

153
00:07:34,425 --> 00:07:36,142
Oh my God,
that could work.

154
00:07:36,826 --> 00:07:39,102
Oh, I've got to go.
Hey, cover for me.

155
00:07:40,405 --> 00:07:42,310
Oh! Hey, mom!

156
00:07:42,311 --> 00:07:45,584
Did you know they're making
towels that look like my jersey?

157
00:07:46,836 --> 00:07:49,571
Ben, hi. Um, what
are you doing here?

158
00:07:49,572 --> 00:07:51,706
We need to talk.
Look, Riley, I've been a fool.

159
00:07:51,712 --> 00:07:52,940
The most important thing...

160
00:07:52,941 --> 00:07:56,005
Oh, why is there a half-naked man
coming out of your bathroom?

161
00:07:56,006 --> 00:07:57,540
Oh, hey, Ben.

162
00:08:00,100 --> 00:08:01,650
You remember Fitch.

163
00:08:05,026 --> 00:08:07,575
Seriously...?
Riley and Fitch?!

164
00:08:07,592 --> 00:08:09,320
I can't believe it.
Can you believe it?

165
00:08:09,345 --> 00:08:11,412
'Cause I know
I can't believe it.

166
00:08:11,447 --> 00:08:12,614
What are you doing?

167
00:08:12,648 --> 00:08:14,558
Working on questions
for Danny's interview.

168
00:08:14,583 --> 00:08:18,376
If you could have dinner
with Gandhi or Jesus Christ,

169
00:08:18,604 --> 00:08:20,443
what would you order?

170
00:08:21,557 --> 00:08:24,067
Tucker, I'm having
a crisis here.

171
00:08:24,493 --> 00:08:26,394
I just thought I meant
something to her.

172
00:08:26,428 --> 00:08:28,296
But obviously she still
has feelings for Fitch.

173
00:08:28,330 --> 00:08:30,431
Riley does not have
feelings for Fitch.

174
00:08:30,466 --> 00:08:32,300
Oh, you weren't there.
Trust me.

175
00:08:32,334 --> 00:08:34,369
They were having feelings.

176
00:08:34,948 --> 00:08:39,027
Ben, look, I believe the scientific
term is called <i>rebound.</i>

177
00:08:39,028 --> 00:08:41,432
It's what you do when you want
to get over someone.

178
00:08:41,466 --> 00:08:44,668
And it seems like that's exactly
what Riley's tryg into do.

179
00:08:44,703 --> 00:08:47,165
- She's moving on.
- That's what Danny said.

180
00:08:47,166 --> 00:08:48,539
Well, then maybe you
should do that too.

181
00:08:48,573 --> 00:08:52,150
You know, if you could spend
one day with Abraham Lincoln...

182
00:08:52,644 --> 00:08:55,337
Would it be
a Tuesday or a Thursday?

183
00:08:57,383 --> 00:08:59,284
- Thursday.
- Mm-hmm.

184
00:09:01,234 --> 00:09:04,405
Now remember, honey. You have
nothing to be nervous about.

185
00:09:04,439 --> 00:09:08,102
Other than the fact that this interview
could make or break both of our careers.

186
00:09:08,437 --> 00:09:10,288
Okay, are you ready?
I'm Mary.

187
00:09:10,322 --> 00:09:12,722
And we're live
in four, three...

188
00:09:14,223 --> 00:09:17,326
♪ Shwada shwada shwa ♪

189
00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:18,460
♪ Mary ♪

190
00:09:20,789 --> 00:09:23,198
welcome, Danny.
First question...

191
00:09:24,647 --> 00:09:26,772
- She does that.
- Yes, I know.

192
00:09:26,929 --> 00:09:29,765
What's going on in your love life?
Are you single?

193
00:09:29,766 --> 00:09:32,270
- Tucker, you know I'm single.
- Oh my God, I am not Tucker.

194
00:09:32,271 --> 00:09:33,834
I am Mary. Did you not
see the hair flip?

195
00:09:33,835 --> 00:09:35,586
Come on.
Come on.

196
00:09:35,616 --> 00:09:37,483
I don't want to talk
about my love life.

197
00:09:37,484 --> 00:09:38,551
Can't we just
talk about hockey?

198
00:09:38,552 --> 00:09:40,619
Conk, click. No.

199
00:09:40,862 --> 00:09:43,320
Danny, nobody gives a crap
about hockey.

200
00:09:43,353 --> 00:09:45,824
They wanna hear about
romance, affairs of the heart.

201
00:09:45,825 --> 00:09:48,631
Well, I haven't had any of those
since Amy and I broke up.

202
00:09:48,632 --> 00:09:50,649
Ooh, Amy.

203
00:09:52,078 --> 00:09:54,985
Oh, wow, so tell me about Amy.
Why'd you break up?

204
00:09:54,986 --> 00:09:57,754
Well, um...

205
00:09:58,134 --> 00:10:00,302
I really don't want
to talk about it.

206
00:10:00,337 --> 00:10:03,238
Why? Was it difficult,
painful, heart-wrenching?

207
00:10:04,755 --> 00:10:06,890
It's just, u..

208
00:10:07,651 --> 00:10:10,770
See, whenever I end up
talking about Amy,

209
00:10:10,771 --> 00:10:12,097
I end up...

210
00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:15,284
I end up...

211
00:10:20,275 --> 00:10:22,528
Oh my God, Danny.
Are you crying?

212
00:10:22,529 --> 00:10:24,098
No! No.

213
00:10:24,726 --> 00:10:27,549
My face is just leaking.
Don't look at me!

214
00:10:29,227 --> 00:10:32,817
Danny, I had no idea
you were so upset about her.

215
00:10:32,818 --> 00:10:34,360
- I'm not!
- Okay.

216
00:10:34,361 --> 00:10:37,927
It's just whenever I think about Amy,
I think about why we broke up.

217
00:10:37,928 --> 00:10:39,235
And then I end up
thinking about...

218
00:10:39,236 --> 00:10:41,649
- Knock, knock.
- Riley.

219
00:10:41,650 --> 00:10:43,785
Hey, I just, um...

220
00:10:43,817 --> 00:10:46,926
I got something in my eye.
It's an eyelash.

221
00:10:47,041 --> 00:10:49,125
Oh, look, I got it.
Make a wish.

222
00:10:51,410 --> 00:10:52,976
Um, is Ben around?

223
00:10:53,010 --> 00:10:55,077
What do I look like?
His mother?

224
00:10:59,366 --> 00:11:02,368
Okay, so what
we've learned so far

225
00:11:02,369 --> 00:11:04,443
is, um, no Amy,

226
00:11:04,444 --> 00:11:05,777
no hockey,

227
00:11:05,778 --> 00:11:08,547
and no chance of me
getting that promotion.

228
00:11:11,616 --> 00:11:14,518
Ben, it's me.
Can we talk?

229
00:11:15,954 --> 00:11:17,488
Please?

230
00:11:17,522 --> 00:11:19,319
Seriously?

231
00:11:19,320 --> 00:11:21,709
How is anybody supposed
to get over anybody

232
00:11:21,710 --> 00:11:23,887
if, every two seconds,
anybody is always trying

233
00:11:23,888 --> 00:11:26,206
to get back together
with somebody?

234
00:11:27,832 --> 00:11:29,411
Anybody?

235
00:11:30,031 --> 00:11:33,090
You must be just wrecked
that Riley just slept with Fitch.

236
00:11:33,091 --> 00:11:34,571
What?!

237
00:11:34,639 --> 00:11:36,540
When did that happen?!

238
00:11:36,558 --> 00:11:39,560
Oh, honey...

239
00:11:39,594 --> 00:11:41,148
Okay.

240
00:11:41,563 --> 00:11:45,251
All right. Listen to me, Danny.
I am talking to you as your mother,

241
00:11:45,252 --> 00:11:47,491
your manager,
and someone who loves you.

242
00:11:47,492 --> 00:11:51,625
We have got a lot riding on this,
so you need to pull it together, leaky!

243
00:11:53,810 --> 00:11:55,526
Okay, fine.
You won't come out.

244
00:11:57,303 --> 00:11:59,563
I'll just talk
and you listen.

245
00:12:00,016 --> 00:12:03,006
Look, nothing happened
with me and Fitch.

246
00:12:03,007 --> 00:12:04,568
I swear.

247
00:12:04,602 --> 00:12:06,978
So he just came over
to change his clothes?

248
00:12:06,986 --> 00:12:10,270
How stupid do you think I am?
Don't answer that.

249
00:12:10,475 --> 00:12:13,577
Look, yes,
I was mad and hurt.

250
00:12:13,611 --> 00:12:15,713
And I thought that somehow
it might help me move on,

251
00:12:15,747 --> 00:12:19,650
but I realized that I was doing it
for all the wrong reasons and...

252
00:12:19,684 --> 00:12:21,652
We just ended up talking.

253
00:12:22,390 --> 00:12:24,755
- Really?
- Yes.

254
00:12:25,035 --> 00:12:27,376
Ben, come on.
You know me.

255
00:12:27,377 --> 00:12:29,906
I would never do
something like that to you.

256
00:12:30,808 --> 00:12:33,910
Oh, hey, Riley.

257
00:12:42,559 --> 00:12:46,002
Okay. Mary will be out in two minutes.
Do you need anything?

258
00:12:46,003 --> 00:12:49,135
- Tea, lozenge, back pillow?
- Is this really your job?

259
00:12:50,743 --> 00:12:52,744
Okay, Danny,
we are all set.

260
00:12:52,778 --> 00:12:56,596
I talked to Jon, the camera guy and
he knows to only shoot you from the left.

261
00:12:56,597 --> 00:12:59,559
And Judy, she's the makeup girl,
she's on the lookout for flop sweat.

262
00:12:59,569 --> 00:13:02,970
And Marco, the cue-card guy,
has a thing for tall blondes.

263
00:13:04,204 --> 00:13:05,794
Oh, and he made you these.

264
00:13:05,841 --> 00:13:08,827
Wow, Danny, I can't believe
you're gonna be on TV.

265
00:13:08,861 --> 00:13:12,832
Wait, I'm not gonna be on TV, am I?
'Cause I called in sick to work, so...

266
00:13:13,783 --> 00:13:16,202
Ben, you are not even
supposed to be here.

267
00:13:16,203 --> 00:13:18,649
I purposefully gave you
the wrong time.

268
00:13:19,672 --> 00:13:21,606
I invited him.

269
00:13:21,640 --> 00:13:24,676
This is my first big interview. I want my
brother and my best friend to be here.

270
00:13:24,710 --> 00:13:26,945
I'm sorry. Your best what?
Riley's not coming here, is she?

271
00:13:26,979 --> 00:13:28,248
Hey, everyone,
I hope we're not late.

272
00:13:28,249 --> 00:13:30,316
Oh, hey, Ben.
Where's your girlfriend?

273
00:13:30,317 --> 00:13:33,651
- Angela's not my girlfriend.
- Oh no, what happened?

274
00:13:33,652 --> 00:13:35,815
Did you already cheat on her
with the hair lady?

275
00:13:36,689 --> 00:13:39,720
You were right.
This is so not awkward.

276
00:13:39,892 --> 00:13:42,760
Hey, guys, do we really
need to do this right now?

277
00:13:42,795 --> 00:13:46,210
Yeah, Danny is right.
Okay, he needs to stay focused.

278
00:13:46,211 --> 00:13:49,213
And we need to make sure that
he knows all of these answers.

279
00:13:49,247 --> 00:13:53,003
Okay. Ooh, hey.
Comfy.

280
00:13:53,066 --> 00:13:55,616
No, no, no, no.
That is Mary's chair.

281
00:13:55,617 --> 00:13:57,946
It was molded to fit
her butt perfectly.

282
00:13:57,947 --> 00:14:00,849
Maybe I should tell her about the time
I made a jell-o mold of my butt.

283
00:14:00,850 --> 00:14:02,427
No, Danny.

284
00:14:02,506 --> 00:14:05,095
If it's not on the cards,
you're not saying it.

285
00:14:05,110 --> 00:14:07,693
I'm not saying your stupid answers.
They don't sound anything like me.

286
00:14:07,694 --> 00:14:09,762
Exactly.
That's the whole point.

287
00:14:09,947 --> 00:14:12,286
Hey, hey, guys, do I
need to remind everybody

288
00:14:12,287 --> 00:14:14,271
that my jersey sold out
in two days?

289
00:14:14,289 --> 00:14:17,886
I think it's pretty clear that Mary
needs me more than I need her.

290
00:14:18,973 --> 00:14:21,456
But what if she didn't?

291
00:14:24,160 --> 00:14:25,731
She's coming.

292
00:14:25,732 --> 00:14:27,733
You people, over there!
You, up.

293
00:14:27,734 --> 00:14:30,304
- Stop it.
- What? I'm not even doing anything.

294
00:14:30,338 --> 00:14:32,802
- Oh my God.
- Oh, hey, Mary.

295
00:14:33,718 --> 00:14:35,198
Hey, Mary,
Bonnie Wheeler.

296
00:14:35,199 --> 00:14:36,985
- I'm your biggest fan.
- That's nice.

297
00:14:36,986 --> 00:14:39,313
But who's the tall
glass of wow?

298
00:14:39,818 --> 00:14:42,182
Danny Wheeler,
professional hockey player

299
00:14:42,220 --> 00:14:44,766
filled with fascinating stories
about my life on the ice.

300
00:14:44,767 --> 00:14:48,484
Well, as long as you keep them
to yourself, we should be just fine.

301
00:14:49,175 --> 00:14:51,810
- Just listen to what I...
- Ben, why are we even talking?

302
00:14:51,811 --> 00:14:54,053
You have no excuse
for your behavior.

303
00:14:54,073 --> 00:14:56,590
Would you be
willing to accept

304
00:14:56,591 --> 00:14:59,392
you told me to get together
with her in the first place?

305
00:15:00,118 --> 00:15:02,002
I did not say that.

306
00:15:02,036 --> 00:15:05,122
I said see if you have something.
Something is not sex.

307
00:15:05,173 --> 00:15:06,924
Well, how was I supposed
to know that?

308
00:15:08,102 --> 00:15:10,137
Yo, yo,
back me up here, man.

309
00:15:10,328 --> 00:15:12,267
It is a little ambiguous.

310
00:15:14,908 --> 00:15:16,008
<i>♪ Mary</i>

311
00:15:16,009 --> 00:15:19,959
Hello, everybody, and welcome to another
edition of "The Mary Hart Show."

312
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,827
I'm Mary Hart.

313
00:15:22,106 --> 00:15:24,966
My first guest
is the ridiculously handsome

314
00:15:24,967 --> 00:15:27,344
New York Ranger
Danny Wheeler.

315
00:15:27,345 --> 00:15:32,580
So, Danny, can you tell us something
about yourself no one else knows?

316
00:15:33,305 --> 00:15:35,710
___

317
00:15:35,920 --> 00:15:37,871
Well, Mary,

318
00:15:37,906 --> 00:15:40,664
one thing that no one else
seems to know about me

319
00:15:40,665 --> 00:15:43,482
is that I can actually
answer questions on my own.

320
00:15:43,483 --> 00:15:46,063
Okay.

321
00:15:46,097 --> 00:15:49,341
Not necessarily something
you need to tell people.

322
00:15:49,561 --> 00:15:50,766
Riley, please.

323
00:15:50,767 --> 00:15:53,170
There has to be something I can say
to make you let this go.

324
00:15:53,204 --> 00:15:55,719
Let it go? No,
I cannot just let it go.

325
00:15:55,720 --> 00:15:58,875
- I think I should go.
- No, no, no. No, no.

326
00:15:58,893 --> 00:16:00,138
You are staying right here.

327
00:16:00,139 --> 00:16:02,907
Because the minute this is over,
we're going back to my place.

328
00:16:02,908 --> 00:16:05,860
And this time,
we really are gonna do it.

329
00:16:10,165 --> 00:16:11,866
So just so we're clear,

330
00:16:11,900 --> 00:16:14,168
there are 30 teams,
six divisions,

331
00:16:14,169 --> 00:16:16,971
two conferences,
but only one Stanley Cup.

332
00:16:17,005 --> 00:16:20,655
Well, I'm usually known
for making people cry,

333
00:16:20,656 --> 00:16:24,745
but I think the only tears we're
gonna see today will be mine.

334
00:16:25,961 --> 00:16:29,140
- No, no, no, no. We can't.
- We have to do something.

335
00:16:29,217 --> 00:16:31,482
If your career ended tomorrow

336
00:16:31,483 --> 00:16:34,582
or perhaps even right
after this interview...

337
00:16:36,158 --> 00:16:37,858
What would you do?

338
00:16:37,893 --> 00:16:39,827
Oh God, okay, just do it.

339
00:16:39,861 --> 00:16:43,848
He'll thank us for this later.
Or I'll just tell him it was your idea.

340
00:16:44,551 --> 00:16:46,551
___

341
00:16:46,552 --> 00:16:49,870
- Does that say "Amy"?
- What? Whoa. What about Amy?

342
00:16:49,905 --> 00:16:52,246
I thought we weren't
gonna talk about her.

343
00:16:52,247 --> 00:16:55,680
It's okay, Danny.
It's just us.

344
00:16:56,581 --> 00:16:58,845
Please, Riley, can't we
just talk about this?

345
00:16:58,847 --> 00:17:01,015
Ben, there is truly
nothing to talk about.

346
00:17:01,049 --> 00:17:03,984
Nothing?! No, there is
everything to talk about.

347
00:17:04,019 --> 00:17:07,154
How about the fact that this whole thing
started when you got upset when I answered

348
00:17:07,189 --> 00:17:10,958
a hypothetical question about
a girl I care nothing about.

349
00:17:10,992 --> 00:17:13,027
Or that when you
walked out,

350
00:17:13,061 --> 00:17:16,207
it felt like my heart had been
physically ripped out of my chest.

351
00:17:16,208 --> 00:17:20,497
Or the fact that any rational
human being who saw what I saw

352
00:17:20,498 --> 00:17:22,398
would think that you
and Fitch had hooked up.

353
00:17:22,492 --> 00:17:26,997
Yes, hooking up with Angela was probably
the dumbest thing I have ever done.

354
00:17:27,008 --> 00:17:29,255
But it wasn't to hurt you,
Riley.

355
00:17:29,256 --> 00:17:31,391
It was to try to stop me
from hurting.

356
00:17:31,563 --> 00:17:33,293
And you know what?

357
00:17:33,397 --> 00:17:35,431
It didn't work.

358
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:40,376
I don't know if this is
the best time to mention it,

359
00:17:40,401 --> 00:17:43,036
but the big guy's kind of
bawling his eyes out.

360
00:17:44,969 --> 00:17:46,203
Go on.

361
00:17:48,442 --> 00:17:52,112
See, that's the thing
about being in love, Mary.

362
00:17:52,146 --> 00:17:55,215
It's great
until it's not.

363
00:17:56,482 --> 00:17:59,457
And then that person who was
your best friend is gone.

364
00:17:59,613 --> 00:18:02,644
I don't wanna
lose any more friends.

365
00:18:06,275 --> 00:18:09,177
And we'll be right back.

366
00:18:09,214 --> 00:18:10,873
Are you okay, honey?

367
00:18:10,874 --> 00:18:12,771
'Cause we're gonna need
to have you cry again

368
00:18:12,772 --> 00:18:14,773
when we come back
from commercial.

369
00:18:23,277 --> 00:18:24,941
Ben, I'm sorry.

370
00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:27,949
I haven't made this
easy on you.

371
00:18:28,006 --> 00:18:30,563
I guess we both
made some mistakes.

372
00:18:30,641 --> 00:18:32,385
Some worse than others.

373
00:18:34,302 --> 00:18:36,241
I mean, Danny's right.

374
00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:38,914
I can't lose you.

375
00:18:39,326 --> 00:18:42,214
That's good.
Then we're in agreement.

376
00:18:42,429 --> 00:18:45,839
So we're gonna be okay?
We can go back to being us?

377
00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:49,059
Um, I don't think
I can do "us".

378
00:18:49,672 --> 00:18:53,878
I mean, maybe one day,
but not right now.

379
00:18:55,228 --> 00:18:56,562
Okay.

380
00:18:57,050 --> 00:18:59,152
Well, then I'll look
forward to that day.

381
00:19:02,483 --> 00:19:05,727
So where does that leave us?

382
00:19:08,197 --> 00:19:10,676
Are we still a go
on the whole sex thing?

383
00:19:11,954 --> 00:19:14,964
Well, I'm in town till Thursday
if you change your mind.

384
00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:21,875
Yeah, and then when
you really got choked up

385
00:19:21,900 --> 00:19:23,034
and couldn't catch
your breath,

386
00:19:23,068 --> 00:19:25,836
the tears were streaming
and the snot was flowing.

387
00:19:25,854 --> 00:19:27,021
Ratings gold!

388
00:19:27,055 --> 00:19:29,840
He cries!
He scores!

389
00:19:31,643 --> 00:19:32,894
Um, did you notice

390
00:19:32,945 --> 00:19:34,645
there's about 20 women
downstairs

391
00:19:34,679 --> 00:19:36,634
clutching your photo
and chanting your name?

392
00:19:36,648 --> 00:19:39,884
Yes, that's because I've been
labeled a sensitive jock.

393
00:19:39,902 --> 00:19:41,819
And later, I plan
on going downstairs

394
00:19:41,853 --> 00:19:44,401
and getting sensitive with
each and every one of them.

395
00:19:44,402 --> 00:19:47,909
Hey, while you're down there,
try to unload a few of these, okay?

396
00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:50,661
Ask for $100,
but I'll take $20.

397
00:19:51,863 --> 00:19:54,899
So any luck working
things out with Riley?

398
00:19:54,933 --> 00:19:58,603
More like working on working
things out with Riley.

399
00:19:58,637 --> 00:20:01,017
Ben, look, I know
it's none of my business,

400
00:20:01,018 --> 00:20:04,619
but you are never gonna get anywhere
if you don't get rid of Angela.

401
00:20:04,620 --> 00:20:08,123
I don't think that's
gonna be a problem anymore.

402
00:20:11,781 --> 00:20:13,481
"Dear, Ben."

403
00:20:13,617 --> 00:20:15,584
"I took that part
in L.A."

404
00:20:15,666 --> 00:20:17,309
"You were right."

405
00:20:17,447 --> 00:20:19,566
"I'm not ready
to play house."

406
00:20:20,027 --> 00:20:21,924
"Tell Emma
I love her."

407
00:20:22,343 --> 00:20:23,828
"Angela."

408
00:20:26,099 --> 00:20:28,166
And she's gone again.

409
00:20:29,835 --> 00:20:33,268
Apparently the only girl I'm destined
to ever have a relationship with

410
00:20:33,269 --> 00:20:35,361
is this one right here.

411
00:20:36,975 --> 00:20:38,572
Oh my God.

412
00:20:38,573 --> 00:20:40,845
That's the sweetest thing
I've ever heard.

413
00:20:42,506 --> 00:20:43,966
Sweetie...

414
00:20:46,060 --> 00:20:48,190
♪ Mary puts
the heart in Hart ♪

415
00:20:48,191 --> 00:20:49,941
♪ Ma... Ma... Ma...
Mary ♪

416
00:20:51,144 --> 00:20:52,244
What else you got?

417
00:20:52,245 --> 00:20:53,380
- Okay, all right.
- Let's go big.

418
00:20:53,404 --> 00:20:55,041
Big guns, big guns.

419
00:20:55,045 --> 00:20:57,284
♪ She's your mama,
your sister, ♪

420
00:20:57,285 --> 00:20:59,052
♪ and your very best friend ♪

421
00:20:59,070 --> 00:21:00,697
♪ her name is Mary Hart ♪

422
00:21:00,698 --> 00:21:02,962
♪ and the fun never ends ♪

423
00:21:02,991 --> 00:21:04,291
♪ oh, Mary ♪

424
00:21:07,329 --> 00:21:08,963
- Where'd she go?
- Where'd she go?

425
00:21:08,997 --> 00:21:10,197
- Mary?
- Mary?

426
00:21:10,232 --> 00:21:11,232
- Mary!
- Mary!

427
00:21:11,266 --> 00:21:12,933
Mary, come on!

428
00:21:12,934 --> 00:21:14,544
- Mary, get back here...
- Mary, you know you like it.

429
00:21:14,569 --> 00:21:17,569
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