1
00:00:03,228 --> 00:00:06,386
I got to say nothing
like a day at the beach...
2
00:00:06,387 --> 00:00:08,392
Even when you're nowhere near the beach.
3
00:00:09,675 --> 00:00:11,636
Oh, hey, will you do my back?
4
00:00:11,637 --> 00:00:12,928
Sure.
5
00:00:12,929 --> 00:00:14,819
And after that, maybe I can do your front.
6
00:00:16,621 --> 00:00:18,203
You wouldn't want to be uneven.
7
00:00:19,496 --> 00:00:20,607
Ben, I warned you.
8
00:00:20,608 --> 00:00:23,031
One pseudo-flirty comment
and I'm out of here.
9
00:00:24,169 --> 00:00:25,635
What?
10
00:00:25,636 --> 00:00:26,565
No, I just realized
11
00:00:26,566 --> 00:00:28,079
that I have absolutely nothing to say.
12
00:00:29,033 --> 00:00:30,087
Tucker: Mine!
13
00:00:31,631 --> 00:00:33,378
Dude, that was mine.
14
00:00:33,379 --> 00:00:34,802
You want to know how I know.
15
00:00:34,803 --> 00:00:36,200
Because I just said "mine."
16
00:00:36,700 --> 00:00:38,646
Dude, I'm a professional athlete.
17
00:00:38,647 --> 00:00:40,017
They're all mine.
18
00:00:40,325 --> 00:00:41,481
(Mouths)
19
00:00:41,482 --> 00:00:43,311
Are you sure we have
permission to be up here?
20
00:00:43,312 --> 00:00:44,569
Yup, totally sure.
21
00:00:44,570 --> 00:00:45,824
Completely approved.
22
00:00:45,825 --> 00:00:47,228
Ben Wheeler!
23
00:00:47,547 --> 00:00:49,189
What are you doing up here on the roof?
24
00:00:49,190 --> 00:00:51,039
Especially since I just told you
25
00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:52,479
that you couldn't be up here...
26
00:00:52,480 --> 00:00:53,518
On the roof.
27
00:00:54,746 --> 00:00:56,423
Okay, maybe not totally approved.
28
00:00:58,419 --> 00:01:01,226
As board president, it
is my duty to remind you
29
00:01:01,227 --> 00:01:02,429
that rules are rules.
30
00:01:02,430 --> 00:01:04,612
And following the rules,
well, that's a rule.
31
00:01:04,613 --> 00:01:06,563
So pack up your flip-flops
and flap on out of here
32
00:01:06,564 --> 00:01:08,433
because tar beach is officially closed.
33
00:01:08,434 --> 00:01:09,617
Sondra, please.
34
00:01:09,618 --> 00:01:11,119
We're not hurting anyone.
35
00:01:14,737 --> 00:01:16,083
Danny: Heads up!
36
00:01:16,475 --> 00:01:17,175
I spiked it!
37
00:01:17,550 --> 00:01:19,153
Did you see that? Here, chest bump me.
38
00:01:19,633 --> 00:01:20,501
Ooh.
39
00:01:21,314 --> 00:01:23,004
You got to bend down a little.
40
00:01:25,015 --> 00:01:26,276
- Yeah, that's good.
- Yeah.
41
00:01:26,277 --> 00:01:27,812
(Theme music plays)
42
00:01:28,543 --> 00:01:31,393
* it's amazing how the unexpected *
43
00:01:31,394 --> 00:01:34,255
* can take your life
and change direction. *
44
00:01:38,889 --> 00:01:43,110
and a six-pack for your six pack.
45
00:01:44,828 --> 00:01:46,157
I'm telling you, she's the worst thing
46
00:01:46,158 --> 00:01:47,620
that's ever happened to this building.
47
00:01:47,621 --> 00:01:48,823
Hey, if you got something to say to me,
48
00:01:48,824 --> 00:01:50,005
say it to my face.
49
00:01:50,774 --> 00:01:52,368
Mom, sondra.
50
00:01:52,369 --> 00:01:53,623
She's at it again.
51
00:01:53,624 --> 00:01:55,310
She closed down tar beach.
52
00:01:55,311 --> 00:01:56,875
She doesn't think we're responsible enough
53
00:01:56,876 --> 00:01:59,202
and that we're not respectful
of other people's property.
54
00:02:02,620 --> 00:02:05,138
Thanks for letting us borrow
your umbrella, Mrs. Wheeler.
55
00:02:06,998 --> 00:02:09,173
Thanks for letting me
borrow your umbrella, honey.
56
00:02:10,454 --> 00:02:11,631
Hey, Brad, here's a little tip
57
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:12,965
if you're hanging out with the wheelers.
58
00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:14,379
Uh, your stuff is their stuff
59
00:02:14,380 --> 00:02:17,208
so expect it to be
broken, stolen, or peed on.
60
00:02:18,472 --> 00:02:19,507
You know what?
61
00:02:19,508 --> 00:02:21,437
I don't care if sondra is board president.
62
00:02:21,438 --> 00:02:22,731
This is America. We don't put up
63
00:02:22,732 --> 00:02:24,234
with petty dictators.
64
00:02:24,235 --> 00:02:26,409
There will be mutiny in the elevators,
65
00:02:26,410 --> 00:02:28,296
revolution in the hallways.
66
00:02:28,297 --> 00:02:30,501
Give me tar beach or give me death!
67
00:02:32,600 --> 00:02:35,528
Uh, before you start loading your musket,
68
00:02:35,529 --> 00:02:36,919
you should probably know
69
00:02:37,997 --> 00:02:39,477
if you want to make a change to the rules,
70
00:02:39,478 --> 00:02:41,292
just hold an election and run against her.
71
00:02:42,513 --> 00:02:44,552
Oh my God, that's such a good idea.
72
00:02:45,441 --> 00:02:46,956
President Wheeler.
73
00:02:46,957 --> 00:02:48,631
Is it too soon to get the t-shirts made?
74
00:02:49,761 --> 00:02:51,507
Honey, you are totally gonna win.
75
00:02:51,508 --> 00:02:53,045
- You really think so?
- Oh God, no.
76
00:02:54,724 --> 00:02:56,757
Everybody in this building hates you.
77
00:02:56,758 --> 00:02:58,966
I mean, I'm your mother
and I wouldn't vote for you.
78
00:03:00,082 --> 00:03:01,216
That's not tr...
79
00:03:01,981 --> 00:03:04,635
okay, it's kind of hard to argue the facts.
80
00:03:05,323 --> 00:03:07,445
But I just need to find a
candidate to run in my place.
81
00:03:07,446 --> 00:03:10,063
- Someone popular, but fun...
- Oh my God, hello.
82
00:03:11,919 --> 00:03:13,674
Charismatic and convincing.
83
00:03:13,675 --> 00:03:15,323
Have you read my online profile?
84
00:03:17,023 --> 00:03:19,469
Previous experience, not a bad idea.
85
00:03:19,470 --> 00:03:22,375
President of my high school
chess club and the mathletes.
86
00:03:23,634 --> 00:03:26,022
Dude, we were just like the athletes...
87
00:03:27,130 --> 00:03:28,874
Except we got beat up a lot.
88
00:03:30,010 --> 00:03:31,420
Fine, fine. You're in.
89
00:03:31,421 --> 00:03:32,580
Yes!
90
00:03:33,122 --> 00:03:35,146
Something has to be
done about this building.
91
00:03:36,244 --> 00:03:38,581
My first constituent complaint.
92
00:03:39,045 --> 00:03:40,598
How may I help you, kind sir?
93
00:03:41,387 --> 00:03:42,770
There's a thief among us.
94
00:03:42,771 --> 00:03:44,441
Someone keeps stealing
my laundry detergent.
95
00:03:44,442 --> 00:03:46,414
Yeah, don't care. (Clears throat)
96
00:03:46,415 --> 00:03:47,946
Ooh, ooh. Here, okay,
97
00:03:47,947 --> 00:03:50,731
we should use the same
slogan I used in mathletes.
98
00:03:51,325 --> 00:03:53,413
"The competition better fear him.
99
00:03:53,790 --> 00:03:56,609
He's like a human pythagorean theorem."
100
00:03:57,486 --> 00:03:58,606
Yeah.
101
00:03:59,922 --> 00:04:02,113
Yeah, I can see why you got beat up a lot.
102
00:04:04,107 --> 00:04:06,237
Hold on a second. I am checking my computer
103
00:04:06,238 --> 00:04:08,815
right now.
104
00:04:11,906 --> 00:04:13,571
Sorry, man, I am totally booked up.
105
00:04:13,572 --> 00:04:15,863
I'll call you when I'm back
in the country. Bye-bye!
106
00:04:15,864 --> 00:04:17,171
(Phone beeps)
107
00:04:17,172 --> 00:04:18,946
- And hello.
- Hi.
108
00:04:19,406 --> 00:04:21,406
Normally when I'm alone
I just sit at the bar,
109
00:04:21,407 --> 00:04:23,650
but here you are and here I am, so...
110
00:04:23,973 --> 00:04:25,796
So why not be alone together, right?
111
00:04:25,797 --> 00:04:26,931
Right.
112
00:04:26,932 --> 00:04:29,781
And now, what should I order?
113
00:04:29,782 --> 00:04:31,330
- What are you having?
- I haven't decided yet.
114
00:04:31,331 --> 00:04:33,284
But I'm definitely thinking something...
115
00:04:34,036 --> 00:04:35,520
Hot.
116
00:04:37,234 --> 00:04:39,098
Good idea. Soup.
117
00:04:41,088 --> 00:04:42,972
I hope I'm not being too forward,
118
00:04:42,973 --> 00:04:45,991
but you have beautiful eyes.
119
00:04:47,124 --> 00:04:48,207
Okay.
120
00:04:48,208 --> 00:04:49,227
Um...
121
00:04:49,667 --> 00:04:50,759
Maybe a little forward,
122
00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:52,434
but... thanks!
123
00:04:52,435 --> 00:04:55,850
Yours are... right where they should be.
124
00:04:57,115 --> 00:04:59,178
And they are looking
forward to seeing things
125
00:04:59,179 --> 00:05:00,983
that they shouldn't.
126
00:05:00,984 --> 00:05:02,767
(Chuckles)
127
00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:06,328
I'm sorry. Are you flirting with me?
128
00:05:06,329 --> 00:05:07,494
No, no.
129
00:05:07,842 --> 00:05:09,625
I am full-on hitting on you.
130
00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:13,275
Oh, my God. Why would you do that?
131
00:05:13,276 --> 00:05:15,263
You're here, you're
pretty, I'm bored. Pick one.
132
00:05:16,769 --> 00:05:18,340
Besides, you started it.
133
00:05:18,341 --> 00:05:20,418
And I am finishing it.
134
00:05:27,314 --> 00:05:28,684
It's finished.
135
00:05:31,911 --> 00:05:33,375
Okay, Tucker.
136
00:05:33,376 --> 00:05:34,537
You just need to be capable
137
00:05:34,538 --> 00:05:35,885
but still a man of the people.
138
00:05:35,886 --> 00:05:37,854
Sincere but smooth.
139
00:05:37,855 --> 00:05:41,569
Dude, I am so smooth lotion puts me on.
140
00:05:41,570 --> 00:05:43,243
- (Bell dings)
- (Laughs)
141
00:05:43,244 --> 00:05:44,714
I got this.
142
00:05:44,715 --> 00:05:46,476
Hello! Tucker Dobbs.
143
00:05:46,477 --> 00:05:48,284
4d. Running for board president.
144
00:05:48,285 --> 00:05:50,173
I dot believe we've had the
pleasure of meeting before.
145
00:05:53,317 --> 00:05:55,347
Mm, now I remember.
146
00:05:56,085 --> 00:05:57,960
Hey, but to be fair,
you look a lot different
147
00:05:57,961 --> 00:05:59,430
with the lights on.
148
00:06:00,087 --> 00:06:01,659
Hope we still have your vote!
149
00:06:02,113 --> 00:06:03,680
Tucker, what is the matter with you?
150
00:06:03,681 --> 00:06:05,400
What? Look, I'm sorry.
151
00:06:05,401 --> 00:06:06,652
It was dark.
152
00:06:06,653 --> 00:06:08,467
Promises were made, and obviously,
153
00:06:08,468 --> 00:06:10,087
some of them were broken.
154
00:06:10,088 --> 00:06:11,375
Okay, well, shake it off.
155
00:06:11,376 --> 00:06:12,806
That's just one vote.
156
00:06:12,807 --> 00:06:14,387
There you go, Ms. proctor.
157
00:06:14,388 --> 00:06:16,630
Now just let me know if there's
anything else you need, okay?
158
00:06:17,045 --> 00:06:18,406
(Bell dings)
159
00:06:18,407 --> 00:06:19,717
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
160
00:06:20,490 --> 00:06:22,576
You want to replace me with Danny?
161
00:06:22,577 --> 00:06:23,643
How could you?
162
00:06:23,644 --> 00:06:25,559
No, I was thinking Mrs. proctor.
163
00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:27,650
But Danny's way better.
164
00:06:28,048 --> 00:06:30,073
Danny, how do you feel
about a career in politics?
165
00:06:30,578 --> 00:06:32,238
I don't know. I already have a job.
166
00:06:34,093 --> 00:06:35,493
Now, Emma,
167
00:06:35,494 --> 00:06:37,424
you know that grandma is only allowed
168
00:06:37,425 --> 00:06:40,053
to buy one item online per day.
169
00:06:40,537 --> 00:06:42,807
Which, sadly, she's already done.
170
00:06:43,247 --> 00:06:47,287
So I'm gonna need you to click right there.
171
00:06:48,541 --> 00:06:51,324
Oh! Next-day shipping?
172
00:06:51,325 --> 00:06:54,105
Oh, Emma, you spoil me. (Murmurs)
173
00:06:54,106 --> 00:06:56,100
Knock, knock. Danny, you are
not going to believe what...
174
00:06:56,101 --> 00:06:57,548
oh! Mrs. Wheeler.
175
00:06:57,958 --> 00:06:59,258
I'm sorry, I was just...
I didn't mean to...
176
00:06:59,259 --> 00:07:01,805
I was... hi!
177
00:07:03,281 --> 00:07:05,551
Oh, Riley! I didn't... I was...
178
00:07:05,552 --> 00:07:07,259
I didn't mean to... spit it out.
179
00:07:09,970 --> 00:07:10,931
Okay...
180
00:07:11,917 --> 00:07:13,043
Mrs. Wheeler,
181
00:07:13,593 --> 00:07:15,832
I'm so sorry to have to be
the one to tell you this,
182
00:07:15,833 --> 00:07:19,238
but your boyfriend kind of just hit on me.
183
00:07:19,239 --> 00:07:20,824
Oh, can you blame him?
184
00:07:20,825 --> 00:07:22,601
I wanted to hit you a bunch of times.
185
00:07:25,311 --> 00:07:26,836
Not hit me.
186
00:07:26,837 --> 00:07:28,674
Hit on me.
187
00:07:28,675 --> 00:07:31,108
Oh, honey, you probably misunderstood him.
188
00:07:31,519 --> 00:07:32,916
Why would he want the dinghy
189
00:07:32,917 --> 00:07:34,671
when he's already got the yacht?
190
00:07:38,464 --> 00:07:39,790
Hey, babe, ready to roll?
191
00:07:39,791 --> 00:07:42,190
- Oh, hey, Brad.
- Aah! Hi. Riley.
192
00:07:42,786 --> 00:07:44,387
I did not see you there.
193
00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:47,559
Go ahead. Ask him.
194
00:07:47,560 --> 00:07:48,913
Ask me what?
195
00:07:48,914 --> 00:07:50,543
Okay. All right. Fine.
196
00:07:50,544 --> 00:07:53,131
Brad, Riley has got this crazy idea
197
00:07:53,132 --> 00:07:54,855
that you hit on her.
198
00:07:54,856 --> 00:07:57,708
What? I would never do that to you.
199
00:07:58,061 --> 00:08:01,742
See? I know it's been a while
since you had a boyfriend,
200
00:08:01,743 --> 00:08:05,242
but... well, that's really
all I have to say about that.
201
00:08:07,887 --> 00:08:09,526
Something hot.
202
00:08:10,794 --> 00:08:12,516
Beautiful eyes.
203
00:08:12,517 --> 00:08:13,831
Any of this coming back to you?
204
00:08:14,886 --> 00:08:17,377
Oh, okay.
205
00:08:17,378 --> 00:08:18,902
I know what happened.
206
00:08:18,903 --> 00:08:21,446
You must have run into my brother, tad.
207
00:08:21,865 --> 00:08:23,113
We're twins.
208
00:08:27,202 --> 00:08:28,335
Really, that's...
209
00:08:28,777 --> 00:08:31,547
I had no idea you had a twin brother.
210
00:08:31,548 --> 00:08:34,611
That actually kind of makes sense now.
211
00:08:34,612 --> 00:08:35,900
(Chuckles)
212
00:08:35,901 --> 00:08:37,514
Well, if that makes sense,
213
00:08:37,515 --> 00:08:39,827
then your B.S. Meter is on the Fritz.
214
00:08:39,828 --> 00:08:42,121
Because that just pinged off the charts.
215
00:08:43,039 --> 00:08:45,063
Bonnie, I swear. You have to believe me.
216
00:08:45,064 --> 00:08:46,164
Oh, oh, I will.
217
00:08:46,165 --> 00:08:47,604
Once you introduce me.
218
00:08:47,605 --> 00:08:48,972
And if I'm not seeing double,
219
00:08:48,973 --> 00:08:50,421
you're gonna be single.
220
00:08:50,422 --> 00:08:52,462
Well, actually tad is pretty...
221
00:08:52,463 --> 00:08:53,890
I'll see what I can do.
222
00:08:53,891 --> 00:08:55,403
Yeah, good. All right, Riley.
223
00:08:55,404 --> 00:08:57,087
Cancel your plans. It looks like you and I
224
00:08:57,088 --> 00:08:58,652
are going on a double date tonight.
225
00:08:58,653 --> 00:08:59,727
Oh, actually, tonight I was going to...
226
00:09:00,245 --> 00:09:01,437
I'll be there.
227
00:09:03,815 --> 00:09:04,987
Danny: Go rangers!
228
00:09:06,198 --> 00:09:07,578
Way to go, Danny!
229
00:09:08,015 --> 00:09:09,648
Yes, I think that's one more vote
230
00:09:09,649 --> 00:09:12,071
for Danny Wheeler... man, this is easy.
231
00:09:12,072 --> 00:09:13,400
I should run for real president.
232
00:09:14,980 --> 00:09:16,908
Well, well, well.
233
00:09:17,681 --> 00:09:19,552
If it isn't small, medium, and large.
234
00:09:23,499 --> 00:09:24,695
(Scoffs)
235
00:09:24,696 --> 00:09:25,976
Hello, sondra.
236
00:09:25,977 --> 00:09:27,491
Hey, did you lose something?
237
00:09:27,492 --> 00:09:29,213
Like... an election?
238
00:09:29,214 --> 00:09:30,980
(All laugh)
239
00:09:32,048 --> 00:09:33,723
I just came by to say good-bye.
240
00:09:33,724 --> 00:09:34,918
Good-bye, Ben.
241
00:09:35,563 --> 00:09:36,772
Oh, are you moving out?
242
00:09:36,773 --> 00:09:38,616
- 'Cause that would solve a ton of problems.
- Right.
243
00:09:38,617 --> 00:09:40,236
- Totally.
- Nope!
244
00:09:40,237 --> 00:09:41,695
You are! (Laughs)
245
00:09:42,149 --> 00:09:43,462
You see this?
246
00:09:43,463 --> 00:09:46,300
It's a record of every violation
247
00:09:46,301 --> 00:09:47,595
you've ever committed.
248
00:09:48,748 --> 00:09:50,693
- She's even got
pictures. - Mm-hmm.
249
00:09:50,694 --> 00:09:53,305
Oh, wow. I totally forgot about that night.
250
00:09:53,754 --> 00:09:56,118
I guess I can't run for real president now.
251
00:09:58,458 --> 00:09:59,626
And if you don't win,
252
00:10:00,009 --> 00:10:01,371
which you won't,
253
00:10:01,372 --> 00:10:02,960
I'm having you evicted.
254
00:10:03,281 --> 00:10:04,796
And this sign
255
00:10:04,797 --> 00:10:06,477
is going up first thing Monday
morning. (Elevator dings)
256
00:10:07,310 --> 00:10:09,033
You messed with the wrong girl, Ben.
257
00:10:09,394 --> 00:10:10,556
The wrong girl.
258
00:10:14,595 --> 00:10:15,730
Evicted?
259
00:10:16,815 --> 00:10:17,730
Hey.
260
00:10:17,731 --> 00:10:18,948
If she wants to play dirty,
261
00:10:18,949 --> 00:10:20,905
then we will play dirty.
262
00:10:22,358 --> 00:10:24,226
But we should probably get
some boxes just in case.
263
00:10:28,137 --> 00:10:30,759
But laundry room security
isn't my only priority.
264
00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:33,331
I also plan on doing something
about the air conditioning.
265
00:10:33,332 --> 00:10:35,008
'Cause we know it sure can get hot.
266
00:10:35,408 --> 00:10:37,744
At least... I know I am.
267
00:10:38,997 --> 00:10:40,738
Whoo!
268
00:10:42,121 --> 00:10:43,577
That's better.
269
00:10:44,071 --> 00:10:45,584
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
270
00:10:45,585 --> 00:10:47,200
- Real classy.
- (Door closes)
271
00:10:47,617 --> 00:10:48,819
Oh, please.
272
00:10:48,820 --> 00:10:50,881
I've seen you take your pants off for $1.
273
00:10:52,697 --> 00:10:54,809
So was it a yes?
274
00:10:54,810 --> 00:10:56,750
That was an "oh, yes."
275
00:10:56,751 --> 00:10:58,393
(Laughs) Which means
276
00:10:58,394 --> 00:10:59,986
we could actually win this thing.
277
00:10:59,987 --> 00:11:01,611
It all comes down to one deciding vote.
278
00:11:02,693 --> 00:11:04,117
Old lady Curtis.
279
00:11:04,676 --> 00:11:06,805
She's an
80-year-old shut-in.
280
00:11:06,806 --> 00:11:09,188
How you gonna bribe her, "ab" Lincoln?
281
00:11:10,763 --> 00:11:12,553
More tea, dear?
282
00:11:12,554 --> 00:11:14,135
Oh, yes, ma'am.
283
00:11:14,136 --> 00:11:15,514
I love tea.
284
00:11:20,102 --> 00:11:21,373
Oops.
285
00:11:27,985 --> 00:11:30,222
Mrs. Wheeler, what are you doing?
286
00:11:30,223 --> 00:11:32,282
Oh, I'm just loosening
up my drink-throwing arm.
287
00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:34,188
I haven't thrown a drink
288
00:11:34,189 --> 00:11:35,791
in a man's face since principal Roberts
289
00:11:35,792 --> 00:11:37,203
told me I looked pregnant.
290
00:11:38,465 --> 00:11:40,411
I mean, I was, but he didn't know it.
291
00:11:44,540 --> 00:11:46,284
I think you're going to feel pretty silly
292
00:11:46,285 --> 00:11:47,936
when two very handsome men
293
00:11:47,937 --> 00:11:49,395
come walking in that door.
294
00:11:49,396 --> 00:11:51,194
Well, after I break up with Brad,
295
00:11:51,195 --> 00:11:52,712
maybe we can date them.
296
00:11:54,461 --> 00:11:56,420
Yeah I just can't believe
that he would do this to me.
297
00:11:56,994 --> 00:11:59,544
Me! I'm an angel!
298
00:12:01,064 --> 00:12:02,675
Hey, ladies! Sorry I'm late.
299
00:12:02,676 --> 00:12:04,181
- My brother is...
- Oh, no no no.
300
00:12:04,182 --> 00:12:06,201
Let me guess... medical emergency?
301
00:12:06,202 --> 00:12:07,585
Called away suddenly?
302
00:12:07,586 --> 00:12:09,677
Stopped at the excuse
store, but they were closed?
303
00:12:10,477 --> 00:12:12,764
No no no. No no. Tad is just
running a few minutes behind.
304
00:12:12,765 --> 00:12:15,429
And here he is now. He needs cab fare.
305
00:12:15,430 --> 00:12:17,711
Typical tad. I will be right back.
306
00:12:17,712 --> 00:12:19,047
Oh, that tad.
307
00:12:22,469 --> 00:12:24,021
Okay, so...
308
00:12:24,328 --> 00:12:25,806
I know what you're thinking.
309
00:12:25,807 --> 00:12:28,376
But why would he come all the way down here
310
00:12:28,377 --> 00:12:29,884
just to turn around and leave?
311
00:12:30,238 --> 00:12:32,071
You're right, Riley.
312
00:12:32,072 --> 00:12:34,342
Maybe he'll ride back in on a unicorn.
313
00:12:35,460 --> 00:12:37,001
Hey, sorry I'm late.
314
00:12:37,002 --> 00:12:39,123
And so nice to see you again.
315
00:12:39,124 --> 00:12:40,569
And you must be Bonnie.
316
00:12:40,570 --> 00:12:42,590
Brad will not stop talking about you.
317
00:12:42,591 --> 00:12:44,461
Hey, sorry about that whole
lunch thing... small world.
318
00:12:46,125 --> 00:12:47,648
Glasses?
319
00:12:48,782 --> 00:12:49,952
Really?
320
00:12:49,953 --> 00:12:51,311
Glasses.
321
00:12:52,031 --> 00:12:53,784
Is that the best you could do?
322
00:12:54,483 --> 00:12:56,551
I mean, come on. Hey, everybody.
323
00:12:56,552 --> 00:12:58,687
Have you met my cousin Connie?
324
00:12:58,688 --> 00:13:00,411
(With British accent) Oh, hello, everybody!
325
00:13:00,412 --> 00:13:01,540
Hello!
326
00:13:03,036 --> 00:13:04,279
Okay, so...
327
00:13:04,664 --> 00:13:06,140
Not to cause any trouble here,
328
00:13:06,141 --> 00:13:08,322
but where exactly is your brother?
329
00:13:08,323 --> 00:13:09,648
Uh, oh, he got a call.
330
00:13:09,649 --> 00:13:11,079
He said he'd be like two seconds.
331
00:13:11,663 --> 00:13:12,965
Let me just go and grab him.
332
00:13:15,710 --> 00:13:17,761
- He seems nice.
- Does he?
333
00:13:17,762 --> 00:13:18,958
Does he really?
334
00:13:20,394 --> 00:13:21,980
I'm really sorry about the cup.
335
00:13:22,556 --> 00:13:25,465
Oh... that's okay, dear.
336
00:13:26,625 --> 00:13:30,045
What does "priceless" really mean, anyway?
337
00:13:31,757 --> 00:13:33,881
You know, one of the other benefits
338
00:13:33,882 --> 00:13:35,440
of having a tall president...
339
00:13:35,441 --> 00:13:38,158
there's always someone
available to change light bulbs.
340
00:13:38,159 --> 00:13:40,721
That's how my first husband died.
341
00:13:40,722 --> 00:13:41,957
Changing a light bulb?
342
00:13:41,958 --> 00:13:43,342
No. Interrupting me
343
00:13:43,343 --> 00:13:45,536
while I was having a conversation.
344
00:13:47,286 --> 00:13:49,540
Mrs. Curtis, here's the truth.
345
00:13:49,541 --> 00:13:50,928
Look, we don't know if we can do this,
346
00:13:50,929 --> 00:13:52,745
but we have to do something to stop sondra.
347
00:13:53,096 --> 00:13:54,221
If we don't win this,
348
00:13:54,222 --> 00:13:55,598
she's going to evict the three of us
349
00:13:55,599 --> 00:13:57,139
and my beautiful little girl.
350
00:13:57,910 --> 00:13:59,664
You wouldn't want that, would you?
351
00:13:59,665 --> 00:14:02,363
Actually, I don't care
one way or the other.
352
00:14:03,810 --> 00:14:05,864
But I do hate that sondra.
353
00:14:06,197 --> 00:14:08,168
That voice makes me grateful
354
00:14:08,169 --> 00:14:10,889
my hearing aid has volume control.
355
00:14:12,189 --> 00:14:13,414
You have my vote.
356
00:14:13,847 --> 00:14:15,037
Really?
357
00:14:15,038 --> 00:14:17,024
That's great! Thank you.
358
00:14:17,025 --> 00:14:19,334
That's okay. It could happen to anyone.
359
00:14:19,335 --> 00:14:21,922
- Here, let me...
- (Loud crashing)
360
00:14:21,923 --> 00:14:23,699
(Crashing, shattering continues)
361
00:14:36,005 --> 00:14:37,376
So...
362
00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:39,067
Can we still count on your vote?
363
00:14:39,693 --> 00:14:43,719
If you can get the big one
to stop moving around, sure.
364
00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:45,045
Both: Really?!
365
00:14:45,046 --> 00:14:46,599
Oh, my God. Thank you!
366
00:14:47,463 --> 00:14:48,787
Oh! Oh.
367
00:14:50,887 --> 00:14:52,178
Mrs. Curtis?
368
00:14:53,415 --> 00:14:54,550
Mrs. Curtis?
369
00:15:01,487 --> 00:15:04,216
Dude! How hard did you hug her?
370
00:15:09,889 --> 00:15:12,056
Well, Riley, if you're keeping score,
371
00:15:12,057 --> 00:15:14,787
we have Brad with four appearances
372
00:15:14,788 --> 00:15:16,737
and tad with only two.
373
00:15:17,912 --> 00:15:21,216
I'm expecting a visit
from tad any moment now.
374
00:15:22,420 --> 00:15:24,596
I am so sorry, bon-bon.
375
00:15:24,597 --> 00:15:26,078
I don't think I've ever
gotten so many phone calls
376
00:15:26,079 --> 00:15:27,144
in my entire life.
377
00:15:27,514 --> 00:15:29,890
And it's Brad with five!
378
00:15:30,853 --> 00:15:33,728
All right, you seem to be
the star of this little show.
379
00:15:34,751 --> 00:15:36,487
Where is tad?
380
00:15:36,488 --> 00:15:38,926
Well, Brad, the last we heard
381
00:15:38,927 --> 00:15:40,875
tad's still stuck in the bathroom stall.
382
00:15:40,876 --> 00:15:42,456
Really, they still haven't gotten him out?
383
00:15:42,944 --> 00:15:44,320
I should probably go and check on him.
384
00:15:44,321 --> 00:15:45,546
Yeah, yeah.
385
00:15:45,924 --> 00:15:48,583
(Scoffs) Okay, either he's the worst liar
386
00:15:48,584 --> 00:15:50,381
I have ever met, or he thinks
387
00:15:50,382 --> 00:15:52,853
I am the dumbest woman
on the face of the planet.
388
00:15:53,609 --> 00:15:55,509
I mean, it could be a combination.
389
00:15:59,908 --> 00:16:01,757
Oh, my God. You're not gonna
believe what just happened.
390
00:16:01,758 --> 00:16:02,916
Oh, you got that right.
391
00:16:03,306 --> 00:16:04,876
I was finally able to open the stall,
392
00:16:04,877 --> 00:16:06,411
but then the door hit
Brad right in the nose.
393
00:16:06,412 --> 00:16:07,994
There's blood everywhere!
394
00:16:07,995 --> 00:16:09,389
- What?!
- Oh, my God. Really?
395
00:16:09,390 --> 00:16:10,761
- Is he okay?
- I think so.
396
00:16:10,762 --> 00:16:12,735
- I just need some ice.
- Oh, yeah, here.
397
00:16:12,736 --> 00:16:14,042
Here take mine.
398
00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:17,983
You know, I'm so sorry, Mrs. Wheeler.
399
00:16:17,984 --> 00:16:19,280
You were right.
400
00:16:19,281 --> 00:16:22,097
You are just the lowest of the low.
401
00:16:22,098 --> 00:16:23,517
You know, the kind of guy who thinks he can
402
00:16:23,518 --> 00:16:25,221
lie his way out of anything
because you look like
403
00:16:25,222 --> 00:16:27,991
a second-rate department store mannequin.
404
00:16:29,163 --> 00:16:30,535
Well, you know what...
405
00:16:30,536 --> 00:16:33,732
"Brad," "tad, "or any other
word that rhymes with "cad"...
406
00:16:33,733 --> 00:16:36,498
you can just crawl back
to your outlet mall.
407
00:16:36,499 --> 00:16:38,031
'Cause we ain't buying what you're selling.
408
00:16:40,182 --> 00:16:42,510
- Anything to add?
- Nope.
409
00:16:42,912 --> 00:16:44,432
Think you about covered it.
410
00:16:44,433 --> 00:16:45,777
Ooh, wait.
411
00:16:49,973 --> 00:16:51,720
Like riding a bike, you know?
412
00:16:54,436 --> 00:16:56,119
Wait wait wait wait... Bonnie...
413
00:16:56,120 --> 00:16:57,942
Riley, I can explain!
414
00:16:57,943 --> 00:16:59,607
Where... where are they going?
415
00:17:00,256 --> 00:17:02,122
And what did you do?
416
00:17:03,224 --> 00:17:04,662
Ugh, I swear!
417
00:17:04,663 --> 00:17:06,198
This purse is just gonna be the end...
418
00:17:08,665 --> 00:17:10,983
(stammers) Brad?
419
00:17:12,948 --> 00:17:14,215
Tad?
420
00:17:15,046 --> 00:17:17,575
So do you guys want one big apology,
421
00:17:17,576 --> 00:17:18,912
or two little ones?
422
00:17:19,961 --> 00:17:22,525
Maybe if we... Or we could just...
423
00:17:22,526 --> 00:17:23,759
No, Ben, that's illegal.
424
00:17:25,824 --> 00:17:27,288
Ben, it's over.
425
00:17:27,289 --> 00:17:29,527
We are never gonna be
winning any hearts and minds
426
00:17:29,528 --> 00:17:32,211
once people find out that
we killed Mrs. Curtis.
427
00:17:33,321 --> 00:17:35,145
Tucker, man, it's gonna be fine.
428
00:17:35,146 --> 00:17:37,026
You weren't the one who
had to climb on top of her
429
00:17:37,027 --> 00:17:38,443
and give her cpr!
430
00:17:40,089 --> 00:17:41,745
It is never going to be fine.
431
00:17:41,746 --> 00:17:43,397
I am never going to be fine.
432
00:17:45,621 --> 00:17:47,121
Her teeth came out.
433
00:17:48,019 --> 00:17:49,182
(Door opens)
434
00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:51,442
Men.
435
00:17:51,443 --> 00:17:53,585
I can't believe I made two of you.
436
00:17:53,586 --> 00:17:54,981
I disgust myself.
437
00:17:56,816 --> 00:17:58,572
You think you can walk all over us.
438
00:17:59,063 --> 00:18:00,072
Well, guess what...
439
00:18:00,073 --> 00:18:01,421
I am not a floor.
440
00:18:01,726 --> 00:18:03,017
But if I was a floor,
441
00:18:03,018 --> 00:18:05,457
I would be covered in
beautiful shag carpeting.
442
00:18:06,650 --> 00:18:08,952
Sure, I might have some traffic patterns
443
00:18:08,953 --> 00:18:10,753
and a bald spot near the floor lamp.
444
00:18:10,754 --> 00:18:12,108
But my point is...
445
00:18:12,109 --> 00:18:13,380
do you actually even have a point?
446
00:18:13,381 --> 00:18:15,173
No, I am so upset, I have no idea
447
00:18:15,174 --> 00:18:16,218
where I'm going with this.
448
00:18:17,039 --> 00:18:17,978
(Door opens)
449
00:18:18,386 --> 00:18:19,717
(Panting) Mrs. Wheeler.
450
00:18:19,718 --> 00:18:21,355
I didn't... I was...
451
00:18:21,356 --> 00:18:22,458
I didn't mean to...
452
00:18:22,846 --> 00:18:24,032
hi!
453
00:18:25,502 --> 00:18:28,199
Okay, boys, look at this face, huh?
454
00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:30,893
This is the face of a true friend.
455
00:18:31,289 --> 00:18:33,097
She threw a $15 cocktail
456
00:18:33,098 --> 00:18:33,991
into a man's face.
457
00:18:34,519 --> 00:18:38,099
For me. $15.
458
00:18:39,728 --> 00:18:41,862
So, remember when I said
459
00:18:41,863 --> 00:18:43,943
that your boyfriend kind of hit on me?
460
00:18:43,944 --> 00:18:46,166
- Yeah.
- Well, it turns out he didn't.
461
00:18:47,630 --> 00:18:50,612
And his brother tad really does exist.
462
00:18:50,613 --> 00:18:52,319
Oh, why are you trying to cover up for that
463
00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:55,649
no-good, gorgeous man that
I dumped because of you?
464
00:18:57,146 --> 00:18:59,266
I can't believe God made two of them.
465
00:18:59,267 --> 00:19:00,752
Oh! All right.
466
00:19:02,423 --> 00:19:03,835
Oh, my God. I've gotta go.
467
00:19:03,836 --> 00:19:05,064
You are dead to me.
468
00:19:07,348 --> 00:19:08,559
- Oh, hey, mom.
- Hi, honey.
469
00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:10,183
Hey, guys, it worked!
470
00:19:10,184 --> 00:19:11,360
I set up a surveillance camera,
471
00:19:11,361 --> 00:19:12,864
and I caught the detergent thief.
472
00:19:13,732 --> 00:19:15,020
Wow, that's great.
473
00:19:15,021 --> 00:19:17,028
Hey, remind me to put that in today's list
474
00:19:17,029 --> 00:19:18,672
of amazing accomplishments...
475
00:19:18,673 --> 00:19:20,351
right after "we're getting evicted"
476
00:19:20,352 --> 00:19:21,942
and "I kissed a dead woman."
477
00:19:24,088 --> 00:19:25,333
Evicted?
478
00:19:25,334 --> 00:19:26,774
Oh, we'll see about that.
479
00:19:28,122 --> 00:19:29,455
Danny: Wait for it.
480
00:19:29,825 --> 00:19:31,474
Wait for it.
481
00:19:32,731 --> 00:19:33,934
There! There.
482
00:19:33,935 --> 00:19:35,354
Gotcha.
483
00:19:35,355 --> 00:19:36,521
Now what have you got to say, huh?
484
00:19:37,070 --> 00:19:39,561
Okay, so maybe I borrowed a few drops
485
00:19:39,562 --> 00:19:41,267
of your precious detergent.
486
00:19:41,268 --> 00:19:42,737
It is so not a big deal.
487
00:19:42,738 --> 00:19:44,803
Everyone does it. Everyone!
488
00:19:45,401 --> 00:19:47,989
Ho, ho! Then I guess you wouldn't mind me
489
00:19:47,990 --> 00:19:50,217
emailing this video to
everyone in the building.
490
00:19:50,544 --> 00:19:52,156
You wouldn't dare.
491
00:19:53,082 --> 00:19:54,562
Oh, wouldn't I?
492
00:19:55,015 --> 00:19:56,660
Obviously meaning that I would.
493
00:19:59,091 --> 00:20:00,585
- Boom.
- (Imitates explosion)
494
00:20:02,080 --> 00:20:03,867
Okay! Fine!
495
00:20:03,868 --> 00:20:05,334
He can be president.
496
00:20:05,335 --> 00:20:06,454
Men: Yes!
497
00:20:06,455 --> 00:20:08,382
Make whatever stupid rules you want.
498
00:20:08,383 --> 00:20:10,309
At least now I won't have people calling
499
00:20:10,310 --> 00:20:12,384
and complaining 24 hours a day.
500
00:20:12,385 --> 00:20:14,552
- Wait, they call you?
- All the time.
501
00:20:14,553 --> 00:20:16,859
Oh, and no more of those horrible meetings.
502
00:20:16,860 --> 00:20:18,159
So boring.
503
00:20:19,127 --> 00:20:20,100
There are meetings?
504
00:20:21,347 --> 00:20:22,616
Twice a week.
505
00:20:22,617 --> 00:20:24,164
Plus there's the monthly
chat with the plumber,
506
00:20:24,165 --> 00:20:25,276
the daily argument with the super,
507
00:20:25,277 --> 00:20:26,789
paying the maintenance bills... oh, my God.
508
00:20:26,790 --> 00:20:28,137
The bookkeeping alone nearly killed me.
509
00:20:28,138 --> 00:20:29,451
But you'll find out soon enough. See ya!
510
00:20:31,604 --> 00:20:32,723
(Door closes)
511
00:20:33,688 --> 00:20:35,330
(Overlapping shouting)
512
00:20:39,994 --> 00:20:42,465
Congratulations, Wheeler.
You saved tar beach.
513
00:20:43,515 --> 00:20:44,963
And you know, if you squint,
514
00:20:44,964 --> 00:20:46,938
the helicopters kind
of look like fireflies.
515
00:20:47,655 --> 00:20:51,422
So... turns out that politics
really is about compromise.
516
00:20:52,615 --> 00:20:55,015
Marshmallow, madam president?
517
00:20:55,355 --> 00:20:57,139
Oh, my God. How much
fun is this? I love it!
518
00:20:57,140 --> 00:20:58,811
I cannot believe I was
gonna try to shut this down.
519
00:20:58,812 --> 00:21:00,577
Oh, my God, it reminds me
of when I used to go to camp.
520
00:21:00,578 --> 00:21:03,115
I swear, I have a million
stories from camp. A million!
521
00:21:03,561 --> 00:21:04,803
So here's the first one.
522
00:21:04,804 --> 00:21:06,290
One day, when I was seven years old...
523
00:21:06,291 --> 00:21:08,002
I'll give you five bucks to hug Sondra.
524
00:21:08,550 --> 00:21:11,309
For the last time, she
died of natural causes!
525
00:21:11,310 --> 00:21:13,280
(Sondra talking indistinctly)