1 00:00:04,738 --> 00:00:06,217 Raj, your tag's sticking out. 2 00:00:06,373 --> 00:00:09,149 Thank you. That's the closest I've come to sex in, like, two years. 3 00:00:11,578 --> 00:00:13,148 Now I feel a little gross. 4 00:00:13,914 --> 00:00:15,916 You're only making it seem more real for me. 5 00:00:17,918 --> 00:00:19,261 Hey, that's my wife. 6 00:00:19,419 --> 00:00:21,899 If anyone's gonna make her feel gross about sex, it's me. 7 00:00:22,723 --> 00:00:25,761 Can we please talk about something other than my depressing love life? 8 00:00:25,926 --> 00:00:28,031 How about Penny's depressing acting career? 9 00:00:30,364 --> 00:00:33,709 Hey. it's been a little tough, but Penny's following her dreams, 10 00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:36,074 and in my book, that is not depressing. 11 00:00:36,103 --> 00:00:37,605 Aw, thank you. 12 00:00:37,771 --> 00:00:39,944 Is that book called Lies l Tell to Get Sex? 13 00:00:41,508 --> 00:00:44,250 Is that a real book? I would totally read that book. 14 00:00:45,279 --> 00:00:46,952 Can I borrow it when you're done? 15 00:00:51,785 --> 00:00:53,059 Well, I'll have you guys know 16 00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:54,893 I turned down a part in a movie last week. 17 00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:56,227 Why would you do that? 18 00:00:56,290 --> 00:00:57,394 Because it was crap. 19 00:00:57,558 --> 00:01:00,129 It was a sequel to that awful killer gorilla movie I was in. 20 00:01:00,627 --> 00:01:01,935 Serial Ape-ist? 21 00:01:03,697 --> 00:01:05,040 I thought you died in that. 22 00:01:05,198 --> 00:01:06,871 She does. 42 minutes in. 23 00:01:07,034 --> 00:01:10,038 While showering topless, 16 minutes after brief side butt 24 00:01:10,203 --> 00:01:12,080 during a pillow fight with her sorority sisters. 25 00:01:14,441 --> 00:01:17,320 I have an eidetic memory. I don't know what his problem is. 26 00:01:18,645 --> 00:01:20,591 Okay, well, there are no shower scenes in this one. 27 00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:22,226 They just try to clone me from my corpse, 28 00:01:22,382 --> 00:01:24,259 but my DNA gets mixed with the ape's DNA 29 00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:27,126 and I end up running around with giant gorilla hands and feet. 30 00:01:29,489 --> 00:01:32,436 Am I missing something, or isn't that the part she was born to play? 31 00:01:34,161 --> 00:01:36,402 I (THEME SONG PLAYS) 32 00:01:59,686 --> 00:02:02,132 So are you really not gonna do this movie? 33 00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:05,133 Well, I don't think it's the kind of part that's good for my career. 34 00:02:05,425 --> 00:02:09,498 But don't a lot of famous actors get their start doing bad movies? 35 00:02:09,663 --> 00:02:12,041 Okay, I don't think Meryl Streep ever had to say, 36 00:02:12,199 --> 00:02:15,373 "Must keep gorilla hands from killing again!" 37 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:21,552 If she did, it would be amazing. That woman can do no wrong. 38 00:02:23,610 --> 00:02:26,181 I don't know anything about show business, 39 00:02:26,346 --> 00:02:28,724 so if you think it's reasonable to turn down paid work 40 00:02:28,882 --> 00:02:30,361 and just bum through your savings, 41 00:02:30,350 --> 00:02:31,852 I'm sure you know what you're doing. 42 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:39,660 I think we're gonna go. 43 00:02:40,794 --> 00:02:42,501 Are you sure? 44 00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:44,203 We were making fun of failed careers. 45 00:02:44,364 --> 00:02:46,537 We didn't get to tap the juicy vein that is Howard's. 46 00:02:48,335 --> 00:02:50,872 Hey, I work at the same university you do. 47 00:02:51,038 --> 00:02:53,245 Yes, and Hawkeye's in the Avengers, 48 00:02:53,407 --> 00:02:55,250 but no one ever says, "Help, Hawkeye!" 49 00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:59,248 Can I ask you something? 50 00:02:59,413 --> 00:03:01,916 Why do you constantly feel the need to put down my husband? 51 00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:03,720 I'm sure he does it out of love. 52 00:03:03,884 --> 00:03:05,761 The same way my boyfriend makes me feel terrible 53 00:03:05,919 --> 00:03:07,557 about my life choices. 54 00:03:10,257 --> 00:03:11,759 I think we're gonna go. 55 00:03:12,592 --> 00:03:14,435 No, no. This is not a fight. 56 00:03:14,594 --> 00:03:17,507 I was just excited that someone offered you a part 57 00:03:17,664 --> 00:03:19,405 and a little surprised that you'd rather sit at home 58 00:03:19,566 --> 00:03:20,909 and do nothing than take it. 59 00:03:25,439 --> 00:03:26,679 Now it's a fight. 60 00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:29,885 Well, with that sorted out, 61 00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,716 I'm happy to answer your question, Bernadette. 62 00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:33,414 Howard started it. 63 00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:35,625 I didn't do anything. I was just sitting here. 64 00:03:35,782 --> 00:03:37,455 I wasn't referring to this evening. 65 00:03:37,617 --> 00:03:39,722 Ten years ago, upon first seeing me, 66 00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:42,127 your husband claimed that I looked like C-3PO 67 00:03:42,289 --> 00:03:43,927 and Pee-wee Herman. 68 00:03:46,426 --> 00:03:48,963 And he called me C-3P-wee Herman. 69 00:03:51,732 --> 00:03:54,440 Still funny. 70 00:03:56,970 --> 00:03:58,643 That was ten years ago. 71 00:03:59,106 --> 00:04:01,450 Nine years, 11 months and three weeks ago, 72 00:04:01,608 --> 00:04:04,487 he followed that up by replacing the slides for my lecture 73 00:04:04,644 --> 00:04:07,488 with photographs of nude fat women bending over. 74 00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:11,084 Really? 75 00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:12,889 The lecture was on cosmic gas clouds. 76 00:04:12,886 --> 00:04:14,490 That's funny! 77 00:04:16,323 --> 00:04:18,269 I was there. It was funny. 78 00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:25,843 In any event, that began a decade-long progression 79 00:04:25,999 --> 00:04:29,640 of insults, pranks and unwanted magazine subscriptions. 80 00:04:30,170 --> 00:04:31,979 To this day, I still get a monthly copy 81 00:04:32,139 --> 00:04:33,846 of Granny on Granny. 82 00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:37,516 Which, other than its surprisingly fun puzzle page, 83 00:04:37,677 --> 00:04:38,815 is complete filth. 84 00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,656 Thanks for walking me to my car. 85 00:04:45,352 --> 00:04:46,922 Actually, it's for both of us. 86 00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:48,498 Last night, I watched West Side Story, 87 00:04:48,655 --> 00:04:50,532 and I'm a little freaked out by street gangs. 88 00:04:52,425 --> 00:04:55,497 Why can't Raj find a girl? The mystery continues. 89 00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:59,838 I don't appreciate your sarcasm, 90 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:02,446 but we've still got two blocks to go, so I'll put up with it. 91 00:05:04,471 --> 00:05:06,951 Whatever happened with your online dating? 92 00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:10,054 No one was writing me back, so I stopped checking my profile. 93 00:05:10,210 --> 00:05:12,554 Before I met Sheldon, I was ready to give up, too. 94 00:05:12,712 --> 00:05:14,487 Once, I even dropped in on my OB/GYN 95 00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:16,628 just to get some human contact. 96 00:05:17,884 --> 00:05:20,364 It has been a while since I got my prostate checked. 97 00:05:22,022 --> 00:05:25,060 Then I met Sheldon and look at where we are now. 98 00:05:25,625 --> 00:05:28,231 What? You've kissed, like, once in three years. 99 00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:31,805 That's true. Do whatever you want. 100 00:05:35,235 --> 00:05:37,181 -Hey. -Hello. 101 00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:40,549 Listen, I was thinking you and I 102 00:05:40,707 --> 00:05:44,154 could probably try to be better friends. 103 00:05:44,311 --> 00:05:45,813 Really? 104 00:05:45,979 --> 00:05:48,516 I was thinking what we have now is a bit much. 105 00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:56,327 Seriously, I was talking to Bernadette last night and 106 00:05:56,489 --> 00:05:58,560 she made some great points. 107 00:05:58,725 --> 00:06:01,729 You and I have known each other a long time, 108 00:06:01,895 --> 00:06:04,739 and I didn't hear the rest 'cause she took her bra off. 109 00:06:08,902 --> 00:06:10,438 Very well. 110 00:06:10,604 --> 00:06:13,107 How do you propose we move forward? 111 00:06:13,273 --> 00:06:17,050 For starters, we could stop insulting each other. 112 00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:18,780 That's a great idea. 113 00:06:18,945 --> 00:06:20,618 And in the spirit of our new arrangement, 114 00:06:20,780 --> 00:06:23,556 I will mask my surprise that you came up with it. 115 00:06:29,022 --> 00:06:31,468 Anyway, I got invited to do a little talk at NASA 116 00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:33,195 in Houston this weekend. 117 00:06:33,360 --> 00:06:35,806 They gave me two tickets. Bernadette can't go. 118 00:06:35,962 --> 00:06:38,306 You want to come with me? You can visit your mom, 119 00:06:38,465 --> 00:06:40,741 and I'll show you around the space center. 120 00:06:42,269 --> 00:06:43,646 I have one question. 121 00:06:44,604 --> 00:06:47,710 Is this a prank where we land in Houston 122 00:06:47,874 --> 00:06:49,478 and you've made up wanted posters 123 00:06:49,643 --> 00:06:52,419 that have my face with a mustache and a Spanish name 124 00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:55,150 and then I get arrested and deported to South America? 125 00:06:57,651 --> 00:06:58,652 No. 126 00:06:58,818 --> 00:07:00,764 I'm glad because I would not have seen that coming. 127 00:07:04,891 --> 00:07:07,337 Amy, I could use some help. 128 00:07:07,494 --> 00:07:10,100 Let me guess. There's an undergrad in a leather jacket 129 00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:12,265 snapping his fingers by the water fountain. 130 00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:16,410 I thought about what you said last night, 131 00:07:16,569 --> 00:07:18,412 and I went back on the dating website 132 00:07:18,571 --> 00:07:20,812 and I was locking at this girl's profile. 133 00:07:20,974 --> 00:07:22,078 She's amazing. 134 00:07:22,242 --> 00:07:24,415 Oh, she's cute. 135 00:07:24,577 --> 00:07:26,488 And smart. Phi Beta Kappa. 136 00:07:26,646 --> 00:07:28,023 And judging by her lack of Adam's apple, 137 00:07:28,181 --> 00:07:30,092 she's been female her entire life. 138 00:07:33,587 --> 00:07:35,191 I like that in a woman. 139 00:07:36,356 --> 00:07:38,336 Great, so what do you need me for? 140 00:07:38,491 --> 00:07:40,198 Well, I was up all night trying to write to her, 141 00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:42,135 but I wanted to run it by you first. 142 00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:43,706 -All right. 143 00:07:45,532 --> 00:07:46,806 "Emily, 144 00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:50,371 your face is like a precious dew-kissed flower." 145 00:07:50,537 --> 00:07:51,777 Wow. 146 00:07:51,938 --> 00:07:54,384 I know. Powerful stuff, huh? 147 00:07:55,508 --> 00:08:00,651 No. You're supposed to be yourself, not all desperate and creepy. 148 00:08:01,281 --> 00:08:03,386 Okay, I'm getting some mixed messages here. 149 00:08:04,551 --> 00:08:08,192 Just say something normal like, "I saw your profile. 150 00:08:08,355 --> 00:08:10,392 "Looks like we have a lot in common. 151 00:08:10,557 --> 00:08:12,400 Let's get a cup of coffee sometime." 152 00:08:12,559 --> 00:08:16,666 Yes. "Where I can be jealous of the cup touching your ruby lips." 153 00:08:19,466 --> 00:08:20,740 Or you just write it for me. 154 00:08:20,900 --> 00:08:22,311 I'm not gonna pretend to be you. 155 00:08:22,469 --> 00:08:23,971 I don't want you to pretend to be me. 156 00:08:24,137 --> 00:08:26,174 You can be my online wingman. 157 00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:28,910 Like if we met her at a bar and you talked me up. 158 00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:31,050 Well, what would I say to her? 159 00:08:31,311 --> 00:08:33,086 Just tell her what I'm really like. 160 00:08:34,147 --> 00:08:36,423 And, if you think it'll help, 161 00:08:36,583 --> 00:08:38,756 that you saw me changing once and my package reminded you 162 00:08:38,918 --> 00:08:41,228 of the muscular tail of a jaguar. 163 00:08:47,327 --> 00:08:48,897 Use your own words. 164 00:08:52,932 --> 00:08:54,934 Thanks again for taking me to the pharmacy. 165 00:08:55,101 --> 00:08:57,047 It's no problem. Is everything okay? 166 00:08:57,203 --> 00:09:01,015 I'm fine. It's just some stomach medication for my trip. 167 00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:03,882 There's the remote yet distinct possibility 168 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,354 that I may end up in South America. 169 00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:10,884 Remember the old days when I would've said something dumb 170 00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:12,860 like, "Why?" 171 00:09:17,757 --> 00:09:19,293 Uh, that doesn't sound good. 172 00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:22,303 Remember the old days when I used to point out 173 00:09:22,462 --> 00:09:24,135 that your check engine light was on? 174 00:09:25,932 --> 00:09:28,242 -Yes. -Get ready to go down memory lane. 175 00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:31,541 -Penny, your check engine... -Yeah, I know it's on, Sheldon! 176 00:09:31,704 --> 00:09:34,981 Oh, no, no. I cannot afford this right now. 177 00:09:35,642 --> 00:09:37,417 Maybe it's just something minor. 178 00:09:46,152 --> 00:09:47,790 Oh, good news, the light just went out. 179 00:09:54,661 --> 00:09:56,140 Are we playing individual or teams? 180 00:09:56,296 --> 00:09:57,297 Teams are fun. 181 00:09:57,464 --> 00:10:00,411 In that case, I'd like to be partnered with my good friend Howard. 182 00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:04,506 But I'm always on Howards team. Ware best friends. 183 00:10:04,671 --> 00:10:07,845 The kind who finish each others... 184 00:10:11,344 --> 00:10:12,584 I really don't think we do the-- 185 00:10:12,745 --> 00:10:14,418 Do that! See? 186 00:10:16,749 --> 00:10:18,956 -Oh, hi. -How'd it go at the mechanic? 187 00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,530 Not great. Can I talk to you for a sec? 188 00:10:20,687 --> 00:10:22,189 Yeah, sure. 189 00:10:23,523 --> 00:10:26,003 Maybe I can go with you guys to Houston? 190 00:10:26,159 --> 00:10:27,365 Isn't it late to get plane tick-- 191 00:10:27,527 --> 00:10:29,029 Plane tickets? Yeah. 192 00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:32,841 -Will you please sto-- -Stop that? Okay. 193 00:10:35,835 --> 00:10:38,111 I don't know what to do. My car threw a rod and its totaled. 194 00:10:38,271 --> 00:10:39,773 I can't afford a new one, I have no job, 195 00:10:39,939 --> 00:10:41,213 and now I can't drive to auditions. 196 00:10:41,374 --> 00:10:42,978 I'm so sorry. 197 00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:44,850 I know it's a sensitive subject, 198 00:10:45,011 --> 00:10:47,013 but can you reconsider that part in the movie? 199 00:10:47,180 --> 00:10:49,353 I did. I called them. The part's gone. 200 00:10:49,516 --> 00:10:51,189 They gave it to someone else. 201 00:10:51,351 --> 00:10:53,558 Now that girl's gonna get discovered and become famous 202 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:55,722 and go on Letterman and talk about how she got her big break 203 00:10:55,889 --> 00:10:56,890 on a cheap monkey movie 204 00:10:57,056 --> 00:10:59,559 all because some dumb girl thought it was beneath her. 205 00:11:01,561 --> 00:11:03,541 At least they talked about you on Letterman. 206 00:11:06,399 --> 00:11:08,470 Come on, I can drive you wherever you need to go. 207 00:11:08,635 --> 00:11:11,081 How? Unlike me, you have a job. 208 00:11:11,571 --> 00:11:13,744 I'm just gonna have to go back to being a waitress. 209 00:11:13,907 --> 00:11:16,046 Like I will be for the rest of my life. 210 00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:19,016 Leonard, would you wrap it up? We're waiting on you. 211 00:11:19,746 --> 00:11:21,589 I'm sorry, is the fact that my life's falling apart 212 00:11:21,748 --> 00:11:23,694 interfering with your board game? 213 00:11:24,350 --> 00:11:25,761 It is. 214 00:11:28,755 --> 00:11:31,668 You were wrong, friend Howard. She completely understood. 215 00:11:36,196 --> 00:11:37,334 Hey, you busy? 216 00:11:37,497 --> 00:11:38,601 No. What's up? 217 00:11:38,765 --> 00:11:40,711 Have you heard back from Emily? 218 00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:41,868 I have. 219 00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:43,571 Great! And? 220 00:11:43,736 --> 00:11:46,740 And I'm afraid she doesn't think you're right for her. 221 00:11:48,875 --> 00:11:51,754 I give you one simple thing to do. 222 00:11:51,911 --> 00:11:54,517 Contact a complete stranger and make her fall in love with me, 223 00:11:54,681 --> 00:11:56,126 and you blow it! 224 00:11:57,517 --> 00:11:59,428 I told her what a good guy you are, 225 00:11:59,586 --> 00:12:01,759 but she thought it was a bad sign 226 00:12:01,921 --> 00:12:03,867 that you didn't write to her yourself. 227 00:12:04,023 --> 00:12:08,028 She thought it made you seem too shy and passive. 228 00:12:08,194 --> 00:12:09,537 I'm not too shy and passive. 229 00:12:09,696 --> 00:12:11,937 You write her back and tell her I said that. 230 00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:15,140 You know, when you have a second. 231 00:12:16,603 --> 00:12:19,140 Look, I'll see if I can change her mind tomorrow night. 232 00:12:19,305 --> 00:12:20,750 What's happening tomorrow night? 233 00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:22,648 I'm meeting her for coffee. 234 00:12:23,309 --> 00:12:24,310 What? 235 00:12:24,477 --> 00:12:27,151 We emailed back and forth a bit, and we kind of hit it off. 236 00:12:27,313 --> 00:12:29,224 I find a girl I like, and you're stealing her? 237 00:12:29,382 --> 00:12:31,726 No. We just ended up having a lot in common. 238 00:12:31,884 --> 00:12:33,659 We went to Harvard, we like Chaucer, 239 00:12:33,820 --> 00:12:36,494 were both hardcore into quilting. 240 00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:43,301 Your words fall like acid rain on the wounded petals of my heart. 241 00:12:46,499 --> 00:12:49,446 That's Sheldon. He says he'll be down in a minute. 242 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,412 -What are you doing? 243 00:12:52,472 --> 00:12:54,008 He's not coming out until he sees proof 244 00:12:54,173 --> 00:12:56,346 you don't have an air freshener in your car. 245 00:12:58,578 --> 00:13:00,785 This is gonna be a long weekend for you. 246 00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:02,654 You're the reason I'm doing it! 247 00:13:02,815 --> 00:13:04,624 I said to stop insulting each other. 248 00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:07,321 I didn't tell you to take him on a romantic getaway. 249 00:13:09,188 --> 00:13:10,690 How do I know what you said? 250 00:13:10,857 --> 00:13:13,701 Damn you and your noise-cancelling breasts. 251 00:13:16,696 --> 00:13:18,642 -Hello. -Hey, buddy. 252 00:13:20,366 --> 00:13:21,640 You excited for Texas? 253 00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:23,371 Oh, very much so. 254 00:13:23,536 --> 00:13:27,006 It's not every day you get to tour NASA with a real astronaut. 255 00:13:27,173 --> 00:13:29,278 Who's the real astronaut? 256 00:13:32,845 --> 00:13:35,382 -Buzz Aldrin. -Oh. Yay! 257 00:13:49,295 --> 00:13:51,468 Howard? Howard? 258 00:13:52,198 --> 00:13:53,700 Howard? 259 00:13:56,469 --> 00:13:57,846 What now? 260 00:13:58,971 --> 00:14:00,006 I have to go to the bathroom. 261 00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:01,379 You just went to the bathroom. 262 00:14:01,541 --> 00:14:03,919 I didn't use it because it didn't seem safe. 263 00:14:05,078 --> 00:14:07,752 Despite all my emails, the toilet didn't have a seatbelt. 264 00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:11,829 Well, it still doesn't. 265 00:14:11,984 --> 00:14:13,156 I realize that, 266 00:14:13,319 --> 00:14:16,493 but safety concerns went out the window two apple juices ago. 267 00:14:18,057 --> 00:14:19,434 Fine. 268 00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:22,332 Why are you getting annoyed? 269 00:14:22,495 --> 00:14:24,771 I'm trying to be a better friend, 270 00:14:24,931 --> 00:14:28,936 but you constantly say and do irritating things. 271 00:14:29,102 --> 00:14:30,706 -Like when? -When? 272 00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:34,113 How about in the car? I'm an astronaut, and you know it. 273 00:14:34,273 --> 00:14:37,254 You just don't like admitting it, because you're jealous. 274 00:14:39,912 --> 00:14:42,756 Well, truth be told, 275 00:14:42,915 --> 00:14:45,395 as a child, I did dream of going to space. 276 00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:47,553 Those astronauts were my heroes. 277 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:52,032 And when you got to go, it was hard for me. 278 00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:56,099 Thank you. 279 00:14:56,262 --> 00:14:58,708 Because it made me realize they'll just send anyone up there. 280 00:15:01,801 --> 00:15:03,542 -Aren't you going to let me out? -No. 281 00:15:03,703 --> 00:15:05,580 But I still need to use the bathroom. 282 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,479 Here you go. Be creative. 283 00:15:11,310 --> 00:15:13,449 What's the matter? Scared of a little turbulence? 284 00:15:13,946 --> 00:15:17,223 No, turbulence is just the equalization 285 00:15:17,383 --> 00:15:20,091 of diurnal temperature variations in the atmosphere. 286 00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:21,789 I'm not scared at all. 287 00:15:22,555 --> 00:15:24,557 Oh, apple juice, stay where you are. 288 00:15:26,592 --> 00:15:29,004 Oh, this is nothing. I experienced way worse 289 00:15:29,162 --> 00:15:30,903 when I was plummeting back to Earth, 290 00:15:31,063 --> 00:15:33,669 apparently not being a real astronaut. 291 00:15:36,002 --> 00:15:37,675 Okay, that was a big ons. 292 00:15:39,839 --> 00:15:41,250 I take it back. I'm scared of turbulence! 293 00:15:41,407 --> 00:15:42,943 I'm gonna need that bag back. 294 00:15:46,979 --> 00:15:48,253 You sure you want to do this? 295 00:15:48,414 --> 00:15:50,451 Yeah. Why wouldn't I want to get my old job back? 296 00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:52,027 It'll be fun to see everyone. 297 00:15:52,185 --> 00:15:54,131 I haven't talked to them since I said, "I quit. 298 00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:56,028 See you at the Oscars, bitches." 299 00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:59,531 Come on, let's just get this over with. 300 00:15:59,692 --> 00:16:00,932 "Let's get this over with." 301 00:16:01,094 --> 00:16:02,664 Am I driving you to the Cheesecake Factory, 302 00:16:02,829 --> 00:16:04,467 or are we having sex? 303 00:16:06,165 --> 00:16:07,542 I'm just trying to lighten the mood. 304 00:16:07,700 --> 00:16:09,270 -I know. Thank you. -Sorry. 305 00:16:09,435 --> 00:16:11,039 It's just so humiliating. 306 00:16:11,204 --> 00:16:12,649 So humiliating? 307 00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,375 Am I driving you to the Cheesecake Factory....? 308 00:16:14,540 --> 00:16:16,520 I'm sorry. I'll stop. I'll stop. 309 00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:21,819 Come on, don't look so sad. You never know what's gonna happen. 310 00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,289 Maybe tonight will be great. 311 00:16:23,449 --> 00:16:25,190 Sweetie, I know you're trying to make me feel better, 312 00:16:25,351 --> 00:16:27,058 and I love you for that, but it's making me feel worse, 313 00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:28,665 and I kind of hate you. 314 00:16:31,724 --> 00:16:32,896 This isn't your car. 315 00:16:33,059 --> 00:16:35,505 I know. I thought we'd take yours. 316 00:16:38,531 --> 00:16:39,703 I don't understand. 317 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,139 It's nothing fancy, but it'll get you to auditions, 318 00:16:43,302 --> 00:16:45,748 and at least for now, you don't have to go back to waitressing. 319 00:16:48,808 --> 00:16:50,378 I don't know what to say. 320 00:16:52,378 --> 00:16:53,857 Don't say anything. 321 00:16:54,147 --> 00:16:55,421 Oh, my God. 322 00:16:56,916 --> 00:16:59,590 I mean, you could say, "Thank you." I did just buy you a car. 323 00:17:04,924 --> 00:17:08,269 Lock, I admit that it's odd that Rajesh didn't write to you himself, 324 00:17:08,427 --> 00:17:12,898 but if you get to know him, you'll see he's just a sweet, regular guy. 325 00:17:13,065 --> 00:17:16,069 As a counterpoint, here he ls, uninvited and visibly sweaty. 326 00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:18,272 -Hello, Emily. -Hello. 327 00:17:18,437 --> 00:17:22,283 Amy told me you were concerned that I might be too passive and shy. 328 00:17:22,441 --> 00:17:23,943 Let me ask you something. 329 00:17:24,110 --> 00:17:28,456 Would a passive guy barge in here to look you in the eye and say, 330 00:17:28,614 --> 00:17:30,924 "Hey, dew-kissed flower, what's up?" 331 00:17:35,354 --> 00:17:38,267 No, but a weird guy with no boundaries might. 332 00:17:38,424 --> 00:17:40,028 Okay, that's a separate issue. 333 00:17:40,193 --> 00:17:42,867 Let's put a pin in that and just focus on the passive thing. 334 00:17:43,029 --> 00:17:44,235 I'm leaving. 335 00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:46,434 Are we still going to go to that Chaucer reading Friday? 336 00:17:46,599 --> 00:17:48,272 You know, I think I'm just gonna go by myself. 337 00:17:52,138 --> 00:17:53,981 Not my best first date. 338 00:17:56,542 --> 00:17:58,078 Yeah, but not my worst, either. 339 00:18:02,815 --> 00:18:04,817 I'm sorry for every mean thing I ever did or said to you! 340 00:18:04,984 --> 00:18:07,123 I'm sorry, too! It's all my fault! 341 00:18:08,821 --> 00:18:11,495 If you weren't my friend, there'd be a hole in my life! 342 00:18:11,657 --> 00:18:13,068 Thank you, Sheldon. 343 00:18:13,225 --> 00:18:15,432 Kind of like when Firefly was cancelled. 344 00:18:17,129 --> 00:18:18,472 But not as big. 345 00:18:26,138 --> 00:18:28,448 The captain has turned off the fasten seat belt sign. 346 00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:30,679 You're now free to move about the cabin. 347 00:18:32,178 --> 00:18:33,987 -It's over. -Yeah. 348 00:18:37,149 --> 00:18:39,925 Should we stop holding hands now? 349 00:18:42,588 --> 00:18:44,295 -In a minute. -Okay, good.