1 00:00:15,987 --> 00:00:17,120 Heh. 2 00:00:17,121 --> 00:00:21,121 ♪ The Simpsons 25x13 ♪ The Man Who Grew Too Much Original Air Date on March 9, 2014 3 00:00:21,122 --> 00:00:24,222 == sync, corrected by elderman == @elder_man 4 00:00:24,295 --> 00:00:27,497 Neptune-- eighth planet from the sun. 5 00:00:27,565 --> 00:00:30,600 A mystery now, we hope to have close-up photos 6 00:00:30,635 --> 00:00:32,135 from Voyager 2 7 00:00:32,169 --> 00:00:34,537 in 1989. 8 00:00:34,572 --> 00:00:36,239 We do have them! 9 00:00:36,274 --> 00:00:37,707 They're my home screen! 10 00:00:37,742 --> 00:00:40,277 Miss Hoover, once again, the lesson plan I prepared 11 00:00:40,311 --> 00:00:42,245 would have covered this topic much better. 12 00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:43,780 But I can see... 13 00:00:46,851 --> 00:00:48,151 Miss Hoover? 14 00:00:48,185 --> 00:00:49,986 It's Tuesday, Lisa. 15 00:00:50,021 --> 00:00:51,421 Taco Tuesday. 16 00:00:52,957 --> 00:00:53,890 Huh? 17 00:00:53,925 --> 00:00:54,891 Huh? 18 00:00:56,127 --> 00:00:59,296 Taco Tuesday! Taco Tuesday! 19 00:00:59,330 --> 00:01:01,798 Taco Tuesday! 20 00:01:01,832 --> 00:01:06,069 Taco Tuesday, Taco Tuesday... 21 00:01:07,171 --> 00:01:09,239 Oh, no. I'm about to become 22 00:01:09,273 --> 00:01:11,574 another moppin' statistic. 23 00:01:14,145 --> 00:01:17,147 There's only room for one of us, Ethel. 24 00:01:35,266 --> 00:01:37,334 Bart, that's your sixth taco. 25 00:01:37,368 --> 00:01:39,903 You know, Whitman says, "If anything is sacred, 26 00:01:39,937 --> 00:01:41,938 the human body is sacred." 27 00:01:41,973 --> 00:01:44,541 Fascinating. 28 00:01:45,376 --> 00:01:46,509 Congratulations, boys. 29 00:01:46,544 --> 00:01:47,978 You made it through 30 00:01:48,012 --> 00:01:50,013 another Taco Tuesday. 31 00:01:50,047 --> 00:01:52,349 Back in the bucket till next week. 32 00:01:52,383 --> 00:01:54,718 Won't those vegetables go bad? 33 00:01:54,752 --> 00:01:57,988 Nope. They're genetically modified to stay fresh. 34 00:01:58,022 --> 00:02:00,390 Just don't ask how old the Jell-O is. 35 00:02:00,424 --> 00:02:02,359 Ew. 36 00:02:03,928 --> 00:02:05,929 Overreactor.org warns that over half 37 00:02:05,963 --> 00:02:08,732 of the vegetables sold in this country are 38 00:02:08,766 --> 00:02:11,368 genetically modified organisms 39 00:02:11,402 --> 00:02:13,103 whose effect on humans is... 40 00:02:13,137 --> 00:02:14,871 unknown. 41 00:02:16,007 --> 00:02:19,275 Whoa! Mom, you made me overswipe! 42 00:02:19,310 --> 00:02:22,545 Your parents' credit card has been charged $20. 43 00:02:24,682 --> 00:02:26,583 I have to get to the church. 44 00:02:26,617 --> 00:02:29,452 Helen Lovejoy is posting the spring volunteer sign-up sheet. 45 00:02:29,487 --> 00:02:32,889 In five minutes, every good task will be taken. 46 00:02:32,923 --> 00:02:34,190 Dang it! 47 00:02:36,427 --> 00:02:37,727 Jasper Beardley! 48 00:02:37,762 --> 00:02:39,396 You'll never make it! 49 00:02:43,701 --> 00:02:45,001 No! 50 00:02:52,443 --> 00:02:54,210 Ooh... 51 00:03:01,952 --> 00:03:03,053 Oh! 52 00:03:05,222 --> 00:03:06,756 What the hell is this thing? 53 00:03:08,359 --> 00:03:09,492 Bake sale-- taken. 54 00:03:09,527 --> 00:03:11,528 Candle snuffing-- taken. 55 00:03:11,562 --> 00:03:14,431 Baby shusher, miscellaneous choir support. 56 00:03:14,465 --> 00:03:16,766 Everything's taken! All that's left is... 57 00:03:16,801 --> 00:03:18,535 Teen abstinence counseling. 58 00:03:18,569 --> 00:03:20,303 You get to pass out abstinence pledges 59 00:03:20,337 --> 00:03:22,939 and make sure the kids sign their John Han-bleeps. 60 00:03:24,642 --> 00:03:27,777 But, Ned, saying nay is your thing. 61 00:03:27,812 --> 00:03:29,012 Not this month. 62 00:03:29,046 --> 00:03:30,914 Edna signed us up for a tango class. 63 00:03:30,948 --> 00:03:34,050 It was the only way I could avert... wine-tasting. 64 00:03:34,085 --> 00:03:38,388 Look, I'm really not comfortable talking about S-E-X 65 00:03:38,422 --> 00:03:40,390 with K-I-D-S. 66 00:03:40,424 --> 00:03:42,225 Language. 67 00:03:42,259 --> 00:03:43,927 Oh, it's not that hard. Just tell them 68 00:03:43,961 --> 00:03:46,062 that God wants them to ignore everything in their bodies 69 00:03:46,097 --> 00:03:47,330 that God is making happen. 70 00:03:47,364 --> 00:03:49,599 We took the pledge! 71 00:03:49,633 --> 00:03:51,734 We won't have sex until we're married! 72 00:03:51,769 --> 00:03:53,570 To each other! 73 00:03:55,206 --> 00:03:58,475 Mm, their skipping lessons are really paying off. 74 00:03:58,509 --> 00:03:59,976 Hello. Hello. 75 00:04:01,445 --> 00:04:04,280 I'm-I'm Marge Simpson, and I'm here to talk 76 00:04:04,315 --> 00:04:07,817 about a... a-a wonderful, beautiful thing. 77 00:04:07,852 --> 00:04:09,752 Speaking of beautiful things, 78 00:04:09,787 --> 00:04:11,187 tongue me, babe. 79 00:04:19,797 --> 00:04:22,265 How many of you are here for the free cookies? 80 00:04:22,299 --> 00:04:23,867 Because we've discontinued that. 81 00:04:23,901 --> 00:04:25,668 I'm out of here. Forget you! 82 00:04:25,703 --> 00:04:27,670 One of our brightest and most meddlesome students 83 00:04:27,705 --> 00:04:29,405 called this meeting-- somehow-- 84 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:31,875 to discuss an urgent menu matter. Lisa? 85 00:04:31,909 --> 00:04:35,111 Our school cafeteria is serving GMOs-- 86 00:04:35,146 --> 00:04:36,946 genetically modified organisms. 87 00:04:38,149 --> 00:04:40,083 Now, in order to thoroughly explore the issue, 88 00:04:40,117 --> 00:04:43,520 I'd like to play the first video that came up in my Web browser 89 00:04:43,554 --> 00:04:45,788 when I typed in "GMO" plus "danger" 90 00:04:45,823 --> 00:04:47,223 plus "question mark." 91 00:04:47,258 --> 00:04:49,292 Hear, hear! 92 00:04:51,896 --> 00:04:54,497 If there's one thing scientists love, it's money. 93 00:04:54,532 --> 00:04:56,132 Money, money, money. 94 00:04:56,167 --> 00:04:57,867 And that's been true of scientists 95 00:04:57,902 --> 00:05:00,170 ever since caveman times. 96 00:05:00,204 --> 00:05:02,639 We need look no further back than the ancient Mayans, 97 00:05:02,673 --> 00:05:04,541 who crossbred plants and animals 98 00:05:04,575 --> 00:05:07,644 in an unholy experiment in what is now a resort 99 00:05:07,678 --> 00:05:10,480 that charges $30 a night to valet park. 100 00:05:10,514 --> 00:05:12,982 Once you're there, they've gotcha. 101 00:05:14,351 --> 00:05:15,885 The Mayans didn't listen... 102 00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:17,820 to themselves. 103 00:05:17,855 --> 00:05:20,323 Yet today, we toy with our fate 104 00:05:20,357 --> 00:05:22,158 by using retroviruses 105 00:05:22,193 --> 00:05:25,195 to create these so-called "super foods." 106 00:05:25,229 --> 00:05:27,197 Are we doomed to repeat an event 107 00:05:27,231 --> 00:05:29,732 that destroyed all human life? 108 00:05:29,767 --> 00:05:32,302 The answer is in your mouth! 109 00:05:36,407 --> 00:05:40,109 Um, that video seemed a little unscientific. 110 00:05:40,144 --> 00:05:43,913 My name is Jenny McCarthy, and I endorse this tirade. 111 00:05:43,948 --> 00:05:46,082 Oh, my God, it's worse than I thought. 112 00:05:46,116 --> 00:05:49,118 Everybody wait here while I do some actual research. 113 00:05:49,153 --> 00:05:51,387 Nobody form any opinions while I'm gone. 114 00:05:51,422 --> 00:05:53,723 Well, hurry, we have no minds of our own. 115 00:05:55,893 --> 00:05:58,828 I say we do not categorically ban 116 00:05:58,862 --> 00:06:01,197 genetically modified organisms. 117 00:06:01,232 --> 00:06:02,298 What?! 118 00:06:02,333 --> 00:06:04,367 Well, GMOs are resistant to pests, 119 00:06:04,401 --> 00:06:05,768 disease and drought. 120 00:06:05,803 --> 00:06:07,570 It's just possible that GMOs 121 00:06:07,605 --> 00:06:10,139 can actually end world hunger. 122 00:06:10,174 --> 00:06:13,876 I say, let's get these GMOs inside our children pronto! 123 00:06:13,911 --> 00:06:15,111 Way ahead of you! 124 00:06:20,918 --> 00:06:22,552 I'm eating the food of the future. 125 00:06:22,586 --> 00:06:25,555 Beep, boop. What is love? 126 00:06:25,589 --> 00:06:27,223 Boop, beep, boop. 127 00:06:27,258 --> 00:06:28,891 Lisa, I'd like to thank you 128 00:06:28,926 --> 00:06:30,460 for mollifying these land apes. 129 00:06:30,494 --> 00:06:32,929 We'd like you and your family to visit us 130 00:06:32,963 --> 00:06:34,731 at the Monsarno research campus. 131 00:06:34,765 --> 00:06:37,467 Ooh, campus! Do you have a statue of the founder 132 00:06:37,501 --> 00:06:39,435 I can stick a funny hat on? 133 00:06:41,338 --> 00:06:42,972 Go, go, go! 134 00:06:46,010 --> 00:06:47,076 Simpsons, we're trying 135 00:06:47,111 --> 00:06:50,446 to change the world one molecule at a time. 136 00:06:50,481 --> 00:06:52,448 Sounds like that would take a while. 137 00:06:52,483 --> 00:06:53,816 Ooh, you're right. 138 00:06:53,851 --> 00:06:56,352 Everyone, three molecules at a time. 139 00:06:56,387 --> 00:06:58,821 Oh, you got to be kidding me! 140 00:06:58,856 --> 00:07:00,657 I'll be home late, honey. 141 00:07:00,691 --> 00:07:02,992 Yeah. Three molecules now. 142 00:07:03,027 --> 00:07:04,527 Well, it's nice to see for once 143 00:07:04,561 --> 00:07:07,563 a corporation that does good work and cares about people. 144 00:07:07,598 --> 00:07:10,600 Yes, Lisa, we finally put to bed the silly notion 145 00:07:10,634 --> 00:07:12,902 that our company is in any way evil. 146 00:07:12,936 --> 00:07:15,838 Now, say hello to our chief scientist. 147 00:07:17,875 --> 00:07:19,676 Sideshow Bob! 148 00:07:19,710 --> 00:07:21,277 Dr. Sideshow Bob. 149 00:07:21,312 --> 00:07:23,012 Real doctor or PhD? 150 00:07:23,047 --> 00:07:23,980 PhD. 151 00:07:26,746 --> 00:07:29,001 All right, I'll leave you and Bob 152 00:07:29,002 --> 00:07:30,836 in this locked room to get reacquainted. 153 00:07:32,372 --> 00:07:33,438 Simpsons, 154 00:07:33,473 --> 00:07:35,707 there's no need for alarm. 155 00:07:38,611 --> 00:07:40,913 That's not for you to suck! 156 00:07:40,947 --> 00:07:42,681 Now... where was I? 157 00:07:42,715 --> 00:07:44,683 Right. Uh, no need to worry. 158 00:07:44,717 --> 00:07:46,685 I'm still technically shawshanking it 159 00:07:46,719 --> 00:07:48,654 at Springfield Penitentiary. 160 00:07:48,688 --> 00:07:49,988 This is getting boring. 161 00:07:50,023 --> 00:07:52,457 Either murder us or tell us how you got here. 162 00:07:52,492 --> 00:07:53,825 Very well. 163 00:07:55,295 --> 00:07:58,797 The inanity of the vanity license plate puns 164 00:07:58,831 --> 00:08:01,166 was slowly driving me mad. 165 00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:03,235 So when Monsarno Labs asked for experimental subjects, 166 00:08:03,269 --> 00:08:05,571 I... gladly volunteered. 167 00:08:15,615 --> 00:08:17,049 My job was to make sure the experiments 168 00:08:17,083 --> 00:08:19,518 wouldn't be too painful for the test monkeys. 169 00:08:26,225 --> 00:08:27,626 I don't know what we're doing here. 170 00:08:27,660 --> 00:08:29,494 Uh, we'll pick it up after lunch. 171 00:08:38,338 --> 00:08:41,273 I wrote up my results and went from subject... 172 00:08:41,307 --> 00:08:43,041 to scientist. 173 00:08:44,377 --> 00:08:46,345 Look at me! 174 00:08:46,379 --> 00:08:48,280 I'm Sideshow Bob! 175 00:08:48,314 --> 00:08:49,948 Sideshow Bob! 176 00:08:49,983 --> 00:08:51,850 Foolish boy! That's phosphoric acid! 177 00:08:53,086 --> 00:08:54,319 A mere sip would have dissolved 178 00:08:54,354 --> 00:08:56,655 a hole in your stomach the size of a silver dollar. 179 00:08:56,689 --> 00:08:58,090 Yakety, yakety, yak. 180 00:08:58,124 --> 00:08:59,958 "The spotted hawk accuses me, 181 00:08:59,993 --> 00:09:01,827 he complains of my gab." 182 00:09:01,861 --> 00:09:05,631 "I too am not a bit tamed, I too am untranslatable." 183 00:09:05,665 --> 00:09:08,233 Walt Whitman. Leaves of Grass. 184 00:09:08,267 --> 00:09:10,669 Very good. Lisa, you always were 185 00:09:10,703 --> 00:09:14,239 the one rose petal floating atop the cesspool 186 00:09:14,273 --> 00:09:15,907 that is the Simpsons. 187 00:09:15,942 --> 00:09:17,709 - Well! - That's mean. 188 00:09:17,744 --> 00:09:19,544 Oh... 189 00:09:19,579 --> 00:09:23,081 If you're done, our chief scientist has to get back to work. 190 00:09:23,116 --> 00:09:25,884 Our corn on the cob has become self-aware. 191 00:09:25,918 --> 00:09:27,953 Wait! Wait! Won't you visit me again? 192 00:09:27,987 --> 00:09:31,123 Let me show you I really am trying to make a better world. 193 00:09:31,157 --> 00:09:33,125 Lisa, we can talk Walt Whitman. 194 00:09:33,159 --> 00:09:35,127 And, Homer, I think you'd enjoy the company 195 00:09:35,161 --> 00:09:37,629 of the campus' lazy, overfed squirrels. 196 00:09:37,664 --> 00:09:40,399 "Overfed"? I don't know this word. 197 00:09:49,575 --> 00:09:51,710 Visit me, Lisa. We can discuss poetry, 198 00:09:51,744 --> 00:09:55,547 fine art, and... and if we must, jazz. 199 00:09:55,581 --> 00:09:58,016 Mom, can I visit Sideshow Bob? 200 00:09:58,051 --> 00:09:59,951 Why would you want to do that? 201 00:09:59,986 --> 00:10:01,586 He's tried to kill us! 202 00:10:01,621 --> 00:10:03,755 You. He tried to kill you. 203 00:10:03,790 --> 00:10:05,891 And I refuse to concede a mind that thinks 204 00:10:05,925 --> 00:10:08,060 so much like mine can be all bad. 205 00:10:08,094 --> 00:10:11,630 Don't you think the parts that aren't evil are a little, mm... 206 00:10:11,664 --> 00:10:12,931 pretentious? 207 00:10:12,965 --> 00:10:15,333 Absolutely. We're talking about Lisa, right? 208 00:10:15,368 --> 00:10:17,369 Shut up! You shut up! 209 00:10:17,403 --> 00:10:20,338 This is the pinnacle of conversation around here! 210 00:10:20,373 --> 00:10:21,640 Fine, I'll take you. 211 00:10:21,674 --> 00:10:23,208 They have this cool psych class 212 00:10:23,242 --> 00:10:25,310 at the campus I sat in on. 213 00:10:25,344 --> 00:10:28,313 Uh, that was a sexual harassment seminar. 214 00:10:28,347 --> 00:10:30,449 It doesn't matter-- I'm taking it pass-fail. 215 00:10:33,953 --> 00:10:36,588 Blowing off steam in the crafts room, Marge? 216 00:10:36,622 --> 00:10:39,658 No! I'm not giving up on reaching those kids, 217 00:10:39,692 --> 00:10:41,893 and I might just have a secret weapon. 218 00:10:41,928 --> 00:10:43,662 Mm-hmm. Is it finger puppets? 219 00:10:43,696 --> 00:10:45,497 Maybe! 220 00:10:45,531 --> 00:10:47,933 Well, we haven't had finger puppets in this church 221 00:10:47,967 --> 00:10:50,435 since Reverend Brogan was arrested. 222 00:10:50,470 --> 00:10:53,605 But I suppose enough time has passed. 223 00:10:53,639 --> 00:10:55,640 And that's why Nancy No 224 00:10:55,675 --> 00:10:58,844 is the most popular girl in Promiseville High. 225 00:10:58,878 --> 00:11:02,447 Mm. I prefer the modern thinking of Yolanda Yes. 226 00:11:02,482 --> 00:11:05,817 And I think I'd have a shot with Mabel Maybe. 227 00:11:08,020 --> 00:11:11,623 I'm so tired of those kids sniggering. 228 00:11:11,657 --> 00:11:14,459 Uh-oh. It's Horndog Hank. 229 00:11:14,494 --> 00:11:16,895 Well, Nancy knows how to keep him away. 230 00:11:18,865 --> 00:11:20,799 Darn it, they're stuck. 231 00:11:27,039 --> 00:11:31,943 Um, can I take one of those girl puppets home? 232 00:11:31,978 --> 00:11:33,678 I won't do nothin' to it. 233 00:11:33,713 --> 00:11:35,013 Oh! 234 00:11:36,415 --> 00:11:37,949 ♪ You say modified tomato 235 00:11:37,984 --> 00:11:39,851 ♪ I say modified tomahto 236 00:11:39,886 --> 00:11:43,155 ♪ I say engineered potato, you say engineered potahto ♪ 237 00:11:43,189 --> 00:11:45,023 ♪ Potato! ♪ Potahto! 238 00:11:45,057 --> 00:11:47,159 ♪ Tomato! ♪ Tomahto! 239 00:11:47,193 --> 00:11:49,194 ♪ Let's splice some DNA! 240 00:11:56,569 --> 00:11:59,504 That is my first non-evil laugh in years. 241 00:11:59,539 --> 00:12:00,705 Bob, 242 00:12:00,740 --> 00:12:02,607 there's one thing I got to know. 243 00:12:02,642 --> 00:12:04,810 Are you plotting revenge? 244 00:12:04,844 --> 00:12:07,679 I don't plot revenge anymore. 245 00:12:07,713 --> 00:12:09,948 It's like love. If it happens, it happens. 246 00:12:09,982 --> 00:12:11,983 Now, how about those s'mores? 247 00:12:15,087 --> 00:12:18,390 Dad! You already ate all the chocolate bars. 248 00:12:18,424 --> 00:12:21,459 That's why I got to get the marshmallows down fast. 249 00:12:22,662 --> 00:12:24,329 I like how they cut them down 250 00:12:24,363 --> 00:12:26,064 from 140 characters 251 00:12:26,098 --> 00:12:28,700 to a more manageable 20 characters. 252 00:12:28,734 --> 00:12:31,136 Oh, another seminar tomorrow. 253 00:12:31,170 --> 00:12:34,072 I just wish I could connect with those teenagers, 254 00:12:34,106 --> 00:12:36,641 since it seems like we'll never have any. 255 00:12:36,676 --> 00:12:38,276 Oh, Marge, 256 00:12:38,311 --> 00:12:40,579 teens can't control their urges. 257 00:12:40,613 --> 00:12:43,815 It's why there's never been a teenage president. 258 00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:46,218 Are you saying I'm wasting my time? 259 00:12:46,252 --> 00:12:49,187 No. I'm saying you're wasting everyone's time. 260 00:12:49,222 --> 00:12:51,590 But it's a church thing, so that's a given. 261 00:12:51,624 --> 00:12:53,091 Oh. Well, then maybe 262 00:12:53,125 --> 00:12:55,360 I need to give those kids a better example. 263 00:12:55,394 --> 00:12:56,728 Good night! 264 00:12:56,762 --> 00:12:59,731 Shut your eyes. They're too bright. 265 00:12:59,765 --> 00:13:01,233 Sorry. 266 00:13:02,602 --> 00:13:05,770 Kids, today, we have a very special guest-- 267 00:13:05,805 --> 00:13:08,406 my husband. 268 00:13:08,441 --> 00:13:09,574 I brought Homer here 269 00:13:09,609 --> 00:13:11,276 to show that we can, 270 00:13:11,310 --> 00:13:14,913 and have, abstained for two whole days. 271 00:13:14,947 --> 00:13:17,449 Two days? That's all? 272 00:13:17,483 --> 00:13:20,318 That means, three days ago, the two of you 273 00:13:20,353 --> 00:13:22,587 made the blob with two backs! 274 00:13:22,622 --> 00:13:24,055 Listen, you punks, 275 00:13:24,090 --> 00:13:26,758 if you can't handle the image of our naked bodies 276 00:13:26,792 --> 00:13:29,361 in the tender act of a-oo-ga, 277 00:13:29,395 --> 00:13:33,131 you should never have come to the basement of this holy place. 278 00:13:33,165 --> 00:13:35,400 Ugh! He's touching her! 279 00:13:35,434 --> 00:13:37,602 They're practically doin' it here! 280 00:13:37,637 --> 00:13:38,203 Ugh! 281 00:13:43,242 --> 00:13:44,709 I'll sign the pledge! 282 00:13:44,744 --> 00:13:47,312 Just get your fat heaving buttocks out of my head! 283 00:13:47,346 --> 00:13:48,613 Never! 284 00:13:51,317 --> 00:13:54,986 All right, Bob, you've created 5,000 patents, 285 00:13:55,021 --> 00:13:57,188 so... one hour of freedom. 286 00:13:57,223 --> 00:13:59,658 But remember, your every move will be watched 287 00:13:59,692 --> 00:14:01,993 by these unarmed docents. 288 00:14:02,028 --> 00:14:04,896 That block's gonna need its own ticket. 289 00:14:04,931 --> 00:14:06,731 I have a family membership. 290 00:14:06,766 --> 00:14:09,567 Well, if that's your kid, kiss it. 291 00:14:10,903 --> 00:14:12,103 Mmm. 292 00:14:14,340 --> 00:14:16,074 What next? 293 00:14:16,108 --> 00:14:17,475 Proto-Cubists? 294 00:14:17,510 --> 00:14:19,311 The Pointillists? 295 00:14:19,345 --> 00:14:22,147 Or the alleged art of Itchy and Scratchy? 296 00:14:22,181 --> 00:14:24,749 Ooh, ooh, I like the Impressionists. 297 00:14:24,784 --> 00:14:27,252 The boy bands of the art world. 298 00:14:27,286 --> 00:14:31,756 But for you, Lisa, I shall face the Renoir with sangfroid. 299 00:14:31,791 --> 00:14:33,491 Warmer. Calder. 300 00:14:33,526 --> 00:14:35,427 Warmer. Warmer. Calder. 301 00:14:35,461 --> 00:14:36,594 Calder. Calder! 302 00:14:36,629 --> 00:14:39,597 That's using your $300,000 M.F.A. 303 00:14:47,340 --> 00:14:48,540 To the Calder mobile! 304 00:14:48,574 --> 00:14:49,975 Ugh! 305 00:14:50,009 --> 00:14:52,877 Bob, you saved me! 306 00:14:52,912 --> 00:14:54,646 But how did you get the strength? 307 00:14:54,680 --> 00:14:57,082 Calder's work in this period was marked by heavy use 308 00:14:57,116 --> 00:14:59,651 of sheet metal painted to look deceptively airy. 309 00:14:59,685 --> 00:15:00,485 Well put. 310 00:15:00,519 --> 00:15:01,886 Thank you. 311 00:15:01,921 --> 00:15:03,154 Answer the question. 312 00:15:03,189 --> 00:15:05,957 Well... there is something I should have told you. 313 00:15:05,992 --> 00:15:07,625 You see, it occurred to me 314 00:15:07,660 --> 00:15:10,395 that if I can genetically modify fruits and vegetables, 315 00:15:10,429 --> 00:15:13,031 why can't I modify... me?! 316 00:15:13,065 --> 00:15:15,800 You've been changing your DNA?! 317 00:15:15,835 --> 00:15:19,671 Well, at first, just a peptide here and there. 318 00:15:19,705 --> 00:15:23,141 Carrot for my presbyopia, Brahma bull for strength, 319 00:15:23,175 --> 00:15:26,044 and a touch of corn for highlights on my hair. 320 00:15:26,078 --> 00:15:28,480 So... how strong are you? 321 00:15:34,220 --> 00:15:35,954 Figurines. 322 00:15:35,988 --> 00:15:38,523 Get your porcelain figurines. 323 00:15:39,558 --> 00:15:41,860 Now, how about those Impressionists? 324 00:15:45,903 --> 00:15:48,856 I... but we sang Gershwin together! 325 00:15:48,990 --> 00:15:51,625 Well, rhapsody in boo-hoo. 326 00:15:51,659 --> 00:15:54,227 Do you know why we came to the museum today? 327 00:15:54,262 --> 00:15:57,898 Well, I thought it was because it was Tote Bag Day. 328 00:15:57,932 --> 00:16:02,636 Well, that was part of it, but the biggest part was that! 329 00:16:02,670 --> 00:16:05,572 Washington's backbone, Einstein's eyebrows. 330 00:16:05,606 --> 00:16:07,107 Florence Nightingale's tenacity, 331 00:16:07,141 --> 00:16:09,242 though I'll have to clip around her moral fiber. 332 00:16:09,277 --> 00:16:11,378 You're going to take DNA 333 00:16:11,412 --> 00:16:14,581 from these historical figures and add it to your own! 334 00:16:14,615 --> 00:16:16,950 I shall be the wisest and strongest maniac 335 00:16:16,984 --> 00:16:20,654 ever to bring the blessings of dictatorship to the world! 336 00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:23,990 Jig's up, Bob! 337 00:16:24,025 --> 00:16:26,593 Return the spear to the Homo erectus. 338 00:16:26,627 --> 00:16:28,495 Homo erectus? 339 00:16:28,529 --> 00:16:31,197 Where has that word been all my life? 340 00:16:31,232 --> 00:16:33,433 Now, Bart, I promised I wouldn't hurt you. 341 00:16:33,467 --> 00:16:34,834 You did that for me? 342 00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:36,836 More for Mom, but yes. 343 00:16:36,871 --> 00:16:38,972 But beware, I have DNA in me 344 00:16:39,006 --> 00:16:40,774 from Ophiocordyceps unilateralis, 345 00:16:40,808 --> 00:16:42,142 better known as... 346 00:16:42,176 --> 00:16:45,845 zombie ant fungus! 347 00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:50,283 And we're scared of that because...? 348 00:16:50,318 --> 00:16:52,519 What I am saying is, I could be tipped 349 00:16:52,553 --> 00:16:54,553 into a murderous rage by the slightest provocation. 350 00:16:54,555 --> 00:16:57,023 Could you take a picture of me with my family? 351 00:16:57,058 --> 00:16:58,558 Mm-hmm. 352 00:16:58,593 --> 00:17:01,795 Oh, would you take another for safety? 353 00:17:01,829 --> 00:17:03,964 Oh, I think my eyes were shut in that one. 354 00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:07,867 Now, can you take one with my husband's camera? 355 00:17:07,902 --> 00:17:09,669 They're all ugly because you're in them! 356 00:17:09,704 --> 00:17:11,304 Oh. 357 00:17:12,173 --> 00:17:15,976 Taste Praxiteles of Athens! 358 00:17:25,686 --> 00:17:28,188 Uh, Chief, we got a report of a disturbance at the Met. 359 00:17:28,222 --> 00:17:29,689 We got bigger problems, Lou. 360 00:17:29,724 --> 00:17:32,325 Horny teens who should be out having bad sex, 361 00:17:32,360 --> 00:17:36,196 but instead somebody made them take an abstinence pledge, 362 00:17:36,230 --> 00:17:37,497 by the looks of it. 363 00:17:39,433 --> 00:17:41,034 I don't get it. There are taboos 364 00:17:41,068 --> 00:17:42,669 about premarital sex in the Middle East, 365 00:17:42,703 --> 00:17:45,405 and you don't see those people getting all violent. 366 00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:50,810 You can't escape me! 367 00:17:50,845 --> 00:17:56,349 I've got grasshopper thighs and the sonar of a killer whale! 368 00:18:10,097 --> 00:18:16,302 Uh, Bob, you can't kill us without a little singing, right? 369 00:18:16,337 --> 00:18:17,637 A little singing? 370 00:18:17,672 --> 00:18:19,139 If there's one thing he did not have 371 00:18:19,173 --> 00:18:21,408 to genetically enhance, it's his voice. 372 00:18:21,442 --> 00:18:26,146 ♪ Non piu andrai, farfallone amoroso... ♪ 373 00:18:27,682 --> 00:18:31,418 How dare you torture my children with Mozart! 374 00:18:31,452 --> 00:18:33,420 Ah, you know Mozart? 375 00:18:33,454 --> 00:18:35,655 I call all music Mozart! 376 00:18:35,690 --> 00:18:38,792 We're here to stop you with the help of 377 00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:40,427 the teenage abstinence class! 378 00:18:40,461 --> 00:18:41,961 If you defeat this madman, 379 00:18:41,996 --> 00:18:43,763 I'll release you from your pledge 380 00:18:43,798 --> 00:18:46,766 and teach you other fun ways not to get pregnant. 381 00:18:46,801 --> 00:18:48,935 I think I might be pregnant already. 382 00:18:48,969 --> 00:18:50,470 Well, that's one of 'em. 383 00:18:57,545 --> 00:19:00,113 Python jaw... unhinge! 384 00:19:00,147 --> 00:19:01,548 Aah! 385 00:19:01,582 --> 00:19:03,883 I don't want to die in some old dude's mouth! 386 00:19:06,454 --> 00:19:08,354 Bob, would you look at yourself?! 387 00:19:09,824 --> 00:19:12,192 To quote Whitman, "This is what you shall do: 388 00:19:12,226 --> 00:19:14,227 "love the earth and sun and animals, 389 00:19:14,261 --> 00:19:17,530 despise riches, stand up for the stupid and crazy..." 390 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:21,334 Who am I kidding? 391 00:19:21,368 --> 00:19:23,470 My only exit... is a final one. 392 00:19:23,504 --> 00:19:24,871 What?! No! 393 00:19:24,905 --> 00:19:26,372 Farewell, Simpsons. 394 00:19:26,407 --> 00:19:28,608 And, Lisa, when you're older, 395 00:19:28,642 --> 00:19:31,811 write an autobiographical novel trashing the rest of them. 396 00:19:31,846 --> 00:19:33,146 How veiled? 397 00:19:33,180 --> 00:19:35,715 Thinly! 398 00:19:45,192 --> 00:19:46,392 Now, don't worry. 399 00:19:46,427 --> 00:19:50,330 Your friend will always be part of our drinking water. 400 00:19:58,038 --> 00:20:01,374 Oh, right, I gave myself gills. 401 00:20:15,232 --> 00:20:18,368 I told you, the only dancing I like is square. 402 00:20:18,402 --> 00:20:21,838 Hey, I let you pay for those boys' skipping lessons. 403 00:20:21,872 --> 00:20:23,306 Okay. 404 00:20:33,684 --> 00:20:37,020 Ooh! Ned! Ha! 405 00:20:39,790 --> 00:20:42,025 Sure do miss that laugh. 406 00:20:42,059 --> 00:20:45,061 Ha, ha! I miss her, too. 407 00:20:45,096 --> 00:20:50,096 == sync, corrected by elderman == @elder_man 408 00:21:32,463 --> 00:21:33,976 Shh!