1
00:00:00,622 --> 00:00:02,099
Okay, Emma, next question:

2
00:00:02,100 --> 00:00:04,189
I need two words to describe your daddy.

3
00:00:04,190 --> 00:00:06,468
- Ha.
- Fun.

4
00:00:06,469 --> 00:00:08,770
Well, you wouldn't be
here if I wasn't, right?

5
00:00:09,548 --> 00:00:12,531
Ben, I can't believe you signed
up for match-making night.

6
00:00:12,997 --> 00:00:15,313
Someone having trouble meeting girls?

7
00:00:15,947 --> 00:00:17,136
No.

8
00:00:17,137 --> 00:00:20,598
But if a computer's gonna help me
custom-build one, I say why not?

9
00:00:20,599 --> 00:00:23,521
It's a girl, not a burger.

10
00:00:24,994 --> 00:00:27,076
One of my clients actually met her husband

11
00:00:27,077 --> 00:00:28,780
through one of these
match-making thingies...

12
00:00:28,781 --> 00:00:31,284
- See? It does work.
- ...And then she tried to kill him.

13
00:00:33,123 --> 00:00:35,820
I believe the word you're
glossing over is "tried."

14
00:00:38,374 --> 00:00:41,607
No no no. Ben, you do not want
to meet Gretchen Schilling.

15
00:00:41,608 --> 00:00:43,858
Truly the scariest client I've ever had.

16
00:00:43,859 --> 00:00:46,570
Wait wait wait, Gretchen Schilling?

17
00:00:46,571 --> 00:00:48,596
Didn't you try to set me up with her?

18
00:00:50,267 --> 00:00:54,227
Yes, but that was before I
was 100% sure she was guilty.

19
00:00:55,182 --> 00:00:57,162
Which is why I'm asking a computer

20
00:00:57,163 --> 00:00:58,823
to set me up instead of you.

21
00:00:58,824 --> 00:01:01,184
In a few hours I'll be
standing face-to-face

22
00:01:01,185 --> 00:01:02,743
with my dream girl.

23
00:01:03,325 --> 00:01:06,242
13. 13 here.

24
00:01:06,243 --> 00:01:08,149
Any takers?

25
00:01:09,027 --> 00:01:10,823
13?

26
00:01:10,824 --> 00:01:13,041
<i>Is somebody looking for 13?</i>

27
00:01:14,980 --> 00:01:16,534
Mom?

28
00:01:20,453 --> 00:01:30,401
Synced and corrected by Nantinha
~ www.addic7ed.com ~

29
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:32,498
How could this happen?

30
00:01:32,499 --> 00:01:35,428
How could someone so awesome
end up with someone so...

31
00:01:35,937 --> 00:01:38,033
- Equally awesome?
- Uh-huh.

32
00:01:38,908 --> 00:01:41,531
Don't think I'm excited to
find out I can't do better

33
00:01:41,532 --> 00:01:44,181
than a bartender whose
mother still cleans his room.

34
00:01:44,710 --> 00:01:46,624
I wore my lucky bra for this.

35
00:01:47,716 --> 00:01:49,631
If everyone else's matches were this awful,

36
00:01:49,632 --> 00:01:51,974
there's gotta be a bunch
of lonely lookers out there.

37
00:01:52,801 --> 00:01:56,065
Oh! There's a girl I
could bring home to mom.

38
00:01:56,066 --> 00:02:00,198
Oh, Benji, so young, so innocent,

39
00:02:00,199 --> 00:02:02,965
I can smell her marital boredom from here.

40
00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:04,955
Plus her husband hit on me

41
00:02:04,956 --> 00:02:06,548
at the dry-cleaner's last week...

42
00:02:07,362 --> 00:02:09,572
Which may explain why she's here.

43
00:02:10,610 --> 00:02:13,521
- What about that one?
- Oh God no.

44
00:02:13,522 --> 00:02:15,689
<i>The boobs, the hair, the nose... all fake.</i>

45
00:02:15,690 --> 00:02:17,722
The maintenance alone would break you.

46
00:02:18,700 --> 00:02:20,545
Wow. I didn't know you
were so good at this.

47
00:02:20,546 --> 00:02:23,349
Oh, Ben, the things you don't know about me

48
00:02:23,350 --> 00:02:25,387
could fill an adult bookstore.

49
00:02:26,482 --> 00:02:27,989
I can't believe I'm gonna ask you this,

50
00:02:27,990 --> 00:02:31,328
but... will you be my wingmom?

51
00:02:31,875 --> 00:02:34,926
Wait. For the first time in history,

52
00:02:34,927 --> 00:02:38,146
a son actually wants his mother's
opinion on who to go out with?

53
00:02:38,147 --> 00:02:39,644
Yeah, I do.

54
00:02:40,133 --> 00:02:42,222
I think I'm gonna cry.

55
00:02:43,800 --> 00:02:48,617
Almost there. Wait for it.

56
00:02:48,618 --> 00:02:51,652
- Ta-da!
- That is so cool!

57
00:02:51,653 --> 00:02:53,753
The laundromat re-opened.

58
00:02:54,383 --> 00:02:55,708
So that means they never found out

59
00:02:55,709 --> 00:02:57,818
who was responsible for the drier fire.

60
00:02:58,701 --> 00:03:01,592
- Right?
- No no, not the laundromat...

61
00:03:01,593 --> 00:03:05,086
- the car! Adele the chevelle...
- Oh my God.

62
00:03:05,087 --> 00:03:06,797
The only woman my dad truly loved.

63
00:03:06,798 --> 00:03:09,435
Wait, I thought your mom made
him sell that car in the divorce.

64
00:03:09,436 --> 00:03:11,532
Well, yeah, he said he'd do a
lot of things that he didn't,

65
00:03:11,533 --> 00:03:14,633
like stay married to
her and not hit on guys.

66
00:03:15,463 --> 00:03:18,054
Which reminds me... do
not tell my mom about this.

67
00:03:18,055 --> 00:03:20,558
Wait. So what are you gonna do with it?

68
00:03:20,559 --> 00:03:23,157
And by "you," I mean "we."

69
00:03:23,158 --> 00:03:25,932
Well, he's finally coming to pick
it up out of storage in a week,

70
00:03:25,933 --> 00:03:28,084
so I said I'd make sure she's ready.

71
00:03:28,085 --> 00:03:30,606
And how could I do that
without a little test drive?

72
00:03:30,607 --> 00:03:32,730
Which will probably last a week.

73
00:03:32,731 --> 00:03:35,331
And I know where we are going first...

74
00:03:35,332 --> 00:03:36,786
the beach.

75
00:03:36,787 --> 00:03:40,183
We're gonna take this hot
rod to meet some hot bods.

76
00:03:40,895 --> 00:03:43,359
Yeah, but the beach is only the first stop.

77
00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:46,284
I've been waiting to drive
this car my entire life.

78
00:03:46,648 --> 00:03:49,736
My life just flashed before my eyes.

79
00:03:50,710 --> 00:03:52,373
This is never happening again.

80
00:03:52,374 --> 00:03:54,298
We only went around the block.

81
00:03:54,299 --> 00:03:56,404
But that block was like a war zone,

82
00:03:56,405 --> 00:03:59,669
with 200 giant yellow
tanks all aiming for Adele.

83
00:04:00,219 --> 00:04:01,819
I believe they're called taxis.

84
00:04:01,820 --> 00:04:04,006
Yeah. Bro, you were going so slow,

85
00:04:04,007 --> 00:04:06,275
I bought a hot dog from the back seat.

86
00:04:06,853 --> 00:04:09,736
Just one mark on this car
and my dad will disown me.

87
00:04:09,737 --> 00:04:11,464
You know what? I totally get it,

88
00:04:11,465 --> 00:04:14,316
and I don't want you to do anything
you're not comfortable with.

89
00:04:14,317 --> 00:04:16,901
So why don't you take Emma upstairs

90
00:04:16,902 --> 00:04:18,947
and we will make sure
everything is spotless?

91
00:04:18,948 --> 00:04:20,863
- Thanks, tuck.
- Yeah.

92
00:04:24,985 --> 00:04:28,081
- Don't forget the keys.
- Oh, I won't.

93
00:04:29,944 --> 00:04:31,357
Whoo. Okay.

94
00:04:32,917 --> 00:04:34,443
Whoa. Hey, what are you doing?

95
00:04:34,444 --> 00:04:36,204
I'm going to the beach.

96
00:04:36,577 --> 00:04:39,419
I have to. I already updated my status.

97
00:04:40,132 --> 00:04:43,283
Hey, I know that you boys
have no morals or integrity,

98
00:04:43,284 --> 00:04:45,390
but I will not lie to Danny like that.

99
00:04:45,391 --> 00:04:47,599
All right? He's my best
friend and we have a code.

100
00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:49,441
I'll let you drive on the way back.

101
00:04:49,442 --> 00:04:51,021
- Code broken. I'm in.
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.

102
00:04:51,339 --> 00:04:53,170
<i>Whoo!</i>

103
00:04:53,799 --> 00:04:56,516
I call this one "the Ben,"
because it's strong, smooth

104
00:04:56,517 --> 00:04:58,034
and might just get you in trouble.

105
00:04:59,257 --> 00:05:01,713
Okay, thanks for playing.

106
00:05:01,714 --> 00:05:05,215
We'll see you next time on
"who wants to date my son?"

107
00:05:05,216 --> 00:05:07,756
- Okay, bye-bye.
- Mom, what are you doing?

108
00:05:07,757 --> 00:05:09,427
You're the one who told me to
talk to her in the first place.

109
00:05:09,428 --> 00:05:11,390
Yeah, for practice...

110
00:05:11,391 --> 00:05:12,990
Until I found you a good one,

111
00:05:12,991 --> 00:05:15,810
which I just did... In the men's room.

112
00:05:16,747 --> 00:05:18,531
- And that's why you're my wingmom.
- Yeah.

113
00:05:18,532 --> 00:05:20,871
I never would've thought to look
for a girl in the men's room.

114
00:05:20,872 --> 00:05:22,668
Uh-huh. Yeah, well, she's
gonna be out here any minute,

115
00:05:22,669 --> 00:05:25,135
so stand up straight, fix your collar

116
00:05:25,136 --> 00:05:26,616
and whatever you do...

117
00:05:26,617 --> 00:05:28,271
Don't be yourself.

118
00:05:34,128 --> 00:05:38,211
- Yeah, all clear.
- Maybe if we don't say anything, he won't notice.

119
00:05:38,212 --> 00:05:40,896
Really? Yeah, I think he's gonna notice

120
00:05:40,897 --> 00:05:42,615
that he's missing this.

121
00:05:44,131 --> 00:05:46,449
But I mean, you never know.
Maybe the giant scratch

122
00:05:46,450 --> 00:05:48,510
on the side of the door will distract him.

123
00:05:49,296 --> 00:05:51,991
You know, I can't believe
I let you talk me into this.

124
00:05:51,992 --> 00:05:54,629
Oh, you are not pinning this
on me. You were the one driving.

125
00:05:54,630 --> 00:05:56,539
Oh, but you were the one screaming at me.

126
00:05:56,540 --> 00:05:59,496
Yeah, I was screaming,
"watch out for that mailbox!"

127
00:06:02,604 --> 00:06:05,408
You know what? Turning on each
other is not gonna fix anything.

128
00:06:05,409 --> 00:06:07,604
So here's what we're gonna
I'll call the body shop

129
00:06:07,605 --> 00:06:09,613
and you make sure that Danny does not...

130
00:06:09,614 --> 00:06:12,569
- Hey.
- Oh, hey, guys. Where've you been?

131
00:06:12,570 --> 00:06:13,979
- Shopping.
- Coffee.

132
00:06:14,495 --> 00:06:16,614
- Shopping...
- For coffee.

133
00:06:18,444 --> 00:06:20,338
- We didn't find any.
- No.

134
00:06:20,927 --> 00:06:23,775
- But Riley was just walking me home.
- Yeah.

135
00:06:23,776 --> 00:06:27,099
- So there you go. Bye.
- Bye.

136
00:06:33,481 --> 00:06:35,868
Well, I was just going to
go say good night to Adele.

137
00:06:35,869 --> 00:06:37,337
Now? No, she's fine.

138
00:06:37,338 --> 00:06:38,373
Yeah, we were just down there.

139
00:06:38,374 --> 00:06:39,834
She's all tucked in for the night.

140
00:06:40,883 --> 00:06:43,077
Oh, look, Ben's here. Hey,
Ben. Let's talk to Ben.

141
00:06:43,078 --> 00:06:45,406
Tell us something, anything.
Please, I beg of you.

142
00:06:46,686 --> 00:06:47,580
You know, you're not gonna believe it,

143
00:06:47,581 --> 00:06:49,288
but I think mom has found
me the perfect woman.

144
00:06:49,714 --> 00:06:51,997
Oh, last week she found
me the perfect shirt.

145
00:06:51,998 --> 00:06:53,391
Man, she's on a roll.

146
00:06:54,157 --> 00:06:55,970
Just...

147
00:06:55,971 --> 00:06:58,277
I'm telling you, man,
that woman is amazing.

148
00:06:58,278 --> 00:07:02,079
Oh God! How hot is it in that elevator?

149
00:07:03,017 --> 00:07:05,422
Whew! It's more like a hell-evator.

150
00:07:06,456 --> 00:07:08,172
Though that shouldn't
affect you, Tuck Tuck,

151
00:07:08,173 --> 00:07:10,422
since heat tends to rise. Bwa-dup!

152
00:07:13,936 --> 00:07:16,883
So, Benji, how did it go with Bailey?

153
00:07:16,884 --> 00:07:19,092
I mean, was I right or was I right?

154
00:07:19,093 --> 00:07:21,307
You were so right. We already had lunch

155
00:07:21,308 --> 00:07:23,089
- she's on her way over here for dinner.
- Yes.

156
00:07:23,090 --> 00:07:26,320
And if all goes well, I'll
be serving her breakfast.

157
00:07:26,321 --> 00:07:29,852
Oh yeah, that's my boy!
Yeah! Yeah, you know what?

158
00:07:29,853 --> 00:07:31,231
I probably shouldn't be
doing that with my son.

159
00:07:31,232 --> 00:07:32,615
That's weird. Okay.

160
00:07:33,836 --> 00:07:37,432
It's funny, but I already feel like
I've known Bailey my whole life.

161
00:07:37,433 --> 00:07:40,220
Knock knock! Whoo!

162
00:07:40,221 --> 00:07:43,001
That elevator is quite the slow cooker.

163
00:07:44,295 --> 00:07:46,268
You should call that thing an oven-ator.

164
00:07:48,154 --> 00:07:50,526
Well, aren't you adorable?

165
00:07:50,527 --> 00:07:52,506
I guess this apartment doesn't
have a height restriction.

166
00:07:52,507 --> 00:07:54,812
Boop boop boop.

167
00:07:57,024 --> 00:07:58,723
Yo. Yo, isn't she hilarious?

168
00:07:58,724 --> 00:08:02,230
I don't know. It's hard
to hear from down here.

169
00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:08,228
Bailey, this is Tucker, this is my
brother Danny and you know my mom.

170
00:08:08,229 --> 00:08:10,853
- Bons.
- Bails.

171
00:08:11,601 --> 00:08:13,467
So can I get you a glass of wine?

172
00:08:13,468 --> 00:08:15,172
Just one? What is this, church?

173
00:08:15,173 --> 00:08:16,563
Oh!

174
00:08:18,824 --> 00:08:21,078
So what do you think? Isn't she great?

175
00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:26,421
Oh my God. I know, right?

176
00:08:28,170 --> 00:08:29,956
I think you're dating mom.

177
00:08:32,302 --> 00:08:34,383
Don't you just love her?

178
00:08:34,384 --> 00:08:35,845
Jinx!

179
00:08:37,277 --> 00:08:38,967
I don't see it. I don't.

180
00:08:44,099 --> 00:08:47,162
I gotta say, I like a girl
who brings her own toothbrush.

181
00:08:47,922 --> 00:08:50,144
Not my first bedroom rodeo, Benji.

182
00:08:51,259 --> 00:08:54,781
Benji? Is there any way
you can not call me that?

183
00:08:54,782 --> 00:08:56,599
That's kind of what my mom calls me.

184
00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:58,835
Oh my God, how much do I love her?

185
00:08:58,836 --> 00:09:01,328
It turns out we have the same
hair girl, the same pilates girl

186
00:09:01,329 --> 00:09:04,777
and the same nail girl.
Her girls are my girls.

187
00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:06,437
It's like we're the same girl.

188
00:09:07,497 --> 00:09:10,569
Yeah, if we could possibly
stop talking about my mom,

189
00:09:10,570 --> 00:09:12,362
that would be super helpful.

190
00:09:12,961 --> 00:09:14,849
You know what else might be helpful?

191
00:09:15,370 --> 00:09:18,689
If I slip out of something comfortable.

192
00:09:18,690 --> 00:09:21,409
Bingo. Yeah, that would do it.

193
00:09:21,410 --> 00:09:23,779
- Should I dim the lights?
- Don't bother.

194
00:09:23,780 --> 00:09:25,886
I wore my lucky bra for this.

195
00:09:26,966 --> 00:09:28,626
What you say?

196
00:09:29,697 --> 00:09:32,062
I said come to mama.

197
00:09:32,643 --> 00:09:35,072
Are you all right?

198
00:09:36,104 --> 00:09:38,155
I don't think I'm ever gonna be all right.

199
00:09:39,081 --> 00:09:40,513
We need to break up.

200
00:09:44,206 --> 00:09:45,338
Okay, I talked to the body shop

201
00:09:45,339 --> 00:09:46,792
and they said we could have
it back by the end of the day.

202
00:09:46,793 --> 00:09:49,956
- Where are the keys?
- I hid them where Danny would never look.

203
00:09:53,363 --> 00:09:55,747
I mean, that dude ain't done
a dish since he moved in.

204
00:09:55,748 --> 00:09:57,189
You know what I'm saying?

205
00:09:58,863 --> 00:10:00,395
Great, come on, let's
get out of here. Awesome.

206
00:10:00,876 --> 00:10:02,332
Oh!

207
00:10:04,623 --> 00:10:06,622
Perfect, you found my keys.

208
00:10:06,623 --> 00:10:09,352
You know what? I've been
thinking. I'm being an idiot.

209
00:10:09,353 --> 00:10:12,708
Millions of people drive in this city
every day without getting in an accident.

210
00:10:12,709 --> 00:10:16,245
Probably not as many as you think.

211
00:10:17,611 --> 00:10:19,364
- No, not.
- Well, Adele and I are going to the beach

212
00:10:19,365 --> 00:10:21,247
with or without you two. It's your call.

213
00:10:21,692 --> 00:10:23,078
Yeah.

214
00:10:25,305 --> 00:10:27,618
Oh well, the beach sounds great,

215
00:10:27,619 --> 00:10:28,963
so we'll meet you by the car.

216
00:10:28,964 --> 00:10:30,693
Yeah, hey, thanks for grabbing everything.

217
00:10:33,961 --> 00:10:36,659
What do you mean you're
not gonna see her anymore?

218
00:10:36,660 --> 00:10:39,129
- Don't you find her attractive?
- Yeah, I do,

219
00:10:39,521 --> 00:10:41,641
which has it's own set of issues.

220
00:10:41,642 --> 00:10:44,331
Honey, she is the best thing
that ever happened to you.

221
00:10:44,332 --> 00:10:47,167
Look, mom, I'm sorry, but I've
already told her flat out it's over.

222
00:10:47,168 --> 00:10:48,792
Bailey and I are done.

223
00:10:49,103 --> 00:10:50,379
Hey, guys.

224
00:10:50,690 --> 00:10:53,693
Baby, you look so cute
in your little uniform.

225
00:10:54,128 --> 00:10:57,749
- What are you doing here?
- Just visiting my man at work.

226
00:10:57,750 --> 00:10:59,274
Oh.

227
00:10:59,275 --> 00:11:00,740
Well, I hope you mean this guy,

228
00:11:00,741 --> 00:11:03,429
because if I recall, we decided
to stop seeing each other.

229
00:11:03,430 --> 00:11:05,209
No, as I recall,

230
00:11:05,210 --> 00:11:07,684
you decided and now I'm undeciding for you.

231
00:11:07,685 --> 00:11:09,741
Did you miss the part
where I said we were done?

232
00:11:09,742 --> 00:11:11,365
Followed by the text
that said we were done,

233
00:11:11,366 --> 00:11:12,734
followed by the phone call and email

234
00:11:12,735 --> 00:11:14,563
that I believe were similarly themed?

235
00:11:14,564 --> 00:11:16,098
Ben, you might not know this,

236
00:11:16,099 --> 00:11:18,371
but I'm the best thing
that ever happened to you.

237
00:11:18,372 --> 00:11:20,569
But we can talk about it more
when you get home from work.

238
00:11:20,570 --> 00:11:23,178
Home? We don't have a home.

239
00:11:23,179 --> 00:11:25,731
Sure we do. I was just there
cleaning out some drawers.

240
00:11:28,128 --> 00:11:29,950
Wait, how'd you get in my apartment?

241
00:11:29,951 --> 00:11:31,553
Oh, I made a copy of your keys.

242
00:11:32,317 --> 00:11:34,184
You made a copy of my keys?

243
00:11:34,185 --> 00:11:36,238
Yeah. Oh, and...

244
00:11:37,527 --> 00:11:39,978
Here's your mail. See
you later, Benji-boo.

245
00:11:41,207 --> 00:11:42,455
How do you feel about chicken for dinner?

246
00:11:42,456 --> 00:11:45,011
Oh! Never mind, I'll surprise you.

247
00:11:46,558 --> 00:11:49,986
Oh! Come by any time,
Bons. We'd love to have you.

248
00:11:54,289 --> 00:11:58,011
Well, I think somebody owes
their mother an apology.

249
00:11:58,693 --> 00:12:00,267
She is nothing like me.

250
00:12:00,268 --> 00:12:01,911
She is nuts!

251
00:12:02,929 --> 00:12:04,379
I've gotta get those keys back.

252
00:12:04,380 --> 00:12:05,982
Oh yeah, you've gotta get those keys back.

253
00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:11,038
There, super glue and duct tape.

254
00:12:11,677 --> 00:12:13,292
This is never gonna work.

255
00:12:13,293 --> 00:12:15,091
It just needs to get us to the beach.

256
00:12:15,092 --> 00:12:16,680
And then once we're
there, we'll be all like,

257
00:12:16,681 --> 00:12:18,743
"oh my God, Danny,
somebody sideswiped the car

258
00:12:18,744 --> 00:12:21,170
and then tried to super glue
and duct tape it back together."

259
00:12:22,343 --> 00:12:24,161
- Here he comes.
- Hey.

260
00:12:24,162 --> 00:12:26,694
Hey, guys, ready to go? Oh my God!

261
00:12:27,592 --> 00:12:28,935
I think I forgot the chips.

262
00:12:29,892 --> 00:12:31,483
All right, that's okay. Who needs 'em?

263
00:12:31,484 --> 00:12:32,629
All right, hop hop, chop chop,

264
00:12:32,630 --> 00:12:34,333
'cause you don't want your mom walking by

265
00:12:34,334 --> 00:12:36,055
and catching you in a great big lie.

266
00:12:36,056 --> 00:12:37,724
- Nope.
- Thanks, guys.

267
00:12:37,725 --> 00:12:40,770
- Thank you.
- Great.

268
00:12:40,771 --> 00:12:42,745
Oh my God, I think we're pulling it off.

269
00:12:42,746 --> 00:12:44,263
Don't jinx it, don't jinx it.

270
00:12:46,793 --> 00:12:50,161
<i>Right, here we go.</i>

271
00:12:51,837 --> 00:12:53,182
- Cool.
- Bailey!

272
00:12:53,183 --> 00:12:54,412
- Let's go.
- Ready to go?

273
00:12:57,965 --> 00:12:59,424
- Hey, what happened to the...
- Oh! Look out!

274
00:13:00,421 --> 00:13:02,379
Bailey, are you okay?

275
00:13:02,380 --> 00:13:04,379
Oh my God.

276
00:13:05,633 --> 00:13:08,255
Is this your father's car?!

277
00:13:13,823 --> 00:13:17,375
Okay, you just let us know if
you need anything, Bailey-bee.

278
00:13:17,376 --> 00:13:21,771
Pillow, tea, perhaps a
bus ticket to crazy town?

279
00:13:22,539 --> 00:13:23,655
Well?

280
00:13:24,728 --> 00:13:26,612
Well, it's just a bruised wrist,

281
00:13:26,613 --> 00:13:28,725
so unfortunately she's gonna make it.

282
00:13:30,545 --> 00:13:33,151
Yo, is it wrong to hit someone with a car

283
00:13:33,152 --> 00:13:35,169
and a restraining order on the same day?

284
00:13:36,273 --> 00:13:38,363
If only it were that simple.

285
00:13:38,364 --> 00:13:40,094
It seems if you break up with her,

286
00:13:40,095 --> 00:13:42,676
she's gonna sue Danny
for everything he's worth,

287
00:13:42,677 --> 00:13:45,354
which I'd be fine with if I
didn't get 15% off the top.

288
00:13:47,111 --> 00:13:48,630
Mom, you have to fix this.

289
00:13:48,631 --> 00:13:50,868
You're the one that brought
itsy-bitsy Bonnie into our lives.

290
00:13:51,807 --> 00:13:53,449
Oh! And... yeah, well, you're the one

291
00:13:53,450 --> 00:13:55,910
who mowed her down with dad's mistress,

292
00:13:55,911 --> 00:13:58,561
that two-door whore Adrienne.

293
00:13:58,562 --> 00:14:00,587
You know her name is Adele, mom.

294
00:14:00,588 --> 00:14:02,753
I don't care what her name is!

295
00:14:02,754 --> 00:14:03,881
I need all of us to focus!

296
00:14:03,882 --> 00:14:05,001
It's not really the problem right now!

297
00:14:06,007 --> 00:14:08,599
Since you seem to have one or
two things in common with Bailey,

298
00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:10,145
what would get rid of you?

299
00:14:12,382 --> 00:14:15,476
Well, probably a single
dad who works for tips

300
00:14:15,477 --> 00:14:17,747
and lives with a giant and a dwarf!

301
00:14:20,328 --> 00:14:23,160
But since that hasn't worked, I don't know!

302
00:14:23,891 --> 00:14:27,189
Great. So she's the mother
of the mother of all crazies.

303
00:14:28,953 --> 00:14:30,177
That's it.

304
00:14:30,487 --> 00:14:33,792
You just have to out-crazy the crazy.

305
00:14:35,460 --> 00:14:38,196
- I think I know how to fix this.
- You do?

306
00:14:38,197 --> 00:14:41,238
Oh yeah, that Ray Wheeler is gonna rue

307
00:14:41,239 --> 00:14:44,402
the day he tried to hide
Annabelle and double-cross me!

308
00:14:44,403 --> 00:14:47,223
- Mom, you know it's "Adele"!
- I don't care what her name is!

309
00:14:47,224 --> 00:14:48,397
Okay, mom!

310
00:14:49,241 --> 00:14:52,086
Again, kinda missing the real issue here.

311
00:14:52,087 --> 00:14:54,439
No, I'm not. It's parked right downstairs.

312
00:14:57,026 --> 00:14:58,496
Well, I think mom's out.

313
00:14:59,527 --> 00:15:03,110
Now what are we supposed to do?

314
00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:04,516
It's Riley's phone.

315
00:15:05,432 --> 00:15:07,005
Pete's auto body?

316
00:15:08,085 --> 00:15:11,421
Riley, that girl's body
bouncing off the windshield

317
00:15:11,422 --> 00:15:13,547
is the best thing that's
every happened to us.

318
00:15:14,465 --> 00:15:16,081
You know, just play it cool

319
00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:17,878
and he'll blame all the damage on her.

320
00:15:18,987 --> 00:15:22,400
Great. You're right. I can do this.

321
00:15:22,401 --> 00:15:24,509
"Scratch? What scratch?"

322
00:15:28,103 --> 00:15:29,328
That was the repair guy.

323
00:15:29,329 --> 00:15:31,068
Scratch? What scratch?

324
00:15:32,405 --> 00:15:34,672
The scratch he got when he hit Bailey,

325
00:15:34,978 --> 00:15:37,044
and the scratch that your good friend Riley

326
00:15:37,349 --> 00:15:39,560
already called to have
taken care of for you.

327
00:15:39,561 --> 00:15:43,271
Oh yeah, that's me, just
always thinking ahead.

328
00:15:44,570 --> 00:15:46,161
So far ahead, you actually called

329
00:15:46,162 --> 00:15:48,543
a whole day before the accident?

330
00:15:49,557 --> 00:15:50,819
I got nothing.

331
00:15:52,328 --> 00:15:54,871
I'm so sorry. I don't know what happened.

332
00:15:55,276 --> 00:15:57,433
Okay, that mailbox just
jumped out of nowhere.

333
00:15:58,741 --> 00:16:01,041
I'm sorry, I just... I
don't know, I panicked.

334
00:16:01,042 --> 00:16:03,012
I mean, a mailbox is federal property.

335
00:16:03,013 --> 00:16:06,080
I could go to jail. I could
end up like Gretchen Schilling,

336
00:16:06,081 --> 00:16:08,480
behind bars with a stainless steel toilet

337
00:16:08,481 --> 00:16:10,933
and... and no hair product.

338
00:16:11,536 --> 00:16:13,257
I wouldn't make it.

339
00:16:13,258 --> 00:16:16,088
I mean, those girls are
even crazier than that one.

340
00:16:18,783 --> 00:16:21,043
Oh my God, that's exactly what we need.

341
00:16:21,044 --> 00:16:23,937
- Oh my God, Ben, listen...
- No no no no, it's like what mom said,

342
00:16:23,938 --> 00:16:25,877
we need to out-crazy the crazy.

343
00:16:25,878 --> 00:16:27,615
- Where's Gretchen these days?
- No. No no no.

344
00:16:27,616 --> 00:16:29,958
Ben, I am not calling
the scariest person I know

345
00:16:29,959 --> 00:16:32,059
to come threaten your new roommate.

346
00:16:32,060 --> 00:16:34,926
Oh, so you would rather
let your best friend

347
00:16:34,927 --> 00:16:37,257
get dragged into court
for something both myself

348
00:16:37,258 --> 00:16:39,279
and the postmaster general

349
00:16:39,280 --> 00:16:41,687
would agree is actually your fault?!

350
00:16:47,556 --> 00:16:49,133
Well, now that I think about it,

351
00:16:49,582 --> 00:16:50,967
her number is still in my phone.

352
00:16:58,019 --> 00:16:59,659
Oh, I wonder who that could be.

353
00:16:59,660 --> 00:17:01,826
Are you gentlemen expecting anyone?

354
00:17:03,353 --> 00:17:04,978
I know I am not.

355
00:17:08,087 --> 00:17:09,672
Nor am I.

356
00:17:14,132 --> 00:17:16,274
Riley, what are you doing
here? Where's Gretchen?

357
00:17:16,275 --> 00:17:18,838
Turns out the number I had
was from a stolen phone.

358
00:17:19,952 --> 00:17:22,055
But don't worry. I got this.

359
00:17:22,877 --> 00:17:25,715
Shut up, Wheeler, and let me see my baby.

360
00:17:25,716 --> 00:17:27,066
Mama's home!

361
00:17:27,573 --> 00:17:30,341
Yo, who's the wigstand?

362
00:17:31,956 --> 00:17:34,024
Who's this?

363
00:17:34,025 --> 00:17:35,992
That's Gretchen, Emma's mom.

364
00:17:35,993 --> 00:17:38,662
Yeah. Yeah, she's been away
for like the last six months.

365
00:17:39,196 --> 00:17:42,737
Supposed to be nine but,
you know, good behavior.

366
00:17:45,687 --> 00:17:48,601
And how about you get your feet

367
00:17:48,602 --> 00:17:50,239
off my coffee table?

368
00:17:53,589 --> 00:17:56,300
I didn't steal it for you to ruin.

369
00:17:58,587 --> 00:18:01,357
And this is Bailey. She's a... a friend.

370
00:18:01,358 --> 00:18:03,573
Oh, I am a lot more than a friend.

371
00:18:03,574 --> 00:18:06,238
Well, you're not anymore,
'cause now that I'm out,

372
00:18:06,239 --> 00:18:08,429
I am back with my man.

373
00:18:08,430 --> 00:18:09,866
And I'm warning you...

374
00:18:09,867 --> 00:18:11,501
don't get in my way.

375
00:18:16,385 --> 00:18:18,591
- Was that a threat?
- Yes.

376
00:18:18,956 --> 00:18:20,600
Yeah, I believe it was.

377
00:18:20,601 --> 00:18:24,435
One... that I would take very seriously.

378
00:18:25,376 --> 00:18:27,036
And if I ever...

379
00:18:27,037 --> 00:18:28,416
See you round here again,

380
00:18:28,417 --> 00:18:30,684
well, I'm gonna do some bad things,

381
00:18:30,685 --> 00:18:33,828
some very bad things.

382
00:18:34,632 --> 00:18:38,052
Oh yeah? Like what?

383
00:18:38,504 --> 00:18:41,195
Things... that are bad.

384
00:18:42,394 --> 00:18:44,079
Okay, I fixed everything.

385
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:47,010
Mom, look out. It's
Ben's baby mama, Gretchen,

386
00:18:47,011 --> 00:18:49,446
- and she's back from prison.
- Yeah. Yeah, watch out,

387
00:18:50,036 --> 00:18:51,750
or she will cut you.

388
00:18:54,165 --> 00:18:56,479
With what, her sharp wit?

389
00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:58,404
Yeah, I think I'm good.

390
00:18:59,182 --> 00:19:01,935
And you, listen up, you little sea monkey.

391
00:19:01,936 --> 00:19:03,497
No, you all listen.

392
00:19:04,576 --> 00:19:06,338
Look, Ben, I know what you're doing.

393
00:19:06,339 --> 00:19:09,056
You could've just broken up
with me like a normal person.

394
00:19:09,057 --> 00:19:10,338
Actually, I couldn't.

395
00:19:10,339 --> 00:19:12,590
I tried, like, a gabillion times.

396
00:19:12,591 --> 00:19:14,116
Well, I can take a hint.

397
00:19:14,117 --> 00:19:15,850
Again, I tried.

398
00:19:16,170 --> 00:19:18,592
But don't think I'm leaving quietly.

399
00:19:18,593 --> 00:19:21,292
I am going to sue you so hard

400
00:19:21,293 --> 00:19:22,957
you're all gonna feel it!

401
00:19:25,255 --> 00:19:26,354
And to think...

402
00:19:26,704 --> 00:19:29,390
I was gonna make you marry me!

403
00:19:33,592 --> 00:19:37,252
God. You gotta love her spunk, huh?

404
00:19:37,722 --> 00:19:39,492
Mom, you ruined everything!

405
00:19:39,493 --> 00:19:41,248
Riley was about to scare her off!

406
00:19:41,249 --> 00:19:44,796
Really? 'Cause I didn't
think it was going that well.

407
00:19:46,317 --> 00:19:47,659
Are you kidding me?

408
00:19:47,660 --> 00:19:49,504
Girl, I thought you nailed it.

409
00:19:50,805 --> 00:19:53,793
Right, because Riley is so scary!

410
00:19:53,794 --> 00:19:55,338
Oh, come on! You can't
jump all over it like...

411
00:19:55,339 --> 00:19:59,215
- oh, is this about Adele?!
- For the love of God, focus! Huh?!

412
00:20:00,894 --> 00:20:04,278
- What are we gonna do?!
- Okay, just calm down.

413
00:20:04,279 --> 00:20:07,208
I said I was gonna fix it, and I did.

414
00:20:07,715 --> 00:20:09,269
If there's no car,

415
00:20:09,866 --> 00:20:11,662
there's no crime.

416
00:20:13,549 --> 00:20:16,773
Wait, what do you mean,
"if there's no car"?

417
00:20:19,250 --> 00:20:21,922
It's more of a coffee table now.

418
00:20:21,923 --> 00:20:24,789
Damn. My sunglasses were in there.

419
00:20:25,555 --> 00:20:27,388
What am I supposed to tell dad now?

420
00:20:27,389 --> 00:20:29,397
I'm almost positive he's gonna notice this.

421
00:20:29,398 --> 00:20:31,783
Oh, he definitely will.

422
00:20:31,784 --> 00:20:34,226
Here, quick, take a picture. Okay.

423
00:20:35,094 --> 00:20:37,061
Ah!

424
00:20:37,062 --> 00:20:38,990
All right, take a bunch.
I want to make a calendar.

425
00:20:40,644 --> 00:20:42,036
Ooh. Ooh!

426
00:20:42,037 --> 00:20:43,382
I'm sorry, Ray.

427
00:20:43,383 --> 00:20:45,675
Adele got a little Fender bender.

428
00:20:45,676 --> 00:20:46,978
My bad.

429
00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:49,523
9?

430
00:20:50,513 --> 00:20:51,932
9?

431
00:20:52,269 --> 00:20:54,049
Come on, mama needs a 9!

432
00:20:55,415 --> 00:20:57,598
Oh, whoa. Nice tan, buddy.

433
00:20:57,599 --> 00:20:59,009
Call me when you get a job.

434
00:21:01,486 --> 00:21:04,564
10? 10?

435
00:21:04,565 --> 00:21:06,451
Where is my perfect 10?

436
00:21:10,749 --> 00:21:12,359
Well, hello.

437
00:21:12,832 --> 00:21:14,677
Bonnie Wheeler.

438
00:21:14,678 --> 00:21:16,626
Looks like we're a perfect match.