1
00:00:02,260 --> 00:00:05,595
(Archer moaning deliriously)
2
00:00:05,597 --> 00:00:07,564
LANA: Archer.
3
00:00:07,566 --> 00:00:08,565
ARCHER: Lana?
4
00:00:08,567 --> 00:00:09,566
(Lana yelps)
5
00:00:09,568 --> 00:00:10,567
Lana!
6
00:00:10,569 --> 00:00:11,568
LANA: Whoa, Jesus Christ!
7
00:00:11,570 --> 00:00:12,736
Chill out, Miggs!
8
00:00:12,738 --> 00:00:13,971
ARCHER: I'm sorry, it's just
9
00:00:13,973 --> 00:00:14,972
been so long.
10
00:00:14,974 --> 00:00:15,973
LANA: Okay, it's been...
11
00:00:15,975 --> 00:00:16,974
ARCHER: Oh, my God.
12
00:00:16,976 --> 00:00:17,975
You're pregnant again?!
13
00:00:17,977 --> 00:00:18,976
LANA: What?
14
00:00:18,978 --> 00:00:19,977
ARCHER: How long have I been
15
00:00:19,979 --> 00:00:21,511
down here, left to rot in this
16
00:00:21,513 --> 00:00:23,347
godforsaken hole?!
17
00:00:23,349 --> 00:00:26,183
LANA: Like... three weeks.
18
00:00:26,185 --> 00:00:27,517
ARCHER: Hmm, seems so much
19
00:00:27,519 --> 00:00:28,518
longer than that.
20
00:00:28,520 --> 00:00:29,519
LANA: It...
21
00:00:29,521 --> 00:00:30,520
ARCHER: So, please tell me
22
00:00:30,522 --> 00:00:32,022
that's an entire canard à la
23
00:00:32,024 --> 00:00:33,490
presse with a file in it.
24
00:00:33,492 --> 00:00:34,491
LANA: Half a chicken, no
25
00:00:34,493 --> 00:00:35,692
file, just that weird
26
00:00:35,694 --> 00:00:37,194
quasi-cornbread they have here.
27
00:00:37,196 --> 00:00:38,195
ARCHER: Ugh, why do you even
28
00:00:38,197 --> 00:00:39,196
bother?
29
00:00:39,198 --> 00:00:40,197
LANA: That's weird, I was
30
00:00:40,199 --> 00:00:41,598
asking myself the same thing on
31
00:00:41,600 --> 00:00:42,699
the way down here.
32
00:00:42,701 --> 00:00:43,700
ARCHER: And then brought
33
00:00:43,702 --> 00:00:45,202
crappy food anyway?
34
00:00:45,204 --> 00:00:46,203
LANA: And then left?
35
00:00:46,205 --> 00:00:47,270
ARCHER: No, no, no, wait,
36
00:00:47,272 --> 00:00:48,271
come on, Lana, I-I'm sorry, but
37
00:00:48,273 --> 00:00:49,272
I-I'm starting to lose it down
38
00:00:49,274 --> 00:00:49,973
here.
39
00:00:49,975 --> 00:00:50,640
You-you got to make him let
40
00:00:50,642 --> 00:00:51,641
me go!
41
00:00:51,643 --> 00:00:52,642
LANA: Make him how?
42
00:00:52,644 --> 00:00:53,643
ARCHER: Well, I hate to
43
00:00:53,645 --> 00:00:54,644
even ask, but...
44
00:00:54,646 --> 00:00:55,645
LANA: Blow him?
45
00:00:55,647 --> 00:00:56,646
ARCHER: Your words.
46
00:00:56,648 --> 00:00:57,647
LANA: And then what, Archer,
47
00:00:57,649 --> 00:00:58,648
you want me to blow the whole
48
00:00:58,650 --> 00:00:59,649
army?
49
00:00:59,651 --> 00:01:00,650
ARCHER: How is there still
50
00:01:00,652 --> 00:01:01,651
an army?
51
00:01:01,653 --> 00:01:02,652
How have the rebels not wiped
52
00:01:02,654 --> 00:01:04,054
them out already?
53
00:01:04,056 --> 00:01:05,055
LANA: Because turns out,
54
00:01:05,057 --> 00:01:06,289
he's actually very good at
55
00:01:06,291 --> 00:01:07,891
commanding an army.
56
00:01:07,893 --> 00:01:08,892
CYRIL: And as Third and
57
00:01:08,894 --> 00:01:10,327
Fourth Battalion withdraw, here
58
00:01:10,329 --> 00:01:12,029
comes First Armored, and now the
59
00:01:12,031 --> 00:01:14,164
rebels are outflanked.
60
00:01:14,166 --> 00:01:15,132
COMANDANTE (laughs): Sir,
61
00:01:15,134 --> 00:01:16,366
it's brilliant!
62
00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:17,534
CYRIL: A classic pincher
63
00:01:17,536 --> 00:01:18,535
movement.
64
00:01:18,537 --> 00:01:19,536
Just like Hannibal at the battle
65
00:01:19,538 --> 00:01:20,637
of Cannae.
66
00:01:20,639 --> 00:01:22,039
And also Keith, in my
67
00:01:22,041 --> 00:01:23,206
Warhammer guild.
68
00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:24,541
LANA: So, get used to that
69
00:01:24,543 --> 00:01:26,043
weird cornbread, 'cause you
70
00:01:26,045 --> 00:01:27,044
might be down here a...
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00:01:27,046 --> 00:01:28,211
ARCHER: Lana, I need a
72
00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:30,380
woman's touch!
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(Lana grunts)
74
00:01:31,683 --> 00:01:33,350
Oh! Ow!
75
00:01:33,352 --> 00:01:34,551
I'm sorry, Lana.
76
00:01:34,553 --> 00:01:35,919
I said a woman, not a
77
00:01:35,921 --> 00:01:37,521
stevedore who lost his hand
78
00:01:37,523 --> 00:01:39,189
in a stevedoring accident
79
00:01:39,191 --> 00:01:40,490
and then got a hand transplant
80
00:01:40,492 --> 00:01:42,692
from an actual bear.
81
00:01:42,694 --> 00:01:44,027
LANA: So, did you want to
82
00:01:44,029 --> 00:01:45,028
just do it right through the
83
00:01:45,030 --> 00:01:46,029
bars or...?
84
00:01:46,031 --> 00:01:48,999
ARCHER: I mean, we do.
85
00:01:49,001 --> 00:01:51,368
And sometimes they do.
86
00:01:51,370 --> 00:01:52,702
CALDÉRON: Hello.
87
00:01:52,704 --> 00:01:53,703
LANA: I... wait.
88
00:01:53,705 --> 00:01:55,172
So, in three weeks, you go from
89
00:01:55,174 --> 00:01:57,074
you're gonna execute Archer
90
00:01:57,076 --> 00:01:58,208
to now you guys are, like,
91
00:01:58,210 --> 00:01:59,276
swinger pals?
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00:01:59,278 --> 00:02:00,343
CALDÉRON: Well, I wouldn't
93
00:02:00,345 --> 00:02:01,411
say "pals."
94
00:02:01,413 --> 00:02:02,946
ARCHER: Wow, not what you
95
00:02:02,948 --> 00:02:03,947
said yesterday.
96
00:02:03,949 --> 00:02:04,948
CALDÉRON: Oh, come on, that
97
00:02:04,950 --> 00:02:06,183
was the pruno talking.
98
00:02:06,185 --> 00:02:07,551
LANA: Well, I hate to break
99
00:02:07,553 --> 00:02:08,919
up this delightful ménage, but
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00:02:08,921 --> 00:02:10,220
Presidente Cyril wants her back
101
00:02:10,222 --> 00:02:11,455
upstairs.
102
00:02:11,457 --> 00:02:12,456
ARCHER: Wait, what?
103
00:02:12,458 --> 00:02:13,557
CALDÉRON: What?
104
00:02:13,559 --> 00:02:14,558
JULIANA: Why.
105
00:02:14,560 --> 00:02:15,559
LANA: Guess.
106
00:02:15,561 --> 00:02:16,726
JULIANA: Ah.
107
00:02:16,728 --> 00:02:18,128
LANA: Mm.
108
00:02:18,130 --> 00:02:19,129
CALDÉRON: Ow!
109
00:02:19,131 --> 00:02:20,130
Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait,
110
00:02:20,132 --> 00:02:21,131
wait, wait, wait!
111
00:02:21,133 --> 00:02:22,132
BOTH: What?
112
00:02:22,134 --> 00:02:24,067
CALDÉRON: Archer, do you want
113
00:02:24,069 --> 00:02:26,303
me to move over one?
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00:02:26,305 --> 00:02:28,371
ARCHER: Eh.
115
00:03:08,513 --> 00:03:10,514
CYRIL: Ah, Madame First Lady.
116
00:03:10,516 --> 00:03:12,916
So good of you to join me.
117
00:03:12,918 --> 00:03:13,917
JULIANA: It's not as if I
118
00:03:13,919 --> 00:03:14,918
had a choice.
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CYRIL: Well...
120
00:03:15,921 --> 00:03:16,920
JULIANA: Nor am I still the
121
00:03:16,922 --> 00:03:17,921
the first lady.
122
00:03:17,923 --> 00:03:18,955
CYRIL: Well, maybe not
123
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technically, since your husband
124
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divorced you and then was
125
00:03:21,126 --> 00:03:22,926
immediately deposed by me, but
126
00:03:22,928 --> 00:03:24,628
the situation is, as they say,
127
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fluid.
128
00:03:26,031 --> 00:03:27,097
LANA: Ugh.
129
00:03:27,099 --> 00:03:28,265
I brought her, can I go now?
130
00:03:28,267 --> 00:03:29,332
CYRIL: Yes, for the love of
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God, get out.
132
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LANA: I meant home.
133
00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:32,669
PAM (laughing): What are you,
134
00:03:32,671 --> 00:03:33,670
nuts?
135
00:03:33,672 --> 00:03:35,038
Cap'n Crunch here just
136
00:03:35,040 --> 00:03:36,039
took all the coca fields back
137
00:03:36,041 --> 00:03:37,040
from the rebels.
138
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We're sitting on an endless
139
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supply.
140
00:03:39,044 --> 00:03:40,043
LANA: Of what, coca leaf
141
00:03:40,045 --> 00:03:41,111
smoothies?
142
00:03:41,113 --> 00:03:42,379
(rhythmic gulping)
143
00:03:42,381 --> 00:03:43,380
Oh, my God.
144
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That's a coca leaf smoothie.
145
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CHERLENE: And they're gross.
146
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It basically tastes like a fart
147
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of itself, but it's better than
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the cocaine donuts and whipped
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cocaine she was eating.
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(Pam burps)
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PAM: 'Cause that's just empty
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calories.
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LANA: Well, and cocaine.
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PAM: Which, if I'm being
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totally honest, I maybe might
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have a problem with.
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LANA: No.
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CYRIL: And, Lana, the rebels
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00:04:01,500 --> 00:04:02,499
still control the airport.
160
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It's their HQ.
161
00:04:03,569 --> 00:04:04,901
So, unless you want to walk, you
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can't go home.
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MALORY: And why on Earth
164
00:04:07,039 --> 00:04:08,038
would you want to?
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(Lana sighs)
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CYRIL: Uh...
167
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MALORY: Why bother going
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00:04:11,043 --> 00:04:12,042
back?
169
00:04:12,044 --> 00:04:13,043
The U.S. government stole your
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00:04:13,045 --> 00:04:14,044
livelihood, forced you to become
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a criminal.
172
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And I hate to say it, but it's
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00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:18,982
not like you have a man waiting
174
00:04:18,984 --> 00:04:20,050
for you.
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LANA: I... You know...
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MALORY: Whereas here we have
177
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everything we need.
178
00:04:24,056 --> 00:04:25,322
It's like San Marcos has been
179
00:04:25,324 --> 00:04:26,923
waiting thousands of years for
180
00:04:26,925 --> 00:04:28,191
us to arrive.
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00:04:28,193 --> 00:04:29,392
Lana, this could be our...
182
00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:30,393
LANA: Don't.
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00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:31,394
MALORY: Zion, yes, there, I
184
00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:32,395
said it.
185
00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:33,396
(Pam burps)
186
00:04:33,398 --> 00:04:34,397
PAM: Wait, they got weed
187
00:04:34,399 --> 00:04:35,398
here, too?
188
00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:36,399
LANA: That's not what the
189
00:04:36,401 --> 00:04:37,400
song's about!
190
00:04:37,402 --> 00:04:38,401
CHERLENE: Told you.
191
00:04:38,403 --> 00:04:39,402
LANA: But I just this second
192
00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:40,437
realized why you want to stay
193
00:04:40,439 --> 00:04:42,005
down here.
194
00:04:42,007 --> 00:04:43,206
Cyril's just the Vader to your
195
00:04:43,208 --> 00:04:44,574
Palpatine.
196
00:04:44,576 --> 00:04:46,042
MALORY: Is that a reference
197
00:04:46,044 --> 00:04:47,210
I should get, or...?
198
00:04:47,212 --> 00:04:48,345
LANA: Seriously?
199
00:04:48,347 --> 00:04:49,379
MALORY: Well, I'm sorry,
200
00:04:49,381 --> 00:04:50,680
Lana, I didn't go to rabbinical
201
00:04:50,682 --> 00:04:52,015
school.
202
00:04:52,017 --> 00:04:53,116
LANA: It's from... No, you
203
00:04:53,118 --> 00:04:54,384
know what? Never mind.
204
00:04:54,386 --> 00:04:55,452
But, spoiler alert, Vader ends
205
00:04:55,454 --> 00:04:56,453
up killing Palpatine.
206
00:04:56,455 --> 00:04:57,454
CYRIL: Hey.
207
00:04:57,456 --> 00:04:58,455
CHERLENE: But only for three
208
00:04:58,457 --> 00:04:59,456
days, right?
209
00:04:59,458 --> 00:05:00,457
And then he moves the rock and
210
00:05:00,459 --> 00:05:01,458
comes out of his cave stronger
211
00:05:01,460 --> 00:05:02,459
than ever.
212
00:05:02,461 --> 00:05:03,460
PAM: Then he shuts off the
213
00:05:03,462 --> 00:05:04,461
tractor beam, releasing the Jews
214
00:05:04,463 --> 00:05:05,462
from captivity.
215
00:05:05,464 --> 00:05:06,463
LANA: What?
216
00:05:06,465 --> 00:05:07,464
CYRIL: Hey.
217
00:05:07,466 --> 00:05:08,465
MALORY: Wait, yes, now that
218
00:05:08,467 --> 00:05:09,432
sounds familiar.
219
00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:11,368
LANA: It cannot possibly.
220
00:05:11,370 --> 00:05:12,369
MALORY: Gospel of Luke?
221
00:05:12,371 --> 00:05:13,370
CYRIL: Hey.
222
00:05:13,372 --> 00:05:14,371
LANA: Oh for... Ray, you used
223
00:05:14,373 --> 00:05:15,372
to be a preacher, you want to
224
00:05:15,374 --> 00:05:16,373
back me up here?
225
00:05:16,375 --> 00:05:17,374
RAY: I actually don't know.
226
00:05:17,376 --> 00:05:18,375
My church didn't really do the
227
00:05:18,377 --> 00:05:19,409
New Testament.
228
00:05:19,411 --> 00:05:20,710
LANA: The one with Jesus
229
00:05:20,712 --> 00:05:22,212
Christ in it.
230
00:05:22,214 --> 00:05:23,280
RAY: I mean, I take your
231
00:05:23,282 --> 00:05:24,381
word for it, but...
232
00:05:24,383 --> 00:05:25,482
CYRIL: Hey!
233
00:05:25,484 --> 00:05:26,549
Will you idiots get out?!
234
00:05:26,551 --> 00:05:27,550
I'm trying to talk to the first
235
00:05:27,552 --> 00:05:28,551
lady!
236
00:05:28,553 --> 00:05:29,552
CHERLENE: Of what, this
237
00:05:29,554 --> 00:05:31,087
country or country music?
238
00:05:31,089 --> 00:05:32,555
'Cause I'm first lady of both!
239
00:05:32,557 --> 00:05:33,590
CYRIL No, you're not...
240
00:05:33,592 --> 00:05:35,925
CHERLENE: Outlaw country!
241
00:05:35,927 --> 00:05:38,061
(jail door bangs shut)
242
00:05:38,063 --> 00:05:39,162
(Cherlene sighs)
243
00:05:39,164 --> 00:05:40,096
CALDÉRON: Oh, my God, my
244
00:05:40,098 --> 00:05:41,097
beautiful and also
245
00:05:41,099 --> 00:05:42,399
multi-talented wife!
246
00:05:42,401 --> 00:05:43,967
You are here!
247
00:05:43,969 --> 00:05:45,068
CHERLENE: I know, right?
248
00:05:45,070 --> 00:05:46,436
It's like, finally.
249
00:05:46,438 --> 00:05:47,637
ARCHER: As in...
250
00:05:47,639 --> 00:05:48,571
this is a good thing?
251
00:05:48,573 --> 00:05:49,406
(plays random notes)
252
00:05:49,408 --> 00:05:50,173
CHERLENE: Duh!
253
00:05:50,175 --> 00:05:51,174
I'm finally gonna get the outlaw
254
00:05:51,176 --> 00:05:53,109
country cred I deserve.
255
00:05:53,111 --> 00:05:54,277
CALDÉRON: Oh, my God, you've
256
00:05:54,279 --> 00:05:55,412
always deserved it.
257
00:05:55,414 --> 00:05:56,413
ARCHER: Wait, how does being
258
00:05:56,415 --> 00:05:57,414
in jail...?
259
00:05:57,416 --> 00:05:58,415
CHERLENE: Paging Dr. Black,
260
00:05:58,417 --> 00:05:59,949
Dr. Man In Black!
261
00:05:59,951 --> 00:06:01,484
Johnny Cash was in Folsom Prison
262
00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:02,986
and San Quentin, so...
263
00:06:02,988 --> 00:06:05,021
ARCHER: Yeah, to visit.
264
00:06:05,023 --> 00:06:06,189
CHERLENE: Hmm?
265
00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:07,190
ARCHER: He just played for
266
00:06:07,192 --> 00:06:08,191
the prisoners, dummy.
267
00:06:08,193 --> 00:06:11,027
He wasn't actually in prison.
268
00:06:11,029 --> 00:06:12,362
(plays "womp womp")
269
00:06:12,364 --> 00:06:13,363
But don't worry.
270
00:06:13,365 --> 00:06:14,364
We're gonna get out of here and
271
00:06:14,366 --> 00:06:16,032
go join the rebels.
272
00:06:16,034 --> 00:06:17,033
CALDÉRON: Yes, then you and
273
00:06:17,035 --> 00:06:18,301
I, my beautiful wife, will live
274
00:06:18,303 --> 00:06:20,036
a simple life in the hills,
275
00:06:20,038 --> 00:06:21,638
scratching shit food, like yams,
276
00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:23,139
out of the ground with a, uh,
277
00:06:23,141 --> 00:06:24,941
yam-scratcher.
278
00:06:24,943 --> 00:06:25,942
CHERLENE: Okay, A... start
279
00:06:25,944 --> 00:06:27,010
counting backwards from a
280
00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:28,044
million years, and when you get
281
00:06:28,046 --> 00:06:29,212
to zero that still won't
282
00:06:29,214 --> 00:06:30,547
happen.
283
00:06:30,549 --> 00:06:31,548
CALDÉRON: Aw.
284
00:06:31,550 --> 00:06:33,616
CHERLENE: And B... how...
285
00:06:33,618 --> 00:06:35,185
how do we get out of here?
286
00:06:35,187 --> 00:06:36,619
ARCHER: Well, we're, uh,
287
00:06:36,621 --> 00:06:38,288
still fine-tuning it, but...
288
00:06:38,290 --> 00:06:39,289
CALDÉRON: We have no plan,
289
00:06:39,291 --> 00:06:40,290
whatsoever.
290
00:06:40,292 --> 00:06:41,291
CHERLENE: Okay, good, because
291
00:06:41,293 --> 00:06:42,359
I didn't want to step on
292
00:06:42,361 --> 00:06:44,494
anybody's toes, but byoink.
293
00:06:44,496 --> 00:06:45,495
CALDÉRON: Whaaaaat?
294
00:06:45,497 --> 00:06:46,496
ARCHER: Where did you get
295
00:06:46,498 --> 00:06:47,497
that?
296
00:06:47,499 --> 00:06:48,665
CHERLENE: Let's just say,
297
00:06:48,667 --> 00:06:50,133
"I honestly don't know."
298
00:06:50,135 --> 00:06:51,134
ARCHER: Fair enough.
299
00:06:51,136 --> 00:06:52,135
CHERLENE: Cyril says the
300
00:06:52,137 --> 00:06:53,236
rebel headquarters are...
301
00:06:53,238 --> 00:06:55,538
Wait, is it "are" or is it "is"?
302
00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:57,173
ARCHER: It's "where," idiot!
303
00:06:57,175 --> 00:06:58,174
CHERLENE: The airport!
304
00:06:58,176 --> 00:06:59,209
Jesus!
305
00:06:59,211 --> 00:07:00,210
CALDÉRON: And you, sir, will
306
00:07:00,212 --> 00:07:01,578
keep a civil tongue in your head
307
00:07:01,580 --> 00:07:02,579
when you are addressing
308
00:07:02,581 --> 00:07:03,580
the First Lady of the
309
00:07:03,582 --> 00:07:04,714
government-in-exile of La
310
00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:06,316
República de San Marcos!
311
00:07:06,318 --> 00:07:07,217
CHERLENE: And also country
312
00:07:07,219 --> 00:07:08,051
music.
313
00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:09,552
ARCHER: I facetiously beg
314
00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:10,920
milady's pardon.
315
00:07:10,922 --> 00:07:11,988
CHERLENE: Oh, milady
316
00:07:11,990 --> 00:07:13,590
facetiously grants it.
317
00:07:13,592 --> 00:07:15,024
ARCHER: Oh, goody.
318
00:07:15,026 --> 00:07:16,226
Now let's steal a car, go join
319
00:07:16,228 --> 00:07:17,527
the rebels, then come back here
320
00:07:17,529 --> 00:07:19,062
and crush Cyril's stupid army.
321
00:07:19,064 --> 00:07:20,063
CALDÉRON: You make it sound
322
00:07:20,065 --> 00:07:21,064
so easy.
323
00:07:21,066 --> 00:07:21,998
ARCHER (chuckling): Well,
324
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:22,665
it's Cyril.
325
00:07:22,667 --> 00:07:23,666
I mean, unless he's got a
326
00:07:23,668 --> 00:07:25,368
nuclear warhead in his pants...
327
00:07:25,370 --> 00:07:26,369
CHERLENE: Which he totally
328
00:07:26,371 --> 00:07:28,004
does.
329
00:07:28,006 --> 00:07:30,173
KRIEGER: Which, guys, can we
330
00:07:30,175 --> 00:07:31,274
talk about this?
331
00:07:31,276 --> 00:07:32,208
KRIEGER CLONE 1: The time for
332
00:07:32,210 --> 00:07:34,210
talk is kaput, Klon-Bruder.
333
00:07:34,212 --> 00:07:36,112
Now is the time for action!
334
00:07:36,114 --> 00:07:38,581
KRIEGER CLONE 2: Clone bone!
335
00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:39,949
CHERLENE: And by that I mean
336
00:07:39,951 --> 00:07:42,218
his... you know...
337
00:07:42,220 --> 00:07:43,219
ARCHER: Yeah, we...
338
00:07:43,221 --> 00:07:45,221
CHERLENE: Let me finish!
339
00:07:45,223 --> 00:07:46,556
...penis.
340
00:07:46,558 --> 00:07:47,557
No, you ruined it.
341
00:07:47,559 --> 00:07:49,392
And by "it," I meant the moment.
342
00:07:49,394 --> 00:07:52,061
Not his penis.
343
00:07:52,063 --> 00:07:53,029
ARCHER: I...
344
00:07:53,031 --> 00:07:54,931
CHERLENE: Penis.
345
00:07:58,536 --> 00:07:59,602
ARCHER: Will you shut up?!
346
00:07:59,604 --> 00:08:01,037
I know what I'm doing!
347
00:08:01,039 --> 00:08:02,205
CALDÉRON: Yes, but don't do
348
00:08:02,207 --> 00:08:03,406
what you are doing!
349
00:08:03,408 --> 00:08:04,974
(Caldéron and Cherlene yelp)
350
00:08:04,976 --> 00:08:06,609
(Archer chuckles)
351
00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:07,544
CALDÉRON: Are you crazy?!
352
00:08:07,546 --> 00:08:09,112
This car is worth one quarter of
353
00:08:09,114 --> 00:08:10,113
$1 million!
354
00:08:10,115 --> 00:08:10,980
CHERLENE: Well, was.
355
00:08:10,982 --> 00:08:11,915
ARCHER: And did you ever
356
00:08:11,917 --> 00:08:12,715
think maybe your fleet of
357
00:08:12,717 --> 00:08:14,284
priceless cars is the reason
358
00:08:14,286 --> 00:08:15,318
you're fighting off a
359
00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:16,219
rebellion?
360
00:08:16,221 --> 00:08:17,253
CALDÉRON: I'm fighting the
361
00:08:17,255 --> 00:08:18,154
rebels because that is what we
362
00:08:18,156 --> 00:08:19,155
do!
363
00:08:19,157 --> 00:08:20,256
My father fought the rebels, his
364
00:08:20,258 --> 00:08:21,257
father fought the rebels...
365
00:08:21,259 --> 00:08:22,158
CHERLENE: So, like a family
366
00:08:22,160 --> 00:08:23,159
business.
367
00:08:23,161 --> 00:08:24,160
ARCHER: That manufactures
368
00:08:24,162 --> 00:08:25,161
oppression.
369
00:08:25,163 --> 00:08:26,162
CALDÉRON: Well, and cocaine.
370
00:08:26,164 --> 00:08:27,063
In fact...
371
00:08:27,065 --> 00:08:28,064
CHERLENE: Stop!
372
00:08:28,066 --> 00:08:30,300
(Archer and Caldéron scream)
373
00:08:30,302 --> 00:08:31,634
(tires screeching)
374
00:08:31,636 --> 00:08:32,902
ARCHER: What?!
375
00:08:32,904 --> 00:08:33,903
CHERLENE: That.
376
00:08:33,905 --> 00:08:34,904
(Archer gasps)
377
00:08:34,906 --> 00:08:36,105
I mean, if you think we have
378
00:08:36,107 --> 00:08:37,307
time.
379
00:08:37,309 --> 00:08:38,508
(tiger roars)
380
00:08:38,510 --> 00:08:39,509
ARCHER: I... Is there a
381
00:08:39,511 --> 00:08:40,343
tiger?
382
00:08:40,345 --> 00:08:41,344
CALDÉRON: Of course there is
383
00:08:41,346 --> 00:08:42,245
a tiger.
384
00:08:42,247 --> 00:08:43,112
Where did you think you are,
385
00:08:43,114 --> 00:08:44,514
Tegucigalpa?
386
00:08:44,516 --> 00:08:46,516
(Archer giggles gleefully)
387
00:08:46,518 --> 00:08:48,284
(tires squealing)
388
00:08:48,286 --> 00:08:49,586
CYRIL: And so, by the power
389
00:08:49,588 --> 00:08:51,521
self-vested in me, I now
390
00:08:51,523 --> 00:08:54,157
pronounce us man and wife, and I
391
00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:56,259
may also kiss the bride.
392
00:08:56,261 --> 00:08:58,595
(Cyril kissing, Juliana grunts)
393
00:08:59,630 --> 00:09:01,364
PAM: Yay!
394
00:09:01,366 --> 00:09:02,632
MALORY: Ugh, second worst
395
00:09:02,634 --> 00:09:03,633
wedding ever.
396
00:09:03,635 --> 00:09:04,534
RAY: Yeah, but at least
397
00:09:04,536 --> 00:09:05,702
nobody died.
398
00:09:05,704 --> 00:09:07,203
PAM (laughing): Yet!
399
00:09:07,205 --> 00:09:08,471
(clears throat)
400
00:09:08,473 --> 00:09:09,472
Inappropes.
401
00:09:09,474 --> 00:09:10,373
MALORY: What is wrong with
402
00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:11,207
you?
403
00:09:11,209 --> 00:09:12,208
PAM: I'm trying to make that
404
00:09:12,210 --> 00:09:13,676
a thing people say, like,
405
00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:16,179
"Damn, dawg, that's inappropes!"
406
00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:17,881
Plus, I think I'm addicted to
407
00:09:17,883 --> 00:09:18,982
cocaine.
408
00:09:18,984 --> 00:09:19,983
MALORY: Well, but look on the
409
00:09:19,985 --> 00:09:22,185
bright side.
410
00:09:22,187 --> 00:09:23,186
With any luck at all, it will
411
00:09:23,188 --> 00:09:24,521
save me the trouble of killing
412
00:09:24,523 --> 00:09:26,322
you myself.
413
00:09:26,324 --> 00:09:27,891
PAM (sniffling): Damn,
414
00:09:27,893 --> 00:09:29,025
dawg...
415
00:09:29,027 --> 00:09:30,293
RAY: Inappropes.
416
00:09:30,295 --> 00:09:32,495
PAM: Yay!
417
00:09:32,497 --> 00:09:33,963
ARCHER (quietly): Yay!
418
00:09:33,965 --> 00:09:35,031
Yay!
419
00:09:35,033 --> 00:09:36,332
(tiger roars)
420
00:09:36,334 --> 00:09:39,135
They should've sent a poet.
421
00:09:39,137 --> 00:09:40,537
Oh, and some meat.
422
00:09:40,539 --> 00:09:42,171
Do we have any meat?
423
00:09:42,173 --> 00:09:43,373
(elephant trumpets)
424
00:09:43,375 --> 00:09:44,474
CALDÉRON: Literally tons.
425
00:09:44,476 --> 00:09:45,475
ARCHER: No, I didn't mean
426
00:09:45,477 --> 00:09:46,676
another animal.
427
00:09:46,678 --> 00:09:48,077
I meant like a steak, or some...
428
00:09:48,079 --> 00:09:49,379
CALDÉRON: Typical American.
429
00:09:49,381 --> 00:09:50,547
You think meat comes from the
430
00:09:50,549 --> 00:09:51,714
supermercado, all wrapped in a
431
00:09:51,716 --> 00:09:53,249
nice plastic wrap.
432
00:09:53,251 --> 00:09:54,083
ARCHER: Yeah, you're
433
00:09:54,085 --> 00:09:54,984
describing meat.
434
00:09:54,986 --> 00:09:55,652
CALDÉRON: No, no, no.
435
00:09:55,654 --> 00:09:57,086
Meat is blood and bones and
436
00:09:57,088 --> 00:09:58,087
sinew!
437
00:09:58,089 --> 00:09:59,022
ARCHER: Well, now you're
438
00:09:59,024 --> 00:10:00,323
describing not-meat.
439
00:10:00,325 --> 00:10:01,324
CALDÉRON: Meat is whatever
440
00:10:01,326 --> 00:10:03,026
the tiger says is meat, because
441
00:10:03,028 --> 00:10:04,894
God made him the boss and all
442
00:10:04,896 --> 00:10:06,896
the other animals his food!
443
00:10:06,898 --> 00:10:08,531
(tiger roars)
444
00:10:08,533 --> 00:10:10,033
ARCHER: Hang on, buddy.
445
00:10:10,035 --> 00:10:11,701
And thank you, George Bore-well,
446
00:10:11,703 --> 00:10:13,202
for that clunky analogy in
447
00:10:13,204 --> 00:10:15,038
defense of totalitarianism, but
448
00:10:15,040 --> 00:10:16,239
I'm not feeding Shane an
449
00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:17,240
elephant.
450
00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:18,241
CHERLENE: Who the hell is...
451
00:10:18,243 --> 00:10:19,375
(gasps)
452
00:10:19,377 --> 00:10:20,910
Oh, my God, he's totally a
453
00:10:20,912 --> 00:10:22,045
Shane.
454
00:10:22,047 --> 00:10:23,513
So let me bounce this off you
455
00:10:23,515 --> 00:10:25,281
guys...
456
00:10:25,283 --> 00:10:26,282
KRIEGER: What say we don't
457
00:10:26,284 --> 00:10:27,517
launch this giant nerve gas
458
00:10:27,519 --> 00:10:28,952
missile at, uh...
459
00:10:28,954 --> 00:10:30,386
where did you say you were
460
00:10:30,388 --> 00:10:31,387
launching it?
461
00:10:31,389 --> 00:10:32,422
KRIEGER CLONE 1: Wouldn't you
462
00:10:32,424 --> 00:10:33,289
like to know?
463
00:10:33,291 --> 00:10:34,624
(hearty laughter)
464
00:10:34,626 --> 00:10:35,692
KRIEGER: I would, actually.
465
00:10:35,694 --> 00:10:36,693
Come on, you guys are acting
466
00:10:36,695 --> 00:10:38,528
a little... insane.
467
00:10:38,530 --> 00:10:39,529
KRIEGER CLONE 1: Do you know
468
00:10:39,531 --> 00:10:40,530
what's insane?!
469
00:10:40,532 --> 00:10:41,898
KRIEGER: Yeah, this.
470
00:10:41,900 --> 00:10:43,466
All of it, everything.
471
00:10:43,468 --> 00:10:45,034
The rocket, uh... I'm not really
472
00:10:45,036 --> 00:10:45,702
comfortable with the
473
00:10:45,704 --> 00:10:46,536
clone-bone.
474
00:10:46,538 --> 00:10:47,537
KRIEGER CLONE 1: You're not
475
00:10:47,539 --> 00:10:48,404
doing it right.
476
00:10:48,406 --> 00:10:49,305
Now move, so I can begin the
477
00:10:49,307 --> 00:10:50,473
launch sequence.
478
00:10:50,475 --> 00:10:52,709
KRIEGER: Over my dead...
479
00:10:52,711 --> 00:10:53,910
...body, man that was a jinx,
480
00:10:53,912 --> 00:10:54,544
huh?
481
00:10:54,546 --> 00:10:55,378
(cocks gun)
482
00:10:55,380 --> 00:10:56,913
No, no, no, wait, wait, wait!
483
00:10:56,915 --> 00:10:57,914
ARCHER: Hang on!
484
00:10:57,916 --> 00:10:59,382
As amazing as it would be,
485
00:10:59,384 --> 00:11:01,050
we can't take Shane with us.
486
00:11:01,052 --> 00:11:01,918
CHERLENE: Yeah, we can,
487
00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:02,585
watch.
488
00:11:02,587 --> 00:11:03,453
BOTH: No, no, no, no!
489
00:11:03,455 --> 00:11:05,221
No, don't!
490
00:11:05,223 --> 00:11:06,322
(low rumbling growl)
491
00:11:06,324 --> 00:11:07,323
CALDÉRON: Okay, okay, okay,
492
00:11:07,325 --> 00:11:08,925
okay.
493
00:11:08,927 --> 00:11:10,460
ARCHER: Carol, listen to me
494
00:11:10,462 --> 00:11:11,961
very closely.
495
00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:12,962
CHERLENE: Why, you gonna walk
496
00:11:12,964 --> 00:11:14,063
me through your organic method
497
00:11:14,065 --> 00:11:15,264
of vaginal hygiene?
498
00:11:15,266 --> 00:11:16,265
ARCHER: My what?
499
00:11:16,267 --> 00:11:17,233
CHERLENE: You're a bigger
500
00:11:17,235 --> 00:11:18,334
pussy than Shane!
501
00:11:18,336 --> 00:11:19,636
Come here, boy! (Smacking lips)
502
00:11:19,638 --> 00:11:22,405
(tiger roars, Caldéron screams)
503
00:11:22,407 --> 00:11:24,173
ARCHER AND CHERLENE: Shane!
504
00:11:24,175 --> 00:11:25,241
(Caldéron screams)
505
00:11:25,243 --> 00:11:26,442
CHERLENE: Do something!
506
00:11:26,444 --> 00:11:27,510
(Caldéron screaming)
507
00:11:27,512 --> 00:11:29,445
ARCHER: Like what?
508
00:11:29,447 --> 00:11:31,080
KRIEGER CLONE 1: Get him!
509
00:11:31,082 --> 00:11:33,983
(grunting)
510
00:11:33,985 --> 00:11:34,984
KRIEGER CLONE 2: We're
511
00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:35,652
coming, brother!
512
00:11:35,654 --> 00:11:37,520
KRIEGER CLONE 3: Hiy...!
513
00:11:37,522 --> 00:11:39,188
(gunshot)
514
00:11:39,190 --> 00:11:40,189
(Krieger Clone 3 screams)
515
00:11:40,191 --> 00:11:41,190
KRIEGER CLONE 2: No...!
516
00:11:41,192 --> 00:11:42,458
KRIEGER CLONE 1: Brother...!
517
00:11:42,460 --> 00:11:43,326
(thuds)
518
00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:45,294
You bastard!
519
00:11:45,296 --> 00:11:47,664
Brother, the launch sequence!
520
00:11:47,666 --> 00:11:48,598
KRIEGER: No!
521
00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:49,932
(keyboard clicking)
522
00:11:49,934 --> 00:11:51,000
(strained grunting)
523
00:11:51,002 --> 00:11:52,035
(gunshot)
524
00:11:52,037 --> 00:11:54,170
KRIEGER CLONE 1: Don't stop!
525
00:11:54,172 --> 00:11:55,438
(four gunshots)
526
00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:57,206
(grunting)
527
00:11:57,208 --> 00:11:58,207
KRIEGER CLONE 2: Almost...
528
00:11:58,209 --> 00:11:59,342
there.
529
00:11:59,344 --> 00:12:01,144
KRIEGER: Oh, come on!
530
00:12:01,146 --> 00:12:02,945
KRIEGER CLONE 2: Shut... up.
531
00:12:02,947 --> 00:12:04,013
> SEXY ROBOT VOICE: Launch
532
00:12:04,015 --> 00:12:05,148
sequence initiated.
533
00:12:05,150 --> 00:12:06,382
KRIEGER: No!
534
00:12:06,384 --> 00:12:07,884
KRIEGER CLONE 1 (sobs): No!
535
00:12:07,886 --> 00:12:09,352
(thuds)
536
00:12:09,354 --> 00:12:12,155
(strained grunting)
537
00:12:12,157 --> 00:12:14,457
(choking)
538
00:12:14,459 --> 00:12:16,159
KRIEGER: Ha-ha!
539
00:12:16,161 --> 00:12:17,326
It doesn't work with a bow...
540
00:12:17,328 --> 00:12:20,363
tiiiiiiiiieeeeee!
541
00:12:20,365 --> 00:12:23,232
(loud thuds)
542
00:12:23,234 --> 00:12:24,634
ARCHER: Shane!
543
00:12:24,636 --> 00:12:25,468
Shane...!
544
00:12:25,470 --> 00:12:26,402
CHERLENE: Shane...!
545
00:12:26,404 --> 00:12:28,538
(Caldéron screaming)
546
00:12:28,540 --> 00:12:29,405
(tiger roars)
547
00:12:29,407 --> 00:12:31,474
(scream stops abruptly)
548
00:12:32,576 --> 00:12:33,910
ARCHER: Shane?
549
00:12:33,912 --> 00:12:36,312
(tiger snuffles)
550
00:12:39,650 --> 00:12:42,218
(low, contented growl)
551
00:12:43,220 --> 00:12:44,220
CHERLENE: Well, we should've
552
00:12:44,222 --> 00:12:45,688
guessed that was gonna happen.
553
00:12:45,690 --> 00:12:47,590
(chuckling)
554
00:12:47,592 --> 00:12:49,892
ARCHER: W... we should've?
555
00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:51,494
CHERLENE: Well, or at least
556
00:12:51,496 --> 00:12:52,595
could've.
557
00:12:52,597 --> 00:12:54,030
I mean...
558
00:12:54,032 --> 00:12:55,364
ARCHER: Yeah, I-I-I guess,
559
00:12:55,366 --> 00:12:57,033
uh... I guess a leopard can't
560
00:12:57,035 --> 00:12:58,534
change his spots.
561
00:12:58,536 --> 00:13:00,203
CHERLENE: Uh... I don't know
562
00:13:00,205 --> 00:13:02,038
that much about leopards.
563
00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:03,072
ARCHER: That was actually
564
00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:05,341
a proverb.
565
00:13:05,343 --> 00:13:07,076
CHERLENE: That was actually a
566
00:13:07,078 --> 00:13:09,645
tiger.
567
00:13:14,184 --> 00:13:15,084
SEXY ROBOT VOICE: Minutes to
568
00:13:15,086 --> 00:13:16,385
launch: 180.
569
00:13:16,387 --> 00:13:17,353
KRIEGER: Huh.
570
00:13:17,355 --> 00:13:18,521
That is a lot longer than I
571
00:13:18,523 --> 00:13:21,090
thought it would be.
572
00:13:25,629 --> 00:13:26,629
ARCHER: Okay, when we get to
573
00:13:26,631 --> 00:13:28,030
rebel HQ, they might be
574
00:13:28,032 --> 00:13:29,031
aggressive at first, but...
575
00:13:29,033 --> 00:13:30,032
CHERLENE: They wouldn't if we
576
00:13:30,034 --> 00:13:31,200
had a damn tiger.
577
00:13:31,202 --> 00:13:32,201
(Archer sighs)
578
00:13:32,203 --> 00:13:33,069
ARCHER: No.
579
00:13:33,071 --> 00:13:35,204
We're-we're not going back.
580
00:13:35,206 --> 00:13:37,039
Unless...
581
00:13:37,041 --> 00:13:38,407
No.
582
00:13:38,409 --> 00:13:39,408
CHERLENE: What if...
583
00:13:39,410 --> 00:13:40,943
ARCHER: He had his chance!
584
00:13:40,945 --> 00:13:41,944
JULIANA: A what?
585
00:13:41,946 --> 00:13:42,945
CYRIL: A charivari.
586
00:13:42,947 --> 00:13:44,213
Also called a shivaree?
587
00:13:44,215 --> 00:13:45,214
You know, it's that thing where
588
00:13:45,216 --> 00:13:46,249
everybody bangs pots and pans
589
00:13:46,251 --> 00:13:47,583
outside our room as we...
590
00:13:47,585 --> 00:13:48,718
consummate.
591
00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:49,719
(chuckles)
592
00:13:49,721 --> 00:13:51,120
JULIANA: Oh... n-no.
593
00:13:51,122 --> 00:13:52,121
We're not doing that.
594
00:13:52,123 --> 00:13:53,156
LANA: Ha-ha!
595
00:13:53,158 --> 00:13:54,056
Ow!
596
00:13:54,058 --> 00:13:55,224
Ray, my feet are already killing
597
00:13:55,226 --> 00:13:56,259
me.
598
00:13:56,261 --> 00:13:57,126
RAY: Sorry.
599
00:13:57,128 --> 00:13:58,094
MALORY: He's probably not
600
00:13:58,096 --> 00:13:58,995
used to leading.
601
00:13:58,997 --> 00:13:59,996
RAY: You know...
602
00:13:59,998 --> 00:14:00,897
MALORY: You, on the other
603
00:14:00,899 --> 00:14:03,099
hand... lead away.
604
00:14:03,101 --> 00:14:04,267
PAM: Mind if I cut in?
605
00:14:04,269 --> 00:14:05,134
COMANDANTE: No.
606
00:14:05,136 --> 00:14:06,002
MALORY: Yes!
607
00:14:06,004 --> 00:14:07,003
PAM: Screw you guys.
608
00:14:07,005 --> 00:14:08,004
Hey, Krieger!
609
00:14:08,006 --> 00:14:08,971
KRIEGER: What the hell is
610
00:14:08,973 --> 00:14:09,639
going on?
611
00:14:09,641 --> 00:14:10,506
PAM: Cyril's the new
612
00:14:10,508 --> 00:14:11,340
dictator...
613
00:14:11,342 --> 00:14:12,241
CYRIL: President.
614
00:14:12,243 --> 00:14:13,176
PAM: Shut up, and he just
615
00:14:13,178 --> 00:14:14,110
married crazy tits, and I need
616
00:14:14,112 --> 00:14:14,977
a dance partner.
617
00:14:14,979 --> 00:14:16,412
So nobody noticed that I've
618
00:14:16,414 --> 00:14:17,313
been missing for three weeks?
619
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:18,014
RAY: Um...
620
00:14:18,016 --> 00:14:19,348
MALORY: Well, I certainly
621
00:14:19,350 --> 00:14:20,082
didn't.
622
00:14:20,084 --> 00:14:21,017
PAM: We figured the vampires
623
00:14:21,019 --> 00:14:22,251
MALORY: The what?
624
00:14:22,253 --> 00:14:22,985
LANA: Wait, what?
625
00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:23,986
KRIEGER (sighs): They're not
626
00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:25,521
vampires, they're my clones.
627
00:14:25,523 --> 00:14:27,490
Or I'm their clone, or...
628
00:14:27,492 --> 00:14:29,091
MALORY: Oh, please, you and
629
00:14:29,093 --> 00:14:30,259
your clone nonsense, it's all
630
00:14:30,261 --> 00:14:31,527
a bunch of...
631
00:14:31,529 --> 00:14:33,362
LANA: Holy shit.
632
00:14:33,364 --> 00:14:34,964
CYRIL: Why was I not informed
633
00:14:34,966 --> 00:14:36,432
of this, Krieger?
634
00:14:36,434 --> 00:14:38,134
PAM: If he even is Krieger!
635
00:14:38,136 --> 00:14:39,001
CYRIL: Huh?
636
00:14:39,003 --> 00:14:40,336
PAM: The real Krieger could
637
00:14:40,338 --> 00:14:41,370
be down there!
638
00:14:41,372 --> 00:14:42,305
KRIEGER: Oh, for... that is
639
00:14:42,307 --> 00:14:43,172
just...
640
00:14:43,174 --> 00:14:44,140
I won't even dignify that with
641
00:14:44,142 --> 00:14:45,174
a response.
642
00:14:45,176 --> 00:14:47,610
Uh, uh... (snapping fingers)
643
00:14:47,612 --> 00:14:48,644
LANA: Pam?
644
00:14:48,646 --> 00:14:49,512
KRIEGER: Pam!
645
00:14:49,514 --> 00:14:50,346
PAM: Uh-huh.
646
00:14:50,348 --> 00:14:51,280
KRIEGER: I've got a
647
00:14:51,282 --> 00:14:52,281
concussion.
648
00:14:52,283 --> 00:14:53,516
And this regular tie means
649
00:14:53,518 --> 00:14:54,684
nothing, I don't like bow ties
650
00:14:54,686 --> 00:14:55,985
so I switched.
651
00:14:55,987 --> 00:14:56,652
LANA: Well, you certainly
652
00:14:56,654 --> 00:14:57,520
sound concussed.
653
00:14:57,522 --> 00:14:58,354
PAM: He sounds like a
654
00:14:58,356 --> 00:14:59,222
vampire!
655
00:14:59,224 --> 00:15:00,189
I say we tie him up and let the
656
00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:01,324
sun sort it out!
657
00:15:01,326 --> 00:15:02,191
LANA: You need to hush.
658
00:15:02,193 --> 00:15:03,125
SEXY ROBOT VOICE: Minutes to
659
00:15:03,127 --> 00:15:04,660
launch: 150.
660
00:15:04,662 --> 00:15:05,528
MALORY: What is that?
661
00:15:05,530 --> 00:15:06,362
PAM: What is going on?
662
00:15:06,364 --> 00:15:07,363
CYRIL: Tell me that robot's
663
00:15:07,365 --> 00:15:08,331
not talking about launching this
664
00:15:08,333 --> 00:15:09,198
rocket, Krieger.
665
00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:10,399
PAM: Or should we say
666
00:15:10,401 --> 00:15:11,400
Count Krieg...
667
00:15:11,402 --> 00:15:12,335
Ow! Ow!
668
00:15:12,337 --> 00:15:14,036
Ow, cut it out! Ow!
669
00:15:14,038 --> 00:15:15,905
Goddamn it! Ow!
670
00:15:15,907 --> 00:15:16,973
LANA: Thank you.
671
00:15:16,975 --> 00:15:17,974
PAM: Vampire lovers.
672
00:15:17,976 --> 00:15:18,975
KRIEGER: Yeah, so, here's
673
00:15:18,977 --> 00:15:20,042
the thing...
674
00:15:20,044 --> 00:15:20,710
ARCHER: This is it, rebel
675
00:15:20,712 --> 00:15:21,978
headquarters.
676
00:15:21,980 --> 00:15:23,546
Now, remember, let me do the
677
00:15:23,548 --> 00:15:24,580
talking.
678
00:15:24,582 --> 00:15:25,481
CHERLENE: Got it.
679
00:15:25,483 --> 00:15:26,349
ARCHER: I'm serious.
680
00:15:26,351 --> 00:15:27,183
CHERLENE: I got it.
681
00:15:27,185 --> 00:15:28,050
ARCHER: Look at me.
682
00:15:28,052 --> 00:15:28,985
CHERLENE: I got it!
683
00:15:28,987 --> 00:15:30,052
Jesus!
684
00:15:30,054 --> 00:15:31,087
ARCHER: Okay.
685
00:15:31,089 --> 00:15:32,221
Then here we go.
686
00:15:32,223 --> 00:15:35,524
(rebels shouting in Spanish)
687
00:15:35,526 --> 00:15:36,993
REBEL SOLDIER: Pinche cabrón!
688
00:15:36,995 --> 00:15:37,660
CHERLENE: Ow!
689
00:15:37,662 --> 00:15:38,527
ARCHER: Goddamn it!
690
00:15:38,529 --> 00:15:40,029
You said you'd let me do the...
691
00:15:40,031 --> 00:15:41,030
(grunts)
692
00:15:41,032 --> 00:15:42,598
(Cherlene laughing)
693
00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:43,666
REBEL SOLDIER 2: ¡Espere,
694
00:15:43,668 --> 00:15:44,533
espere!
695
00:15:44,535 --> 00:15:45,368
¡Mira, mira!
696
00:15:45,370 --> 00:15:46,535
Es la cantante!
697
00:15:46,537 --> 00:15:47,603
CHERLENE: ♪ It's all about me
698
00:15:47,605 --> 00:15:48,437
this time... ♪
699
00:15:48,439 --> 00:15:50,239
Aw...
700
00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:51,207
MALORY: So.
701
00:15:51,209 --> 00:15:52,942
You're saying this gigantic
702
00:15:52,944 --> 00:15:54,410
rocket is not only full of
703
00:15:54,412 --> 00:15:56,512
deadly nerve gas, but also aimed
704
00:15:56,514 --> 00:15:58,114
God knows where?
705
00:15:58,116 --> 00:15:59,215
KRIEGER: Well, that statement
706
00:15:59,217 --> 00:16:00,449
presupposes the existence of
707
00:16:00,451 --> 00:16:01,350
God, but...
708
00:16:01,352 --> 00:16:02,285
MALORY: Krieger, I am about
709
00:16:02,287 --> 00:16:03,552
two seconds away from telling
710
00:16:03,554 --> 00:16:05,588
Pam to get a wooden stake.
711
00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,023
PAM: Yay!
712
00:16:07,025 --> 00:16:08,524
KRIEGER: I'm not a vampire!
713
00:16:08,526 --> 00:16:09,525
MALORY: Doesn't matter to
714
00:16:09,527 --> 00:16:10,526
the stake.
715
00:16:10,528 --> 00:16:11,394
KRIEGER: Then yes!
716
00:16:11,396 --> 00:16:12,395
It's full of nerve gas, and I
717
00:16:12,397 --> 00:16:13,396
don't know where it's aimed!
718
00:16:13,398 --> 00:16:14,263
LANA: What?
719
00:16:14,265 --> 00:16:15,264
What's the range on this thing?
720
00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:16,265
KRIEGER: I don't know, 2,000
721
00:16:16,267 --> 00:16:17,133
miles?
722
00:16:17,135 --> 00:16:18,034
(Malory gasps)
723
00:16:18,036 --> 00:16:18,901
MALORY: How far away is the
724
00:16:18,903 --> 00:16:19,969
Upper East Side?
725
00:16:19,971 --> 00:16:20,703
KRIEGER: I don't know,
726
00:16:20,705 --> 00:16:22,471
1,980-something miles?
727
00:16:22,473 --> 00:16:23,472
(Malory screams)
728
00:16:23,474 --> 00:16:24,373
CYRIL: Okay, this is a
729
00:16:24,375 --> 00:16:25,441
presidential order from the
730
00:16:25,443 --> 00:16:26,542
president.
731
00:16:26,544 --> 00:16:27,543
Shut it down!
732
00:16:27,545 --> 00:16:28,411
KRIEGER: I can't!
733
00:16:28,413 --> 00:16:30,046
PAM: Can't, or won't?
734
00:16:30,048 --> 00:16:31,047
KRIEGER: Can't!
735
00:16:31,049 --> 00:16:31,714
PAM: Oh.
736
00:16:31,716 --> 00:16:32,982
I didn't hear you.
737
00:16:32,984 --> 00:16:33,716
LANA: Ray, can you override
738
00:16:33,718 --> 00:16:35,117
the launch sequence?
739
00:16:35,119 --> 00:16:36,118
RAY: Um...
740
00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:36,986
SEXY ROBOT VOICE: Launch
741
00:16:36,988 --> 00:16:37,720
sequence accelerated.
742
00:16:37,722 --> 00:16:38,554
RAY: No.
743
00:16:38,556 --> 00:16:39,322
(all exclaiming)
744
00:16:39,324 --> 00:16:40,423
MALORY: Oh, for God's sake.
745
00:16:40,425 --> 00:16:41,390
SEXY ROBOT VOICE: Minutes to
746
00:16:41,392 --> 00:16:42,391
launch: 90.
747
00:16:42,393 --> 00:16:43,559
LANA: Cyril...
748
00:16:43,561 --> 00:16:44,593
CYRIL: Uh, it's actually
749
00:16:44,595 --> 00:16:46,329
Señor Presidente, but...
750
00:16:46,331 --> 00:16:47,964
LANA: Shh, hush.
751
00:16:47,966 --> 00:16:50,166
Now I know you've had a fun time
752
00:16:50,168 --> 00:16:52,335
as dictator, and we all enjoyed
753
00:16:52,337 --> 00:16:54,003
this little break from him,
754
00:16:54,005 --> 00:16:56,138
but Cyril... and if you tell him
755
00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:57,340
I said this, I'll break your
756
00:16:57,342 --> 00:17:01,677
frickin' arms... it's... ugh...
757
00:17:01,679 --> 00:17:03,279
Archer time.
758
00:17:03,281 --> 00:17:05,247
CYRIL: Wha...?
759
00:17:05,249 --> 00:17:06,682
Oh, all right.
760
00:17:06,684 --> 00:17:08,517
LANA: Krieger, I assume the
761
00:17:08,519 --> 00:17:09,352
whatever...
762
00:17:09,354 --> 00:17:10,353
PAM: Doppelkriegers.
763
00:17:10,355 --> 00:17:11,320
LANA: I assume they had a
764
00:17:11,322 --> 00:17:12,621
lab, so take Ray and see if you
765
00:17:12,623 --> 00:17:13,622
can find some info on how to
766
00:17:13,624 --> 00:17:15,257
shut this damn thing down.
767
00:17:15,259 --> 00:17:16,459
We'll go get Archer.
768
00:17:16,461 --> 00:17:17,526
PAM: Ooh, and Cherlene!
769
00:17:17,528 --> 00:17:19,662
LANA: Ooh, and no.
770
00:17:19,664 --> 00:17:21,964
Because she isn't here.
771
00:17:21,966 --> 00:17:22,665
CYRIL: Oh!
772
00:17:22,667 --> 00:17:24,000
Damn it, Archer!
773
00:17:24,002 --> 00:17:25,034
Damn you!
774
00:17:25,036 --> 00:17:26,002
You can't even let me pretend to
775
00:17:26,004 --> 00:17:27,203
be magnanimous while inwardly
776
00:17:27,205 --> 00:17:28,270
gloating!
777
00:17:28,272 --> 00:17:29,138
MALORY: Oh, shut up.
778
00:17:29,140 --> 00:17:30,439
What does the note say?
779
00:17:30,441 --> 00:17:33,009
LANA (reading):
780
00:17:37,447 --> 00:17:39,048
So, airport?
781
00:17:39,050 --> 00:17:40,116
PAM: But the note says not...
782
00:17:40,118 --> 00:17:41,117
(mumbling)
783
00:17:41,119 --> 00:17:41,984
CYRIL: Well, I guess that
784
00:17:41,986 --> 00:17:42,685
settles that!
785
00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:43,686
I mean, it's not like we can
786
00:17:43,688 --> 00:17:45,054
just waltz into enemy territory
787
00:17:45,056 --> 00:17:46,355
and...
788
00:17:46,357 --> 00:17:48,024
Well, I certainly can't.
789
00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:49,291
LANA: Can't, or...
790
00:17:49,293 --> 00:17:50,993
CYRIL: Both, either, all.
791
00:17:50,995 --> 00:17:52,661
They'd shoot me on sight, Lana.
792
00:17:52,663 --> 00:17:53,662
And if you want Archer so damn
793
00:17:53,664 --> 00:17:55,464
bad, you can go get him your...
794
00:17:55,466 --> 00:17:58,034
(tires squealing)
795
00:18:00,537 --> 00:18:01,537
Huh.
796
00:18:01,539 --> 00:18:02,571
I didn't think she'd actually
797
00:18:02,573 --> 00:18:03,472
do it.
798
00:18:03,474 --> 00:18:04,540
MALORY: Then you're an idiot.
799
00:18:04,542 --> 00:18:07,643
CYRIL: Oh, I'm the idiot?
800
00:18:07,645 --> 00:18:09,645
MALORY: Yes.
801
00:18:09,647 --> 00:18:10,513
(Archer grunts)
802
00:18:10,515 --> 00:18:11,514
ARCHER: What the...?
803
00:18:11,516 --> 00:18:12,515
Holly?
804
00:18:12,517 --> 00:18:13,516
HOLLY: Archer?
805
00:18:13,518 --> 00:18:14,517
SLATER: Rando?
806
00:18:14,519 --> 00:18:15,518
ARCHER: Slater?
807
00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:16,886
HOLLY: Who the hell is Rando?
808
00:18:16,888 --> 00:18:17,653
SLATER: Him!
809
00:18:17,655 --> 00:18:18,521
HOLLY: That's Sterling
810
00:18:18,523 --> 00:18:19,388
Archer!
811
00:18:19,390 --> 00:18:20,389
CHERLENE (loudly): A-hem!
812
00:18:20,391 --> 00:18:22,425
And I am Cherlene?
813
00:18:22,427 --> 00:18:25,428
The Queen of Outlaw Country?
814
00:18:25,430 --> 00:18:26,529
SLATER: What the hell are you
815
00:18:26,531 --> 00:18:27,530
doing here?
816
00:18:27,532 --> 00:18:28,531
ARCHER: What the hell are you
817
00:18:28,533 --> 00:18:29,365
doing here?
818
00:18:29,367 --> 00:18:30,266
HOLLY: I could ask you the
819
00:18:30,268 --> 00:18:31,167
same question.
820
00:18:31,169 --> 00:18:32,234
I am asking you the same
821
00:18:32,236 --> 00:18:33,102
question!
822
00:18:33,104 --> 00:18:34,036
ARCHER: We came to join the
823
00:18:34,038 --> 00:18:34,703
rebels.
824
00:18:34,705 --> 00:18:35,538
SLATER: What?
825
00:18:35,540 --> 00:18:36,539
ARCHER: What's the FBI doing
826
00:18:36,541 --> 00:18:37,606
in San Marcos?
827
00:18:37,608 --> 00:18:39,208
With a cocaine smuggler?
828
00:18:39,210 --> 00:18:40,209
(Holly sighs)
829
00:18:40,211 --> 00:18:41,610
HOLLY: I'm not FBI, and he's
830
00:18:41,612 --> 00:18:42,678
not a...
831
00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:43,946
SLATER: Well, technically,
832
00:18:43,948 --> 00:18:45,014
I am, but...
833
00:18:45,016 --> 00:18:46,182
HOLLY: We're both CIA.
834
00:18:46,184 --> 00:18:47,283
ARCHER: What?!
835
00:18:47,285 --> 00:18:48,451
CHERLENE (whispering): C...
836
00:18:48,453 --> 00:18:49,952
I... A.
837
00:18:49,954 --> 00:18:50,686
SLATER: And we're also
838
00:18:50,688 --> 00:18:51,687
the rebels.
839
00:18:51,689 --> 00:18:53,389
HOLLY: And you are in a mundo
840
00:18:53,391 --> 00:18:54,623
of caca.
841
00:18:54,625 --> 00:18:55,524
LANA: Okay!
842
00:18:55,526 --> 00:18:58,094
Listen, stop, listen to me!
843
00:18:58,096 --> 00:18:59,128
ARCHER: Lana?!
844
00:18:59,130 --> 00:19:00,062
LANA: Holly?
845
00:19:00,064 --> 00:19:01,063
What's the FBI doing...
846
00:19:01,065 --> 00:19:01,931
ARCHER: These dickheads
847
00:19:01,933 --> 00:19:04,366
aren't FBI, Lana, they're CIA!
848
00:19:04,368 --> 00:19:06,936
And also the rebels!
849
00:19:09,539 --> 00:19:10,940
Huh.
850
00:19:10,942 --> 00:19:12,108
Thought that would get more of
851
00:19:12,110 --> 00:19:13,142
a reaction.
852
00:19:13,144 --> 00:19:15,377
LANA: Yeah, no, that is,
853
00:19:15,379 --> 00:19:16,912
um... news, uh...
854
00:19:16,914 --> 00:19:20,483
but my water just broke, so...