1 00:00:01,418 --> 00:00:03,795 MARY ALICE: Previously on Desperate Housewives. 2 00:00:03,837 --> 00:00:05,714 Orson's secret came out. 3 00:00:05,756 --> 00:00:08,383 So you don't know that your husband tried to kill Mike? 4 00:00:08,467 --> 00:00:10,761 MARY ALICE: And Bree couldn't forgive him. 5 00:00:13,263 --> 00:00:18,227 Lynette's stepdaughter Kayla never adjusted to being part of their family. 6 00:00:18,310 --> 00:00:21,355 But I'm never gonna love her, and you can't make me. 7 00:00:21,438 --> 00:00:24,858 MARY ALICE: And Dylan reconnected with her real father. 8 00:00:24,942 --> 00:00:28,779 I'd like to have a relationship with you. But if your mom is still scared of me, 9 00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:30,822 I don't wanna upset her again. 10 00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:32,908 I don't have to tell her. 11 00:00:39,122 --> 00:00:41,667 MARY ALICE: It happens in every marriage. 12 00:00:42,793 --> 00:00:45,754 Couples accumulate lovely things, 13 00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:49,424 things that make a house a home. 14 00:00:50,968 --> 00:00:55,138 But when the home is broken, these things must be divided. 15 00:00:56,306 --> 00:00:58,517 The most dignified way to do this 16 00:00:58,559 --> 00:01:02,896 is for each spouse to keep what is most important to them. 17 00:01:03,897 --> 00:01:07,818 And Bree and Orson Hodge were nothing 18 00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:09,778 if not dignified. 19 00:01:10,195 --> 00:01:12,698 I assume you'll want the pewter cat. 20 00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:15,033 That was my gift to you. 21 00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:19,079 You adored it, as I recall. That's why I'm giving you the choice. 22 00:01:22,833 --> 00:01:25,002 And what about that Hummel from your aunt? 23 00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:27,754 It's ugly as sin, but she insists that it's valuable. 24 00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:29,214 You keep it. 25 00:01:29,423 --> 00:01:33,093 Keep everything. There's only one thing in this house that I want. 26 00:01:33,177 --> 00:01:35,387 I know, but I'm the one thing you can't have. 27 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:38,056 Please. You have to forgive me. 28 00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:42,060 Orson, every wife understands that her husband will make a few mistakes. 29 00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:45,063 Forgotten anniversary, the occasional harsh word. 30 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:46,732 But we all have to draw the line somewhere. 31 00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:50,402 And I'm drawing mine at the attempted murder of my best friend's husband. 32 00:01:50,611 --> 00:01:53,238 Bree, if I could open up my heart and show you 33 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:55,908 how sorry I am, I would, but I can't. 34 00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:58,702 There must be something else I could do. 35 00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:05,083 There is one thing. 36 00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:06,418 Name it. 37 00:02:07,544 --> 00:02:09,838 Turn yourself in to the police. 38 00:02:10,214 --> 00:02:14,051 But the statute of limitations hasn't run out. They would arrest me. 39 00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:15,761 And you'd probably go to prison. 40 00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:17,387 Yes. I could go away for years. 41 00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:20,224 Exactly. And if you could muster that kind of moral courage, 42 00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:22,434 I think I could forgive you. 43 00:02:24,394 --> 00:02:27,940 Oh, come on. I promise I'll wait for you. 44 00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:34,613 Bree. I can't go to prison. 45 00:02:38,325 --> 00:02:39,409 Very well. 46 00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:46,667 So do you want the cat or not? 47 00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:48,335 MARY ALICE: In any separation, 48 00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:51,505 it's only fair that each spouse get to keep 49 00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:53,924 what is most important to them. 50 00:02:56,760 --> 00:03:00,222 That's how Bree Hodge got to keep her pewter cat 51 00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:07,604 and Orson Hodge got to hold on to his freedom. 52 00:03:19,783 --> 00:03:23,787 MARY ALICE: The suburbs are flush with a certain kind of fool. 53 00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:28,876 You know the type, the man who opens his door to total strangers, 54 00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:32,713 the woman who never uses her latch. 55 00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:38,760 It never occurs to them that letting someone into their home 56 00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:43,390 means letting them into their lives. 57 00:03:43,891 --> 00:03:46,643 Hi. I'm Ellie. I understand you got a room to rent. 58 00:03:46,727 --> 00:03:48,353 Yeah. Come on in. 59 00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:52,733 So because of my husband's disability, our financial situation has changed. 60 00:03:53,066 --> 00:03:54,234 And we have this big house. 61 00:03:54,318 --> 00:03:56,695 Well, it's an amazing place, and I love the room. 62 00:03:56,737 --> 00:03:58,488 I can't believe it's still available. 63 00:03:58,572 --> 00:04:00,073 Well, you know... 64 00:04:01,909 --> 00:04:03,952 Anyhow, you have a great credit score... 65 00:04:03,994 --> 00:04:06,246 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What was that? 66 00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:07,748 What was what? 67 00:04:07,831 --> 00:04:10,584 Ellie, did she just give me a dirty look? 68 00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:11,919 Uh... 69 00:04:12,669 --> 00:04:14,421 Yeah, I thought so. 70 00:04:15,923 --> 00:04:17,132 I'm sorry, Ellie. 71 00:04:17,174 --> 00:04:19,968 There's been some tension between my husband and me. 72 00:04:20,010 --> 00:04:22,387 See, the truth is, we could've had the room rented by now 73 00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:24,598 if my husband wasn't so paranoid. 74 00:04:24,681 --> 00:04:27,434 Why? Because I wouldn't let the Swedish bodybuilder move in? 75 00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:29,019 You're as blind as a fruit bat. 76 00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:30,521 How would you know if he's a bodybuilder? 77 00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:34,358 I brushed up against him. I felt his bicep. It was huge. 78 00:04:34,525 --> 00:04:36,026 That wasn't his bicep. 79 00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,779 Why do you think he rushed out of here? 80 00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:43,033 Okay, I normally dig this sort of interpersonal stuff, 81 00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:45,869 but I have a class in 20. So, back to me? 82 00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:50,332 You're right, Ellie. My husband was totally inappropriate. 83 00:04:50,374 --> 00:04:52,042 So, a class? Are you a teacher? 84 00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:55,838 Actually, I'm an art student. My life was working pretty well, 85 00:04:55,879 --> 00:05:00,843 and so I decided to junk it and learn how to paint fruit. It's stupid, right? 86 00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:03,011 No, it's gutsy. 87 00:05:04,179 --> 00:05:06,223 Well, we like you, Ellie. 88 00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:09,852 And if you have first and last month's rent, we'd like you even more. 89 00:05:09,893 --> 00:05:14,189 Fantastic. I just hit the bank. So, do you mind cash? 90 00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:17,526 Oh, no, I love cash. Cash and I go way back. 91 00:05:20,112 --> 00:05:23,031 So are you okay with this, or do you need to grope her, too? 92 00:05:23,073 --> 00:05:25,617 So that really wasn't the guy's arm? 93 00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:27,661 It had an elbow. 94 00:05:31,165 --> 00:05:34,960 Is this the clean pile? 'Cause I'm not seeing it. 95 00:05:35,002 --> 00:05:39,339 You know what? Do them all again. This time, use a little elbow grease. 96 00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:42,926 How are they doing? 97 00:05:43,010 --> 00:05:45,304 They are not suffering enough for my taste. 98 00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:48,390 Are you sure that washing dishes is the right punishment? 99 00:05:48,432 --> 00:05:51,727 Well, gee, I'm kind of at a loss here, Tom. Dr Spock didn't have a chapter 100 00:05:51,768 --> 00:05:54,021 on how to punish your kids for burning down a building. 101 00:05:54,104 --> 00:05:57,274 I just don't feel like we're handling this right. 102 00:05:57,691 --> 00:06:00,360 Maybe we should take them to therapy. 103 00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:04,531 Tom, they're not serial killers. They're two little boys 104 00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:06,450 who were afraid their parents were breaking up. 105 00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:08,160 - But still... - No. 106 00:06:08,452 --> 00:06:09,828 We can handle this in-house. 107 00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:12,539 We can make sure they never do anything like this again. 108 00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:16,126 Fine, we'll try it your way. 109 00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:21,089 But this next month is gonna be like boot camp for these guys. 110 00:06:21,131 --> 00:06:23,509 They're going to be cleaning out the gutters, 111 00:06:23,550 --> 00:06:25,802 taking out the trash, mowing the lawns. 112 00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:27,012 Wait a second. Those are your chores. 113 00:06:27,054 --> 00:06:29,848 No time to talk. Dinner shift's starting. 114 00:06:32,809 --> 00:06:34,811 Okay, this is the place. 115 00:06:35,312 --> 00:06:37,022 Here, let me throw that away for you. 116 00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:39,316 No. I'm not finished with it. 117 00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:41,735 It's a Lamaze class. I guarantee you 118 00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:45,531 I will not be the only woman in there holding a chimichanga. 119 00:06:46,657 --> 00:06:48,492 Wow, it's all couples. 120 00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:51,537 Wish Mike didn't have that rehab thing tonight. 121 00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:53,622 Do you want me to stay? I can skip the movie. 122 00:06:53,664 --> 00:06:56,124 Oh, no. That's okay. I'll be fine. 123 00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:58,335 Okay. Have fun. 124 00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:06,718 (SIGHS) 125 00:07:12,516 --> 00:07:14,893 Quit eyeing it. I ain't sharing. 126 00:07:17,521 --> 00:07:19,189 Okay. Don't talk. Just listen. 127 00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:21,525 Remember last year when I brought up Dad's new girlfriend and you said 128 00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:22,734 you never wanted to hear another word 129 00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:23,902 about one of his "skanks" again? 130 00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:25,070 Yeah? 131 00:07:25,529 --> 00:07:27,406 Okay. Well, I just spotted them in the hallway, 132 00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:30,117 and there's something you should know. 133 00:07:32,286 --> 00:07:34,705 Oh, my God. 134 00:07:35,289 --> 00:07:36,707 Okay, you're all caught up. 135 00:07:36,790 --> 00:07:38,500 He got his skank pregnant and you didn't tell me! 136 00:07:38,542 --> 00:07:41,003 I tried, remember? I said, "Dad and Marisa are about to..." 137 00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:43,005 and then you stopped me, and then you said, "Talk to the hand," 138 00:07:43,046 --> 00:07:44,715 - and I said no one says that any more... - Okay, I get it. 139 00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:47,509 One more thing. They're married. See ya! 140 00:07:47,885 --> 00:07:51,889 Susie Q! What a small world. 141 00:07:52,639 --> 00:07:54,474 Look how fat you are! 142 00:07:55,642 --> 00:08:00,230 - Hello, Karl. - Marisa, this is Susan, my ex-wife. 143 00:08:00,314 --> 00:08:03,901 Hello. It's so nice to finally meet you. 144 00:08:04,735 --> 00:08:07,738 Honey, I'm gonna go sign us in and get us a couple mats. 145 00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:08,864 Okay. 146 00:08:11,325 --> 00:08:13,493 Could you believe this? What are the chances 147 00:08:13,577 --> 00:08:16,747 we'd end up having more kids, huh? Especially you! 148 00:08:17,247 --> 00:08:18,582 - What does that mean? - I'm just saying 149 00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:22,211 most eggs your age don't take. Power to you. 150 00:08:22,252 --> 00:08:24,505 Okay, clearly, this is not going to work. 151 00:08:24,588 --> 00:08:27,382 So why don't you take your child bride and find another class? 152 00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:29,176 I know, she's young. 153 00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:31,220 Makes you want to have work done, huh? 154 00:08:31,261 --> 00:08:33,680 Or should I say more work done? 155 00:08:34,097 --> 00:08:36,975 The only work I've had done was getting 185 pounds 156 00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,810 of ugly fat sucked out of my house. 157 00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:43,440 You're jealous. I get it. She's gorgeous, funny, a law professor... 158 00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:47,528 Oh, no, no, no. Those are not the legs of a law professor. 159 00:08:47,611 --> 00:08:50,656 Not that she needs to work. I just made partner at my firm. 160 00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:55,118 Thanks. I keep telling her, "Slow down. If you need something to do, 161 00:08:55,202 --> 00:08:58,455 "why not oversee the remodel of our new ski chalet?" 162 00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:05,254 Well, I'd better get back to Marisa. And by the way, you're dripping. 163 00:09:13,971 --> 00:09:16,682 - Bye, Mom, I'm leaving. - Be home by 10:00. 164 00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,517 10:00? But it's almost 8:00 now. 165 00:09:18,559 --> 00:09:20,894 Yes, and it's also a school night. 166 00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:22,145 (GROANS) 167 00:09:22,229 --> 00:09:24,523 Fine. Introduce me to this boy, 168 00:09:24,606 --> 00:09:27,568 and we'll talk about making your curfew later. 169 00:09:28,193 --> 00:09:29,444 Yeah, maybe some other night. 170 00:09:29,486 --> 00:09:31,780 Sweetie, I'm gonna have to meet him eventually. 171 00:09:31,822 --> 00:09:35,075 It's just, I don't even know if I like him yet. 172 00:09:35,993 --> 00:09:38,203 When I do, you can meet him. 173 00:09:38,996 --> 00:09:40,789 I'll be home by 10:00. 174 00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:43,333 (SIGHS) 175 00:09:45,669 --> 00:09:47,254 - Hey, Dad. - Hey, princess. 176 00:09:47,337 --> 00:09:49,214 Let's go, I'm starving. 177 00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:56,263 Honey, I can't find my nail file. Have you seen it? 178 00:09:56,346 --> 00:09:58,390 Is that some kind of joke? 179 00:09:58,891 --> 00:10:01,727 Oh, right. I keep forgetting you're useless. 180 00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:04,855 I'm gonna see if Ellie has one. 181 00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:09,693 Hey, Ellie, you got a sec? 182 00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:11,278 Be right there! 183 00:10:13,030 --> 00:10:14,448 Hey, what's up? 184 00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:15,699 Hey... 185 00:10:16,158 --> 00:10:19,745 Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were entertaining. 186 00:10:21,246 --> 00:10:23,415 Hi. I'm Gabby Solis. 187 00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:25,000 Hey. 188 00:10:25,709 --> 00:10:27,503 So, what do you need? 189 00:10:27,544 --> 00:10:31,298 Oh, you know what? It can wait. I'll see you in the morning. 190 00:10:37,304 --> 00:10:38,931 Okay, that was weird. 191 00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:40,140 What? 192 00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:42,559 Earlier tonight 193 00:10:42,684 --> 00:10:45,812 I saw a guy coming out of Ellie's room, so I assumed it was her boyfriend. 194 00:10:45,896 --> 00:10:48,857 But just now I caught her in there with another guy. 195 00:10:48,941 --> 00:10:52,110 Okay. So we have two tramps living in our house. 196 00:10:53,111 --> 00:10:55,447 That was for the "useless" comment, wasn't it? 197 00:10:55,489 --> 00:10:56,657 Mmm-hmm. 198 00:10:56,740 --> 00:10:58,367 And it felt good. 199 00:10:59,326 --> 00:11:00,410 (DOOR OPENING) 200 00:11:01,495 --> 00:11:05,040 Oh, it sounds like he's leaving. I hope it's not 'cause of me. 201 00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:08,836 Maybe I should go apologise. 202 00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:15,968 (DOOR CLOSING) 203 00:11:24,518 --> 00:11:26,395 Okay, there may be two tramps in this house, 204 00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:29,106 but only one of them is getting paid. 205 00:11:32,776 --> 00:11:36,321 Hey, Lynette. Ida's cat got out again. You haven't seen him, have you? 206 00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:38,532 No, sorry. I hope you find him. 207 00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:40,868 Well, if he's anything like Ida, he'll wander into my house 208 00:11:40,951 --> 00:11:43,745 drunk the next time Guiding Light is on. 209 00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:48,709 PRESTON: Wait, hold on, I have to fix this. 210 00:11:51,712 --> 00:11:53,380 This is so unfair. 211 00:11:53,714 --> 00:11:55,757 PRESTON: Yeah, I know. I hate her. 212 00:11:55,966 --> 00:11:57,801 PORTER: How come she's not in trouble? 213 00:11:57,885 --> 00:11:59,803 PRESTON: Because we started the fire, you idiot. 214 00:11:59,887 --> 00:12:01,638 So now we have to be punished. 215 00:12:01,722 --> 00:12:03,849 I know, but it was her idea. 216 00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:06,560 Boys? 217 00:12:08,312 --> 00:12:10,397 Who are you talking about? 218 00:12:13,734 --> 00:12:14,818 (DOOR OPENING) 219 00:12:15,569 --> 00:12:16,820 Kayla. 220 00:12:16,987 --> 00:12:18,989 Can I speak to you for a second? 221 00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:20,365 I guess. 222 00:12:21,325 --> 00:12:25,621 I need to ask you something, and I want you to tell me the truth. Okay? 223 00:12:27,998 --> 00:12:31,960 Did you have anything to do with the fire at Rick's restaurant? 224 00:12:32,503 --> 00:12:34,046 Did someone say I did? 225 00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:37,049 I'm looking for a "yes" or "no" answer here. 226 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,302 I didn't start the fire. 227 00:12:40,344 --> 00:12:43,972 No, the twins did, but they say it was your idea. 228 00:12:45,682 --> 00:12:48,685 It was a joke. I didn't think they'd actually do it. 229 00:12:48,769 --> 00:12:49,978 Kayla, 230 00:12:50,771 --> 00:12:54,066 why would you even joke about something like that? 231 00:12:55,442 --> 00:12:59,279 We heard you and Daddy talking about how Rick wanted to take you away. 232 00:12:59,363 --> 00:13:02,366 Porter was so mad. He wanted to blow Rick up. 233 00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:06,161 Preston told him he could use dynamite. I told them that was stupid. 234 00:13:06,203 --> 00:13:08,705 No one has dynamite in their house. 235 00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:12,501 But everyone has matches. 236 00:13:13,877 --> 00:13:15,504 Do you have any idea what you've done? 237 00:13:15,546 --> 00:13:17,172 Someone could've been killed. 238 00:13:17,214 --> 00:13:18,382 But they weren't. 239 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:20,509 But it doesn't matter! 240 00:13:20,634 --> 00:13:24,429 Intentionally setting a fire is a very serious crime. 241 00:13:25,389 --> 00:13:27,224 Don't you get that? 242 00:13:27,724 --> 00:13:28,851 I do. 243 00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:32,437 That's why I think it's good you're punishing the twins. 244 00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:34,523 They're really bad kids, 245 00:13:35,232 --> 00:13:37,192 and they need to learn. 246 00:13:50,497 --> 00:13:52,082 I told you we'd be overdressed. 247 00:13:52,166 --> 00:13:55,252 There's nothing wrong with that. It shows our respect for Lamaze 248 00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:58,172 and, you know, the whole birthing process. 249 00:14:00,507 --> 00:14:02,926 Or it's that your ex-husband's here. 250 00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:06,889 Karl? Is he here? What a freakish... 251 00:14:06,930 --> 00:14:09,683 Don't even bother. Why didn't you just tell me? 252 00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:12,519 Because I knew you'd make us switch to another class. Last time I was here, 253 00:14:12,603 --> 00:14:15,439 Karl kept throwing his perfect life in my face, and I just wanted to 254 00:14:15,522 --> 00:14:18,192 come back here and show him that we were doing well, too. 255 00:14:18,275 --> 00:14:19,818 Hence the sport coat. 256 00:14:19,860 --> 00:14:23,697 "Hence." That's classy. Say a lot of "hence" when we see him. 257 00:14:24,031 --> 00:14:25,782 Susan, I'm not gonna lie about who I am. 258 00:14:25,866 --> 00:14:28,035 I'm not asking you to lie. I'm just saying spin. 259 00:14:28,118 --> 00:14:29,536 Why won't you spin? 260 00:14:29,620 --> 00:14:30,704 I don't know... 261 00:14:30,787 --> 00:14:33,457 Hey, plumber! Somebody clog a toilet? 262 00:14:36,126 --> 00:14:37,252 I'm in. 263 00:14:38,212 --> 00:14:43,300 Hey, guys! Mike, you remember Karl. And this is Karl's wife, Marisa. 264 00:14:43,467 --> 00:14:44,635 Hello. 265 00:14:45,802 --> 00:14:47,012 So how's things going? 266 00:14:47,054 --> 00:14:50,474 You still spending most of your time with your head under a sink? 267 00:14:50,641 --> 00:14:53,977 Actually, I hired a couple guys, and they do all the work. 268 00:14:54,061 --> 00:14:57,689 I just sit back and cash the cheques. Hence the sport coat. 269 00:14:57,731 --> 00:15:01,109 Yeah, you guys look fantastic. I feel like such a slob. 270 00:15:01,151 --> 00:15:02,569 Kind of overdressed, aren't you? 271 00:15:02,653 --> 00:15:05,322 Well, after this we have a big party to go to. 272 00:15:05,322 --> 00:15:08,158 Yeah, our social life is just crazy these days. 273 00:15:08,242 --> 00:15:10,202 Seems like every night we have some fancy party. 274 00:15:10,244 --> 00:15:11,411 It's just bananas! 275 00:15:11,495 --> 00:15:12,538 (LAUGHING) 276 00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:14,164 Why don't you ever take me out? 277 00:15:14,248 --> 00:15:17,668 Hey, at least I didn't ditch you on the first day of Lamaze class. 278 00:15:17,751 --> 00:15:21,213 I didn't ditch Susan. I was getting my 30-day chip. 279 00:15:22,339 --> 00:15:24,550 What, you're like, an alkie? 280 00:15:25,175 --> 00:15:28,053 Drugs, actually. Prescription drugs. 281 00:15:28,178 --> 00:15:31,098 But I went through rehab, and I'm clean now. 282 00:15:32,182 --> 00:15:34,476 Wow. Congratulations. 283 00:15:34,601 --> 00:15:37,980 INSTRUCTOR: Okay, people. Time to get started. Take your seats. 284 00:15:40,691 --> 00:15:44,027 So your hubby's been in rehab. That's just bananas. 285 00:15:49,199 --> 00:15:50,284 Wow. 286 00:15:50,367 --> 00:15:51,451 I know. 287 00:15:51,535 --> 00:15:54,413 Turns out the whole thing was Kayla's idea. 288 00:15:54,705 --> 00:15:58,876 Well, I guess Porter and Preston have a new dish-washing buddy, huh? 289 00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:02,713 No, I think it goes a little further than that. 290 00:16:03,046 --> 00:16:06,758 I think we have a seriously troubled young girl. 291 00:16:07,384 --> 00:16:10,304 She needs professional help. 292 00:16:12,222 --> 00:16:14,099 - Like therapy? - You brought it up before. 293 00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:16,727 And in this case, I really don't think we have a choice. 294 00:16:16,810 --> 00:16:20,814 Interesting. So the boys, who actually physically set the fire, 295 00:16:20,898 --> 00:16:23,942 they don't need therapy. But Kayla, who only talked about it, she does. 296 00:16:23,984 --> 00:16:27,487 You didn't see her. She just sat there playing with her doll, 297 00:16:27,571 --> 00:16:29,781 with this kind of eerie calm. 298 00:16:30,741 --> 00:16:33,619 Oh, she was calm? Yeah, better nip that in the bud. 299 00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:35,329 No, you're missing my point. 300 00:16:35,412 --> 00:16:36,663 No, I get your point! 301 00:16:36,747 --> 00:16:40,626 There are different rules for my kid than there are for yours. 302 00:16:41,585 --> 00:16:43,837 Well, yeah. 303 00:16:44,254 --> 00:16:47,132 Think of what that poor girl has been through. 304 00:16:47,174 --> 00:16:48,967 And on top of that, 305 00:16:50,594 --> 00:16:52,971 her mom was kind of a psycho. 306 00:16:53,847 --> 00:16:57,309 Okay, you're saying that Kayla is a psycho now. 307 00:16:58,268 --> 00:17:01,647 I am just saying apple, tree. 308 00:17:02,773 --> 00:17:04,483 Maybe not so far. 309 00:17:04,691 --> 00:17:08,654 And I'm just saying my daughter is fine. No therapy. 310 00:17:22,960 --> 00:17:24,628 Orson, what are you doing here? 311 00:17:24,711 --> 00:17:28,131 Bree, it's so good to see you. I have been doing some thinking. 312 00:17:28,215 --> 00:17:30,717 Yes, I can smell the thinking on your breath. 313 00:17:30,801 --> 00:17:32,678 Are you insane, driving in this condition? 314 00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:36,348 No, I didn't. I arrived sober, and I drank while I waited. 315 00:17:36,390 --> 00:17:37,850 I am a law-abiding man. 316 00:17:37,891 --> 00:17:40,102 Except for the occasional hit-and-run. 317 00:17:40,143 --> 00:17:43,564 The incident, that's what I'm here to talk about. 318 00:17:43,897 --> 00:17:44,982 (SIGHS) 319 00:17:45,065 --> 00:17:48,694 I am prepared to meet your condition and go to the police. 320 00:17:49,570 --> 00:17:52,030 - You are? - Yes. I have it all figured out. 321 00:17:52,614 --> 00:17:55,951 The key is the sleepwalking. Susan saw it. 322 00:17:56,493 --> 00:17:58,495 We'll find a psychiatrist to testify that 323 00:17:58,579 --> 00:18:01,206 I was sleepwalking when I drove the car. It's brilliant! 324 00:18:01,248 --> 00:18:05,210 No, it's a pathetic fantasy fuelled by cowardice and amaretto sours. 325 00:18:05,252 --> 00:18:07,921 You committed a crime, Orson. Face it. 326 00:18:10,007 --> 00:18:13,135 Bree, I just wanna come home. Please. 327 00:18:15,012 --> 00:18:18,390 Hey, I'm glad you two are patching things up, 328 00:18:18,432 --> 00:18:20,601 but take the make-up sex inside. 329 00:18:20,642 --> 00:18:23,437 Edie, would you do me a favour and take Orson back to his apartment? 330 00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:24,897 I have to let my sitter go home. 331 00:18:24,938 --> 00:18:26,064 Umm... 332 00:18:26,106 --> 00:18:28,108 All right. Hop in. 333 00:18:28,192 --> 00:18:31,111 No, no, please don't make me go back there. 334 00:18:31,862 --> 00:18:35,407 The other divorced men are trying to start a book club. 335 00:18:35,532 --> 00:18:37,326 Oh, for God's sakes. 336 00:18:37,701 --> 00:18:39,912 You can sleep it off on my couch tonight. 337 00:18:39,953 --> 00:18:42,414 Now hitch up your skirt and get in. 338 00:18:42,456 --> 00:18:43,582 Yeah. 339 00:18:47,461 --> 00:18:49,922 There have been men coming out of her room at all hours of the night, 340 00:18:49,963 --> 00:18:52,591 and I saw her counting a wad of cash. 341 00:18:52,841 --> 00:18:57,304 So, long story short, I need your help to get that hooker out of my house. 342 00:18:58,305 --> 00:18:59,973 What do you want us to do? 343 00:19:00,057 --> 00:19:03,185 Well, I've got no solid evidence, and she's got a lease. 344 00:19:03,268 --> 00:19:06,230 So, Bob, I was hoping you could "solicit" 345 00:19:06,313 --> 00:19:08,440 her services. That way I'll have proof. 346 00:19:09,066 --> 00:19:11,193 You do know I'm gay, right? 347 00:19:11,485 --> 00:19:14,321 Exactly. You people are theatrical. 348 00:19:14,404 --> 00:19:18,075 And I need someone I can count on to give a decent performance. 349 00:19:18,116 --> 00:19:19,326 I don't know... 350 00:19:19,409 --> 00:19:20,786 I'll do it. 351 00:19:23,080 --> 00:19:24,206 What? 352 00:19:24,373 --> 00:19:25,916 Well, no offence. 353 00:19:25,999 --> 00:19:29,711 I just think Bob has a better shot at pulling it off. He's a little more... 354 00:19:30,504 --> 00:19:33,674 Butch. I know. You hear that, honey? 355 00:19:33,757 --> 00:19:36,510 Please. The only way you'd be convincing as a straight guy 356 00:19:36,593 --> 00:19:39,638 is if you died and came back as a straight guy. 357 00:19:40,097 --> 00:19:43,892 I'm sorry. Who went to their senior prom with a girl? 358 00:19:43,934 --> 00:19:47,604 Yeah. Suzy Sellers, gay maker. If you're looking for butch, 359 00:19:47,855 --> 00:19:52,025 you should know that I played Tony in West Side Story to rave reviews. 360 00:19:52,109 --> 00:19:55,696 He also made out with Officer Krupke during intermission. 361 00:19:57,489 --> 00:20:01,702 Well, I really don't care who does it. Just get it done. 362 00:20:02,703 --> 00:20:04,830 And don't wear that. 363 00:20:11,628 --> 00:20:15,424 Never watch a C-section film if you had a calzone for lunch. 364 00:20:18,719 --> 00:20:20,387 Everything okay? 365 00:20:21,805 --> 00:20:23,974 Did you have to tell Karl about rehab? 366 00:20:24,057 --> 00:20:25,601 You said I didn't have to lie. 367 00:20:25,642 --> 00:20:27,394 Yeah, but that doesn't mean you have to go 368 00:20:27,477 --> 00:20:29,563 blurting all our deepest, darkest secrets. 369 00:20:29,646 --> 00:20:31,732 It's not dark. It's part of who I am. 370 00:20:31,815 --> 00:20:34,610 Plus, one of the first things they teach you in the programme is it's not healthy 371 00:20:34,651 --> 00:20:37,029 to keep secrets. Hence the honesty. 372 00:20:37,112 --> 00:20:39,281 Oh, enough with the "hence." 373 00:20:39,448 --> 00:20:40,657 (SUSAN SIGHS) 374 00:20:40,741 --> 00:20:42,826 I'm just saying that some things are private, 375 00:20:42,910 --> 00:20:46,955 and I think that you can be honest without being inappropriate. 376 00:20:47,331 --> 00:20:50,834 When I said it, his wife congratulated me. Did you notice that? 377 00:20:50,918 --> 00:20:53,795 And Karl made his happy monkey face. Did you notice that? 378 00:20:53,837 --> 00:20:55,672 You know what, Susan? 379 00:20:55,756 --> 00:21:00,594 This reminds me of the battle I have to fight every day for the rest of my life. 380 00:21:00,969 --> 00:21:02,387 That's what's important to me. 381 00:21:02,429 --> 00:21:05,891 I don't give a rat's ass what your ex-husband thinks. 382 00:21:11,522 --> 00:21:12,648 (TELEPHONE RINGING) 383 00:21:12,689 --> 00:21:14,566 This isn't Dr Kagan's office. 384 00:21:14,650 --> 00:21:16,693 Well, actually, this is a different kind of doctor. 385 00:21:16,777 --> 00:21:19,196 You know, the kind you can talk to. 386 00:21:19,279 --> 00:21:21,365 You brought me to a shrink? 387 00:21:21,615 --> 00:21:23,659 Well, I thought you might like to have a safe place 388 00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:26,161 where you could share your feelings. 389 00:21:26,203 --> 00:21:27,579 You know? 390 00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:31,458 With your mom's death and moving in with us, 391 00:21:31,542 --> 00:21:32,668 you've been through a lot. 392 00:21:32,709 --> 00:21:35,003 That was a long time ago. I'm fine. 393 00:21:35,045 --> 00:21:36,338 Well, good. 394 00:21:36,421 --> 00:21:37,881 But sometimes 395 00:21:38,298 --> 00:21:42,177 when you go through hard things, it changes the way you think. 396 00:21:43,387 --> 00:21:47,349 Maybe we have trouble telling the difference between what's right 397 00:21:47,391 --> 00:21:48,684 and what's wrong. 398 00:21:48,725 --> 00:21:50,143 I don't have any trouble with that. 399 00:21:50,227 --> 00:21:52,145 Actually, you do. That's why you're here. 400 00:21:52,229 --> 00:21:55,065 So let's just wait and talk to the doctor, 401 00:21:55,232 --> 00:21:56,358 okay? 402 00:22:00,571 --> 00:22:01,697 (LYNETTE SIGHS) 403 00:22:05,576 --> 00:22:06,702 You know what, Lynette? 404 00:22:06,785 --> 00:22:10,372 Maybe I should talk to the doctor about right and wrong. 405 00:22:10,747 --> 00:22:13,709 - Good. - Then maybe I should talk to the police. 406 00:22:13,750 --> 00:22:17,796 What? No, sweetie, we don't need to do that. 407 00:22:18,338 --> 00:22:21,091 Really? 'Cause what the twins did is a crime. 408 00:22:21,175 --> 00:22:23,927 I mean, like you said, someone could've been killed. 409 00:22:23,969 --> 00:22:27,598 So, if we don't go to the police, wouldn't that be wrong? 410 00:22:28,807 --> 00:22:30,142 You don't understand... 411 00:22:30,184 --> 00:22:31,351 No, I do. 412 00:22:31,435 --> 00:22:35,147 If I have to talk to the shrink, I have to talk to the cops. 413 00:22:36,607 --> 00:22:37,733 (DOOR OPENS) 414 00:22:38,192 --> 00:22:41,361 Hi, you must be Kayla. I'm all ready for you. 415 00:22:42,738 --> 00:22:45,115 Actually, I think we're okay. 416 00:22:45,616 --> 00:22:49,536 We resolved our problems just sitting in your waiting room. 417 00:22:51,288 --> 00:22:53,957 Boy, you're good. Okay. 418 00:22:54,124 --> 00:22:55,834 So we're gonna go. 419 00:23:03,133 --> 00:23:05,302 Target in place. We're a go. 420 00:23:05,636 --> 00:23:07,262 BOB: He's coming out. 421 00:23:12,809 --> 00:23:14,603 What is he wearing? 422 00:23:16,396 --> 00:23:18,440 He looks like the lost member of Wham! 423 00:23:18,482 --> 00:23:20,776 He thinks the outfit makes him look straight. 424 00:23:20,817 --> 00:23:24,279 Just be thankful I got the toothpick out of his mouth. 425 00:23:26,824 --> 00:23:31,328 Must he put his hand on his hip like that? Butch up, for God's sakes! 426 00:23:33,163 --> 00:23:34,706 ELLIE: What? What do you think I am? 427 00:23:34,748 --> 00:23:35,916 Uh-oh. 428 00:23:37,167 --> 00:23:39,962 Oh, crap! Abort! Abort! 429 00:23:40,671 --> 00:23:41,713 I'm sorry! I'm sorry! 430 00:23:41,755 --> 00:23:44,341 You are a pig, and I'm gonna kick your ass! 431 00:23:44,424 --> 00:23:45,759 Ellie, what are you doing? 432 00:23:45,843 --> 00:23:48,303 Your creepy neighbour, he came over here 433 00:23:48,345 --> 00:23:50,013 and offered me money to sleep with him! 434 00:23:50,097 --> 00:23:51,640 Gabby, tell her! 435 00:23:51,932 --> 00:23:53,392 Tell me what? 436 00:23:55,185 --> 00:23:57,688 He did the same thing to me. Perv! 437 00:23:57,938 --> 00:24:00,983 Hey! That's enough! Gabby, tell her or I will! 438 00:24:02,693 --> 00:24:04,361 What's going on? 439 00:24:05,696 --> 00:24:07,364 Here's the thing. 440 00:24:07,865 --> 00:24:10,033 I thought you were a hooker, 441 00:24:10,117 --> 00:24:13,954 so I had Lee proposition you so I could catch you in the act. 442 00:24:14,621 --> 00:24:19,209 But guess what? You passed the test! Everybody inside for margaritas. 443 00:24:25,299 --> 00:24:30,220 Ellie, wait. I made a mistake! Can we please talk about this? 444 00:24:30,304 --> 00:24:32,890 Dude, you just told your neighbours that I'm a whore! 445 00:24:32,973 --> 00:24:36,226 Look at it from my point of view. You're an attractive woman, 446 00:24:36,310 --> 00:24:39,897 guys are coming and going, I saw you take money from one of them. 447 00:24:39,980 --> 00:24:42,107 What am I supposed to think? 448 00:24:45,736 --> 00:24:48,238 All right, you might as well know. 449 00:24:50,657 --> 00:24:52,159 I do tattoos. 450 00:24:53,243 --> 00:24:54,286 You do what? 451 00:24:54,328 --> 00:24:57,998 See, I've been working downtown, and I have this jerk of a boss 452 00:24:58,081 --> 00:25:00,417 who takes 70% of my money. 453 00:25:01,251 --> 00:25:05,422 So I'm trying to earn enough cash to finally open my own shop. 454 00:25:07,257 --> 00:25:09,593 You've been running a tattoo parlour out of my house? 455 00:25:09,676 --> 00:25:11,678 I know. I'm sorry I lied. 456 00:25:13,597 --> 00:25:14,765 I'll be gone in the morning. 457 00:25:14,848 --> 00:25:16,266 Ellie, wait. 458 00:25:17,017 --> 00:25:18,143 You don't have to go. 459 00:25:18,268 --> 00:25:22,105 Are you sure? Because I have to keep doing my work to pay for school. 460 00:25:22,189 --> 00:25:25,651 Well, I suppose I could look the other way for a few months. 461 00:25:25,859 --> 00:25:29,154 It's the least I could do for thinking you're a whore. 462 00:25:30,614 --> 00:25:31,740 Forgive me? 463 00:25:32,699 --> 00:25:34,034 Of course. 464 00:25:52,886 --> 00:25:54,137 (DOORBELL RINGING) 465 00:25:57,724 --> 00:25:59,268 - Oh, hi! - Hi, Edie. 466 00:25:59,309 --> 00:26:01,311 Thanks again for helping me out last night. 467 00:26:01,395 --> 00:26:02,646 Oh, no problem. 468 00:26:02,729 --> 00:26:05,232 Orson's car is still parked at my house. 469 00:26:05,315 --> 00:26:07,651 Did he mention when he'd be coming back to pick it up? 470 00:26:07,734 --> 00:26:11,321 Well, why don't you ask him yourself? He's in the shower. 471 00:26:12,656 --> 00:26:14,199 He spent the night here? 472 00:26:14,241 --> 00:26:16,785 Apparently, he's not a big fan of Fairview Towers, 473 00:26:16,827 --> 00:26:20,372 and he was so drunk and whiny I just let him ride my couch. 474 00:26:20,414 --> 00:26:23,167 Well, just so you know, in the future, 475 00:26:24,251 --> 00:26:27,713 I'm not comfortable with that. This can't happen again. 476 00:26:28,922 --> 00:26:31,216 Bree, what are you getting at? 477 00:26:32,259 --> 00:26:34,136 Oh, I think you know. 478 00:26:34,678 --> 00:26:38,182 Tell me anyway. Just in case you're not saying I'm a big slut. 479 00:26:38,265 --> 00:26:42,269 Well, come on, Edie, you know, Carlos, Mike, Karl? 480 00:26:42,686 --> 00:26:45,397 You do have a way of picking at other women's leftovers. 481 00:26:45,439 --> 00:26:47,900 First of all, I am not attracted to Orson. 482 00:26:47,941 --> 00:26:50,944 And that would be like having sex with PBS. 483 00:26:51,028 --> 00:26:53,572 And second, just because I don't like your attitude, 484 00:26:53,614 --> 00:26:55,699 I'm gonna let him stay as long as he wants. 485 00:26:55,782 --> 00:26:57,659 - Edie! - Days. Weeks. 486 00:26:57,701 --> 00:26:59,495 Might even let him hang my Christmas lights. 487 00:26:59,536 --> 00:27:02,247 Come on, Edie! Think of our friendship. 488 00:27:08,462 --> 00:27:09,880 How do you expect me to react, Lynette? 489 00:27:09,963 --> 00:27:11,715 You took her to therapy behind my back! 490 00:27:11,798 --> 00:27:13,258 And I wouldn't have done that unless 491 00:27:13,300 --> 00:27:15,511 I thought we had a serious problem. Which we do! 492 00:27:15,552 --> 00:27:17,095 Why, because she threatened you? 493 00:27:17,137 --> 00:27:18,931 Of course she did. You ambushed her! 494 00:27:18,972 --> 00:27:22,100 Tom, it is one thing not to want to admit something's wrong with your kid. 495 00:27:22,142 --> 00:27:23,769 It's another to just bury your head in the sand. 496 00:27:23,810 --> 00:27:24,978 TOM: Who's burying their head in the sand? 497 00:27:25,062 --> 00:27:26,104 LYNETTE: You are! 498 00:27:26,146 --> 00:27:28,565 - There are opportunities that you... - TOM: No! You're distorting reality. 499 00:27:28,649 --> 00:27:29,691 LYNETTE: I'm not! 500 00:27:29,733 --> 00:27:32,361 LYNETTE: What would be my agenda? TOM: You can't pull the crap like this... 501 00:27:47,501 --> 00:27:48,627 Whoa! 502 00:27:48,669 --> 00:27:49,753 What're you doing? 503 00:27:49,837 --> 00:27:52,005 I jumped off the roof. It was awesome. 504 00:27:52,089 --> 00:27:53,257 No way. 505 00:27:53,340 --> 00:27:56,677 Yeah! It was just like a parachute. You wanna try it? 506 00:27:57,427 --> 00:27:59,429 But maybe it won't work. 507 00:28:00,180 --> 00:28:02,140 It will. I just did it. 508 00:28:02,266 --> 00:28:04,434 If you want, I can show you. 509 00:28:05,435 --> 00:28:06,812 Oh, wait, 510 00:28:06,937 --> 00:28:08,605 you're in trouble. 511 00:28:08,689 --> 00:28:10,107 You can't. 512 00:28:12,025 --> 00:28:13,485 Never mind. 513 00:28:21,118 --> 00:28:23,203 - You're burying your head in the sand. - I'm not. It is different. 514 00:28:23,287 --> 00:28:25,122 There's so many opportunities you could see what's going on! 515 00:28:25,205 --> 00:28:26,874 - No, because you're distorting reality! - I am not! 516 00:28:26,957 --> 00:28:28,542 You can't pull crap like this, Lynette. 517 00:28:28,625 --> 00:28:30,169 Either you treat Kayla like she's your own kid... 518 00:28:30,210 --> 00:28:31,295 Come on, I do! 519 00:28:31,378 --> 00:28:32,421 (PRESTON SCREAMS) 520 00:28:32,462 --> 00:28:33,589 PORTER: Mom! 521 00:28:33,630 --> 00:28:34,756 (LYNETTE GROANS) 522 00:28:35,215 --> 00:28:37,176 (PRESTON GROANING) 523 00:28:37,217 --> 00:28:39,970 Oh, my God! Oh, my God, what happened? 524 00:28:40,053 --> 00:28:41,346 PORTER: Is he okay? 525 00:28:41,638 --> 00:28:44,016 Porter, get down off that roof! 526 00:28:44,892 --> 00:28:46,310 LYNETTE: Up, up. PRESTON: It hurts! 527 00:28:46,393 --> 00:28:48,145 We gotta take him to the hospital. 528 00:28:48,228 --> 00:28:51,231 Okay, you stay here. You take care of the kids. I will take him to the hospital. 529 00:28:51,315 --> 00:28:54,026 No! You both go. I got the kids. Go, go! Go, go, go, go. 530 00:28:54,067 --> 00:28:56,528 Thanks, Karen. Come here, buddy. 531 00:28:56,570 --> 00:29:00,657 It's okay, sweetie. You're gonna be just fine. There. 532 00:29:14,421 --> 00:29:15,547 (SUSAN SIGHS) 533 00:29:17,508 --> 00:29:19,968 Hey, Susie. Where's the plumber? 534 00:29:20,344 --> 00:29:24,056 Fishing a wedding ring out of some housewife's grease trap? 535 00:29:24,264 --> 00:29:26,225 He's not feeling well. 536 00:29:26,433 --> 00:29:28,852 I see Marisa isn't here, either. 537 00:29:28,936 --> 00:29:31,605 Yeah, she got stuck at her book signing. 538 00:29:31,855 --> 00:29:36,485 She writes books, like you, only hers are for grown-ups, and they sell. 539 00:29:36,944 --> 00:29:39,738 Okay, Karl, you win! You happy? 540 00:29:40,197 --> 00:29:43,200 Whoa, what's this about? 541 00:29:43,367 --> 00:29:46,286 Just drop the act. You are so loving this. 542 00:29:46,370 --> 00:29:50,791 You ended up with the Miss America with a law degree, and I ended up 543 00:29:50,874 --> 00:29:53,418 with the pill-head plumber. Bravo. 544 00:29:54,461 --> 00:29:56,964 Damn it. Why won't this unroll? 545 00:29:58,799 --> 00:30:01,218 You know, Marisa's not perfect. 546 00:30:01,718 --> 00:30:04,221 We have our problems like anyone else. 547 00:30:04,304 --> 00:30:05,681 Oh, really? 548 00:30:06,390 --> 00:30:09,059 Do you guys live "one day at a time"? 549 00:30:09,142 --> 00:30:12,479 Is your first thought when she's late that maybe she's out using again, 550 00:30:12,563 --> 00:30:14,439 or maybe she's dead? 551 00:30:16,984 --> 00:30:20,362 Just seems like everything is so fragile right now. 552 00:30:22,072 --> 00:30:26,493 Which is not the way you want it to be when you're about to have a baby. 553 00:30:33,250 --> 00:30:37,129 So you're worried you might be having a kid with an unreliable guy. 554 00:30:37,171 --> 00:30:39,631 I get it. You did that once before. 555 00:30:39,673 --> 00:30:42,342 Yeah. That guy was the worst. 556 00:30:43,427 --> 00:30:46,889 Wasn't I, though? I cheated, drank too much, 557 00:30:46,930 --> 00:30:49,308 I made that play for your cousin. 558 00:30:50,100 --> 00:30:53,020 Oh, right, you didn't know about that. That never happened. 559 00:30:53,103 --> 00:30:54,271 Anyway, 560 00:30:55,355 --> 00:30:59,484 I lied about every bit of it. At least Mike's trying to be honest. 561 00:30:59,693 --> 00:31:00,903 I know. 562 00:31:01,778 --> 00:31:03,822 Just wish I could fast-forward through my life 563 00:31:03,864 --> 00:31:06,492 and see that everything ends up okay. 564 00:31:08,118 --> 00:31:11,622 Hey, don't tell the plumber this, but he's a good guy. 565 00:31:12,289 --> 00:31:16,126 I think he's gonna be there for you in a way that I never was. 566 00:31:17,127 --> 00:31:18,545 Thank you. 567 00:31:20,964 --> 00:31:22,424 Which cousin? 568 00:31:23,634 --> 00:31:25,969 Oh, look, a model of the uterus. 569 00:31:28,472 --> 00:31:31,266 He's a big grey cat. So if you could just keep an eye out. 570 00:31:31,308 --> 00:31:32,768 - Of course. - Actually, Karen, 571 00:31:32,809 --> 00:31:35,062 when I'm done here, I could go try to find Toby for you. 572 00:31:35,145 --> 00:31:37,981 Thanks, Bree. I appreciate that. If you do find him, 573 00:31:38,065 --> 00:31:40,984 don't look him in the eye. It angries him up. 574 00:31:44,238 --> 00:31:46,657 That's very nice of you to help her, 575 00:31:46,740 --> 00:31:49,493 and it'll take your mind off of everything with Orson, too. 576 00:31:49,576 --> 00:31:52,412 I hope so. Truth is, I miss him. 577 00:31:52,496 --> 00:31:54,414 And I'll probably let him come home eventually. 578 00:31:54,498 --> 00:31:59,002 I just need to know he understands the gravity of what he did. 579 00:31:59,086 --> 00:32:02,172 Well, I don't know what he did, but be careful. 580 00:32:02,256 --> 00:32:05,634 Some men say they're going to change, and they can't. 581 00:32:07,761 --> 00:32:10,222 Oh, hello, Dylan. You look lovely. 582 00:32:10,264 --> 00:32:13,308 She has a date. With a boy I haven't met yet. 583 00:32:13,851 --> 00:32:15,936 It's just a movie. It's no big deal. 584 00:32:16,019 --> 00:32:19,898 Be that as it may, it's the, what, third time you've gone out? 585 00:32:20,524 --> 00:32:21,650 I don't even know his name. 586 00:32:21,692 --> 00:32:24,403 Mom, I told you, I'm not ready for you to meet him. 587 00:32:24,444 --> 00:32:27,322 When I am, you'll know. Good night, Mrs Hodge. 588 00:32:27,364 --> 00:32:28,490 Good night. 589 00:32:30,784 --> 00:32:34,830 Okay. Back to business. How do you feel about Parker House Rolls? 590 00:32:34,872 --> 00:32:37,166 I mean, personally, I think they're played out. 591 00:32:37,207 --> 00:32:40,669 Actually, Bree, could we pick this up again tomorrow? 592 00:32:41,461 --> 00:32:44,256 Well, of course. Is everything all right? 593 00:32:44,298 --> 00:32:47,384 Oh, yes. I just need to go spy on my daughter. 594 00:32:48,135 --> 00:32:52,806 The key is to keep one car between yours and hers at all times. Have fun! 595 00:32:57,477 --> 00:33:01,231 We should probably get the cheque. I have to be back by 10:00. 596 00:33:02,399 --> 00:33:04,276 We still have time for coffee? 597 00:33:04,318 --> 00:33:07,613 I don't wanna push it. Mom was all over me tonight. 598 00:33:08,489 --> 00:33:10,282 I'm sorry about that. 599 00:33:10,824 --> 00:33:12,576 Whatever. It's fine. 600 00:33:12,659 --> 00:33:14,077 No, it's not. 601 00:33:15,078 --> 00:33:17,831 I can see how hard this whole thing is on you. 602 00:33:17,915 --> 00:33:20,125 Makes me wish we could just 603 00:33:21,251 --> 00:33:23,086 tell her the truth. 604 00:33:24,755 --> 00:33:25,881 I don't know. 605 00:33:25,923 --> 00:33:28,425 Well, it's your choice. 606 00:33:29,510 --> 00:33:32,930 And you're probably right. We've got a good thing going here, 607 00:33:33,013 --> 00:33:34,973 I don't want to ruin it. 608 00:33:36,016 --> 00:33:39,561 But I'll tell you something. If it was only up to me, 609 00:33:41,522 --> 00:33:43,065 I'd come clean. 610 00:33:43,941 --> 00:33:45,275 You would? 611 00:33:45,526 --> 00:33:46,902 Absolutely. 612 00:33:47,194 --> 00:33:50,405 That way I could tell your mom how sorry I am. 613 00:33:50,948 --> 00:33:53,617 And I wouldn't expect her to forgive me, 614 00:33:54,117 --> 00:33:57,412 but I could hope she could at least 615 00:33:59,289 --> 00:34:00,999 see I've changed. 616 00:34:04,461 --> 00:34:07,339 But whatever you wanna do, it's okay by me. 617 00:34:31,905 --> 00:34:33,615 Okay, thank you. 618 00:34:34,908 --> 00:34:39,371 Well, I've got a room at a hotel in Mount Pleasant. I guess I'll get going. 619 00:34:39,913 --> 00:34:43,041 It's late. Why not just go tomorrow? 620 00:34:44,168 --> 00:34:45,752 Well, I feel like I'm imposing. 621 00:34:45,836 --> 00:34:47,087 You are. 622 00:34:48,338 --> 00:34:51,508 But you make a decent martini, so what the hell. 623 00:34:52,509 --> 00:34:56,221 So. You like the Hodge formula, huh? 624 00:34:56,597 --> 00:34:57,723 You see, the secret... 625 00:34:57,764 --> 00:34:59,600 I don't hear shaking. 626 00:35:02,853 --> 00:35:06,190 By the way, did you see Bree when you were coming home? 627 00:35:06,273 --> 00:35:07,357 Oh. 628 00:35:08,108 --> 00:35:10,694 No, I didn't. 629 00:35:10,777 --> 00:35:12,654 I keep thinking she's gonna call me. 630 00:35:12,696 --> 00:35:16,366 Look, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, 631 00:35:16,450 --> 00:35:19,828 but what the heck happened over at Ken and Barbie's Dream House? 632 00:35:19,870 --> 00:35:22,706 I made a mistake, and Bree won't forgive me. 633 00:35:22,873 --> 00:35:25,792 You see, that's the problem with the Brees of this world. 634 00:35:26,293 --> 00:35:28,337 They're too damn perfect. 635 00:35:28,545 --> 00:35:32,049 I mean, they don't understand that people like you and me, 636 00:35:32,132 --> 00:35:33,592 well, that we screw up. 637 00:35:33,634 --> 00:35:37,054 Yeah, well, this was no ordinary mistake. This was... 638 00:35:37,471 --> 00:35:39,640 This was something terrible. 639 00:35:39,723 --> 00:35:41,391 Was it something gay? 640 00:35:41,475 --> 00:35:42,601 What? 641 00:35:42,893 --> 00:35:45,229 Of course it wasn't. Keep talking. 642 00:35:45,312 --> 00:35:48,232 Trust me. Bree will never forgive me. 643 00:35:49,149 --> 00:35:53,487 You know what? Maybe she shouldn't. Maybe I'm not worthy of forgiveness. 644 00:35:54,655 --> 00:35:55,781 Well, 645 00:35:57,574 --> 00:35:59,910 are you sorry for what you did? 646 00:36:01,578 --> 00:36:04,581 Yes. More than anyone will ever know. 647 00:36:05,499 --> 00:36:07,501 Well, then you're worthy. 648 00:36:13,382 --> 00:36:15,092 Thank you, Edie. 649 00:36:15,425 --> 00:36:17,928 Oh, don't start. 650 00:36:18,595 --> 00:36:21,849 I'm drunk. I'm gonna start crying, too. Come on... 651 00:36:22,266 --> 00:36:24,768 You're a good person, Edie Britt. 652 00:36:26,186 --> 00:36:27,980 Well, you're not so bad yourself. 653 00:36:28,021 --> 00:36:29,189 (CHUCKLING) 654 00:36:38,699 --> 00:36:40,242 I don't... I don't think we should... 655 00:36:40,284 --> 00:36:41,785 You're right. 656 00:36:42,578 --> 00:36:43,954 Bad idea. 657 00:36:45,289 --> 00:36:47,332 I blame the Hodge formula. 658 00:36:48,458 --> 00:36:49,626 Yes. 659 00:36:51,795 --> 00:36:56,925 Well, you're probably tired. Let me get your room ready for you. 660 00:37:11,481 --> 00:37:12,608 Mom? 661 00:37:13,358 --> 00:37:15,068 Can I talk to you? 662 00:37:15,652 --> 00:37:17,029 Of course. 663 00:37:21,325 --> 00:37:22,493 (SIGHS) 664 00:37:22,576 --> 00:37:24,828 I guess I just have to say it. 665 00:37:26,580 --> 00:37:28,499 I've been lying to you. 666 00:37:28,916 --> 00:37:30,584 There is no boy. 667 00:37:31,585 --> 00:37:32,669 And? 668 00:37:33,962 --> 00:37:35,214 And... 669 00:37:36,340 --> 00:37:39,760 Well, I've been meeting someone. That part is true. 670 00:37:41,512 --> 00:37:43,013 But it's Dad. 671 00:37:43,680 --> 00:37:45,641 I've been meeting Dad. 672 00:37:48,435 --> 00:37:49,686 Really. 673 00:37:50,771 --> 00:37:52,731 So you're not upset? 674 00:37:54,358 --> 00:37:57,736 You made it very clear that you wanted to meet your father. 675 00:37:57,945 --> 00:38:00,197 So I knew this day was coming. 676 00:38:01,031 --> 00:38:02,908 And I prepared myself. 677 00:38:04,701 --> 00:38:06,912 Well, can I go get him, then? 678 00:38:14,962 --> 00:38:17,089 Come in! She says it's okay! 679 00:38:26,640 --> 00:38:28,100 Hey, Kathy. 680 00:38:30,769 --> 00:38:32,479 Been a long time. 681 00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:37,192 Dylan, why don't you go up to your room so we can catch up? 682 00:38:40,404 --> 00:38:42,364 It's all right. Really. 683 00:38:42,781 --> 00:38:44,116 Go ahead. 684 00:38:51,248 --> 00:38:55,169 You did a great job with her. She's a wonderful girl. 685 00:38:59,173 --> 00:39:02,342 You look fantastic. Haven't aged a day. 686 00:39:09,266 --> 00:39:11,643 Look, I'm here for Dylan, okay? 687 00:39:12,102 --> 00:39:14,605 I'm sure that's what you told her. 688 00:39:14,813 --> 00:39:17,024 And I'm sure she believed it. 689 00:39:17,441 --> 00:39:19,610 Because she doesn't know you. 690 00:39:20,444 --> 00:39:21,695 But I do. 691 00:39:21,778 --> 00:39:26,950 No, you don't, Kathy. Not any more. It's been a long time, 12 years. 692 00:39:27,701 --> 00:39:29,745 I know exactly how long it's been. 693 00:39:29,786 --> 00:39:32,664 Okay. Good. Because I'm... 694 00:39:34,208 --> 00:39:36,877 I've changed. I'm a different man now. 695 00:39:39,087 --> 00:39:42,466 You have to admit that that's possible, right? 696 00:39:42,966 --> 00:39:44,760 You've changed, huh? 697 00:39:45,344 --> 00:39:47,179 Well, maybe you have. 698 00:39:48,138 --> 00:39:50,974 I have. Like to know how? 699 00:39:51,058 --> 00:39:53,769 Sure, if you want to tell me. 700 00:39:56,396 --> 00:39:58,732 I'm not scared of you any more. 701 00:40:00,317 --> 00:40:02,653 Good. You don't have to be. 702 00:40:06,448 --> 00:40:09,243 I'm not the same woman you knocked around. 703 00:40:09,910 --> 00:40:13,330 The woman you punched and choked. 704 00:40:14,498 --> 00:40:17,668 The one whose blood you licked off your knuckles. 705 00:40:18,710 --> 00:40:20,170 She's gone. 706 00:40:22,089 --> 00:40:24,842 So you'll just have to prove you're a man 707 00:40:26,343 --> 00:40:27,970 some other way. 708 00:40:29,513 --> 00:40:31,974 You trying to make me mad, Kathy? 709 00:40:36,687 --> 00:40:38,856 I didn't know I still could. 710 00:40:42,609 --> 00:40:43,861 Can I? 711 00:40:47,531 --> 00:40:50,492 This is a lot to deal with after so long, I guess. 712 00:40:51,451 --> 00:40:54,163 I shouldn't have sprung it on you all at once. 713 00:40:54,163 --> 00:40:56,623 Tell Dylan I'll call her tomorrow. 714 00:41:05,465 --> 00:41:08,552 And you're as beautiful as you ever were, Kat. 715 00:41:13,390 --> 00:41:14,850 Good night. 716 00:41:19,563 --> 00:41:20,731 (GASPS) 717 00:41:28,739 --> 00:41:30,240 MARY ALICE: The word "welcome" 718 00:41:30,324 --> 00:41:33,952 always carries with it a certain amount of risk. 719 00:41:34,411 --> 00:41:40,292 After all, to let someone into your home is to let them into your life. 720 00:41:42,377 --> 00:41:47,382 And we never know what sorts of horrible secrets they carry with them. 721 00:41:50,594 --> 00:41:56,725 We can't foresee the painful effect they might have on our loved ones. 722 00:42:00,521 --> 00:42:05,818 We don't anticipate the gossip that could result from their presence. 723 00:42:08,111 --> 00:42:11,323 Yes, we must be very careful 724 00:42:11,365 --> 00:42:13,951 with those we invite into our lives. 725 00:42:15,494 --> 00:42:19,665 Because some will refuse to leave.