(gunshot)
Captioning made possible by a&e television networks
(doorbell rings)
Yes?
You?
Archie Goodwin. What's your name?
Mr. Yeager.
How do you do?
(Archie) In his $39 suit and $3 shirt,
thomas yeager didn't have the air of a man
who might make a sizable contribution
to Nero Wolfe's bank balance.
I admitted him anyway.
I'll have to tell you who i am, of course.
Not unless it's material.
Else there was no use coming.
Well, fire away.
This, uh, is in the strictest of confidence.
Ah, yes, well, of course.
Unless you're loaded with something too heavy for me,
like murder or treason.
"Other sins only speak, murder shrieks out.
Treason doth never prosper."
Fear not, mr. Goodwin, i am loaded with neither.
Oh, good.
My name is, uh, thomas yeager.
I'm vice president of continental plastics,
and i think i'm being followed.
Mr. Yeager, is it?
Listen, that's, uh, kindergarten stuff.
I mean, any reputable agency...
what agency would have a man as good as you?
Hey, well, even if i'm half as good asithink i am,
it would be to waste me spotting a tail.
No, but this is special.
I suspect i'm being followed only at certain times.
I expect to be followed
when i leave my home at 34 east 68th street
at seven this evening
to go across the park to 156 west 82nd street.
You see, i don't want it known that i have
any connection with that address.
If i'm not followed, that would be the end of it.
Until i go the next time, of course.
Well, which is more important to you,
not to be followed or to identify...
they're both important.
I'll expect you a
no, no, hold on, hold on.
Please, if you will.
Now, at 7:00, you're to leave your house,
go over to second avenue, walk 30 paces,
you'll see a lunch room.
In frontthe lunch room there'll be a taxi.
Go up to the taxi driver and say, "you need a shave."
He will say to you, "my face is tender."
Give him the address.
Get in the cab, sit back and relax.
I knew you'd be the man for it.
"Measure your mind's height by the shadow it casts."
I often do.
Thank you.
Hey, buddy, got a match?
Oh! I could diet tack.
Are you crazy?
I gotta go, i gotta tell 'em what to put on the front page.
You never leave the building before midnight.
That's 'cause i'm always giving the mayor advice.
What is it?
What do you got on a guy named thomas yeager,
vice president, continental plastics?
Not much, but i could have the morgue send stuff up.
Why?
He's real?
Well, continental plastics, one of the big ones,
and he's been vice president five years now.
Come on, that's it? All, all this for that?
That's it. Come on, that's it? All, all this for that?
I can go now?
Yeah.
Good. Thank you.
Oh... just remember, treason never does prosper.
Okay.
(boys) Shoot it.
Shoot the ball!
Come on, over here, over here.
Pass it!
Pass it. Come on.
He takes a clear shot...
over here.
He scores!
Where'd the ball go?
Where'd the ball go? There it is.
(gasps) Let's get out of here!
It's 7:30, where is he?
Where he isn't.30, where is he?
I'm gonna go phone him.
If he comes while
have trouble starting your engine
until i come back out.
(phone rings)
Mrs. Yeager's resi
ah... hello.
Could i speak to mr. Yeager?
Who is this, please?
With cramer and stebbins at yeager's place,
my curiosity was piqued.
I needed more information from lon.
Coffee, please.
Here.
How the hell did you know that thomas g. Yeager
was gonna be murdered when you saw me three hours ago?
Well, i didn't, i don't. I merely wanted...
yeah, balls. Thank you.
Well, anyway, i appreciate the page one box,
"Nero Wolfe scoops cops again."
How does this sound?
"Nero Wolfe, private eye extraordinaire,
"was delving deep into the yeager murder
"hours before the body was even discovered.
Meanwhile, his lackey, Archie Goodwin, saw this reporter..."
wait, wait, hold on, hold on!
The whole world knows i'm not a lackey.
I'm not a lackey.
I'm a, um... a flunky.
Yes, you are. So, give.
Well, you need to pretend for a moment that i did not know
r was killed well, you need to pretend for until you told me. D not knoweage
no, no, just pretend.
When did they find the body?
10 after 7:00.
Playing ball. Kids
they chase a stray into this construction site.
And therped up nicely in a t arp.
How do they know he was murdered?
Well, he had a big hole in his head,
wasn't made by his finger.
Apparently, the body had been there since the night before.
You two guys call this in?
(Archie) Wait a minute...
they hauled his body over a pile of gravel
and then tucked him in with a tarp?
Yeah, i only report the news.
"Thomas yeager speaking at the banquet
of the national plastics association."
Archie, Archie, i was sitting there
with this entire yeager file
opened on my desk when the flash came.
And in about an hour,
the whole city desk is gonna be wondering,
how come i was such a genius to know to ask for that file.
And if i tell them, some benevolent soul
is gonna wanna tell the cops.
Yes, yes...
you want a milkshake?
Can i have a milkshake, please?
Strawberry!
Why did it take so long for them to discover the body?
Nobody was working.
There was something wrong with the equipment.
Would you tell me what's going on here, please?
Look, i know absolutely nothing about...
no, i know nothing, absolutely nothing about thomas yeager
except what i have read in your file.
That's fine, that's foronthe record.
What about between us?
Come off it, i'm offering you a deal here.
If you forget my curiosity about thomas yeager,
i will put you on my christmas card list.
Christmas?
Cohen, spelled c-o-h-e-n.
I wanted to go investigate on 82nd street,
but intelligence, guided by experience,
told me Wolfe needed to be informed in person,
or he would refuse to play.
The, uh, quarterly tax payments will be due in 37 days.
Must you harp on the obvious?
I would like permission to dig up a client.
By what modus, a sandwich board?
Heh-heh, that's funny, you're very funny.
No no, i have a target.
Well, a possible target anyway.
This afternoon, a man named thomas yeager came by
and hired me to follow him to a specific address
and to see if i could spot a tail.
Ah, so you have a client?
No.
No?
Thomas yeager is dead.
His body was found very near
that specific address at seven p.m.
Then it's over?
Uh, no.
No.
No, because the client is not dead.
Archie.
I suppose it would be more accurate to say
we neverhad a client because...
the man who came to see me was not thomas yeager.
You see, this is thomas yeager giving a speech.
Beyond all doubt?
Yes, sir.
And his body was found near the address
named by the impostor yeager?
Yeah, and the block there on 82nd street
is no place for some corporate big shot.
Then you will spend the evening at the typewriter.
Record your conversation with the impostor, verbatim.
Well, you're the boss.
So the body lay there all day?
Yes, very, very well hidden, i might add.
If he was killed elsewhere and brought to 82nd street
to impress or implicate someone at that address,
the body would not have been hidden.
It would have been displayed.
So, can we assume yeager was killed inside
and the body hidden in the closest spot?
It doesn't account for the tarp over him,
15682nd street was a sl
peculiar for a slum: Anabloydoor lock,
for which you have to be willing to shell out 61.50.
You want something?
Yes, i'm here to see the superin... tendent.
Did i just stammer when i said that?
Are you a policeman?
No, a newspaperman.
I know i'm supposed to say something right now,
but the only thing i can think of is, uh...
will you marry me?
Papa!
A newspaperman!
Maria.
Name's Goodwin, i'm with thegazette.
I want to rent a room for $100 a week.
No rooms.
Okay, $200... i wanna get pictures of people
coming to see the scene of a murder.
I said, no rooms.
300. No.
All right, 500. You're loco.
I'm loco?
You're snitting your nose at $500 a week.
What's your name?
Cesar Perez.
I am a citizen of the United States of America.
Yes? Well, so am I.
Only i'm not with thegazette.
I, uh, i work for Nero Wolfe.
And fer not to tell the police
that we know yeager was killed here on sunday.
Get out, get out! Get out of this house!
Did you kill yeager?
I got a knife.
I got this.
Qui, Cesar. I got this. S a
el sbe.
Pare con esso, va pensar que son secretos.
Habla ingles.
My husband did not kill mr. House.
Mr. Yeager, we call him mr. House
because he owns the building.
How do you know he was killed here?
Well, that might take awhile.
Do you have a room inside with some chairs?
No... we sit down with friends.
I can stand on my feet if you can.
Now, who was mr. House coming to see on sunday?
(mrs. Perez) I don't know.
Why don't you try that again.
Have you ever been up there?
Look, i'm asking the questions here.
He came around 7:00.
He asked my husband to bring him roast pheasant and oysters
from the usual place.
If someone come later, we don't hear.
We weren't supposed to hear.
Hmm.
Have you ever been up to the room?
We clean every day.
Ah, so you got keys.
Maria, vete tu cuarto.
Pero, mama... anda, andate de aqui.
Go.
Well, well, well.
(clears throat)
Have you cleaned here since sunday?
Si, yesterday morning.
Why'd you kill him? Because of maria?
Me? No.
All right, look, you got rid of the fingerprints here,
i understand that,
but there's prints all over that tarp.
And if one of them matches yours, you're done.
Felita.
Esta bien.
You are a private detective, so we pay you, $100.
No, not if you killed yeager.
I told him he must put on gloves,
but he didn't.
My husband come running to me,
what could we do?
If we call a policeman, we know what would happen.
And i couldn't sleep with that thing up there.
(elevator running)
Someone's coming up!
All right, don't think, don't lie...
why would you cover him in a tarp?
He was dead.
A man dead, you cover him.
Ah, well, you should have worn gloves.
Now, stand back.
(gasps)
Oh, ha-ha, thank god!
It's mrs. Perez, isn't it?
We don't know you.
(Archie) I do!
It's meg duncan,
the lovely star of "back door garden".
Who are you?
Oh, oh, ohhh!
I saw your show last week from the eighth row.
You were wonderful.
Do you really think so?
Now, i'm not a cop, i work for Nero Wolfe.
Oh, you're...
you're Nero Wolfe's Archie Goodwin.
Yes.
Ahh... i just came to get something that belongs to me.
Something with my initials on it, okay?
It's a, uh, a cigarette case.
Whenid you leave it here?
I didn't say i had.
How did it get here?
Does that matter, mr. Goodwin?
Why did you kill yeager?
You brute!
Ohh, you are a man, aren't you?
Naw, i'm just a working detective.
Did you kill yeager?
Of course not.
I know i can't bribe you, mr. Goodwin,
but, look,
just get me my cigarette case
and give it to me whenever you want,
and i'll pay whatever you say... $1,000?
Well, well, my stock is going up.
You know, just a little while ago,
mrs. Perez dangled a hundred in front of me,
and now you're offering me a grand.
Yes.
Well... (ticks tongue)
However...
too many clients can be worse than too few.
Now, if i happen to find your cigarette case,
you can come and retrieve it at Nero Wolfe's office
at say, 2:30?
You don't have a matinee today.
But, why can't you...
and, uh, give me your key.
My key?
Give me your key.
My key.
The key, that got you in here.
My key.
Right.
Here is my key.
Thank you for coming.
Run along.
Yes! Yes.
But why can't you... ah!
Please, i'll try to find your little case.
Until 2:30, mr. Goodwin.
Now, when she saw you, she said,
"thank god, mrs. Perez."
I'm... she must have seen me when she come in.
I don't know her.
We were paid not to know her.
At it. U're
at it. The only reason i believe is the expression
on your husband's face when he told me about the tarp.
Now, i am gonna send a man to stay here.
You are to supply him with food,
which i will pay for.
I expect to see you at Nero Wolfe's office
today at 3:00, do you got that?
All right, i need you to leave
so i can have a look around.
(mrs. Perez) You take things?
If i take something that you think i shouldn't,
op.
(Archie) I couldn't find saul, so i sent for Fred
and told him to pack a bag for a week.
Then i got to work investigating.
Your new home, i hope you enjoy it.
I'll make do.
Pah! I won't see them.
(Archie) Well, naturally, you don't like it.
I mean, there may be 20 women
with a key to that room.
Now, i realize you won't want to be involved
with that kind of setup.
Nonsense.
Yes, modern satyr is part man, part pig, part jackass.
He hasn't even the charm of the roguish.
He doesn't lean gracefully against a tree
with a flute in his hands.
The preposterous bower of carnality you have described
is a sorry makeshift.
But at least mr. Yeager tried.
A pig and a jackass, yes, yes.
But the flute strain was in him.
As it once was in me, hmm.
No doubt he deserved to die, but,
i would welcome a sufficient inducement
to expose his killer.
You would?
Certainly.
Ohh.
But your objective was to find an acceptable client.
I concede your craft, your finesse,
i even felicitate you,
but where are we to send a bill?
Well, we know about the preposterous bower.
And are we blackmailers?
All right, all right.
What about the man who came, posed as yeager?
Yes.
Manifestly, he has an educated fondness for words.
"Elsethere would be no use in coming."
Extraordinary, "else" instead of "or".
Yes, it was the first thing i noticed.
Then, merely talking along, he said,
"other sins only speak, murder shrieks out."
John webster, "the duchess of malfl".
And "measure your mind's height by the shadow it casts."
Robert browning, i had to look that up.
Browning repels me.
Oh, me too.
Was he trying to impress you?
Impress me? No.
Just so, he, he had them on the tip of his tongue.
A what?
He teaches literature.
Oh... uh, well, that's a relief.
If he knew yeager was dead, perhaps because he killed him,
why did he come here with that tarradiddle?
Well, if he killed yeager and then he came here,
then he's cracked.
But i saw him, you know,
and he wasn't, he wasn't cracked.
Then he did not know.
(doorbell rings) Then he did not know.
I would like to speak with him.
, i would too, i would like to speak with him.
And that's why i, uh, i put Fred there.
Phooey!
You got Fred there because i cannot now
merely say that the incident is closed.
Yes, Fritz.
A duncan, sir.
Well, did he find it?
Yes, he did.
And you may have it back for $50,000.
50,000?
Oh, but you don't mean that, you can't.
Do not smoke a cigarette in my office.
If you wish to smoke, go out on the stoop.
Put it out!
All right, i'll put it out.
Are you familiar with the statutes
regarding the suppression of evidence?
My cigarette case isn't evidence.
I didn't say it was.
I wasn't in that room on sunday night.
For us to return a cigarette case
that might convict a murderer
is far too great a risk for $1,000.
You may have it for $50,000 with a certified check.
Well, why not a million?
That would depend on how you answer my questions.
You haven't asked me any.
When was the last time you were in that room?
I didn't say i was in that room.
That's egregious, you had keys.
Oh, my god.
Mr. Wolfe, this could ruin my career.
Must you drag me into it?
I did not drag you into that room this morning, madam.
Oh, god.
Mr. Wolfe has asked you not to smoke.
When you did visit it... i mean the room...
were there others?
No.
But you knew there were others.
I knew there were others.
He wanted you to know.
He derived... pleasure,
not only from his present companion,
but from her awareness of her colleagues...
many colleagues.
Surely, he was not silent about them,
surely, he spoke of them...
in comparison... praise or derogation?
Madam, if you wish to have this episode
pass into history as quickly as possible,
tell me about the others.
Are you going to keep my cigarette case?
For the present, yes.
Then you have me at your mercy.
I wish i'd clawed your eyes out.
Can i get your autograph?
(elevator running)
(straining)
(shrieking)
Put me dt me down!
(speaking spanish)
(yelling in spanish)
I won't insist you fill me in verbatim.
She killed him.
Of course, after all, he was paying them
$300 a month to keep his tenement.
She discovered that yeager had debauched her daughter,
and she killed him.
She said that? Certainly not.
She resented the implication with fury.
Yes, yes, well, so do i.
Maria's not debauched.
Call Fred in.
If and when she orgies with a satyr,
he will lean gracefully against a tree
while playing the flute.
Orgy is not a verb.
It is now.
(phone ringing)
Nero Wolfe's office...
Archie, i got one.
It's Fred, he's caught a fish.
Instructions?
What good would it do to give you instructions?
Fred. Yes, sir.
She ain't hurt any.
I wish she was, look what she did to me.
Wow.
Did you tell her who you are?
No, i wouldn't do her the favor.
That's her bag over there.
Who are you?
I will, uh, unwrap you in a minute, uh, miss...
julia mcgee.
Yeah, uh, Nero Wolfe
wants to talk to anybody who has a key to this room.
Let me up!
The police, of course, would be interested, too.
Well, why don't you think it over there
while we unwrap you... Fred?
Oof!
I... am mr. Yeager's private secretary.
I came here to get the dictation book
oh, there's no dictation book here.
Maybe you left it somewhere else.
So, this is yeager's room.
Well, now that i know that...
no, Fred, you don't know that.
The less you know the better.
Now, i lied to her, and she fell for it.
I am not answering any of your questions.
Where is there a phone?
Follow me.
Or i will follow you.
There was a man there, and they attacked me,
and they've taken me to Nero Wolfe's.
Yes, of course.
Mr. Aiken will be here in 20 minutes.
And who is mr. Aiken? Aiken?
Benedict aiken?
He's the president of continental plastics.
(whistles)
When did you leave
your dictation book there?
I should let you know that i'm not going to answer
any questions until mr. Aiken gets here.
Well, that won't do.
I can't prevent him from coming,
but he'll enter when it's convenient for me.
Fine.
I went to that room this evening because mr. Aiken
wanted me to see if there was anything there
to con with it.
And he provided you with keys?
No, mr. Yeager did.
I had been there on a few occasions to take dictation.
And do you think it a suitablemilieu
for business dictation?
No, i thought it was very vulgar for him to ask me there.
But he was my boss, and it wasn't my place to think.
Finally, i decided that my loyalty
shouldn't be to mr. Yeager, but to the corporation.
It paid my salary, after all.
So, a month ago, i told mr. Aiken.
And that's all i'm saying until he gets here.
Sir...
when miss mcgee told me abo
i asked her to mention it to no one,
but not to refuse to go back there again.
I wanted time to consider how to deal with this.
Did you mention it to yeager?
No, i was about to take it up
with my board of directors
when we received news of his death.
Naturally, that was unpleasant,
well, very unpleasanurdered,
but it would be disastrous for continental plastics
if the existence of that room became known.
You won't deny that's a legitimate concern.
Legitimate and desperate.
You cannot possibly hope
that his connection will never be divulged.
I don't hope... i act.
And i will pay you to tell me how you learned of the room.
Oh, i don't sell information, sir, i sell services.
I'm buying them. I'm hiring you.
To do what?
Whatever is necessary
to protect the reputation of my corporation.
I can't undertake not to disclose
mr. Yeager's connection.
Events might take charge.
For me to take charge of events.
How?
By guiding them.
The most feasible plan, seems to me,
is to provide the police with a solution to the murder
which does not involve that room.
And if that proves to be impossible?
It will have been a waste of your money.
My self-esteem is not up to tackling the impossible, sir.
All right, then.
Archie, the typewriter, two carbons.
On behalf of the corporation, i hereby hire Nero Wolfe
to perform the task of protecting...
"...and Nero Wolfe will disclose no facts
"unless he is compelled to do so
"by his legal obligation
as a citizen and a licensed detective."
Your fee isn't specified.
It will depend on what i do.
And who decides if you have
faithfully observed that provision?
Reason and good faith, jointlapplied.
How did you discover that room?
I don't start a difficult job by babbling.
Don't be absurd, you're working for me.
Confound it, sir!
Do you want me to do this job or no?
It's not what i want, it's what i am stuck with.
You are my handle.
Miss mcgee.
(Archie) One thing we had learned:
(Archie) One thing we had learned: Mcg ee was a liar.
No man had his secretary come to that room for dictation...
not even if she was a lump...
which julia mcgee definitely was not.
(straining)
I was a witling to take this job.
All i can do is flounder around in the slush.
Yeah...
yesterday we had too many clients...
today, we have only one, but that's still too many
because we cannot possibly fill his order.
Nothing in that room should connect it to yeager, nothing.
It's hopeless.
He owned it, it will be an item in his estate.
The house, not the room.
We could try a coup.
We could offer mr. And mrs. Perez $20,000
to move to some far corner of the earth,
provided they sign a confession,
then deliverolice once they are safely away.
We could do that.
Ah, wonderful.
Only has one flaw...
they didn't kill him.
That's your opinion.
My opinion...
it's an opinion that has damn good legs under it.
How about some, you know,
good old-fashioned detective work here.
Means, motive, opportunity.
Oh, sure, you flee,
because you know reason can't crack this.
I mean, what this case needs
is a good old-fashioned dose of genius, but apparently
you haven't turned the switch on.
You know... or luck, we could use some luck,
but i don't know where you keep it hidden.
You know, just in case.
Phooey!
It's too much.
As opposed torouge.
So which are you using?
I'm going to use therougefor color.
Yes, well, if you need that book,
you're not cooking for me.
Pardon?
$14,682,235 and 50... what is this?
That is the cash reserves of continental plastics.
After i finished sweeping the sidewalk,
i had nothing else left to do.
You know i like to keep busy, so...
yes.
(doorbell rings)
Well...
maybe you have some luck after all.
Nero Wolfe?
Well, it's his house.
I want to see him.
Uh, yes, but normally...
i'm ellen yeager, mrs. Thomas g. Yeager.
How much do you want as a retainer?
Uh, ladies and gentlemen, client number four.
I want you to find out who killed my husband
and exactly what happened.
And then, i will decide what to do about it.
Madam, in the interest of your protection, l...
don't bother, i know all about it.
He was a sick man.
Completely oversexed.
I've kept still about it for years, but not anymore.
Shut up!
I'm blunt because i can't let you rattle off
confidential information
under the illusion that you're hiring me.
You can't.
I've already been engaged to investigate
the murder of your husband.
You are not.
Indeed, i am.
No, you're engaged
to keep it from being investigated.
The board doesn't care about the murderer being caught.
All they care about is the corporation.
I have a block of stock now, i don't care.
They can't keep me from telling the district attorney
about that room if i decide to.
What room?
You know perfectly well what room.
Julia mcgee went there last night,
ught her here. Julia mcgee went there last night, and you bro
benedict aiken told a board member, and he told me.
You're Archie Goodwin? I want to see that room.
Now, where is it?
How much do you want for your retainer?
Archie... the, uh, typewriter.
Two carbons.
I, mrs. Thomas yeager,
hereby engage Nero Wolfe to investigate the circumstances
of the death of my husband.
Ah-ah-ah!
Don't you think... that this would be
a great place for a p.t.a. Meeting?
What's your name, honey?
Oh, don't tell me you're modest.
Do you want me to leave?
Yes. No.
Well, maybe i will.
And maybe i won't.
Comnna be?
Loosen up, you'll live longer.
If, in trying to find the murderer,
a conflict exists between his contract
with continental plastics...
(ellen yeager) "...it is understood
"that he will terminate his engagement
"with continental plastics
"and will adhere to this engagement with me.
"It is also understood that i, mrs. Thomas yeager,
"will do nothing to interfere with this investigation
without giving him notice in advance"?
This isn't right.
I told you, i want you to find out
who killed my husband,
and then, tell me andi will decide what to do.
Nonsense, the people of the state of new york
will decide what to do.
Well, i'm not gonna sign it.
I promised my husband i would
never sign anything without showing him first.
What?
Perhaps you would like me to sign it.
Well, it doesn't do any good to sign the thing.
What counts is what you do, not what you sign.
Now, how much do you want for a retainer?
I do not ask for a retainer.
Nor do i ask for a fee,
if that you killed your husband.
You won't!
There was a time when i... felt like killing him.
But that was years ago, when the children were young.
Now, how much do you want?
One dollar.
Now...
i want to see that room!
No, not now.
But i want to see that room, and i want to see it now.
You, you said that you have known for years
that your husband was oversexed.
You used the word "sick" yourself, so presumably...
yes, yes... i asked my doctor if there was something
that could be done, but there was no use.
My husband wouldn't do it.
(doorbell rings)
I have a friend whose husband is an alcoholic...
it's the same thing.
You went to see a therapist?
(Archie) Inspector cramer of homicide west
has never been a client, and his expression made it clear
he hadn't come to ante a retainer.
Greetings, i'd open up, but he has company.
Yeah, i know.
Does mrs. Thomas yeager ring a bell?
She's been here for nearly half an hour, open up.
Uh, make yourself at home, i'll go check.
Yeah, the, uh...
the man, uh, the man about the chair?
Uh... his man brought the chair
about half an hour ago and wants to discuss it.
The chair.
Yes.
Mrs. Yeager, inspector cramer
from the new york city police department
is at the door, he knows you're here.
He does not! How could he?
Why do i bother talking in code
when you're gonna just tell her who it is?
Well, presumably, you might be under surveillance.
(shrieks) How dare they!
Me! Ahh!
Am i being followed around?
Good day, ms. Yeager.
Am i being followed around?
Well, when there's a murderer on the loose,
we don't like to take any chances.
You didn't protect my husband,
you didn't even find his body.
Well, there are things to protect you from
beside personal violence.
Heh-heh, like, uh... making mistakes.
If you said anything to Wolfe about your husband's death...
i hired him to find out who killed my husband!
If i had anything to tell anybody, i'll tell him, not you.
Now get out of my way.
I want to know what you told Wolfe!
Ask him.
Goodwin!
When are you gonna take me to see that room?
As soon as i can.
Hurry up!
Why did you have Goodwin ask lon cohen
for the dope on mrs. Yeager
two hours before yeager's body was found?
Hmm, that is specific.
Can you be specific?
I don't know that that's such
a good idea, mr. Gerson.
You might get into some trouble.
Certainly.
I'll call back.
How did you know he was dead?
I didn't know he was dead.
Someone, call him "x", said something in this room
that made mr. Goodwin ask mr. Cohen for information.
But first, nothing that "x" said
indicated that he knew yeager was dead,
and second, nothing "x" said was true.
Is "x" mrs. Yeager?
No, i wouldn't name him if i could...
but i can't.
Mm-hmm, okay, all right.
Okay.
But you're taking a big risk, Wolfe.
Puedemos quedarnos.
Vendran por nosotros y te prendran preso.
Uerte vendran por nosotros cambio. Y te prendran preso. S
que iriamos sinte, Cesar?
There is a woman upstairs.
Yeah, that's why i'm here.
Wait. No!
Si, tenemos a decirle. We must tell him.
Maria agrees with me.
Do you want me to break the tie?
If you are not an honest man, may the good god help us.
Da me lo.
"John morton seymour, attorney at law."
He gave it to us.
He say mr. Yeager tell him to give it to us
48 hours after he died.
Hmm... a deed.
He gave you the house, wonderful.
How long have you known about this?
We didn't know.
Go away tonight, but now we fight. To
this mr. Seymour, he say that mr. Yeager
make it so that nobody ever know he own this house.
And we must no say he own it.
So i say we stay.
Yeager told you, didn't he?
That was his mistake.
You knew the house would be yours when he died.
If you listen, do you call us liars?
You got a bible?
Por supuesto. Of course.
All right, i'm gonna choose to believe you.
But you better not skip town,
that's the worst thing you can do.
(gasps)
You.
Why did you do that? This is my room.
Yeah, well, i'm a detective,
and as you know, detectives have bad habits.
How many times have you been in the room upstairs?
I am not allowed up there.
Ah...
and why should i tell you anyway?
So you can go and tell my mother?
Excuse me, i shut the door now.
(bang)
A nice talk with you would've been more desirable.
So, what do you like to do on your weekends?
I spend a lot of time with my wife.
Am i intruding?
Oh, it's you.
Well, when Fred said that Archie Goodwin was coming,
i nearly swooned.
I've seen you at "the flamingo".
(Archie) Any woman who could thaw Fred
on assignment was worth a serious look.
Especially since she was more comfortable here
than anyone else so far.
That's not very nice, is it?
Yeah, well, see, i'm only nice when i'm dancing.
"Mrs. Dinah hough, 64 eden street."
Why are you here, uh, mrs. Hough?
My umbrella.
Right, well, it's in the closet there.
You'll have to manage, though, without it for a while.
How'd it get here?
I left it here.
You know what? I need a refill.
I'll get it myself.
Fred?
Why don't you tell me about thomas yeager?
Him about why don't you tell me three weeks ago. Thomas yeager?
He said he knew a place that was worth coming.
And i came... once.
I mean, he didn't actually assault me, but, uh,
never say anything bad about the dead.
I am not actually worried about being suspected,
but, uh, i know how clever they are at tracing things,
and well, if things were to get out
my husband might lose his job.
Ah, yes, he works for continental plastics?
Oh, no, no, no, for n.y.u.
He's a professor.
Well, an assistant professor.
A professor, huh?
Mm-hmm. Of what?
English lit.
Ahh... ah, yes.
"Measure your mind's height by the shadow it casts."
(knock at door)
"Other sins only speak, murder shrieks out."
How in the name of god...
there's nothing i'd enjoy more than chatting with you,
but mr. Wolfe will be down from the plant room soon.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Who are you?
I am the ghost of thomas g. Yeager.
Don't be a sap, you can't get away with it.
We'll see about that.
How do you think i got this address?
I just had a little talk with your wife.
That's a lie.
Oh, yeah, dinah hough, hazel eyes,
tilts her head a little to the right when she...
where did you see her?
I'm not giving you any more than that.
Ask mr. Wolfe, ome on.
Where is my wife?
(Wolfe) Mr. Hough, would you like the police
to know your name and address?
Until mr. Goodwin tells me where he saw my wife,
i'm explaining nothing.
Very well... Archie?
Yes, your wife, she came to
156 west 82nd street this afternoon.
She had keys.
Your position is futile, mr. Hough.
What did you hope to accomplish
by sending mr. Goodwin on a pointless errand?
You talked to her, Goodwin, what did she tell you?
Yeah, i talked to her and i gotta tell you,
as lies go, it was not a very good one.
She said she had been to that apartment
only once and hadn't stayed long.
Why did you think that was a lie?
No, no, i...
i didn't think it was a lie, i knew it was a lie.
Mr. Hough, we have humored you,
but our indulgence is not boundless.
My wife...
my wife shouldn't have married me.
She wanted things i couldn't supply.
She wanted to do things that i'm not inclined to.
So she did them without me.
About a year ago, she suddenly had a watch
that must have cost $1,000.
Then she had a fur coat.
And then she started coming home after dawn.
(dinah laughing)
I descended into snooping.
"Curiosity creeps into the homes of the unfortunate
under the names of duty or pity."
Pascal.
Nietzsche.
At least my wife came home that evening.
I didn't ask her where she'd been.
I hadn't asked her that for a year.
But i found out who he was.
I found a telephone number
scribbled on a scrap of paper in her purse.
So, you came to see mr. Goodwin.
Yes, i knew that when mr. Yeager didn't turn up,
mr. Goodwin would find out why.
He would describe me to yeager,
and yeager would tell my wife.
And she would know that i know.
You see, that's what was most important.
I couldn't tell her.
I wanted her to know that i knew.
God she wasn't i wanted her to know there on sunday. Hank
are you sure of that?
Certainly i'm sure, mr. Wolfe.
We sleep in separate beds,
but when she turns over, i hear her.
I seldom feel sorry for people that Wolfe has in a corner.
They usually deserve it, but this time, i was tempted.
Oh, it's cold today.
I heard this show is supposed to be very good,
so, i am excited.
Oh, no...
i forgot my money.
Okay, you two keep going
and i'll catch up with you later, okay?
See you.
Archie.
We've received a letter from farmer jenkins.
You remember him, from putnam county.
He would like to know how many starlings
we'll be requiring this year.
Please reply to him that we will take the usual 40.
Wolfe was so desperate to avoid work,
he surprised me,
but then he finally caved in.
But then he finally caved in. Know, your exclusion of mr. And mrs. Perez
is no longer valid...
they knew they would get the house.
Nor is that pathetic imbecile hough excluded.
He could have taken the keys from his wife
and killed yeager and, uh, took some action
that would make it seem highly unlikely that he did.
Well, that only has three holes as far as i can see.
Well, i see four.
None beyond patching.
Problem is, we don't have a single card to play,
you realize that?
Our big ace, that we know abou worthless.
Longer we keep it up our sleeve,
the more ticklish it becomes when the police find...
good night to you, too!
(phone ringing)
Hello?
Si.
No.
No, no...
(sobbing)
I told you we sit down with friends.
Are you a friend?
You can do nothing, nobody can.
Not even god himself.
That's the trouble with a time like this.
There's nooom for anything except... she's dead.
But i have room,
i have room for wanting to know who killed her.
I'll kill him.
Calmate.
Anything about her going out that
might have had something to do with yeager?
She knew nothing about yeager.
She never spoke with him.
And she knew nothing about the women who came here.
Well, i don't believe that.
Now, she had very good ears.
She heard me enter this house.
She watched me from this room, through this door.
She knew about the others.
No! No!
But she did.
Maria wouldn't do that!
Why wouldn't a beautiful, intelligent girl
be interested in what was happening in her house?
Just outside her house?
It would be absurd for her not to be interested.
All right, all right, listen.
Have the police been here?
Si, in this room.
Did they, uh, did they take anything?
No.
Look, i know this is a very difficult time.
But we have to, uh, figure out how this happened.
Now, why don't you two go to bed,
or if you can't go to bed, go to the kitchen.
And, if you will, i'd like to stay here
and have a look around and see if i can find something...
that might be helpful.
Vamos. Vamos, querido.
(speaking spanish)
Que es esto?
All right, mrs. Perez, (clears throat)
Do you have a dollar?
Why?
Because you are going to hire Nero Wolfe
to investigate the death of your daughter.
I am taking all of this back to his office.
Now, if the police find it,
they'll know about yeager and the room upstairs.
I'm not sure.
Well, i am sure.
And if you are not my client, then i am concealing evidence.
You were right before.
Well, i haven't earned any medals yet.
Okay, you are now a client.
Now, the police will almost certainly
be by here to ask questions.
Under no circumstances do you mention yeager, all right?
The man upstairs you've been making breakfast for?
Don't bother making breakfast anymore,
'cause i'm gonna send him home.
Now...
i'm gonna gather this stuff up,
bring it over to mr. Wolfe's office.
Uh, mrs. Perez, tell your huand we're friends.
Si, gracias.
(Archie) Ah, you know,
i've danced with that one once or twice at the flamingo.
Once or twice.
Yes.
Why are there no sketches of meg duncan?
Well, because she doesn't need one.
Name and face already attached.
"With all my love, meg."
So, when she saw a woman she did not know,
maria made a sketch.
Yes, and put a date on the sketch.
Julia mcgee was there last sunday.
Yes, there she is.
So, this julia mcgee either killed him,
or she found him dead.
Well, that would eliminate the Perez family.
Hey, i'm not crowing.
I wish i'd been wrong, then maria would still be alive.
That's mere conjecture.
No, no, no, no...
our theory is that whoever killed yeager killed maria...
or we haven't got a theory.
She saw the killer, made contact.
She wouldn't have done it for the hell of it,
se would've wanted to make a deal.
Okay, get Fred.
And miss mcgee.
How much do we owe Fred?
We are now out three "cs" on the yeager investigation
and have a total of $2 in retainers.
Fred received his instructions without a blink.
So there
i would like to be present when Wolfe tells him
to go to moscow and tail nikita kruschev.
(doorbell rings)
Ah, miss mcgee.
You've brought your boss.
Right this way.
Why did you send for miss mcgee?
I am your employer, you should notify me.
Fred? Yes, sir.
You wish to speak?
Yes, sir.
Last sunday, when i was covering
the house at 82nd street,
she came after dark and entered the building.
And why did you not speak of this on tuesday?
Well...
when i ran into her on tuesday,
it was a real tangle and...
remembered that, well, after
l-i didn't want to be a witness in a murder case.
So you withheld vital information
for 36 hours.
I'm sorry, sir, i know i let you down.
Just go to the front room and wait.
Im, just go to the miss mcgee? Nd wait. D you kill h
(aiken) Don't answer...
sir, i dare contrive a solution
that will satisfy the conditions of our contract
only by knowing the truth.
Miss mcgee!
(aiken) I am ordering you.
I didn't kill him.
I came in there and he was dead.
He was dead!
And what did you do?
Nothing, i just sat there and...
i don't know, after a few minutes, i left.
Did you tell anyone, anyone at all?
No.
Not mr. Aiken? No.
You said your loyalty should be to the corporation,
not mr. Yeager, when you betrayed him.
I didn't betray...
betray: Verb, second definition.
"To prove faithless to one who trusts."
I am still completely loyal...
t i am still there that night, pletely loyal...
not to take dictation,
i assume that you had decided to switch
back to mr. Yeager.
My loyalty has nothing to do with it, mr. Wolfe.
Mr. Yeager asked me to take dictation, and i did.
It's futile.
I'll learn nothing from you.
Sir, i don't think she killed him,
and i don't think you do.
You're only making things worse.
(clears throat) Wolfe!
Oh, uh, sorry, now, when he gets like this,
it's like we're not even here, see.
He can hear me.
No, no, he can't hear you,
he can't hear anything, anyone, no.
Miss mcgee, give me your keys.
What? Your keys!
Do you call this protecting the interests
of the corporation?
How the deuce did you get to be the president?
You spout, and you sputter,
and you say i have made it worse.
If i hadn't resorted to humbug,
we would not now know that mr. Yeager
was in that room when he was killed.
And i might have blundered fatally.
Humbug? What, what...
mr. Durkin was never at the house on sunday.
Oh! You tricky bastard.
I am now gravely compromised.
If i had my share of prudence
i would be on the telephone with inspector cramer.
Where were you last night from 9:00 to midnight?
That's none of your damn business.
Very well. Miss mcgee?
No, don't answer him, he's a liar and a blackmailer.
No, i want to...
i was having dinner with friends,
and i got home after midnight.
What exactly do you want, mr. Wolfe?
Es it matter? What exactly do you want, mr. Wolfe? What do
this is ridiculous!
Nice way to treat our one paying client.
You realize that we've...
never been so close to catastrophe and ignominy.
Yes, sir.
Now, it is imperative that we find the murderer
before mr. Cramer finds that room.
Hmm... errands?
Fred.
You will have lunch with us.
Get saul and orrie,
have them here by this afternoon.
And, uh, what about me?
Presumably that woman, meg duncan,
was at the theater last evening.
Well, presumably i can find out.
The play ends at eleven.
If she made a plan with maria Perez for 11:30,
she wouldn't have to rush to make it.
Instructions after you get saul and orrie.
(Wolfe) You've already made
your appointments, haven't you?
(Archie) Yes, but there's time.
My date with the actress is not for any particular minute.
Well, you, you'd better get going.
No, i want to stick around and provide the details.
Uh, no, we won't be needing you.
Well...
i could make some, uh,
pointed remarks right now, but, uh...
he occasionally shows remarkably good judgment.
She's got a headache, she can't see you.
I made an appointment.
Is that Archie Goodwin, matilda?
He says he is.
Send him in.
Well, you heard her, matilda,
. Send him in
well.
I haven't got a headache.
Sit here.
So...
where were you yesterday evening
between nine and midnight?
I wish i'd clawed your eyes out.
You've already used that line.
Did you ever see or speak to a maria Perez?
I don't know who that is.
She was murdered last night.
Now, she had a secret stash that she kept in her chest.
In it were three photographs of you.
One of them was signed.
O onsome money. As signed.
Nine $5 bills.
Oh my god, the money.
Yes, "oh my god, the money."
Do bills show fingerprints?
Certainly.
Now, let's get to why and when
you gave her the money.
Oh, uh, i don't remember.
Is that really important?
Because you know what i'd like to be talking about?
Actually, what i'd rather be doing right now is, uh...
yes... (clears throat)
The time, the place, the girl...
it's all a, uh... splendid combination,
but now is not the time and, uh,
besides, i'm not sure your motives are pure.
You have your hand on me.
Ah, yes, um...
it's a conditioned reflex.
It's a wonder that i didn't use both hands.
Now, about the money.
Ah, yes... the money.
About a year ago, she sent a note to my dressing room.
She signed it with her address.
Thataddress.
I asked her backstage.
At first she wanted theater tickets for her and her friends,
and then she decided she wanted hush money.
Well, that's what she called it.
Hush money?
$5 a month.
Have you seen her?
Aren't you
surprised? No, nothing surprises me.
She was so proud.
She was so beautiful, and, my god, so proud.
She told me about watching.
When she heard the street door open,
she'd turn out her light an the door a crack.
I knew she was doing it when i went there.
It gave me a feeling...
i don't know why.
It made it more exciting that she was looking.
Come a little closer.
Yes.
Do you like to watch?
I like to be watched.
Yeah... but watch out.
Me, i gotta go finish my chores.
Don't worry about your money.
Hush money is recoverable.
(Archie) I had no appointment
with mr. Or mrs. Austin hough,
because i preferred to have one of them alone.
But it didn't work out that way.
Did you find your wife yesterday?
What do you want?
Nothing startling.
You probably know about the murder
of a girl named maria Perez?
No, i haven't been out today.
Who was maria Perez?
Mr. Wolfe is wondering
how you spent your evening, and your wife's.
Balls.
Balls... is that by browning?
It sounds more elizabethan,
although i'm not up on elizabethans.
You want to know how my wife spent the evening.
Why don't you ask her?
Dinah...
the girl murdered last night,
what was her name?
Maria Perez.
Mr. Goodwin wants to know where you were last night.
I think you'd better tell him.
He saw you at that place yesterday,
and he might as well talk to you now.
Austin, no.
I told you yesterday
that i wanted her to know that i knew,
because i couldn't tell her.
I was afraid of what might happen.
Well, now it.
Tell him where you were last night.
Here.
I was here, austin.
And was i with you?
Yes.
Yes, austin.
You've seen her, now you can go.
Oh, no.
She's your wife, not mine.
But i would like to know if a doctor has seen her yet.
No.
No?
Do you want me to send for a doctor, mrs. Hough?
No.
I'm talking to her!
No.
Send her a bottle of champagne.
I was more interested in my next errand,
which was finding out how mrs. Yeager
spent the previous evening.
Inheriting widows of murdered men
always deserved attention.
(whistles)
Are we going somewhere?
Yes, you're gonna take me to see that room now,
the car is waiting.
No, no, not now.
No, it's not a good time.
You said you would take me as soon as you got the chance.
I tried to call you last night,
you weren't home.
I certainly was...
my son was here for dinner with his wife.
Now, come on.
Not now, not today.
I thought so.
There is no such room.
Yes, there's a room.
I've seen the room with my own eyes.
I don't believe you.
Benedict aiken invented it, or Nero Wolfe or you did.
You've been making a fool of me.
I'm gonna call the district attorney.
Oh, oh, oh, mrs. Yeager, just, please, if you will.
Now, you are looking into my eyes.
We are looking at each other.
Am i a liar?
Yes.
Okay, you're gonna have to see the room.
Okay, you're gonna have to see the room. Uffeur.
A taxl... we gotta cover our tracks.
I'm taking the chauffeur.
You can't take a chauffeur.
We're taking a taxi.
A dirty taxi?
We'll get a clean one.
Why do you think the person
that killed my husband killed that girl?
Uh, it's complicated, mrs. Yeager,
but it's not a guess.
Where's maria's mother?
I'm gonna speak to her.
Well, you better not, mrs. Yeager,
it's been a tough time for her.
She's taking this pretty hard.
I know how to talk to a mother.
(purley stebbins) Yeah, sorry to bother you
again, mrs. Perez.
We just got a few questions i need to ask.
Hope you don't mind, it won't take but two...
Goodwin, you? And mrs. Yeager, you?
Yeah, uh, Goodwin, you? Wolfe thought there might beeah,
a connection between the two murders, you know?
So, uh, you know, maria might have seen
whoever dumped the body down into the hole, there.
So, uh, but, you know, it's incred...
if you and Wolfe are starting to think alike,
that would be truly amazing, you could come work for us.
Yeah, yeah, yeah...
since when do you start yapping to me
about anything but the weather, Goodwin, huh?
Please, sergeant.
I want to thank you, mrs. Perez.
We've both lost someone very dear to us.
It's very kind of you to let us come today,
on a day like this.
I'll phone you later.
I told you the truth.
If my daughter saw anything on sunday,
she would have told me, and she didn't.
Uh-huh.
Did she go anywhere on sunday evening?
No, we always knew where she was.
Yeah, yeah.
Goodwin, we're going downtown.
Uhh, why? Am i under arrest?
Not yet.
Nice to have a choice.
Mrs. Yeager, uh, see you.
I'll see you later.
And, uh, mrs. Perez.
Come on.
It suited me fine to get stebbins out of that house.
I yawned as i got into the p.d. Car.
I'd needed a good yawn all day
but had been too busy to have one.
How long did they keep you?
I came home a little after one.
It must have been difficult.
It was, i had to keep a wall between two sets of facts:
The ones they know
and the ones we hope to god they'll never know.
Satisfactory.
Mrs. Yeager phoned and told me
of your impromptu explanation to mr. Stebbins.
She was impressed. Satisfactory.
Well, well.
Two "satisfactories" in one speech?
That's a record.
So, what's on the program?
Saul found what he was sent to find.
And mr. Aiken and miss mcgee will be here at 12:15.
This is the evidence which supports
the conjecture that whoever killed
mr. Yeager also killed maria Perez.
My conjecture is that miss Perez saw someone
whose name she knew
arrive shortly after mr. Yeager did on sunday evening,
and she undertook an ambitious venture in extortion.
There's a sketch here of you, julia.
Yes, and the fact that it is in this folder
makes it highl miss mcgee is the killer
because miss Perez sketched only those she did not know.
Miss Perez kept pictures of those she
and sketches of those she did not.
Are you familiar with this photograph?
Don't be preposterous!
Preposterous? Your face is here.
I understand from mrs. Yeager
that ever since mr. Yeager became vice president,
he has been an imminent threat to your leadership.
She would.
I have talked to others.
I don't have to listen to this.
I advise you to.
Clearly, julia might have told you of her appointment,
so you knew yeager would be there waiting.
The problem was the keys.
Did he ever ask you to
loan him yours, miss mcgee?
No.
I don't have to, no!
This is mr. Arthur wenger.
Mr. Wenger, do you recognize
this man who stands before you?
Of course. It's mr. Aiken.
He was in my shop one day last week
to get dupes made for a set of abloy keys.
How sure are you?
I couldn't be more sure.
You see, people are a lot like keys,
they look alike, but they're different.
I, i don't know faces as well as i know keys,
but i look at keys, and i look at faces.
An excellent habit, thank you, sir.
I got the receipt.
The mote in my eye, sir, was your avowed concern
for the reputation of your corporation.
It could hardly be reconciled with leaving the body
of its vice president to be found
on the floor in that room.
But envy and despair were at your innards,
and your need to disgrace him dominated you utterly.
I don't have to listen to this, i won't!
Will you risk prison for this man, miss mcgee?
Hold your tongue...
he's tricked you once before
and he'll do it again.
You're a fool. A bumbling, old fool.
If you had any brains at all, you'd...
yes, i lent him my keys,
and i told him i would be there sunday night,
so he knew mr. Yeager would be there.
I had promised to keepnformed.
Informed!
God, i was the fool.
"Fool" doesn't do you justice, madam.
Harpy or lamia, perhaps.
Phooey! Go!
My eyes are inured to ugliness, but you offend me.
Go!
So much for what is done.
Now what to do.
You are doomed, sir.
However, i would like to
satisfy the terms of my engagement
and protect the reputation of your corporation.
I doubt much if you care at this point,
but to that end, i have prepared this document
which i suggest that you copy
in your own handwriting and sign.
Even if you were not convicted, the trial, the exposure...
shut up!
"I, benedict aiken, killed thomas yeager
"because he threatened my control of the corporation
had labored years "because he threatened my contto build..." yes! Ation
"i shot him in the head
"and transported his body to a construction site
"on 82nd street
"and covered it with a tarp to postpone its discovery.
"I feel he deserved to die,
and i express no remorse for my deed."
"I feel he deserved to die,
"and i express no remorse for my deed...
benedict aiken."
When was the body found, Archie?
Thursday afternoon by the maid.
He mailed that letter, then he went home,
then he shot himself.
Gentlemen of the board of continental plastics,
if this affair had been left to the police
there would have been a trial.
The existence of that room
would have been bruted about in the press,
and mr. Aiken would have been,
instead of the subject of a brief sensation,
the center of a prolonged hullabaloo.
Do you question my assessment
of my services at $50,000?
I don't.
No, we don't question that.
We can't.
Would a certified check be adequate?
I'd prefer cash.
You shall have it, then.
I owe you a fee, too.
Oh, i have your dollar, i'll keep that.
You may have copies of mr. Aiken's statement.
They're cheap at that price.
I... must excuse myself.
I have a prior engagement.
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