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Previously on Californication:
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00:00:13,847 --> 00:00:15,337
You'd seriously pay...?
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A million dollars
to be inside of you again.
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00:00:17,951 --> 00:00:19,612
- That is fucked up.
- I know.
5
00:00:19,786 --> 00:00:23,517
- You're not gonna do it, are you?
- I don't know. We could use the cash.
6
00:00:23,690 --> 00:00:25,317
I'm on my way. How about you?
7
00:00:25,492 --> 00:00:27,084
I will be, shortly.
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Thirty minutes or less.
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00:00:28,595 --> 00:00:31,223
Oh, Hank. I don't wanna wait
for what already promises...
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00:00:31,398 --> 00:00:33,389
...to be a pretty unpleasant
conversation.
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I just gotta see you smile
before you go home, okay? One time?
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I can't make any promises.
13
00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:42,305
- Drink with Karen? What's that about?
- E*verything's so crazy right now.
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I don't feel like I can make the right move
to save my life. She centers me.
15
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Shut up and listen to me.
16
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I gotta try to get through this
without crying.
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I'm at the hospital.
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Karen was in a car accident.
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What the fuck is wrong with me?
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- Why couldn't I have been on time?
- Don't blame yourself, Hanky.
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Why not? She was going to meet me.
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Yeah. The guy was drunk.
He came out of nowhere.
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It could've happened anytime,
anyplace.
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Know how many times
I've driven around Venice fucked up?
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It could've been me behind the wheel.
26
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Yeah, maybe so.
But that shit doesn't matter now.
27
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This is where we are.
She's gonna be okay.
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You don't know that.
29
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- How is she?
- Some fucking drunk broadsided her.
30
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She got pretty knocked around.
31
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She's in and out of consciousness.
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00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:19,003
And there might be
some internal bleeding.
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00:02:20,373 --> 00:02:23,399
- What can I do?
- You can stop crying, for one.
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I can do that.
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I'm doing that...
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...right now.
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Okay, and you maybe could
donate some blood.
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She may need some.
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00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:39,485
Is there something else I can do?
40
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Historically, I've been known to get woozy
when it comes to the giving of blood.
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Maybe I won't be the right type.
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I'm not a fucking pincushion, woman.
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I didn't go in yet.
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Really? You gotta be kidding me.
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Seemed like I felt every inch
of that going in.
46
00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:05,007
Now. Now it's going in.
47
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Sensitive one, ain't you?
48
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He's a fucking ninny, is what he is.
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00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:16,924
Woman's a fucking butcher, Hank.
50
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Hey, how you doing, buddy?
You hanging in there?
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Because I'm here to help.
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I feel a little woozy though.
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You know, fuck this.
54
00:03:43,656 --> 00:03:45,647
Fuck, Karen, what are you doing?
55
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Why are you being
such an asshole about this?
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00:03:48,061 --> 00:03:50,962
I'm actually trying very hard
to be the opposite of an asshole.
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You know what?
You're not doing a very good job.
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You're the one who brought up
me being an asshole.
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Well, because you're making it so
obvious that you don't wanna go.
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Oh, really? How can you tell? Is it
because I've said it out loud many times?
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00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,268
Yet here I am,
going where I don't wanna go.
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Don't do me any favors, okay?
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00:04:06,946 --> 00:04:09,210
It's just our entire
fucking future at stake.
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00:04:09,382 --> 00:04:11,111
Jesus Christ, with the drama, Karen.
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Know how many times
I've had to reschedule this?
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00:04:13,853 --> 00:04:16,287
Know how many times
I've put my fist through a wall?
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I lost count. But you could ask Becca.
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Nice. Bring Becca into it.
69
00:04:20,493 --> 00:04:23,360
Why shouldn't I? Isn't she
the most important part of this?
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00:04:23,529 --> 00:04:25,656
Isn't she the reason
we should try to fix this?
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00:04:25,832 --> 00:04:28,062
Don't fuck with my shit, woman.
72
00:04:31,170 --> 00:04:33,365
Have I always been such an asshole?
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Different varieties of asshole.
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Some more pernicious than others.
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What the fuck happened to us?
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- What do you mean?
- We were always... We were so great.
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You know, we'd go out to dinner
every other night.
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00:04:50,623 --> 00:04:53,421
I could've sworn
we were gonna grow old together.
79
00:04:54,260 --> 00:04:56,091
And now look at us.
80
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We're still together.
81
00:04:57,997 --> 00:05:00,124
Yeah.
Yeah, you guys are really together.
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00:05:01,234 --> 00:05:05,637
You're contemplating letting the love
of your life fuck some other guy for profit.
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00:05:05,805 --> 00:05:08,797
Hey, Marcy's her own woman, Hank.
I can't tell her what to do.
84
00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:11,603
Yeah, you can.
You can fight against that shit, Runks.
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00:05:11,778 --> 00:05:14,838
Why did you tell him about Stu's offer?
Is nothing private, Runkle?
86
00:05:15,014 --> 00:05:17,676
He's my best friend.
I needed his counsel.
87
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:20,312
It's a unique situation.
You didn't tell Karen?
88
00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:23,683
No. She would totally frown
upon that shit.
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00:05:23,856 --> 00:05:28,293
Right. She would. Because she's a sane
and responsible adult.
90
00:05:28,461 --> 00:05:30,224
She always had a way of centering us.
91
00:05:30,396 --> 00:05:33,695
She's the best thing that happened
to me, and I fucked it up again.
92
00:05:33,866 --> 00:05:35,834
- Hank.
- No, it's true, Marcy.
93
00:05:36,536 --> 00:05:40,495
You know, instead of celebrating the fact
that I was the luckiest guy on earth...
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00:05:41,474 --> 00:05:44,341
...I pushed her away,
figured there'd be time to work it out.
95
00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:46,375
- There is time.
- No, what if there isn't?
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00:05:46,546 --> 00:05:49,071
What if this is it?
What if we ran out of time?
97
00:05:51,818 --> 00:05:54,378
You can't go through
with this Stu thing.
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You'll never get over it.
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00:05:57,423 --> 00:05:59,550
There's some things
you should never get over.
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That him?
101
00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:18,806
- Hank.
- "Hank," what? It's a simple question.
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Save it for in there.
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Can't believe I let you talk me
into humiliating myself like this.
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I'm out of here.
105
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Hey, guys.
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Welcome.
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Hi.
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Let's dive in, shall we?
109
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- Yeah.
- What brings you to me?
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She's having an affair.
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- Diving right in, indeed.
- Jesus, Hank.
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That's why we're here, right?
113
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To cut through the bullshit,
get to the heart of the matter?
114
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That's not the heart of the matter.
115
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It's the heart of the matter to me.
It's what matters to my heart.
116
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- It's the heart of my matter.
- Karen's right, Hank.
117
00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:04,416
Why did I know you were gonna
side with her immediately?
118
00:07:04,590 --> 00:07:06,581
No, no, no. No sides here.
119
00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:11,992
I'm just suggesting that affairs are
typically a symptom of a larger problem.
120
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Really? Well, it seems like a pretty big
fucking problem in and of itself to me.
121
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So let's hear from Karen.
122
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Are you having an affair, Karen?
123
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No, I wouldn't call it that.
124
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How would you describe it?
125
00:07:28,681 --> 00:07:30,945
- He's a friend.
- An emotional friend?
126
00:07:31,517 --> 00:07:34,884
- I suppose.
- Holy shit, Karen. An emotional friend?
127
00:07:35,421 --> 00:07:36,683
I want an emotional friend.
128
00:07:36,856 --> 00:07:39,518
- Where do I get an emotional friend?
- You had one.
129
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Have you made love with him?
130
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:46,322
No.
131
00:07:46,499 --> 00:07:48,490
But you've considered it?
132
00:07:51,204 --> 00:07:53,798
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna punch a wall.
133
00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,804
What's the sex like between you?
134
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:57,875
- Infrequent.
- Nonexistent.
135
00:07:58,044 --> 00:08:00,638
Hank, why do you think...
136
00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:05,182
...Karen has developed
an emotional bond with another man?
137
00:08:06,219 --> 00:08:09,188
Maybe because the guy in question is...
138
00:08:09,355 --> 00:08:12,791
Is Bill his name, is...? Fucking dial tone.
139
00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:15,086
He thinks she's hot,
and he wants to fuck her.
140
00:08:15,261 --> 00:08:18,389
So he pretends to be interested
in everything she's interested in...
141
00:08:18,564 --> 00:08:21,226
...so he can get into her knickers,
which works, trust me.
142
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:24,460
- It's really hard to have a conversation...
- With Karen, it works.
143
00:08:24,637 --> 00:08:27,435
...with someone who drinks himself
into a stupor every night.
144
00:08:27,607 --> 00:08:30,872
- I don't see what's wrong with a nightcap.
- Are you a big drinker?
145
00:08:31,043 --> 00:08:32,704
What? Is this an intervention?
146
00:08:32,879 --> 00:08:34,904
Do you consider yourself an alcoholic?
147
00:08:35,715 --> 00:08:38,411
I thought we were here
to talk about her emotional friend.
148
00:08:38,584 --> 00:08:42,384
- And all we're doing is talking about me.
- What are you willing to change?
149
00:08:42,555 --> 00:08:44,648
- Why is this all about me?
- It's not.
150
00:08:44,824 --> 00:08:47,384
You just seem the most defensive
at the moment.
151
00:08:47,560 --> 00:08:50,222
Oh, don't smirk, Karen.
It's unbecoming.
152
00:08:50,396 --> 00:08:54,492
You know what's really unbecoming?
Is the fact that we don't talk anymore.
153
00:08:54,667 --> 00:08:56,828
The fact that you bury yourself
in your work...
154
00:08:57,003 --> 00:09:00,200
...and you go out every night,
drinking and flirting.
155
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:02,432
- Karen.
- You come home totally wasted.
156
00:09:02,608 --> 00:09:04,200
You never, ever see your daughter.
157
00:09:04,377 --> 00:09:06,277
- I have a movie in production.
- You are...
158
00:09:06,445 --> 00:09:08,345
- It's a big fucking deal.
- So what?
159
00:09:08,514 --> 00:09:11,142
Some significant others
would be proud of that.
160
00:09:11,317 --> 00:09:13,217
I'm proud of that.
That's not the problem.
161
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:15,820
You show your pride
by finding an emotional friend.
162
00:09:15,988 --> 00:09:19,651
And you seem to want to take advantage
of your newfound station in life.
163
00:09:19,825 --> 00:09:22,020
And you resent having
a ball and chain at home.
164
00:09:22,194 --> 00:09:24,628
I don't speak like that.
I've never put it that way.
165
00:09:24,797 --> 00:09:26,492
- That's what you think.
- No, I don't.
166
00:09:26,666 --> 00:09:29,226
Do I cross paths with attractive women?
Yes.
167
00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:31,927
Do I flirt with them? I suppose.
168
00:09:32,104 --> 00:09:34,902
- Do I wanna fuck them? Yes.
- Right?
169
00:09:35,074 --> 00:09:37,599
Welcome to the wonderful world
of being a fucking guy.
170
00:09:37,777 --> 00:09:39,005
Why is it a guy thing?
171
00:09:39,178 --> 00:09:42,045
But I don't walk around trying
to make them emotional friends.
172
00:09:42,214 --> 00:09:44,546
Or considering actually fucking them
all day long.
173
00:09:44,717 --> 00:09:45,911
- You just sa...
- Actually...
174
00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:48,383
Jesus Christ, that is so gross.
175
00:09:48,554 --> 00:09:52,183
I wanna punch myself in the dick.
But I'm not going to.
176
00:09:52,358 --> 00:09:54,690
Because that would be inappropriate.
177
00:10:00,566 --> 00:10:03,592
Hey, hey, hey. Hey, man.
It's only a dollar, man.
178
00:10:03,769 --> 00:10:07,170
I'll give you another one, you know?
Knock it off. You know, try again.
179
00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:09,467
You don't even have to pay me back.
180
00:10:09,642 --> 00:10:11,542
Sorry. I don't know what came over me.
181
00:10:11,711 --> 00:10:13,770
Hey, you know, it's okay, I get it.
182
00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:16,676
I've done it myself many times.
183
00:10:17,049 --> 00:10:19,279
Maybe not so much swearing, though.
184
00:10:20,386 --> 00:10:21,614
Yeah.
185
00:10:21,787 --> 00:10:24,654
- Are you waiting on some news?
- Yeah. You?
186
00:10:25,157 --> 00:10:27,284
Yeah, yeah, man. You bet.
187
00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:31,487
My wife, she's in surgery. Cancer.
188
00:10:31,797 --> 00:10:34,857
We've seen the inside of this place a lot
the last couple of years.
189
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:39,199
I'm sorry.
My lady's back there too, somewhere.
190
00:10:40,039 --> 00:10:42,166
Well, they say
waiting is the hardest part.
191
00:10:42,341 --> 00:10:45,833
Truer words have never been spoken,
or sung.
192
00:10:46,012 --> 00:10:48,606
- How long you been married?
- Not married.
193
00:10:48,781 --> 00:10:52,114
Just together on and off
for forever, really.
194
00:10:52,284 --> 00:10:55,151
We weren't on the best of terms
when this happened.
195
00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:57,846
Hey, man, I've been married 44 years.
196
00:10:58,024 --> 00:11:00,219
You're not always gonna be
on the best of terms.
197
00:11:00,393 --> 00:11:01,883
Forty-four years.
198
00:11:02,061 --> 00:11:03,085
Well done, sir.
199
00:11:03,262 --> 00:11:05,355
You know... Well, you know, it takes time.
200
00:11:05,531 --> 00:11:08,159
But once you get on the other side
of all the bullshit...
201
00:11:08,334 --> 00:11:12,134
...you realize that this is what
it's all about all along.
202
00:11:12,304 --> 00:11:14,397
You know, having a friend
to hold your hand...
203
00:11:14,573 --> 00:11:16,302
...while life kicks you in the ass...
204
00:11:16,475 --> 00:11:19,171
...and reminds you that
that body of yours is just on loan.
205
00:11:21,113 --> 00:11:24,139
Yeah, sometimes you see things
really clearly...
206
00:11:24,316 --> 00:11:26,181
...and then just... It gets cloudy again.
207
00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:27,649
Hey, well, that's life, kid.
208
00:11:27,820 --> 00:11:30,550
I mean, if it was easy,
we wouldn't never fuck up.
209
00:11:30,723 --> 00:11:33,385
We wouldn't have any regrets,
we'd have perfect kids...
210
00:11:33,559 --> 00:11:36,187
...and we'd spend every second
of every day being happy.
211
00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:37,886
Now, you know anybody like that?
212
00:11:38,064 --> 00:11:40,692
No, because I sure the hell don't.
213
00:11:40,866 --> 00:11:42,731
You know,
you take it easy on this thing.
214
00:11:56,949 --> 00:11:59,179
A boy called me "weird" today.
215
00:11:59,351 --> 00:12:00,648
You are weird.
216
00:12:00,820 --> 00:12:03,448
- Bad weird?
- Beautiful weird.
217
00:12:03,622 --> 00:12:06,750
And I will totally kick that boy's butt
if you want me to.
218
00:12:06,926 --> 00:12:08,257
No.
219
00:12:08,427 --> 00:12:10,054
- He's kind of cute.
- Gross.
220
00:12:10,229 --> 00:12:12,629
You are way too young
to say such things.
221
00:12:12,798 --> 00:12:15,665
It seems like boys and girls
make the world go round.
222
00:12:15,968 --> 00:12:19,096
Not only are you beautiful weird,
but you're also wicked smart.
223
00:12:20,005 --> 00:12:23,031
I've made a pretty decent living
writing about boys and girls.
224
00:12:23,209 --> 00:12:25,177
Speaking of boys and girls...
225
00:12:25,344 --> 00:12:26,709
Yes?
226
00:12:26,879 --> 00:12:29,006
Are you and Mom
going to get a divorce?
227
00:12:29,181 --> 00:12:31,843
How can we get divorced?
We're not even married.
228
00:12:32,017 --> 00:12:33,848
- You know what I mean.
- I do.
229
00:12:34,019 --> 00:12:35,611
Not if I can help it, baby girl.
230
00:12:36,388 --> 00:12:38,151
- You can help it.
- Yeah?
231
00:12:38,324 --> 00:12:41,725
- By not fighting so much.
- I know. I'm sorry.
232
00:12:42,027 --> 00:12:43,255
But it's weird...
233
00:12:43,429 --> 00:12:47,695
...other times you guys seem like you
really love each other, like in the movies.
234
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:49,924
It's not like in the movies.
235
00:12:50,469 --> 00:12:52,027
What about TV?
236
00:12:52,204 --> 00:12:54,900
No, not TV or movies.
237
00:12:55,074 --> 00:12:57,907
Mommies and daddies have
their work cut out for them.
238
00:12:58,077 --> 00:13:00,375
I don't see why it's so hard.
239
00:13:00,546 --> 00:13:02,241
I'm glad you don't.
240
00:13:02,414 --> 00:13:04,439
You got plenty of time
to learn that lesson.
241
00:13:05,551 --> 00:13:08,714
I don't understand why you guys
get so mad at each other.
242
00:13:08,888 --> 00:13:11,550
How many times are you going
to punch the wall?
243
00:13:14,927 --> 00:13:16,485
I'm not gonna do that anymore.
244
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:19,693
- You promise?
- Promise.
245
00:13:19,865 --> 00:13:21,389
You know why else?
246
00:13:21,567 --> 00:13:23,831
Because it really hurts.
247
00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:26,995
Race you home?
248
00:13:27,173 --> 00:13:28,197
Race you home.
249
00:13:41,587 --> 00:13:42,884
Poor Hanky.
250
00:13:43,722 --> 00:13:46,213
This really puts it
all in perspective, huh?
251
00:13:46,392 --> 00:13:48,053
How do you mean?
252
00:13:49,361 --> 00:13:52,853
We've been obsessed
with all the wrong stuff.
253
00:13:53,465 --> 00:13:58,061
You know, the only thing that matters
is that you're healthy...
254
00:13:58,237 --> 00:14:02,901
...you're okay, and you're right here
next to me right now.
255
00:14:04,810 --> 00:14:06,334
You're right, Runks.
256
00:14:06,512 --> 00:14:09,572
But we gotta go home sometime,
and we're still gonna need money.
257
00:14:09,748 --> 00:14:13,616
- You know what I mean?
- There has got to be a better way.
258
00:14:13,786 --> 00:14:15,583
And we'll find it, I promise.
259
00:14:17,089 --> 00:14:18,556
Okay.
260
00:14:18,724 --> 00:14:20,351
Yeah.
261
00:14:22,061 --> 00:14:25,895
This kind of thing does put everything
into perspective. I mean...
262
00:14:26,065 --> 00:14:30,434
...why the fuck do we make
such a big deal out of sex?
263
00:14:30,603 --> 00:14:32,935
If that was you in there,
I wouldn't give a shit...
264
00:14:33,105 --> 00:14:36,165
...if you spanked your secretary
or fucked the nanny.
265
00:14:36,342 --> 00:14:37,775
It all just melts away.
266
00:14:37,943 --> 00:14:40,571
I only care that you're okay.
267
00:14:40,746 --> 00:14:42,714
Do you know what I mean?
268
00:14:43,382 --> 00:14:44,610
Yeah.
269
00:14:44,783 --> 00:14:46,751
I mean, if I had been
more understanding...
270
00:14:46,919 --> 00:14:49,444
...of the fact that you got some
serious kink in you...
271
00:14:49,622 --> 00:14:52,819
...then we never would've fallen down
this rabbit hole to begin with.
272
00:14:52,992 --> 00:14:56,428
Yeah, yeah. But I should've been able
to control myself.
273
00:14:56,595 --> 00:14:59,723
Yeah, but like it or not,
it's just the way we're wired.
274
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:03,426
If some hot, young thing
asks you to spank her...
275
00:15:03,602 --> 00:15:05,297
...you're gonna get a fucking boner.
276
00:15:05,471 --> 00:15:09,737
You're gonna fucking jerk off to it.
It is just the law of the fucking jungle.
277
00:15:11,677 --> 00:15:14,805
I really hate that you're making
so much sense right now.
278
00:15:14,980 --> 00:15:17,676
I know. It's so annoying, right?
279
00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:21,650
I mean, like, if Stu texted me a picture
of his ween right now...
280
00:15:21,820 --> 00:15:25,688
...I'd probably get a little wet.
But that is purely out of reflex.
281
00:15:25,858 --> 00:15:27,086
I didn't need that, Marcy.
282
00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:30,321
But it's true, right?
283
00:15:30,496 --> 00:15:35,160
I mean, we all have things
that trigger our arousal...
284
00:15:35,334 --> 00:15:40,567
...and if we just acknowledge them
as normal and not deny them...
285
00:15:40,739 --> 00:15:45,335
...then we could just move
the fuck on with our lives.
286
00:15:45,511 --> 00:15:47,342
Oh, Jesus, Runkle.
287
00:15:47,513 --> 00:15:48,537
Look alive, Runks.
288
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:17,765
Well, that was...
That was a really positive experience.
289
00:16:17,943 --> 00:16:20,343
I feel good about the state
of our relationship now.
290
00:16:20,512 --> 00:16:22,571
Says the guy who put his fist
through a wall.
291
00:16:22,748 --> 00:16:24,079
Do not be changing my shit.
292
00:16:24,249 --> 00:16:27,241
- Oh, Hank, don't be such a child.
- Don't be such a fucking nag.
293
00:16:27,419 --> 00:16:30,388
You know what?
Don't put me in that box, okay?
294
00:16:30,556 --> 00:16:34,652
Just because you refuse to grow up,
it does not turn me into a nag.
295
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:36,920
God, Hank, you're so fucking selfish.
296
00:16:37,096 --> 00:16:39,621
I mean, everything revolves around you,
you know?
297
00:16:39,798 --> 00:16:42,562
It's all about what you will do,
what you won't do. It's...
298
00:16:42,735 --> 00:16:45,795
This is your life, and we're just
all these supporting characters.
299
00:16:45,971 --> 00:16:48,906
And look who's giving
the performance of a lifetime right now.
300
00:16:49,074 --> 00:16:52,043
I don't want to do this anymore.
It's so fucking miserable.
301
00:16:52,211 --> 00:16:54,111
- Let's go!
- It is fucking miserable.
302
00:17:05,791 --> 00:17:07,418
Fuck me.
303
00:17:23,842 --> 00:17:25,332
- You okay?
- I'm fine.
304
00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:28,344
- Sorry about that.
- Me too.
305
00:17:28,981 --> 00:17:31,006
We could've fucking died back there,
Karen.
306
00:17:31,183 --> 00:17:34,448
- Pretty much.
- Because of your taste in music.
307
00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:39,452
We weren't fighting over music, Hank.
308
00:17:39,625 --> 00:17:44,289
I know, but it just all seems so silly now.
All of it.
309
00:17:44,463 --> 00:17:45,896
I know.
310
00:17:47,699 --> 00:17:50,133
Where did we go wrong?
We were perfect once.
311
00:17:50,302 --> 00:17:51,496
I would swear to that.
312
00:17:52,371 --> 00:17:54,430
We've been in it a while.
We have a child.
313
00:17:54,606 --> 00:17:56,301
We're not special.
314
00:17:56,475 --> 00:17:58,443
I mean,
I know your writer's brain wants...
315
00:17:58,610 --> 00:18:01,909
...to make us into some love story
of the ages or something.
316
00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:03,673
- Because we are.
- Maybe, maybe.
317
00:18:03,849 --> 00:18:07,945
But we still need to work at it, you know,
just like the rest of the world.
318
00:18:08,120 --> 00:18:10,213
It's not gonna figure itself out.
319
00:18:11,590 --> 00:18:13,114
We need to...
320
00:18:13,892 --> 00:18:17,225
I don't know. It's been a long time
since it was just about fiery sex.
321
00:18:17,396 --> 00:18:18,761
Yeah.
322
00:18:19,064 --> 00:18:21,532
It was never just about fiery sex, Karen.
323
00:18:25,637 --> 00:18:27,969
The sex was pretty fiery, though,
wasn't it?
324
00:18:28,140 --> 00:18:30,768
- I don't wanna talk about sex.
- I kind of do.
325
00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:33,377
Isn't that what we're talking about,
is a compromise?
326
00:18:33,545 --> 00:18:36,343
- Shut up.
- And kiss you? Done.
327
00:18:36,515 --> 00:18:38,483
Done.
328
00:18:44,590 --> 00:18:46,114
Help.
329
00:19:38,343 --> 00:19:41,369
- Hello.
- Hi. Sister?
330
00:19:41,847 --> 00:19:43,212
What brings you in?
331
00:19:43,382 --> 00:19:45,782
My wife was in a car accident.
332
00:19:45,951 --> 00:19:47,145
I'm very sorry.
333
00:19:47,319 --> 00:19:48,911
Is she going to be okay?
334
00:19:49,788 --> 00:19:52,450
Don't know, now.
335
00:19:52,624 --> 00:19:55,092
Are you a religious person?
336
00:19:55,260 --> 00:19:57,387
Not really, which is weird...
337
00:19:57,563 --> 00:20:00,430
...because I often dream
about being in a place like this.
338
00:20:00,599 --> 00:20:03,033
But in real life, not so much.
339
00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:06,303
Is there anything I can do for you?
340
00:20:06,471 --> 00:20:08,200
Would you like to talk?
341
00:20:08,373 --> 00:20:09,533
No, I'm good.
342
00:20:09,708 --> 00:20:13,041
I was just kind of looking
for a new place to sit and wait.
343
00:20:14,012 --> 00:20:16,071
Are you of any particular faith?
344
00:20:17,249 --> 00:20:18,773
I'm a writer.
345
00:20:18,951 --> 00:20:21,215
So I believe in sitting down,
shutting my eyes...
346
00:20:21,386 --> 00:20:22,717
...and hoping for the best.
347
00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:26,449
But beyond that, l... Not really, no.
348
00:20:26,625 --> 00:20:29,822
Well, that sounds like a pretty good
definition of prayer to me.
349
00:20:29,995 --> 00:20:33,226
I don't think the man upstairs would
be interested in hearing from me.
350
00:20:33,398 --> 00:20:36,162
I've been a particularly wayward son.
351
00:20:36,335 --> 00:20:37,393
E*veryone says that.
352
00:20:37,569 --> 00:20:39,662
No, no, no. I'm a blasphemous mess.
353
00:20:39,838 --> 00:20:43,467
If there's a top ten most-unwanted list
up there...
354
00:20:43,642 --> 00:20:45,405
...I could very well be on it.
355
00:20:45,577 --> 00:20:49,980
Maybe so. But right now you just seem
like a man who loves his wife.
356
00:20:51,717 --> 00:20:53,184
I do.
357
00:20:53,685 --> 00:20:55,482
I really do.
358
00:20:55,954 --> 00:20:59,014
I mean, we're not even married.
You know, we live in sin.
359
00:21:00,025 --> 00:21:03,927
We had a child together, broke up,
got back together, broke up...
360
00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:05,757
...lather, rinse, repeat, you know?
361
00:21:05,931 --> 00:21:09,833
- You really are a wayward son.
- Told you.
362
00:21:10,002 --> 00:21:12,470
You're very pleasant, sister.
363
00:21:12,638 --> 00:21:13,798
Very agreeable.
364
00:21:14,473 --> 00:21:16,703
Yeah. Sit.
365
00:21:16,875 --> 00:21:18,240
Close your eyes.
366
00:21:18,410 --> 00:21:19,877
Hope for the best.
367
00:21:38,397 --> 00:21:41,423
That's what I'm talking about.
368
00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:43,431
We just made the fuck, woman.
369
00:21:43,602 --> 00:21:45,160
No, I'm gonna amend that.
370
00:21:45,337 --> 00:21:48,568
I'm gonna go out on a limb
and say we made some love.
371
00:21:48,740 --> 00:21:52,540
And you know how much
I hate that phrase. But we made that shit.
372
00:21:52,711 --> 00:21:57,671
We made that shit right here in our own
little private Idaho of sin and sex juices...
373
00:21:57,849 --> 00:21:59,339
Okay, have you finished?
374
00:21:59,518 --> 00:22:02,419
I could go on for hours. I've just started.
375
00:22:03,522 --> 00:22:05,183
Do you think it's possible?
376
00:22:05,357 --> 00:22:10,727
To go again? Yeah.
Just give me five minutes. Or four.
377
00:22:10,896 --> 00:22:12,955
No, actually, I'm ready to go now.
Let's do...
378
00:22:13,131 --> 00:22:19,331
No, no, no. Do you think it's possible,
you know, happily ever after?
379
00:22:19,905 --> 00:22:23,102
Yeah, baby. I just think...
380
00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:28,905
...we gotta bottle this feeling and bust it
out every time things get a little cloudy.
381
00:22:29,748 --> 00:22:31,613
Yeah, because that really works, right?
382
00:22:31,783 --> 00:22:36,550
Couples who have great sex,
they always make it to the finish line.
383
00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:40,215
- Do they?
- We're gonna make it, Karen.
384
00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:42,084
How do you know?
385
00:22:44,196 --> 00:22:45,686
Because I love you to death.
386
00:22:46,732 --> 00:22:49,360
- Really?
- I'm sure of that.
387
00:22:52,437 --> 00:22:53,870
I love you too.
388
00:22:58,210 --> 00:22:59,734
Come here.
389
00:23:05,684 --> 00:23:07,584
You ready?
390
00:23:07,753 --> 00:23:09,186
Yes.
391
00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:16,953
- E*xcuse me, doctor?
- Yeah, in a minute.
392
00:23:17,662 --> 00:23:19,152
Hey, hey.
393
00:23:22,701 --> 00:23:23,827
She has a concussion.
394
00:23:24,002 --> 00:23:25,435
Oh, Jesus.
395
00:23:25,604 --> 00:23:27,162
But there's no internal bleeding.
396
00:23:27,639 --> 00:23:30,039
She'll be here for a couple days...
397
00:23:30,208 --> 00:23:31,675
...but she's a very lucky girl.
398
00:23:32,144 --> 00:23:33,873
Oh, my God.
399
00:23:34,045 --> 00:23:35,171
Thank God.
400
00:23:35,347 --> 00:23:36,837
- Thank God.
- Can we see her?
401
00:23:37,015 --> 00:23:39,347
One of you can go back.
Are you the husband?
402
00:23:40,852 --> 00:23:43,548
Yes. Yes, he's the fucking husband.
403
00:23:43,722 --> 00:23:46,190
Go see your fucking wife.
404
00:23:46,358 --> 00:23:47,985
This way.
405
00:23:50,262 --> 00:23:52,127
Oh, my God.
406
00:23:52,297 --> 00:23:53,764
Honey.
407
00:23:58,603 --> 00:24:01,299
- No. Not here.
- Not here? Okay. Okay.
408
00:24:32,137 --> 00:24:34,901
This doesn't change anything,
you know?
409
00:24:35,707 --> 00:24:37,732
I'm still pissed at you.
410
00:24:39,044 --> 00:24:41,308
I wouldn't have it any other way.
411
00:25:11,977 --> 00:25:14,673
- Hey, baby.
- Hello, sir.
412
00:25:14,846 --> 00:25:16,245
Finally.
413
00:25:16,414 --> 00:25:19,679
- I interviewed a new assistant today.
- What was wrong with the old one?
414
00:25:19,851 --> 00:25:23,048
Well, the agency caught him
looking at porn on the computer.
415
00:25:23,221 --> 00:25:25,121
- Oh, gross.
- Oh, is that a crime now?
416
00:25:25,290 --> 00:25:28,259
Maybe they were afraid he was
beating off at work. I don't know.
417
00:25:28,426 --> 00:25:30,917
Oh, that's fucking foul, Charlie.
418
00:25:31,096 --> 00:25:33,860
Jerking off at work.
Save that shit for the shower.
419
00:25:34,032 --> 00:25:37,195
I do not like to stand up
and masturbate.
420
00:25:37,636 --> 00:25:39,695
Seeing my belly,
it takes me out of the game.
421
00:25:39,871 --> 00:25:43,534
Seeing your great white underbelly
would take me out of the game too.
422
00:25:43,708 --> 00:25:45,471
It's understandable.
423
00:25:45,644 --> 00:25:47,874
And yet, I love to sit down when I pee.
424
00:25:48,046 --> 00:25:52,142
- What do you think about that, Karen?
- Hey, hey. Guy or girl assistant?
425
00:25:52,317 --> 00:25:53,648
Girl.
426
00:25:53,818 --> 00:25:56,616
She's got funky hair, Hank.
And tattoos all over.
427
00:25:56,788 --> 00:25:59,222
Hey, hey, hey, you be careful, Runks.
428
00:25:59,391 --> 00:26:01,416
Don't go dipping your helmet
into that shit.
429
00:26:01,593 --> 00:26:05,893
I'll bite it off. Trust me, I will. And you
can't afford to lose an inch off that thing.
430
00:26:06,064 --> 00:26:08,464
I trust you, Marcella.
431
00:26:08,633 --> 00:26:09,895
Okay.
432
00:26:10,068 --> 00:26:13,060
Hey, we've been trying to get you
guys out on the town for weeks.
433
00:26:13,238 --> 00:26:15,399
What gives? Why now? Why?
434
00:26:15,574 --> 00:26:17,701
Hello? Hello?
435
00:26:18,443 --> 00:26:22,140
Nothing. Just some days
you see everything clearly.
436
00:26:22,314 --> 00:26:26,546
We almost died today. And then we went
home and fucked each other's brains out.
437
00:26:26,718 --> 00:26:29,209
Which put us in a pretty good mood.
438
00:26:29,387 --> 00:26:30,479
And gave us an appetite.
439
00:26:31,256 --> 00:26:33,121
How many times a week
do you guys fuck?
440
00:26:33,291 --> 00:26:35,225
Because Runks and I
are starting to slump.
441
00:26:35,393 --> 00:26:38,260
- Hey, now.
- What? It's true.
442
00:26:38,430 --> 00:26:41,456
You don't think I'm starting
to go through the change, do you?
443
00:26:41,633 --> 00:26:43,931
- Because I still get really wet.
- Starting?
444
00:26:44,102 --> 00:26:46,696
Yes, you do. I think that's what
makes me pop so fast.
445
00:26:46,871 --> 00:26:50,534
You see, this is why we don't go out,
because every time we do...
446
00:26:50,709 --> 00:26:53,507
...Charlie says something
that makes me throw up in my mouth.
447
00:26:53,678 --> 00:26:55,475
She started it.
448
00:26:55,647 --> 00:26:58,844
Hey, well, try living with that shit.
Try living with that shit.
449
00:26:59,017 --> 00:27:00,041
I didn't.
450
00:27:00,218 --> 00:27:02,652
Hey, you think we'll be doing this
years from now?
451
00:27:02,821 --> 00:27:03,845
Why wouldn't we be?
452
00:27:04,022 --> 00:27:06,513
We're the best friends
in the whole wide world.
453
00:27:06,691 --> 00:27:09,592
We have got tons more business to do,
my friend.
454
00:27:09,761 --> 00:27:11,991
We are not done
taking this town by storm.
455
00:27:12,163 --> 00:27:15,030
I'm not sure if this town
is done taking us by storm...
456
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:16,792
...from behind...
- Always.
457
00:27:16,968 --> 00:27:18,902
...without so much as a reach-around.
458
00:27:19,537 --> 00:27:21,266
Boys and girls.
459
00:27:21,773 --> 00:27:22,797
Oh, we're cheers-ing.
460
00:27:22,974 --> 00:27:28,742
To hard cocks, wet pussies, bald heads,
Smurfs, and weathering the storm.
461
00:27:31,049 --> 00:27:32,539
Are you Jewish?
462
00:27:32,717 --> 00:27:36,619
I'm not sure if it's the whiskey talking,
but I fucking love you guys.
463
00:27:36,788 --> 00:27:38,756
I fucking love you too.
464
00:27:40,158 --> 00:27:41,250
E*specially you.
465
00:27:45,530 --> 00:27:46,792
They're doing it.
466
00:27:46,965 --> 00:27:48,432
You should kiss me now.
467
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:50,431
- We're kissing.
- So we have to.
468
00:27:53,705 --> 00:27:55,900
That's good salad dressing.
Ripped By mstoll