1
00:00:12,479 --> 00:00:16,782
♪ I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time ♪
2
00:00:16,784 --> 00:00:18,584
♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪
3
00:00:18,586 --> 00:00:20,719
♪ humble folks without temptation ♪
4
00:00:20,721 --> 00:00:23,756
♪ goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind ♪
5
00:00:23,758 --> 00:00:25,624
♪ ample parking day or night ♪
6
00:00:25,626 --> 00:00:27,626
♪ people spouting,
"howdy, neighbor!" ♪
7
00:00:27,628 --> 00:00:30,696
♪ heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
8
00:00:30,698 --> 00:00:33,766
♪ mrph rmhmhm rm!
Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪
9
00:00:33,768 --> 00:00:37,752
♪ come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine ♪
10
00:00:37,753 --> 00:00:40,514
sync and corrections by dreaMaker7
www.addic7ed.com web dl sync snarry
11
00:00:41,174 --> 00:00:43,944
Well, that was a lot of fun.
Thanks for inviting us, guys.
12
00:00:43,970 --> 00:00:45,220
Sure.
You bet.
13
00:00:45,338 --> 00:00:46,922
Are you guys parked over here?
14
00:00:47,056 --> 00:00:48,657
Oh, no, no, no.
We... we took a handicar.
15
00:00:48,725 --> 00:00:50,759
- It was easier that way.
- A handicar?
16
00:00:50,894 --> 00:00:52,728
- What's that?
- You don't use handicar?
17
00:00:52,754 --> 00:00:54,214
No, see, you just get the handicar app.
18
00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:57,649
It uses GPS to locate where you are,
and a handicar comes and picks you up.
19
00:00:57,675 --> 00:01:00,344
Yeah, and it's cheaper than a taxi.
20
00:01:00,370 --> 00:01:02,738
I'm telling you, it's the future
of transportation.
21
00:01:02,872 --> 00:01:05,574
Oh, here it comes.
Honey, our handicar's here.
22
00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:08,903
- Timmy!
- Have fun driving home.
23
00:01:08,929 --> 00:01:11,331
- I'll be relaxing on my iPad.
- Lucky.
24
00:01:11,462 --> 00:01:14,331
- Timmy!
- Download the app!
25
00:01:14,357 --> 00:01:16,328
It works great!
26
00:01:26,112 --> 00:01:28,553
Oh, excuse me?
I think someone puked back here.
27
00:01:28,966 --> 00:01:31,752
- You don't like puke?
- Could you turn the radio down
28
00:01:31,778 --> 00:01:33,445
and the air conditioning up, please?
29
00:01:33,471 --> 00:01:36,346
No air conditioning.
Too expensive.
30
00:01:39,209 --> 00:01:41,493
Not enough people taking cab.
31
00:01:41,628 --> 00:01:44,009
- Don't know what's wrong.
- Timmy!
32
00:01:48,272 --> 00:01:51,241
What the fuck?
33
00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:56,082
What the we got a big sales
event going on, folks!
34
00:01:56,216 --> 00:01:59,991
Hey, guys!
Can I get you in a 2014 Hummer?
35
00:02:00,017 --> 00:02:03,981
- Rocktober sales event, guys!
- No thanks.
36
00:02:04,007 --> 00:02:07,439
Only a few more guitar licks
left in rocktober, guys!
37
00:02:07,465 --> 00:02:09,217
We're good! Shut up!
38
00:02:09,243 --> 00:02:12,128
- Oh, here's our handicar.
- Timmy!
39
00:02:16,643 --> 00:02:18,706
What the fuck?
40
00:02:18,857 --> 00:02:22,459
All right, kids, you know what time
of year it is? That's right.
41
00:02:22,485 --> 00:02:24,653
It's autumn.
And that means our fundraising
42
00:02:24,679 --> 00:02:26,614
for next year's summer camp is
in full gear.
43
00:02:26,640 --> 00:02:28,941
Is everyone psyched for next
year's summer camp?
44
00:02:28,967 --> 00:02:30,913
Yay! Yay!
45
00:02:30,939 --> 00:02:34,505
- So far, Jimmy has raised $16!
- Yay!
46
00:02:34,531 --> 00:02:38,073
- Yay!
- Francis has raised $29.32.
47
00:02:40,036 --> 00:02:45,162
- And Timmy has raised $2,063!
- Timmy!
48
00:02:45,188 --> 00:02:47,354
All righty, if you guys keep this up,
49
00:02:47,380 --> 00:02:49,723
we'll raise the money for
summer camp in no time!
50
00:02:55,646 --> 00:02:58,403
I won't do it, Mimsy.
51
00:02:58,429 --> 00:03:01,615
I won't spend another summer at
that stupid camp.
52
00:03:01,641 --> 00:03:03,583
Derr, we don't like camp, boss?
53
00:03:03,609 --> 00:03:07,804
We hate camp, Mimsy.
The singing, the competitions,
54
00:03:07,830 --> 00:03:09,628
Jimmy Valmer getting all the chicks.
55
00:03:09,654 --> 00:03:11,976
Oh, yeah, and don't forget
last year at summer camp, you
56
00:03:12,002 --> 00:03:16,137
- got raped by a shark.
- Shut up, mimsy!
57
00:03:16,163 --> 00:03:19,699
I'm not gonna spend my summer
trapped at camp with these
58
00:03:19,725 --> 00:03:23,757
punch-happy assholes.
We got to find a way to put
59
00:03:23,783 --> 00:03:26,611
handicar out of business and fast.
60
00:03:26,637 --> 00:03:29,559
Oh, boy, we're gonna wreck
Timmy's business, huh, boss?
61
00:03:29,832 --> 00:03:33,321
Hey, boys. Are you excited
for camp next year?
62
00:03:33,347 --> 00:03:34,863
Yes, Counselor Steve.
63
00:03:34,889 --> 00:03:37,925
- We like the tug of war.
- All right, well, just keep
64
00:03:37,951 --> 00:03:41,443
- working on those donations.
- Come on, mimsy.
65
00:03:41,469 --> 00:03:44,374
We got to figure out how we're
gonna make handicar a thing of
66
00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:47,023
- the past.
- Oh, boy!
67
00:03:49,430 --> 00:03:53,476
We are united as brothers
because just as handicar's taken
68
00:03:53,502 --> 00:03:57,060
away jobs from honest,
hard-working cab drivers, it's
69
00:03:57,086 --> 00:04:00,722
also taking food from the mouths
of the children of car salesmen!
70
00:04:00,748 --> 00:04:04,461
I don't have any children.
Who does this handicapped boy
71
00:04:04,487 --> 00:04:07,589
think he is?
He's not even in union!
72
00:04:07,615 --> 00:04:10,779
He's taking all our business because
people find it more convenient!
73
00:04:10,805 --> 00:04:12,761
And because he's handicapped, he
74
00:04:12,787 --> 00:04:15,856
can use special access points
and parking spaces.
75
00:04:15,882 --> 00:04:18,326
That kid was born with an unfair
advantage!
76
00:04:18,352 --> 00:04:22,288
- Who is this rat?
- His name is Timmy Burch.
77
00:04:22,314 --> 00:04:25,983
And if you don't do something
quick, you're all gonna be out
78
00:04:26,009 --> 00:04:28,653
- of work for good.
- Who are you?
79
00:04:28,679 --> 00:04:31,650
Just someone who doesn't like
to see hard workers like
80
00:04:31,676 --> 00:04:34,196
yourselves lose their jobs.
That's all.
81
00:04:34,222 --> 00:04:36,723
Nobody takes jobs away from us!
82
00:04:36,749 --> 00:04:40,294
We need to speak to mayor and
tell her to shut down this
83
00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:43,021
- illegitimate business.
- Or maybe we could have the
84
00:04:43,047 --> 00:04:46,189
- police shut him down.
- Hey, I got an idea!
85
00:04:46,215 --> 00:04:49,350
Why don't you guys just make
your cars cleaner and nicer and
86
00:04:49,376 --> 00:04:52,253
try to be better to your
customers so that you can
87
00:04:52,279 --> 00:04:55,502
compete with handicar's
popularity in the marketplace?
88
00:04:57,209 --> 00:04:59,844
Just ignore my friend.
He's mentally disabled.
89
00:05:00,065 --> 00:05:01,398
Oh, yeah.
Don't mind me.
90
00:05:01,424 --> 00:05:05,460
Now, listen, everybody.
If you're a sheep herder and
91
00:05:05,486 --> 00:05:09,235
there's a snake taking away your sheep,
what do you do to the snake?
92
00:05:09,261 --> 00:05:13,900
Offer it last year's Christmas
in rocksummer prices?
93
00:05:13,926 --> 00:05:16,324
No, you fucking moron.
94
00:05:16,350 --> 00:05:18,704
You kill the snake.
95
00:05:26,698 --> 00:05:30,734
Timmy, Timmy.
Timmy, Timmy.
96
00:05:32,538 --> 00:05:35,064
Timmy, Timmy.
97
00:05:37,323 --> 00:05:40,980
- Hey, wake up, you little scab.
- T-t-Timmy?
98
00:05:41,006 --> 00:05:45,828
We got a message for ya from The Union.
99
00:05:50,798 --> 00:05:53,990
Just imagine it, Mimsy.
A whole summer to ourselves to
100
00:05:54,016 --> 00:05:57,673
do what we want.
It's going to be awesome.
101
00:05:59,080 --> 00:06:01,032
Well, well. Hello, gentlemen.
102
00:06:01,058 --> 00:06:04,091
I understand you've taken care
of our little problem?
103
00:06:04,117 --> 00:06:08,715
Yeah, we sure did. Let's just
say he'll be laid up awhile.
104
00:06:08,741 --> 00:06:10,722
Yeah, we snuck in his room last
105
00:06:10,748 --> 00:06:14,517
- night and we broke his legs.
- Oh, boy, that's gr...
106
00:06:14,543 --> 00:06:17,224
- Wait, you what?
- Timmy!
107
00:06:17,250 --> 00:06:21,572
- I am Lorde lordy, Lordy, Lorde!
- But we broke his legs.
108
00:06:21,598 --> 00:06:23,053
Both of them!
109
00:06:23,079 --> 00:06:26,234
Let me give you guys a hot news flash.
110
00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:28,798
If you want to hurt a crippled kid,
111
00:06:28,824 --> 00:06:31,814
you don't break his fucking legs!
112
00:06:32,825 --> 00:06:36,804
- How can people be so ineffectual, Mimsy?
- I don't know, boss.
113
00:06:36,830 --> 00:06:40,341
These are supposed to be men
who care about their occupation.
114
00:06:40,367 --> 00:06:42,618
Maybe if they're that
incompetent, we shouldn't be
115
00:06:42,644 --> 00:06:44,411
trying to save their jobs.
116
00:06:44,474 --> 00:06:47,421
Maybe handicar's a kind of
economic natural selection
117
00:06:47,447 --> 00:06:51,492
where the most diligent workers are
weeding out the useless ones. Derr!
118
00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:54,636
Shut up, Mimsy!
119
00:06:55,031 --> 00:06:57,562
Right here is good. Thank you.
120
00:06:57,588 --> 00:07:00,398
- I can just use the app to tip you, right?
- Timmy!
121
00:07:00,424 --> 00:07:03,104
Oh, this is so handy.
Thank you.
122
00:07:03,130 --> 00:07:04,940
Timmy.
123
00:07:05,315 --> 00:07:07,550
Timmy, Timmy.
124
00:07:07,576 --> 00:07:10,309
Hey, Timmy, it's your friend
from camp, Nathan.
125
00:07:10,335 --> 00:07:13,049
- Timmy!
- Listen, you can't possibly
126
00:07:13,075 --> 00:07:15,160
handle all this business you're
getting.
127
00:07:15,186 --> 00:07:18,854
Admit it. You've got more
customers than you can handle.
128
00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:20,508
Timmy.
129
00:07:20,534 --> 00:07:24,053
I've got an amazing idea.
Why don't you let other people
130
00:07:24,079 --> 00:07:27,585
drive handicars, too?
Think of all the money you could
131
00:07:27,611 --> 00:07:29,797
raise for camp if you expand
your business.
132
00:07:29,823 --> 00:07:31,858
Hmm. Timmy.
133
00:07:31,895 --> 00:07:34,434
I'm sure you could find a lot
of interested drivers.
134
00:07:34,460 --> 00:07:36,745
Timmy.
135
00:07:36,771 --> 00:07:40,875
That's great.
Summer camp, here we come.
136
00:07:40,901 --> 00:07:45,154
Now kiss your business goodbye, asshole.
137
00:07:45,443 --> 00:07:48,842
I don't get it, boss.
I thought you hated handicar.
138
00:07:48,868 --> 00:07:50,703
How's come now you want to work for him?
139
00:07:50,729 --> 00:07:54,328
It's very simple, Mimsy.
I'm gonna take down handicar by
140
00:07:54,354 --> 00:07:57,729
being an employee who sexually
harasses the passengers.
141
00:07:57,755 --> 00:08:01,279
- Uh, sexual harassment, boss?
- It's simple.
142
00:08:01,305 --> 00:08:04,576
If you're a sheep herder and a
snake is killing your sheep,
143
00:08:04,602 --> 00:08:08,494
you just need to have the snake get
sued for sexual misconduct.
144
00:08:08,520 --> 00:08:11,512
Now, you find me a female
passenger on that app
145
00:08:11,538 --> 00:08:14,450
- and leave the rest to me.
- Oh, boy!
146
00:08:21,981 --> 00:08:25,034
Timmy. Hello, ma'am.
147
00:08:25,060 --> 00:08:28,184
Handicar at your service.
Climb on in.
148
00:08:28,774 --> 00:08:36,247
So, let me ask you a question.
Would you like to see my dick?
149
00:08:36,952 --> 00:08:39,320
Sure. Would you like to see
mine?
150
00:08:39,595 --> 00:08:41,719
Uh-oh.
151
00:08:41,778 --> 00:08:43,418
Mimsy!
152
00:08:44,138 --> 00:08:47,154
Aah! Aah! Mimsy!
153
00:08:51,101 --> 00:08:53,718
- And I thought a shark was bad.
- Come on, honey.
154
00:08:58,006 --> 00:09:01,141
Come on, honey. It says our
handicar is just pulling up.
155
00:09:01,167 --> 00:09:04,155
Timmy. Oh, hi, Gerald, Sheila.
156
00:09:04,181 --> 00:09:05,875
Steven? What are you doing?
157
00:09:05,901 --> 00:09:07,948
You didn't know?
Anyone can be a handicar driver
158
00:09:07,974 --> 00:09:10,083
now. All you have to do is get your
159
00:09:10,109 --> 00:09:11,609
own wheelchair and you can earn
a handicap.
160
00:09:11,635 --> 00:09:13,911
I've had my handicap for about
three days now.
161
00:09:13,937 --> 00:09:15,045
Get on in.
162
00:09:16,315 --> 00:09:17,800
I'm telling you, Gerald, having
163
00:09:17,826 --> 00:09:20,360
a handicap is a great way to
make some money on the side.
164
00:09:20,619 --> 00:09:22,787
- Timmy!
- Timmy!
165
00:09:22,813 --> 00:09:25,014
- Timmy!
- The world of transportation
166
00:09:25,040 --> 00:09:27,264
is really changing, Gerald.
167
00:09:27,290 --> 00:09:31,593
Oh, gee, your idea to have handicar
expand really worked, boss.
168
00:09:31,619 --> 00:09:33,498
Excuse me.
Out of my way, please.
169
00:09:33,524 --> 00:09:34,784
I have a handicap.
170
00:09:34,810 --> 00:09:38,433
I had a handicap way before
you got paid to have one!
171
00:09:38,862 --> 00:09:41,764
Ha! You sound like that Matthew
McConaughey guy.
172
00:09:41,790 --> 00:09:43,775
"I drove a Lincoln way before I
173
00:09:43,801 --> 00:09:45,825
got paid to drive one." Derr!
174
00:09:45,851 --> 00:09:48,571
Shut up, Mimsy!
175
00:09:51,370 --> 00:09:53,823
For the past eight years,
Tesla has been the leading
176
00:09:53,849 --> 00:09:56,350
innovator in the world of
automotive transport.
177
00:09:56,376 --> 00:10:01,575
And now the president and CEO
of Tesla motorcars, Elon Musk.
178
00:10:06,545 --> 00:10:09,963
Today I am proud to announce
the Tesla D, the most innovative
179
00:10:09,996 --> 00:10:12,628
the most innovative and efficient
world-friendly
180
00:10:12,654 --> 00:10:16,362
mode of transportation
ever created. Any questions?
181
00:10:16,388 --> 00:10:19,951
- Yes, uh, what about handicar?
- What about it?
182
00:10:19,977 --> 00:10:22,429
Well, all over the country,
people are realizing that using
183
00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:25,123
an app to ride share is even
more convenient
184
00:10:25,149 --> 00:10:26,917
and eco-friendly than electric cars.
185
00:10:26,943 --> 00:10:30,596
How do you intend to compete
with this boy genius in Colorado?
186
00:10:31,301 --> 00:10:35,281
I am so sick of hearing about
app-based ride sharing!
187
00:10:35,307 --> 00:10:39,076
The future of transportation is
the electric car, not wheelchairs!
188
00:10:39,102 --> 00:10:40,382
Don't worry, Elon.
189
00:10:40,408 --> 00:10:41,818
Handicar is just a small company.
190
00:10:41,844 --> 00:10:44,315
Oh, sure. Operating in a few
small towns.
191
00:10:44,341 --> 00:10:47,210
But when they start absorbing
the taxi markets, bringing taxi
192
00:10:47,236 --> 00:10:50,405
service to any part of the
world, driving your kids to and
193
00:10:50,431 --> 00:10:53,105
from school, delivering both
people and things?
194
00:10:53,131 --> 00:10:54,834
We can't compete with handicar.
195
00:10:54,860 --> 00:10:56,611
It's just so damn handy!
196
00:10:56,690 --> 00:10:58,213
If there is a way to reduce
197
00:10:58,239 --> 00:11:01,274
handicar's positive publicity,
then we need to do it now.
198
00:11:01,300 --> 00:11:04,636
And you... you say it's
theoretically possible?
199
00:11:04,662 --> 00:11:07,254
Of course.
It's very simple.
200
00:11:07,280 --> 00:11:10,835
If you're a sheep herder and a
snake is killing all your sheep,
201
00:11:10,861 --> 00:11:15,831
- how do you get rid of the snake?
- Who's the sheep herder?
202
00:11:15,857 --> 00:11:18,992
- You are.
- Who's the snake?
203
00:11:19,018 --> 00:11:20,739
Handicar.
204
00:11:21,684 --> 00:11:23,349
It's an analogy!
205
00:11:23,375 --> 00:11:25,319
Shut up, Mimsy!
206
00:11:25,345 --> 00:11:28,514
If you're a sheep herder and
a snake is killing your sheep,
207
00:11:28,540 --> 00:11:31,084
all you have to do is prove to the
208
00:11:31,110 --> 00:11:34,960
sheep that the snake is a
completely inferior entity.
209
00:11:40,151 --> 00:11:41,972
- Timmy!
- Timmy!
210
00:11:46,611 --> 00:11:50,121
Hey, Timmy. How is the
fundraising for camp going?
211
00:11:50,147 --> 00:11:51,058
Timmy!
212
00:11:51,084 --> 00:11:53,932
That's great.
I can't wait for camp this year.
213
00:11:53,958 --> 00:11:56,251
We are doing some fundraising, too.
214
00:11:56,277 --> 00:11:59,364
Have you heard of my friend,
Elon Musk, from Tesla?
215
00:11:59,390 --> 00:12:01,665
- Good day to you.
- Timmy!
216
00:12:01,691 --> 00:12:04,890
Hey, how would you like to
have a friendly, little race?
217
00:12:04,916 --> 00:12:08,519
It would be great publicity for
your foundation and for ours.
218
00:12:08,545 --> 00:12:11,280
Darr, we're gonna get Timmy
killed in the race, huh, boss?
219
00:12:11,306 --> 00:12:14,736
- Shut up, Mimsy!
- What do you say, Timmy?
220
00:12:14,762 --> 00:12:20,117
A friendly race this Saturday?
We'll see you at 9:00 A.M. sharp.
221
00:12:32,221 --> 00:12:34,756
Hey, everyone!
You need to see this!
222
00:12:34,783 --> 00:12:37,715
What started as a simple
contest is quickly escalating
223
00:12:37,741 --> 00:12:41,410
into an international crisis.
As electronic cars challenge the
224
00:12:41,436 --> 00:12:44,037
oil industry and transportation
alternatives fight for
225
00:12:44,063 --> 00:12:46,597
dominance, the unavoidable
outcome may be a conflict the
226
00:12:46,623 --> 00:12:49,544
likes the world has not seen
since the '70s.
227
00:12:49,570 --> 00:12:52,505
It appears that the world is
once again on the brink...
228
00:12:52,657 --> 00:12:54,415
Of Wacky Races.
229
00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:56,728
Wacky Races? Holy shit!
230
00:12:56,754 --> 00:12:58,210
The prime minister of Japan
231
00:12:58,236 --> 00:13:01,348
has insisted that any race would
break the treaty of salzburg,
232
00:13:01,374 --> 00:13:03,758
which called for a cease-fire to
the Wacky Races for their
233
00:13:03,784 --> 00:13:06,339
senseless brutality.
They also claim that if a race
234
00:13:06,365 --> 00:13:08,983
does take place, they would have
no choice but to enter their
235
00:13:09,009 --> 00:13:11,777
completely self-driven prototype
Lexus into the conflict.
236
00:13:11,803 --> 00:13:14,037
The Canadians and Chinese are
also saying they would be forced
237
00:13:14,063 --> 00:13:16,813
to race, and no one yet has
heard from dick dastardly or
238
00:13:16,839 --> 00:13:19,331
muttley. Unless a miracle happens, this
239
00:13:19,357 --> 00:13:22,458
Saturday morning, the world will
witness the first Wacky Races in
240
00:13:22,484 --> 00:13:24,022
nearly 50 years.
241
00:13:30,588 --> 00:13:33,498
Randy, they're bringing back wacky
races Saturday morning!
242
00:13:33,536 --> 00:13:36,574
- I know! Are we watching at your house?
- That's it, everyone!
243
00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:38,935
- We're out of cereal!
- No!
244
00:13:38,961 --> 00:13:40,562
- I didn't get any!
- That guy has two!
245
00:13:40,588 --> 00:13:42,366
- There's none left!
- Don't you understand?!
246
00:13:43,128 --> 00:13:44,528
Don't you see what they're doing?
247
00:13:44,570 --> 00:13:47,270
This is just another example of
corporations trying to keep down
248
00:13:47,296 --> 00:13:50,098
- people with handicaps.
- Don't do the race.
249
00:13:50,124 --> 00:13:51,858
You don't have to prove anything.
250
00:13:51,884 --> 00:13:53,473
He has to do it. Don't you see?
251
00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:56,296
He has people that are depending
on him to raise as much money as
252
00:13:56,322 --> 00:13:58,090
possible. There are hundreds of people
253
00:13:58,116 --> 00:14:01,452
- with handicaps now.
- Timmy.
254
00:14:01,478 --> 00:14:03,899
But isn't that the problem?
I mean, let's face it.
255
00:14:03,925 --> 00:14:06,386
It's not like he's able to keep
the driver quality up.
256
00:14:06,412 --> 00:14:09,950
Anyone can have a handicap now.
I mean, even Matthew McConaughey's
257
00:14:09,976 --> 00:14:12,026
a handicar driver, for Christ's sake.
258
00:14:12,052 --> 00:14:17,160
- Hey.
- I was driving a handicar...
259
00:14:17,471 --> 00:14:22,141
Way before I got paid to drive one.
260
00:14:22,596 --> 00:14:24,370
I just like how it feels.
261
00:14:25,898 --> 00:14:27,773
Look, the point is that this
262
00:14:27,799 --> 00:14:29,550
is your opportunity to make handicar...
263
00:14:29,576 --> 00:14:31,440
Oop, sorry.
Hold on. Sorry.
264
00:14:31,466 --> 00:14:34,334
I went too far.
This is your opportunity to make
265
00:14:34,360 --> 00:14:36,899
handicar the transportation of
the future.
266
00:14:36,925 --> 00:14:39,319
Think what you could do with all that money.
267
00:14:42,340 --> 00:14:45,386
And here they are, the most
daredevil group of shared-ride
268
00:14:45,412 --> 00:14:48,467
drivers to ever whirl their
wheels in the Wacky Races.
269
00:14:48,493 --> 00:14:51,278
Competing for the title of the
future of transportation.
270
00:14:51,948 --> 00:14:54,175
Cars are approaching the starting line.
271
00:14:54,201 --> 00:14:57,968
First off is the lift car, a ride-sharing
company out of San Francisco.
272
00:14:57,994 --> 00:15:03,138
Next up is the zip car, a pay-by-the-hour
concept based on Chinese bicycles.
273
00:15:03,164 --> 00:15:06,343
Maneuvering for position is a
standard taxicab driven by an
274
00:15:06,369 --> 00:15:09,037
angry Russian. Right behind is a Hummer
275
00:15:09,063 --> 00:15:11,396
Salesman in his 2014 Hummer no class.
276
00:15:11,422 --> 00:15:15,239
And there's ingenious inventor
elon musk in his new Tesla D.
277
00:15:15,265 --> 00:15:18,183
Oh, and here's the lovely
Canadian actress neve Campbell
278
00:15:18,209 --> 00:15:21,361
in the Canadian concept vehicle,
the queef, powered completely on
279
00:15:21,387 --> 00:15:24,790
female natural gas.
Next we have the handicar with
280
00:15:24,816 --> 00:15:27,104
Timmy Burch, and there's the
completely automated
281
00:15:27,130 --> 00:15:30,749
self-driving car from Japan.
Limping along last are those
282
00:15:30,775 --> 00:15:34,093
double-dealing do-badders dick
dastardly and his sidekick, Muttley.
283
00:15:34,119 --> 00:15:36,634
And away they go.
284
00:15:36,660 --> 00:15:40,112
On the way out Wacky Races.
And this live coverage of the
285
00:15:40,138 --> 00:15:43,640
event will be broadcast all
morning, of course, on CNN.
286
00:15:43,666 --> 00:15:45,925
- Jesus. It's begun.
- God help them all.
287
00:15:45,951 --> 00:15:49,887
All I know is, if dastardly and
muttley are up to their old
288
00:15:49,913 --> 00:15:54,650
tricks, there's gonna be a lot
of violence today.
289
00:15:55,678 --> 00:15:58,121
You're watching BBC World.
290
00:15:58,147 --> 00:16:00,547
The violent conflict over
transport is underway, and it is
291
00:16:00,616 --> 00:16:04,385
even more senseless and vile
than many remember.
292
00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:08,755
We return you now to our live
coverage of the Wacky Races.
293
00:16:11,910 --> 00:16:15,539
As the Wacky Racers roll down
the roadway, we see that the
294
00:16:15,565 --> 00:16:18,091
taxicab is in the lead with
handicar pulling up the rear.
295
00:16:18,117 --> 00:16:19,197
Timmy!
296
00:16:20,188 --> 00:16:22,755
All the cars must follow the same route.
297
00:16:22,781 --> 00:16:24,135
First they'll leave the town of
298
00:16:24,161 --> 00:16:26,690
South Park then navigate through
giggling gulch on the final
299
00:16:26,716 --> 00:16:28,980
stretch to pick up the
passenger, a miss dotty
300
00:16:29,006 --> 00:16:31,046
applegate. Once the passenger is picked up,
301
00:16:31,072 --> 00:16:33,432
the vehicle must successfully
deliver her to the destination
302
00:16:33,458 --> 00:16:35,543
point at her daughter's house in Morrison.
303
00:16:35,569 --> 00:16:37,886
It looks like the zip car is
trying to vie for position past
304
00:16:37,912 --> 00:16:41,053
the Hummer vehicle. It's neck
and neck as the Wacky Racers
305
00:16:41,079 --> 00:16:44,440
all push to be first to
pick up the passenger.
306
00:16:44,853 --> 00:16:46,854
Miss applegate is waiting patiently.
307
00:16:47,136 --> 00:16:49,905
And Elon Musk's Tesla appears to
take the lead.
308
00:16:50,370 --> 00:16:52,876
Slow down!
I need Timmy to pick up the
309
00:16:52,902 --> 00:16:54,145
passenger before we do.
310
00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:57,987
But I thought we wanted
handicar to lose the race!
311
00:16:58,013 --> 00:16:59,519
He can't just lose the race.
312
00:16:59,545 --> 00:17:02,080
He has to get sued and lose the
whole business.
313
00:17:02,106 --> 00:17:04,928
That's why when he gets the
passenger, I've got a little
314
00:17:04,954 --> 00:17:08,590
- surprise waiting for him.
- Hey, boss, it seems like
315
00:17:08,616 --> 00:17:11,020
every time you come up with a
plan, it kind of backfires on
316
00:17:11,053 --> 00:17:12,758
you. If you really don't want to go
317
00:17:12,784 --> 00:17:15,763
to summer camp so bad, why don't
you just tell your parents how you feel?
318
00:17:15,789 --> 00:17:19,028
You know, tell them you don't want
to go and just see how they react.
319
00:17:20,127 --> 00:17:24,346
Wait, wait. I got it.
Shut up, Mimsy!
320
00:17:24,714 --> 00:17:25,966
- Hey, Mimsy.
- Yeah?
321
00:17:25,992 --> 00:17:27,258
Shut up!
322
00:17:27,451 --> 00:17:29,308
The Canadian car overtakes
323
00:17:29,334 --> 00:17:32,796
the self-driving car.
And now here comes the zip car,
324
00:17:32,822 --> 00:17:35,731
which is being driven
by Matthew McConaughey.
325
00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:43,754
I was driving a zip car... Way before
I got paid to drive one.
326
00:17:44,637 --> 00:17:45,504
And look at this.
327
00:17:45,530 --> 00:17:47,761
The lift car is the first to
arrive and pick up the
328
00:17:47,787 --> 00:17:51,239
passenger. Now the lift car must take the
329
00:17:51,265 --> 00:17:53,650
passenger to her destination,
but look at this.
330
00:17:53,676 --> 00:17:57,178
The Hummer salesman is running
the lift car off the road.
331
00:17:57,204 --> 00:17:59,978
And the Hummer salesman is
taking the passenger to the car,
332
00:18:00,004 --> 00:18:02,051
and he is going to let her drive herself.
333
00:18:02,478 --> 00:18:05,426
You've got a fully-automated
sound system, and your sunroof
334
00:18:05,452 --> 00:18:07,753
is operated right here.
What do you think, huh?
335
00:18:07,779 --> 00:18:09,863
Can you see yourself in one of
these puppies?
336
00:18:09,889 --> 00:18:12,844
Elon musk is using one of his
kooky inventions to put the
337
00:18:12,870 --> 00:18:16,039
Hummer out of commission for good.
338
00:18:16,065 --> 00:18:17,599
- Oh! God!
- Jesus!
339
00:18:17,625 --> 00:18:18,666
- Did you see that?
- Oh!
340
00:18:18,692 --> 00:18:21,168
The passenger is being
taken to the Tesla D now.
341
00:18:22,324 --> 00:18:23,637
No, wait.
342
00:18:23,663 --> 00:18:26,164
She just got snatched by the
pissed off Russian in his taxi.
343
00:18:26,439 --> 00:18:28,953
Miss applegate is now in the
back of the taxi, and she's
344
00:18:28,979 --> 00:18:31,957
being forced to watch Jimmy Fallon.
345
00:18:31,983 --> 00:18:35,531
Uh-oh. The Canadian car's
completely run out of queefs.
346
00:18:36,851 --> 00:18:39,037
With the race nearly over, it's
347
00:18:39,063 --> 00:18:41,614
the taxi out in front, followed
by self-driving car, and then
348
00:18:41,640 --> 00:18:44,809
- pulling up in third is handicar.
- Timmy!
349
00:18:44,835 --> 00:18:50,056
- It's gonna be a close one.
- Not too close, boopsie.
350
00:18:50,082 --> 00:18:53,851
Oh, no. Dick Dastardly is up
to no-do-goodery again.
351
00:18:53,877 --> 00:18:55,783
Oh! Oh! Dude! Oh!
352
00:19:03,662 --> 00:19:06,497
And there's handicar to pick Mrs. Applegate up!
353
00:19:07,554 --> 00:19:10,319
That's it. Handicar has the passenger.
354
00:19:10,345 --> 00:19:13,430
We're almost in range.
Another 100 feet.
355
00:19:13,456 --> 00:19:18,928
Wait a minute. What the hell are
all of those cars? Holy shit!
356
00:19:18,954 --> 00:19:23,924
- Timmy!
- Timmy!
357
00:19:25,213 --> 00:19:27,381
- Timmy!
- Timmy!
358
00:19:27,682 --> 00:19:30,526
We're near the finish line.
The race is almost over.
359
00:19:30,552 --> 00:19:33,096
Handicar is in the lead still
way out in front of the zip
360
00:19:33,122 --> 00:19:35,622
car, driven by Matthew McConaughey.
361
00:19:38,013 --> 00:19:42,193
Sometimes you got to go
forward by going backward.
362
00:19:43,140 --> 00:19:47,520
Are we driving cars or are cars driving us?
363
00:19:47,679 --> 00:19:49,938
The dastardly car is racing past both.
364
00:19:49,964 --> 00:19:52,032
This could be an upset, folks.
365
00:19:53,663 --> 00:19:55,764
Timmy!
366
00:19:55,790 --> 00:19:57,681
Good night, you son of a bitch.
367
00:20:01,265 --> 00:20:04,761
Mimsy, I told you to put the
explosives under Timmy's seat!
368
00:20:04,787 --> 00:20:06,787
You told me to put the
explosives under the seat of
369
00:20:06,813 --> 00:20:09,948
that fake, soft-spoken douchebag
that everyone loves!
370
00:20:09,974 --> 00:20:13,509
Not that fake, soft-spoken
douchebag that everyone loves!
371
00:20:13,535 --> 00:20:15,978
Oh, my. It appears that an explosion has
372
00:20:16,004 --> 00:20:19,507
opened up a wormhole with
Matthew McConaughey inside.
373
00:20:19,533 --> 00:20:21,279
Mimsy...
374
00:20:22,824 --> 00:20:24,856
And there's the finish.
375
00:20:24,882 --> 00:20:26,378
It looks like handicar has done it.
376
00:20:26,404 --> 00:20:27,886
Timmy!
377
00:20:30,620 --> 00:20:32,988
A big congratulations to our
378
00:20:33,014 --> 00:20:35,631
fundraising champion.
After selling the handicar
379
00:20:35,657 --> 00:20:40,470
rights to Elon Musk, Timmy has raised
$2.3 billion for summer camp.
380
00:20:42,098 --> 00:20:43,732
Great job to all of you.
381
00:20:43,758 --> 00:20:46,524
This is sure to be the best
summer camp ever!
382
00:20:49,349 --> 00:20:51,469
All set for bed, honey?
383
00:20:51,626 --> 00:20:55,672
- Yeah, I like to sleep at nighttime!
- All right. Good night.
384
00:20:57,157 --> 00:21:00,175
Wait. Wait. Mom?
385
00:21:00,730 --> 00:21:03,534
- Can we talk?
- Um, yes.
386
00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:07,080
- O-of course.
- This is very difficult, mom.
387
00:21:07,106 --> 00:21:08,789
But, um...
388
00:21:09,102 --> 00:21:12,071
You know how every year
I go to summer camp?
389
00:21:12,097 --> 00:21:14,818
Well... I hate it.
390
00:21:14,844 --> 00:21:18,480
I hate it, and I don't want to
go anymore.
391
00:21:18,654 --> 00:21:21,826
I'm sorry I can't understand you, honey.
You're handicapped.
392
00:21:21,852 --> 00:21:23,752
What's to understand?
393
00:21:23,836 --> 00:21:27,266
I'm telling you I don't want to got
to that stupid camp anymore!
394
00:21:27,614 --> 00:21:29,958
You want water? Is that what you want?
395
00:21:29,984 --> 00:21:32,448
No, I don't want to go to camp!
396
00:21:32,474 --> 00:21:35,443
Oh, yes, ok, honey, I'll turn off the lamp.
397
00:21:35,960 --> 00:21:38,945
No! That's not what I fucking said!
398
00:21:38,971 --> 00:21:42,160
Goddamn it, now I can't even see.
399
00:21:42,186 --> 00:21:43,503
What's he saying?
400
00:21:43,529 --> 00:21:45,322
That he doesn't want to go
to summer camp this year.
401
00:21:45,348 --> 00:21:47,607
But I'll be damned if he's
gonna ruin our Italy trip.
402
00:21:47,698 --> 00:21:49,519
Right.
403
00:21:49,659 --> 00:21:50,933
Mimsy!
404
00:21:50,995 --> 00:21:54,488
sync and corrections by dreaMaker7
www.addic7ed.com web dl sync snarry