﻿1
00:00:00,448 --> 00:00:04,753
<b>- sync and corrections by Zac -
- www.addic7ed.com -</b>

2
00:00:05,023 --> 00:00:07,724
[Spooky voice] This guy
messaged me on OkCupid.

3
00:00:07,726 --> 00:00:09,776
Didn't this used
to be a Blockbuster?

4
00:00:09,811 --> 00:00:11,311
Can't we just go as
the Golden Ghouls again?

5
00:00:11,312 --> 00:00:12,812
I still got the blouses.

6
00:00:12,864 --> 00:00:14,756
No, I am not spending
another Halloween dressed

7
00:00:14,757 --> 00:00:16,649
as an old, dead woman
from an '80s TV show.

8
00:00:16,701 --> 00:00:19,235
We're throwing a party this year.
We're gonna be the fun gays.

9
00:00:19,237 --> 00:00:22,372
I'm already a fun gay. You're
literally the least fun gay I know.

10
00:00:22,407 --> 00:00:25,041
[Laughs] What's not fun and gay
about being a Golden Ghoul?

11
00:00:25,076 --> 00:00:27,794
Shouldn't you and Eddie be doing a
couple's costume by now anyway?

12
00:00:27,829 --> 00:00:29,813
What, and be like
Dom and Doris,

13
00:00:29,814 --> 00:00:31,798
San Francisco's most
annoying Halloween couple?

14
00:00:31,833 --> 00:00:33,833
- Hey.
- Hey, how about a hairy fairy?

15
00:00:33,885 --> 00:00:35,885
[Gasps] Oh, man, I hate you.

16
00:00:35,920 --> 00:00:37,754
I love it.
You look good in wings.

17
00:00:37,756 --> 00:00:38,921
- You think so?
- Yeah.

18
00:00:38,923 --> 00:00:41,174
Amazing. Your hair
and that glitter.

19
00:00:41,226 --> 00:00:43,092
[Laughs] All right, we're in.

20
00:00:43,144 --> 00:00:43,988
Oh, good.

21
00:00:43,989 --> 00:00:45,678
Yeah. See, glitter, that's
all I needed to hear.

22
00:00:45,730 --> 00:00:47,397
Just, glitter does it.

23
00:00:47,432 --> 00:00:49,682
The Facebook invite says 9:00,

24
00:00:49,734 --> 00:00:51,317
which means people probably
are gonna show up around 10:00,

25
00:00:51,352 --> 00:00:52,852
so I think we should
have the keg by 8:30.

26
00:00:52,904 --> 00:00:54,487
- It'll be there.
- Hey, I gotta go.

27
00:00:54,522 --> 00:00:56,406
- Where are you going?
- Gotta get to work.

28
00:00:56,441 --> 00:00:58,775
- It's Saturday.
- Homeless gay kids don't stop

29
00:00:58,777 --> 00:01:00,243
being homeless
on the weekend, Paddy.

30
00:01:00,278 --> 00:01:01,911
But you're supposed
to get the cups and plates.

31
00:01:01,946 --> 00:01:03,446
Well, can't you do it?
I promised Eddie

32
00:01:03,448 --> 00:01:05,531
- I would help out with the pumpkins.
- No, I have to go to the office

33
00:01:05,583 --> 00:01:07,834
- to get the "monster mash" remix.
- The what?

34
00:01:07,869 --> 00:01:09,603
- The karaoke remix of...
- I'm already late.

35
00:01:09,604 --> 00:01:11,337
I gotta go or else
I'll be late. Bye.

36
00:01:11,372 --> 00:01:14,207
[Sighs] How is it that the
new, thoughtful Agustin

37
00:01:14,259 --> 00:01:16,092
still leaves me
with everything to do?

38
00:01:16,127 --> 00:01:17,877
- He's doing his best.
- I guess so.

39
00:01:17,929 --> 00:01:19,679
His best just isn't that great.

40
00:01:19,714 --> 00:01:21,347
[Laughs] That's true.
Right?

41
00:01:21,382 --> 00:01:22,048
Yes.

42
00:01:22,100 --> 00:01:24,183
[Door opens]

43
00:01:51,830 --> 00:01:53,746
[Video game sound effects
Hey.

44
00:01:53,798 --> 00:01:56,966
- Oh. Jesus. Oh.
- Sorry.

45
00:01:57,001 --> 00:01:58,501
You scared the shit out of me.

46
00:01:58,503 --> 00:02:01,254
Well, it is Halloween.
What are you playing?

47
00:02:01,306 --> 00:02:04,557
Oh, just something I've already
beaten about 15 times,

48
00:02:04,592 --> 00:02:06,392
I just haven't gotten
the perfect score yet.

49
00:02:06,427 --> 00:02:09,979
Here I am thinking you're shaming
me by working on the weekend.

50
00:02:10,014 --> 00:02:12,014
Well, I sort of did some work.

51
00:02:12,066 --> 00:02:14,851
I coded some of that app
we were talking about.

52
00:02:14,903 --> 00:02:17,687
Seriously?
The gay battle game?

53
00:02:17,689 --> 00:02:20,022
- I didn't know that you were still...
- No...

54
00:02:20,074 --> 00:02:21,741
[Clears throat]
I was just bored, I guess.

55
00:02:21,776 --> 00:02:25,278
Inventing work for myself.

56
00:02:25,330 --> 00:02:28,531
Anyway, what are
you doing here?

57
00:02:28,533 --> 00:02:29,999
Haven't you got
a party to prepare?

58
00:02:30,034 --> 00:02:33,619
- That's what I'm doing.
- By stealing from the office?

59
00:02:33,671 --> 00:02:36,873
Just a few Twix.
[Laughs]

60
00:02:36,875 --> 00:02:40,259
- You, uh, you got the evite, right?
- I did.

61
00:02:40,295 --> 00:02:42,795
Cool. You don't have to come if you
don't want to. I totally get it.

62
00:02:42,847 --> 00:02:44,463
- Do you not want me to come?
- No.

63
00:02:44,516 --> 00:02:47,216
No, I just... I...
I didn't want you to...

64
00:02:47,218 --> 00:02:50,052
Think that I was having a party
and purposely not inviting you.

65
00:02:50,054 --> 00:02:52,555
I appreciate the gesture, Patrick,
but seeing as it might be

66
00:02:52,557 --> 00:02:54,974
my only Halloween
in San Francisco,

67
00:02:55,026 --> 00:02:57,193
I feel like Jon and I may
opt to see the sights.

68
00:02:57,228 --> 00:02:58,531
What does that mean?

69
00:03:00,565 --> 00:03:02,982
We talked about going
back to Seattle.

70
00:03:03,034 --> 00:03:05,735
- What?
- Mm. Be good for us, I think.

71
00:03:05,737 --> 00:03:07,846
Jon misses his family,
and I feel like I

72
00:03:07,847 --> 00:03:09,956
made him leave a
job he really liked.

73
00:03:09,991 --> 00:03:12,909
- I guess I get that, but...
- But what?

74
00:03:12,911 --> 00:03:16,829
[Sighs] You basically
just got here, right?

75
00:03:16,881 --> 00:03:20,750
It'd be better for us.

76
00:03:20,752 --> 00:03:23,386
For me.

77
00:03:27,809 --> 00:03:29,675
Well, this city
is really fun on Halloween,

78
00:03:29,727 --> 00:03:32,979
but it can also be
kind of nuts, so...

79
00:03:33,014 --> 00:03:34,013
Be safe.

80
00:03:34,065 --> 00:03:35,097
- I will.
- Happy Halloween.

81
00:03:35,149 --> 00:03:36,265
Yeah, yeah. You too.

82
00:03:39,687 --> 00:03:43,406
[Dance music plays]

83
00:03:43,441 --> 00:03:46,859
Last year, Dustin wrote "anal rape
pumpkin." So this is progress.

84
00:03:46,911 --> 00:03:50,112
It was a political statement.
Who did that one?

85
00:03:50,164 --> 00:03:52,782
- That's mine.
- It's very Banksy.

86
00:03:52,834 --> 00:03:54,283
No fuckin' way
you did that.

87
00:03:54,285 --> 00:03:57,453
- Uh, yeah, I did.
- Thanks for believing in us.

88
00:03:57,455 --> 00:03:59,171
I only believe in three things:

89
00:03:59,207 --> 00:04:02,124
It's RuPaul, Hillary Clinton,
and you kids. So relax.

90
00:04:02,176 --> 00:04:05,094
- You guys have no taste.
- Hey, don't be rude,

91
00:04:05,129 --> 00:04:08,598
or you're not gonna get one of these
delicious IHOP gift certificates.

92
00:04:08,633 --> 00:04:11,968
- Pancakes suck, Mr. Eddie.
- Wait, what, pancakes suck?

93
00:04:12,020 --> 00:04:14,971
Only in America can a homeless kid
complain about free pancakes.

94
00:04:14,973 --> 00:04:16,439
Look, this is from a grant.

95
00:04:16,474 --> 00:04:20,142
So get yourself a spooky
lumberjack stack. It's Halloween!

96
00:04:20,194 --> 00:04:21,894
Hey. You dressing up tonight?

97
00:04:21,946 --> 00:04:23,646
Does a bottom howl at the moon?

98
00:04:23,648 --> 00:04:26,482
- I don't know what that means.
- Sure you don't.

99
00:04:26,534 --> 00:04:30,152
You should spend the night.
After the party.

100
00:04:30,204 --> 00:04:31,821
You mean, like,
in the bed with you?

101
00:04:31,873 --> 00:04:35,825
Like, yes, in the bed with me.
Clothing optional.

102
00:04:35,877 --> 00:04:39,996
Yeah... I told some friends I'd meet
them at the Endup after your party.

103
00:04:40,048 --> 00:04:41,548
- Oh.
- But depending on

104
00:04:41,549 --> 00:04:43,049
your Halloween costume,

105
00:04:43,084 --> 00:04:45,418
- perhaps I could be persuaded.
- Oh.

106
00:04:45,470 --> 00:04:48,170
- Is that a challenge?
- You tell me.

107
00:04:48,172 --> 00:04:50,473
[Gasps] Ooh...

108
00:04:50,508 --> 00:04:52,558
Okay. All right.
I'm coming for you.

109
00:04:52,593 --> 00:04:54,510
- Yeah, what you got, boy?
- Oh, I got it.

110
00:04:54,512 --> 00:04:56,729
I know exactly what I'm bringing.
You're gonna love it.

111
00:04:56,764 --> 00:04:58,898
- All right, I'm waiting.
- You're spending the night.

112
00:04:58,933 --> 00:05:00,733
You might even
spend many nights.

113
00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:02,685
All right, slow your roll.
[Laughs]

114
00:05:02,737 --> 00:05:05,521
Hey, can you take
a look at this for me?

115
00:05:05,573 --> 00:05:07,657
If this involves curating
your naked selfies,

116
00:05:07,692 --> 00:05:09,492
I already told you I think it's
weird if you show your butthole.

117
00:05:09,527 --> 00:05:11,744
It's not naked selfies.
Look. [Gasps]

118
00:05:11,779 --> 00:05:14,280
- You're tweeting.
- It's good for the KickStarter.

119
00:05:14,332 --> 00:05:17,450
@chickendom40, all right,
you have 30 followers.

120
00:05:17,502 --> 00:05:19,535
That's not much of an
expansion, my friend. Sorry.

121
00:05:19,587 --> 00:05:21,003
Oh, you're a beacon
of positivity. Thank you.

122
00:05:21,039 --> 00:05:22,505
Okay, no. Sorry, sorry, sorry.
No.

123
00:05:22,540 --> 00:05:24,840
I'm glad you're sticking with it.
That's good.

124
00:05:24,876 --> 00:05:26,625
You also realize you're
asking for Twitter help

125
00:05:26,678 --> 00:05:28,028
from the woman who
just found out last

126
00:05:28,029 --> 00:05:29,378
week that my phone
has a calendar on it.

127
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:31,014
- Congratulations.
- So helpful. Why don't

128
00:05:31,015 --> 00:05:32,598
you ask one of
Patrick's techie friends

129
00:05:32,633 --> 00:05:34,092
- to help you tonight?
- Oh, you mean, like,

130
00:05:34,093 --> 00:05:35,551
"hey, come help grandpa
use the clicker?"

131
00:05:35,553 --> 00:05:39,188
Yeah, exactly. It's the least that
they could do for ruining the city.

132
00:05:39,223 --> 00:05:40,940
You know,
speaking of tonight...

133
00:05:40,975 --> 00:05:43,109
I know we said we'd never
do it, but then I saw this,

134
00:05:43,144 --> 00:05:45,194
and I was like, "fuck it,
we are doing it this year."

135
00:05:45,229 --> 00:05:48,197
Oh my God! No!
That's not She-Ra's headdress.

136
00:05:48,232 --> 00:05:49,316
No!

137
00:05:49,317 --> 00:05:51,484
Oh, and wait one
moment. That's not all.

138
00:05:51,536 --> 00:05:53,786
Right next to it, we have...
Oh, man!

139
00:05:53,821 --> 00:05:57,573
Right? And you are gonna flip
when you see my wig.

140
00:05:58,659 --> 00:06:00,576
- Shit.
- What?

141
00:06:00,628 --> 00:06:03,412
I told Malik that
I would dress up with him.

142
00:06:03,464 --> 00:06:06,999
We were drunk
and I kinda promised.

143
00:06:07,051 --> 00:06:09,085
Oh.

144
00:06:09,087 --> 00:06:12,338
No, it's fine.
I mean, you're a couple now.

145
00:06:12,390 --> 00:06:14,840
You should wear
a couple's costume.

146
00:06:14,892 --> 00:06:16,892
All right, I see what you're doing.
I see what you're doing.

147
00:06:16,928 --> 00:06:18,887
What is it with gay people
trying to ruin straight

148
00:06:18,888 --> 00:06:20,846
people's relationships
with their labels?

149
00:06:20,898 --> 00:06:24,016
We are two adults who
occasionally sleep together,

150
00:06:24,068 --> 00:06:28,320
and we're going to a party dressed
as romantically involved partners.

151
00:06:28,356 --> 00:06:31,607
- That's all. That's all.
- Got it. Got it.

152
00:06:31,609 --> 00:06:33,609
[Sighs] But now
I wanna see the wig.

153
00:06:33,611 --> 00:06:34,577
- Really?
- Yes.

154
00:06:34,612 --> 00:06:35,611
- You really do?
- You got me.

155
00:06:35,613 --> 00:06:36,662
Oh my God.

156
00:06:36,697 --> 00:06:39,081
You're gonna be so jealous

157
00:06:39,117 --> 00:06:40,332
that you're not coming with me,

158
00:06:40,368 --> 00:06:44,336
- because this is kind of awesome.
- Oh, no. Okay.

159
00:06:44,372 --> 00:06:47,757
Ew. Oh God, you look like
a mentally ill Barbie doll,

160
00:06:47,792 --> 00:06:49,291
after I cut off
my Barbie doll's hair.

161
00:06:49,343 --> 00:06:50,626
Really?
Was she still pretty?

162
00:06:50,628 --> 00:06:52,762
No, 'cause I also
burned her nose down.

163
00:06:52,797 --> 00:06:55,131
Nose job.
[Growls]

164
00:06:55,133 --> 00:06:56,966
[Dance music plays faintly]

165
00:06:56,968 --> 00:06:59,301
Hey. I'm almost done.

166
00:06:59,303 --> 00:07:00,936
Hey, will you velcro
me in the back, please?

167
00:07:00,972 --> 00:07:02,972
- Okay. Yeah.
- Thank you.

168
00:07:02,974 --> 00:07:04,890
- Oh, drinks, thank you.
- Yeah.

169
00:07:04,942 --> 00:07:07,610
- How good is this costume?
- Yeah.

170
00:07:07,645 --> 00:07:10,646
- What're you supposed to be?
- I'm Gordon Freeman.

171
00:07:10,648 --> 00:07:13,315
And he's, like, what,
a mailman from the future?

172
00:07:13,367 --> 00:07:16,569
No, he's one of the most popular
video game characters of all time.

173
00:07:16,621 --> 00:07:18,388
He revolutionized
first-person shooter games

174
00:07:18,389 --> 00:07:20,156
because you so rarely
saw or heard him,

175
00:07:20,208 --> 00:07:21,957
you could better imagine
yourself in the game.

176
00:07:21,993 --> 00:07:24,326
Wait, so, your idea
of a fun gay is a character

177
00:07:24,328 --> 00:07:26,829
with so little personality
he's basically nothing?

178
00:07:26,831 --> 00:07:30,216
No, my idea of being a fun gay
is to have an amazing costume,

179
00:07:30,251 --> 00:07:32,468
to forget everything that
Kevin told me earlier today...

180
00:07:32,503 --> 00:07:33,553
Oh, fuck that guy...

181
00:07:33,554 --> 00:07:35,004
And to throw an amazing
party, all right?

182
00:07:35,006 --> 00:07:37,173
Tonight, I'm gonna be
hashtag "instagayed,"

183
00:07:37,225 --> 00:07:39,184
and people are gonna
be like, "wow, who is

184
00:07:39,185 --> 00:07:41,143
that really cute,
well-adjusted, single guy?"

185
00:07:41,179 --> 00:07:43,395
It's me, America.
Get into it.

186
00:07:43,431 --> 00:07:45,431
[Laughs] Or people will
be like, "oh my God."

187
00:07:45,483 --> 00:07:46,932
"I can't believe
that mailman from the future"

188
00:07:46,984 --> 00:07:49,318
"didn't drop off that package
I haven't ordered yet."

189
00:07:49,353 --> 00:07:51,187
Okay, I'm gonna pretend
you didn't say that.

190
00:07:51,239 --> 00:07:52,855
Okay, here we go.

191
00:07:52,857 --> 00:07:54,690
- To Morgan Freeman.
- It...

192
00:07:54,742 --> 00:07:57,276
- To Gordon Freeman.
- Thank you. Gordon Freeman.

193
00:07:57,328 --> 00:07:59,445
- Gordon Freeman.
- Gordon... if people ask.

194
00:07:59,497 --> 00:08:01,447
- Gordon...
- If people ask?

195
00:08:01,499 --> 00:08:02,698
Yeah, people will ask.

196
00:08:02,750 --> 00:08:05,367
- People are gonna know.
- People are gonna ask.

197
00:08:11,542 --> 00:08:13,092
[Laughing]

198
00:08:13,127 --> 00:08:15,010
Hey, Mr. Fung is cool
with the music, right?

199
00:08:15,046 --> 00:08:17,046
- Sometimes Fung freaks out.
- Fung'll be fine,

200
00:08:17,048 --> 00:08:19,682
though I'm not so sure
about everyone else.

201
00:08:19,717 --> 00:08:22,101
What is this playlist,
"now music 5"?

202
00:08:22,136 --> 00:08:23,620
No, it's my special
party playlist, and

203
00:08:23,621 --> 00:08:25,104
if you touch it
I'm gonna kill you.

204
00:08:25,139 --> 00:08:29,558
Oh my God, you're Maleficent.
That is such a good costume.

205
00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:31,777
You look amazing.

206
00:08:31,812 --> 00:08:33,062
Keg!

207
00:08:33,114 --> 00:08:34,563
- Oh my God!
- Yes!

208
00:08:34,565 --> 00:08:38,067
[Laughing]
Master of my universe!

209
00:08:38,119 --> 00:08:40,035
- He-Man!
- Wow.

210
00:08:40,071 --> 00:08:42,404
What fabulous secret powers
are you going to reveal tonight

211
00:08:42,406 --> 00:08:44,156
when you hold aloft
your magic sword?

212
00:08:44,208 --> 00:08:46,458
Wouldn't you like to know?
And you are?

213
00:08:46,494 --> 00:08:48,627
- I'm Gordon Freeman.
- Okay.

214
00:08:48,663 --> 00:08:50,212
Ta-da!

215
00:08:50,248 --> 00:08:52,831
He's one of the most popular video
game characters of all time.

216
00:08:52,884 --> 00:08:53,817
- He revolutionized...
- You don't

217
00:08:53,818 --> 00:08:54,750
want to hear
the explanation.

218
00:08:54,752 --> 00:08:57,469
Where do you guys want this? It
weighs like a million fucking pounds.

219
00:08:57,505 --> 00:08:59,388
- In the kitchen.
- In the kitchen, yeah, yeah. And also,

220
00:08:59,423 --> 00:09:01,090
promise you're gonna
do karaoke later, okay?

221
00:09:01,142 --> 00:09:03,058
- Oh God, do I have to?
- Yes, yes!

222
00:09:03,094 --> 00:09:04,510
- You have to sign up.
- We all do.

223
00:09:04,562 --> 00:09:06,228
Actually, everyone,
there's gonna be karaoke later.

224
00:09:06,264 --> 00:09:09,932
So there's a sheet. There's
a sign-up sheet in there.

225
00:09:09,984 --> 00:09:13,936
[Dance music plays]

226
00:09:13,938 --> 00:09:17,273
Hey, uh, I gave your
KickStarter, like, 35 bucks.

227
00:09:17,275 --> 00:09:20,743
That means I get some sort
of coupon for nuggets, right?

228
00:09:20,778 --> 00:09:22,278
Hey, you're
a social media guy, right?

229
00:09:22,330 --> 00:09:24,446
Yeah.
Am I a social media guy?

230
00:09:24,498 --> 00:09:26,498
I have 3,300 Tumblr followers.

231
00:09:26,534 --> 00:09:27,866
Isn't that just for porn?

232
00:09:27,919 --> 00:09:30,920
No, what... it's not...
It's not not for porn.

233
00:09:30,955 --> 00:09:33,923
But it's... do you not know
what a Tumblr is?

234
00:09:33,958 --> 00:09:35,507
[Dance music plays]

235
00:09:35,543 --> 00:09:38,761
No way.
[Laughing]

236
00:09:38,796 --> 00:09:40,930
- That is crazy!
- Come on.

237
00:09:40,965 --> 00:09:42,965
- You guys are, uh...
- Come on.

238
00:09:42,967 --> 00:09:44,350
- You're, uh...
- Come on.

239
00:09:44,385 --> 00:09:46,302
- Oh my God, you don't know?
- No, I...

240
00:09:46,354 --> 00:09:51,440
Come on. Ooh!
[Vocalizing]

241
00:09:51,475 --> 00:09:53,442
We're like pigeons.
We're like singing pigeons.

242
00:09:53,477 --> 00:09:55,394
We're not singing pigeons.
We're Sonny and Cher!

243
00:09:55,446 --> 00:09:57,813
Oh, yes! Yes!
Sonny and Cher!

244
00:09:57,865 --> 00:09:59,949
Oh my God, you guys
are the cutest.

245
00:09:59,984 --> 00:10:02,083
See, babe? Patrick
says we're the cutest.

246
00:10:02,118 --> 00:10:02,817
The cutest.

247
00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:04,987
Yeah, you're gonna believe that
from the gay Walter White?

248
00:10:05,039 --> 00:10:07,823
- Or Tron, or whatever you are.
- No, it's Gordon Freeman.

249
00:10:07,825 --> 00:10:09,867
I don't know what it's
gonna take to convince

250
00:10:09,868 --> 00:10:11,910
this woman that
she's in love with me.

251
00:10:11,963 --> 00:10:14,163
- That is so intense.
- Yeah, that's a little intense.

252
00:10:14,165 --> 00:10:17,333
You know what's less intense?
Sonny and Cher karaoke duet.

253
00:10:17,385 --> 00:10:18,500
- Oh!
- Right?

254
00:10:18,552 --> 00:10:20,419
Inside, I got
a karaoke machine!

255
00:10:20,471 --> 00:10:22,504
- Karaoke!
- That sounds awful.

256
00:10:22,506 --> 00:10:24,139
- I need shots.
- Go in and get a drink,

257
00:10:24,175 --> 00:10:26,675
and then sign up, though. I'm
trying to avoid party conflict

258
00:10:26,727 --> 00:10:28,344
with people fighting
over who goes next.

259
00:10:28,346 --> 00:10:31,397
[Overlapping chatter]
Ding-dong!

260
00:10:31,432 --> 00:10:32,898
- Oh!
- Love you, Cher.

261
00:10:32,933 --> 00:10:34,850
- Love you, He-Man.
- Look at that ass!

262
00:10:34,852 --> 00:10:39,855
Hey, what do you think of
dom'sjuicychicken.tumblr.com?

263
00:10:39,907 --> 00:10:41,690
I have no idea
what you're talking about.

264
00:10:41,742 --> 00:10:44,994
My God, I spent $200 on that karaoke
machine and no one is singing.

265
00:10:45,029 --> 00:10:46,612
- What?
- The karaoke machine.

266
00:10:46,664 --> 00:10:48,330
I thought it would be,
you know, a good party thing.

267
00:10:48,366 --> 00:10:50,366
- Seriously?
- I want people to have fun.

268
00:10:50,418 --> 00:10:52,117
People are having fun.
You're not having fun.

269
00:10:52,203 --> 00:10:53,419
No, I am having plenty of fun.

270
00:10:53,454 --> 00:10:56,255
Okay, Clarissa Dalloway.
Lay off on the booze, okay?

271
00:10:56,290 --> 00:10:59,008
- <i>You smell like my tia Stella.
- Who's Clarissa Dalloway?</i>

272
00:10:59,043 --> 00:11:00,060
<i>Well, who's tia Stella?</i>

273
00:11:00,061 --> 00:11:02,094
One person. I've got
one person on this list.

274
00:11:02,129 --> 00:11:04,847
- Oh my goodness!
- Huh?

275
00:11:04,882 --> 00:11:06,507
- Right, cutie.
- Girl, what you supposed to be?

276
00:11:06,508 --> 00:11:08,133
The chlamydia fairy?

277
00:11:08,185 --> 00:11:10,602
What?
Are you Hagrid from "Harry Potter"?

278
00:11:10,638 --> 00:11:11,854
Bilbo Baggins, motherfucker.

279
00:11:11,889 --> 00:11:13,138
Shit.
You look good.

280
00:11:13,190 --> 00:11:15,057
- Thanks. So do you.
- Thank you.

281
00:11:15,109 --> 00:11:18,110
Uh, Patrick, this is James.
James, Patrick.

282
00:11:18,145 --> 00:11:20,229
James thinks you're adorable,
and you're both single.

283
00:11:20,281 --> 00:11:21,948
So you guys should discuss
this while we go get drinks.

284
00:11:21,949 --> 00:11:23,615
Okay. All right.

285
00:11:23,651 --> 00:11:24,609
- Okay.
- Well you just...

286
00:11:24,610 --> 00:11:25,567
The drinks are that way.

287
00:11:25,569 --> 00:11:29,822
- Bilbo Faggins, looking cute!
- Sorry about that. Eddie's a lot.

288
00:11:29,874 --> 00:11:31,740
Yeah.
You're, uh, you're, uh...

289
00:11:31,792 --> 00:11:33,625
Link from Legend of Zelda,
right?

290
00:11:33,661 --> 00:11:35,544
- Uh, Legolas.
- Mm.

291
00:11:35,579 --> 00:11:37,746
We had this whole Lord of
the Cockrings thing going,

292
00:11:37,798 --> 00:11:40,299
- but everyone got lost and...
- So like the movie?

293
00:11:40,334 --> 00:11:43,635
- Yeah, I guess so.
- Oh. Will you excuse me for a second?

294
00:11:43,671 --> 00:11:45,421
- Sure.
- Hey!

295
00:11:45,473 --> 00:11:46,286
- Hey.
- Yes!

296
00:11:46,287 --> 00:11:50,726
This is the best Gordon
Freeman costume I've ever seen!

297
00:11:50,761 --> 00:11:52,928
- Thanks.
- You... you made this?

298
00:11:52,930 --> 00:11:56,815
- Uh, most of it, yeah. Uh...
- Hey! Guess who I am?

299
00:11:56,851 --> 00:11:58,934
Um, shot in the dark,
I'm gonna say Carrie.

300
00:11:58,986 --> 00:12:00,936
See, bitch?
[Laughs]

301
00:12:00,938 --> 00:12:03,105
I told her people would
think she's an angry tampon,

302
00:12:03,107 --> 00:12:04,740
- and I stand by that.
- Wow.

303
00:12:04,775 --> 00:12:07,025
I'm gonna make us drinks.
Do you like whiskey?

304
00:12:07,078 --> 00:12:09,745
I like whiskey.
I know you like whiskey.

305
00:12:09,780 --> 00:12:11,914
- Yes, I do.
- You like anything.

306
00:12:11,949 --> 00:12:14,416
- BRB!
- Okay.

307
00:12:14,452 --> 00:12:17,753
They're a little intense
when they get together.

308
00:12:17,788 --> 00:12:19,288
Yeah, he's got a lot of energy.

309
00:12:19,290 --> 00:12:22,508
- [Laughs] Be nice.
- What?

310
00:12:22,543 --> 00:12:24,042
[Laughs] He's all revved up.

311
00:12:24,095 --> 00:12:25,361
His article just went
viral this week, so...

312
00:12:25,362 --> 00:12:26,628
Oh, that's exciting.

313
00:12:26,680 --> 00:12:29,298
Yeah, he's the youngest writer at
"SF Weekly" to get that many views.

314
00:12:29,350 --> 00:12:32,351
Wow, that's a real...
That's a real accomplishment.

315
00:12:32,386 --> 00:12:35,471
I'm serious, I'm serious. I'm
really... I'm happy that you came,

316
00:12:35,473 --> 00:12:37,356
and I'm happy
that you brought Brady.

317
00:12:37,391 --> 00:12:40,192
- Thanks. He's a lot of fun.
- Yeah, definitely.

318
00:12:40,227 --> 00:12:42,895
I mean, he's not
as much fun as me, but...

319
00:12:42,947 --> 00:12:45,447
He's way more fun than you.
[Laughs]

320
00:12:45,483 --> 00:12:48,317
- Wait, seriously? I thought...
- Who's thirsty?

321
00:12:48,319 --> 00:12:51,320
Okay, thank you!

322
00:12:51,322 --> 00:12:53,872
- Cheers.
- Cheers.

323
00:12:53,908 --> 00:12:56,375
Cheers!

324
00:12:56,410 --> 00:12:58,827
- Cheers.
- Cheers.

325
00:12:58,829 --> 00:13:02,047
Fuck! You two are so cute.

326
00:13:02,082 --> 00:13:05,501
I'm serious, you guys are
like "put a ring on it" cute.

327
00:13:05,553 --> 00:13:06,736
Hold on, hold on.

328
00:13:06,737 --> 00:13:07,920
- Will you hold this?
- Okay.

329
00:13:07,972 --> 00:13:11,306
- Oh my God.
- All right, do some sweet shit.

330
00:13:11,342 --> 00:13:14,843
Come on.
Make it real cute, real cute.

331
00:13:14,845 --> 00:13:17,179
Okay, last one, last one.

332
00:13:17,181 --> 00:13:21,016
Okay. All right, all right.
One more. Selfie, selfie.

333
00:13:21,068 --> 00:13:22,794
So basically I just
make sure that the

334
00:13:22,795 --> 00:13:24,520
applicants have their
paperwork in order.

335
00:13:24,572 --> 00:13:27,356
It's not a lot of fun, but
it pays pretty well.

336
00:13:27,408 --> 00:13:29,550
I heard you... listen,
I gotta go, um...

337
00:13:29,551 --> 00:13:31,693
Check on the chips.

338
00:13:31,695 --> 00:13:33,245
I'll see you.

339
00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:34,997
You know, I thought it was
really important to push for,

340
00:13:35,032 --> 00:13:38,283
because it's a kind of
homophobia that's hard to clock,

341
00:13:38,335 --> 00:13:40,035
but it's sex shame.

342
00:13:40,087 --> 00:13:42,204
If there's a pill
that can prevent HIV,

343
00:13:42,206 --> 00:13:43,539
everyone should take it.

344
00:13:43,541 --> 00:13:45,290
Believe me, I would've
been the first in line.

345
00:13:45,342 --> 00:13:47,960
Yeah, but taking a pill just
so you can fuck? I mean...

346
00:13:48,012 --> 00:13:50,345
Yeah, it's like
birth control, actually.

347
00:13:50,381 --> 00:13:52,047
It's not really the same.

348
00:13:52,049 --> 00:13:54,800
In the same way that
birth control liberates women,

349
00:13:54,852 --> 00:13:57,553
- PrEP can liberate gay men.
- Yeah.

350
00:13:57,555 --> 00:14:00,889
How does having unprotected
sex liberate anyone?

351
00:14:00,891 --> 00:14:04,226
Right? I mean, what's so bad
about using condoms?

352
00:14:04,278 --> 00:14:08,647
Well, you're actually supposed to
continue using condoms while on PrEP.

353
00:14:10,651 --> 00:14:12,635
Okay, but the thing
about using condoms

354
00:14:12,636 --> 00:14:14,620
is the only reason
people use condoms

355
00:14:14,655 --> 00:14:16,955
is 'cause they have
a fear of dying of HIV.

356
00:14:16,991 --> 00:14:18,407
Well, you can't die from HIV.
I mean, we know that.

357
00:14:18,459 --> 00:14:19,992
I know you can't die of HIV.

358
00:14:20,044 --> 00:14:22,995
That's not what I'm saying.
What I'm... trying to say,

359
00:14:23,047 --> 00:14:27,082
is that someone who doesn't even have
HIV, and isn't even taking PrEP,

360
00:14:27,134 --> 00:14:29,026
shouldn't probably
be telling people...

361
00:14:29,027 --> 00:14:30,919
I do take PrEP.

362
00:14:30,921 --> 00:14:32,254
What?

363
00:14:32,256 --> 00:14:35,507
The article's called "Why I take PrEP."

364
00:14:35,559 --> 00:14:38,260
[Laughing]

365
00:14:38,262 --> 00:14:40,263
I don't think you
have to read the

366
00:14:40,264 --> 00:14:42,264
article, per se, to
get what the point is.

367
00:14:42,266 --> 00:14:44,066
Which is what?

368
00:14:48,105 --> 00:14:50,147
Okay! Well, you know a
party's really awesome

369
00:14:50,148 --> 00:14:52,190
when everyone starts
to talk about AIDS.

370
00:14:52,243 --> 00:14:54,576
[Laughter]
Um, as fun as this is for me,

371
00:14:54,612 --> 00:14:57,279
I'm gonna go to the bathroom right
now and jerk off to feline leukemia.

372
00:14:57,331 --> 00:14:58,914
Ooh!
[Laughter]

373
00:14:58,949 --> 00:15:01,533
- What's feline leukemia?
- It's pussy cancer.

374
00:15:01,585 --> 00:15:03,585
[Laughter]

375
00:15:03,621 --> 00:15:08,290
- Well said, Doris.
- Thank you. I wanna educate.

376
00:15:08,292 --> 00:15:11,710
[Urinating]

377
00:15:11,762 --> 00:15:14,963
Don't go to the Endup.
What do you mean?

378
00:15:14,965 --> 00:15:17,382
I mean I want you
to spend the night with me.

379
00:15:17,434 --> 00:15:19,217
Honey, I'm not a snuggler.

380
00:15:19,270 --> 00:15:22,387
Okay, we don't gotta snuggle. I'll
build a pillow wall between us.

381
00:15:22,439 --> 00:15:27,142
[Laughs] Agustin, I told you,
okay, when we talked about this,

382
00:15:27,144 --> 00:15:28,144
- that when we started...
- We don't gotta

383
00:15:28,145 --> 00:15:29,144
label it if you
don't want to.

384
00:15:29,196 --> 00:15:30,296
Okay, we're not gonna
use labels, okay?

385
00:15:30,297 --> 00:15:31,396
I know it freaks
some people out.

386
00:15:31,448 --> 00:15:33,649
I like you, okay?
I like you,

387
00:15:33,651 --> 00:15:36,285
and I wanna see what you
smell like in the morning.

388
00:15:36,320 --> 00:15:38,570
- I bet it's the worst.
- [Laughs] It is the worst!

389
00:15:38,622 --> 00:15:40,872
[Knocking]
Hey, there's a line out here!

390
00:15:40,908 --> 00:15:42,491
Here, give me.

391
00:15:47,131 --> 00:15:48,997
- She's all yours.
- Sorry.

392
00:15:49,049 --> 00:15:50,832
Yum, yum.
I smell drugs.

393
00:15:50,884 --> 00:15:51,883
Really?

394
00:15:51,919 --> 00:15:54,636
Yeah, yeah.
By the way, your girl...

395
00:15:54,672 --> 00:15:56,888
She's a tough one.

396
00:15:56,924 --> 00:16:00,309
You know, when I fall
for someone, I fall hard,

397
00:16:00,344 --> 00:16:03,145
and I think I might have
scared her.

398
00:16:03,180 --> 00:16:06,348
Yeah, you did...

399
00:16:06,350 --> 00:16:08,835
But I'm pretty sure
that's just because

400
00:16:08,836 --> 00:16:11,320
she feels the
same way about you.

401
00:16:11,355 --> 00:16:14,740
- Yeah?
- Shh.

402
00:16:14,775 --> 00:16:18,193
Oh, come on, Doris's BFF.

403
00:16:18,245 --> 00:16:20,112
All right, dude.
Good looking, man.

404
00:16:20,164 --> 00:16:22,581
Whoa, that is a titty
and a half!

405
00:16:22,616 --> 00:16:25,751
No, this is two titties. Technically,
it's four halves. Go ahead.

406
00:16:25,786 --> 00:16:28,203
[Laughs] May I?
Yes!

407
00:16:28,255 --> 00:16:30,122
As long as Doris don't see.
She might be weird about it.

408
00:16:30,174 --> 00:16:31,506
That is...
Oh!

409
00:16:31,542 --> 00:16:34,676
[Mellow rock plays]

410
00:16:51,779 --> 00:16:54,062
[Gulping]

411
00:17:01,905 --> 00:17:03,405
You're so beautiful.

412
00:17:03,457 --> 00:17:05,490
Hey!
Are you serious right now?

413
00:17:05,542 --> 00:17:06,626
I don't know, am I?

414
00:17:06,627 --> 00:17:08,794
What am I, your
sloppy party leftovers?

415
00:17:08,829 --> 00:17:10,996
- Happy Halloween, dick.
- What?

416
00:17:11,048 --> 00:17:12,881
Your playlist is garbage.

417
00:17:12,916 --> 00:17:15,417
This playlist
is fucking awesome, okay?

418
00:17:15,419 --> 00:17:18,804
- I quite fancy this song.
- What?

419
00:17:18,839 --> 00:17:22,174
- Hey. I know we didn't RSVP...
- Who's "we"?

420
00:17:22,226 --> 00:17:24,176
But I thought
you wouldn't mind if...

421
00:17:24,228 --> 00:17:26,595
Uh, Patrick, you remember Jon.

422
00:17:26,647 --> 00:17:28,730
Dude, amazing party!

423
00:17:28,766 --> 00:17:30,766
It's really good.
The city is nuts tonight.

424
00:17:30,768 --> 00:17:33,018
- It is nuts.
- Totally nuts.

425
00:17:33,070 --> 00:17:36,855
We saw a guy on the street,
balls out, balls out!

426
00:17:36,907 --> 00:17:38,940
- Ah!
- It was crazy.

427
00:17:38,992 --> 00:17:42,077
- That is so crazy.
- You know what we need?

428
00:17:42,112 --> 00:17:46,448
- Fucking... booze.
- That's right.

429
00:17:46,450 --> 00:17:48,867
Are you fucking kidding me right now?
This cannot be happening.

430
00:17:48,919 --> 00:17:50,419
I thought you wanted
to be a grown-up about this...

431
00:17:50,454 --> 00:17:52,454
What is grown up about bringing
your boyfriend to the house

432
00:17:52,456 --> 00:17:54,673
of the guy that you were
fucking cheating on him with?

433
00:17:54,708 --> 00:17:57,209
- Christ, Patrick, can you...
- Can I what, Kevin? Can I what?

434
00:17:57,261 --> 00:17:59,461
Okay, this is my party. All right?
It's my party, and I'm gonna...

435
00:17:59,513 --> 00:18:01,763
I'm gonna just say
what I want to say.

436
00:18:01,799 --> 00:18:03,799
Miss me?

437
00:18:05,302 --> 00:18:08,220
Excuse me for a second. Okay?

438
00:18:10,224 --> 00:18:12,140
- Hey, Paddy, you all right?
- Yeah, I'm great.

439
00:18:12,142 --> 00:18:13,558
I can ask them to leave
if you want me to.

440
00:18:13,610 --> 00:18:16,645
No, Dom, it's a fun gay party!
Why would we do that?

441
00:18:18,732 --> 00:18:20,816
You didn't sign up for karaoke?

442
00:18:20,868 --> 00:18:23,985
I love
your mega man costume.

443
00:18:23,987 --> 00:18:26,822
[Woman laughing]

444
00:18:28,242 --> 00:18:30,242
Hey, Paddy. Just...

445
00:18:30,294 --> 00:18:32,327
[Music shuts off]
What are you doing?

446
00:18:32,379 --> 00:18:35,664
[Feedback] Hello! Hello!
Is this thing on?

447
00:18:35,716 --> 00:18:38,667
Ah! Happy Halloween, everybody!

448
00:18:38,669 --> 00:18:41,720
[Cheering]

449
00:18:41,755 --> 00:18:44,473
I just wanted to say thank you,
everyone, for coming.

450
00:18:44,508 --> 00:18:47,259
This is mine and...
Me and Agustin's party.

451
00:18:47,311 --> 00:18:49,478
We never have parties,
but this year I was like,

452
00:18:49,513 --> 00:18:52,063
"I wanna be a fun gay,
and fun gays have parties."

453
00:18:52,099 --> 00:18:57,652
So this is my party!
[Crowd cheers]

454
00:18:57,688 --> 00:19:00,572
I wanna know, though,
why is nobody singing karaoke?

455
00:19:00,607 --> 00:19:02,733
I mean, do people not
sing karaoke anymore?

456
00:19:02,734 --> 00:19:04,860
That's so weird, right?

457
00:19:04,912 --> 00:19:08,196
Well, later we'll sing.
But I just wanted tonight to say

458
00:19:08,198 --> 00:19:10,198
thank you, everyone,
for coming.

459
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,868
I wanted to say
all my friends are here.

460
00:19:12,870 --> 00:19:14,452
Dom is here.
You all know Dom, right?

461
00:19:14,505 --> 00:19:17,005
He-Man,
Master of the Universe is here.

462
00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:18,790
Dom is actually
opening a restaurant.

463
00:19:18,842 --> 00:19:21,042
Well, it's not really
a restaurant, it's like...

464
00:19:21,044 --> 00:19:23,545
It's a chicken window.
I don't know what that is.

465
00:19:23,547 --> 00:19:27,549
He's gonna sell windows out of his
chicken and it's gonna be great.

466
00:19:27,601 --> 00:19:31,469
But he doesn't have any money. So
if we... could you... excuse me, yes.

467
00:19:31,522 --> 00:19:33,722
Thank you so much.
I'm gonna take this hat,

468
00:19:33,774 --> 00:19:35,541
and we're gonna pass
it around and we're

469
00:19:35,542 --> 00:19:37,309
gonna do a collection,
like church.

470
00:19:37,361 --> 00:19:39,978
- So if you have bills...
- You don't have to do that.

471
00:19:40,030 --> 00:19:42,814
No, Dom, shut up. I love you.
I love your chicken.

472
00:19:42,866 --> 00:19:44,950
Just pass that shit around and
we're gonna raise some money.

473
00:19:44,985 --> 00:19:46,985
And this is Agustin!

474
00:19:47,037 --> 00:19:49,120
And he's here
because he lives here.

475
00:19:49,156 --> 00:19:51,957
Also because he looks amazing.

476
00:19:51,992 --> 00:19:54,125
And he called me
Clarissa Dalloway earlier.

477
00:19:54,161 --> 00:19:56,044
So if anybody knows what that
means, you can let me know.

478
00:19:56,079 --> 00:19:58,713
That would be great, but I wanna
talk to you for real, Agustin.

479
00:19:58,749 --> 00:20:00,832
Put the drink down
and look at me in the eyes.

480
00:20:00,884 --> 00:20:03,919
And I wanna say...
Excuse me, sorry. [Sniffles]

481
00:20:03,971 --> 00:20:06,072
I'm really proud
of you, because you

482
00:20:06,073 --> 00:20:08,173
have really turned
it around this year.

483
00:20:08,225 --> 00:20:12,093
You're become thoughtful, and helpful,
and you take care of trans kids,

484
00:20:12,145 --> 00:20:16,431
and a rent check would be nice,
but I'm not gonna push it, right?

485
00:20:16,483 --> 00:20:19,234
Right? Richie?
Richie knows.

486
00:20:19,269 --> 00:20:21,820
Richie knows because...
Richie, this is crazy,

487
00:20:21,855 --> 00:20:25,106
but Richie actually picked
Agustin up off the street

488
00:20:25,158 --> 00:20:28,910
when he was on drugs. That's because
Richie's such a good person,

489
00:20:28,946 --> 00:20:30,912
and I think that we should all
raise a glass.

490
00:20:30,948 --> 00:20:33,114
If I could just, Carrie,
have your red punch.

491
00:20:33,166 --> 00:20:38,169
And raise a glass to Richie, and don't
think I forgot about you over there,

492
00:20:38,205 --> 00:20:40,789
laughing behind Richie.
That's Brady.

493
00:20:40,791 --> 00:20:44,042
Uh, which turns out
is Richie's soulmate.

494
00:20:45,462 --> 00:20:47,679
So... yeah, there's that.

495
00:20:47,714 --> 00:20:50,932
He's also actually,
I learned this evening,

496
00:20:50,968 --> 00:20:55,303
the gay Dr. Ruth. So if anybody needs
their truvada prescription filled,

497
00:20:55,355 --> 00:20:59,307
that ginger over there in the crown
is the one you go to, all right?

498
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,444
You go, you guys. Cheers.
And also to...

499
00:21:02,479 --> 00:21:05,113
While we're at it, I'd like to
raise a glass to my boss, Kevin.

500
00:21:05,148 --> 00:21:09,317
Kevin, hi!
Look, Owen, it's Kevin and Jon!

501
00:21:09,369 --> 00:21:11,152
His longtime boyfriend!
Isn't it great

502
00:21:11,154 --> 00:21:13,321
when two gay guys can
just work it out like that?

503
00:21:13,323 --> 00:21:15,824
I think it's amazing.
So I just wanted to say, Kevin,

504
00:21:15,876 --> 00:21:17,993
these last few weeks
have been so special.

505
00:21:17,995 --> 00:21:19,770
In particular, that
time a couple weeks

506
00:21:19,771 --> 00:21:21,546
ago when we were
alone at the office...

507
00:21:21,581 --> 00:21:23,357
No, no, no! I haven't
gotten the chance...

508
00:21:23,358 --> 00:21:25,133
no, I am Gordon
Freeman, okay?

509
00:21:25,168 --> 00:21:28,169
He's the most popular video
game character of all time!

510
00:21:28,221 --> 00:21:31,172
Okay, Gordon Freeman! How do
you people not know that?

511
00:21:31,224 --> 00:21:32,366
You know who that is, right?

512
00:21:32,367 --> 00:21:33,508
Make sure no one uploads
any videos on YouTube.

513
00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:36,478
He's a video game character.

514
00:21:36,513 --> 00:21:39,180
- Shit.
- Motherfucker.

515
00:21:39,182 --> 00:21:41,683
That was a train wreck.

516
00:21:41,685 --> 00:21:45,987
Apparently, Patrick's little
breakdown only got us about,

517
00:21:46,023 --> 00:21:47,822
what, $12, $13.

518
00:21:47,858 --> 00:21:49,524
It's okay, we can buy
a new, little chicken with it.

519
00:21:49,576 --> 00:21:52,527
- Our first chicken.
- Where's Malik?

520
00:21:52,579 --> 00:21:54,329
He is in the car.
He's changing his shoes.

521
00:21:54,364 --> 00:21:56,197
He's kind of done
with the whole Cher thing.

522
00:21:56,249 --> 00:21:58,867
He's really great.
You know that, right?

523
00:21:58,919 --> 00:22:01,169
Oh, really? What, did he rim you
or something?

524
00:22:01,204 --> 00:22:02,688
- No.
- You gotta watch that guy.

525
00:22:02,689 --> 00:22:04,172
He loves ass.

526
00:22:04,207 --> 00:22:05,707
- He's all up in it.
- Doris.

527
00:22:05,759 --> 00:22:07,876
Yeah, I know, okay? I know he's great.
I know he's great.

528
00:22:07,928 --> 00:22:10,345
I know he's great.
He's a little too great.

529
00:22:10,380 --> 00:22:12,180
It's scaring the shit out of me.
I'm not...

530
00:22:12,215 --> 00:22:14,015
I don't like the whole
couple's costume thing too,

531
00:22:14,051 --> 00:22:15,967
I wish we hadn't done it.
It's freaking me out.

532
00:22:16,019 --> 00:22:18,136
'Cause Sonny and Cher?
Ugh.

533
00:22:18,188 --> 00:22:19,471
You know how that turned out.

534
00:22:19,523 --> 00:22:22,474
Do you know what I think?
[Sighs] What?

535
00:22:22,526 --> 00:22:24,726
I think you two
are great together.

536
00:22:24,728 --> 00:22:27,195
Man.
Oh my God.

537
00:22:27,230 --> 00:22:29,948
- These shoes are no joke.
- Hey!

538
00:22:29,983 --> 00:22:32,901
[Sighs] Fuck.

539
00:22:32,903 --> 00:22:34,736
You know,
if it's any consolation,

540
00:22:34,738 --> 00:22:37,539
there was only one suicide during
Clarissa Dalloway's parties.

541
00:22:37,574 --> 00:22:39,207
- I still don't know who that is.
- Your party's been way better.

542
00:22:39,242 --> 00:22:40,492
I still don't know who that is.

543
00:22:40,544 --> 00:22:42,243
It's Virginia Woolf,
"Mrs Dalloway."

544
00:22:42,295 --> 00:22:46,414
Well, that was...
That was quite a speech.

545
00:22:50,887 --> 00:22:53,755
- Sorry, do you mind if...
- Yeah, actually, I do mind.

546
00:22:53,757 --> 00:22:57,142
Agustin, it's fine.
Really.

547
00:23:08,655 --> 00:23:11,573
I don't know what I was thinking.
I'm sorry.

548
00:23:11,608 --> 00:23:14,275
I'm drunk, and we were at a bar
around the corner...

549
00:23:14,327 --> 00:23:17,529
I don't want you
to go to Seattle.

550
00:23:17,581 --> 00:23:21,332
I don't want us being weird to be
the reason I never see you again.

551
00:23:23,253 --> 00:23:27,622
- Patrick...
- I'd miss you too much if you go.

552
00:23:32,629 --> 00:23:35,213
Here you two are.

553
00:23:35,265 --> 00:23:39,434
I thought the party was inside.

554
00:23:39,469 --> 00:23:42,771
I just came to get
the karaoke sign-up sheet.

555
00:23:42,806 --> 00:23:45,607
- Seen it?
- Yeah, I've got that.

556
00:23:48,061 --> 00:23:52,030
I will, uh,
I'll just unfold it.

557
00:23:52,065 --> 00:23:54,282
You know,
'cause I slay Celine Dion.

558
00:23:54,317 --> 00:23:55,650
I really do.
Don't I, babe?

559
00:23:55,652 --> 00:23:57,152
Oh my God.
You do, yes.

560
00:23:57,204 --> 00:23:59,821
- Fuck yeah, I do.
- Fuck yeah.

561
00:24:03,794 --> 00:24:08,413
- Is everything all right?
- Mm-hm. You?

562
00:24:08,465 --> 00:24:11,749
Yeah.

563
00:24:11,802 --> 00:24:13,001
Can we go?

564
00:24:13,003 --> 00:24:14,085
Really?

565
00:24:14,137 --> 00:24:17,922
Hm... Yeah,
fuck me, I'm tired,

566
00:24:17,974 --> 00:24:20,258
and I'm drunk.

567
00:24:20,310 --> 00:24:24,229
Um, I'm... I'm drunk.

568
00:24:26,183 --> 00:24:28,650
Okay.

569
00:24:31,104 --> 00:24:32,320
Happy Halloween, Patrick.

570
00:24:35,192 --> 00:24:37,192
The happiest.

571
00:24:41,081 --> 00:24:43,448
Good luck in Seattle.

572
00:24:43,500 --> 00:24:45,950
I hope everything
works out the way you want.

573
00:24:48,038 --> 00:24:49,587
What does that mean?

574
00:24:52,342 --> 00:24:54,425
[Music plays on karaoke machine]

575
00:25:00,884 --> 00:25:03,768
[Singing indistinctly]

576
00:25:05,188 --> 00:25:08,890
♪ He did the mash ♪
♪ he did the monster mash ♪

577
00:25:08,942 --> 00:25:12,310
♪ the monster mash ♪
♪ it was a graveyard smash.

578
00:25:12,362 --> 00:25:15,980
♪ He did the mash ♪
♪ it caught on in a flash ♪

579
00:25:16,032 --> 00:25:19,734
♪ he did the mash ♪
♪ the monster mash.

580
00:25:19,786 --> 00:25:23,037
♪ Aah-ooh ♪

581
00:25:23,073 --> 00:25:26,407
♪ waah-ooh ♪

582
00:25:26,409 --> 00:25:30,078
♪ wah-wah-ooh ♪

583
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:31,996
♪ wah-ooh ♪

584
00:25:33,466 --> 00:25:36,801
♪ they did the mash ♪
♪ they did the monster mash ♪

585
00:25:36,836 --> 00:25:40,588
♪ the monster mash ♪
♪ it was a graveyard smash.

586
00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:43,675
♪ They did the mash ♪
♪ it caught on in a flash.

587
00:25:43,727 --> 00:25:47,428
♪ They did the mash ♪
♪ they did the monster mash ♪

588
00:25:47,430 --> 00:25:49,847
♪ wah-ooh ♪

589
00:25:49,900 --> 00:25:53,601
♪ shoop, wah-ooh ♪

590
00:25:53,603 --> 00:25:56,938
♪ shoop-wah-ooh ♪

591
00:25:56,990 --> 00:26:00,441
♪ shoop, wah-ooh ♪

592
00:26:00,493 --> 00:26:03,878
<b>- sync and corrections by Zac -
- www.addic7ed.com -</b>

593
00:26:05,882 --> 00:26:08,983
♪ too long ♪

594
00:26:09,019 --> 00:26:10,952
♪ ooh ♪

595
00:26:10,987 --> 00:26:14,355
♪ I've been loving you, oh ♪

596
00:26:15,559 --> 00:26:17,492
♪ too long ♪

597
00:26:19,396 --> 00:26:22,730
♪ so come down from the clouds ♪

598
00:26:24,100 --> 00:26:26,134
♪ come down on me ♪

599
00:26:28,104 --> 00:26:31,439
♪ so come down from the clouds ♪

600
00:26:33,009 --> 00:26:34,776
♪ come down on me ♪

601
00:26:37,981 --> 00:26:40,014
♪ when you're so high ♪

602
00:26:40,050 --> 00:26:44,285
♪ you don't think ♪

603
00:26:46,423 --> 00:26:48,890
♪ when you fall from the sky ♪

604
00:26:48,925 --> 00:26:52,994
♪ you won't break ♪

605
00:26:54,798 --> 00:26:57,432
♪ I've been loving you ♪

606
00:26:59,269 --> 00:27:01,436
♪ too long ♪

607
00:27:04,274 --> 00:27:06,507
♪ I've been loving you ♪

608
00:27:06,543 --> 00:27:11,079
♪ for too long ♪

