1
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<b><font color="#0E7521">Ripped By mstoll
Happy New Year 2016 - New Year, New Color ;-)</font></b>

2
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<i>[TV. Male Reporter]
A tragic ferry accident today.</i>

3
00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:50,786
<i>Apparently a ferry rammed into
the shoreline at full speed...</i>

4
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<i>near a local power plant there.</i>

5
00:01:53,293 --> 00:01:56,729
<i>There are multiple fatalities
and injuries reported at this hour.</i>

6
00:01:56,797 --> 00:02:00,699
That's really depressing. And how do you lose
control of a ferry? They're slow as shit.

7
00:02:00,767 --> 00:02:02,257
- Guy must've been drunk.
- Yeah.

8
00:02:02,335 --> 00:02:05,827
Hey-yo! Check out my new threads.
Picked them up at the airport.

9
00:02:05,906 --> 00:02:08,841
- What were you doing at the airport?
- Just farting around.

10
00:02:08,909 --> 00:02:11,810
- I found this shop full of this stuff. Look at that!
- Hoo!

11
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I got some for everybody.

12
00:02:13,213 --> 00:02:16,080
"Life is happy"? What the hell is that?

13
00:02:16,149 --> 00:02:19,050
Well, it's clothing that
supports a positive message.

14
00:02:19,119 --> 00:02:23,249
I mean, you wear it,
and you celebrate that life is happy, baby.

15
00:02:23,323 --> 00:02:27,384
<i>In other news, a man is
in custody for murder of a state witness...</i>

16
00:02:27,461 --> 00:02:31,329
<i>who was brutally beheaded
by an assailant wielding a stop sign.</i>

17
00:02:31,398 --> 00:02:34,492
A man seeking justice
is beheaded by a maniac with a stop sign.

18
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- You're right, Frank. Life is happy.
<i>- The suspect in custody...</i>

19
00:02:37,304 --> 00:02:40,865
<i>is a 59-year-old repeat felon
by the name of Luther McDonald.</i>

20
00:02:40,941 --> 00:02:42,499
Holy shit! That's my dad!

21
00:02:42,576 --> 00:02:45,875
<i>If convicted, McDonald
could face the death penalty.</i>

22
00:02:45,946 --> 00:02:49,074
Can you believe what they're saying about my
dad having killed that guy?

23
00:02:49,149 --> 00:02:50,138
- Mmm...
- Yeah.

24
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Yeah, why wouldn't I believe that?

25
00:02:52,085 --> 00:02:53,677
No way. This has gotta be bullshit.

26
00:02:53,753 --> 00:02:55,880
He's innocent.
I'm not gonna let the state kill him.

27
00:02:55,956 --> 00:02:58,550
I'm gonna save my dad's life.

28
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<i>[Woman On PA, Indistinct]</i>

29
00:03:24,684 --> 00:03:25,673
Thanks for coming.

30
00:03:25,752 --> 00:03:26,741
You're forcing me.

31
00:03:26,820 --> 00:03:28,117
- Yeah, well...
- I'm here.

32
00:03:28,188 --> 00:03:29,212
Of course.

33
00:03:29,289 --> 00:03:31,018
We gotta show support for
my dad, right?

34
00:03:31,091 --> 00:03:33,321
Gotta let him know
that <i>we</i> know he <i>didn't</i> do it.

35
00:03:33,393 --> 00:03:35,486
- I know, but I believe that he did, so...
- Well...

36
00:03:35,562 --> 00:03:37,052
- Are you gonna be cool?
- I'll be cool.

37
00:03:37,130 --> 00:03:39,564
As long as he doesn't ask us
to shove heroin up our ass again...

38
00:03:39,633 --> 00:03:41,498
- I'll be cool.
- He might, and I might do it.

39
00:03:41,568 --> 00:03:43,661
- [Buzzer]
- You would enjoy it. Here he comes.

40
00:03:43,737 --> 00:03:45,227
Oh, here he comes.

41
00:03:45,305 --> 00:03:47,034
Oh, Dad! He looks great, huh?

42
00:03:47,107 --> 00:03:49,769
Dad! Dad! Hey! How are you?

43
00:03:49,843 --> 00:03:52,710
It's been so long!
I brought a picture of Mom here...

44
00:03:52,779 --> 00:03:54,508
just to make you feel more at home.

45
00:03:54,581 --> 00:03:57,209
She looks good, right?

46
00:03:57,284 --> 00:04:00,742
- And, uh, what about me? How do I look?
Do I look cool? - Give it a rest.

47
00:04:00,820 --> 00:04:03,084
- Do I look cool?
- What do you want?

48
00:04:03,156 --> 00:04:05,954
We just wanted to come by
and tell you that...

49
00:04:06,026 --> 00:04:09,018
we believe that there is no way
that you did this.

50
00:04:10,430 --> 00:04:12,159
You didn't do it, right, Dad?

51
00:04:14,067 --> 00:04:15,398
No.

52
00:04:15,468 --> 00:04:17,436
Right.
I knew it! I knew it.

53
00:04:17,504 --> 00:04:19,768
Another innocent man being
railroaded by the system.

54
00:04:19,839 --> 00:04:21,830
Besides, there's no way
that you could've done this.

55
00:04:21,908 --> 00:04:25,241
You have a bad shoulder, and that's why you
could never have a catch with me, remember?

56
00:04:26,413 --> 00:04:27,903
- Right.
- Yeah.

57
00:04:27,981 --> 00:04:31,348
Charlie and I want to let you
know that we will not rest...

58
00:04:31,418 --> 00:04:32,908
until you are proven innocent.

59
00:04:32,986 --> 00:04:37,719
Look, I got a lawyer appointed to me.
It'll be fine.

60
00:04:37,791 --> 00:04:42,490
Uh, sorry. Mr. Mac, you really don't want to put
your life in the hands of a public defender.

61
00:04:42,562 --> 00:04:44,496
I mean, those guys are absolute clowns.

62
00:04:44,564 --> 00:04:47,499
I tell you what. I'd be interested
to take a look at your case...

63
00:04:47,567 --> 00:04:49,660
you know, if you want a little outside help.

64
00:04:49,736 --> 00:04:52,102
I specialize in bird law mostly,
but I know my way...

65
00:04:52,172 --> 00:04:56,006
Stay out of this! Both of you!

66
00:04:56,076 --> 00:05:00,570
I do <i>not</i> want you stirring things up!

67
00:05:02,115 --> 00:05:03,844
You hear me?

68
00:05:03,917 --> 00:05:06,317
Yeah, I-I-I hear you, Dad.

69
00:05:06,386 --> 00:05:09,014
One last thing though. I love you.

70
00:05:09,089 --> 00:05:12,923
And I...
Oh, I love you! I love you, Dad!

71
00:05:12,993 --> 00:05:15,461
- I love you! He can't hear me 'cause of this...
- He definitely heard you.

72
00:05:15,528 --> 00:05:17,325
- The glass is too thick.
- His ear was on the...

73
00:05:17,397 --> 00:05:19,160
- I think there's something wrong with that.
- [Taps]

74
00:05:19,232 --> 00:05:20,961
- Yeah. Sure.
- All right.

75
00:05:22,435 --> 00:05:24,528
<i>We're now being told
the ferry captain was...</i>

76
00:05:24,604 --> 00:05:29,200
<i>intentionally trying to steer the ferry into
the nearby power plant.</i>

77
00:05:29,275 --> 00:05:32,540
<i>The captain has tested negative
for alcohol and drugs.</i>

78
00:05:32,612 --> 00:05:34,102
The guy wasn't even drunk.

79
00:05:34,180 --> 00:05:37,047
This was a sober man purposely steering a
ship into a power plant.

80
00:05:37,117 --> 00:05:39,483
God, the world is a very depressing place.

81
00:05:39,552 --> 00:05:43,283
You guys are depressing.
I'm trying to enjoy my cone over here.

82
00:05:43,356 --> 00:05:46,519
- Turn that crap off!
- [Man Chuckling] Yeah, baby!

83
00:05:46,593 --> 00:05:48,823
There they are! The usual suspects.

84
00:05:48,895 --> 00:05:51,523
Pondy! Just the man I want to see.

85
00:05:51,598 --> 00:05:53,327
Now this man loves life.

86
00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:57,359
I'd love to get into some shots.
Line 'em up, Frankie. Line them up!

87
00:05:57,437 --> 00:05:59,598
Now we got some positive vibes in here.

88
00:05:59,673 --> 00:06:01,402
You are his AA sponsor, right?

89
00:06:01,474 --> 00:06:03,635
[Chuckles]
Never change, Dee. I love it.

90
00:06:03,710 --> 00:06:06,235
Come on.
Do a shot with me. Shot! Shot!

91
00:06:06,312 --> 00:06:08,473
I feel like a shot might
make me feel better.

92
00:06:08,548 --> 00:06:10,709
- I think I need a shot at this point.
- All right.

93
00:06:10,784 --> 00:06:12,513
- Let's go, Frank. All right.
- To the brim!

94
00:06:12,585 --> 00:06:15,145
You're looking pretty dapper there, Bill.
You hittin' it hard, or what?

95
00:06:15,221 --> 00:06:17,985
- I'm celebrating today, baby.
- What's the special occasion?

96
00:06:18,058 --> 00:06:19,548
I'm gonna kill myself.

97
00:06:21,761 --> 00:06:25,060
- What?
- Yeah, no, no. I'm gonna drink myself to death.

98
00:06:25,131 --> 00:06:28,498
Yeah, I botched it. Life, you know?

99
00:06:28,568 --> 00:06:31,059
Old B.P. Had a good run though, you know?

100
00:06:31,137 --> 00:06:34,698
It's like there's this tiny, little soul man
in my body driving me around.

101
00:06:34,774 --> 00:06:39,006
That little soul man's ready to power old Bill
down and move on to the next party monster.

102
00:06:39,079 --> 00:06:41,912
Oh, come on. You guys own a bar.

103
00:06:41,981 --> 00:06:44,415
You watch people slowly
kill themselves every day, am I right?

104
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[Wheezing Laugh]

105
00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:48,615
Keep it open.

106
00:06:52,258 --> 00:06:54,055
[Mac]
Charlie, this is a huge waste of time.

107
00:06:54,127 --> 00:06:57,426
No, no, no, no. This is standard procedure.
They do this on every crime show.

108
00:06:57,497 --> 00:06:59,931
You know, the murder police come
down to the scene of the crime.

109
00:06:59,999 --> 00:07:02,729
They find some blue-collar guy,
and they talk to him while he's working.

110
00:07:02,802 --> 00:07:05,794
Let's just talk to this guy
over here. He could know something, right?

111
00:07:05,872 --> 00:07:08,841
- Why would he know anything?
- He's moving crates from one place to...

112
00:07:08,908 --> 00:07:12,105
Will you just listen to me?
All right? Excuse me, sir. Do you work here?

113
00:07:12,178 --> 00:07:13,975
- Yeah.
- Please, don't stop your work.

114
00:07:14,047 --> 00:07:16,447
They never do on TV.
Go ahead and place that bag down.

115
00:07:16,516 --> 00:07:20,919
Uh, now, are you familiar with the beheading
that took place here last week?

116
00:07:20,987 --> 00:07:22,477
- Are you a cop?
- No.

117
00:07:22,555 --> 00:07:24,955
But I do work on the behalf
of the accused.

118
00:07:25,024 --> 00:07:28,790
I'm taking care of his interests and
whatnot. This is his son, uh, Ronald.

119
00:07:28,862 --> 00:07:31,194
- You're Luther's kid?
- Yeah. That's right, bozo.

120
00:07:31,264 --> 00:07:34,165
I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make
sure he doesn't get the death penalty.

121
00:07:34,234 --> 00:07:36,759
- Is that a threat?
- Why don't you tell us what you saw?

122
00:07:36,836 --> 00:07:39,134
- I didn't see either of those guys.
- There was more than one guy?

123
00:07:39,205 --> 00:07:40,934
I said too much. I don't want any trouble.

124
00:07:41,007 --> 00:07:43,441
Then stop giving us trouble,
and tell us if there was another guy.

125
00:07:43,510 --> 00:07:46,274
- My lips are sealed.
- Then unseal them, or I'll unseal them for you!

126
00:07:46,346 --> 00:07:49,281
Hey, hey! What the hell are you doing?
You can't threaten this guy.

127
00:07:49,349 --> 00:07:52,284
- I wasn't threatening him. - How do you
not know what a threat sounds like?

128
00:07:52,352 --> 00:07:54,616
- Oh, you mean the lips thing?
- Yes, the lips thing.

129
00:07:54,687 --> 00:07:56,746
He's got words in his lips.
I needed to get them out.

130
00:07:56,823 --> 00:07:59,189
I know the words are in his lips.
I saw them in there.

131
00:07:59,259 --> 00:08:01,022
- Just let me coax them out.
- Okay.

132
00:08:01,094 --> 00:08:03,085
Otherwise you're gonna freak the guy out.
Let me handle it.

133
00:08:03,163 --> 00:08:05,290
Sir, your lips are fine. I...

134
00:08:05,999 --> 00:08:07,364
Great.

135
00:08:07,433 --> 00:08:10,493
- That happens to us way too much.
- Yeah.

136
00:08:13,239 --> 00:08:16,640
I don't really care that much about Bill. I
just don't want him dying in the bar.

137
00:08:16,709 --> 00:08:19,177
- We've had too many deaths there.
- We should try not to have another one.

138
00:08:19,245 --> 00:08:22,043
- Let's cut it off.
- We gotta show Pondy life is worth living.

139
00:08:22,115 --> 00:08:26,051
Right. Not really excited about Maureen being
a part of this, but, yeah, we'll do it.

140
00:08:26,119 --> 00:08:27,609
Ah. Wh...

141
00:08:27,687 --> 00:08:29,848
- Hello, Dennis.
- Oh, God.

142
00:08:29,923 --> 00:08:32,483
Maureen, what's going on with
your face? What have you done?

143
00:08:32,559 --> 00:08:36,154
I've had a few surgical procedures
to enhance my natural beauty.

144
00:08:36,229 --> 00:08:38,060
You look like a cat.

145
00:08:38,131 --> 00:08:39,962
Yes, exactly. Cats are beautiful.

146
00:08:40,033 --> 00:08:42,126
- Where are your breasts?
- Oh, they're in my face.

147
00:08:42,202 --> 00:08:44,898
Great. I don't really
have time for this shit...

148
00:08:44,971 --> 00:08:46,962
so have you gathered Bill's family for us?

149
00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:48,564
[Mimicking Cat's Meow]
Me-yes.

150
00:08:54,647 --> 00:08:56,672
You kids remember Uncle Dennis?

151
00:08:56,749 --> 00:08:59,718
He came to talk to us
about something important. Go ahead, baby.

152
00:08:59,786 --> 00:09:01,913
- Yeah, uh...
- Are you two getting back together?

153
00:09:01,988 --> 00:09:03,649
- Oh, no.
- I think so.

154
00:09:03,723 --> 00:09:06,248
- Mmm, no, never.
- Uh, okay. Um, listen, you guys.

155
00:09:06,326 --> 00:09:08,760
Your dad... He needs your help right now.

156
00:09:08,828 --> 00:09:10,693
He's in a pretty tough spot.

157
00:09:10,763 --> 00:09:14,756
I don't call him "Dad." I call him Mr.
Cocksucker, 'cause he sucks so many cocks.

158
00:09:15,335 --> 00:09:16,825
Weird. Uh...

159
00:09:16,903 --> 00:09:18,894
I'm not going to call him that, okay?

160
00:09:18,972 --> 00:09:21,463
- I'll just refer to him as "Bill," I guess, from now...
- Yeah.

161
00:09:21,541 --> 00:09:23,509
Okay, so, listen. Here's the thing.

162
00:09:23,576 --> 00:09:27,103
- He is in our bar right now drinking
himself to death. - Oh, that's fantastic.

163
00:09:27,180 --> 00:09:30,581
What? No, that's not fantastic. The man's
trying to kill himself.

164
00:09:30,650 --> 00:09:34,916
- If he dies, we get money. - When I get
my money, I want to buy a new cell phone.

165
00:09:34,988 --> 00:09:37,957
- I'm gonna buy a gun, because I'm the
man of the house. - Oh, shit, no.

166
00:09:38,024 --> 00:09:40,788
- This kid should not have a... No, no. Please.
- [Dee] No.

167
00:09:40,860 --> 00:09:43,192
We're trying to show Bill
that life is worth living.

168
00:09:43,263 --> 00:09:45,060
- Your dad loves you.
- No, he doesn't.

169
00:09:45,131 --> 00:09:46,962
- Oh. Yeah.
- Has he not said it?

170
00:09:47,033 --> 00:09:48,694
- Because I'm telling you, he just...
- He does.

171
00:09:48,768 --> 00:09:51,794
No. He told me. He said,
"I do not love you. You're a punk."

172
00:09:51,871 --> 00:09:54,237
He called me too fat to be a slut...

173
00:09:54,307 --> 00:09:57,037
and tried to serve me
an omelet with cocaine in it.

174
00:09:57,110 --> 00:10:00,079
Listen, guys. This is about
forgiving Bill, your dad.

175
00:10:00,146 --> 00:10:01,636
- Okay? It's not about blaming him.
- No.

176
00:10:01,714 --> 00:10:04,706
I blame you too. You
and the other hookers he slept with.

177
00:10:04,784 --> 00:10:07,378
- Hold on. I'm not a hooker. I never have been.
- Well...

178
00:10:07,453 --> 00:10:09,216
- You're a hooker.
- You're a fat slut!

179
00:10:09,289 --> 00:10:11,587
- [Shrieks]
- Oh. Oh, okay, all right. Hey, hey, hey.

180
00:10:11,658 --> 00:10:15,321
And you... you ruined his sister with the
divorce, and look at her face.

181
00:10:15,395 --> 00:10:17,659
- She looks like a cat!
- Cats are magical.

182
00:10:17,730 --> 00:10:20,665
I kind of like it.
I mean, maybe you could get some fur.

183
00:10:20,733 --> 00:10:22,633
- Oh, I like that idea.
- What are you talk... No!

184
00:10:22,702 --> 00:10:25,500
- Think you could do a tail?
- Don't see why I couldn't do a tail.

185
00:10:25,571 --> 00:10:27,664
- D-Don't. No.
- You could go full cat...

186
00:10:27,740 --> 00:10:29,469
and start wearing humans on your sweatshirt.

187
00:10:29,542 --> 00:10:32,511
No one is turning themselves
into a goddamn cat with my money!

188
00:10:32,578 --> 00:10:34,170
Can we focus here? Let-Let's...

189
00:10:34,247 --> 00:10:38,308
Let's get back to showing Bill
that life is happy.

190
00:10:38,384 --> 00:10:41,979
Bill's a lying, cheating, drug-addict piece
of garbage, and we all hope he dies.

191
00:10:43,823 --> 00:10:45,586
Yeah.

192
00:10:52,231 --> 00:10:54,756
Hey, Dad. Hey, um, so I-I...

193
00:10:54,834 --> 00:10:57,496
I know you told us to stay out of it...

194
00:10:57,570 --> 00:11:00,198
but... but we found out
that there was another guy.

195
00:11:00,273 --> 00:11:02,400
Also, we got a stop sign
and re-created the murder...

196
00:11:02,475 --> 00:11:04,204
and there's no way
you could have swung that.

197
00:11:04,277 --> 00:11:05,938
I jacked my shoulder up a bit too.

198
00:11:06,012 --> 00:11:09,641
Do you realize what you've done?

199
00:11:09,716 --> 00:11:11,946
Yeah. No.
I told him, Mr. Mac. I said, "Hey!

200
00:11:12,018 --> 00:11:15,852
Stealing a stop sign, that's a felony." And
as your counsel, I did advise against it.

201
00:11:15,922 --> 00:11:19,619
I'm talking about you
going to the crime scene.

202
00:11:19,692 --> 00:11:24,391
Word's out my son is intimidating witnesses.

203
00:11:24,464 --> 00:11:27,331
Now that makes me look like I'm guilty.

204
00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:29,664
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah.

205
00:11:29,736 --> 00:11:31,727
- Your dad'd be a good lawyer.
- His idea.

206
00:11:31,804 --> 00:11:34,637
But the point is,
we found out that this other guy exists.

207
00:11:34,707 --> 00:11:37,642
All we need to do is get his name,
and I can rat on him.

208
00:11:37,710 --> 00:11:39,678
Do not be a rat!

209
00:11:39,746 --> 00:11:41,577
Stop...

210
00:11:41,647 --> 00:11:44,912
trying to handle it...

211
00:11:44,984 --> 00:11:49,512
or I am going to have to handle you.

212
00:11:49,589 --> 00:11:52,854
Okay?

213
00:11:52,925 --> 00:11:54,916
Okay, Daddy.

214
00:11:55,862 --> 00:11:56,851
Oh.

215
00:11:57,897 --> 00:12:00,058
- I love you, Dad.
- Let it go. Let it go.

216
00:12:00,133 --> 00:12:01,623
- It's just I thought maybe...
- Yeah.

217
00:12:01,701 --> 00:12:03,191
- It's not broken.
- No.

218
00:12:03,269 --> 00:12:05,396
- Yeah, it's working fine, isn't it?
- No, it works.

219
00:12:05,471 --> 00:12:07,666
- He seemed a little upset.
- All right, plan "B" here.

220
00:12:07,740 --> 00:12:10,174
- Tsk, tsk, tsk.
- I got an idea.

221
00:12:10,243 --> 00:12:14,942
Why don't we check the guest record, right,
because maybe that guy came to visit my dad?

222
00:12:15,014 --> 00:12:16,743
- Oh, the other guy signed in?
- Yes.

223
00:12:16,816 --> 00:12:18,306
Uh, that's a good point.

224
00:12:18,384 --> 00:12:20,750
Luther McDonald visited by...

225
00:12:20,820 --> 00:12:22,720
Bonnie Kelly... holy shit!

226
00:12:22,789 --> 00:12:25,781
- Well, that's the same name as my mom.
- It <i>is</i> your mom.

227
00:12:25,858 --> 00:12:28,224
Nah. I'm sure there's
plenty of Bonnie Kellys.

228
00:12:28,294 --> 00:12:31,229
They probably all sign their name with those
weird, squiggly lines and...

229
00:12:31,297 --> 00:12:33,857
Cursive? Are-Are
you talking about cursive, dude?

230
00:12:33,933 --> 00:12:36,731
Uh, "cursing"?

231
00:12:36,803 --> 00:12:39,067
Cursive. Everybody can under...
Okay, look, doesn't matter.

232
00:12:39,138 --> 00:12:42,107
We have to figure out why
she came to visit my dad.

233
00:12:42,175 --> 00:12:44,507
And why is she signing my mom's name?

234
00:12:44,577 --> 00:12:46,772
Goddamn it. Goddamn it.

235
00:12:49,715 --> 00:12:52,411
- [Dennis] Hey!
- Bill, we want to talk to you.

236
00:12:52,485 --> 00:12:56,387
Hey, you guys see this? There was another
ferry that ran into the power plant.

237
00:12:56,456 --> 00:12:58,822
Copycat crime.
[Wheezing Laugh]

238
00:12:58,891 --> 00:13:00,483
- Hilarious, right?
- No!

239
00:13:00,560 --> 00:13:03,893
No. There are black and white areas in life,
Bill, and that's a black area.

240
00:13:03,963 --> 00:13:05,794
Look, turn it off.

241
00:13:05,865 --> 00:13:09,266
We want to focus on the positive
in life now, Pondy.

242
00:13:09,335 --> 00:13:13,135
- Which is why we're all wearing these
ill-fitting T-shirts. - [Dee] Yeah.

243
00:13:13,206 --> 00:13:16,664
- We wanna show you some reasons
why life is worth living. - Yeah.

244
00:13:16,742 --> 00:13:18,141
And, Dennis, you're up.

245
00:13:18,211 --> 00:13:21,044
- Okay, so I like a good mani-pedi.
- Oh.

246
00:13:21,114 --> 00:13:23,378
Yeah, I like a good,
healthy nail. I love one.

247
00:13:23,449 --> 00:13:25,178
You know, you get your nail beds clean.

248
00:13:25,251 --> 00:13:26,878
- Get your cuticles pushed back.
- Oh, yeah.

249
00:13:26,953 --> 00:13:28,614
- Get your hangnails all trimmed up...
- That's great.

250
00:13:28,688 --> 00:13:32,021
- By one of those nice ladies over there.
- A lot of those are sex workers.

251
00:13:32,091 --> 00:13:33,353
[Stammers]

252
00:13:33,426 --> 00:13:36,759
Yeah, the gals at the nail salon...
They're prostitutes.

253
00:13:36,829 --> 00:13:39,320
They're trafficked in,
usually in shipping containers.

254
00:13:39,398 --> 00:13:42,128
They're, like,
crammed in there, you know, like sardines...

255
00:13:42,201 --> 00:13:43,964
shipped with sardines sometimes.

256
00:13:44,036 --> 00:13:46,664
- Oh.
- It's ugly. But the point is...

257
00:13:46,739 --> 00:13:50,675
those ladies doing your nails
probably tugged a guy off right before you.

258
00:13:50,743 --> 00:13:52,608
- They ship 'em in in shipping containers?
- Yeah.

259
00:13:52,678 --> 00:13:54,509
That's depressing as hell.

260
00:13:54,580 --> 00:13:56,377
- Goddamn!
- All right.

261
00:13:56,449 --> 00:13:58,610
- Dee. You. You're up, yeah.
- Me? Yeah!

262
00:13:58,684 --> 00:14:00,743
Hey, Bill, you know, for me, uh...

263
00:14:00,820 --> 00:14:04,153
really it's just the simple things
that I like in my life...

264
00:14:04,223 --> 00:14:08,353
like a moonlight walk or a cozy, warm nap.

265
00:14:08,427 --> 00:14:11,294
Or a delicious, ripe
piece of fruit, you know?

266
00:14:11,364 --> 00:14:13,355
- Oh.
- Mmm.

267
00:14:13,432 --> 00:14:15,866
You know, sex workers
use fruit during the act.

268
00:14:15,935 --> 00:14:17,197
- What?
- Yeah.

269
00:14:17,270 --> 00:14:20,569
Yeah, well, citrus masks
the taste of a dirty penis.

270
00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:22,335
[Inhales Sharply]
In fact...

271
00:14:22,408 --> 00:14:25,809
95% of fruit has usually been in someone's
orifice before it reaches the market.

272
00:14:25,878 --> 00:14:28,312
Okay. Okay. I'm done.

273
00:14:28,381 --> 00:14:30,679
- He's ruined fruit for me, so I'm done.
- You made fruit depressing.

274
00:14:30,750 --> 00:14:32,479
All right, well, I got this.

275
00:14:32,552 --> 00:14:35,385
Okay. All right, what makes me
happy is, like, you know...

276
00:14:35,454 --> 00:14:40,016
at night, a ride around town in a limousine,
partying, having a good time.

277
00:14:40,092 --> 00:14:42,356
When I'm on my way home, I'll pass a bum.

278
00:14:42,428 --> 00:14:46,159
I take a balloon with some champagne in it,
lob it out and bean him.

279
00:14:46,232 --> 00:14:48,666
He only gets a little
in his mouth. Doesn't get the whole thing.

280
00:14:48,734 --> 00:14:51,202
- Right.
- Not even a full sip of it. And you say...

281
00:14:51,270 --> 00:14:54,535
"Hey, how do you like
a taste of the good life, you sack of shit?"

282
00:14:54,607 --> 00:14:56,541
[Wheezing Laugh]

283
00:14:58,244 --> 00:15:00,508
- [Laughing]
- God. That is awful!

284
00:15:00,580 --> 00:15:03,344
- That is a horrible thing to do to
another human being! - Goddamn you!

285
00:15:03,416 --> 00:15:05,145
Get over here, Frank. Get over here.

286
00:15:05,218 --> 00:15:06,947
- Okay, that's it. I'm done.
- Well...

287
00:15:07,019 --> 00:15:09,283
This is depressing as shit.
I'm not doing this anymore.

288
00:15:09,355 --> 00:15:11,721
In fact, I'm starting to think
that his family was right.

289
00:15:11,791 --> 00:15:15,488
You guys, what if we took out
a life insurance policy on the guy?

290
00:15:15,561 --> 00:15:18,394
If he's gonna do it anyway,
we might as well make money off of it.

291
00:15:18,464 --> 00:15:20,056
- Hmm, that's dark.
- Yeah, I know.

292
00:15:20,132 --> 00:15:22,566
But can you take
a life insurance policy out on anybody?

293
00:15:22,635 --> 00:15:25,126
- Does it work that way?
- Mmm, it's a gray area.

294
00:15:25,204 --> 00:15:28,696
But I think I got a guy,
I could twist his arm, we can get one.

295
00:15:28,774 --> 00:15:33,643
I say we embrace the gray area of life, okay,
because what we're doing is not working.

296
00:15:33,713 --> 00:15:36,739
What, the state can murder
somebody without them even wanting to die...

297
00:15:36,816 --> 00:15:39,114
but a grown man can't
kill himself if he wants to?

298
00:15:39,185 --> 00:15:41,983
- A man should be able to end his life...
- He's a grown American man.

299
00:15:42,054 --> 00:15:45,251
- We're American.
- Ah, to hell with him. We tried. I give up.

300
00:15:45,324 --> 00:15:47,224
Great, great. Glad you're on our side.

301
00:15:47,293 --> 00:15:49,124
- You're a terrible sponsor, by the way.
- Yeah.

302
00:15:54,667 --> 00:15:57,932
Okay, so why were you visiting Luther, Mom?

303
00:15:58,004 --> 00:16:00,802
- I went to go...
- She don't know nothin' about nothin'.

304
00:16:00,873 --> 00:16:03,501
Look, we know there was
another guy in on this, all right?

305
00:16:03,576 --> 00:16:05,476
So, come on. Anything you can give us.

306
00:16:05,544 --> 00:16:07,842
He was staying here for a few months.

307
00:16:07,913 --> 00:16:10,746
He was here for a few months?
Mom, why wouldn't you tell me that?

308
00:16:10,816 --> 00:16:11,942
[Snorts]

309
00:16:12,018 --> 00:16:15,112
Well, was he here
on the night of the murder?

310
00:16:15,187 --> 00:16:17,417
Uh, no.

311
00:16:17,490 --> 00:16:19,287
Mom, don't lie, okay?

312
00:16:19,358 --> 00:16:21,087
- Okay, yes.
- Quiet, Bonnie.

313
00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:23,754
- No, no.
- Mom, if you know something, you gotta tell me.

314
00:16:23,829 --> 00:16:26,127
I can't lie to my Charlie.

315
00:16:26,198 --> 00:16:28,257
- Good! Tell me everything.
- Okay.

316
00:16:28,334 --> 00:16:30,131
They were both here.

317
00:16:30,202 --> 00:16:31,965
They were both inside me.

318
00:16:32,038 --> 00:16:35,337
Eduardo was in my mouth,
and Luther was in my butt.

319
00:16:35,408 --> 00:16:37,535
Oh, my God, no.
Don't tell me everything. What? No! What?

320
00:16:37,610 --> 00:16:39,202
Damn it, Bonnie.

321
00:16:39,278 --> 00:16:40,677
- Eduardo who?
- Sanchez.

322
00:16:40,746 --> 00:16:42,441
Holy shit. Tell us more.

323
00:16:42,515 --> 00:16:46,713
Then Luther went in
Eduardo's butt for a while.

324
00:16:46,786 --> 00:16:48,549
Tell us less. Tell us less.

325
00:16:48,621 --> 00:16:53,388
Then they both "completed" on each other.
I was left out of the finale.

326
00:16:53,459 --> 00:16:55,689
And then Eduardo went out...

327
00:16:55,761 --> 00:16:58,321
and then he killed somebody, and then...

328
00:16:58,397 --> 00:16:59,887
Well, that's all I know.

329
00:17:01,634 --> 00:17:04,364
Jesus goddamn Christ, Mom.
If you know that, just say that.

330
00:17:04,437 --> 00:17:07,463
Don't tell me the whole thing about banging
every guy that comes in the house.

331
00:17:07,540 --> 00:17:09,770
If you know about the murder,
just say the murder part!

332
00:17:09,842 --> 00:17:13,175
- Oh, my God! - Oh, my God. This is
crazy. You guys know what this means?

333
00:17:13,245 --> 00:17:16,942
That my father was trying to establish dominance.
That's the reason he was in his butt...

334
00:17:17,016 --> 00:17:18,984
- What... Why are you focused on that?
- It's about power.

335
00:17:19,051 --> 00:17:21,383
- We have our guy now.
- I feel we should make that known...

336
00:17:21,454 --> 00:17:23,513
- that it's about power.
- Let's not make any of it known.

337
00:17:23,589 --> 00:17:25,887
- We gotta go to the police.
- Don't be a rat.

338
00:17:25,958 --> 00:17:28,688
All right, look, Mrs. Mac.
We're not gonna rat, all right?

339
00:17:28,761 --> 00:17:30,251
We're gonna figure something else out. Good?

340
00:17:31,063 --> 00:17:32,553
[Groans]

341
00:17:32,631 --> 00:17:34,690
Okay, you're off words again.
Great.

342
00:17:34,767 --> 00:17:37,998
And, Mom, don't bang every guy
that comes into the house. How 'bout that?

343
00:17:38,070 --> 00:17:39,662
Okay, I won't, sweetie.

344
00:17:39,739 --> 00:17:41,502
Okay.

345
00:17:45,378 --> 00:17:46,868
It is my gift to you.

346
00:17:46,946 --> 00:17:48,607
This is...
This is great. Thank you.

347
00:17:48,681 --> 00:17:52,048
Guys, guys, guys.
We've had a major break in my dad's case.

348
00:17:52,118 --> 00:17:55,019
- What's Ponderosa doing here?
- Oh, he's gonna drink himself to death.

349
00:17:55,087 --> 00:17:58,545
- So we took out a life insurance policy
on him. - [Charlie] Oh, cool, yeah.

350
00:17:58,624 --> 00:18:00,558
- Pretty dark though, right?
- We've been over this.

351
00:18:00,626 --> 00:18:02,753
- Don't worry. We're okay.
- We've justified this. Move past it.

352
00:18:02,828 --> 00:18:07,094
Fair enough. Turns out Mac's dad didn't kill
the guy. No, there was another man in on this.

353
00:18:07,166 --> 00:18:11,762
It's gonna look bad if I rat on this man,
Eduardo Sanchez, so I can't say his name.

354
00:18:11,837 --> 00:18:13,737
- [Dee] Uh...
- You just did. You just ratted him out.

355
00:18:13,806 --> 00:18:15,330
You said his name.

356
00:18:15,408 --> 00:18:18,206
By the way, another guy being there doesn't
mean your dad didn't do it.

357
00:18:18,277 --> 00:18:20,768
- He might've done it with the other guy.
- Oh, no, uh...

358
00:18:20,846 --> 00:18:24,111
- my dad established dominance over this
man. - Well, let's not get into that.

359
00:18:24,183 --> 00:18:25,207
- What does that mean?
- What's this?

360
00:18:25,284 --> 00:18:26,876
There was some weird prison sex going on.

361
00:18:26,952 --> 00:18:28,749
[Mac]
He may have been a power bottom.

362
00:18:28,821 --> 00:18:30,721
Bottom line, he talked
his lover into doing the murder.

363
00:18:30,790 --> 00:18:32,553
- Not his lover, his prison bitch.
- [Dee] Oh.

364
00:18:32,625 --> 00:18:34,286
Hey, what if I confess? Hmm?

365
00:18:34,360 --> 00:18:35,554
What?

366
00:18:35,628 --> 00:18:38,256
Yeah, I could take my own life
while saving your dad's.

367
00:18:38,330 --> 00:18:39,820
Everybody wins!

368
00:18:39,899 --> 00:18:41,662
Well, yeah, except everyone would think...

369
00:18:41,734 --> 00:18:44,134
that you decapitated a man with a stop sign.

370
00:18:44,203 --> 00:18:47,604
Ooh, even better!
Oh, that'll really embarrass the wife.

371
00:18:47,673 --> 00:18:50,301
I like where this is going,
but I gotta bring something up here.

372
00:18:50,376 --> 00:18:54,676
Um, if you were to do that...
And I don't want to be crass or, you know...

373
00:18:54,747 --> 00:18:56,237
- but how would that affect the...
- Yeah.

374
00:18:56,315 --> 00:18:57,805
- We still get the money.
- Yeah?

375
00:18:57,883 --> 00:19:00,408
- I bought the most expensive policy I could.
- Great.

376
00:19:00,486 --> 00:19:02,613
- Let's go confess, baby!
- Yeah.

377
00:19:05,257 --> 00:19:09,785
I can't... I'm sorry. I just... I don't get how
it's dominant if they finished on each other.

378
00:19:09,862 --> 00:19:11,352
- How's that dominant?
- It's not.

379
00:19:11,430 --> 00:19:13,421
It's dominant because he finished first.

380
00:19:13,499 --> 00:19:16,366
Then he allowed Eduardo to finish.

381
00:19:16,435 --> 00:19:19,029
- [Charlie] You're making that up.
- [Dee] Oh, there's Bill.

382
00:19:19,104 --> 00:19:20,799
- Here we go.
- Hey.

383
00:19:20,873 --> 00:19:23,205
Well, I did it. I confessed.

384
00:19:23,275 --> 00:19:25,140
Why aren't you in handcuffs then?

385
00:19:25,211 --> 00:19:28,146
Weirdest thing...
I'm sitting in the interrogation room...

386
00:19:28,214 --> 00:19:31,741
you know, sobering up a little, looking at
myself in the two-way mirror...

387
00:19:31,817 --> 00:19:33,409
and I kept reading this shirt.

388
00:19:33,486 --> 00:19:36,148
Yeah. Yeah, I started thinking,
"You know what?

389
00:19:36,222 --> 00:19:39,214
Life <i>is</i> happy. I want to live!"
[Laughs]

390
00:19:39,291 --> 00:19:40,781
Then what did you confess about?

391
00:19:40,860 --> 00:19:43,021
Eduardo Sanchez.
That guy you were talking about?

392
00:19:43,095 --> 00:19:46,087
Turns out he's some big
gang member they've been after for years.

393
00:19:46,165 --> 00:19:48,599
Yeah, your dad's innocent.

394
00:19:48,667 --> 00:19:51,397
Holy shit, my dad's gonna get off.

395
00:19:51,470 --> 00:19:53,870
That means I'm a hero! I did it!

396
00:19:55,474 --> 00:19:58,534
- Dad... Dad, we did it.
- We did it.

397
00:19:58,611 --> 00:20:02,843
Yeah, we did it! They're gonna nail this Eduardo
Sanchez guy, and you're gonna walk free.

398
00:20:02,915 --> 00:20:04,815
- I saved you.
- Saved me?

399
00:20:04,884 --> 00:20:07,318
- Yeah.
- You buried me.

400
00:20:08,587 --> 00:20:11,351
Now everyone in here thinks I'm a rat.

401
00:20:11,423 --> 00:20:14,984
They're gonna kill me
in here. Because of you.

402
00:20:16,795 --> 00:20:18,592
I'm-I'm sorry.

403
00:20:18,664 --> 00:20:20,598
I still love you.

404
00:20:20,666 --> 00:20:22,156
I don't.

405
00:20:24,169 --> 00:20:27,161
- [Door Buzzes]
- Well, he definitely heard you.

406
00:20:27,239 --> 00:20:29,434
- [Men Shouting] Snitch!
- You know, he can... he can hear you.

407
00:20:29,508 --> 00:20:31,738
He didn't mean that though.
He was just upset.

408
00:20:34,500 --> 00:20:42,500
<b><font color="#0E7521">Ripped By mstoll
Happy New Year 2016 - New Year, New Color ;-)</font></b>

409
00:21:07,846 --> 00:21:10,781
<i>[Voice Speaking Backwards]</i>

