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Welcome back
to Greendale, now ranking fifth...
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...on Colorado's alphabetical listing
of community colleges.
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Rest in peace,
Fatboy Slim's DJ School.
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This school owes its continued
existence to the following heroes:
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Jeff Winger, a teacher
so dedicated to clean energy...
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...he's already parking
like his car is electric.
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Britta Perry, currently raising
awareness of homelessness...
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...not that she has a choice.
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Abed Nadir, who actually wrote
this announcement...
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...for the sake of, as he put it,
catching everyone up.
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And Annie Edison who led the effort
to save Greendale...
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...from 534 critical emergencies.
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Five hundred thirty-four?
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Frisbee!
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Hey, Leonard, what,
are you gonna bogart the disc all day?
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Like tears in rain.
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What?
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Ripped By mstoll
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I can't believe the roof collapsed.
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- We almost killed Fat Neil.
- That was Garrett.
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See, we're monsters.
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If they blame us, let me take the heat.
I'd never see the inside of a cell.
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I have been reliving this day
over and over for a thousand years.
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Guys, this is not on us.
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That roof was gonna collapse;
80 percent of the rubble was Styrofoam.
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Speaking of guilt, where's Shirley?
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- You didn't tell him?
- I was waiting until we were all together.
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Abed's not comfortable
with C-H-A-N-G-E.
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Hey, screw you. I can spell.
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Screw you.
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- Is Shirley gone? Did she spin off?
- Nobody spins off in real life, Abed.
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Shirley went to look after her dad
in Atlanta and ended up taking a job...
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...as a personal chef
to a brilliant but troubled detective.
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I told her I'd manage her shop
while she's gone.
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That's very generous of you.
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I have a friend in town,
every time you need help.
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She'll be back.
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Like Troy? Are any of you white people
noticing what's happening to this group?
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Do Abed and I need to be concerned?
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You have my word, as leader
of the white people, no cause for alarm.
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Say hello to new Shirley. Heh, heh.
Just kidding. This is Francesca Dart.
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I have brought her on
as an administrative consultant.
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I thought it would be fun
and mandatory...
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...for you to add her
to your little committee.
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- Why, because one roof collapsed?
- No. God, God no.
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I'm your friend
bringing you a new friend...
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...one with training
in not collapsing roofs.
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Is she...? Excuse me, ma'am.
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Is she above us or below us?
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She is... Whoop. Heh, heh, heh.
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I'm getting a call here and, um,
I'll have to take it.
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Why don't you explain
what your role will be...
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...while I leave to take this call.
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- My phone is vibrating, but it is...
- In your office...
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...which you didn't realize when you
started the fake phone call move.
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- My phone is in my pocket, Jeffrey.
- Hm.
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I'm walking away,
so I can get it out and answer it.
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Let me know how it goes.
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- Okay, I'll just have a seat...
- No!
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- Hey!
- No!
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Our friend used to sit there.
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She spun off.
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I'm sorry. What about here?
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- Yeah.
- I guess that's okay.
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Okay, so I took an informal survey
to get a sense...
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...of how Greendale is perceived.
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Weird, passionate and gross.
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Now, you wanna hang on
to that grouping.
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In marketing,
it's what we call the Good Belushi.
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If I had a magic wand, I'd use it to make
sure Greendale never had to grow up.
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I would also probably use it
to cut the magic-wand class...
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...that I noticed is actually offered here,
as well as VCR repair...
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...a class called Ladders,
and "When Is It Okay to Shake a Baby?"
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In terms of hierarchy,
I'm a big believer in it.
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Someone needs to say, "I'm in charge,"
and that person is me.
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That's my decision. That doesn't mean
that we don't work together...
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...but all communication and decisions
will go through me.
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I'll send out an e-mail later
to set up our next meeting.
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- Awesome.
- Great seeing you.
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Yeah. Coolios.
Who in the crazy bitch...?
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- Did that just happen?
- Did you see her binder? Ha. Ha!
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- Nondescript.
- Seems like she may be trouble.
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To be fair,
she's an additional "white" person...
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- ...which has become important here.
- No, thank you.
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I'm... I'm just glad I was able to answer.
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My... My phone got lodged
in my pocket.
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I know. I... I guess that is a thing.
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So you were saying about the thing,
the reason you were calling was...
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What were you talking to me about?
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Looks good, Tony.
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I'm sorry,
I just assume your name is Tony.
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Here you go.
I gave you some extra heat.
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Britta, what is the weekly cost
of this restaurant?
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That's easy. My dignity.
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Seems like this sandwich counter
is consuming your happiness...
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...and converting it
into burnt bread and debt.
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- So?
- Frankie, hi. Um...
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Someone removed all the liquor
from the faculty lounge.
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I'm sorry, I can't legally protect or insure
a campus with free-flowing booze.
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Well, I can't teach
with free-flowing sobriety.
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- Heh.
- Is that true?
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- Do you really think you're an addict?
- No.
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Dean.
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Hello? Oh, hey. Yes, I can talk.
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- Damn it.
- I am available anytime for you.
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Frankie, Frankie. Hi.
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I had an idea
about how to de-electrify the pool.
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- Oh, that's already been dealt with.
- Okay, well, then there's...
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Oh, let's see. Done, done, deloused...
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...appraised, defused, rebuilt...
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...de-peanut buttered,
debunked, spayed, neutered...
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...underway, re-sanctified, plunged,
deported and exhumed.
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Thank you. Oh, this is pretty.
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I'm gonna name one of my sandwiches
after her.
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- My sandwiches suck.
- She is improving Greendale.
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Yeah, but how much
can you improve Greendale...
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...before it stops being Greendale?
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She didn't suffer for this place.
She doesn't understand it.
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She's gonna end up messing
with something that...
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Abed.
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Temporal mutation.
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In English, doc.
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Simply put, Mr. President...
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...in 12 hours,
these dinosaurs will become...
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Mind if I sit here?
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- Time-osaurs.
Go ahead, I can re-shoot.
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- How's everything going?
- I have concerns.
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- I'd like to hear them.
- You're not distinct from Annie...
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...in physicality and purpose.
- Okay.
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I can't determine if you have any point of
view that makes you a creative addition.
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I don't know what that means,
but I'm writing it down.
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My umbrella concern is that you
represent the end of "our show"...
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...which was once a family
of misfit students...
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...and is now a loose-knit students
and teachers...
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...none of whom are take class together
in school, which is becoming grounded...
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...asking questions like,
"How do any of us get our money?
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When will we get our degrees?
What happened to that girl I was dating?"
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As opposed to questions like,
"What is real? What is sanity?
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Is there a god?
Where's that Pierce hologram?"
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Jeff saw a Pierce hologram.
None of us have seen it.
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If there's a Pierce ghost,
I'd like to get a head start on busting it.
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All right. This is the first I've heard
that I'm a character on a show.
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I'm excited to be one,
but I'll be a boring one.
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Quirks are not my strong suit,
results are.
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I love quirky people.
I come from a big family of people...
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...who are literally insane.
I moved out here to take care of one.
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But I myself am exceptionally boring,
and I am quite proud to be that way...
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...because it allows me
to help the less boring people...
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...turn quirks into results.
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That's the most interesting take
on not being interesting I've ever heard.
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As far as what I represent, I wouldn't
give me or anyone else that power.
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Good shows change, I assume.
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Personally, I don't own a TV.
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You're the first person to say that
that I didn't delete from my brain.
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Thank you.
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Emergency meeting
at Shirley's Sandwiches right now.
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Everyone freaking out.
New lady is evil.
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- Crazy frown.
- I should go.
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00:10:02,835 --> 00:10:06,100
Abed, I could use someone's help
in learning the ropes around here.
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I'll ask around.
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- Brit, dumb hat.
- Talking down to you.
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- She hates you.
- I got it from Shirley.
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What are you doing?
Are you The Big Chill- ing?
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Only there's not a hippie that died
to make us come together and complain.
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- It's our school.
- Frankie's taking over.
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Cancelled Ladders,
she's banning substances.
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She wants to shut down Shirley's
Sandwiches. She called Annie a bitch.
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- She implied I was a bitch.
- Implied Annie was a bitch...
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...who thinks she's better.
- You're just...
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She was nice to me.
In fact, we got along.
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Abed, are you sure she wasn't actually
being sweetly condescending?
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I learned to pick up on that.
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I make a movement that we form
a separate, secret committee.
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I second Britta's motion,
not movement.
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I third Annie's number two-ing...
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...of the movement Brita made.
- Gross.
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To preserve the real Greendale,
oppose Frankie or drink.
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Whatever's easiest.
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00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:03,993
Are you guys sure she's bad?
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00:11:04,196 --> 00:11:06,858
Sure you're not doing what I do,
overreacting to change?
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00:11:07,066 --> 00:11:09,557
Nobody's ever doing what you do, Abed.
You're nuts.
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00:11:09,769 --> 00:11:12,897
In a good way.
I'm just saying. Leave reality to us.
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00:11:13,139 --> 00:11:15,334
- We support you.
- Don't make it more dramatic.
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00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:18,170
It's a blood oath to defy evil.
You're either in or out.
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00:11:19,578 --> 00:11:23,412
- Can I hang around if I don't do the oath?
- Oh, gee. You mean just be friends?
186
00:11:23,649 --> 00:11:25,514
Sure. Great, Abed.
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00:11:26,052 --> 00:11:27,576
Okay.
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00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:31,083
Can I have some pretzels?
189
00:11:35,094 --> 00:11:38,063
No.
Those are secret-committee pretzels.
190
00:11:40,733 --> 00:11:42,223
Okay.
191
00:11:42,735 --> 00:11:44,202
Well...
192
00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:53,005
Yes, that was a test.
You guys are bad friends.
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00:11:58,951 --> 00:12:00,578
Don't think of it as bad baking.
194
00:12:00,820 --> 00:12:04,347
Think of it as a crushing blow
to a gender stereotype.
195
00:12:04,523 --> 00:12:06,218
Ugh.
196
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:12,190
Might help if every burnt sandwich didn't
come with a self-aware sandwich bit.
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00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:15,367
Is that how you're gonna help
increase sales, creative notes?
198
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:17,559
I had that sign spinner idea.
199
00:12:20,206 --> 00:12:23,972
We're a restaurant inside a cafeteria,
Annie, our weak point wasn't traffic.
200
00:12:24,143 --> 00:12:27,112
Flo, Alice, stop fighting,
can't afford to lose this place.
201
00:12:27,279 --> 00:12:29,304
If I start drinking in the men's room...
202
00:12:29,482 --> 00:12:32,474
...the score in my head has to change
from Trent Reznor to Johnny Cash...
203
00:12:32,651 --> 00:12:34,619
...doing Trent Reznor.
- I'm a bartender.
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00:12:34,787 --> 00:12:37,551
I know a little bit more
about the human side of service.
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00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:39,850
I can't eat this.
Can I get my money back?
206
00:12:40,059 --> 00:12:41,253
You're human garbage.
207
00:12:42,461 --> 00:12:45,760
- Hi, Mr. Winger. Nice lecture yesterday.
- Don't patronize me, Dave.
208
00:12:45,931 --> 00:12:49,367
It might not seem like this, but you're
killing a black-owned business.
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00:12:51,003 --> 00:12:53,233
I'll call it even
for a drink with Mr. Winger.
210
00:12:55,274 --> 00:12:57,606
- That's absurd.
- You will?
211
00:12:59,979 --> 00:13:02,971
Let's see some ID. You snitch, you die.
212
00:13:04,283 --> 00:13:05,477
- Morning.
- Morning.
213
00:13:05,684 --> 00:13:07,151
Morning.
214
00:13:07,386 --> 00:13:10,412
Well, I guess we'll wait for the others
before we start.
215
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:12,523
- I don't think they're coming.
- What?
216
00:13:12,758 --> 00:13:15,989
The committee had a meeting last night
and decided you are evil.
217
00:13:16,162 --> 00:13:18,494
Ooh. Wait, you guys had a meeting
last night?
218
00:13:18,697 --> 00:13:21,996
So we broke up as friends.
Because I don't think you're evil.
219
00:13:22,201 --> 00:13:25,295
I think you scare people
because you live in the real world.
220
00:13:25,504 --> 00:13:28,803
I'm sorry that happened, Abed.
It's like I said yesterday at lunch.
221
00:13:29,008 --> 00:13:31,135
Drama and conflict
are exciting and easy.
222
00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:33,301
Making a difference can be pretty boring.
223
00:13:33,479 --> 00:13:34,537
You guys had lunch?
224
00:13:34,713 --> 00:13:37,341
I'd live in that world.
I'm tired from all the drama...
225
00:13:37,516 --> 00:13:39,984
- ...the heroes, the villains, monsters...
- Pokémons.
226
00:13:40,152 --> 00:13:41,779
You see things the way they are.
227
00:13:41,954 --> 00:13:42,978
Leprechauns... Scary.
228
00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:45,020
I don't know if I could be like that,
but I don't think...
229
00:13:45,191 --> 00:13:48,388
...it makes sense to be against it.
- Ever hear of the Slender Man?
230
00:13:48,561 --> 00:13:50,893
I'd like to help
and if possible, learn from you.
231
00:13:51,063 --> 00:13:52,496
You guys on Reddit? 4chan?
232
00:13:52,698 --> 00:13:54,359
- That would be great.
- It's awesome.
233
00:13:54,567 --> 00:13:57,365
I think we'd all benefit
if we were more like you.
234
00:13:57,570 --> 00:14:01,836
- So, what do you say?
- Let's order some food.
235
00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:04,305
- Let's save Greendale.
- Let's save Greendale.
236
00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:09,641
Tacos! We are something else.
237
00:14:23,362 --> 00:14:24,590
Abed.
238
00:14:24,830 --> 00:14:26,195
- Abed.
- Yeah?
239
00:14:26,398 --> 00:14:28,332
- What are you doing?
- What do you mean?
240
00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:30,502
You were sweeping,
straightening clocks...
241
00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:33,103
Why are you cleaning that sign?
I gave you a list.
242
00:14:33,272 --> 00:14:34,671
List felt similar visually.
243
00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:37,707
I can't picture a montage cutting
from me "verifying Diane's invoice"...
244
00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:39,902
...to me "e-mailing confirmation
to Diane."
245
00:14:40,079 --> 00:14:43,708
- Right. But a montage is what, Abed?
- It's a movie apologizing for reality.
246
00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:45,783
- And we are where?
- Reality.
247
00:14:46,018 --> 00:14:47,383
And what do people do here?
248
00:14:49,021 --> 00:14:51,046
They e-mail Diane.
249
00:15:04,803 --> 00:15:08,034
Abed, if you change your clothes
one more time today, you're fired.
250
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:09,798
Sorry.
251
00:15:13,545 --> 00:15:15,410
- Hey, Abed.
- Hey, Todd.
252
00:15:15,614 --> 00:15:17,548
Are Annie and Britta around?
253
00:15:17,716 --> 00:15:19,946
No.
254
00:15:30,963 --> 00:15:34,558
Abed. Maybe you should order
the special.
255
00:15:35,167 --> 00:15:36,429
I'll have the special.
256
00:15:36,635 --> 00:15:38,398
The specials are kept in the back.
257
00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:46,340
You sh... You should go in the back.
258
00:16:15,607 --> 00:16:17,507
I'd like the special.
259
00:16:31,590 --> 00:16:34,616
Vaporizers? Skittles?
260
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:36,089
- Abed.
- Hey, Annie.
261
00:16:36,295 --> 00:16:37,819
This place is so conceptual.
262
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:40,830
It's practical too. We made
enough money to save Shirley's.
263
00:16:41,033 --> 00:16:43,695
Ironic because if Shirley saw this,
her soul would die.
264
00:16:43,902 --> 00:16:46,336
Hey, Abed, check this out.
265
00:16:48,407 --> 00:16:51,638
- Oh, Britta's still the worst?
- A bar gets dirty.
266
00:16:51,844 --> 00:16:54,404
You'll need someone to clean it.
Probably after hours.
267
00:16:54,646 --> 00:16:57,513
And those floor polishers
can get pretty loud.
268
00:16:57,716 --> 00:16:59,877
I'd hate for someone to hear it.
269
00:17:00,119 --> 00:17:01,916
You blackmailing me?
270
00:17:02,154 --> 00:17:03,746
Just talking shop.
271
00:17:06,425 --> 00:17:07,585
What's the rumpus, Abed?
272
00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:09,250
- Miller's Crossing.
Mm-hm.
273
00:17:09,428 --> 00:17:11,555
This is great.
You guys should be proud of yourselves.
274
00:17:11,730 --> 00:17:13,197
We missed you. Have a drink.
275
00:17:13,399 --> 00:17:17,130
- Put on an old-timey jacket.
- That's okay. I don't do this anymore.
276
00:17:17,336 --> 00:17:19,031
All right. Come on.
277
00:17:19,238 --> 00:17:21,365
I said, I don't do this, see?
278
00:17:21,573 --> 00:17:24,701
- You dirty rat.
- You guys are all dirty rats.
279
00:17:24,910 --> 00:17:28,368
- What's your romper room?
- All right. Maybe just one drink.
280
00:17:28,580 --> 00:17:31,413
And then, maybe,
cut to a montage of drinks.
281
00:17:31,583 --> 00:17:32,743
Whoo!
282
00:17:36,188 --> 00:17:38,019
- Go, go, go!
- Shots, shots, shots!
283
00:17:40,692 --> 00:17:42,023
Drinking!
284
00:17:42,194 --> 00:17:44,560
Let's never stop
being friends again. Ever.
285
00:17:44,763 --> 00:17:46,196
Mm-hm. Cheers.
286
00:17:46,365 --> 00:17:49,061
We shouldn't have made you
choose between Frankie and us.
287
00:17:49,268 --> 00:17:51,133
Oh, she's good for business.
288
00:17:51,303 --> 00:17:54,295
- Sorry we made you choose...
- You're just repeating what I said.
289
00:17:54,473 --> 00:17:55,963
You're repeating what I said.
290
00:17:56,208 --> 00:17:59,234
- Oh, I'm a time traveler?
- This is a show!
291
00:18:05,417 --> 00:18:06,441
Abed.
292
00:18:06,685 --> 00:18:10,712
I just got word from Diane that one
of your e-mails was a little shaky.
293
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:13,892
- Are you okay?
- I'm good. Late night last night.
294
00:18:14,393 --> 00:18:15,883
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
295
00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:17,790
I could use a little protein.
296
00:18:17,996 --> 00:18:20,226
I'm gonna go get an early lunch.
297
00:18:23,969 --> 00:18:25,493
You guys know about tardigrades?
298
00:18:25,704 --> 00:18:28,400
They're microscopic creatures
that look like robot bears.
299
00:18:28,574 --> 00:18:29,905
They can survive in space.
300
00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:33,408
Get into space,
you dirty tardigrades, see?
301
00:18:35,214 --> 00:18:36,408
And they're everywhere.
302
00:18:36,582 --> 00:18:39,415
There's things in real life
that are as cool as fake stuff.
303
00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:43,213
I learned that working for Frankie.
You guys would like her, you know.
304
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:47,255
- Raid!
- Ah!
305
00:18:49,528 --> 00:18:52,463
Is this what you guys want?
306
00:18:52,631 --> 00:18:54,792
You wanna play cops and robbers
with costumes?
307
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:57,764
- Why is that guy a carrot?
- Because they ran out.
308
00:18:57,970 --> 00:18:59,961
- Who tattled?
- In what world, Britta...
309
00:19:00,172 --> 00:19:03,369
...do you see this as covert enough
to require tattling?
310
00:19:03,609 --> 00:19:06,043
You built a bar in a school.
311
00:19:06,278 --> 00:19:08,269
There was lumber involved.
312
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:10,744
I have been letting you
hole up down here...
313
00:19:10,949 --> 00:19:13,247
...because it kept you contained
and satisfied.
314
00:19:13,452 --> 00:19:16,387
Because you are all
compulsively defiant.
315
00:19:16,622 --> 00:19:17,884
But it wasn't enough.
316
00:19:18,123 --> 00:19:21,251
You had to drag Abed back in.
And Abed deserves better.
317
00:19:21,460 --> 00:19:23,826
- Oh.
Oh, ho-ho-ho.
318
00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:28,262
It finally comes out.
Abed deserves better.
319
00:19:28,467 --> 00:19:29,627
That's been out.
320
00:19:29,835 --> 00:19:33,293
Shut up, Leonard. I once mistook
six people for you in a pharmacy.
321
00:19:33,505 --> 00:19:37,202
It's not their fault, Frankie.
I chose this. These are my friends.
322
00:19:37,376 --> 00:19:39,844
I hate e-mailing Diane.
She can't commit to a font.
323
00:19:40,045 --> 00:19:42,172
It's pathological. And so am I.
324
00:19:42,381 --> 00:19:43,541
This is where I belong.
325
00:19:43,782 --> 00:19:47,513
I know you think that, Abed,
but you don't know any better.
326
00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:53,381
- Oops.
- Uh... Uh...
327
00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:55,524
Shut up, Leonard.
328
00:19:55,727 --> 00:19:58,491
You are... You are old...
329
00:19:58,697 --> 00:20:01,996
...and you deserve less
because of your age.
330
00:20:02,167 --> 00:20:04,931
I don't believe that.
I'm just trying to... I'm trying to...
331
00:20:05,170 --> 00:20:08,867
And everybody here is a fart!
332
00:20:09,441 --> 00:20:14,071
A living fart
from the butt of a lesser god!
333
00:20:14,313 --> 00:20:16,406
And I'm... I'm better than this.
334
00:20:19,685 --> 00:20:23,951
Cut to everyone-on-campus-
getting-as-drunk-as-they-want montage.
335
00:20:24,189 --> 00:20:25,713
Yeah!
336
00:20:31,763 --> 00:20:32,855
Whoo!
337
00:20:33,732 --> 00:20:35,199
Whoo!
338
00:20:36,335 --> 00:20:37,427
Ah!
339
00:20:39,404 --> 00:20:42,373
Jeffrey? Frankie hasn't come back
to work today.
340
00:20:42,574 --> 00:20:43,939
That's terrible.
341
00:20:44,109 --> 00:20:46,907
Insurance company dropped us.
The school has no insurance.
342
00:20:47,112 --> 00:20:48,841
- What was Frankie's salary?
- A lot.
343
00:20:49,047 --> 00:20:50,412
- Insurance premiums?
- A lot.
344
00:20:50,616 --> 00:20:53,141
Add those together.
That's your school dance budget.
345
00:20:53,385 --> 00:20:55,376
Oh, nice.
346
00:20:57,589 --> 00:21:00,251
Welcome to Ladders!
347
00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:04,392
Yeah!
348
00:21:13,505 --> 00:21:16,235
Ladders!
349
00:21:17,009 --> 00:21:20,775
Who wants to see
the Ladders professor go higher?
350
00:21:23,982 --> 00:21:27,418
- Ladders!
- Whoa, whoa. Ah!
351
00:21:29,621 --> 00:21:31,145
You did it, Jeff Winger.
352
00:21:31,390 --> 00:21:32,982
This is your school now.
353
00:21:38,497 --> 00:21:40,590
- Annie.
- It was worth it.
354
00:21:42,200 --> 00:21:43,292
Ah!
355
00:21:52,110 --> 00:21:55,477
All right. That should be the extent
of the professor's medical bills.
356
00:21:55,647 --> 00:21:57,672
What about the lawsuits
from the students?
357
00:21:57,849 --> 00:21:59,316
I think we should fight those.
358
00:21:59,518 --> 00:22:01,611
Actually, I suggest you settle
out of court.
359
00:22:01,787 --> 00:22:04,221
- This is my fault.
- Obviously not. It's my fault.
360
00:22:04,456 --> 00:22:06,321
- Guys, it's my fault.
- It's my fault.
361
00:22:06,491 --> 00:22:07,958
- It's my fault.
- It's my fault.
362
00:22:08,126 --> 00:22:09,320
- It's my fault.
- My fault.
363
00:22:09,494 --> 00:22:10,961
- It's my fault.
- It's my fault.
364
00:22:11,129 --> 00:22:12,619
- It's my fault.
- It's my fault.
365
00:22:12,798 --> 00:22:16,928
It's my fault. It's my fault. It's my fault.
366
00:22:17,135 --> 00:22:20,036
All right, all right, all right!
So whose fault wasn't it...
367
00:22:20,238 --> 00:22:24,538
...and who knows anything
about handling anything like this?
368
00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:27,543
In terms of hierarchy,
I'm a big believer in it.
369
00:22:27,713 --> 00:22:30,705
Someone needs to say, "I'm in charge,"
and that person is me.
370
00:22:30,949 --> 00:22:33,474
That's my decision.
371
00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:35,513
Wait. What?
372
00:22:35,687 --> 00:22:37,211
- I'm sorry?
- Who talks like that?
373
00:22:37,456 --> 00:22:39,890
Why would anyone hire someone
so pompous?
374
00:22:40,092 --> 00:22:42,686
Miss Dart, word of advice.
Change your personality...
375
00:22:42,861 --> 00:22:45,489
...or start looking for companies
run by insane people.
376
00:22:45,697 --> 00:22:46,721
Don't hire this woman!
377
00:22:46,965 --> 00:22:50,423
Fifth time's the charm.
He's barged into four offices screaming.
378
00:22:50,602 --> 00:22:53,093
- What the hell is going on?
- What are you doing here?
379
00:22:53,271 --> 00:22:55,466
- How did you even find me?
- I e-mailed Diane.
380
00:22:55,674 --> 00:22:57,505
She knows too much
about your schedule.
381
00:22:57,676 --> 00:23:01,271
Whatever he's offering you, Greendale...
Well, we can't double it.
382
00:23:01,513 --> 00:23:03,037
We probably can't even match it.
383
00:23:03,248 --> 00:23:07,082
Whatever he's offering you,
Greendale will give you less...
384
00:23:07,285 --> 00:23:08,377
...and an apology.
385
00:23:08,587 --> 00:23:10,612
- Do you know...?
- Shh.
386
00:23:12,991 --> 00:23:14,219
It's not enough.
387
00:23:15,093 --> 00:23:19,757
But maybe
if you added more apologies...
388
00:23:20,198 --> 00:23:21,529
Like a montage of them?
389
00:23:25,871 --> 00:23:27,862
- We're sorry.
- We're sorry.
390
00:23:29,274 --> 00:23:30,741
We're sorry.
391
00:23:32,911 --> 00:23:35,038
We're sorry.
392
00:23:52,531 --> 00:23:54,726
We're...
- Sorry.
393
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:30,324
- A flyer.
- Thanks.
394
00:24:30,569 --> 00:24:31,593
Take a look.
395
00:24:31,803 --> 00:24:34,465
Okay, is that clear to everyone?
396
00:25:16,982 --> 00:25:19,246
I told you
I wouldn't be needing dinner tonight.
397
00:25:19,417 --> 00:25:22,352
I'm guessing you wouldn't.
Not if you're looking for this.
398
00:25:24,923 --> 00:25:27,187
- How did you know?
- Nobody makes more crumbs...
399
00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:30,692
...than a cook. Well, the same goes
for clues and detectives.
400
00:25:30,862 --> 00:25:33,660
You're too busy solving murders
to get away with your own.
401
00:25:33,832 --> 00:25:36,665
Well, what about the case
of my wife and my leg, Shirley?
402
00:25:36,835 --> 00:25:38,564
Can you solve that one,
huh, can you?
403
00:25:38,770 --> 00:25:41,603
Because if you can't,
then I ain't got nothing to live for.
404
00:25:41,773 --> 00:25:43,536
Begging your pardon, Mr. Butcher.
405
00:25:43,742 --> 00:25:46,233
I think the people on this bayou
would disagree.
406
00:25:46,444 --> 00:25:49,072
- You rescued a runaway girl today.
- Rescued? Balls!
407
00:25:49,281 --> 00:25:52,375
I couldn't even rescue a bulb
from a socket...
408
00:25:52,584 --> 00:25:53,949
...and you did all the work.
409
00:25:54,185 --> 00:25:57,086
I'm just a detective
from the swamps of Atlanta.
410
00:25:57,289 --> 00:25:58,449
Can't even walk!
411
00:25:58,690 --> 00:25:59,918
- Oh!
- Oh! Oh! Unh!
412
00:26:00,091 --> 00:26:02,059
Then let me be your legs.
413
00:26:02,260 --> 00:26:05,752
Let me do for you what I did today
every week until you find your wife...
414
00:26:05,931 --> 00:26:07,057
...or your legs.
415
00:26:07,265 --> 00:26:11,531
Oh, you are a stubborn son of a bitch,
Shirley Bennett.
416
00:26:11,703 --> 00:26:13,432
Now, come on. I have dinner to make.
417
00:26:13,605 --> 00:26:15,232
You got cases to solve.
418
00:26:21,546 --> 00:26:25,676
I have a feeling someone's
gonna murder some Tater Tots tonight.
419
00:26:25,884 --> 00:26:28,375
That's no mystery at all.
420
00:26:40,131 --> 00:26:42,065
Next week
on The Butcher and the Baker:
421
00:26:42,233 --> 00:26:45,327
When a new detective disappears
and Butcher is the prime suspect...
422
00:26:45,503 --> 00:26:47,698
...it's up to Shirley
to cook up some answers.
423
00:26:53,500 --> 00:27:01,500
Ripped By mstoll