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Sync & corrections by PetaG
- www.addic7ed.com -
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You okay?
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I think I'm having a panic attack.
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Oh, man.
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I can still breathe, so I don't
know if it counts as a panic attack
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if I can still breathe,
but my heart is really...
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maybe slowed down.
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Are the kids still in there?
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In the classroom where you left them? Yeah.
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Great, great.
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Apparently Ashanti brought a
gerbil to school in her pocket
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and crushed its brain,
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so they've moved on to
bigger and better things.
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Is that something that happens a lot?
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There's just been a lot going
on lately with my... family.
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Yeah.
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My dad decided that he's, um...
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well, I don't know if he
decided, he just figured...
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he's not...
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You know what? Don't need to tell me.
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Okay.
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I'm gonna go back up there in a second.
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I just need to breathe a little
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and then I'm gonna be ready to rock.
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Everything's under control up there.
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You take as much time as you need.
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Is this okay?
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So I was really inspired
by working on his campaign
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and, you know, seeing
all of the change
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that he's already been able
to make in his neighborhood
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regarding the traffic lights.
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It reinvigorated my job
search, so here I am.
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And I don't think that I need
to overplay my résumé, you know?
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It's not exhaustive, but I have really
stuck with the jobs that I've had
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and I am incredibly educated about
the current corporate climate
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and also what marketing
means in the digital age.
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Well, I think you just really
hit the nail on the head.
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I mean, that's the company ethos,
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and we want employees who understand
the lifestyle and the message,
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so I think there is a position
you'd be perfect for.
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- It involves marketing...
- A passion area.
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- ...and social media...
- Okay, also, like, a joy of mine.
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...and acting as a liaison between
our Japanese brand leadership
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and our American sales team.
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Amazing.
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Um, but how would you feel
about relocating to Tokyo?
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At least for the time being.
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Um... me?
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Yeah, you.
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Tokyo.
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It's the coolest.
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We have a great team of
expats working in Tokyo,
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and they've all found the
city hijo ni subarashii,
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which means "very nice" in Japanese.
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Japanese is super easy to get the hang of.
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It's just, like, four sounds
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that you kind of, like,
loop around and put together.
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It's like, "hi," and then like, "jo."
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Um, so, like, how frequently do you go...
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travel to Japan?
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I have not been.
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But I get a lot of visual
aids from the Internet
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and I have Skyped with people in Tokyo.
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I'll go, like, "Hi!"
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And they will do "Hi!" back.
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Um, can... is, uh... is it possible
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to think about it just for a moment?
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Totally. Think about it.
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I probably need to know
by Wednesday, probably.
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- Okay.
- Okay?
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To be completely frank,
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Lydia, who is currently
holding the position,
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is, um, bipolar.
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- Oh.
- And we are gonna fire her
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pretty much the minute she's
on a manic upswing. So...
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- Japan.
- Yeah.
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Yes!
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Oh, yes!
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Oh!
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- Hannah.
- Hey, Laird.
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Wow, glad you made it.
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Come in, shoeless, of course.
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You sure everything's okay in here?
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- 'Cause...
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
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Those are just shouts
of maternal celebration.
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Hon Bun, look who it is.
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Oh, Hannah.
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Hannah. It's my birth, Hannah.
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Yeah.
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No, it's great. It seems...
fun and relaxed.
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And, like, you just... you got this, girl.
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So I'm gonna head back upstairs. Bye.
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No, no, Hannah. Stay, stay, please stay.
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Yeah.
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Laird is my doula,
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and between you and me,
he could use a little help.
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Well, I'm not officially trained.
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Caroline just told me everything she knows
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and I already cried once. So...
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Is Caroline even a doula?
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Yep, almost.
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She is almost a doula.
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Okay, well, I don't
actually think this is legal,
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to self-doula.
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Yeah, this is pretty legal, right?
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Fuck the legal system.
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Uh, we're trying to
keep a positive spin on things.
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This baby is a month and a half early,
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but it knows that we are ready, right?
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We are ready and waiting
for you to come out.
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Oh, you want Hannah to stay?
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Oh, you want Hannah to stay?
Yeah, that's a great idea.
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- That is so beautiful.
- Thank you.
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- Antique. Yeah.
- Congratulations.
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Oh, my God, you're a record company
president. You do not care about my ring.
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- No, of course I do.
- I'm such a dork!
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- Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed.
- No, it's beautiful.
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- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
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Thank you. We're so happy.
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Marriage is such an antiquated
concept on so many levels,
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but until they discover something better,
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you know, this is really
the only way I know how
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to express my eternal devotion to Marnie.
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Oh, my God.
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Plus, I don't believe in tattoos,
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so this is our only option.
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All I can say is that marriage
is the best thing I ever did.
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- I love hearing that.
- Oh, God, yeah.
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How long have you been married for, Marcos?
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Um, ten years now, including
this most recent separation.
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- Oh.
- I'm sorry to hear that.
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I mean, actually, the
hardest part is actually
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just trying to FaceTime with
Piper and she's only three.
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She keeps trying to touch
Daddy's face through the screen
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and gets really confused and starts...
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Wow, I'm really sorry.
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No, I'm sorry.
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- Holy shit, I'm sorry.
- No.
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You guys are not lunatics,
so you're gonna make it.
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And let's talk about the showcase.
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I just want to get your equipment needs
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so I can get them to the
guitar techs and everyone.
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Wow, totally.
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I can't believe how hands-on you are.
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You're the label president. This is crazy.
146
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No, no, let's just pretend we're all
doing this together in a garage somewhere.
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Okay, well, all of our gear
is in the back of Desi's truck,
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so it won't be that hard to pretend.
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- Great, I'll be your roadie.
- Perfect.
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Why don't you guys do
that? Let me get this.
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Bye, Ray-Ray.
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Ray...
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I gotta settle up. We had three espressos,
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two of these delicious scones,
and, um, one glass of water.
155
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Water's free.
156
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Oh, that's a very generous policy.
157
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Hey, Ray, let me ask you something, man.
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Are we solid?
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Excuse me?
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Are you and I solid, you know?
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Are we simpatico?
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Because sometimes I get this
sense that there's some...
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tension or like a bad line.
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Not really between us, but
specifically from you to me.
165
00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:05,419
Well, I really wouldn't
worry about it if I were you.
166
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Okay, but you know what?
167
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I do worry about those kinds of things
168
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'cause I'm exactly the kind
of person that needs to know
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that none of my lines are faulty, you know?
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That-that I'm making
everybody around me happy.
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- That make sense?
- It does, it does make sense.
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Unfortunately, Desi, you're not gonna
get that assurance from me today.
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- Okay.
- Okay?
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Can you expound on that?
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You're not gonna get that assurance from me
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because I fucking hate you.
177
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Well, I totally get that we're from
very different parts of the world,
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00:08:38,786 --> 00:08:41,955
and I don't expect everybody here to...
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00:08:41,957 --> 00:08:45,125
fully understand my kind
of Pacific Northwest thing.
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Your whole Boston vibe
can be very abrasive.
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00:08:48,012 --> 00:08:49,963
- Okay, that's...
- Desi, this isn't about where you're from.
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- Okay.
- Okay?
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- This isn't about geography.
- Uh-huh.
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This is about that distressed
shirt you're wearing.
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This is about the fact that you
have eyeliner on your face right now.
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This is about the fact that your
musical sensibility is insufferable.
187
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Don't ever think that
you get onstage anywhere
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where a vast majority of the
crowd doesn't think "douche."
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Douche.
190
00:09:11,402 --> 00:09:13,570
You know how you feel when
you watch Imagine Dragons play?
191
00:09:13,621 --> 00:09:15,238
Well, that's how we feel about you.
192
00:09:15,289 --> 00:09:18,492
And you know what? Imagine Dragons
are great and you're the douche.
193
00:09:18,494 --> 00:09:20,160
You know, if we just take a minute
194
00:09:20,211 --> 00:09:23,888
and put our hearts together,
you and me right here,
195
00:09:23,901 --> 00:09:26,883
I think we'll both find
196
00:09:26,918 --> 00:09:29,002
that we're not really all that different.
197
00:09:29,004 --> 00:09:31,054
But we are different.
198
00:09:31,089 --> 00:09:35,425
We are very different, because I
would never treat her like shit.
199
00:09:35,476 --> 00:09:37,344
Who, Marnie?
200
00:09:37,346 --> 00:09:40,680
Yes, Marnie. Marnie Michaels.
201
00:09:40,731 --> 00:09:43,650
Okay, now you're talking about my fiancée,
202
00:09:43,684 --> 00:09:46,603
and I strongly suggest, Ray,
that you proceed with caution.
203
00:09:46,654 --> 00:09:47,988
Yeah, I know she's your fiancée.
204
00:09:48,022 --> 00:09:51,191
I also know that you
absolutely do not deserve her.
205
00:09:51,242 --> 00:09:53,026
Even remotely.
206
00:09:53,077 --> 00:09:54,995
You string her along for months
207
00:09:55,029 --> 00:09:56,413
and now you've proposed to her
208
00:09:56,447 --> 00:09:59,199
in some desperate bid to
make it seem like you're not
209
00:09:59,201 --> 00:10:01,168
the most selfish person in
the western fucking hemisphere,
210
00:10:01,202 --> 00:10:02,919
but you know what, Desi?
211
00:10:02,954 --> 00:10:04,371
I'm onto you.
212
00:10:04,373 --> 00:10:09,126
Marnie isn't some tool for
you to stroke your ego with.
213
00:10:09,177 --> 00:10:12,045
She's a beautiful, fully formed woman,
214
00:10:12,047 --> 00:10:15,515
dazzling in her complexity,
maddening in her mystery,
215
00:10:15,550 --> 00:10:18,351
and you underestimate
her every fucking day.
216
00:10:18,386 --> 00:10:22,856
And because of that, you will never, ever
217
00:10:22,890 --> 00:10:24,307
make her truly happy.
218
00:10:24,358 --> 00:10:26,893
Truly, deeply, fundamentally happy.
219
00:10:26,895 --> 00:10:30,030
You're gonna try and fuck
up and try and fuck up again.
220
00:10:30,064 --> 00:10:34,901
And every time, she will
smile and take you back.
221
00:10:39,157 --> 00:10:41,241
Well, thank you for that.
222
00:10:41,292 --> 00:10:43,793
Keep your fucking blood money.
223
00:10:49,300 --> 00:10:51,918
I love it when you join me for lunch.
224
00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:53,920
I go back to the office and I'm invigorated
225
00:10:53,922 --> 00:10:57,557
and I have all these great ideas
and it's all because of you.
226
00:10:58,893 --> 00:11:01,928
Oh, so this weekend, Amagansett.
227
00:11:01,930 --> 00:11:06,183
Bryce is having one of his
famous, crazy, weird parties.
228
00:11:06,234 --> 00:11:08,818
I think he has, like, half of the cast
229
00:11:08,853 --> 00:11:11,771
of the Cirque du Soleil... um,
I can't remember... the sexy one.
230
00:11:11,773 --> 00:11:13,857
Anyway, it's gonna be really great.
231
00:11:13,908 --> 00:11:15,992
- Hey, I have to tell you something.
- Mm-hmm?
232
00:11:16,027 --> 00:11:18,862
Um... I got a job.
233
00:11:18,913 --> 00:11:20,447
- Oh, my God!
- Yeah.
234
00:11:20,449 --> 00:11:23,500
- That's so cool.
- Yeah, um...
235
00:11:23,534 --> 00:11:25,202
in Japan.
236
00:11:25,253 --> 00:11:26,703
It's really... it's incredible.
237
00:11:26,754 --> 00:11:28,622
It's, um... it's, like,
a very high-level job.
238
00:11:28,624 --> 00:11:31,458
It's in marketing, it's kind of...
it-it's... I... no, it's my dream job.
239
00:11:31,460 --> 00:11:33,460
It's totally my dream job.
You know, I'm totally down
240
00:11:33,462 --> 00:11:35,762
to be your Japanese booty call
241
00:11:35,796 --> 00:11:38,119
and that's so fine and
amazing, but I just...
242
00:11:38,132 --> 00:11:38,573
Don't...
243
00:11:38,599 --> 00:11:40,402
- You know, it's like, we can continue
- Don't... don't take the job.
244
00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:41,159
- on the phone, and...
- Don't.
245
00:11:41,185 --> 00:11:43,386
- Shoshanna, don't take that job, okay?
- What?
246
00:11:43,437 --> 00:11:45,055
- Okay?
- Just... what?
247
00:11:45,106 --> 00:11:46,356
Just don't take it.
248
00:11:46,390 --> 00:11:47,974
You can work at Madame Tinsley's, okay?
249
00:11:48,025 --> 00:11:50,727
And move in with me. Yes, move in with me.
250
00:11:50,778 --> 00:11:53,313
I know that's fast, but
you can't go to Japan.
251
00:11:53,364 --> 00:11:56,233
Don't take that job.
252
00:11:56,284 --> 00:11:59,920
- Um...
- I'm gonna be in love with you soon.
253
00:12:00,955 --> 00:12:03,323
Oh, okay.
254
00:12:10,748 --> 00:12:13,917
Uh, Laird, this whole
thing seems kind of crazy.
255
00:12:13,968 --> 00:12:15,802
Uh, how can it be crazy, Hannah?
256
00:12:15,836 --> 00:12:16,798
It's happening.
257
00:12:16,811 --> 00:12:20,257
Okay, yeah, but just because something's
happening doesn't mean it's not crazy.
258
00:12:20,308 --> 00:12:21,841
Doesn't it?
259
00:12:21,892 --> 00:12:23,793
No, crazy things happen every...
260
00:12:26,464 --> 00:12:28,348
Hey.
261
00:12:31,687 --> 00:12:34,020
No.
262
00:12:35,740 --> 00:12:38,275
Oh, I'm so happy you're here.
263
00:12:39,910 --> 00:12:41,494
What the fuck are you doing?
264
00:12:41,529 --> 00:12:45,081
Oh, even for you, that's
a dim little question.
265
00:12:47,868 --> 00:12:50,233
This is the dumbest idea
that's ever happened.
266
00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:51,871
That's what I was trying to tell them,
267
00:12:51,873 --> 00:12:54,124
only just in less kind of combative words.
268
00:12:54,175 --> 00:12:57,043
Oh, don't be so Western, you two.
269
00:12:57,094 --> 00:12:59,629
- Cover your boobs, please.
- Fine.
270
00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:03,883
But for obvious reasons, I'm
not gonna cover my vagina.
271
00:13:04,935 --> 00:13:07,270
We got it on lock, brother.
272
00:13:08,522 --> 00:13:10,890
What is that?
273
00:13:10,941 --> 00:13:15,562
Uh, we... we're... we got
the situation under control.
274
00:13:15,564 --> 00:13:17,897
We got it on lockdown.
275
00:13:17,899 --> 00:13:19,232
Oh, good to know.
276
00:13:19,234 --> 00:13:21,985
Because if there's a problem,
those are usually handled
277
00:13:22,036 --> 00:13:25,405
by modern fucking medicine!
278
00:13:25,407 --> 00:13:27,240
Fuck the modern fucking medicine, okay?
279
00:13:27,242 --> 00:13:28,875
I am not going to distance myself
280
00:13:28,909 --> 00:13:31,328
from the beautiful and
natural process that is birth
281
00:13:31,379 --> 00:13:35,382
by tubes and drugs and
fucking white lab coats.
282
00:13:35,416 --> 00:13:37,083
I'm going to inhabit my body
283
00:13:37,085 --> 00:13:39,085
and bring this baby into a world
284
00:13:39,136 --> 00:13:41,304
of aware, peaceful individuals
285
00:13:41,339 --> 00:13:42,922
and not fucking drug-addicted robots.
286
00:13:42,924 --> 00:13:45,273
So you would have open-heart
surgery in your living room?
287
00:13:45,286 --> 00:13:47,477
Maybe, yeah. Maybe I would.
288
00:13:47,511 --> 00:13:50,430
You know, I watched the Ricki
Lake-produced documentary
289
00:13:50,481 --> 00:13:52,432
"The Business of Being
Born," and it let me know
290
00:13:52,434 --> 00:13:54,351
that there's a lot of
different angles on this.
291
00:13:54,402 --> 00:13:56,820
I agree. There was a
"Tom and Jerry" episode...
292
00:13:56,854 --> 00:13:59,239
they were on the plains in frontier times
293
00:13:59,273 --> 00:14:03,610
and Tom was having a baby
and Jerry was a cowboy...
294
00:14:03,661 --> 00:14:05,945
Shut the fuck up!
295
00:14:05,947 --> 00:14:07,163
You listen to me.
296
00:14:07,198 --> 00:14:08,865
That is the father of my child, okay?
297
00:14:08,916 --> 00:14:11,451
And that man loves me and treats
me as I should be treated by a man
298
00:14:11,453 --> 00:14:13,286
and you don't talk to him like that, ever!
299
00:14:18,042 --> 00:14:19,914
Ray?
300
00:14:19,933 --> 00:14:22,011
Ray?
301
00:14:22,046 --> 00:14:24,681
- Ray!
- Ah, shush!
302
00:14:24,715 --> 00:14:26,633
You're making my migraine twerk.
303
00:14:26,684 --> 00:14:28,301
Hi, Hermie. Um, is Ray here?
304
00:14:28,303 --> 00:14:29,636
Because it's a little bit of an emergency
305
00:14:29,687 --> 00:14:31,221
and it also has a little
bit of a clock on it.
306
00:14:31,272 --> 00:14:32,972
Break a heel in a subway grate?
307
00:14:32,974 --> 00:14:34,774
No, actually.
308
00:14:34,809 --> 00:14:37,394
I was offered a high-powered job in Japan
309
00:14:37,445 --> 00:14:39,779
and I need his advice on
whether or not to take it.
310
00:14:39,814 --> 00:14:41,731
Well, Ray's not here right now.
311
00:14:41,782 --> 00:14:43,650
Okay, well, do you know where Ray is?
312
00:14:43,701 --> 00:14:45,151
Ray's a politician now.
313
00:14:45,202 --> 00:14:47,287
He's shaking hands and kissing babies.
314
00:14:47,321 --> 00:14:50,790
That's his life. We're
no longer part of it.
315
00:14:52,828 --> 00:14:55,628
Job offer in Japan's
not a bad thing to have.
316
00:14:56,714 --> 00:14:59,299
Yeah, I guess so.
317
00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:02,335
I don't know if I'm
gonna take it. I just...
318
00:15:02,337 --> 00:15:05,588
I'm kind of on the precipice of,
like, possibly falling in love
319
00:15:05,639 --> 00:15:07,868
with a very successful, very kind,
320
00:15:07,899 --> 00:15:09,676
very fashionable man,
321
00:15:09,678 --> 00:15:11,644
and I just feel like if I don't
give this relationship a shot,
322
00:15:11,679 --> 00:15:12,980
then I'm gonna regret it my entire life.
323
00:15:12,992 --> 00:15:14,931
And he offered me a job at
his company, so I feel like...
324
00:15:14,982 --> 00:15:17,767
Stop, stop, stop, please.
325
00:15:17,818 --> 00:15:19,652
What, does that... does
that not make sense?
326
00:15:19,687 --> 00:15:21,905
It makes sense like a Danielle Steel novel
327
00:15:21,939 --> 00:15:23,440
makes sense to a woman with emphysema.
328
00:15:23,491 --> 00:15:25,191
I'm gonna tell you something.
329
00:15:25,242 --> 00:15:28,361
Be the walker, not the dog.
330
00:15:29,363 --> 00:15:30,864
What?
331
00:15:30,915 --> 00:15:34,284
You familiar with the work
of the writer Sheryl Sandberg?
332
00:15:34,335 --> 00:15:36,870
Um, yes, I'm familiar with the works
333
00:15:36,921 --> 00:15:39,873
of the writer Sheryl Sandberg. Are you?
334
00:15:39,924 --> 00:15:42,592
Yes, my wife left a copy out
and I saw an attractive woman,
335
00:15:42,626 --> 00:15:44,511
I read the book. I'm a convert.
336
00:15:44,545 --> 00:15:46,463
This is your "Lean In" moment.
337
00:15:46,514 --> 00:15:48,047
This is your moment to lean in.
338
00:15:48,049 --> 00:15:50,884
You don't want to be dependent
on some guy, some nerd.
339
00:15:50,935 --> 00:15:53,603
Don't give the power to your partner.
340
00:15:53,637 --> 00:15:56,022
Grab a seat at the table
and lean the fuck in.
341
00:15:56,056 --> 00:15:58,358
And if this guy's worth his salt,
342
00:15:58,392 --> 00:16:01,478
he'll be waiting for you at
the airport when you return.
343
00:16:01,529 --> 00:16:04,731
This is for you, taking what's yours.
344
00:16:04,782 --> 00:16:06,533
Attainment, achievement...
345
00:16:06,567 --> 00:16:08,401
this is your time to grasp your destiny.
346
00:16:08,403 --> 00:16:10,320
- What you...
- Yeah, no, I get it, I get it, I get it.
347
00:16:10,371 --> 00:16:11,704
Thank you.
348
00:16:12,965 --> 00:16:15,408
You are very strange.
349
00:16:15,410 --> 00:16:17,994
But you're very wise.
350
00:16:20,164 --> 00:16:23,833
I want to go in there and see what's
happening so bad. Do you think it's gory?
351
00:16:23,884 --> 00:16:26,753
No, it just looks like me after I've
eaten, like, a big Mexican dinner.
352
00:16:26,755 --> 00:16:29,088
- Hannah.
- No, but, like, her actual pussy.
353
00:16:29,090 --> 00:16:31,891
- What's happening?
- Oh, I didn't get to see her pussy.
354
00:16:31,926 --> 00:16:34,594
Adam, did you see it?
355
00:16:34,645 --> 00:16:37,276
I didn't fucking look.
That's my fucking sister!
356
00:16:37,289 --> 00:16:40,400
Adam, maybe you should look
because it's your sister.
357
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:48,692
Okay, something is not right.
358
00:16:48,705 --> 00:16:50,117
Motherfucker, I told you.
359
00:16:50,149 --> 00:16:51,417
I think something is really wrong.
360
00:16:51,430 --> 00:16:53,746
Okay, Laird, we need
you to be more articulate
361
00:16:53,781 --> 00:16:55,331
if you want us to help you.
362
00:16:55,366 --> 00:16:57,834
Okay, she... she is writhing in pain
363
00:16:57,868 --> 00:16:59,369
and she is really feeling it,
364
00:16:59,420 --> 00:17:02,362
and she is screaming... you can all
currently hear all that right now.
365
00:17:02,363 --> 00:17:05,291
And even I know that that
should not happen unless...
366
00:17:05,342 --> 00:17:08,461
you're supposed to be five to ten
dilated for that kind of pain, right?
367
00:17:08,463 --> 00:17:10,213
And she is only three fingers wide.
368
00:17:10,264 --> 00:17:12,515
I'm calling an ambulance.
Motherfucker, I know where you live.
369
00:17:12,550 --> 00:17:14,968
No, you are not calling an... hey, no.
370
00:17:15,019 --> 00:17:18,054
She will not go to a hospital.
That is not in her birth plan.
371
00:17:18,088 --> 00:17:19,472
What the fuck is a birth plan?
372
00:17:19,523 --> 00:17:21,307
I think it's pretty self-explanatory.
373
00:17:21,358 --> 00:17:23,476
It's the plan you have for the
way you're gonna give birth,
374
00:17:23,527 --> 00:17:27,063
like, "I'm gonna take the stuff that
Michael Jackson took to sleep," all right?
375
00:17:27,114 --> 00:17:28,865
We need to call a doctor.
376
00:17:28,899 --> 00:17:30,233
We are not calling a doctor,
377
00:17:30,284 --> 00:17:31,985
we are not going to the hospital.
378
00:17:31,987 --> 00:17:34,370
She will murder me. Are you kidding? No.
379
00:17:34,405 --> 00:17:36,573
You guys are all pussies, every one of you.
380
00:17:42,796 --> 00:17:46,249
Okay, Caroline, talk to me.
381
00:17:46,300 --> 00:17:48,167
It hurts like a motherfucker, Jess.
382
00:17:48,218 --> 00:17:49,302
Low, real low.
383
00:17:49,336 --> 00:17:50,670
I think she might be breach.
384
00:17:50,672 --> 00:17:52,422
I need you to check, okay?
385
00:17:52,473 --> 00:17:53,590
Holy shitfuck.
386
00:17:55,510 --> 00:17:57,093
Uh, hey, man, I can do it.
387
00:17:57,144 --> 00:17:59,178
Stay the fuck away from me, Laird.
388
00:17:59,180 --> 00:18:01,931
Laird, this isn't for you.
389
00:18:08,272 --> 00:18:10,106
Oh!
390
00:18:13,027 --> 00:18:14,327
- I saw a foot.
- Oh, God, oh, God.
391
00:18:14,361 --> 00:18:16,245
- Okay, okay, it's breaching.
- Oh my God, oh my God.
392
00:18:17,123 --> 00:18:18,911
I can deliver. People do it every day.
393
00:18:18,923 --> 00:18:21,701
Baby, we need to go to a
hospital right now, okay?
394
00:18:21,703 --> 00:18:22,919
Oh, God!
395
00:18:22,953 --> 00:18:24,454
You're just like the rest of them.
396
00:18:24,505 --> 00:18:27,040
You're all part of the fucking
birth industrial complex!
397
00:18:27,091 --> 00:18:29,125
It's a goddamn conspiracy.
398
00:18:29,176 --> 00:18:31,210
- Okay...
- I'm gonna deliver this baby by myself
399
00:18:31,212 --> 00:18:33,846
like a teenager in the
heartland if I have to!
400
00:18:33,881 --> 00:18:37,121
Caroline, listen to me.
Listen to me right now.
401
00:18:37,139 --> 00:18:38,718
No. I'm shutting everybody out.
402
00:18:38,720 --> 00:18:41,187
I'm not listening to any
more bullshit with my ears.
403
00:18:41,221 --> 00:18:42,772
I'm not gonna hear any of you ever again,
404
00:18:42,806 --> 00:18:44,724
not ever, not ever, not ever once again.
405
00:18:47,277 --> 00:18:48,756
- Laird?
- What?
406
00:18:48,757 --> 00:18:51,948
You need to get your wife out of the tub.
407
00:18:51,982 --> 00:18:53,566
We're not married, okay?
408
00:18:53,617 --> 00:18:55,568
I just wear this 'cause
it makes me feel good.
409
00:18:55,570 --> 00:18:59,822
Laird, I need you and she
needs you to be a man right now.
410
00:18:59,873 --> 00:19:01,574
But I'm not a man.
411
00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:07,347
I'm a Jewish recovering
junkie and I weigh 135 pounds!
412
00:19:07,381 --> 00:19:10,583
Okay, I know you're scared right now,
413
00:19:10,634 --> 00:19:13,886
but if there was ever a
time to not be pathetic,
414
00:19:13,921 --> 00:19:15,805
it's now.
415
00:19:15,839 --> 00:19:19,092
I think later is my time.
416
00:19:19,094 --> 00:19:22,095
That's when my time usually is, is later.
417
00:19:22,097 --> 00:19:23,896
I'm gonna walk out the room,
418
00:19:23,931 --> 00:19:25,431
you guys are gonna have a moment,
419
00:19:25,482 --> 00:19:27,934
and you're gonna get her out of the tub.
420
00:19:31,606 --> 00:19:33,606
Caroline...
421
00:19:33,608 --> 00:19:37,110
you need to get out of the fucking tub!
422
00:19:37,161 --> 00:19:38,861
Eat shit, bitch!
423
00:19:38,924 --> 00:19:41,528
Desi, you really have to call me back.
424
00:19:41,541 --> 00:19:44,450
We go on in half an hour.
You missed our sound check.
425
00:19:44,452 --> 00:19:46,786
It's fine. I'm honestly
just worried about you,
426
00:19:46,837 --> 00:19:48,254
but please, sweetie, just call me back.
427
00:19:48,288 --> 00:19:50,123
Bye.
428
00:19:50,174 --> 00:19:51,708
Any news we can use?
429
00:19:51,759 --> 00:19:54,093
No, but, I mean, I'm sure
he'll be here any second.
430
00:19:54,128 --> 00:19:56,429
Yeah, he's probably just,
like, around the corner.
431
00:19:56,463 --> 00:19:59,132
Okay, all the blogs are here...
"Brooklyn Vegan," "Pitchfork,"
432
00:19:59,134 --> 00:20:01,300
"The Fader," "Iron Throng," "Bad Breath."
433
00:20:01,302 --> 00:20:02,802
I know, and it's really unlike him.
434
00:20:02,853 --> 00:20:05,605
Like, when it comes to his
music, he's usually so punctual,
435
00:20:05,639 --> 00:20:07,473
so I'm sure he's, like, about to get here.
436
00:20:07,475 --> 00:20:10,877
Well, I mean, let's just hope
he didn't Jeff Buckley it, right?
437
00:20:10,911 --> 00:20:12,812
Do you mean drown?
438
00:20:12,863 --> 00:20:15,782
Yeah, you know, Amy Winehouse it,
439
00:20:15,816 --> 00:20:17,650
Janis Joplin it, Hendrix himself...
440
00:20:17,652 --> 00:20:20,987
Um, yeah, I hope he didn't die either.
441
00:20:21,038 --> 00:20:23,406
Hey, dudes. Ready to rock?
442
00:20:26,410 --> 00:20:27,722
Is the ambulance here?
443
00:20:27,735 --> 00:20:30,772
Um, I just Wazed it, and I think
it's actually better if we walk.
444
00:20:30,773 --> 00:20:35,362
I'm not walking, you fucking
baby-murdering cuntmonster!
445
00:20:35,369 --> 00:20:37,170
- Baby, it's okay.
- Damn it, no, it's not okay.
446
00:20:37,221 --> 00:20:38,504
Okay.
447
00:20:38,506 --> 00:20:42,809
Stop fucking touching my feet, you asshole!
448
00:20:42,843 --> 00:20:46,596
Get this fucking thing out of me!
449
00:20:46,647 --> 00:20:49,232
What? Don't drop me, don't drop me.
450
00:20:50,350 --> 00:20:52,485
This is pretty fucking disappointing.
451
00:20:52,519 --> 00:20:54,821
I know.
452
00:20:54,855 --> 00:20:57,657
No, I mean, like, madly disappointing.
453
00:20:57,691 --> 00:20:59,358
I know.
454
00:20:59,409 --> 00:21:01,027
But you're the one who
said that it should feel
455
00:21:01,078 --> 00:21:02,578
like we're all just in someone's garage.
456
00:21:02,613 --> 00:21:04,080
No, that's actually not what I said.
457
00:21:04,114 --> 00:21:06,082
What I... if you listened to
what I said, what I said is,
458
00:21:06,116 --> 00:21:09,202
"I like it when it feels like we're
in someone else's garage," okay?
459
00:21:09,253 --> 00:21:11,204
Don't twist my words around
at your own convenience.
460
00:21:11,206 --> 00:21:12,872
Listen to what I actually say.
461
00:21:12,874 --> 00:21:15,524
Okay, um...
462
00:21:15,543 --> 00:21:17,577
I'm really sorry.
463
00:21:17,611 --> 00:21:19,545
No, no, please don't cry.
464
00:21:19,596 --> 00:21:23,049
- What's going on?
- Well, uh, Desi is not here
465
00:21:23,100 --> 00:21:25,635
and it seems like he won't be here.
466
00:21:25,686 --> 00:21:26,528
What?
467
00:21:26,546 --> 00:21:28,354
Listen, let's just hope he's alive, okay?
468
00:21:28,388 --> 00:21:29,571
Jesus Christ.
469
00:21:29,572 --> 00:21:32,892
Yes, let's always hope
everyone we like is alive.
470
00:21:32,943 --> 00:21:34,894
I'm gonna just go
introduce Violent Ron early.
471
00:21:34,943 --> 00:21:38,057
You can go home, take a bath,
and we'll check in tomorrow, okay?
472
00:21:38,058 --> 00:21:40,058
What? No, fuck, no.
473
00:21:40,071 --> 00:21:42,535
No one's going home, taking a bath.
474
00:21:42,569 --> 00:21:44,704
You're gonna go up there and
you're gonna do this by yourself.
475
00:21:44,738 --> 00:21:46,405
What? No, I can't do that.
476
00:21:46,407 --> 00:21:48,074
I don't think she's much of a solo artist.
477
00:21:48,125 --> 00:21:48,988
- I don't think...
- No, I actually got
478
00:21:48,989 --> 00:21:50,409
my start as a solo artist
479
00:21:50,411 --> 00:21:52,912
and I am perfectly capable
of commanding such a crowd,
480
00:21:52,914 --> 00:21:55,748
but these are Marnie and Desi songs.
481
00:21:55,799 --> 00:21:58,167
I can't just do them alone.
482
00:21:58,202 --> 00:21:59,919
Marnie, listen to me, okay?
483
00:21:59,920 --> 00:22:02,072
And forgive the following sentence,
484
00:22:02,073 --> 00:22:03,784
but all that matters right now
485
00:22:03,785 --> 00:22:05,675
is that you keep the music alive.
486
00:22:05,709 --> 00:22:08,477
That's what Desi would want.
487
00:22:08,512 --> 00:22:11,047
Look, you want me to play
guitar? I'm actually pretty good.
488
00:22:12,514 --> 00:22:15,182
No.
489
00:22:15,603 --> 00:22:18,271
I'm pretty good, too.
490
00:22:21,408 --> 00:22:23,743
Don't worry about it, man.
She cries all the time.
491
00:22:23,777 --> 00:22:25,528
All the time.
492
00:22:44,047 --> 00:22:49,302
♪ Pack up your suitcase,
put on that dress ♪
493
00:22:49,304 --> 00:22:54,106
♪ We can make the 7:45 express ♪
494
00:22:54,141 --> 00:22:59,862
♪ And never look back,
and when we grow old ♪
495
00:22:59,897 --> 00:23:04,317
♪ It'll be a life of
all the stories we told ♪
496
00:23:04,319 --> 00:23:09,205
♪ 'Cause there's something
in the air tonight ♪
497
00:23:10,741 --> 00:23:17,563
♪ Maybe there's a fire
burning out in Riverside... ♪
498
00:23:17,598 --> 00:23:19,248
Oh, we have a baby, guys.
499
00:23:19,299 --> 00:23:22,218
We have a bouncing-ass baby.
500
00:23:22,252 --> 00:23:24,503
Where is it?
501
00:23:24,505 --> 00:23:26,722
They put her in a nice, warm box.
502
00:23:26,757 --> 00:23:28,641
- Thank fucking God.
- What is it?
503
00:23:28,675 --> 00:23:31,970
She is a sweet, sugary girl child.
504
00:23:31,971 --> 00:23:36,732
Her name is Jessa-Hannah
Bluebell Poem Schlesinger-Sackler.
505
00:23:36,767 --> 00:23:41,345
Four and a half pounds of
pure love and forgiveness.
506
00:23:41,346 --> 00:23:42,945
You named it Jessa?
507
00:23:42,946 --> 00:23:44,407
Well, they named it Jessa-Hannah.
508
00:23:44,441 --> 00:23:46,242
As the... yeah, hyphenate... right.
509
00:23:46,276 --> 00:23:47,994
Oh, my God.
510
00:23:48,028 --> 00:23:49,612
I mean, you saved us.
511
00:23:49,663 --> 00:23:52,999
You brought Jessa-Hannah
Bluebell Poem into this world.
512
00:23:53,033 --> 00:23:56,786
Oh, my God. I mean, I
just... I just talked.
513
00:23:56,837 --> 00:24:00,289
Well, you said more than words.
514
00:24:00,340 --> 00:24:02,675
I did, didn't I?
515
00:24:02,709 --> 00:24:08,881
♪ So you're closing the
case as you're walking away ♪
516
00:24:08,883 --> 00:24:14,186
♪ Maybe the truth would've
helped up to now ♪
517
00:24:14,221 --> 00:24:18,858
♪ But what you'd say you
could never just say ♪
518
00:24:18,892 --> 00:24:24,280
♪ Out loud ♪
519
00:24:24,314 --> 00:24:29,485
- ♪ That now it cannot be denied... ♪
- I'm going to become a therapist.
520
00:24:29,536 --> 00:24:31,821
I'm moving to Japan.
521
00:24:31,872 --> 00:24:33,656
Oh, my God.
522
00:24:33,707 --> 00:24:35,374
You're gonna be such a good therapist!
523
00:24:35,409 --> 00:24:38,561
I know! You're gonna make
a really great geisha.
524
00:24:40,814 --> 00:24:48,671
♪ Maybe there's a fire
burning out in Riverside. ♪
525
00:25:04,772 --> 00:25:06,856
Thank you. Thank you so much.
526
00:25:11,995 --> 00:25:14,551
- I'm shaking.
- I can see that.
527
00:25:14,569 --> 00:25:18,918
Oh, my God. That was the
scariest thing I have ever done.
528
00:25:18,952 --> 00:25:20,619
- How was it?
- It was good, yeah.
529
00:25:20,670 --> 00:25:22,427
It was really good. Really good.
530
00:25:22,428 --> 00:25:25,958
- What's wrong with you?
- Nothing.
531
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:27,593
Where's Desi? Did he come?
532
00:25:27,627 --> 00:25:29,261
I don't know.
533
00:25:36,937 --> 00:25:39,305
Jessa-Hannah.
534
00:25:39,339 --> 00:25:41,690
You were just born.
535
00:25:41,725 --> 00:25:45,061
- Jesus Christ.
- That's your Uncle Adam.
536
00:25:45,112 --> 00:25:48,898
And I'm gonna tell you some
things about being alive.
537
00:25:48,949 --> 00:25:52,318
Life, man...
538
00:25:52,320 --> 00:25:55,988
I can't guarantee perfection,
but I can guarantee intrigue.
539
00:25:55,990 --> 00:25:59,825
The idea that I had an
"ambilicord" is... is insane.
540
00:25:59,876 --> 00:26:02,694
- Umbilical cord.
- Umbilical cord.
541
00:26:02,695 --> 00:26:04,964
You wanna just know that.
It's a word you wanna know.
542
00:26:04,998 --> 00:26:07,999
- Umbilical cord.
- Yeah, good job.
543
00:26:08,011 --> 00:26:10,212
Mimi-Rose and I are over.
544
00:26:10,744 --> 00:26:12,945
Really?
545
00:26:16,893 --> 00:26:19,512
I'm sorry to hear that. I know
you really cared about her.
546
00:26:19,514 --> 00:26:22,848
Mm, I don't know that I did. I
don't think I really knew her.
547
00:26:22,850 --> 00:26:24,183
Yeah, but isn't that how we always feel?
548
00:26:24,234 --> 00:26:26,268
Like, when a relationship
ends, you're like,
549
00:26:26,319 --> 00:26:28,020
"What was that? Who was that?"
550
00:26:28,022 --> 00:26:30,072
And then you give it a few months
551
00:26:30,107 --> 00:26:31,574
and all the good memories come back
552
00:26:31,608 --> 00:26:33,692
and you can kinda live with it, I think.
553
00:26:33,694 --> 00:26:36,028
No, I just think I was confused.
554
00:26:37,531 --> 00:26:39,849
And I think I made a mistake.
555
00:26:41,665 --> 00:26:43,782
I miss you so badly.
556
00:26:47,207 --> 00:26:49,492
I think I just got lost in it all.
557
00:26:52,212 --> 00:26:54,380
And I didn't hold on to the right stuff
558
00:26:54,431 --> 00:26:56,215
and I let my center move.
559
00:26:57,884 --> 00:26:59,435
And I just got lost.
560
00:27:05,976 --> 00:27:07,560
Hannah?
561
00:27:07,611 --> 00:27:10,229
I think you're just really tired
and that you had a really long day
562
00:27:10,231 --> 00:27:12,781
and that you're gonna get some sleep
and you're gonna feel all better.
563
00:27:18,572 --> 00:27:20,356
No, I'm serious.
564
00:27:22,075 --> 00:27:23,792
I'm sorry.
565
00:27:23,827 --> 00:27:27,496
Really, I don't know where
the fuck I've been at.
566
00:27:27,547 --> 00:27:31,367
But, you know, I'm here now.
567
00:27:32,469 --> 00:27:34,854
Yeah, I'm...
568
00:27:34,888 --> 00:27:37,039
I can't do that.
569
00:27:38,391 --> 00:27:40,009
Please?
570
00:27:43,597 --> 00:27:45,481
I can't.
571
00:27:45,515 --> 00:27:48,267
Yeah, you can.
572
00:27:49,569 --> 00:27:52,187
I can't.
573
00:27:59,646 --> 00:28:01,363
Okay.
574
00:28:01,414 --> 00:28:03,282
That's fine.
575
00:28:03,284 --> 00:28:06,535
Okay.
576
00:28:14,177 --> 00:28:16,353
Honey, it's late.
577
00:28:16,372 --> 00:28:18,847
- Were you sleeping?
- No.
578
00:28:18,882 --> 00:28:23,519
Mommy, I just saw a baby get born, okay?
579
00:28:23,553 --> 00:28:26,305
Not a whole baby. First
it was just the foot
580
00:28:26,356 --> 00:28:29,942
and then it was the rest of the
baby. But I did. I saw a baby.
581
00:28:29,976 --> 00:28:31,940
It was the cutest thing
in the entire world.
582
00:28:31,947 --> 00:28:33,979
She's so small, but
her name is Jessa-Hannah
583
00:28:33,981 --> 00:28:35,948
and she seems real feisty.
584
00:28:35,982 --> 00:28:38,984
That's nice, honey. Babies are sweet.
585
00:28:39,986 --> 00:28:42,121
- Are you okay?
- Oh, I'm fine.
586
00:28:42,155 --> 00:28:43,789
I'll be fine.
587
00:28:43,823 --> 00:28:47,660
The sad part is I don't
really have a future.
588
00:28:47,662 --> 00:28:49,628
You have a future, though, Hannah.
589
00:28:49,663 --> 00:28:53,882
You're not like me, giving your
life to one man who ate it all up.
590
00:28:53,917 --> 00:28:57,002
You have time to go out
there and forge something new.
591
00:28:57,004 --> 00:28:59,838
You have time to go out there
and forge ten new things,
592
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:04,343
not just reenact, re-imagine
593
00:29:04,394 --> 00:29:09,565
the same old thing with
the same foolish man.
594
00:29:10,360 --> 00:29:12,851
Can I talk to Daddy?
595
00:29:12,902 --> 00:29:16,238
Oh, sure. She wants to talk to you.
596
00:29:17,157 --> 00:29:18,691
Hello?
597
00:29:18,742 --> 00:29:20,192
Hi.
598
00:29:23,218 --> 00:29:27,469
_
599
00:30:03,289 --> 00:30:07,789
Sync & corrections by PetaG
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