Well... now I find out
if six years of brutally hard work
was worth it.
I can't wait.
Josh, you go first.
What? Why me? I don't want to go first.
B-because if you passed, then I passed,
'cause God wouldn't be that cruel.
What if I failed?
Then I passed because I-I think of God more.
Oh, for Pete's sake, you two! I want to know how I did.
No! No!
I am so sorry, Maddie.
What? Oh!
Oh, no... I passed. I just broke a nail.
Talk about good news/bad news, huh?
So you passed? That's... that's great.
Yeah. Thank you.
Oh, no, no. It's great for me.
It means I must have passed, too.
I didn't pass.
I didn't... I didn't pass.
I didn't pass.
Wait, I-I don't see why that's funny.
- Because it's not! - Sorry.
My life... my life... my life is over.
I'm... I'm... this... This is like a nightmare.
That can't be right!
Uh, maybe they switched your results with Maddie.
T-that makes more sense, right?
Yeah. Yeah, really does.
Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up.
Stop it! You'll hurt yourself!
Yeah. You didn't do that before you took the test, did you?
Sorry.
I'm feeling superior.
Wow.
You passed, but Josh didn't.
What are you trying to tell me, God?!
- Sync and corrected by TheDelta - - www.addic7ed.com -
Easy, ama. We don't want to drop it.
I can't believe you wouldn't let them
put "congratulations" on the cake.
We can't assume.
When we make plans, God laughs.
Have I taught you nothing?
Yes, ama. God laughs at us.
You tell us that a lot.
We should have heard from Cris by now.
I passed! Aaah!
One moment.
- You passed! - Aaah!
Oh, my God!
What? W-w-what? W-what happened?
She passed!
She's a lawyer!
She's moving out!
Yeah!
Group hug!
Hey, hey, hey! Whoa, whoa!
You don't even know what's going on.
Hey, physical contact first, questions later.
What the hell? I passed. Aaah!
Whew!
Now, that's some good cake.
Oh, man.
You know, we need to celebrate more things in life...
Like, for example, "Hey. Congratulations.
You just did six hours at work.
Cake!"
Are you sure you don't already celebrate that way?
It's good to have a dream, Alberto... you know,
like Cristela's dream of moving out that's about to come true.
Felix, she's not leaving yet. She hasn't even gotten the job.
What?
She might not get the job? Can she do that?
My Cristela can do anything she puts her mind to.
Finally a compliment, and it's on my ability to fail.
This is why I don't do it. You don't take it well.
I hope you don't get the job, Cris.
'Cause I don't want you to leave.
You don't tell her that.
You say you want her to get the job,
then before bed, you pray she doesn't.
Such good kids, to pray.
Or is that wrong,
because they're praying for someone to fail?
Yes!
You know, I know I'm gonna regret this, but...
You're gonna miss me, right, ama?
You know what I miss? My appendix!
The doctors took that away from me forever.
Hey, so, Felix, what's the deal? You gonna rent out her room?
'Cause, uh, I can match what she pays.
You know she doesn't pay anything.
I'll double it.
Stop.
I-I don't think this is the right time
to talk about me moving out.
What? No. This is the perfect time.
Is this because of what Henry said?
If it is, you're grounded.
You know, now that Daniela's out of work,
maybe I should stay and help out
with a few hundred dollars for rent.
Hey, I want the old rate.
Cristela, don't worry about me.
Yeah, don't worry about her. She's tough, like... linoleum.
I'm not linoleum.
Hey, come on. Linoleum's nice.
It's like the cheapest, most durable thing
in the whole house.
I am not linoleum!
Someone can't take a compliment.
Cris, I've been looking,
and I think I can get an even better job.
- Really? - Yeah.
And with the severance package I got,
the family might be even better off than we were before.
Don't worry.
I've got it all covered.
Sheesh. How are you not like linoleum?
There she is... Madame attorney!
I got you a present.
It might be lingerie.
Ooh! From Victoria's briefcase?
My aunt gave that to me when I first became a lawyer.
Ohh. Are you sure you want to part with it, Ben?
Yeah. My aunt was really poor.
Great. It'll go with everything else I own.
We still on for dinner?
Mm, only if you're buying. Remember... I'm poor.
♪ I am an attor-ney ♪
Wow. Someone's in a good mood.
Maddie, I am in a place
I've heard about but never experienced.
E-everything in my life is actually going my way.
And what the hell happened to Josh's desk?
Oh, it's empty.
Yeah. I see that.
W-why is it empty?
Because everything's gone.
Man, it's exhausting
always having to explain everything to you.
Okay. Everybody listen up.
Um, I just meant these two,
but I do love it when you freeze.
So go, go, go, go, go!
Well, I guess you're wondering
which one of you is gonna get the job here at the firm.
I'm dying to know, sir.
Mm, well, that's too bad, because, uh, I'm at a loss.
See, uh, these bar results
really threw a monkey wrench into my plans.
What do you mean, daddy?
Well, I had made a decision, but then
Wonder boy had to go and fail,
and then, Maddie passing... well, who saw that coming, huh?
Yes. I'm sneaky smart.
Almost impossible to detect.
Okay, so, wait. When are you gonna decide, daddy?
Well, given the... the weightiness of this decision
and the way it will impact the rest of your lives...
I'm gonna need at least an hour.
Whew.
Oof.
This is so awkward.
You know, one of us isn't gonna get the job,
and the other one's name is already on the sign.
You know, Maddie, if I get the job, I earned it.
They didn't hand it to me
because I'm a spoiled little rich girl.
Wow. You really think that of me?
I've said something similar almost every day
for the past year.
Yeah.
I guess it just hurts a little bit more coming from a lawyer.
By the way, Josh left a note for you in your desk.
You should have told me earlier.
I probably wouldn't have snapped at you...
Oh, my God.
He's moving back home.
I've got to go!
Come on, already!
Fine! I'll take the stairs!
Oh! We're on the 23rd floor!
Doesn't matter!
Thank God. That would have killed me.
Stupid dream catcher.
Fat lot of good you did me.
Last time I make something myself.
You are a coward.
Thanks for stopping by.
I'm not opening it unless you're nicer.
Why? Because you're afraid?
Coward!
Not nicer.
Not locked.
I can't believe you were just gonna leave.
I have to, okay? I made a deal with my parents.
I-I-I can't stay unless I have a paying job.
Well, why don't you get a job as a paralegal somewhere?
Those were all taken by people who knew they would fail.
Oh, why couldn't I have parents
who made me think I was a failure?
Trust me, it's not as great as it sounds.
They're still being so obnoxious.
"Oh, you'll pass next time. No one's as smart as you."
Just setting me up.
It can't end like this.
It had to end sometime.
I mean, it's not like we were gonna take over the firm.
We could.
I've recorded Mr. Culpepper's views on different cultures.
Chinese new year alone could get us the firm
and two of his cars.
Ironically, with cars, he prefers them foreign.
Hmm.
Well...
If you're leaving,
there's something I want to say while I have the chance.
I-it's something I should have said a while ago.
I, uh...
Think I know what it is.
I, uh...
I never thought... I could find someone
I really cared about at the office.
And, uh, I want to thank you
for talking me into going out with Ben.
Not what I thought you were gonna say.
And... and... and... I'm sorry.
When... when did I... When did I talk you into that?
When you said that people in the same office
should date each other.
I wasn't talking about him.
- Uh, were you talking about you? - No!
No, if I wanted to go out with you, I'd just ask you.
Yeah, but you didn't.
Right. So what does that tell you?
Uh, that you don't want to go out with me!
Okay!
All right! So why are you so upset?
I'm not!
It's just... sometimes people...
People raise their voices when they get excited or happy.
Well, there's a whole lot of happy going on in this room!
So, um...
Anyway, um, I am gonna, uh,
I'm gonna call you once I settle in.
Um, with any luck, my parents have gotten wi-fi,
and we can Skype.
Yeah. Yeah.
You know, most of my best relationships
are with people I never see.
Um, h-hey.
It was, um...
It was really nice knowing you, Cristela.
Take care of yourself.
Mm-hmm.
Why didn't I just tell her I liked her?
Dream catcher.
Should have just made a wallet.
Which side do the forks go on?
The left.
Always?
No, not on Tuesdays.
Really?
Why would Tuesday be...
You see, this is why people don't like you.
Dinner is served.
Thai food.
Yeah. It's the only "Thai" that goes with this shirt.
Cristela hates thai food, daddy.
Yeah, well, now that she's leaving,
we're gonna be having a lot of things Cristela doesn't like.
There's something I'm not liking right now, dad.
What, Henry?
Izzy?
Your attitude. And I agree.
There. I said it for both of us.
Hey! Hey!
Don't talk to your father that way.
Even if he is being a jerk.
Sorry, dad.
I'm not hungry right now. Maybe I'll eat later.
Yeah, me too.
Guess I'll eat later, too.
And I'll eat right now.
Could you please be a little more sensitive around the kids?
They're really gonna miss Cris. We all are.
But you were the one saying she should leave.
That doesn't mean I want her to.
I can say one thing and mean something completely different.
I'm very complex.
Unlike linoleum.
Well, you all shouldn't be so sensitive.
You should be more like Natalia.
I'm sensitive. I have feelings.
You have one feeling... anger.
Yes. And I use it to cover up all my other feelings.
Losing Cristela is like...
Losing my second appendix.
Hey.
Is that thai food?
I don't care. Give me some.
Hey, listen, while I got you here, um...
It's cool with me if you stay.
What?
Yeah.
Yeah, I want you to.
Hey, do you want a beer?
Wait, wait, wait. No, no, no, no, no.
You... want me...
To stay here?
Don't make a big deal out of this.
I won't.
Woo me.
Hmm.
Whoo!
Okay, at least explain.
Look...
Everyone in this house will be miserable if you leave.
Ohh. That's sweet.
And they're all starting to take it out on me.
Ohh. Even better.
Okay, I may not be your biggest fan,
but they are.
And the last thing they want
is for their favorite person to walk out the door.
Yeah.
I had a person like that at the office.
Only difference was, I was willing to let him go,
while you're willing to do anything to keep me here.
Even declaring your undying love.
I did not.
I'm not even sure I've done that for Daniela.
Shhhh.
You can't put the genie back into the bottle, Felix.
Thanks.
Does that mean you're gonna stay?
I have no idea.
Oh, there you are.
You said you needed an hour to make your decision.
And you gave me six.
But I'm only gonna bill you for three.
Well, I'm gonna let you slide this time,
because I don't want to have to discipline
my new attorney on her first day.
So tell us who it is, daddy. The suspense is killing me.
Well, I-I-I just...
Uh, it's Cristela!
Okay. Okay.
Okay, this is getting actionable.
I-I'm sorry, sir.
Usually, I like making people cry,
but this is weird.
It's weird for me, too! I just hugged you!
Ohh!
Congratulations, Cristela.
You know, usually, when I say I'm happy for someone,
I'm really not, but this time, I am.
Really?
Mm, don't push it.
- Thank you, Maddie. - Yeah.
And thank you so much, sir.
I will not let you down.
Well, since you already took off a half-day, great start.
I hear you, sir.
And...
As my first act as an attorney,
I believe I get to hire an assistant.
You do not.
No, I...
I'm gonna make Maddie your assistant.
That way, if she falls behind in her work,
you can finish it for her.
What... no, I don't want that job.
What?
Yeah.
Someone I admire called me a spoiled rich girl,
and I don't want to be that anymore.
I want to start earning things on my own.
Wow.
You are really growing up.
I am.
But I'm gonna need something to keep me busy
while I'm figuring it all out,
and it won't take more than a year.
Aw, gee.
I hardly recognized you.
T-that's great,
because I already have somebody in mind for the job...
- Josh! - Josh?
Why would you want to hire that quitter?
Besides, why would he want to humiliate himself
by working for the person that beat him out?
Well, uh...
Unfortunately, he's here to answer that question.
Ta-da?
Hey!
Josh, man, how you doing? Yeah. God, we missed you.
What's... what's it been? Half a day?
I heard everything you said, sir.
Yeah, well, that's fine, 'cause I don't really care.
The reason that I want to take the job here
is because I, um...
I have some unfinished business.
Don't look at me... him.
I believe I would have gotten that job,
and I want to be next in line for associate
when I do pass the bar.
Well, you were in contention.
Till he failed the bar. Am I right?
Well, okay, son. See you tomorrow.
So, what are we doing standing around here?
Let's get back to work!
- Look at us. - Yeah.
A year later, and we're all still here.
Yep.
Two lawyers and an assistant.
How long you gonna rub that in for?
Um, just until you pass the bar.
Yep. Good friends.
Two attorney friends and one helper friend.
God, I wish you were my assistant right now!
I got it. I got the job!
Aah!
Wait. What are those?
Did we win luggage, too?!
I am having a great day!
Those are for you.
You're moving out.
What?
I know you talked with Felix, and he was wrong.
You have a job now.
It's time that you went out on your own.
B-but I have no place to go.
A-a-and those will be hard to get on the bus.
I know. Those are empty.
I just wanted it to be dramatic so you knew I was serious.
You know, just because you look like you belong in a telenovela
doesn't mean you should act like it.
You've helped us out here for a very long time,
and I love you with all of my heart for that.
But it's time that you lived the life of a single girl,
not the life of a beautiful, married mother of two.
Are you sure?
I don't want to leave you here.
I mean, there's still ama to deal with.
About that...
Ooh, isn't this exciting, Cristela?
We're off to live the life of two single girls!
Hey, Daniela, so, I checked, and the, uh,
the apartment across the hall from me is available.
I know it is, 'cause I can see it from my bedroom.
One day! You couldn't give me one day to be happy?!